1. > LIVE FROM THE VENETIAN HOTEL
IN LAS VEGAS, IT'S THE
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2. > LIVE FROM THE VENETIAN HOTEL
IN LAS VEGAS, IT'S THE
REPUBLICAN DEBATE, WITH YOUR
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3. IN LAS VEGAS, IT'S THE
REPUBLICAN DEBATE, WITH YOUR
MODERATOR, WOLF BLITZ.
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4. REPUBLICAN DEBATE, WITH YOUR
MODERATOR, WOLF BLITZ.
GOOD EVENING.
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5. MODERATOR, WOLF BLITZ.
GOOD EVENING.
FOR THOSE OF YOU WHO MISSED OUR
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6. GOOD EVENING.
FOR THOSE OF YOU WHO MISSED OUR
EARLIER DEBATE FEATUING MIKE
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7. FOR THOSE OF YOU WHO MISSED OUR
EARLIER DEBATE FEATUING MIKE
HUCKABEE AND RICK SANTORUM,
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8. EARLIER DEBATE FEATUING MIKE
HUCKABEE AND RICK SANTORUM,
WELL, THE RESULTS ARE IN AND
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9. HUCKABEE AND RICK SANTORUM,
WELL, THE RESULTS ARE IN AND
EVERYBODY LOST.
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10. WELL, THE RESULTS ARE IN AND
EVERYBODY LOST.
NOW LET'S MEET THE CANDIDATES.
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11. EVERYBODY LOST.
NOW LET'S MEET THE CANDIDATES.
NINE ARE HERE TONIGHT.
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12. NOW LET'S MEET THE CANDIDATES.
NINE ARE HERE TONIGHT.
THE FIVE WHO ACTUALLY HAVE A
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13. NINE ARE HERE TONIGHT.
THE FIVE WHO ACTUALLY HAVE A
CHANCE ARE DONALD TRUMP.
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14. THE FIVE WHO ACTUALLY HAVE A
CHANCE ARE DONALD TRUMP.
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15. CHANCE ARE DONALD TRUMP.
TED CRUZ.
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16. TED CRUZ.
BEN CARSON.
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17. BEN CARSON.
MARCO RUBIO.
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18. MARCO RUBIO.
AND, OF COURSE, SWEET JEB
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19. AND, OF COURSE, SWEET JEB
BUSH.
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20. AND, OF COURSE, SWEET JEB
BUSH.
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21. BUSH.
WOULD THE REST OF YOU JUST
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22. WOULD THE REST OF YOU JUST
WAVE SO YOUR PARENTS KNOW YOU'RE
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23. WOULD THE REST OF YOU JUST
WAVE SO YOUR PARENTS KNOW YOU'RE
HERE.
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24. WAVE SO YOUR PARENTS KNOW YOU'RE
HERE.
HEY, BUBBA BOY!
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25. HERE.
HEY, BUBBA BOY!
WE BEGIN WITH THE
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26. HEY, BUBBA BOY!
WE BEGIN WITH THE
FRONTRUNNER.
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27. WE BEGIN WITH THE
FRONTRUNNER.
MR. TRUMP, YOUR OPENING REMARKS.
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28. FRONTRUNNER.
MR. TRUMP, YOUR OPENING REMARKS.
DEBATES ARE STUPID.
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29. MR. TRUMP, YOUR OPENING REMARKS.
DEBATES ARE STUPID.
YOU SHOULD BE PAYING ME, AND
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30. DEBATES ARE STUPID.
YOU SHOULD BE PAYING ME, AND
WOLF BLITZER LOOKS LIKE PAPA
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31. YOU SHOULD BE PAYING ME, AND
WOLF BLITZER LOOKS LIKE PAPA
SMURF.
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32. WOLF BLITZER LOOKS LIKE PAPA
SMURF.
WOLF, MAY I TAKE A DESPERATE
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33. SMURF.
WOLF, MAY I TAKE A DESPERATE
SWING AT DONALD NOW?
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34. WOLF, MAY I TAKE A DESPERATE
SWING AT DONALD NOW?
GO AHEAD, MR. BUSH.
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35. SWING AT DONALD NOW?
GO AHEAD, MR. BUSH.
THIS IS WHAT HE DOES.
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36. GO AHEAD, MR. BUSH.
THIS IS WHAT HE DOES.
HE SAYS THESE FFENIVE THINGS
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37. THIS IS WHAT HE DOES.
HE SAYS THESE FFENIVE THINGS
AND HE BULLIES ANYBODY WHO
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38. HE SAYS THESE FFENIVE THINGS
AND HE BULLIES ANYBODY WHO
CHALLENGES HIM.
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39. AND HE BULLIES ANYBODY WHO
CHALLENGES HIM.
WELL, GUESS WHAT?
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40. CHALLENGES HIM.
WELL, GUESS WHAT?
YOU CAN'T BULLY YOUR WAY TO THE
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41. WELL, GUESS WHAT?
YOU CAN'T BULLY YOUR WAY TO THE
PRESIDENCY.
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42. YOU CAN'T BULLY YOUR WAY TO THE
PRESIDENCY.
OH, YEAH, JEB?
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43. PRESIDENCY.
OH, YEAH, JEB?
BECAUSE I'M AT 43 AND YOU'RE AT
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44. OH, YEAH, JEB?
BECAUSE I'M AT 43 AND YOU'RE AT
3.
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45. BECAUSE I'M AT 43 AND YOU'RE AT
3.
JEB, YOU'RE A NICE GUY, BUT
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46. 3.
JEB, YOU'RE A NICE GUY, BUT
YOU'RE A LIGHTWEIGHT, AND I KNOW
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47. JEB, YOU'RE A NICE GUY, BUT
YOU'RE A LIGHTWEIGHT, AND I KNOW
FOR A FACT THAT YOU PEE SITTING
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48. YOU'RE A LIGHTWEIGHT, AND I KNOW
FOR A FACT THAT YOU PEE SITTING
DOWN.
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49. FOR A FACT THAT YOU PEE SITTING
DOWN.
NO, I DON'T.
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50. DOWN.
NO, I DON'T.
YES, YOU DO.
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51. NO, I DON'T.
YES, YOU DO.
SENATOR, YOU SAID YOU WERE
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52. YES, YOU DO.
SENATOR, YOU SAID YOU WERE
RELENTLESSLY CAR BOMBING ISIS.
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53. SENATOR, YOU SAID YOU WERE
RELENTLESSLY CAR BOMBING ISIS.
IS THIS A REAL STRATEGY?
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54. RELENTLESSLY CAR BOMBING ISIS.
IS THIS A REAL STRATEGY?
WELL, IF I'M PRESIDENT, I CAN
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55. IS THIS A REAL STRATEGY?
WELL, IF I'M PRESIDENT, I CAN
PROMISE YOU ISIS WILL HATE ME.
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56. WELL, IF I'M PRESIDENT, I CAN
PROMISE YOU ISIS WILL HATE ME.
AND HOW DO I KNOW?
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57. PROMISE YOU ISIS WILL HATE ME.
AND HOW DO I KNOW?
BECAUSE EVERYONE WHO KNOWS ME
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58. AND HOW DO I KNOW?
BECAUSE EVERYONE WHO KNOWS ME
HATES ME.
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59. BECAUSE EVERYONE WHO KNOWS ME
HATES ME.
DEMOCRATS HATE ME.
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60. HATES ME.
DEMOCRATS HATE ME.
REPUBLICANS HATE ME.
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61. DEMOCRATS HATE ME.
REPUBLICANS HATE ME.
I HAVE WHAT DOCTORS CALL A
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62. REPUBLICANS HATE ME.
I HAVE WHAT DOCTORS CALL A
PUNCHABLE FACE.
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63. I HAVE WHAT DOCTORS CALL A
PUNCHABLE FACE.
POLITICO ACTUALLY DID A POLL AND
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64. PUNCHABLE FACE.
POLITICO ACTUALLY DID A POLL AND
I WAS VOTED THE CANDIDATE PEOPLE
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65. POLITICO ACTUALLY DID A POLL AND
I WAS VOTED THE CANDIDATE PEOPLE
MOST WANT TO THROW A BEER AT.
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66. I WAS VOTED THE CANDIDATE PEOPLE
MOST WANT TO THROW A BEER AT.
SO LOOK OUT, ISIS, BECAUSE I'M
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67. MOST WANT TO THROW A BEER AT.
SO LOOK OUT, ISIS, BECAUSE I'M
GOING TO CRASH YOUR PARTY.
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68. SO LOOK OUT, ISIS, BECAUSE I'M
GOING TO CRASH YOUR PARTY.
AND JUST LIKE EVERY PARTY I GO
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69. GOING TO CRASH YOUR PARTY.
AND JUST LIKE EVERY PARTY I GO
TO, I'M GOING TO RUIN IT.
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70. AND JUST LIKE EVERY PARTY I GO
TO, I'M GOING TO RUIN IT.
GOVERNOR CHRISTIE, WHAT STEPS
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71. TO, I'M GOING TO RUIN IT.
GOVERNOR CHRISTIE, WHAT STEPS
WOULD YOU TAKE TO KEEP AMERICANS
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72. GOVERNOR CHRISTIE, WHAT STEPS
WOULD YOU TAKE TO KEEP AMERICANS
SAFE?
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73. WOULD YOU TAKE TO KEEP AMERICANS
SAFE?
WOLF, I WOULD LIKE TO ANSWER
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74. SAFE?
WOLF, I WOULD LIKE TO ANSWER
THAT WITH A SERIES OF
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75. WOLF, I WOULD LIKE TO ANSWER
THAT WITH A SERIES OF
FEAR-MONGERING STATEMENTS.
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76. THAT WITH A SERIES OF
FEAR-MONGERING STATEMENTS.
GO AHEAD.
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77. FEAR-MONGERING STATEMENTS.
GO AHEAD.
WE ARE UNDER ATTACK AND WE'RE
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78. GO AHEAD.
WE ARE UNDER ATTACK AND WE'RE
ALL GOING TO DIE.
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79. WE ARE UNDER ATTACK AND WE'RE
ALL GOING TO DIE.
MOTHERS ARE PUTTING THEIR KIDS
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80. ALL GOING TO DIE.
MOTHERS ARE PUTTING THEIR KIDS
ON BUSES, AND THESE BUSES ARE
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81. MOTHERS ARE PUTTING THEIR KIDS
ON BUSES, AND THESE BUSES ARE
BEING DRIVEN OFF CLIFFS BY
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82. ON BUSES, AND THESE BUSES ARE
BEING DRIVEN OFF CLIFFS BY
TERRORISTS.
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83. BEING DRIVEN OFF CLIFFS BY
TERRORISTS.
TODAY IN OUR GREAT COUNTRY, ONE
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84. TERRORISTS.
TODAY IN OUR GREAT COUNTRY, ONE
OUT OF EVERY THREE BABIES BORN
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85. TODAY IN OUR GREAT COUNTRY, ONE
OUT OF EVERY THREE BABIES BORN
ARE ALREADY IN ISIS.
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86. OUT OF EVERY THREE BABIES BORN
ARE ALREADY IN ISIS.
THEY ARE HERE, FOLKS.
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87. ARE ALREADY IN ISIS.
THEY ARE HERE, FOLKS.
AND I AM THE ONLY ONE UP HERE
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88. THEY ARE HERE, FOLKS.
AND I AM THE ONLY ONE UP HERE
WITH THE STONES TO TAKE THEM ON.
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89. AND I AM THE ONLY ONE UP HERE
WITH THE STONES TO TAKE THEM ON.
I AM A COWBOY.
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90. WITH THE STONES TO TAKE THEM ON.
I AM A COWBOY.
ON A STEEL HORSE I RIDE.
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91. I AM A COWBOY.
ON A STEEL HORSE I RIDE.
LISTEN TO THIS MAN.
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92. ON A STEEL HORSE I RIDE.
LISTEN TO THIS MAN.
HE'S TRYING TO START WORLD WAR
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93. LISTEN TO THIS MAN.
HE'S TRYING TO START WORLD WAR
III.
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94. HE'S TRYING TO START WORLD WAR
III.
SIR, WE'RE NOT TAKING
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95. III.
SIR, WE'RE NOT TAKING
COMMENTS FROM THE AUDIENCE YET.
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96. SIR, WE'RE NOT TAKING
COMMENTS FROM THE AUDIENCE YET.
NO, I'M RAND PAUL.
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97. COMMENTS FROM THE AUDIENCE YET.
NO, I'M RAND PAUL.
I'M UP HERE.
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98. NO, I'M RAND PAUL.
I'M UP HERE.
OH.
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99. I'M UP HERE.
OH.
SORRY.
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100. OH.
SORRY.
WELL, LET'S GO TO DR. CARSON.
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101. SORRY.
WELL, LET'S GO TO DR. CARSON.
DOCTOR, DO YOU, A BRAIN SURGEON,
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102. WELL, LET'S GO TO DR. CARSON.
DOCTOR, DO YOU, A BRAIN SURGEON,
HAVE THE EXPERIENCE AND
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103. DOCTOR, DO YOU, A BRAIN SURGEON,
HAVE THE EXPERIENCE AND
TOUGHNESS TO DEAL WITH WORLD
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104. HAVE THE EXPERIENCE AND
TOUGHNESS TO DEAL WITH WORLD
LEADERS LIKE VLADIMIR PUTIN?
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105. TOUGHNESS TO DEAL WITH WORLD
LEADERS LIKE VLADIMIR PUTIN?
WELL, THAT QUESTION MAKES ME
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106. LEADERS LIKE VLADIMIR PUTIN?
WELL, THAT QUESTION MAKES ME
FURIOUS, WOLF.
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107. WELL, THAT QUESTION MAKES ME
FURIOUS, WOLF.
I MIGHT GO HAM UP IN HERE RIGHT
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108. FURIOUS, WOLF.
I MIGHT GO HAM UP IN HERE RIGHT
NOW.
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109. I MIGHT GO HAM UP IN HERE RIGHT
NOW.
OF COURSE I CAN BE TOUGH.
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110. NOW.
OF COURSE I CAN BE TOUGH.
AS A SURGEON, I TELL PEOPLE
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111. OF COURSE I CAN BE TOUGH.
AS A SURGEON, I TELL PEOPLE
THINGS THEY DON'T WANT TO HEAR.
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112. AS A SURGEON, I TELL PEOPLE
THINGS THEY DON'T WANT TO HEAR.
NOT THAT THEY HAVE TO HAVE BRAIN
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113. THINGS THEY DON'T WANT TO HEAR.
NOT THAT THEY HAVE TO HAVE BRAIN
SURGERY, THAT IT WILL BE
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114. NOT THAT THEY HAVE TO HAVE BRAIN
SURGERY, THAT IT WILL BE
PERFORMED BY ME, A MAN WHO THEY
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115. SURGERY, THAT IT WILL BE
PERFORMED BY ME, A MAN WHO THEY
BELIEVE TO BE ASLEEP.
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116. PERFORMED BY ME, A MAN WHO THEY
BELIEVE TO BE ASLEEP.
I'M NOT ASLEEP.
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117. BELIEVE TO BE ASLEEP.
I'M NOT ASLEEP.
I'M AMPED, I'M JACKED AND I'M
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118. I'M NOT ASLEEP.
I'M AMPED, I'M JACKED AND I'M
READY TO THROW DOWN.
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119. I'M AMPED, I'M JACKED AND I'M
READY TO THROW DOWN.
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120. READY TO THROW DOWN.
WHAT DO YOU THINK OF THAT,
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121. WHAT DO YOU THINK OF THAT,
MR. PUTIN?
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122. WHAT DO YOU THINK OF THAT,
MR. PUTIN?
MS. FIORINA, YOUR THOUGHTS?
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123. MR. PUTIN?
MS. FIORINA, YOUR THOUGHTS?
YOU WANT TO TALK ABOUT PUTIN.
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124. MS. FIORINA, YOUR THOUGHTS?
YOU WANT TO TALK ABOUT PUTIN.
I KNOW VLADIMIR PUTIN
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125. YOU WANT TO TALK ABOUT PUTIN.
I KNOW VLADIMIR PUTIN
PERSONALLY.
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126. I KNOW VLADIMIR PUTIN
PERSONALLY.
I SOLD HIM AN HP PRINTER AND NOW
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127. PERSONALLY.
I SOLD HIM AN HP PRINTER AND NOW
HE HATES MY GUTS.
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128. I SOLD HIM AN HP PRINTER AND NOW
HE HATES MY GUTS.
IT DOESN'T WORK.
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129. HE HATES MY GUTS.
IT DOESN'T WORK.
IT NEVER WORKED.
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130. IT DOESN'T WORK.
IT NEVER WORKED.
AND WHEN PUTIN CALLED ME TO
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131. IT NEVER WORKED.
AND WHEN PUTIN CALLED ME TO
COMPLAIN, I JUST SMILED THAT
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132. AND WHEN PUTIN CALLED ME TO
COMPLAIN, I JUST SMILED THAT
CLASSIC CARLY FIORINA SMILE.
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133. COMPLAIN, I JUST SMILED THAT
CLASSIC CARLY FIORINA SMILE.
OKAY, WELL, IT LOOKS LIKE JEB
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134. CLASSIC CARLY FIORINA SMILE.
OKAY, WELL, IT LOOKS LIKE JEB
HAS GOT HIS COURAGE BACK UP.
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135. OKAY, WELL, IT LOOKS LIKE JEB
HAS GOT HIS COURAGE BACK UP.
HE'S READY TO TAKE ANOTHER RUN
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136. HAS GOT HIS COURAGE BACK UP.
HE'S READY TO TAKE ANOTHER RUN
AT TRUMP.
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137. HE'S READY TO TAKE ANOTHER RUN
AT TRUMP.
MR. BUSH, GO AHEAD AND SAY OUT
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138. AT TRUMP.
MR. BUSH, GO AHEAD AND SAY OUT
LOUD WHAT YOU'VE BEEN QUIETLY
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139. MR. BUSH, GO AHEAD AND SAY OUT
LOUD WHAT YOU'VE BEEN QUIETLY
MUTTERING TO YOURSELF.
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140. LOUD WHAT YOU'VE BEEN QUIETLY
MUTTERING TO YOURSELF.
THIS GUY IS THE CHAOS
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141. MUTTERING TO YOURSELF.
THIS GUY IS THE CHAOS
CANDIDATE?
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142. THIS GUY IS THE CHAOS
CANDIDATE?
AM I RIGHT?
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143. CANDIDATE?
AM I RIGHT?
CHAOS?
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144. AM I RIGHT?
CHAOS?
IS HE FOR REAL?
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145. CHAOS?
IS HE FOR REAL?
NO, MAN.
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146. IS HE FOR REAL?
NO, MAN.
JEB, YOU'RE A VERY NICE MAN,
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147. NO, MAN.
JEB, YOU'RE A VERY NICE MAN,
BUT YOU'RE BASICALLY A LITTLE
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148. JEB, YOU'RE A VERY NICE MAN,
BUT YOU'RE BASICALLY A LITTLE
GIRL.
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149. BUT YOU'RE BASICALLY A LITTLE
GIRL.
FOLKS, THIS IS TRUE.
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150. GIRL.
FOLKS, THIS IS TRUE.
I GOT AHOLD OF JEB'S BIRTH
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151. FOLKS, THIS IS TRUE.
I GOT AHOLD OF JEB'S BIRTH
CERTIFICATE, AND FULL
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152. I GOT AHOLD OF JEB'S BIRTH
CERTIFICATE, AND FULL
DISCLOSURE, HIS REAL NAME IS
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153. CERTIFICATE, AND FULL
DISCLOSURE, HIS REAL NAME IS
JEBRA.
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154. DISCLOSURE, HIS REAL NAME IS
JEBRA.
THAT IS NOT TRUE.
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155. JEBRA.
THAT IS NOT TRUE.
THAT IS TRUE, YES, IT IS.
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156. THAT IS NOT TRUE.
THAT IS TRUE, YES, IT IS.
JEBRA!
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157. THAT IS TRUE, YES, IT IS.
JEBRA!
JEBRA!
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158. JEBRA!
JEBRA!
HEY, THAT'S NOT MY NAME.
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159. JEBRA!
HEY, THAT'S NOT MY NAME.
HEY, JEBRA, LOSER, SAY WHAT?
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160. HEY, THAT'S NOT MY NAME.
HEY, JEBRA, LOSER, SAY WHAT?
LET'S MOVE ON TO SENATOR
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161. HEY, JEBRA, LOSER, SAY WHAT?
LET'S MOVE ON TO SENATOR
RUBIO.
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162. LET'S MOVE ON TO SENATOR
RUBIO.
SENATOR, A FEW WEEKS AGO, YOU
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163. RUBIO.
SENATOR, A FEW WEEKS AGO, YOU
WERE MANY PEOPLE'S PICK AS THE
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164. SENATOR, A FEW WEEKS AGO, YOU
WERE MANY PEOPLE'S PICK AS THE
MOST ELECTABLE CANDIDATE.
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165. WERE MANY PEOPLE'S PICK AS THE
MOST ELECTABLE CANDIDATE.
TONIGHT YOU'RE IN FOURTH PLACE.
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166. MOST ELECTABLE CANDIDATE.
TONIGHT YOU'RE IN FOURTH PLACE.
ARE YOU RESONATING WITH VOTERS?
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167. TONIGHT YOU'RE IN FOURTH PLACE.
ARE YOU RESONATING WITH VOTERS?
WOLF, LET'S REMEMBER ONE
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168. ARE YOU RESONATING WITH VOTERS?
WOLF, LET'S REMEMBER ONE
THING.
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169. WOLF, LET'S REMEMBER ONE
THING.
I AM BY FAR THE MOST ATTRACTIVE
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170. THING.
I AM BY FAR THE MOST ATTRACTIVE
PERSON ON THIS STAGE.
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171. I AM BY FAR THE MOST ATTRACTIVE
PERSON ON THIS STAGE.
I'M A HARD 7, BABY.
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172. PERSON ON THIS STAGE.
I'M A HARD 7, BABY.
I'M YOUNG, CUBAN, AND LET'S FACE
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173. I'M A HARD 7, BABY.
I'M YOUNG, CUBAN, AND LET'S FACE
IT, I'M THE ONLY ONE UP HERE YOU
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174. I'M YOUNG, CUBAN, AND LET'S FACE
IT, I'M THE ONLY ONE UP HERE YOU
WOULD SWIPE RIGHT ON.
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175. IT, I'M THE ONLY ONE UP HERE YOU
WOULD SWIPE RIGHT ON.
SO WHY AM I LOSING TO THIS GUY?
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176. WOULD SWIPE RIGHT ON.
SO WHY AM I LOSING TO THIS GUY?
BEFORE WE GO TO COMMERCIAL,
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177. SO WHY AM I LOSING TO THIS GUY?
BEFORE WE GO TO COMMERCIAL,
WE'LL GIVE JEB ONE LAST CHANCE
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178. BEFORE WE GO TO COMMERCIAL,
WE'LL GIVE JEB ONE LAST CHANCE
TO MAKE AN IMPRESSION.
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179. WE'LL GIVE JEB ONE LAST CHANCE
TO MAKE AN IMPRESSION.
IF WE WORK TOGETHER, WE CAN
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180. TO MAKE AN IMPRESSION.
IF WE WORK TOGETHER, WE CAN
STOP DONALD TRUMP.
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181. IF WE WORK TOGETHER, WE CAN
STOP DONALD TRUMP.
IF YOU COMBINE MY NUMBERS WITH
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182. STOP DONALD TRUMP.
IF YOU COMBINE MY NUMBERS WITH
YOURS, YOURS AND YOURS, WE WOULD
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183. IF YOU COMBINE MY NUMBERS WITH
YOURS, YOURS AND YOURS, WE WOULD
ALMOST WIN.
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184. YOURS, YOURS AND YOURS, WE WOULD
ALMOST WIN.
HEY, JEBRA, SHUT YOUR
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185. ALMOST WIN.
HEY, JEBRA, SHUT YOUR
PIEHOLE.
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186. HEY, JEBRA, SHUT YOUR
PIEHOLE.
YOU KNOW WHAT, YOU'RE A JERK.
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187. PIEHOLE.
YOU KNOW WHAT, YOU'RE A JERK.
YOU'RE NEVER GOING TO BE
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188. YOU KNOW WHAT, YOU'RE A JERK.
YOU'RE NEVER GOING TO BE
PRESIDENT, DONALD.
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189. YOU'RE NEVER GOING TO BE
PRESIDENT, DONALD.
NO KIDDING.
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190. PRESIDENT, DONALD.
NO KIDDING.
NONE OF US ARE, GENIUS.
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191. NO KIDDING.
NONE OF US ARE, GENIUS.
AND I'LL TELL YOU SOMETHING
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192. NONE OF US ARE, GENIUS.
AND I'LL TELL YOU SOMETHING
ELSE.
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193. AND I'LL TELL YOU SOMETHING
ELSE.
LIVE FROM NEW YORK, IT'S
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194. ELSE.
LIVE FROM NEW YORK, IT'S
SATURDAY NIGHT!
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195. LIVE FROM NEW YORK, IT'S
SATURDAY NIGHT!
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196. SATURDAY NIGHT!
"SATURDAY NIGHT
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197. "SATURDAY NIGHT
LIVE."
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198. "SATURDAY NIGHT
LIVE."
WITH VANESSA BAYER!
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199. LIVE."
WITH VANESSA BAYER!
BECK BENNETT!
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200. WITH VANESSA BAYER!
BECK BENNETT!
AIDY BRYANT!
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201. BECK BENNETT!
AIDY BRYANT!
COLIN JOST!
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202. AIDY BRYANT!
COLIN JOST!
TARAN KILLAM!
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203. COLIN JOST!
TARAN KILLAM!
KATE McKINNON!
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204. TARAN KILLAM!
KATE McKINNON!
KYLE MOONEY!
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205. KATE McKINNON!
KYLE MOONEY!
BOBBY MOYNIHAN!
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206. KYLE MOONEY!
BOBBY MOYNIHAN!
JAY PHARAOH!
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207. BOBBY MOYNIHAN!
JAY PHARAOH!
CECILY STRONG!
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208. JAY PHARAOH!
CECILY STRONG!
KENAN THOMPSON!
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209. CECILY STRONG!
KENAN THOMPSON!
SASHEER ZAMATA!
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210. KENAN THOMPSON!
SASHEER ZAMATA!
FEATURING MICHAEL CHE, PETE
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211. SASHEER ZAMATA!
FEATURING MICHAEL CHE, PETE
DAVIDSON, LESLIE JONES, JON
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212. FEATURING MICHAEL CHE, PETE
DAVIDSON, LESLIE JONES, JON
RUDNITSKY.
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213. DAVIDSON, LESLIE JONES, JON
RUDNITSKY.
MUSICAL GUEST BRUCE SPRINGSTEEN
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214. RUDNITSKY.
MUSICAL GUEST BRUCE SPRINGSTEEN
AND THE E STREET BAND.
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215. MUSICAL GUEST BRUCE SPRINGSTEEN
AND THE E STREET BAND.
AND YOUR HOSTS, TINA FEY AND AMY
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216. AND THE E STREET BAND.
AND YOUR HOSTS, TINA FEY AND AMY
POEHLER!
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217. AND YOUR HOSTS, TINA FEY AND AMY
POEHLER!
LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, TINA FEY
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218. POEHLER!
LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, TINA FEY
AND AMY POEHLER!
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219. LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, TINA FEY
AND AMY POEHLER!
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220. AND AMY POEHLER!
> THANK YOU, THANK YOU, THANK
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221. > THANK YOU, THANK YOU, THANK
YOU VERY MUCH.
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222. > THANK YOU, THANK YOU, THANK
YOU VERY MUCH.
I'M SO HAPPY TO BE BACK HOME
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223. YOU VERY MUCH.
I'M SO HAPPY TO BE BACK HOME
HOSTING "SATURDAY NIGHT LIVE."
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224. I'M SO HAPPY TO BE BACK HOME
HOSTING "SATURDAY NIGHT LIVE."
SORRY, WE'VE BEEN TOGETHER
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225. HOSTING "SATURDAY NIGHT LIVE."
SORRY, WE'VE BEEN TOGETHER
FOR —
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226. SORRY, WE'VE BEEN TOGETHER
FOR —
— THE PAST TWO MONTHS
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227. FOR —
— THE PAST TWO MONTHS
NONSTOP.
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228. — THE PAST TWO MONTHS
NONSTOP.
WE'RE AT THE POINT WHERE
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229. NONSTOP.
WE'RE AT THE POINT WHERE
WE'RE —
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230. WE'RE AT THE POINT WHERE
WE'RE —
FINISHING EACH OTHER'S
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231. WE'RE —
FINISHING EACH OTHER'S
SENTENCES.
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232. FINISHING EACH OTHER'S
SENTENCES.
FAVORITE CHRISTMAS MOVIE.
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233. SENTENCES.
FAVORITE CHRISTMAS MOVIE.
WE HAVE BEEN FRIENDS FOR LIKE 20
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234. FAVORITE CHRISTMAS MOVIE.
WE HAVE BEEN FRIENDS FOR LIKE 20
YEARS.
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235. WE HAVE BEEN FRIENDS FOR LIKE 20
YEARS.
I'VE LIKED HER LONGER, BUT HERE
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236. YEARS.
I'VE LIKED HER LONGER, BUT HERE
IS A PICTURE OF US WHEN WE WERE
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237. I'VE LIKED HER LONGER, BUT HERE
IS A PICTURE OF US WHEN WE WERE
YOUNG IMPROVISERS BACK IN
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238. IS A PICTURE OF US WHEN WE WERE
YOUNG IMPROVISERS BACK IN
CHICAGO.
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239. YOUNG IMPROVISERS BACK IN
CHICAGO.
SO YOUNG AND SO SWEATY.
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240. CHICAGO.
SO YOUNG AND SO SWEATY.
AND WE ARE LIKE SISTERS,
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241. SO YOUNG AND SO SWEATY.
AND WE ARE LIKE SISTERS,
WHICH MADE IT VERY EASY FOR US
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242. AND WE ARE LIKE SISTERS,
WHICH MADE IT VERY EASY FOR US
TO PLAY SISTERS IN OUR NEW MOVIE
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243. WHICH MADE IT VERY EASY FOR US
TO PLAY SISTERS IN OUR NEW MOVIE
"STAR WARS."
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244. TO PLAY SISTERS IN OUR NEW MOVIE
"STAR WARS."
AND LIKE SISTERS, WE ARE
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245. "STAR WARS."
AND LIKE SISTERS, WE ARE
TOTALLY BONDED BUT VERY
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246. AND LIKE SISTERS, WE ARE
TOTALLY BONDED BUT VERY
DIFFERENT.
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247. TOTALLY BONDED BUT VERY
DIFFERENT.
FOR EXAMPLE, I KIND OF LIKE
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248. DIFFERENT.
FOR EXAMPLE, I KIND OF LIKE
THINGS THAT ARE MORE MODERN AND
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249. FOR EXAMPLE, I KIND OF LIKE
THINGS THAT ARE MORE MODERN AND
FUN.
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250. THINGS THAT ARE MORE MODERN AND
FUN.
AND I AM EXTREMELY
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251. FUN.
AND I AM EXTREMELY
TRADITIONAL AND DANGEROUSLY
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252. AND I AM EXTREMELY
TRADITIONAL AND DANGEROUSLY
RELIGIOUS.
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253. TRADITIONAL AND DANGEROUSLY
RELIGIOUS.
BUT TWO THINGS WE BOTH LOVE
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254. RELIGIOUS.
BUT TWO THINGS WE BOTH LOVE
ARE CHRISTMAS AND MAKING MONEY
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255. BUT TWO THINGS WE BOTH LOVE
ARE CHRISTMAS AND MAKING MONEY
OFF OF ORIGINAL CHRISTMAS SONGS.
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256. ARE CHRISTMAS AND MAKING MONEY
OFF OF ORIGINAL CHRISTMAS SONGS.
SO TO SHOWCASE OUR DIFFERENT
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257. OFF OF ORIGINAL CHRISTMAS SONGS.
SO TO SHOWCASE OUR DIFFERENT
FLAVORS, WE WROTE THIS ORIGINAL
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258. SO TO SHOWCASE OUR DIFFERENT
FLAVORS, WE WROTE THIS ORIGINAL
CHRISTMAS SONG.
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259. FLAVORS, WE WROTE THIS ORIGINAL
CHRISTMAS SONG.
HIT IT, AMY.
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260. HIT IT, AMY.
♪ MERRY CHRISTMAS, BABY
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261. TIME ♪
♪ MERRY CHRISTMAS, BABY
♪ AND
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262. THAT'S NOT REALLY A COMBO.
IT IS IN MY MOUTH.
HEY, CAN SOMEONE GET THE SWITCH?
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263. IT IS IN MY MOUTH.
HEY, CAN SOMEONE GET THE SWITCH?
SURE.
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264. HEY, CAN SOMEONE GET THE SWITCH?
SURE.
NOT REALLY.
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265. SURE.
NOT REALLY.
WHAT?
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266. WHAT?
♪ MERRY CHRISTMAS BABY
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267. GONNA SLAP A BOW ON YOU
MERRY CHRISTMAS BABY ♪
♪ BECAUSE I LOVE YOU BABY
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268. THAT IS TRUE ♪
♪ THE WISE MEN
HAVE DESCENDED
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269. FROM HIGH
MAHER-SHALAL-HASH-BAZ ♪
OKAY, THIS STUFF IS GREAT BUT
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270. MAHER-SHALAL-HASH-BAZ ♪
OKAY, THIS STUFF IS GREAT BUT
IT MIGHT BE A LITTLE DRY ON ITS
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271. OKAY, THIS STUFF IS GREAT BUT
IT MIGHT BE A LITTLE DRY ON ITS
OWN.
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272. IT MIGHT BE A LITTLE DRY ON ITS
OWN.
LET'S DO A MASH-UP!
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273. OWN.
LET'S DO A MASH-UP!
DO YOU WANT TO PUT YOUR SALAMI
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274. LET'S DO A MASH-UP!
DO YOU WANT TO PUT YOUR SALAMI
IN MY PEANUT BUTTER?
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275. DO YOU WANT TO PUT YOUR SALAMI
IN MY PEANUT BUTTER?
WELL, IT WOULDN'T BE THE
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276. IN MY PEANUT BUTTER?
WELL, IT WOULDN'T BE THE
FIRST TIME.
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277. WELL, IT WOULDN'T BE THE
FIRST TIME.
♪ MERRY CHRISTMAS BABY
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278. FIRST TIME.
♪ MERRY CHRISTMAS BABY
THE VIRGIN MARY WAS
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279. THE VIRGIN MARY WAS
A SPECIAL LADY ♪
♪ MERRY CHRISTMAS BABY
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280. A SPECIAL LADY ♪
♪ MERRY CHRISTMAS BABY
YEAAAAAH
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281. YOWWWW
MEOWWW ♪
♪ GLORY JOY
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282. WE'VE GOT A GREAT SHOW.
BRUCE SPRINGSTEEN AND THE E
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283. WE'VE GOT A GREAT SHOW.
BRUCE SPRINGSTEEN AND THE E
STREET BAND ARE HERE.
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284. BRUCE SPRINGSTEEN AND THE E
STREET BAND ARE HERE.
SO STICK AROUND, WE'LL BE RIGHT
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285. STREET BAND ARE HERE.
SO STICK AROUND, WE'LL BE RIGHT
BACK!
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286. SO STICK AROUND, WE'LL BE RIGHT
BACK!
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287. ♪ I'M DREAMING OF A
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288. WHITE HOUSE ♪
>MERRY CHRISTMAS, HILLARY.
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289. >MERRY CHRISTMAS, HILLARY.
IN JUST 11 MONTHS, YOU'RE GONNA
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290. >MERRY CHRISTMAS, HILLARY.
IN JUST 11 MONTHS, YOU'RE GONNA
FINALLY GET YOUR PRESENT.
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291. IN JUST 11 MONTHS, YOU'RE GONNA
FINALLY GET YOUR PRESENT.
NO ONE CAN STOP YOU NOW.
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292. FINALLY GET YOUR PRESENT.
NO ONE CAN STOP YOU NOW.
THE REPUBLICANS ARE BOZOS, AND
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293. NO ONE CAN STOP YOU NOW.
THE REPUBLICANS ARE BOZOS, AND
THE DNC IS SABOTAGING BERNIE.
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294. THE REPUBLICANS ARE BOZOS, AND
THE DNC IS SABOTAGING BERNIE.
I THINK YOU'RE GOING TO SLEEP
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295. THE DNC IS SABOTAGING BERNIE.
I THINK YOU'RE GOING TO SLEEP
WELL TONIGHT.
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296. I THINK YOU'RE GOING TO SLEEP
WELL TONIGHT.
LET ME JUST GET IN MY PA JACK
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297. WELL TONIGHT.
LET ME JUST GET IN MY PA JACK
AS.
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298. LET ME JUST GET IN MY PA JACK
AS.
SO RELAXING, PERFECT.
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299. AS.
SO RELAXING, PERFECT.
NOW LET'S JUST GET TUCKED INTO
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300. SO RELAXING, PERFECT.
NOW LET'S JUST GET TUCKED INTO
BED HERE ALL NICE AND COZY.
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301. NOW LET'S JUST GET TUCKED INTO
BED HERE ALL NICE AND COZY.
FOR A NIGHT OF PRODUCTIVE
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302. BED HERE ALL NICE AND COZY.
FOR A NIGHT OF PRODUCTIVE
DREAMING.
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303. FOR A NIGHT OF PRODUCTIVE
DREAMING.
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304. DREAMING.
HELLO?
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305. HELLO?
IS SOMEONE THERE?
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306. HELLO?
IS SOMEONE THERE?
I HEAR STRONG, YET FEMININE
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307. IS SOMEONE THERE?
I HEAR STRONG, YET FEMININE
LAUGHTER.
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308. I HEAR STRONG, YET FEMININE
LAUGHTER.
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309. LAUGHTER.
HELLO!
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310. HELLO!
HILLARY!
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311. HILLARY!
IT'S ME, HILLARY, FROM
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312. HILLARY!
IT'S ME, HILLARY, FROM
CHRISTMAS EVE 2008.
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313. IT'S ME, HILLARY, FROM
CHRISTMAS EVE 2008.
HI, HILLARY!
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314. CHRISTMAS EVE 2008.
HI, HILLARY!
HELLO, HELLO, HELLO.
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315. HI, HILLARY!
HELLO, HELLO, HELLO.
HELLO, HELLO, HELLO.
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316. HELLO, HELLO, HELLO.
HELLO, HELLO, HELLO.
YOU CHANGED YOUR HAIR.
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317. HELLO, HELLO, HELLO.
YOU CHANGED YOUR HAIR.
PEOPLE SAID I SHOULD, SO I
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318. YOU CHANGED YOUR HAIR.
PEOPLE SAID I SHOULD, SO I
DID.
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319. PEOPLE SAID I SHOULD, SO I
DID.
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320. DID.
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321. AND YOUR LAUGH IS DIFFERENT,
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322. AND YOUR LAUGH IS DIFFERENT,
TOO.
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323. AND YOUR LAUGH IS DIFFERENT,
TOO.
IT'S LESS JOYFUL.
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324. TOO.
IT'S LESS JOYFUL.
WELL, I'VE BEEN THROUGH SEVEN
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325. IT'S LESS JOYFUL.
WELL, I'VE BEEN THROUGH SEVEN
YEARS MORE THINGS, SO —
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326. WELL, I'VE BEEN THROUGH SEVEN
YEARS MORE THINGS, SO —
HERE'S A LITTLE SNEAK PEEK,
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327. YEARS MORE THINGS, SO —
HERE'S A LITTLE SNEAK PEEK,
BENGHAZI.
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328. HERE'S A LITTLE SNEAK PEEK,
BENGHAZI.
WHO IS BENGHAZI?
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329. BENGHAZI.
WHO IS BENGHAZI?
YOU YOUNG, NAIVE GIRL OF 61.
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330. WHO IS BENGHAZI?
YOU YOUNG, NAIVE GIRL OF 61.
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331. YOU YOUNG, NAIVE GIRL OF 61.
DON'T WORRY, DON'T WORRY.
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332. DON'T WORRY, DON'T WORRY.
IT ALL WORKS OUT, WE'RE ABOUT TO
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333. DON'T WORRY, DON'T WORRY.
IT ALL WORKS OUT, WE'RE ABOUT TO
BE THE PRESIDENT.
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334. IT ALL WORKS OUT, WE'RE ABOUT TO
BE THE PRESIDENT.
THAT'S ACTUALLY WHY I'M HERE,
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335. BE THE PRESIDENT.
THAT'S ACTUALLY WHY I'M HERE,
HILLARY, TO WARN YOU.
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336. THAT'S ACTUALLY WHY I'M HERE,
HILLARY, TO WARN YOU.
ON CHRISTMAS EVE 2007, I WAS
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337. HILLARY, TO WARN YOU.
ON CHRISTMAS EVE 2007, I WAS
COCKY, TOO.
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338. ON CHRISTMAS EVE 2007, I WAS
COCKY, TOO.
THEN SOMEONE NAMED BARACK OBAMA
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339. COCKY, TOO.
THEN SOMEONE NAMED BARACK OBAMA
STUMBLED OUT OF A SOUP KITCHEN
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340. THEN SOMEONE NAMED BARACK OBAMA
STUMBLED OUT OF A SOUP KITCHEN
WITH A BASKETBALL AND A
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341. STUMBLED OUT OF A SOUP KITCHEN
WITH A BASKETBALL AND A
CIGARETTE AND STOLE MY LIFE.
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342. WITH A BASKETBALL AND A
CIGARETTE AND STOLE MY LIFE.
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343. CIGARETTE AND STOLE MY LIFE.
I REMEMBER, BUT IT'S
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344. I REMEMBER, BUT IT'S
DIFFERENT THIS TIME.
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345. I REMEMBER, BUT IT'S
DIFFERENT THIS TIME.
I'M RUNNING AGAINST BERNIE
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346. DIFFERENT THIS TIME.
I'M RUNNING AGAINST BERNIE
"NEVER-HEARD-OF-HIM" SANDERS.
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347. I'M RUNNING AGAINST BERNIE
"NEVER-HEARD-OF-HIM" SANDERS.
WELL, WE LOVE BERNIE.
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348. "NEVER-HEARD-OF-HIM" SANDERS.
WELL, WE LOVE BERNIE.
HE'S A GREAT SENATOR.
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349. WELL, WE LOVE BERNIE.
HE'S A GREAT SENATOR.
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350. HE'S A GREAT SENATOR.
BERNIE SANDERS IS A HUMAN
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351. BERNIE SANDERS IS A HUMAN
BIRKENSTOCK.
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352. BERNIE SANDERS IS A HUMAN
BIRKENSTOCK.
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353. BIRKENSTOCK.
MAMA'S GOT THIS PRESIDENCY IN
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354. MAMA'S GOT THIS PRESIDENCY IN
THE BAG.
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355. MAMA'S GOT THIS PRESIDENCY IN
THE BAG.
LET US POUND TO THAT.
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356. THE BAG.
LET US POUND TO THAT.
LET US WHAT TO WHAT?
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357. LET US POUND TO THAT.
LET US WHAT TO WHAT?
OH, I'M SORRY.
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358. LET US WHAT TO WHAT?
OH, I'M SORRY.
THAT'S HOW I HAVE TO TALK IN
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359. OH, I'M SORRY.
THAT'S HOW I HAVE TO TALK IN
2015.
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360. THAT'S HOW I HAVE TO TALK IN
2015.
NOT ENOUGH JUST TO WORK HARD, WE
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361. 2015.
NOT ENOUGH JUST TO WORK HARD, WE
HAVE TO BE COOL BUT TOUGH, SOFT
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362. NOT ENOUGH JUST TO WORK HARD, WE
HAVE TO BE COOL BUT TOUGH, SOFT
BUT STRONG, A SWEET OLD LADY,
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363. HAVE TO BE COOL BUT TOUGH, SOFT
BUT STRONG, A SWEET OLD LADY,
BUT A SWEET OLD LADY THAT SAYS,
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364. BUT STRONG, A SWEET OLD LADY,
BUT A SWEET OLD LADY THAT SAYS,
"ICE CREAM!"
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365. BUT A SWEET OLD LADY THAT SAYS,
"ICE CREAM!"
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366. "ICE CREAM!"
OKAY, WAIT.
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367. OKAY, WAIT.
HOLD ON, HILLARY.
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368. OKAY, WAIT.
HOLD ON, HILLARY.
EVEN IF YOU BEAT BERNIE SANDERS,
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369. HOLD ON, HILLARY.
EVEN IF YOU BEAT BERNIE SANDERS,
AREN'T YOU WORRIED ABOUT THE
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370. EVEN IF YOU BEAT BERNIE SANDERS,
AREN'T YOU WORRIED ABOUT THE
REPUBLICANS?
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371. AREN'T YOU WORRIED ABOUT THE
REPUBLICANS?
WHO IS THEIR FRONTRUNNER?
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372. REPUBLICANS?
WHO IS THEIR FRONTRUNNER?
I'LL TELL YOU, BUT ONLY IF
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373. WHO IS THEIR FRONTRUNNER?
I'LL TELL YOU, BUT ONLY IF
YOU GRAB ONTO SOMETHING TO BRACE
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374. I'LL TELL YOU, BUT ONLY IF
YOU GRAB ONTO SOMETHING TO BRACE
YOURSELF, BECAUSE YOU'RE GOING
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375. YOU GRAB ONTO SOMETHING TO BRACE
YOURSELF, BECAUSE YOU'RE GOING
TO HIT THE F-ING FLOOR.
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376. YOURSELF, BECAUSE YOU'RE GOING
TO HIT THE F-ING FLOOR.
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377. TO HIT THE F-ING FLOOR.
I'LL BE FINE!
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378. I'LL BE FINE!
JUST TELL ME.
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379. I'LL BE FINE!
JUST TELL ME.
NO, HOLD ONTO SOMETHING.
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380. JUST TELL ME.
NO, HOLD ONTO SOMETHING.
JUST TELL ME!
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381. NO, HOLD ONTO SOMETHING.
JUST TELL ME!
HILLARY!
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382. JUST TELL ME!
HILLARY!
I AM WARNING YOU.
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383. HILLARY!
I AM WARNING YOU.
JUST TELL ME.
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384. I AM WARNING YOU.
JUST TELL ME.
DONALD TRUMP.
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385. JUST TELL ME.
DONALD TRUMP.
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386. DONALD TRUMP.
I TOLD YOU.
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387. I TOLD YOU.
OH, MY GOD, WE'RE GOING TO BE
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388. I TOLD YOU.
OH, MY GOD, WE'RE GOING TO BE
PRESIDENT!
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389. OH, MY GOD, WE'RE GOING TO BE
PRESIDENT!
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390. PRESIDENT!
OH HO, WHAT'S THIS?
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391. OH HO, WHAT'S THIS?
DID YOU BRING SOMEONE ELSE WITH
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392. OH HO, WHAT'S THIS?
DID YOU BRING SOMEONE ELSE WITH
YOU?
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393. DID YOU BRING SOMEONE ELSE WITH
YOU?
LOOKS LIKE I WENT THROUGH
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394. YOU?
LOOKS LIKE I WENT THROUGH
TIME AND SPACE AGAIN.
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395. LOOKS LIKE I WENT THROUGH
TIME AND SPACE AGAIN.
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396. TIME AND SPACE AGAIN.
HELLO, SARAH.
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397. HELLO, SARAH.
WHAT THE HECK?
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398. HELLO, SARAH.
WHAT THE HECK?
I LANDED IN THE BEDROOM OF A
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399. WHAT THE HECK?
I LANDED IN THE BEDROOM OF A
LESBIAN COUPLE.
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400. I LANDED IN THE BEDROOM OF A
LESBIAN COUPLE.
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401. LESBIAN COUPLE.
WE'RE NOT LESBIANS.
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402. WE'RE NOT LESBIANS.
WE'RE HILLARY CLINTONS.
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403. WE'RE NOT LESBIANS.
WE'RE HILLARY CLINTONS.
OH, RIGHT, WE RAN FOR
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404. WE'RE HILLARY CLINTONS.
OH, RIGHT, WE RAN FOR
PRESIDENT TOGETHER.
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405. OH, RIGHT, WE RAN FOR
PRESIDENT TOGETHER.
OH, YOU POOR THING.
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406. PRESIDENT TOGETHER.
OH, YOU POOR THING.
I HEARD THAT AFTER YOU LOST, YOU
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407. OH, YOU POOR THING.
I HEARD THAT AFTER YOU LOST, YOU
HAD TO BECOME A SECRETARY.
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408. I HEARD THAT AFTER YOU LOST, YOU
HAD TO BECOME A SECRETARY.
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409. HAD TO BECOME A SECRETARY.
OF STATE!
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410. OF STATE!
GOSH, THAT WAS A REAL FUN
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411. OF STATE!
GOSH, THAT WAS A REAL FUN
ELECTION.
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412. GOSH, THAT WAS A REAL FUN
ELECTION.
I WAS PAIRED UP WITH THAT CUTE
Copy !req
413. ELECTION.
I WAS PAIRED UP WITH THAT CUTE
LITTLE JOHN McCAIN FELLOW.
Copy !req
414. I WAS PAIRED UP WITH THAT CUTE
LITTLE JOHN McCAIN FELLOW.
MAY HE REST IN PEACE, I'M
Copy !req
415. LITTLE JOHN McCAIN FELLOW.
MAY HE REST IN PEACE, I'M
GUESSING.
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416. MAY HE REST IN PEACE, I'M
GUESSING.
Copy !req
417. GUESSING.
HE'S ALIVE.
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418. HE'S ALIVE.
OH, GOD.
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419. HE'S ALIVE.
OH, GOD.
HE WAS GREAT.
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420. OH, GOD.
HE WAS GREAT.
REMEMBER I — HE HAD THAT REAL
Copy !req
421. HE WAS GREAT.
REMEMBER I — HE HAD THAT REAL
FUNNY SAYING.
Copy !req
422. REMEMBER I — HE HAD THAT REAL
FUNNY SAYING.
AND HE'D SAY, "SARAH, YOU'RE THE
Copy !req
423. FUNNY SAYING.
AND HE'D SAY, "SARAH, YOU'RE THE
WORST THING THAT EVER HAPPENED
Copy !req
424. AND HE'D SAY, "SARAH, YOU'RE THE
WORST THING THAT EVER HAPPENED
TO ME!"
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425. WORST THING THAT EVER HAPPENED
TO ME!"
SARAH, CAN WE FOCUS?
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426. TO ME!"
SARAH, CAN WE FOCUS?
I'M RUNNING FOR PRESIDENT AGAIN,
Copy !req
427. SARAH, CAN WE FOCUS?
I'M RUNNING FOR PRESIDENT AGAIN,
AND I'M GETTING ADVICE FROM THE
Copy !req
428. I'M RUNNING FOR PRESIDENT AGAIN,
AND I'M GETTING ADVICE FROM THE
SMARTEST WOMAN I KNOW.
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429. AND I'M GETTING ADVICE FROM THE
SMARTEST WOMAN I KNOW.
ME.
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430. SMARTEST WOMAN I KNOW.
ME.
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431. ME.
JEEZ, I SHOULD BE THE ONE
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432. JEEZ, I SHOULD BE THE ONE
GIVING YOU ADVICE, BECAUSE IN
Copy !req
433. JEEZ, I SHOULD BE THE ONE
GIVING YOU ADVICE, BECAUSE IN
2008, I GOT A HECK OF A LOT
Copy !req
434. GIVING YOU ADVICE, BECAUSE IN
2008, I GOT A HECK OF A LOT
CLOSER TO THE WHITE HOUSE THAN
Copy !req
435. 2008, I GOT A HECK OF A LOT
CLOSER TO THE WHITE HOUSE THAN
THIS GAL DID.
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436. CLOSER TO THE WHITE HOUSE THAN
THIS GAL DID.
WHY, I —
Copy !req
437. THIS GAL DID.
WHY, I —
NO, NO, NO, NO, NO!
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438. WHY, I —
NO, NO, NO, NO, NO!
Copy !req
439. NO, NO, NO, NO, NO!
HERE'S MY ADVICE.
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440. HERE'S MY ADVICE.
WHAT YOU GOT TO DO IS BELIEVE IN
Copy !req
441. HERE'S MY ADVICE.
WHAT YOU GOT TO DO IS BELIEVE IN
YOUR SPIRIT, BUT ALSO AMERICA,
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442. WHAT YOU GOT TO DO IS BELIEVE IN
YOUR SPIRIT, BUT ALSO AMERICA,
BUT NOT TEACHERS AND THEIR FAT
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443. YOUR SPIRIT, BUT ALSO AMERICA,
BUT NOT TEACHERS AND THEIR FAT
LIBERAL BOOKS.
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444. BUT NOT TEACHERS AND THEIR FAT
LIBERAL BOOKS.
BUT ALSO EVEN WHY WORRY ABOUT
Copy !req
445. LIBERAL BOOKS.
BUT ALSO EVEN WHY WORRY ABOUT
FAST FOOD WAGES AND THEIR STATUS
Copy !req
446. BUT ALSO EVEN WHY WORRY ABOUT
FAST FOOD WAGES AND THEIR STATUS
QUO, WHICH IS ANOTHER LATIN
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447. FAST FOOD WAGES AND THEIR STATUS
QUO, WHICH IS ANOTHER LATIN
WORD, STATUS QUO.
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448. QUO, WHICH IS ANOTHER LATIN
WORD, STATUS QUO.
Copy !req
449. WORD, STATUS QUO.
MEANWHILE, AMERICANS ARE BEING
Copy !req
450. MEANWHILE, AMERICANS ARE BEING
TAKEN FOR A RIDE, AND ALSO THE
Copy !req
451. MEANWHILE, AMERICANS ARE BEING
TAKEN FOR A RIDE, AND ALSO THE
MAN CAN ONLY RIDE YOU WHEN YOUR
Copy !req
452. TAKEN FOR A RIDE, AND ALSO THE
MAN CAN ONLY RIDE YOU WHEN YOUR
BACK IS BENT, SO —
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453. MAN CAN ONLY RIDE YOU WHEN YOUR
BACK IS BENT, SO —
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454. BACK IS BENT, SO —
OKAY, WELL, THANK YOU, SARAH.
Copy !req
455. OKAY, WELL, THANK YOU, SARAH.
YEAH, SHE'LL KEEP THAT IN
Copy !req
456. OKAY, WELL, THANK YOU, SARAH.
YEAH, SHE'LL KEEP THAT IN
MIND.
Copy !req
457. YEAH, SHE'LL KEEP THAT IN
MIND.
ALSO, IF IT GETS TOO HARD,
Copy !req
458. MIND.
ALSO, IF IT GETS TOO HARD,
JUST QUIT.
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459. ALSO, IF IT GETS TOO HARD,
JUST QUIT.
WHO CARES?
Copy !req
460. JUST QUIT.
WHO CARES?
Copy !req
461. WHO CARES?
WHO CARES?
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462. WHO CARES?
HILLARY, WE SHOULD LET YOU
Copy !req
463. HILLARY, WE SHOULD LET YOU
GET BACK TO SOME SLEEP.
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464. HILLARY, WE SHOULD LET YOU
GET BACK TO SOME SLEEP.
I NEED TO GET BACK TO 2008
Copy !req
465. GET BACK TO SOME SLEEP.
I NEED TO GET BACK TO 2008
AND SEND A BUNCH OF E-MAILS.
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466. I NEED TO GET BACK TO 2008
AND SEND A BUNCH OF E-MAILS.
I KNOW WE'RE ALL FROM
Copy !req
467. AND SEND A BUNCH OF E-MAILS.
I KNOW WE'RE ALL FROM
DIFFERENT TIMES, BUT SHOULD WE
Copy !req
468. I KNOW WE'RE ALL FROM
DIFFERENT TIMES, BUT SHOULD WE
TAKE A SEC TO DO THAT THING WE
Copy !req
469. DIFFERENT TIMES, BUT SHOULD WE
TAKE A SEC TO DO THAT THING WE
LOVE TO DO?
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470. TAKE A SEC TO DO THAT THING WE
LOVE TO DO?
LET'S DO IT.
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471. LET'S DO IT.
ON JANUARY 16, WE
Copy !req
472. ON JANUARY 16, WE
RETURN LIVE WITH HOST ADAM
GENTLEMEN — HE'S A PROFESSOR
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473. RETURN LIVE WITH HOST ADAM
GENTLEMEN — HE'S A PROFESSOR
FROM ALEXANDRIA, VIRGINIA.
Copy !req
474. GENTLEMEN — HE'S A PROFESSOR
FROM ALEXANDRIA, VIRGINIA.
HE'S A SOFTWARE ENGINEER FROM
Copy !req
475. FROM ALEXANDRIA, VIRGINIA.
HE'S A SOFTWARE ENGINEER FROM
PALO ALTO, CALIFORNIA.
Copy !req
476. HE'S A SOFTWARE ENGINEER FROM
PALO ALTO, CALIFORNIA.
AND HE'S A FINANCIAL ANALYST IN
Copy !req
477. PALO ALTO, CALIFORNIA.
AND HE'S A FINANCIAL ANALYST IN
BOSTON, MASSACHUSETTS.
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478. AND HE'S A FINANCIAL ANALYST IN
BOSTON, MASSACHUSETTS.
THEY MAY NOT KNOW IT YET, BUT
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479. BOSTON, MASSACHUSETTS.
THEY MAY NOT KNOW IT YET, BUT
THEY'RE ALL GUESTS ON AMERICA'S
Copy !req
480. THEY MAY NOT KNOW IT YET, BUT
THEY'RE ALL GUESTS ON AMERICA'S
FAVORITE NEW SHOW "MEET YOUR
Copy !req
481. THEY'RE ALL GUESTS ON AMERICA'S
FAVORITE NEW SHOW "MEET YOUR
SECOND WIFE."
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482. FAVORITE NEW SHOW "MEET YOUR
SECOND WIFE."
Copy !req
483. SECOND WIFE."
HELLO, AND WELCOME TO "MEET
Copy !req
484. HELLO, AND WELCOME TO "MEET
YOUR SECOND WIFE."
Copy !req
485. HELLO, AND WELCOME TO "MEET
YOUR SECOND WIFE."
WE'RE YOU'RE HOSTS.
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486. YOUR SECOND WIFE."
WE'RE YOU'RE HOSTS.
I'M HELEN WALSH.
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487. WE'RE YOU'RE HOSTS.
I'M HELEN WALSH.
AND I'M TINA FEY.
Copy !req
488. I'M HELEN WALSH.
AND I'M TINA FEY.
AND THIS IS THE ONLY SHOW
Copy !req
489. AND I'M TINA FEY.
AND THIS IS THE ONLY SHOW
WHERE HAPPILY MERRIED MEN GET A
Copy !req
490. AND THIS IS THE ONLY SHOW
WHERE HAPPILY MERRIED MEN GET A
CHANCE TO MEET THE PERSON WHO
Copy !req
491. WHERE HAPPILY MERRIED MEN GET A
CHANCE TO MEET THE PERSON WHO
MAY ONE DAY BECOME YOUR SECOND
Copy !req
492. CHANCE TO MEET THE PERSON WHO
MAY ONE DAY BECOME YOUR SECOND
WIFE.
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493. MAY ONE DAY BECOME YOUR SECOND
WIFE.
YOU GUYS EXCITED?
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494. WIFE.
YOU GUYS EXCITED?
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495. YOU GUYS EXCITED?
GREAT.
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496. GREAT.
LET'S MEET OUR FIRST CONTESTANT,
Copy !req
497. GREAT.
LET'S MEET OUR FIRST CONTESTANT,
BRIAN FROM ALEXANDRIA.
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498. LET'S MEET OUR FIRST CONTESTANT,
BRIAN FROM ALEXANDRIA.
SORRY, WAIT.
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499. BRIAN FROM ALEXANDRIA.
SORRY, WAIT.
WHAT IS THIS SHOW?
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500. SORRY, WAIT.
WHAT IS THIS SHOW?
YOU'LL SEE.
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501. WHAT IS THIS SHOW?
YOU'LL SEE.
NOW, I UNDERSTAND YOUR LOVELY
Copy !req
502. YOU'LL SEE.
NOW, I UNDERSTAND YOUR LOVELY
WIFE SAMANTHA IS IN THE AUDIENCE
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503. NOW, I UNDERSTAND YOUR LOVELY
WIFE SAMANTHA IS IN THE AUDIENCE
TODAY.
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504. WIFE SAMANTHA IS IN THE AUDIENCE
TODAY.
YAY, BRIAN?
Copy !req
505. TODAY.
YAY, BRIAN?
AWE, SHE SEEMS GREAT FOR NOW.
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506. YAY, BRIAN?
AWE, SHE SEEMS GREAT FOR NOW.
BUT BRIAN, LET'S MEET YOUR
Copy !req
507. AWE, SHE SEEMS GREAT FOR NOW.
BUT BRIAN, LET'S MEET YOUR
SECOND WIFE.
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508. SECOND WIFE.
BRIAN, THIS IS HANNAH.
Copy !req
509. BRIAN, THIS IS HANNAH.
HANNAH IS CURRENTLY AN EIGHTH
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510. HANNAH IS CURRENTLY AN EIGHTH
GRADE STUDENT AT WELLINGTON
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511. HANNAH IS CURRENTLY AN EIGHTH
GRADE STUDENT AT WELLINGTON
MIDDLE SCHOOL, BUT ONE DAY YEARS
Copy !req
512. GRADE STUDENT AT WELLINGTON
MIDDLE SCHOOL, BUT ONE DAY YEARS
IN THE FUTURE, SHE WILL BE YOUR
Copy !req
513. MIDDLE SCHOOL, BUT ONE DAY YEARS
IN THE FUTURE, SHE WILL BE YOUR
SECOND WIFE.
Copy !req
514. IN THE FUTURE, SHE WILL BE YOUR
SECOND WIFE.
Copy !req
515. SECOND WIFE.
THAT'S IMPOSSIBLE.
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516. THAT'S IMPOSSIBLE.
I LOVE MY WIFE.
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517. THAT'S IMPOSSIBLE.
I LOVE MY WIFE.
SHE'S SUPPORTED ME WHILE IFLS
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518. I LOVE MY WIFE.
SHE'S SUPPORTED ME WHILE IFLS
WRITING MY NOVEL, SO —
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519. SHE'S SUPPORTED ME WHILE IFLS
WRITING MY NOVEL, SO —
BUT WHAT IF I TOLD YOU IN A
Copy !req
520. WRITING MY NOVEL, SO —
BUT WHAT IF I TOLD YOU IN A
FEW YEARS ONE OF YOUR NOVELS
Copy !req
521. BUT WHAT IF I TOLD YOU IN A
FEW YEARS ONE OF YOUR NOVELS
BECOMES A SURPRISE BEST SELLER.
Copy !req
522. FEW YEARS ONE OF YOUR NOVELS
BECOMES A SURPRISE BEST SELLER.
IT'S EVEN AN OPTION FOR A MOVIE.
Copy !req
523. BECOMES A SURPRISE BEST SELLER.
IT'S EVEN AN OPTION FOR A MOVIE.
OOH THEN YEAH.
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524. IT'S EVEN AN OPTION FOR A MOVIE.
OOH THEN YEAH.
YEAH, NO I GET IT NOW.
Copy !req
525. OOH THEN YEAH.
YEAH, NO I GET IT NOW.
Copy !req
526. YEAH, NO I GET IT NOW.
DO YOU HAVE ANY QUESTIONS FOR
Copy !req
527. DO YOU HAVE ANY QUESTIONS FOR
YOUR SECOND WIFE, BRIAN?
Copy !req
528. DO YOU HAVE ANY QUESTIONS FOR
YOUR SECOND WIFE, BRIAN?
SURE.
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529. YOUR SECOND WIFE, BRIAN?
SURE.
HI.
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530. SURE.
HI.
WHAT KIND OF THINGS ARE YOU
Copy !req
531. HI.
WHAT KIND OF THINGS ARE YOU
INTERESTED IN?
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532. WHAT KIND OF THINGS ARE YOU
INTERESTED IN?
HORSES.
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533. INTERESTED IN?
HORSES.
OH, YEAH.
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534. HORSES.
OH, YEAH.
YEAH, HORSES ARE COOL, YEAH.
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535. OH, YEAH.
YEAH, HORSES ARE COOL, YEAH.
OKAY.
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536. YEAH, HORSES ARE COOL, YEAH.
OKAY.
WELL, I GUESS I'LL SEE YOU AGAIN
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537. OKAY.
WELL, I GUESS I'LL SEE YOU AGAIN
IN 20 YEARS.
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538. WELL, I GUESS I'LL SEE YOU AGAIN
IN 20 YEARS.
ACTUALLY, IT'S SEVEN.
Copy !req
539. IN 20 YEARS.
ACTUALLY, IT'S SEVEN.
Copy !req
540. ACTUALLY, IT'S SEVEN.
UP NEXT IS STEVE FROM PALO ALTO.
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541. UP NEXT IS STEVE FROM PALO ALTO.
EXCITED TO BE HERE, STEVE?
Copy !req
542. UP NEXT IS STEVE FROM PALO ALTO.
EXCITED TO BE HERE, STEVE?
I WAS BEFORE, BUT NOW I'M
Copy !req
543. EXCITED TO BE HERE, STEVE?
I WAS BEFORE, BUT NOW I'M
NOT.
Copy !req
544. I WAS BEFORE, BUT NOW I'M
NOT.
GREAT!
Copy !req
545. NOT.
GREAT!
I UNDERSTAND YOUR WIFE ELAINE IS
Copy !req
546. GREAT!
I UNDERSTAND YOUR WIFE ELAINE IS
ALSO HERE.
Copy !req
547. I UNDERSTAND YOUR WIFE ELAINE IS
ALSO HERE.
YEAH, I THOUGHT THIS WAS A
Copy !req
548. ALSO HERE.
YEAH, I THOUGHT THIS WAS A
HOME MAKEOVER SHOW.
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549. YEAH, I THOUGHT THIS WAS A
HOME MAKEOVER SHOW.
IN A WAY IT IS.
Copy !req
550. HOME MAKEOVER SHOW.
IN A WAY IT IS.
Copy !req
551. IN A WAY IT IS.
OKAY, STEVE, LET'S MEET YOUR
Copy !req
552. OKAY, STEVE, LET'S MEET YOUR
SECOND WIFE.
Copy !req
553. SECOND WIFE.
THIS IS STACY.
Copy !req
554. THIS IS STACY.
OH, NO!
Copy !req
555. OH, NO!
HOW MANY YEARS OLD ARE YOU,
Copy !req
556. HOW MANY YEARS OLD ARE YOU,
STACY?
Copy !req
557. HOW MANY YEARS OLD ARE YOU,
STACY?
OH!
Copy !req
558. STACY?
OH!
THAT IS FIVE FINGERS.
Copy !req
559. OH!
THAT IS FIVE FINGERS.
I BELIEVE SHE'S TRYING TO SAY
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560. THAT IS FIVE FINGERS.
I BELIEVE SHE'S TRYING TO SAY
SHE'S FIVE.
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561. I BELIEVE SHE'S TRYING TO SAY
SHE'S FIVE.
WELL, STACY MAY STILL BE
Copy !req
562. SHE'S FIVE.
WELL, STACY MAY STILL BE
LEARNING HER NUMBERS, BUT ONE
Copy !req
563. WELL, STACY MAY STILL BE
LEARNING HER NUMBERS, BUT ONE
DAY SHE WILL BE YOUR SECOND
Copy !req
564. LEARNING HER NUMBERS, BUT ONE
DAY SHE WILL BE YOUR SECOND
WIFE.
Copy !req
565. DAY SHE WILL BE YOUR SECOND
WIFE.
WHAT'S GOING TO HAPPEN IS
Copy !req
566. WIFE.
WHAT'S GOING TO HAPPEN IS
STACY WILL APPLY FOR AN
Copy !req
567. WHAT'S GOING TO HAPPEN IS
STACY WILL APPLY FOR AN
INTERNSHIP AT YOUR COMPANY.
Copy !req
568. STACY WILL APPLY FOR AN
INTERNSHIP AT YOUR COMPANY.
WHICH SHE WILL HEAR ABOUT
Copy !req
569. INTERNSHIP AT YOUR COMPANY.
WHICH SHE WILL HEAR ABOUT
FROM A COLLEGE ROOMMATE WHO IS
Copy !req
570. WHICH SHE WILL HEAR ABOUT
FROM A COLLEGE ROOMMATE WHO IS
ALSO — YOU GUESSED IT — YOUR
Copy !req
571. FROM A COLLEGE ROOMMATE WHO IS
ALSO — YOU GUESSED IT — YOUR
DAUGHTER.
Copy !req
572. ALSO — YOU GUESSED IT — YOUR
DAUGHTER.
WELL, THAT'S KIND OF NICE,
Copy !req
573. DAUGHTER.
WELL, THAT'S KIND OF NICE,
RIGHT?
Copy !req
574. WELL, THAT'S KIND OF NICE,
RIGHT?
THAT WAY SHE AND MY DAUGHTER CAN
Copy !req
575. RIGHT?
THAT WAY SHE AND MY DAUGHTER CAN
STAY FRIENDS.
Copy !req
576. THAT WAY SHE AND MY DAUGHTER CAN
STAY FRIENDS.
OH, YEAH, YOUR DAUGHTER IS
Copy !req
577. STAY FRIENDS.
OH, YEAH, YOUR DAUGHTER IS
GOING TO LOVE IT.
Copy !req
578. OH, YEAH, YOUR DAUGHTER IS
GOING TO LOVE IT.
Copy !req
579. GOING TO LOVE IT.
YOU KNOW WHAT, THIS IS
Copy !req
580. YOU KNOW WHAT, THIS IS
RIDICULOUS.
Copy !req
581. YOU KNOW WHAT, THIS IS
RIDICULOUS.
I'M NOT LEAVING ELAINE.
Copy !req
582. RIDICULOUS.
I'M NOT LEAVING ELAINE.
YOU'RE RIGHT.
Copy !req
583. I'M NOT LEAVING ELAINE.
YOU'RE RIGHT.
YOU WON'T.
Copy !req
584. YOU'RE RIGHT.
YOU WON'T.
SADLY, ELAINE WILL PASS AWAY IN
Copy !req
585. YOU WON'T.
SADLY, ELAINE WILL PASS AWAY IN
A TRAGIC KAYAKING ACCIDENT.
Copy !req
586. SADLY, ELAINE WILL PASS AWAY IN
A TRAGIC KAYAKING ACCIDENT.
WHAT?
Copy !req
587. A TRAGIC KAYAKING ACCIDENT.
WHAT?
SORRY, ELAINE.
Copy !req
588. WHAT?
SORRY, ELAINE.
WE DON'T MAKE THE FUTURE, WE
Copy !req
589. SORRY, ELAINE.
WE DON'T MAKE THE FUTURE, WE
JUST KNOW IT.
Copy !req
590. WE DON'T MAKE THE FUTURE, WE
JUST KNOW IT.
NEXT UP, WE'VE GOT TOBY FROM
Copy !req
591. JUST KNOW IT.
NEXT UP, WE'VE GOT TOBY FROM
BOSTON.
Copy !req
592. NEXT UP, WE'VE GOT TOBY FROM
BOSTON.
Copy !req
593. BOSTON.
AND TOBY, YOU'RE HERE TONIGHT
Copy !req
594. AND TOBY, YOU'RE HERE TONIGHT
WITH YOUR WIFE OF 20 YEARS,
Copy !req
595. AND TOBY, YOU'RE HERE TONIGHT
WITH YOUR WIFE OF 20 YEARS,
DEANNA.
Copy !req
596. WITH YOUR WIFE OF 20 YEARS,
DEANNA.
THAT'S RIGHT.
Copy !req
597. DEANNA.
THAT'S RIGHT.
HEY, BABY.
Copy !req
598. THAT'S RIGHT.
HEY, BABY.
Copy !req
599. HEY, BABY.
OKAY.
Copy !req
600. OKAY.
TOBY, LET'S MEET YOUR SECOND
Copy !req
601. OKAY.
TOBY, LET'S MEET YOUR SECOND
WIFE.
Copy !req
602. TOBY, LET'S MEET YOUR SECOND
WIFE.
DON'T BE WHITE, DON'T BE
Copy !req
603. WIFE.
DON'T BE WHITE, DON'T BE
WHITE, DON'T BE WHITE, DON'T BE
Copy !req
604. DON'T BE WHITE, DON'T BE
WHITE, DON'T BE WHITE, DON'T BE
WHITE.
Copy !req
605. WHITE.
OH, SON OF A —
Copy !req
606. OH, SON OF A —
YOU ARE A DEAD MAN, TOBY.
TOBY, THIS IS ALICIA.
Copy !req
607. YOU ARE A DEAD MAN, TOBY.
TOBY, THIS IS ALICIA.
SHE IS CURRENTLY A SOPHOMORE AT
Copy !req
608. TOBY, THIS IS ALICIA.
SHE IS CURRENTLY A SOPHOMORE AT
RUTGERS.
Copy !req
609. SHE IS CURRENTLY A SOPHOMORE AT
RUTGERS.
WELL, THAT'S NOT THAT BAD.
Copy !req
610. RUTGERS.
WELL, THAT'S NOT THAT BAD.
I MEAN, THE OTHER ONES WAS
Copy !req
611. WELL, THAT'S NOT THAT BAD.
I MEAN, THE OTHER ONES WAS
YOUNGER, RIGHT?
Copy !req
612. I MEAN, THE OTHER ONES WAS
YOUNGER, RIGHT?
SLOW DOWN.
Copy !req
613. YOUNGER, RIGHT?
SLOW DOWN.
SEE, ALICIA HAS A SERIOUS
Copy !req
614. SLOW DOWN.
SEE, ALICIA HAS A SERIOUS
BOYFRIEND.
Copy !req
615. SEE, ALICIA HAS A SERIOUS
BOYFRIEND.
AND SHE JUST FOUND OUT SHE'S
Copy !req
616. BOYFRIEND.
AND SHE JUST FOUND OUT SHE'S
THREE MONTHS PREGNANT WITH, YOU
Copy !req
617. AND SHE JUST FOUND OUT SHE'S
THREE MONTHS PREGNANT WITH, YOU
GUESSED IT, YOUR SECOND WIFE.
Copy !req
618. THREE MONTHS PREGNANT WITH, YOU
GUESSED IT, YOUR SECOND WIFE.
LET'S SHOW TOBY THE SONOGRAM.
Copy !req
619. GUESSED IT, YOUR SECOND WIFE.
LET'S SHOW TOBY THE SONOGRAM.
Copy !req
620. LET'S SHOW TOBY THE SONOGRAM.
ALREADY A BEAUTY.
Copy !req
621. ALREADY A BEAUTY.
QUICK QUESTION.
Copy !req
622. ALREADY A BEAUTY.
QUICK QUESTION.
DOES THE SHOW PROVIDE OVERNIGHT
Copy !req
623. QUICK QUESTION.
DOES THE SHOW PROVIDE OVERNIGHT
LODGING WHERE I CAN STAY
Copy !req
624. DOES THE SHOW PROVIDE OVERNIGHT
LODGING WHERE I CAN STAY
INDEFINITELY?
Copy !req
625. LODGING WHERE I CAN STAY
INDEFINITELY?
NO, BUT ALL OF TODAY'S
Copy !req
626. INDEFINITELY?
NO, BUT ALL OF TODAY'S
CONTESTANTS ARE GOING HOME WITH
Copy !req
627. NO, BUT ALL OF TODAY'S
CONTESTANTS ARE GOING HOME WITH
A FABULOUS PRIZE, A NEW KAYAK!
Copy !req
628. CONTESTANTS ARE GOING HOME WITH
A FABULOUS PRIZE, A NEW KAYAK!
I KNOW I SHOULDN'T, BUT
Copy !req
629. A FABULOUS PRIZE, A NEW KAYAK!
I KNOW I SHOULDN'T, BUT
THEY'RE SO FUN.
Copy !req
630. I KNOW I SHOULDN'T, BUT
THEY'RE SO FUN.
THAT'S ALL THE TIME WE HAVE
Copy !req
631. THEY'RE SO FUN.
THAT'S ALL THE TIME WE HAVE
TODAY.
Copy !req
632. THAT'S ALL THE TIME WE HAVE
TODAY.
JOIN US NEXT TIME ON —
Copy !req
633. TODAY.
JOIN US NEXT TIME ON —
"MEET YOUR SECOND WIFE."
Copy !req
634. JOIN US NEXT TIME ON —
"MEET YOUR SECOND WIFE."
Copy !req
635. THIS CHRISTMAS, YOU'VE GOT TO
Copy !req
636. THIS CHRISTMAS, YOU'VE GOT TO
GET A HOVERBOARD.
I JUST THINK, AND IT GOES
Copy !req
637. GET A HOVERBOARD.
I JUST THINK, AND IT GOES
WHEREVER I WANT.
Copy !req
638. I JUST THINK, AND IT GOES
WHEREVER I WANT.
OR I COULD DO SWEET SPINS.
Copy !req
639. WHEREVER I WANT.
OR I COULD DO SWEET SPINS.
THEY'RE THE HOTTEST GIFTS OF
Copy !req
640. OR I COULD DO SWEET SPINS.
THEY'RE THE HOTTEST GIFTS OF
THE HOLIDAY SEASON.
Copy !req
641. THEY'RE THE HOTTEST GIFTS OF
THE HOLIDAY SEASON.
AND NOW THEY'RE LITERALLY THE
Copy !req
642. THE HOLIDAY SEASON.
AND NOW THEY'RE LITERALLY THE
HOTTEST BECAUSE THEY ALSO
Copy !req
643. AND NOW THEY'RE LITERALLY THE
HOTTEST BECAUSE THEY ALSO
EXPLODE!
Copy !req
644. HOTTEST BECAUSE THEY ALSO
EXPLODE!
Copy !req
645. EXPLODE!
SICK!
Copy !req
646. SICK!
IT COULD BE PLUGGED IN —
Copy !req
647. SICK!
IT COULD BE PLUGGED IN —
Copy !req
648. IT COULD BE PLUGGED IN —
YOU COULD BE RIDING IT —
Copy !req
649. YOU COULD BE RIDING IT —
OR IT COULD JUST BE SITTING
Copy !req
650. YOU COULD BE RIDING IT —
OR IT COULD JUST BE SITTING
THERE.
Copy !req
651. OR IT COULD JUST BE SITTING
THERE.
Copy !req
652. THERE.
KNEW IT!
Copy !req
653. KNEW IT!
BUT HOW DO THEY EXPLODE SO
Copy !req
654. KNEW IT!
BUT HOW DO THEY EXPLODE SO
WELL?
Copy !req
655. BUT HOW DO THEY EXPLODE SO
WELL?
SIMPLE!
Copy !req
656. WELL?
SIMPLE!
WE TAKE A BATTERY FROM A 90S
Copy !req
657. SIMPLE!
WE TAKE A BATTERY FROM A 90S
CELL PHONE AND MAKE IT POWER A
Copy !req
658. WE TAKE A BATTERY FROM A 90S
CELL PHONE AND MAKE IT POWER A
MOTOR DESIGNED FOR A SMALL CAR.
Copy !req
659. CELL PHONE AND MAKE IT POWER A
MOTOR DESIGNED FOR A SMALL CAR.
AND SINCE HOVERBOARDS ARE BANNED
Copy !req
660. MOTOR DESIGNED FOR A SMALL CAR.
AND SINCE HOVERBOARDS ARE BANNED
FROM STREETS AND SIDEWALKS,
Copy !req
661. AND SINCE HOVERBOARDS ARE BANNED
FROM STREETS AND SIDEWALKS,
THEY'RE PERFECT FOR RIDING IN
Copy !req
662. FROM STREETS AND SIDEWALKS,
THEY'RE PERFECT FOR RIDING IN
YOUR HOUSE.
Copy !req
663. THEY'RE PERFECT FOR RIDING IN
YOUR HOUSE.
OR IN A DIFFERENT ROOM OF YOUR
Copy !req
664. YOUR HOUSE.
OR IN A DIFFERENT ROOM OF YOUR
HOUSE.
Copy !req
665. OR IN A DIFFERENT ROOM OF YOUR
HOUSE.
PLUS, THERE'S NO LAME ASS
Copy !req
666. HOUSE.
PLUS, THERE'S NO LAME ASS
WARRANTY.
Copy !req
667. PLUS, THERE'S NO LAME ASS
WARRANTY.
THERE'S JUST A REALLY DOPE
Copy !req
668. WARRANTY.
THERE'S JUST A REALLY DOPE
WARNING.
Copy !req
669. THERE'S JUST A REALLY DOPE
WARNING.
HEY, LOOK!
Copy !req
670. WARNING.
HEY, LOOK!
EVEN GRANDPA'S GETTING IN ON THE
Copy !req
671. HEY, LOOK!
EVEN GRANDPA'S GETTING IN ON THE
ACTION.
Copy !req
672. EVEN GRANDPA'S GETTING IN ON THE
ACTION.
LOOK AT ME!
Copy !req
673. ACTION.
LOOK AT ME!
I'M DOING IT!
Copy !req
674. LOOK AT ME!
I'M DOING IT!
Copy !req
675. I'M DOING IT!
SO THIS CHRISTMAS GIVE THE
Copy !req
676. SO THIS CHRISTMAS GIVE THE
GIFT THAT SAYS "I HATE WALKING,
Copy !req
677. SO THIS CHRISTMAS GIVE THE
GIFT THAT SAYS "I HATE WALKING,
BUT I LOVE FIRE!"
Copy !req
678. GIFT THAT SAYS "I HATE WALKING,
BUT I LOVE FIRE!"
OH, AND VERY OCCASIONALLY,
Copy !req
679. BUT I LOVE FIRE!"
OH, AND VERY OCCASIONALLY,
HOVERBOARDS MAY ACCELERATE FROM
Copy !req
680. OH, AND VERY OCCASIONALLY,
HOVERBOARDS MAY ACCELERATE FROM
ZERO TO 80 IN FOUR SECONDS.
Copy !req
681. HOVERBOARDS MAY ACCELERATE FROM
ZERO TO 80 IN FOUR SECONDS.
WAIT.
Copy !req
682. ZERO TO 80 IN FOUR SECONDS.
WAIT.
WHAT?
Copy !req
683. WAIT.
WHAT?
Copy !req
684. WHAT?
HOVERBOARDS.
Copy !req
685. HOVERBOARDS.
NO LONGER SOLD AT AMAZON,
Copy !req
686. HOVERBOARDS.
NO LONGER SOLD AT AMAZON,
WALMART, TARGET, AND RADIO
Copy !req
687. NO LONGER SOLD AT AMAZON,
WALMART, TARGET, AND RADIO
SHACK.
Copy !req
688. WALMART, TARGET, AND RADIO
SHACK.
MANUFACTURED BY THE GOOD PEOPLE
Copy !req
689. SHACK.
MANUFACTURED BY THE GOOD PEOPLE
AT KIDS CREW.
Copy !req
690. MANUFACTURED BY THE GOOD PEOPLE
AT KIDS CREW.
KIDS CREW!
Copy !req
691. AT KIDS CREW.
KIDS CREW!
THE SAME PEOPLE WHO BROUGHT
Copy !req
692. KIDS CREW!
THE SAME PEOPLE WHO BROUGHT
YOU PLANE LASERS!
Copy !req
693. THE SAME PEOPLE WHO BROUGHT
YOU PLANE LASERS!
LASERS KIDS CAN SHOOT AT PLANES!
Copy !req
694. YOU PLANE LASERS!
LASERS KIDS CAN SHOOT AT PLANES!
TRY TO BLIND A PILOT.
Copy !req
695. LASERS KIDS CAN SHOOT AT PLANES!
TRY TO BLIND A PILOT.
Copy !req
696. TRY TO BLIND A PILOT.
Copy !req
697. SARAH!
Copy !req
698. SARAH!
COME BACK.
WHY ARE YOU CRYING?
Copy !req
699. COME BACK.
WHY ARE YOU CRYING?
BECAUSE I THINK I'M A
Copy !req
700. WHY ARE YOU CRYING?
BECAUSE I THINK I'M A
TERRIBLE PERSON.
Copy !req
701. BECAUSE I THINK I'M A
TERRIBLE PERSON.
I'M LESBIAN.
Copy !req
702. TERRIBLE PERSON.
I'M LESBIAN.
Copy !req
703. I'M LESBIAN.
LESBIAN?
Copy !req
704. LESBIAN?
IT'S OKAY.
Copy !req
705. LESBIAN?
IT'S OKAY.
I KNEW.
Copy !req
706. IT'S OKAY.
I KNEW.
YOU KNEW?
Copy !req
707. I KNEW.
YOU KNEW?
HOW?
Copy !req
708. YOU KNEW?
HOW?
BECAUSE I'M THE SAME.
Copy !req
709. HOW?
BECAUSE I'M THE SAME.
COULD YOU KISS ME?
Copy !req
710. BECAUSE I'M THE SAME.
COULD YOU KISS ME?
CUT!
Copy !req
711. COULD YOU KISS ME?
CUT!
EXCELLENT WORK, YOU TWO.
Copy !req
712. CUT!
EXCELLENT WORK, YOU TWO.
THAT WAS GREAT.
Copy !req
713. EXCELLENT WORK, YOU TWO.
THAT WAS GREAT.
IT COULDN'T BE BETTER.
Copy !req
714. THAT WAS GREAT.
IT COULDN'T BE BETTER.
ANY NOTES?
Copy !req
715. IT COULDN'T BE BETTER.
ANY NOTES?
IT NEEDS TO BE MUCH BETTER.
Copy !req
716. ANY NOTES?
IT NEEDS TO BE MUCH BETTER.
Copy !req
717. IT NEEDS TO BE MUCH BETTER.
SO HOW DO WE DO THIS?
Copy !req
718. SO HOW DO WE DO THIS?
I KNOW HOW HARD SCENES LIKE THIS
Copy !req
719. SO HOW DO WE DO THIS?
I KNOW HOW HARD SCENES LIKE THIS
CAN BE.
Copy !req
720. I KNOW HOW HARD SCENES LIKE THIS
CAN BE.
I HAD A RECURRING ROLE ON "THE
Copy !req
721. CAN BE.
I HAD A RECURRING ROLE ON "THE
JEFFERSONS" ONCE.
Copy !req
722. I HAD A RECURRING ROLE ON "THE
JEFFERSONS" ONCE.
THE '70s SITCOM?
Copy !req
723. JEFFERSONS" ONCE.
THE '70s SITCOM?
HOW OLD ARE YOU?
Copy !req
724. THE '70s SITCOM?
HOW OLD ARE YOU?
YOU KNOW, I HAD HEARD YOU
Copy !req
725. HOW OLD ARE YOU?
YOU KNOW, I HAD HEARD YOU
WERE A BITCH.
Copy !req
726. YOU KNOW, I HAD HEARD YOU
WERE A BITCH.
Copy !req
727. WERE A BITCH.
AND I LIKE THAT.
Copy !req
728. AND I LIKE THAT.
NO, I DID FIVE SEASONS ON "THE
Copy !req
729. AND I LIKE THAT.
NO, I DID FIVE SEASONS ON "THE
JEFFERSONS" AND THEY REALLY KNEW
Copy !req
730. NO, I DID FIVE SEASONS ON "THE
JEFFERSONS" AND THEY REALLY KNEW
HOW TO NAIL AN EMOTIONAL MOMENT.
Copy !req
731. JEFFERSONS" AND THEY REALLY KNEW
HOW TO NAIL AN EMOTIONAL MOMENT.
CASEY, REMEMBER THE MOVIE WAS
Copy !req
732. HOW TO NAIL AN EMOTIONAL MOMENT.
CASEY, REMEMBER THE MOVIE WAS
SET IN THE '40s, SO WHEN SHE
Copy !req
733. CASEY, REMEMBER THE MOVIE WAS
SET IN THE '40s, SO WHEN SHE
TELLS YOU SHE LIKES WOMEN,
Copy !req
734. SET IN THE '40s, SO WHEN SHE
TELLS YOU SHE LIKES WOMEN,
THAT'S VERY SHOCKING.
Copy !req
735. TELLS YOU SHE LIKES WOMEN,
THAT'S VERY SHOCKING.
WE NEED TO SEE THAT HIT YOU.
Copy !req
736. THAT'S VERY SHOCKING.
WE NEED TO SEE THAT HIT YOU.
REPEAT YOUR LAST LINE.
Copy !req
737. WE NEED TO SEE THAT HIT YOU.
REPEAT YOUR LAST LINE.
SURE.
Copy !req
738. REPEAT YOUR LAST LINE.
SURE.
I'M LESBIAN.
Copy !req
739. SURE.
I'M LESBIAN.
Copy !req
740. I'M LESBIAN.
LESBIAN?
Copy !req
741. LESBIAN?
Copy !req
742. LESBIAN?
DID YOU SEE WHAT I DID THERE?
Copy !req
743. DID YOU SEE WHAT I DID THERE?
YES.
Copy !req
744. DID YOU SEE WHAT I DID THERE?
YES.
BUT THIS IS A DELICATE PERIOD
Copy !req
745. YES.
BUT THIS IS A DELICATE PERIOD
DRAMA.
Copy !req
746. BUT THIS IS A DELICATE PERIOD
DRAMA.
I'M NOT SURE THAT I WOULD GIVE
Copy !req
747. DRAMA.
I'M NOT SURE THAT I WOULD GIVE
IT THAT MUCH.
Copy !req
748. I'M NOT SURE THAT I WOULD GIVE
IT THAT MUCH.
WELL TRUST ME, JUST TRY ONE
Copy !req
749. IT THAT MUCH.
WELL TRUST ME, JUST TRY ONE
LIKE THIS.
Copy !req
750. WELL TRUST ME, JUST TRY ONE
LIKE THIS.
PICTURE THAT YOU ARE
Copy !req
751. LIKE THIS.
PICTURE THAT YOU ARE
WATCHING A VERY FAST TENNIS
Copy !req
752. PICTURE THAT YOU ARE
WATCHING A VERY FAST TENNIS
MATCH AND THEN SUDDENLY THE NET
Copy !req
753. WATCHING A VERY FAST TENNIS
MATCH AND THEN SUDDENLY THE NET
FALLS DOWN, AND YOU WATCH IT GO,
Copy !req
754. MATCH AND THEN SUDDENLY THE NET
FALLS DOWN, AND YOU WATCH IT GO,
AND THEN YOU SAY YOUR LINE,
Copy !req
755. FALLS DOWN, AND YOU WATCH IT GO,
AND THEN YOU SAY YOUR LINE,
LESBIAN!
Copy !req
756. AND THEN YOU SAY YOUR LINE,
LESBIAN!
OKAY, LET'S DO IT.
Copy !req
757. LESBIAN!
OKAY, LET'S DO IT.
SARAH'S DESIRE, SCENE 17,
Copy !req
758. OKAY, LET'S DO IT.
SARAH'S DESIRE, SCENE 17,
TAKE TWO.
Copy !req
759. SARAH'S DESIRE, SCENE 17,
TAKE TWO.
AND, ACTION!
Copy !req
760. TAKE TWO.
AND, ACTION!
SARAH, WHY ARE YOU CRYING?
Copy !req
761. AND, ACTION!
SARAH, WHY ARE YOU CRYING?
BECAUSE I THINK I'M A
Copy !req
762. SARAH, WHY ARE YOU CRYING?
BECAUSE I THINK I'M A
TERRIBLE PERSON.
Copy !req
763. BECAUSE I THINK I'M A
TERRIBLE PERSON.
I'M LESBIAN.
Copy !req
764. TERRIBLE PERSON.
I'M LESBIAN.
Copy !req
765. I'M LESBIAN.
A LESBIAN?
Copy !req
766. A LESBIAN?
Copy !req
767. A LESBIAN?
IT'S OKAY, I KNEW.
Copy !req
768. IT'S OKAY, I KNEW.
CUT!
Copy !req
769. IT'S OKAY, I KNEW.
CUT!
HOW DID THAT FEEL?
Copy !req
770. CUT!
HOW DID THAT FEEL?
WRONG.
Copy !req
771. HOW DID THAT FEEL?
WRONG.
IT LOOKS RIGHT ON CAMERA.
Copy !req
772. WRONG.
IT LOOKS RIGHT ON CAMERA.
JANELLE, YOU CAN DO THIS, TOO.
Copy !req
773. IT LOOKS RIGHT ON CAMERA.
JANELLE, YOU CAN DO THIS, TOO.
WHEN SHE TELLS YOU THAT SHE
Copy !req
774. JANELLE, YOU CAN DO THIS, TOO.
WHEN SHE TELLS YOU THAT SHE
KNOWS THAT IS A BIG SURPRISE.
Copy !req
775. WHEN SHE TELLS YOU THAT SHE
KNOWS THAT IS A BIG SURPRISE.
I THINK IT'S MORE QUIET
Copy !req
776. KNOWS THAT IS A BIG SURPRISE.
I THINK IT'S MORE QUIET
RELIEF.
Copy !req
777. I THINK IT'S MORE QUIET
RELIEF.
NO, NO, NO, QUIET NEVER
Copy !req
778. RELIEF.
NO, NO, NO, QUIET NEVER
WORKS.
Copy !req
779. NO, NO, NO, QUIET NEVER
WORKS.
HERE, TAKE ME.
Copy !req
780. WORKS.
HERE, TAKE ME.
GIVE ME THAT LINE.
Copy !req
781. HERE, TAKE ME.
GIVE ME THAT LINE.
IT'S OKAY.
Copy !req
782. GIVE ME THAT LINE.
IT'S OKAY.
I KNEW.
Copy !req
783. IT'S OKAY.
I KNEW.
Copy !req
784. I KNEW.
YOU KNEW?
Copy !req
785. YOU KNEW?
Copy !req
786. YOU KNEW?
THERE'S NO WAY I'M DOING
Copy !req
787. THERE'S NO WAY I'M DOING
THAT.
Copy !req
788. THERE'S NO WAY I'M DOING
THAT.
I THINK YOU CAN.
Copy !req
789. THAT.
I THINK YOU CAN.
THAT'S WHY I CAST YOU.
Copy !req
790. I THINK YOU CAN.
THAT'S WHY I CAST YOU.
JUST IMAGINE THAT YOU HAVE TEN
Copy !req
791. THAT'S WHY I CAST YOU.
JUST IMAGINE THAT YOU HAVE TEN
HOT TATER TOTS IN YOUR MOUTH,
Copy !req
792. JUST IMAGINE THAT YOU HAVE TEN
HOT TATER TOTS IN YOUR MOUTH,
AND YOU HAVE TO SHAKE THEM OUT,
Copy !req
793. HOT TATER TOTS IN YOUR MOUTH,
AND YOU HAVE TO SHAKE THEM OUT,
AND THEN SAY YOUR LINES.
Copy !req
794. AND YOU HAVE TO SHAKE THEM OUT,
AND THEN SAY YOUR LINES.
I'LL GIVE IT A TRY.
Copy !req
795. AND THEN SAY YOUR LINES.
I'LL GIVE IT A TRY.
SOUND LESS EXCITED.
Copy !req
796. I'LL GIVE IT A TRY.
SOUND LESS EXCITED.
OKAY, LET'S PUT THE TWO
Copy !req
797. SOUND LESS EXCITED.
OKAY, LET'S PUT THE TWO
TOGETHER, SHALL WE?
Copy !req
798. OKAY, LET'S PUT THE TWO
TOGETHER, SHALL WE?
SARAH'S DESIRE, SCENE 17,
Copy !req
799. TOGETHER, SHALL WE?
SARAH'S DESIRE, SCENE 17,
TAKE 3.
Copy !req
800. SARAH'S DESIRE, SCENE 17,
TAKE 3.
ACTION.
Copy !req
801. ACTION.
SARAH, WHY ARE YOU CRYING?
Copy !req
802. SARAH, WHY ARE YOU CRYING?
BECAUSE I'M LESBIAN.
Copy !req
803. BECAUSE I'M LESBIAN.
LESBIAN?
Copy !req
804. LESBIAN?
IT'S OKAY, I KNEW.
Copy !req
805. LESBIAN?
IT'S OKAY, I KNEW.
Copy !req
806. IT'S OKAY, I KNEW.
YOU KNEW?
Copy !req
807. YOU KNEW?
HOW?
Copy !req
808. YOU KNEW?
HOW?
BECAUSE I AM THE SAME.
Copy !req
809. HOW?
BECAUSE I AM THE SAME.
CUT!
Copy !req
810. BECAUSE I AM THE SAME.
CUT!
VERY CLOSE.
Copy !req
811. CUT!
VERY CLOSE.
Copy !req
812. VERY CLOSE.
JANELLE, WHEN CASEY SAYS SHE'S
Copy !req
813. JANELLE, WHEN CASEY SAYS SHE'S
THE SAME, I WANT YOU TO SPIT OUT
Copy !req
814. JANELLE, WHEN CASEY SAYS SHE'S
THE SAME, I WANT YOU TO SPIT OUT
THE COCKTAIL YOU'RE DRINKING.
Copy !req
815. THE SAME, I WANT YOU TO SPIT OUT
THE COCKTAIL YOU'RE DRINKING.
CASEY, WHEN JANELLE SAYS "KISS
Copy !req
816. THE COCKTAIL YOU'RE DRINKING.
CASEY, WHEN JANELLE SAYS "KISS
ME," THAT IS THE BEST NEWS THAT
Copy !req
817. CASEY, WHEN JANELLE SAYS "KISS
ME," THAT IS THE BEST NEWS THAT
YOU'VE HEARD ALL DAY, SO YOU
Copy !req
818. ME," THAT IS THE BEST NEWS THAT
YOU'VE HEARD ALL DAY, SO YOU
NEED TO DO A GEORGE JEFFERSON
Copy !req
819. YOU'VE HEARD ALL DAY, SO YOU
NEED TO DO A GEORGE JEFFERSON
DANCE, OKAY?
Copy !req
820. NEED TO DO A GEORGE JEFFERSON
DANCE, OKAY?
ARE WE GOOD?
Copy !req
821. DANCE, OKAY?
ARE WE GOOD?
NO.
Copy !req
822. ARE WE GOOD?
NO.
LET'S GO!
Copy !req
823. NO.
LET'S GO!
SARAH'S DESIRE, SCENE 17,
Copy !req
824. LET'S GO!
SARAH'S DESIRE, SCENE 17,
TAKE 4.
Copy !req
825. SARAH'S DESIRE, SCENE 17,
TAKE 4.
ACTION!
Copy !req
826. TAKE 4.
ACTION!
I THINK I'M A TERRIBLE
Copy !req
827. ACTION!
I THINK I'M A TERRIBLE
PERSON.
Copy !req
828. I THINK I'M A TERRIBLE
PERSON.
I'M A LESBIAN.
Copy !req
829. PERSON.
I'M A LESBIAN.
Copy !req
830. I'M A LESBIAN.
A LESBIAN?
Copy !req
831. A LESBIAN?
IT'S OKAY, I KNEW.
Copy !req
832. A LESBIAN?
IT'S OKAY, I KNEW.
Copy !req
833. IT'S OKAY, I KNEW.
YOU KNEW?
Copy !req
834. YOU KNEW?
HOW?
Copy !req
835. YOU KNEW?
HOW?
BECAUSE!
Copy !req
836. HOW?
BECAUSE!
I AM THE SAME!
Copy !req
837. BECAUSE!
I AM THE SAME!
Copy !req
838. I AM THE SAME!
COULD YOU KISS ME?
Copy !req
839. COULD YOU KISS ME?
OH, YEAH!
Copy !req
840. COULD YOU KISS ME?
OH, YEAH!
Copy !req
841. OH, YEAH!
CUT!
Copy !req
842. CUT!
GREAT!
Copy !req
843. CUT!
GREAT!
OH, THIS IS SUCH AN IMPORTANT
Copy !req
844. GREAT!
OH, THIS IS SUCH AN IMPORTANT
FILM FOR WOMEN.
Copy !req
845. OH, THIS IS SUCH AN IMPORTANT
FILM FOR WOMEN.
Copy !req
846. FILM FOR WOMEN.
I'M SO GLAD THAT WE ARE TAKING
Copy !req
847. I'M SO GLAD THAT WE ARE TAKING
OUR TIME TO GET IT RIGHT.
Copy !req
848. I'M SO GLAD THAT WE ARE TAKING
OUR TIME TO GET IT RIGHT.
ON THIS NEXT TAKE, I THINK
Copy !req
849. OUR TIME TO GET IT RIGHT.
ON THIS NEXT TAKE, I THINK
THAT — WHERE ARE THEY?
Copy !req
850. ON THIS NEXT TAKE, I THINK
THAT — WHERE ARE THEY?
I DON'T KNOW, THEY LEFT.
Copy !req
851. THAT — WHERE ARE THEY?
I DON'T KNOW, THEY LEFT.
Copy !req
852. I DON'T KNOW, THEY LEFT.
SEE, I CAN DO IT, TOO.
Copy !req
853. SEE, I CAN DO IT, TOO.
IT'S NOT VERY HARD.
Copy !req
854. SEE, I CAN DO IT, TOO.
IT'S NOT VERY HARD.
> LADIES AND GENTLEMEN,
Copy !req
855. IT'S NOT VERY HARD.
> LADIES AND GENTLEMEN,
BRUCE SPRINGSTEEN AND THE E
Copy !req
856. > LADIES AND GENTLEMEN,
BRUCE SPRINGSTEEN AND THE E
STREET BAND!
Copy !req
857. BRUCE SPRINGSTEEN AND THE E
STREET BAND!
Copy !req
858. ♪ HEY GIRL I'M CALLING
Copy !req
859. ALL STATIONS
BLOWING DOWN THE WIDENED NIGHT
I'M SINGING THROUGH THESE
Copy !req
860. I'M SINGING THROUGH THESE
POWER LINES ♪
♪ AND I'M RUNNING ON TIME
Copy !req
861. POWER LINES ♪
♪ AND I'M RUNNING ON TIME
AND FEELING ALRIGHT
Copy !req
862. SKIPPING OVER THE CURVES
IN THE AIR ♪
♪ REACHING TO SEE IF YOU'RE
Copy !req
863. IN THE AIR ♪
♪ REACHING TO SEE IF YOU'RE
OUT THERE
Copy !req
864. OUT THERE
COMING ACROSS YOUR RADIO
STATION
Copy !req
865. STATION
CALLING OUT NATION TO NATION ♪
♪ IF YOU CAN HEAR ME THEN
Copy !req
866. CALLING OUT NATION TO NATION ♪
♪ IF YOU CAN HEAR ME THEN
SAY ALRIGHT
Copy !req
867. MEET ME IN THE CITY TONIGHT ♪
♪ I WAS BUSTED FOR FEELING
Copy !req
868. CHARGED WITH DOING THINGS
I CAN'T EXPLAIN ♪
♪ PICKED UP FOR PAROLE
Copy !req
869. I CAN'T EXPLAIN ♪
♪ PICKED UP FOR PAROLE
VIOLATION
Copy !req
870. LOCKED WITH THE BOYS IN
THE SUBWAY STATION ♪
HANDCUFFED ON THE KILLING FLOOR
Copy !req
871. THE SUBWAY STATION ♪
HANDCUFFED ON THE KILLING FLOOR
TRANSMITTING FROM BEHIND THESE
Copy !req
872. TRANSMITTING FROM BEHIND THESE
JAILHOUSE DOORS ♪
♪ AND IF YOU'RE SICK
Copy !req
873. JAILHOUSE DOORS ♪
♪ AND IF YOU'RE SICK
IF YOU'RE
Copy !req
874. IF YOU'RE
TIRED IF YOU'RE BROKEN
CHECK THE LINE CHECK THE TIME
Copy !req
875. TIRED IF YOU'RE BROKEN
CHECK THE LINE CHECK THE TIME
CHECK THE ACTION
Copy !req
876. CHECK THE ACTION
CHECK THE SCORE ♪
♪ COME AND GET ME IF
Copy !req
877. CHECK THE SCORE ♪
♪ COME AND GET ME IF
I AIN'T RIGHT
Copy !req
878. CITY TONIGHT ♪
♪ EVERYBODY'S LOST IN ROMANCE
Copy !req
879. DO YOU FEEL THE WAY I FEEL OH
I'M JUST SEARCHING GIRL
FOR THE BLOOD FOR THE BONE
Copy !req
880. I'M JUST SEARCHING GIRL
FOR THE BLOOD FOR THE BONE
FOR THE MUSCLE FOR
Copy !req
881. CHARGED WITH DOING THINGS
I CAN'T EXPLAIN ♪
♪ PICKED UP FOR PAROLE
Copy !req
882. I CAN'T EXPLAIN ♪
♪ PICKED UP FOR PAROLE
VIOLATION
Copy !req
883. VIOLATION
LOCKED WITH THE BOYS IN
THE SUBWAY STATION
Copy !req
884. THE SUBWAY STATION
I PUSHED MY WAY THROUGH ♪
♪ THE HEARTENED CROWD
Copy !req
885. I PUSHED MY WAY THROUGH ♪
♪ THE HEARTENED CROWD
I SHOVED MY WAY THROUGH THE
Copy !req
886. I SHOVED MY WAY THROUGH THE
HEARTENED CROWD
PAST THE SIGN SAYING THIS
Copy !req
887. PAST THE SIGN SAYING THIS
IS NOT ALLOWED ♪
♪ THE WAY SOMEONES STANDING
Copy !req
888. IS NOT ALLOWED ♪
♪ THE WAY SOMEONES STANDING
STRAIGHT
Copy !req
889. STRAIGHT
SHOUTING OUT LOUD
HANDCUFFED TO THE JAILHOUSE
Copy !req
890. HANDCUFFED TO THE JAILHOUSE
DOOR ♪
♪ TRANSMITTING FROM THE
Copy !req
891. DOOR ♪
♪ TRANSMITTING FROM THE
GALLOW FLOOR
Copy !req
892. GALLOW FLOOR
AND IF YOU'RE SICK IF YOU'RE
TIRED IF YOU'RE BROKEN
Copy !req
893. TIRED IF YOU'RE BROKEN
CHECK THE LINE ♪
♪ CHECK THE TIME
Copy !req
894. CHECK THE LINE ♪
♪ CHECK THE TIME
CHECK THE ACTION
Copy !req
895. CHECK THE ACTION
CHECK THE SCORE
IF YOU CAN HOLLER THEN
Copy !req
896. IF YOU CAN HOLLER THEN
SAY ALL RIGHT ♪
♪ IF YOU CAN HOLLER THEN
Copy !req
897. SAY ALL RIGHT ♪
♪ IF YOU CAN HOLLER THEN
SAY ALL RIGHT
Copy !req
898. SAY ALL RIGHT
IF YOU CAN HOLLER THEN
SAY ALL RIGHT
Copy !req
899. IF YOU CAN HOLLER THEN
SAY ALL RIGHT
IF YOU CAN HOLLER THEN
Copy !req
900. IF YOU CAN HOLLER THEN
SAY ALL RIGHT ♪
♪ IF YOU CAN HOLLER THEN
Copy !req
901. SAY ALL RIGHT ♪
♪ IF YOU CAN HOLLER THEN
SAY ALL RIGHT
Copy !req
902. MEET ME IN THE CITY TONIGHT ♪
♪ MEET ME IN THE CITY TONIGHT
Copy !req
903. IN THE CITY MEET ME IN THE
CITY TONIGHT ♪
♪ IN THE CITY MEET ME
Copy !req
904. > IT'S "WEEKEND UPDATE" WITH
Copy !req
905. > IT'S "WEEKEND UPDATE" WITH
COLIN JOST AND MICHAEL CHE.
Copy !req
906. COLIN JOST AND MICHAEL CHE.
HELLO, EVERYONE.
Copy !req
907. HELLO, EVERYONE.
WELCOME TO "WEEKEND UPDATE."
Copy !req
908. HELLO, EVERYONE.
WELCOME TO "WEEKEND UPDATE."
I AM MICHAEL CHE.
Copy !req
909. WELCOME TO "WEEKEND UPDATE."
I AM MICHAEL CHE.
I'M COLIN JOST.
Copy !req
910. I AM MICHAEL CHE.
I'M COLIN JOST.
HERE ARES TONIGHT'S TOP STORIES.
Copy !req
911. I'M COLIN JOST.
HERE ARES TONIGHT'S TOP STORIES.
> POLITICAL EXPERTS ARE SAYING
Copy !req
912. HERE ARES TONIGHT'S TOP STORIES.
> POLITICAL EXPERTS ARE SAYING
THAT HILLARY CLINTON'S CAMPAIGN
Copy !req
913. > POLITICAL EXPERTS ARE SAYING
THAT HILLARY CLINTON'S CAMPAIGN
IS HAVING TROUBLE WINNING OVER
Copy !req
914. THAT HILLARY CLINTON'S CAMPAIGN
IS HAVING TROUBLE WINNING OVER
YOUNGER MILLENNIAL VOTERS MAINLY
Copy !req
915. IS HAVING TROUBLE WINNING OVER
YOUNGER MILLENNIAL VOTERS MAINLY
BECAUSE IN POLLS MILLENNIAL KEEP
Copy !req
916. YOUNGER MILLENNIAL VOTERS MAINLY
BECAUSE IN POLLS MILLENNIAL KEEP
CHOOSING THEMSELVES.
Copy !req
917. BECAUSE IN POLLS MILLENNIAL KEEP
CHOOSING THEMSELVES.
Copy !req
918. CHOOSING THEMSELVES.
> HILLARY'S NOW TRYING TO
Copy !req
919. > HILLARY'S NOW TRYING TO
REACH OUT TO MILLENNIALS THOUGH
Copy !req
920. > HILLARY'S NOW TRYING TO
REACH OUT TO MILLENNIALS THOUGH
WITH HER NEW CAMPAIGN "NETFLIX
Copy !req
921. REACH OUT TO MILLENNIALS THOUGH
WITH HER NEW CAMPAIGN "NETFLIX
AND HILL."
Copy !req
922. WITH HER NEW CAMPAIGN "NETFLIX
AND HILL."
Copy !req
923. AND HILL."
> BERNIE SANDERS CAMPAIGN ON
Copy !req
924. > BERNIE SANDERS CAMPAIGN ON
FRIDAY CLASHED WITH THE
Copy !req
925. > BERNIE SANDERS CAMPAIGN ON
FRIDAY CLASHED WITH THE
> AT THE GOP DEBATE
Copy !req
926. FRIDAY CLASHED WITH THE
> AT THE GOP DEBATE
CHRIS CHRISTIE CRITICIZED
Copy !req
927. > AT THE GOP DEBATE
CHRIS CHRISTIE CRITICIZED
PRESIDENT OBAMA CALLING HIM A,
Copy !req
928. CHRIS CHRISTIE CRITICIZED
PRESIDENT OBAMA CALLING HIM A,
"FECKLESS WEAKLING."
Copy !req
929. PRESIDENT OBAMA CALLING HIM A,
"FECKLESS WEAKLING."
WOAH, SOMEONE GOT A DICTIONARY
Copy !req
930. "FECKLESS WEAKLING."
WOAH, SOMEONE GOT A DICTIONARY
FOR CHRISTMAS.
Copy !req
931. WOAH, SOMEONE GOT A DICTIONARY
FOR CHRISTMAS.
Copy !req
932. FOR CHRISTMAS.
> I HAD TO LOOK THAT ONE UP
Copy !req
933. > I HAD TO LOOK THAT ONE UP
ACTUALLY.
Copy !req
934. > I HAD TO LOOK THAT ONE UP
ACTUALLY.
SO, FECKLESS: INEPT, OR
Copy !req
935. ACTUALLY.
SO, FECKLESS: INEPT, OR
IRRESPONSIBLE.
Copy !req
936. SO, FECKLESS: INEPT, OR
IRRESPONSIBLE.
WELL, LET'S SEE IT USED IN A
Copy !req
937. IRRESPONSIBLE.
WELL, LET'S SEE IT USED IN A
SENTENCE.
Copy !req
938. WELL, LET'S SEE IT USED IN A
SENTENCE.
IT WOULD BE A FECKLESS ATTEMPT
Copy !req
939. SENTENCE.
IT WOULD BE A FECKLESS ATTEMPT
AT REVENGE TO CLOSE THREE LANES
Copy !req
940. IT WOULD BE A FECKLESS ATTEMPT
AT REVENGE TO CLOSE THREE LANES
OF A BRIDGE IN NEW JERSEY.
Copy !req
941. AT REVENGE TO CLOSE THREE LANES
OF A BRIDGE IN NEW JERSEY.
Copy !req
942. OF A BRIDGE IN NEW JERSEY.
GOOD USE.
Copy !req
943. GOOD USE.
> THROUGHOUT THE REPUBLICAN
Copy !req
944. GOOD USE.
> THROUGHOUT THE REPUBLICAN
DEBATE MANY VIEWERS TOOK NOTICE
Copy !req
945. > THROUGHOUT THE REPUBLICAN
DEBATE MANY VIEWERS TOOK NOTICE
OF AN OFF SCREEN COUGH THAT
Copy !req
946. DEBATE MANY VIEWERS TOOK NOTICE
OF AN OFF SCREEN COUGH THAT
REPEATEDLY INTERRUPTED
Copy !req
947. OF AN OFF SCREEN COUGH THAT
REPEATEDLY INTERRUPTED
CANDIDATES' ANSWERS.
Copy !req
948. REPEATEDLY INTERRUPTED
CANDIDATES' ANSWERS.
NO ONE IS EXACTLY SURE WHERE THE
Copy !req
949. CANDIDATES' ANSWERS.
NO ONE IS EXACTLY SURE WHERE THE
COUGH CAME FROM, BUT IT'S NOW
Copy !req
950. NO ONE IS EXACTLY SURE WHERE THE
COUGH CAME FROM, BUT IT'S NOW
POLLING THREE POINTS AHEAD OF
Copy !req
951. COUGH CAME FROM, BUT IT'S NOW
POLLING THREE POINTS AHEAD OF
RAND PAUL.
Copy !req
952. POLLING THREE POINTS AHEAD OF
RAND PAUL.
Copy !req
953. RAND PAUL.
> MARCO RUBIO HAS LAUNCHED A
Copy !req
954. > MARCO RUBIO HAS LAUNCHED A
NEW CAMPAIGN AD AIMED AT
Copy !req
955. > MARCO RUBIO HAS LAUNCHED A
NEW CAMPAIGN AD AIMED AT
TRADITIONAL VALUES VOTERS.
Copy !req
956. NEW CAMPAIGN AD AIMED AT
TRADITIONAL VALUES VOTERS.
SAID TRADITIONAL VALUE VOTERS,
Copy !req
957. TRADITIONAL VALUES VOTERS.
SAID TRADITIONAL VALUE VOTERS,
"RUBIO?
Copy !req
958. SAID TRADITIONAL VALUE VOTERS,
"RUBIO?
WHAT'S THAT LIKE ITALIAN?"
Copy !req
959. "RUBIO?
WHAT'S THAT LIKE ITALIAN?"
Copy !req
960. WHAT'S THAT LIKE ITALIAN?"
> WELL, IT'S ALMOST 2016 AND
Copy !req
961. > WELL, IT'S ALMOST 2016 AND
IT'S TIME TO REFLECT ON WHAT
Copy !req
962. > WELL, IT'S ALMOST 2016 AND
IT'S TIME TO REFLECT ON WHAT
HAPPENED ON SOME OF YOUR
Copy !req
963. IT'S TIME TO REFLECT ON WHAT
HAPPENED ON SOME OF YOUR
FAVORITE SHOWS.
Copy !req
964. HAPPENED ON SOME OF YOUR
FAVORITE SHOWS.
HERE WITH A DAYTIME DRAMA END OF
Copy !req
965. FAVORITE SHOWS.
HERE WITH A DAYTIME DRAMA END OF
THE YEAR WRAP-UP IS SOMEBODY'S
Copy !req
966. HERE WITH A DAYTIME DRAMA END OF
THE YEAR WRAP-UP IS SOMEBODY'S
MOM DEANIE.
Copy !req
967. THE YEAR WRAP-UP IS SOMEBODY'S
MOM DEANIE.
Copy !req
968. MOM DEANIE.
HI.
Copy !req
969. HI.
HOW YOU DOING?
Copy !req
970. HI.
HOW YOU DOING?
HOW ARE YA.
Copy !req
971. HOW YOU DOING?
HOW ARE YA.
HI, DEANIE.
Copy !req
972. HOW ARE YA.
HI, DEANIE.
YEAH, I'M GOOD.
Copy !req
973. HI, DEANIE.
YEAH, I'M GOOD.
HOW ARE YOU?
Copy !req
974. YEAH, I'M GOOD.
HOW ARE YOU?
I'M GOOD, HOW ARE YOU?
Copy !req
975. HOW ARE YOU?
I'M GOOD, HOW ARE YOU?
I'M GOOD.
Copy !req
976. I'M GOOD, HOW ARE YOU?
I'M GOOD.
I LOVE YOUR SWEATER.
Copy !req
977. I'M GOOD.
I LOVE YOUR SWEATER.
GOOD.
Copy !req
978. I LOVE YOUR SWEATER.
GOOD.
THANK YOU.
Copy !req
979. GOOD.
THANK YOU.
I GOT IT AT A GARAGE SALE, BUT I
Copy !req
980. THANK YOU.
I GOT IT AT A GARAGE SALE, BUT I
WASHED IT.
Copy !req
981. I GOT IT AT A GARAGE SALE, BUT I
WASHED IT.
OH, GOOD.
Copy !req
982. WASHED IT.
OH, GOOD.
Copy !req
983. OH, GOOD.
YOU TWO ARE A RIOT, BY THE
Copy !req
984. YOU TWO ARE A RIOT, BY THE
WAY.
Copy !req
985. YOU TWO ARE A RIOT, BY THE
WAY.
THANKS.
Copy !req
986. WAY.
THANKS.
LOVE YA.
Copy !req
987. THANKS.
LOVE YA.
THANKS VERY MUCH.
Copy !req
988. LOVE YA.
THANKS VERY MUCH.
SO HAS THIS BEEN A GOOD YEAR FOR
Copy !req
989. THANKS VERY MUCH.
SO HAS THIS BEEN A GOOD YEAR FOR
YOUR SOAPS?
Copy !req
990. SO HAS THIS BEEN A GOOD YEAR FOR
YOUR SOAPS?
OH, HAVE THEY EVER BEEN
Copy !req
991. YOUR SOAPS?
OH, HAVE THEY EVER BEEN
GETTING GOOD.
Copy !req
992. OH, HAVE THEY EVER BEEN
GETTING GOOD.
YEAH.
Copy !req
993. GETTING GOOD.
YEAH.
OH, MAN.
Copy !req
994. YEAH.
OH, MAN.
UH-HUH.
Copy !req
995. OH, MAN.
UH-HUH.
OKAY, SO, YOU KNOW THE WHAT'S
Copy !req
996. UH-HUH.
OKAY, SO, YOU KNOW THE WHAT'S
HIS NAME OR WHOEVER, YOU KNOW,
Copy !req
997. OKAY, SO, YOU KNOW THE WHAT'S
HIS NAME OR WHOEVER, YOU KNOW,
MUSTACHE, HIRED THE GUY WHO
Copy !req
998. HIS NAME OR WHOEVER, YOU KNOW,
MUSTACHE, HIRED THE GUY WHO
LOOKED LIKE RED'S HUSBAND WHILE
Copy !req
999. MUSTACHE, HIRED THE GUY WHO
LOOKED LIKE RED'S HUSBAND WHILE
PERFECT SKIN WAS TIED TO THE BED
Copy !req
1000. LOOKED LIKE RED'S HUSBAND WHILE
PERFECT SKIN WAS TIED TO THE BED
ON THE BOATHOUSE.
Copy !req
1001. PERFECT SKIN WAS TIED TO THE BED
ON THE BOATHOUSE.
Copy !req
1002. ON THE BOATHOUSE.
I'M SORRY, WHO?
Copy !req
1003. I'M SORRY, WHO?
YEAH.
Copy !req
1004. I'M SORRY, WHO?
YEAH.
SO, SEXPOT GETS INVOLVED WITH
Copy !req
1005. YEAH.
SO, SEXPOT GETS INVOLVED WITH
IT.
Copy !req
1006. SO, SEXPOT GETS INVOLVED WITH
IT.
AND NOW HIS WIFE, DARK HAIR, IS
Copy !req
1007. IT.
AND NOW HIS WIFE, DARK HAIR, IS
GONNA BE SO PISSED OFF, SHE'S
Copy !req
1008. AND NOW HIS WIFE, DARK HAIR, IS
GONNA BE SO PISSED OFF, SHE'S
GONNA KILL MUSTACHE.
Copy !req
1009. GONNA BE SO PISSED OFF, SHE'S
GONNA KILL MUSTACHE.
Copy !req
1010. GONNA KILL MUSTACHE.
WHO IS MUSTACHE?
Copy !req
1011. WHO IS MUSTACHE?
MUSTACHE IS THE RICH ONE, THE
Copy !req
1012. WHO IS MUSTACHE?
MUSTACHE IS THE RICH ONE, THE
ONE WHO OWNS THE FISH CATERER
Copy !req
1013. MUSTACHE IS THE RICH ONE, THE
ONE WHO OWNS THE FISH CATERER
WITH THE KIDS.
Copy !req
1014. ONE WHO OWNS THE FISH CATERER
WITH THE KIDS.
HOTTIE, SEXPOT, AND SKINNY
Copy !req
1015. WITH THE KIDS.
HOTTIE, SEXPOT, AND SKINNY
MINNIE.
Copy !req
1016. HOTTIE, SEXPOT, AND SKINNY
MINNIE.
Copy !req
1017. MINNIE.
AND THEN THERE'S PRISS PANTS WHO
Copy !req
1018. AND THEN THERE'S PRISS PANTS WHO
HAS THE BIG BOOBS.
Copy !req
1019. AND THEN THERE'S PRISS PANTS WHO
HAS THE BIG BOOBS.
Copy !req
1020. HAS THE BIG BOOBS.
YEAH.
Copy !req
1021. YEAH.
AND DO YOU KNOW NAMES OF ANY OF
Copy !req
1022. YEAH.
AND DO YOU KNOW NAMES OF ANY OF
THE CHARACTERS?
Copy !req
1023. AND DO YOU KNOW NAMES OF ANY OF
THE CHARACTERS?
I KIND OF HALF WATCH IT WHILE
Copy !req
1024. THE CHARACTERS?
I KIND OF HALF WATCH IT WHILE
I'M COLORING IN MY ADULT
Copy !req
1025. I KIND OF HALF WATCH IT WHILE
I'M COLORING IN MY ADULT
COLORING BOOK.
Copy !req
1026. I'M COLORING IN MY ADULT
COLORING BOOK.
Copy !req
1027. COLORING BOOK.
IT'S GOOD FOR THE BRAIN.
Copy !req
1028. IT'S GOOD FOR THE BRAIN.
YEAH.
Copy !req
1029. IT'S GOOD FOR THE BRAIN.
YEAH.
WHAT ARE YOU EATING HERE, BY THE
Copy !req
1030. YEAH.
WHAT ARE YOU EATING HERE, BY THE
WAY?
Copy !req
1031. WHAT ARE YOU EATING HERE, BY THE
WAY?
OH, I'VE GOT SOME BAKED
Copy !req
1032. WAY?
OH, I'VE GOT SOME BAKED
SALMON.
Copy !req
1033. OH, I'VE GOT SOME BAKED
SALMON.
MY FAVORITE PARTS ARE THE SKIN
Copy !req
1034. SALMON.
MY FAVORITE PARTS ARE THE SKIN
AND THE GRAY PART ALONG THE
Copy !req
1035. MY FAVORITE PARTS ARE THE SKIN
AND THE GRAY PART ALONG THE
BOTTOM.
Copy !req
1036. AND THE GRAY PART ALONG THE
BOTTOM.
Copy !req
1037. BOTTOM.
Copy !req
1038. GREAT.
Copy !req
1039. GREAT.
REALLY COOL.
Copy !req
1040. GREAT.
REALLY COOL.
I'M SORRY.
Copy !req
1041. REALLY COOL.
I'M SORRY.
IS THE SMELL MAKING YOU HUNGRY?
Copy !req
1042. I'M SORRY.
IS THE SMELL MAKING YOU HUNGRY?
NO, NOT HUNGRY, NO.
Copy !req
1043. IS THE SMELL MAKING YOU HUNGRY?
NO, NOT HUNGRY, NO.
SO, BACK TO THE SOAPS.
Copy !req
1044. NO, NOT HUNGRY, NO.
SO, BACK TO THE SOAPS.
YOU KNOW, I'M AT THE EDGE OF MY
Copy !req
1045. SO, BACK TO THE SOAPS.
YOU KNOW, I'M AT THE EDGE OF MY
SEAT HERE.
Copy !req
1046. YOU KNOW, I'M AT THE EDGE OF MY
SEAT HERE.
LET'S RECAP.
Copy !req
1047. SEAT HERE.
LET'S RECAP.
YEAH.
Copy !req
1048. LET'S RECAP.
YEAH.
OKAY.
Copy !req
1049. YEAH.
OKAY.
SO, NO, BUT GET THIS.
Copy !req
1050. OKAY.
SO, NO, BUT GET THIS.
YEAH.
Copy !req
1051. SO, NO, BUT GET THIS.
YEAH.
SO, BIG BOOBS WAS SUCKING
Copy !req
1052. YEAH.
SO, BIG BOOBS WAS SUCKING
THAT SKYSCRAPER FIRE WITH
Copy !req
1053. SO, BIG BOOBS WAS SUCKING
THAT SKYSCRAPER FIRE WITH
MILITARY DOCTOR WHO HAS THE HOTS
Copy !req
1054. THAT SKYSCRAPER FIRE WITH
MILITARY DOCTOR WHO HAS THE HOTS
FOR BIG BOOBS.
Copy !req
1055. MILITARY DOCTOR WHO HAS THE HOTS
FOR BIG BOOBS.
OKAY.
Copy !req
1056. FOR BIG BOOBS.
OKAY.
NOW, HOW LONG HAVE YOU BEEN
Copy !req
1057. OKAY.
NOW, HOW LONG HAVE YOU BEEN
WATCHING THESE SHOWS?
Copy !req
1058. NOW, HOW LONG HAVE YOU BEEN
WATCHING THESE SHOWS?
EVERY DAY FOR 40 YEARS.
Copy !req
1059. WATCHING THESE SHOWS?
EVERY DAY FOR 40 YEARS.
Copy !req
1060. EVERY DAY FOR 40 YEARS.
AND WHICH ONE DO YOU WATCH?
Copy !req
1061. AND WHICH ONE DO YOU WATCH?
I WATCH THAT ONE BEFORE THE
Copy !req
1062. AND WHICH ONE DO YOU WATCH?
I WATCH THAT ONE BEFORE THE
OTHER ONE.
Copy !req
1063. I WATCH THAT ONE BEFORE THE
OTHER ONE.
Copy !req
1064. OTHER ONE.
IT'S GOT PIANO MUSIC IN THE
Copy !req
1065. IT'S GOT PIANO MUSIC IN THE
BEGINNING.
Copy !req
1066. IT'S GOT PIANO MUSIC IN THE
BEGINNING.
PIANO MUSIC, SO MAYBE "THE
Copy !req
1067. BEGINNING.
PIANO MUSIC, SO MAYBE "THE
YOUNG AND THE RESTLESS"?
Copy !req
1068. PIANO MUSIC, SO MAYBE "THE
YOUNG AND THE RESTLESS"?
SURE.
Copy !req
1069. YOUNG AND THE RESTLESS"?
SURE.
Copy !req
1070. SURE.
WHAT DO YOU THINK'S GONNA
Copy !req
1071. WHAT DO YOU THINK'S GONNA
HAPPEN?
Copy !req
1072. WHAT DO YOU THINK'S GONNA
HAPPEN?
WHAT'S IN STORE FOR THE NEW
Copy !req
1073. HAPPEN?
WHAT'S IN STORE FOR THE NEW
YEAR?
Copy !req
1074. WHAT'S IN STORE FOR THE NEW
YEAR?
OH, I'M GONNA SIT ON MY ASS
Copy !req
1075. YEAR?
OH, I'M GONNA SIT ON MY ASS
FOR ABOUT A MONTH AND THEN I'LL
Copy !req
1076. OH, I'M GONNA SIT ON MY ASS
FOR ABOUT A MONTH AND THEN I'LL
TAKE MY TREE DOWN.
Copy !req
1077. FOR ABOUT A MONTH AND THEN I'LL
TAKE MY TREE DOWN.
NO, I MEAN —
Copy !req
1078. TAKE MY TREE DOWN.
NO, I MEAN —
Copy !req
1079. NO, I MEAN —
I MEAN IN THE SOAPS.
Copy !req
1080. I MEAN IN THE SOAPS.
WHAT'S GONNA HAPPEN IN THE
Copy !req
1081. I MEAN IN THE SOAPS.
WHAT'S GONNA HAPPEN IN THE
SOAPS?
Copy !req
1082. WHAT'S GONNA HAPPEN IN THE
SOAPS?
OH.
Copy !req
1083. SOAPS?
OH.
OKAY.
Copy !req
1084. OH.
OKAY.
IT'S GOING TO GET REALLY GOOD
Copy !req
1085. OKAY.
IT'S GOING TO GET REALLY GOOD
RIGHT BEFORE NEW YEAR'S.
Copy !req
1086. IT'S GOING TO GET REALLY GOOD
RIGHT BEFORE NEW YEAR'S.
I JUST HOPE THEY DON'T CUT
Copy !req
1087. RIGHT BEFORE NEW YEAR'S.
I JUST HOPE THEY DON'T CUT
INTOIT WITH SOME STUPID ELECTION
Copy !req
1088. I JUST HOPE THEY DON'T CUT
INTOIT WITH SOME STUPID ELECTION
NONSENSE BECAUSE COTTON CANDY
Copy !req
1089. INTOIT WITH SOME STUPID ELECTION
NONSENSE BECAUSE COTTON CANDY
HAD SAID SOMETHING RUDE ABOUT
Copy !req
1090. NONSENSE BECAUSE COTTON CANDY
HAD SAID SOMETHING RUDE ABOUT
GEPPETTO OR BLOW JOB IN THE
Copy !req
1091. HAD SAID SOMETHING RUDE ABOUT
GEPPETTO OR BLOW JOB IN THE
WHITE HOUSE'S WIFE.
Copy !req
1092. GEPPETTO OR BLOW JOB IN THE
WHITE HOUSE'S WIFE.
Copy !req
1093. WHITE HOUSE'S WIFE.
DEANIE, EVERYONE.
Copy !req
1094. DEANIE, EVERYONE.
> ACTIVISTS ARE UPSET THAT THE
Copy !req
1095. > ACTIVISTS ARE UPSET THAT THE
NAVY HAS NAMED A NEW COMBAT SHIP
Copy !req
1096. > ACTIVISTS ARE UPSET THAT THE
NAVY HAS NAMED A NEW COMBAT SHIP
AFTER PRESIDENT ANDREW JACKSON,
Copy !req
1097. NAVY HAS NAMED A NEW COMBAT SHIP
AFTER PRESIDENT ANDREW JACKSON,
SAYING HE WAS PRO-SLAVERY.
Copy !req
1098. AFTER PRESIDENT ANDREW JACKSON,
SAYING HE WAS PRO-SLAVERY.
YEAH, BUT SO WERE SHIP.
Copy !req
1099. SAYING HE WAS PRO-SLAVERY.
YEAH, BUT SO WERE SHIP.
Copy !req
1100. YEAH, BUT SO WERE SHIP.
> BILL MAHER IS ACTUALLY A
Copy !req
1101. > BILL MAHER IS ACTUALLY A
DISTANT COUSIN.
Copy !req
1102. > BILL MAHER IS ACTUALLY A
DISTANT COUSIN.
HIS ANCESTOR, A SCREAMING
Copy !req
1103. DISTANT COUSIN.
HIS ANCESTOR, A SCREAMING
POTATO.
Copy !req
1104. HIS ANCESTOR, A SCREAMING
POTATO.
> MARTIN SCARELLI HAS ARRESTED
Copy !req
1105. POTATO.
> MARTIN SCARELLI HAS ARRESTED
FOR A PONZI SCHEME.
Copy !req
1106. > MARTIN SCARELLI HAS ARRESTED
FOR A PONZI SCHEME.
CONGRATULATIONS.
Copy !req
1107. FOR A PONZI SCHEME.
CONGRATULATIONS.
IT'S NOT LIKE EVERYONE HAS A
Copy !req
1108. CONGRATULATIONS.
IT'S NOT LIKE EVERYONE HAS A
SECOND CAREER.
Copy !req
1109. IT'S NOT LIKE EVERYONE HAS A
SECOND CAREER.
IT'S REALLY HARD TO BE THE MOST
Copy !req
1110. SECOND CAREER.
IT'S REALLY HARD TO BE THE MOST
HATED MAN IN BOTH FINANCE AND
Copy !req
1111. IT'S REALLY HARD TO BE THE MOST
HATED MAN IN BOTH FINANCE AND
THE PHARMACEUTICAL INDUSTRY.
Copy !req
1112. HATED MAN IN BOTH FINANCE AND
THE PHARMACEUTICAL INDUSTRY.
THAT'S LIKE BEING A LEAD SINGER
Copy !req
1113. THE PHARMACEUTICAL INDUSTRY.
THAT'S LIKE BEING A LEAD SINGER
OF NICKELBACK AND SMASHMOUTH.
Copy !req
1114. THAT'S LIKE BEING A LEAD SINGER
OF NICKELBACK AND SMASHMOUTH.
MARTIN SCARELLI IS A REAL LIFE
Copy !req
1115. OF NICKELBACK AND SMASHMOUTH.
MARTIN SCARELLI IS A REAL LIFE
GRINCH.
Copy !req
1116. MARTIN SCARELLI IS A REAL LIFE
GRINCH.
AND YOU KNOW WHAT?
Copy !req
1117. GRINCH.
AND YOU KNOW WHAT?
MAYBE ONE DAY HIS HEART WILL
Copy !req
1118. AND YOU KNOW WHAT?
MAYBE ONE DAY HIS HEART WILL
GROW THREE SIZES TOO BIG.
Copy !req
1119. MAYBE ONE DAY HIS HEART WILL
GROW THREE SIZES TOO BIG.
AND THEN WE'RE GOING TO BE THERE
Copy !req
1120. GROW THREE SIZES TOO BIG.
AND THEN WE'RE GOING TO BE THERE
FOR HIM.
Copy !req
1121. AND THEN WE'RE GOING TO BE THERE
FOR HIM.
TO JACK UP HIS HEART MEDICINE BY
Copy !req
1122. FOR HIM.
TO JACK UP HIS HEART MEDICINE BY
5000%.
Copy !req
1123. TO JACK UP HIS HEART MEDICINE BY
5000%.
> A 96-FOOT-TALL CHRISTMAS
Copy !req
1124. 5000%.
> A 96-FOOT-TALL CHRISTMAS
TREE IN CALIFORNIA WAS DESTROYED
Copy !req
1125. > A 96-FOOT-TALL CHRISTMAS
TREE IN CALIFORNIA WAS DESTROYED
WHEN IT WAS ENGULFED IN FLAMES.
Copy !req
1126. TREE IN CALIFORNIA WAS DESTROYED
WHEN IT WAS ENGULFED IN FLAMES.
AUTHORITIES SUSPECT ARSON AND
Copy !req
1127. WHEN IT WAS ENGULFED IN FLAMES.
AUTHORITIES SUSPECT ARSON AND
ARE ON THE LOOKOUT FOR THIS
Copy !req
1128. AUTHORITIES SUSPECT ARSON AND
ARE ON THE LOOKOUT FOR THIS
SUSPECT.
Copy !req
1129. ARE ON THE LOOKOUT FOR THIS
SUSPECT.
Copy !req
1130. SUSPECT.
> NEXT WEEK IS THE HOLIDAY OF
Copy !req
1131. > NEXT WEEK IS THE HOLIDAY OF
KWANZA, AND IT'S ONLY CELEBRATED
Copy !req
1132. > NEXT WEEK IS THE HOLIDAY OF
KWANZA, AND IT'S ONLY CELEBRATED
BY McDONALD'S.
Copy !req
1133. KWANZA, AND IT'S ONLY CELEBRATED
BY McDONALD'S.
IT STARTS ON DECEMBER 26.
Copy !req
1134. BY McDONALD'S.
IT STARTS ON DECEMBER 26.
YOU CAN'T FOLLOW CHRISTMAS WITH
Copy !req
1135. IT STARTS ON DECEMBER 26.
YOU CAN'T FOLLOW CHRISTMAS WITH
A WORST CHRISTMAS.
Copy !req
1136. YOU CAN'T FOLLOW CHRISTMAS WITH
A WORST CHRISTMAS.
THAT'S LIKE AT THE END OF A
Copy !req
1137. A WORST CHRISTMAS.
THAT'S LIKE AT THE END OF A
BEYONCE CONCERT SHE GOES, "AND
Copy !req
1138. THAT'S LIKE AT THE END OF A
BEYONCE CONCERT SHE GOES, "AND
LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, FERGIE."
Copy !req
1139. BEYONCE CONCERT SHE GOES, "AND
LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, FERGIE."
> A CHURCH IN GERMANY WILL
Copy !req
1140. LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, FERGIE."
> A CHURCH IN GERMANY WILL
HOST A "STAR WARS" THEME SERVICE
Copy !req
1141. > A CHURCH IN GERMANY WILL
HOST A "STAR WARS" THEME SERVICE
ON SUNDAY THAT WILL HIGHLIGHT
Copy !req
1142. HOST A "STAR WARS" THEME SERVICE
ON SUNDAY THAT WILL HIGHLIGHT
THE PARALLELS BETWEEN SCRIPTURE
Copy !req
1143. ON SUNDAY THAT WILL HIGHLIGHT
THE PARALLELS BETWEEN SCRIPTURE
AND THE FILM.
Copy !req
1144. THE PARALLELS BETWEEN SCRIPTURE
AND THE FILM.
AND IF YOU HAVEN'T BEEN TO
Copy !req
1145. AND THE FILM.
AND IF YOU HAVEN'T BEEN TO
CHURCH IN A WHILE, SPOIL
Copy !req
1146. AND IF YOU HAVEN'T BEEN TO
CHURCH IN A WHILE, SPOIL
SPOILER ALERT, GOD IS JESUS'
Copy !req
1147. CHURCH IN A WHILE, SPOIL
SPOILER ALERT, GOD IS JESUS'
FATHER.
Copy !req
1148. SPOILER ALERT, GOD IS JESUS'
FATHER.
SPOILER.
Copy !req
1149. FATHER.
SPOILER.
> ZOOKEEPERS IN ENGLAND ARE
Copy !req
1150. SPOILER.
> ZOOKEEPERS IN ENGLAND ARE
SEARCHING FOR A MONKEY WHO LOST
Copy !req
1151. > ZOOKEEPERS IN ENGLAND ARE
SEARCHING FOR A MONKEY WHO LOST
A FIGHT WITH OTHER MONKEYS.
Copy !req
1152. SEARCHING FOR A MONKEY WHO LOST
A FIGHT WITH OTHER MONKEYS.
HE IS WHITE AND GRAY AND ANSWERS
Copy !req
1153. A FIGHT WITH OTHER MONKEYS.
HE IS WHITE AND GRAY AND ANSWERS
TO THE NAME JEB.
Copy !req
1154. HE IS WHITE AND GRAY AND ANSWERS
TO THE NAME JEB.
> IT'S OUR CHRISTMAS SHOW AND
Copy !req
1155. TO THE NAME JEB.
> IT'S OUR CHRISTMAS SHOW AND
WE HAVE A LITTLE SOMETHING
Copy !req
1156. > IT'S OUR CHRISTMAS SHOW AND
WE HAVE A LITTLE SOMETHING
SPECIAL FOR YOU GUYS.
Copy !req
1157. WE HAVE A LITTLE SOMETHING
SPECIAL FOR YOU GUYS.
HERE TO TELL OUR LAST FEW
Copy !req
1158. SPECIAL FOR YOU GUYS.
HERE TO TELL OUR LAST FEW
JOKES FOR 2015, TINA FEY AND AMY
Copy !req
1159. HERE TO TELL OUR LAST FEW
JOKES FOR 2015, TINA FEY AND AMY
POEHLER!
Copy !req
1160. JOKES FOR 2015, TINA FEY AND AMY
POEHLER!
Copy !req
1161. POEHLER!
> PARENTS IN CONNECTICUT WERE
Copy !req
1162. > PARENTS IN CONNECTICUT WERE
UPSET AFTER ELEMENTARY
Copy !req
1163. > PARENTS IN CONNECTICUT WERE
UPSET AFTER ELEMENTARY
SCHOOLTEACHER IN HER CLASS
Copy !req
1164. UPSET AFTER ELEMENTARY
SCHOOLTEACHER IN HER CLASS
CHANGED THE WORDS FROM "SILENT
Copy !req
1165. SCHOOLTEACHER IN HER CLASS
CHANGED THE WORDS FROM "SILENT
NIGHT" TO SOLSTICE NIGHT."
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1166. CHANGED THE WORDS FROM "SILENT
NIGHT" TO SOLSTICE NIGHT."
WORSE, SHE CHANGED VIRGIN MARY
Copy !req
1167. NIGHT" TO SOLSTICE NIGHT."
WORSE, SHE CHANGED VIRGIN MARY
TO OVER THE JEANS MARY.
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1168. WORSE, SHE CHANGED VIRGIN MARY
TO OVER THE JEANS MARY.
> SEX CRIMES ON THE SUBWAY,
Copy !req
1169. TO OVER THE JEANS MARY.
> SEX CRIMES ON THE SUBWAY,
SUCH AS GROPING AND FLASHING,
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1170. > SEX CRIMES ON THE SUBWAY,
SUCH AS GROPING AND FLASHING,
HAVE JUMPED NEARLY 20%.
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1171. SUCH AS GROPING AND FLASHING,
HAVE JUMPED NEARLY 20%.
WHAT CAN I SAY, I HAD A GOOD
Copy !req
1172. HAVE JUMPED NEARLY 20%.
WHAT CAN I SAY, I HAD A GOOD
YEAR.
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1173. WHAT CAN I SAY, I HAD A GOOD
YEAR.
> HAPPY NEW YEAR!
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1174. YEAR.
> HAPPY NEW YEAR!
FOR WEEKEND UPDATE, I'M AMY
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1175. > HAPPY NEW YEAR!
FOR WEEKEND UPDATE, I'M AMY
POEHLER.
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1176. FOR WEEKEND UPDATE, I'M AMY
POEHLER.
I'M TINA FEY.
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1177. POEHLER.
I'M TINA FEY.
I'M COLIN JOST.
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1178. I'M TINA FEY.
I'M COLIN JOST.
AND I'M MICHAEL CHE.
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1179. I'M COLIN JOST.
AND I'M MICHAEL CHE.
THE FOLLOWING IS A
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1180. AND I'M MICHAEL CHE.
THE FOLLOWING IS A
PAID ADVERTISEMENT.
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1181. THE FOLLOWING IS A
PAID ADVERTISEMENT.
HELLO.
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1182. PAID ADVERTISEMENT.
HELLO.
I'M CHAD DOUGLAS.
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1183. HELLO.
I'M CHAD DOUGLAS.
AND I'M VICTORIA DOUGLAS.
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1184. I'M CHAD DOUGLAS.
AND I'M VICTORIA DOUGLAS.
FOR THOSE OF YOU WHO DON'T
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1185. AND I'M VICTORIA DOUGLAS.
FOR THOSE OF YOU WHO DON'T
REMEMBER, MY WIFE AND I HAD A
Copy !req
1186. FOR THOSE OF YOU WHO DON'T
REMEMBER, MY WIFE AND I HAD A
HIT VARIETY SHOW BACK IN THE
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1187. REMEMBER, MY WIFE AND I HAD A
HIT VARIETY SHOW BACK IN THE
'70s.
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1188. HIT VARIETY SHOW BACK IN THE
'70s.
IT WAS CALLED "THE CHAD AND MRS.
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1189. '70s.
IT WAS CALLED "THE CHAD AND MRS.
DOUGLAS SHOW."
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1190. '70s.
IT WAS CALLED "THE CHAD AND MRS.
DOUGLAS SHOW."
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1191. IT WAS CALLED "THE CHAD AND MRS.
DOUGLAS SHOW."
DOUGLAS SHOW."
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1192. IT WAS CALLED "THE CHAD AND MRS.
DOUGLAS SHOW."
DOUGLAS SHOW."
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1193. WE LOVED DOING THAT SHOW, AND
WE EXTRA LOVE HAND-PICKING SOME
OF OUR CHRISTMAS MOMENTS TO
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1194. WE EXTRA LOVE HAND-PICKING SOME
OF OUR CHRISTMAS MOMENTS TO
SHARE WITH YOU THIS HOLIDAY
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1195. OF OUR CHRISTMAS MOMENTS TO
SHARE WITH YOU THIS HOLIDAY
SEASON.
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1196. SHARE WITH YOU THIS HOLIDAY
SEASON.
HERE'S THE MAGNIFICENT LOLA
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1197. SEASON.
HERE'S THE MAGNIFICENT LOLA
FABRE SINGING "THE 12 DAYS OF
Copy !req
1198. HERE'S THE MAGNIFICENT LOLA
FABRE SINGING "THE 12 DAYS OF
CHRISTMAS" AFTER PUTTING 12
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1199. FABRE SINGING "THE 12 DAYS OF
CHRISTMAS" AFTER PUTTING 12
SHOTS OF RUM IN HER EGGNOG.
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1200. CHRISTMAS" AFTER PUTTING 12
SHOTS OF RUM IN HER EGGNOG.
♪ ON THE 12th
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1201. SHOTS OF RUM IN HER EGGNOG.
♪ ON THE 12th
DAY OF CHRISTMAS
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1202. DAY OF CHRISTMAS
MY TRUE LOVE GAVE TO ME ♪
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1203. MY TRUE LOVE GAVE TO ME ♪
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1204. ♪ ON THE THIRD
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1205. ♪ ON THE THIRD
DAY OF CHRISTMAS
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1206. DAY OF CHRISTMAS
MY TRUE LOVE GAVE TO ME ♪
♪ THREE TURTLE DOVES
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1207. MY TRUE LOVE GAVE TO ME ♪
♪ THREE TURTLE DOVES
TWO GOLDEN RINGS
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1208. TWO GOLDEN RINGS
THREE OTHER THINGS ♪
♪ AND A PARTRIDGE
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1209. IN A PEAR TREE ♪
THAT'S A LOT OF WORDS.
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1210. THAT'S A LOT OF WORDS.
HERE HAVE SOME GIFTS
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1211. THAT'S A LOT OF WORDS.
HERE HAVE SOME GIFTS
CHILDREN.
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1212. HERE HAVE SOME GIFTS
CHILDREN.
SORRY FAITH.
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1213. CHILDREN.
SORRY FAITH.
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1214. SORRY FAITH.
HERE YOU GO, YOUNG MAN, THAT'S
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1215. HERE YOU GO, YOUNG MAN, THAT'S
FOR YOU.
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1216. HERE YOU GO, YOUNG MAN, THAT'S
FOR YOU.
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1217. FOR YOU.
OH, EXHAUSTED.
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1218. OH, EXHAUSTED.
♪ ON ANOTHER DAY FOR
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1219. OH, EXHAUSTED.
♪ ON ANOTHER DAY FOR
CHRISTMAS, THE MAYOR
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1220. CHRISTMAS, THE MAYOR
GAVE TO ME ♪
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1221. GAVE TO ME ♪
♪ FIVE GOLDEN RINGS
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1222. ♪ FIVE GOLDEN RINGS
MRS. FEBRAY IS GOING UP ON
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1223. MRS. FEBRAY IS GOING UP ON
THE LYRICS.
IT'S VERY HARD TO DO PROPS AND
Copy !req
1224. THE LYRICS.
IT'S VERY HARD TO DO PROPS AND
WORDS AT THE SAME TIME, KIDS.
Copy !req
1225. IT'S VERY HARD TO DO PROPS AND
WORDS AT THE SAME TIME, KIDS.
KEEP IT TOGETHER, LOLA, BECAUSE
Copy !req
1226. WORDS AT THE SAME TIME, KIDS.
KEEP IT TOGETHER, LOLA, BECAUSE
THIS LIL POT BERET FIVE, SIX,
Copy !req
1227. KEEP IT TOGETHER, LOLA, BECAUSE
THIS LIL POT BERET FIVE, SIX,
SEVEN, EIGHT.
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1228. THIS LIL POT BERET FIVE, SIX,
SEVEN, EIGHT.
AND TOW, AND TOW AND TOW.
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1229. SEVEN, EIGHT.
AND TOW, AND TOW AND TOW.
BACK ON TRACK.
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1230. AND TOW, AND TOW AND TOW.
BACK ON TRACK.
♪ FIVE BUNYAN RINGS
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1231. BACK ON TRACK.
♪ FIVE BUNYAN RINGS
♪ FOUR TWEEZLE DEES
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1232. THREE THRONG DOOS
TWO TOODLE TUDES ♪
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1233. TWO TOODLE TUDES ♪
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1234. BYE.
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1235. BYE.
LOLA CAME ON OUR SHOW MANY,
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1236. BYE.
LOLA CAME ON OUR SHOW MANY,
MANY TIMES.
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1237. LOLA CAME ON OUR SHOW MANY,
MANY TIMES.
LET ME TELL YOU, THAT'S THE BEST
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1238. MANY TIMES.
LET ME TELL YOU, THAT'S THE BEST
SHE EVER DID.
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1239. LET ME TELL YOU, THAT'S THE BEST
SHE EVER DID.
LOLA WAS A GIFTED MESS OF A
Copy !req
1240. SHE EVER DID.
LOLA WAS A GIFTED MESS OF A
WOMAN.
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1241. LOLA WAS A GIFTED MESS OF A
WOMAN.
OUR NEXT CLIP FEATURES A
Copy !req
1242. WOMAN.
OUR NEXT CLIP FEATURES A
DISCO DIVA AND PARTY GIRL NAMED
Copy !req
1243. OUR NEXT CLIP FEATURES A
DISCO DIVA AND PARTY GIRL NAMED
GLORIA WALLACE.
Copy !req
1244. DISCO DIVA AND PARTY GIRL NAMED
GLORIA WALLACE.
AND BOY, DID SHE LOVE THE WHITE
Copy !req
1245. GLORIA WALLACE.
AND BOY, DID SHE LOVE THE WHITE
STUFF.
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1246. AND BOY, DID SHE LOVE THE WHITE
STUFF.
YOU MEAN COCAINE?
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1247. STUFF.
YOU MEAN COCAINE?
GOOD GOD, VICTORIA, SHE NEVER
Copy !req
1248. YOU MEAN COCAINE?
GOOD GOD, VICTORIA, SHE NEVER
SIGNED THE RELEASE.
Copy !req
1249. GOOD GOD, VICTORIA, SHE NEVER
SIGNED THE RELEASE.
BE COOL.
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1250. BE COOL.
♪ OH, THE WEATHER
Copy !req
1251. OUTSIDE IS ♪
LET'S CUT TO THE END.
♪ LET IT SNOW, LET IT
Copy !req
1252. SNOW, LET IT SNOW ♪
ALL RIGHT, HERE WE GO.
LET'S GET OUT OF HERE.
Copy !req
1253. ALL RIGHT, HERE WE GO.
LET'S GET OUT OF HERE.
SOMEBODY CALL JOHNNY.
Copy !req
1254. LET'S GET OUT OF HERE.
SOMEBODY CALL JOHNNY.
I NEED TO GET SOME MORE STUFF.
Copy !req
1255. SOMEBODY CALL JOHNNY.
I NEED TO GET SOME MORE STUFF.
HERE WE GO.
Copy !req
1256. I NEED TO GET SOME MORE STUFF.
HERE WE GO.
I GOT TO GO.
Copy !req
1257. HERE WE GO.
I GOT TO GO.
I GOT A LOT TO DO.
Copy !req
1258. I GOT TO GO.
I GOT A LOT TO DO.
I HAVE A LOT OF GOOD IDEAS TO
Copy !req
1259. I GOT A LOT TO DO.
I HAVE A LOT OF GOOD IDEAS TO
TELL SOMEONE.
Copy !req
1260. I HAVE A LOT OF GOOD IDEAS TO
TELL SOMEONE.
Copy !req
1261. TELL SOMEONE.
I JUST WANT TO SAY WE ALL
Copy !req
1262. I JUST WANT TO SAY WE ALL
MISS GLORIA.
Copy !req
1263. I JUST WANT TO SAY WE ALL
MISS GLORIA.
REMEMBER TO WEAR YOUR SEAT BELT.
Copy !req
1264. MISS GLORIA.
REMEMBER TO WEAR YOUR SEAT BELT.
AND REMEMBER TO CLOSE YOUR
Copy !req
1265. REMEMBER TO WEAR YOUR SEAT BELT.
AND REMEMBER TO CLOSE YOUR
CAR DOOR WHILE YOU'RE DRIVING.
Copy !req
1266. AND REMEMBER TO CLOSE YOUR
CAR DOOR WHILE YOU'RE DRIVING.
THIS NEXT CLIP WAS ALWAYS THE
Copy !req
1267. CAR DOOR WHILE YOU'RE DRIVING.
THIS NEXT CLIP WAS ALWAYS THE
NUMBER ONE FAVORITE FOR ME AND
Copy !req
1268. THIS NEXT CLIP WAS ALWAYS THE
NUMBER ONE FAVORITE FOR ME AND
MY WIFE.
Copy !req
1269. NUMBER ONE FAVORITE FOR ME AND
MY WIFE.
OH.
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1270. MY WIFE.
OH.
WIFE.
Copy !req
1271. OH.
WIFE.
NOT A COMPLIMENT, JUST WHAT
Copy !req
1272. WIFE.
NOT A COMPLIMENT, JUST WHAT
YOU ARE.
Copy !req
1273. NOT A COMPLIMENT, JUST WHAT
YOU ARE.
Copy !req
1274. YOU ARE.
STILL, IT'S SWEET.
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1275. STILL, IT'S SWEET.
SPEAKING OF SWEET, PLEASE
Copy !req
1276. STILL, IT'S SWEET.
SPEAKING OF SWEET, PLEASE
ENJOY THIS NEXT CLIP STARRING
Copy !req
1277. SPEAKING OF SWEET, PLEASE
ENJOY THIS NEXT CLIP STARRING
THE BEAUTIFUL YOUNG ANGIE
Copy !req
1278. ENJOY THIS NEXT CLIP STARRING
THE BEAUTIFUL YOUNG ANGIE
FRANCIS AND A SPECIAL GUEST.
Copy !req
1279. THE BEAUTIFUL YOUNG ANGIE
FRANCIS AND A SPECIAL GUEST.
IT'S A REAL TREAT.
Copy !req
1280. FRANCIS AND A SPECIAL GUEST.
IT'S A REAL TREAT.
♪ I REALLY CAN'T STAY
Copy !req
1281. IT'S A REAL TREAT.
♪ I REALLY CAN'T STAY
♪ BABY IT'S COLD OUTSIDE
Copy !req
1282. THIS DRINK ♪
OH WELL IT'S LIKE A VITAMIN
FOR WHEN YOU BUMMED OUT THE
Copy !req
1283. OH WELL IT'S LIKE A VITAMIN
FOR WHEN YOU BUMMED OUT THE
CAREER OR YOUR ENERGY IS SAPPED
Copy !req
1284. FOR WHEN YOU BUMMED OUT THE
CAREER OR YOUR ENERGY IS SAPPED
THE ALLERGIES OR IS SOMETHING
Copy !req
1285. CAREER OR YOUR ENERGY IS SAPPED
THE ALLERGIES OR IS SOMETHING
THAT MAKES YOU WANT TO SMILE AND
Copy !req
1286. THE ALLERGIES OR IS SOMETHING
THAT MAKES YOU WANT TO SMILE AND
YEAH, SOMETHING'S UP WITH
Copy !req
1287. THAT MAKES YOU WANT TO SMILE AND
YEAH, SOMETHING'S UP WITH
THAT.
Copy !req
1288. YEAH, SOMETHING'S UP WITH
THAT.
WAIT, I WANT TO SHOW YOU MY
Copy !req
1289. THAT.
WAIT, I WANT TO SHOW YOU MY
PENIS.
Copy !req
1290. WAIT, I WANT TO SHOW YOU MY
PENIS.
Copy !req
1291. PENIS.
C
Copy !req
1292. C
YOU KNOW, NOW THAT I'VE SEEN
Copy !req
1293. C
YOU KNOW, NOW THAT I'VE SEEN
ALL THESE CLIPS, ALL WE REALLY
Copy !req
1294. YOU KNOW, NOW THAT I'VE SEEN
ALL THESE CLIPS, ALL WE REALLY
HAVE ARE THREE VERY SHORT AWFUL
Copy !req
1295. ALL THESE CLIPS, ALL WE REALLY
HAVE ARE THREE VERY SHORT AWFUL
THINGS.
Copy !req
1296. HAVE ARE THREE VERY SHORT AWFUL
THINGS.
MAYBE THAT'S WHY THE DVD IS
Copy !req
1297. THINGS.
MAYBE THAT'S WHY THE DVD IS
THIS BIG.
Copy !req
1298. MAYBE THAT'S WHY THE DVD IS
THIS BIG.
HEY, IT STILL WOULD MAKE A
Copy !req
1299. THIS BIG.
HEY, IT STILL WOULD MAKE A
GREAT GIFT FOR SOMEBODY.
Copy !req
1300. HEY, IT STILL WOULD MAKE A
GREAT GIFT FOR SOMEBODY.
YEAH, PROBABLY.
Copy !req
1301. GREAT GIFT FOR SOMEBODY.
YEAH, PROBABLY.
BUT ALL THE MOMENTS ARE IN THE
Copy !req
1302. YEAH, PROBABLY.
BUT ALL THE MOMENTS ARE IN THE
COMMERCIALS.
Copy !req
1303. BUT ALL THE MOMENTS ARE IN THE
COMMERCIALS.
WHAT ARE YOU DOING, DON'T
Copy !req
1304. COMMERCIALS.
WHAT ARE YOU DOING, DON'T
TELL THEM THAT!
Copy !req
1305. WHAT ARE YOU DOING, DON'T
TELL THEM THAT!
> HI, LADIES, I'M TRISHA HOGAN
Copy !req
1306. TELL THEM THAT!
> HI, LADIES, I'M TRISHA HOGAN
FROM
Copy !req
1307. > HI, LADIES, I'M TRISHA HOGAN
FROM
POPNEWSDAILYAFTERSHOWPODCAST.
Copy !req
1308. FROM
POPNEWSDAILYAFTERSHOWPODCAST.
JPEG.
Copy !req
1309. POPNEWSDAILYAFTERSHOWPODCAST.
JPEG.
HI THERE.
Copy !req
1310. JPEG.
HI THERE.
HI.
Copy !req
1311. HI THERE.
HI.
BEING A MOM.
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1312. HI.
BEING A MOM.
TO CHILDREN.
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1313. BEING A MOM.
TO CHILDREN.
HOW DO YOU JUGGLE IT ALL?
Copy !req
1314. TO CHILDREN.
HOW DO YOU JUGGLE IT ALL?
WELL, YOU KNOW, WE JUST HAVE
Copy !req
1315. HOW DO YOU JUGGLE IT ALL?
WELL, YOU KNOW, WE JUST HAVE
A GREAT SQUAD OF PEOPLE WHO HELP
Copy !req
1316. WELL, YOU KNOW, WE JUST HAVE
A GREAT SQUAD OF PEOPLE WHO HELP
US OUT.
Copy !req
1317. A GREAT SQUAD OF PEOPLE WHO HELP
US OUT.
OH YEAH, A SQUAD?
Copy !req
1318. US OUT.
OH YEAH, A SQUAD?
MODELS AND STARLETS THAT WE'RE
Copy !req
1319. OH YEAH, A SQUAD?
MODELS AND STARLETS THAT WE'RE
CHILLIN' WITH.
Copy !req
1320. MODELS AND STARLETS THAT WE'RE
CHILLIN' WITH.
NO, IT'S NOT LIKE THAT.
Copy !req
1321. CHILLIN' WITH.
NO, IT'S NOT LIKE THAT.
DO YOU WANT TO KNOW WHAT IT'S
Copy !req
1322. NO, IT'S NOT LIKE THAT.
DO YOU WANT TO KNOW WHAT IT'S
LIKE.
Copy !req
1323. DO YOU WANT TO KNOW WHAT IT'S
LIKE.
THEN SHUT THE UP AND
Copy !req
1324. LIKE.
THEN SHUT THE UP AND
LISTEN.
Copy !req
1325. THEN SHUT THE UP AND
LISTEN.
Copy !req
1326. IT TAKES A VILLAGE Y'ALL
WE GOT THE BEST LADIES ♪
♪ WE'VE BEEN TOLD THAT
Copy !req
1327. WE ROLL DEEP HEY ♪
♪ OLD WOMAN AT THE DINER
WHO ALWAYS KNOW MY ORDER
Copy !req
1328. WHO ALWAYS KNOW MY ORDER
MY MAMMAGRAM TECHNICIAN ♪
♪ DUDE WHO RETURNED MY
Copy !req
1329. MY MAMMAGRAM TECHNICIAN ♪
♪ DUDE WHO RETURNED MY
WALLET INTACT
Copy !req
1330. WALLET INTACT
♪ HERE'S OUR GYNECOLOGIST
A REAL LIFE GYNECOLOGIST
Copy !req
1331. A REAL LIFE GYNECOLOGIST
WE SHARE A GYNECOLOGIST ♪
♪ SHE'S A HUGE PART
Copy !req
1332. OF OUR SQUAD ♪
I THINK I GET WHAT YOU GUYS
Copy !req
1333. ARE SAYING.
IT'S LIKE - ♪
♪ A QUEEN AIN'T A QUEEN
Copy !req
1334. IT'S LIKE - ♪
♪ A QUEEN AIN'T A QUEEN
CAUSE WE'RE SITTIN
Copy !req
1335. CAUSE WE'RE SITTIN
ON A THRONE ♪
♪ YOU NEED A WHOLE DAMN CREW
Copy !req
1336. SHE CAN'T DO IT ALONE ♪
♪ IT'S THE HELP WE —
SO FRIENDS AND TISK TISK
Copy !req
1337. CARE OF OUR BUSINESS ♪
♪ CANT BE MIA FROM THE PTA
CAUSE YOUR PICKIN UP LETTUCE
Copy !req
1338. CAUSE YOUR PICKIN UP LETTUCE
FROM TRADER JOSES ♪
♪ SLICIN TO DO LISTS
Copy !req
1339. FROM TRADER JOSES ♪
♪ SLICIN TO DO LISTS
LIKE A SAMURAI
Copy !req
1340. A U.T.I ♪
SO YOU GUYS ARE SO, SO DOWN
Copy !req
1341. SO YOU GUYS ARE SO, SO DOWN
TO EARTH.
NO, DON'T MISUNDERSTAND,
Copy !req
1342. TO EARTH.
NO, DON'T MISUNDERSTAND,
BITCH.
Copy !req
1343. NO, DON'T MISUNDERSTAND,
BITCH.
OUR SQUAD, IS A VERITABLE
Copy !req
1344. BITCH.
OUR SQUAD, IS A VERITABLE
WHO'S WHO.
Copy !req
1345. WHO'S WHO.
♪ WE HANIGN WITH GAYLE KING
Copy !req
1346. ROBERT DOWNEY SR
IN FRONT OF AMY SCHUMER ♪
♪ WELL I DID THE SHOW
Copy !req
1347. IN FRONT OF AMY SCHUMER ♪
♪ WELL I DID THE SHOW
SO SHE OWES ME ONE
Copy !req
1348. SO SHE OWES ME ONE
FAVOR ♪
WAIT, IS THIS NOT A CHARITY
Copy !req
1349. FAVOR ♪
WAIT, IS THIS NOT A CHARITY
THING?
Copy !req
1350. WAIT, IS THIS NOT A CHARITY
THING?
IN A WAY.
Copy !req
1351. THING?
IN A WAY.
SORT OF, YEAH.
Copy !req
1352. IN A WAY.
SORT OF, YEAH.
YEAH.
Copy !req
1353. SORT OF, YEAH.
YEAH.
KNOW WHAT, LET'S JUST DO A
Copy !req
1354. YEAH.
KNOW WHAT, LET'S JUST DO A
SLOW MOTION POST APOCALYPTIC
Copy !req
1355. KNOW WHAT, LET'S JUST DO A
SLOW MOTION POST APOCALYPTIC
WALK.
Copy !req
1356. SLOW MOTION POST APOCALYPTIC
WALK.
OKAY.
Copy !req
1357. WALK.
OKAY.
Copy !req
1358. OKAY.
WAIT, WHO ARE WE MAD AT?
Copy !req
1359. WAIT, WHO ARE WE MAD AT?
♪ WE'VE GOTTA BE DOPE CAUSE
Copy !req
1360. IT TAKES A VILLAGE Y'ALL
♪ WE'VE GOT THE BEST LADIES
♪ WE'VE BEEN TOLD THAT
Copy !req
1361. WE ROLL DEEP HEY ♪
OH MY GOD!
Copy !req
1362. OH MY GOD!
GUYS, YOU CANNOT JUST TRIGGER
AN EXPLOSION AND NOT TELL
Copy !req
1363. GUYS, YOU CANNOT JUST TRIGGER
AN EXPLOSION AND NOT TELL
PEOPLE.
Copy !req
1364. AN EXPLOSION AND NOT TELL
PEOPLE.
IT'S A DIFFERENT WORLD NOW,
Copy !req
1365. PEOPLE.
IT'S A DIFFERENT WORLD NOW,
GUYS.
Copy !req
1366. IT'S A DIFFERENT WORLD NOW,
GUYS.
TENSE TIMES, TENSE TIMES.
Copy !req
1367. GUYS.
TENSE TIMES, TENSE TIMES.
OKAY, EVERYONE ALL RIGHT?
Copy !req
1368. TENSE TIMES, TENSE TIMES.
OKAY, EVERYONE ALL RIGHT?
NO.
Copy !req
1369. OKAY, EVERYONE ALL RIGHT?
NO.
YOU ALL RIGHT?
Copy !req
1370. NO.
YOU ALL RIGHT?
NO.
Copy !req
1371. YOU ALL RIGHT?
NO.
I'M SUING EVERYONE HERE.
Copy !req
1372. NO.
I'M SUING EVERYONE HERE.
> ONCE AGAIN,
Copy !req
1373. I'M SUING EVERYONE HERE.
> ONCE AGAIN,
BRUCE SPRINGSTEEN AND THE E
Copy !req
1374. > ONCE AGAIN,
BRUCE SPRINGSTEEN AND THE E
STREET BAND.
Copy !req
1375. BRUCE SPRINGSTEEN AND THE E
STREET BAND.
Copy !req
1376. ♪ YOU BEEN HURT AND YOU'RE
Copy !req
1377. ALL CRIED OUT YOU SAY
YOU WALK DOWN THE STREET
PUSHING PEOPLE OUTTA YOUR WAY
Copy !req
1378. PUSHING PEOPLE OUTTA YOUR WAY
YOU PACKED YOUR BAGS ♪
♪ AND ALL ALONE YOU WANNA RIDE
Copy !req
1379. YOU PACKED YOUR BAGS ♪
♪ AND ALL ALONE YOU WANNA RIDE
YOU DON'T WANT NOTHING
Copy !req
1380. YOU DON'T WANT NOTHING
DON'T NEED NO ONE BY YOUR SIDE
YOU'RE WALKING TOUGH BABY
Copy !req
1381. YOU'RE WALKING TOUGH BABY
BUT YOU'RE WALKING BLIND ♪
♪ TO THE TIES THAT BIND
Copy !req
1382. BUT YOU'RE WALKING BLIND ♪
♪ TO THE TIES THAT BIND
THE TIES THAT BIND
Copy !req
1383. THAT BIND ♪
♪ CHEAP ROMANCE IT'S
Copy !req
1384. YOU DON'T WANT NOTHING
THAT ANYBODY CAN TOUCH ♪
♪ YOU'RE SO AFRAID OF
Copy !req
1385. THAT ANYBODY CAN TOUCH ♪
♪ YOU'RE SO AFRAID OF
BEING SOMEBODY'S FOOL
Copy !req
1386. NOT WALKING TOUGH BABY
NOT WALKING COOL ♪
♪ YOU WALK COOL BUT DARLING
Copy !req
1387. NOT WALKING COOL ♪
♪ YOU WALK COOL BUT DARLING
CAN YOU WALK THE LINE
Copy !req
1388. AND FACE THE TIES THAT BIND
THE TIES THAT BIND ♪
♪ NOW YOU CAN'T BREAK THE
Copy !req
1389. THE TIES THAT BIND ♪
♪ NOW YOU CAN'T BREAK THE
TIES THAT BIND
Copy !req
1390. TIES THAT BIND
I WOULD RATHER FEEL THE HURT
INSIDE YES I WOULD DARLING
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1391. I WOULD RATHER FEEL THE HURT
INSIDE YES I WOULD DARLING
THAN KNOW THE EMPTINESS YOUR
Copy !req
1392. THAN KNOW THE EMPTINESS YOUR
HEART MUST HIDE ♪
♪ YES I WOULD DARLING YES
Copy !req
1393. HEART MUST HIDE ♪
♪ YES I WOULD DARLING YES
I WOULD DARLING
Copy !req
1394. WHO'S GONNA STOP THE RAIN
WHO'LL EASE THE SADNESS
♪ YOU SIT AND WONDER JUST
Copy !req
1395. WHO'LL EASE THE SADNESS
♪ YOU SIT AND WONDER JUST
WHO'S GONNA STOP THE RAIN
Copy !req
1396. WHO'S GONNA STOP THE RAIN
WHO'LL EASE THE SADNESS
WHO'S GONNA QUIET THE PAIN
Copy !req
1397. WHO'S GONNA QUIET THE PAIN
IT'S A LONG DARK HIGHWAY ♪
♪ AND A THIN WHITE LINE
Copy !req
1398. IT'S A LONG DARK HIGHWAY ♪
♪ AND A THIN WHITE LINE
CONNECTING BABY YOUR HEART
Copy !req
1399. CONNECTING BABY YOUR HEART
TO MINE
WE'RE RUNNING NOW BUT
Copy !req
1400. TO MINE
WE'RE RUNNING NOW BUT
DARLIN' WE WILL STAND IN TIME
Copy !req
1401. DARLIN' WE WILL STAND IN TIME
TO FACE THE TIES THAT BIND ♪
♪ THE TIES THAT BIND
Copy !req
1402. TO FACE THE TIES THAT BIND ♪
♪ THE TIES THAT BIND
NOW YOU CAN'T BREAK THE
Copy !req
1403. NOW YOU CAN'T BREAK THE
TIES THAT BIND
YOU CAN'T FORSAKE THE
Copy !req
1404. TIES THAT BIND ♪
Copy !req
1405. ANYWAY, HELLO, WELCOME TO BRONX
STREET.
Copy !req
1406. ANYWAY, HELLO, WELCOME TO BRONX
STREET.
I'M BETTY.
Copy !req
1407. STREET.
I'M BETTY.
I'M JODIE, WELCOME.
Copy !req
1408. I'M BETTY.
I'M JODIE, WELCOME.
YEAH, WE WERE IN THE WRONG
Copy !req
1409. I'M JODIE, WELCOME.
YEAH, WE WERE IN THE WRONG
CHAIRS.
Copy !req
1410. YEAH, WE WERE IN THE WRONG
CHAIRS.
WE MADE A MISTAKE.
Copy !req
1411. CHAIRS.
WE MADE A MISTAKE.
WHO CARES, WHO CARES?
Copy !req
1412. WE MADE A MISTAKE.
WHO CARES, WHO CARES?
NO ONE CARES.
Copy !req
1413. WHO CARES, WHO CARES?
NO ONE CARES.
YOU KNOW WHAT, IT'S CHRISTMAS.
Copy !req
1414. NO ONE CARES.
YOU KNOW WHAT, IT'S CHRISTMAS.
IT'S CHRISTMAS.
Copy !req
1415. YOU KNOW WHAT, IT'S CHRISTMAS.
IT'S CHRISTMAS.
CHEERS.
Copy !req
1416. IT'S CHRISTMAS.
CHEERS.
CHEERS.
Copy !req
1417. CHEERS.
CHEERS.
CHEERS.
Copy !req
1418. CHEERS.
CHEERS.
WAIT, DID YOU PUT ALCOHOL IN
Copy !req
1419. CHEERS.
WAIT, DID YOU PUT ALCOHOL IN
THIS EGGNOG?
Copy !req
1420. WAIT, DID YOU PUT ALCOHOL IN
THIS EGGNOG?
OF COURSE, WHAT DO YOU THINK?
Copy !req
1421. THIS EGGNOG?
OF COURSE, WHAT DO YOU THINK?
I'M NOT HAVING ANY, I GOTTA
Copy !req
1422. OF COURSE, WHAT DO YOU THINK?
I'M NOT HAVING ANY, I GOTTA
DRIVE.
Copy !req
1423. I'M NOT HAVING ANY, I GOTTA
DRIVE.
WE ALL GOTTA DRIVE.
Copy !req
1424. DRIVE.
WE ALL GOTTA DRIVE.
EVERYONE'S DRIVING, IT'S FINE.
Copy !req
1425. WE ALL GOTTA DRIVE.
EVERYONE'S DRIVING, IT'S FINE.
ALL RIGHT, IT'S FINE.
Copy !req
1426. EVERYONE'S DRIVING, IT'S FINE.
ALL RIGHT, IT'S FINE.
WORRY ABOUT YOURSELF.
Copy !req
1427. ALL RIGHT, IT'S FINE.
WORRY ABOUT YOURSELF.
ALL RIGHT, YOU KNOW IT'S
Copy !req
1428. WORRY ABOUT YOURSELF.
ALL RIGHT, YOU KNOW IT'S
CHRISTMAS.
Copy !req
1429. ALL RIGHT, YOU KNOW IT'S
CHRISTMAS.
AND, SO IT'S CHRISTMAS, NOT THAT
Copy !req
1430. CHRISTMAS.
AND, SO IT'S CHRISTMAS, NOT THAT
YOU'S KNOW IT, BECAUSE EVERY
Copy !req
1431. AND, SO IT'S CHRISTMAS, NOT THAT
YOU'S KNOW IT, BECAUSE EVERY
TIME YOU TURN ON THE TV, WHAT DO
Copy !req
1432. YOU'S KNOW IT, BECAUSE EVERY
TIME YOU TURN ON THE TV, WHAT DO
YOU SEE?
Copy !req
1433. TIME YOU TURN ON THE TV, WHAT DO
YOU SEE?
BAD NEWS.
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1434. YOU SEE?
BAD NEWS.
BAD NEWS.
Copy !req
1435. BAD NEWS.
BAD NEWS.
Copy !req
1436. BAD NEWS.
DOOM AND GLOOM, I AM SICK OF IT.
Copy !req
1437. DOOM AND GLOOM, I AM SICK OF IT.
SOMEBODY GETS SHOT, SOMEBODY
Copy !req
1438. DOOM AND GLOOM, I AM SICK OF IT.
SOMEBODY GETS SHOT, SOMEBODY
GETS HURT, THERE IS A PLANE,
Copy !req
1439. SOMEBODY GETS SHOT, SOMEBODY
GETS HURT, THERE IS A PLANE,
THERE'S A TRAIN, THERE'S A
Copy !req
1440. GETS HURT, THERE IS A PLANE,
THERE'S A TRAIN, THERE'S A
THING, A BACKPACK.
Copy !req
1441. THERE'S A TRAIN, THERE'S A
THING, A BACKPACK.
SOMEONE'S LIKE YOUR DINNER, YOU
Copy !req
1442. THING, A BACKPACK.
SOMEONE'S LIKE YOUR DINNER, YOU
JUST SIT, AN OH THEY GOT BLOWED
Copy !req
1443. SOMEONE'S LIKE YOUR DINNER, YOU
JUST SIT, AN OH THEY GOT BLOWED
UP.
Copy !req
1444. JUST SIT, AN OH THEY GOT BLOWED
UP.
NO MORE BAD NEWS.
Copy !req
1445. UP.
NO MORE BAD NEWS.
YEAH, BECAUSE IT'S CHRISTMAS.
Copy !req
1446. NO MORE BAD NEWS.
YEAH, BECAUSE IT'S CHRISTMAS.
YOU THINK YOU GOT SANTA COMING
Copy !req
1447. YEAH, BECAUSE IT'S CHRISTMAS.
YOU THINK YOU GOT SANTA COMING
DOWN THE CHIMNEY, BUT IT'S ISIS.
Copy !req
1448. YOU THINK YOU GOT SANTA COMING
DOWN THE CHIMNEY, BUT IT'S ISIS.
Copy !req
1449. DOWN THE CHIMNEY, BUT IT'S ISIS.
AYE-AYE-ISIS.
Copy !req
1450. AYE-AYE-ISIS.
YEAH, GO SEE "STAR WARS," GO
Copy !req
1451. AYE-AYE-ISIS.
YEAH, GO SEE "STAR WARS," GO
SEE "STAR WARS" OR SOMETHING.
Copy !req
1452. YEAH, GO SEE "STAR WARS," GO
SEE "STAR WARS" OR SOMETHING.
OH, NO, NO, NO, ENOUGH OF THE
Copy !req
1453. SEE "STAR WARS" OR SOMETHING.
OH, NO, NO, NO, ENOUGH OF THE
"STAR WARS."
Copy !req
1454. OH, NO, NO, NO, ENOUGH OF THE
"STAR WARS."
OKAY, I DON'T WANT ANY MORE
Copy !req
1455. "STAR WARS."
OKAY, I DON'T WANT ANY MORE
"STAR WARS."
Copy !req
1456. OKAY, I DON'T WANT ANY MORE
"STAR WARS."
MAY THE FORCE GIVE ME A BREAK
Copy !req
1457. "STAR WARS."
MAY THE FORCE GIVE ME A BREAK
ALREADY.
Copy !req
1458. MAY THE FORCE GIVE ME A BREAK
ALREADY.
Copy !req
1459. ALREADY.
SATURATED!
Copy !req
1460. SATURATED!
EVERYWHERE YOU GO I SEE "STAR
Copy !req
1461. SATURATED!
EVERYWHERE YOU GO I SEE "STAR
WARS" AND YOGURTS AND SUITS AND
Copy !req
1462. EVERYWHERE YOU GO I SEE "STAR
WARS" AND YOGURTS AND SUITS AND
BUSES, AND BACKPACKS AND CANDY
Copy !req
1463. WARS" AND YOGURTS AND SUITS AND
BUSES, AND BACKPACKS AND CANDY
BARS AND SUITS.
Copy !req
1464. BUSES, AND BACKPACKS AND CANDY
BARS AND SUITS.
TOO MUCH.
Copy !req
1465. BARS AND SUITS.
TOO MUCH.
TOO MUCH.
Copy !req
1466. TOO MUCH.
TOO MUCH.
YOU TRY TO ORDER A PIZZA YOU GET
Copy !req
1467. TOO MUCH.
YOU TRY TO ORDER A PIZZA YOU GET
A BOBA FETT.
Copy !req
1468. YOU TRY TO ORDER A PIZZA YOU GET
A BOBA FETT.
Copy !req
1469. A BOBA FETT.
BOBA FETT, MORE LIKE BOBA FAT.
Copy !req
1470. BOBA FETT, MORE LIKE BOBA FAT.
NOT FOR ME.
Copy !req
1471. BOBA FETT, MORE LIKE BOBA FAT.
NOT FOR ME.
NOT FOR ME, YOU KNOW WHY?
Copy !req
1472. NOT FOR ME.
NOT FOR ME, YOU KNOW WHY?
TOO MANY LASERS.
Copy !req
1473. NOT FOR ME, YOU KNOW WHY?
TOO MANY LASERS.
AND CORRIDORS, AND BLEEP BLORPS.
Copy !req
1474. TOO MANY LASERS.
AND CORRIDORS, AND BLEEP BLORPS.
IT'S EXHAUSTING, GROW UP.
Copy !req
1475. AND CORRIDORS, AND BLEEP BLORPS.
IT'S EXHAUSTING, GROW UP.
Copy !req
1476. IT'S EXHAUSTING, GROW UP.
BYT THE WAY, DON'T HAVE A
Copy !req
1477. BYT THE WAY, DON'T HAVE A
GIANT TALKING DOG IN YOUR MOVIE.
Copy !req
1478. BYT THE WAY, DON'T HAVE A
GIANT TALKING DOG IN YOUR MOVIE.
IT'S SO DUMB.
Copy !req
1479. GIANT TALKING DOG IN YOUR MOVIE.
IT'S SO DUMB.
Copy !req
1480. IT'S SO DUMB.
YOU KNOW WHAT THEY CALL HIM?
Copy !req
1481. YOU KNOW WHAT THEY CALL HIM?
THEY CALL HIM A WOOKIE.
Copy !req
1482. YOU KNOW WHAT THEY CALL HIM?
THEY CALL HIM A WOOKIE.
CHEWY.
Copy !req
1483. THEY CALL HIM A WOOKIE.
CHEWY.
CHEWY.
Copy !req
1484. CHEWY.
CHEWY.
CHEWY.
Copy !req
1485. CHEWY.
CHEWY.
I'M THROUGH-Y WITH CHEWY.
Copy !req
1486. CHEWY.
I'M THROUGH-Y WITH CHEWY.
GOOD.
Copy !req
1487. I'M THROUGH-Y WITH CHEWY.
GOOD.
Copy !req
1488. GOOD.
THAT WAS A GOOD ONE.
Copy !req
1489. THAT WAS A GOOD ONE.
YOU KNOW WHY?
Copy !req
1490. THAT WAS A GOOD ONE.
YOU KNOW WHY?
BECAUSE HE'S A WOOKIE.
Copy !req
1491. YOU KNOW WHY?
BECAUSE HE'S A WOOKIE.
HE'S A WOOKIE.
Copy !req
1492. BECAUSE HE'S A WOOKIE.
HE'S A WOOKIE.
A WOOKIE.
Copy !req
1493. HE'S A WOOKIE.
A WOOKIE.
LOOKIE AT ME, WOOKIE.
Copy !req
1494. A WOOKIE.
LOOKIE AT ME, WOOKIE.
NO MORE.
Copy !req
1495. LOOKIE AT ME, WOOKIE.
NO MORE.
Copy !req
1496. NO MORE.
A DOG MAN THAT FLIES A PLANE?
Copy !req
1497. A DOG MAN THAT FLIES A PLANE?
PASS.
Copy !req
1498. A DOG MAN THAT FLIES A PLANE?
PASS.
YEAH, YEAH.
Copy !req
1499. PASS.
YEAH, YEAH.
DO YOU KNOW HOW TO SAY "I'M
Copy !req
1500. YEAH, YEAH.
DO YOU KNOW HOW TO SAY "I'M
SICK OF STAR WARS" IN WOOKIE?
Copy !req
1501. DO YOU KNOW HOW TO SAY "I'M
SICK OF STAR WARS" IN WOOKIE?
Copy !req
1502. SICK OF STAR WARS" IN WOOKIE?
Copy !req
1503. THAT'S TRUE.
Copy !req
1504. THAT'S TRUE.
THE ONLY THING ABOUT SPACE
Copy !req
1505. THAT'S TRUE.
THE ONLY THING ABOUT SPACE
THAT IM INTERESTED IN, IS MORE
Copy !req
1506. THE ONLY THING ABOUT SPACE
THAT IM INTERESTED IN, IS MORE
COUNTER SPACE.
Copy !req
1507. THAT IM INTERESTED IN, IS MORE
COUNTER SPACE.
'CAUSE MY DUMB HUSBAND TAKES IT
Copy !req
1508. COUNTER SPACE.
'CAUSE MY DUMB HUSBAND TAKES IT
UP WITH HIS NUTRI-BULLET.
Copy !req
1509. 'CAUSE MY DUMB HUSBAND TAKES IT
UP WITH HIS NUTRI-BULLET.
UH.
Copy !req
1510. UP WITH HIS NUTRI-BULLET.
UH.
MAKES A SHAKE.
Copy !req
1511. UH.
MAKES A SHAKE.
Copy !req
1512. MAKES A SHAKE.
MY DUMB HUSBAND MADE
Copy !req
1513. MY DUMB HUSBAND MADE
MEATBALLS WITH TOO MUCH GARLIC
Copy !req
1514. MY DUMB HUSBAND MADE
MEATBALLS WITH TOO MUCH GARLIC
IN THEM.
Copy !req
1515. MEATBALLS WITH TOO MUCH GARLIC
IN THEM.
AND WE'RE LAYING IN BED, AND
Copy !req
1516. IN THEM.
AND WE'RE LAYING IN BED, AND
HE'S FARTING IN HIS SLEEP.
Copy !req
1517. AND WE'RE LAYING IN BED, AND
HE'S FARTING IN HIS SLEEP.
I'M BLAMING IT ON THE DOG.
Copy !req
1518. HE'S FARTING IN HIS SLEEP.
I'M BLAMING IT ON THE DOG.
THE DOG LOOKS AT ME SAYS,
Copy !req
1519. I'M BLAMING IT ON THE DOG.
THE DOG LOOKS AT ME SAYS,
HUH-UH.
Copy !req
1520. THE DOG LOOKS AT ME SAYS,
HUH-UH.
IT'S THAT GUY.
Copy !req
1521. HUH-UH.
IT'S THAT GUY.
Copy !req
1522. IT'S THAT GUY.
HUSBANDS ARE SO DUMB.
Copy !req
1523. HUSBANDS ARE SO DUMB.
BUT I LOVE HIM.
Copy !req
1524. HUSBANDS ARE SO DUMB.
BUT I LOVE HIM.
HE FARTS LIKE A DOG.
Copy !req
1525. BUT I LOVE HIM.
HE FARTS LIKE A DOG.
BUT HE MAKES LOVE TO ME
Copy !req
1526. HE FARTS LIKE A DOG.
BUT HE MAKES LOVE TO ME
TENDERLY!
Copy !req
1527. BUT HE MAKES LOVE TO ME
TENDERLY!
OH MY GOD.
Copy !req
1528. TENDERLY!
OH MY GOD.
Copy !req
1529. OH MY GOD.
JODIE.
Copy !req
1530. JODIE.
HE GAVE ME MY FOUR CHILDREN!
Copy !req
1531. JODIE.
HE GAVE ME MY FOUR CHILDREN!
JODIE, PULL IT TOGETHER.
Copy !req
1532. HE GAVE ME MY FOUR CHILDREN!
JODIE, PULL IT TOGETHER.
YOU'RE RIGHT, I'M FINE.
Copy !req
1533. JODIE, PULL IT TOGETHER.
YOU'RE RIGHT, I'M FINE.
I'M FINE.
Copy !req
1534. YOU'RE RIGHT, I'M FINE.
I'M FINE.
ANYWAY, WHO CARES.
Copy !req
1535. I'M FINE.
ANYWAY, WHO CARES.
Copy !req
1536. ANYWAY, WHO CARES.
ALL RIGHT, LET'S BRING OUT
Copy !req
1537. ALL RIGHT, LET'S BRING OUT
OUR FIRST GUEST.
Copy !req
1538. ALL RIGHT, LET'S BRING OUT
OUR FIRST GUEST.
WHO IS IT, WHO?
Copy !req
1539. OUR FIRST GUEST.
WHO IS IT, WHO?
ALL RIGHT, WELL NO ONE WAS
Copy !req
1540. WHO IS IT, WHO?
ALL RIGHT, WELL NO ONE WAS
AVAILABLE BECAUSE OF THE
Copy !req
1541. ALL RIGHT, WELL NO ONE WAS
AVAILABLE BECAUSE OF THE
HOLIDAY, AND ALSO, NO ONE COMES
Copy !req
1542. AVAILABLE BECAUSE OF THE
HOLIDAY, AND ALSO, NO ONE COMES
to OUR SHOW.
Copy !req
1543. HOLIDAY, AND ALSO, NO ONE COMES
to OUR SHOW.
SO, I GOT MY COUSIN KAREN FROM
Copy !req
1544. to OUR SHOW.
SO, I GOT MY COUSIN KAREN FROM
PHILLY.
Copy !req
1545. SO, I GOT MY COUSIN KAREN FROM
PHILLY.
OH, RIGHT, I LIKE HER, SHE'S
Copy !req
1546. PHILLY.
OH, RIGHT, I LIKE HER, SHE'S
CUTE.
Copy !req
1547. OH, RIGHT, I LIKE HER, SHE'S
CUTE.
YEAH, SHE'S VERY CUTE, AND
Copy !req
1548. CUTE.
YEAH, SHE'S VERY CUTE, AND
SHE'S BRINGING HER HOMEMADE
Copy !req
1549. YEAH, SHE'S VERY CUTE, AND
SHE'S BRINGING HER HOMEMADE
CHRISTMAS ORNAMENTS FOR US TO
Copy !req
1550. SHE'S BRINGING HER HOMEMADE
CHRISTMAS ORNAMENTS FOR US TO
LOOK AT.
Copy !req
1551. CHRISTMAS ORNAMENTS FOR US TO
LOOK AT.
OOH.
Copy !req
1552. LOOK AT.
OOH.
SHE SELLS THEM ON ETSY,
Copy !req
1553. OOH.
SHE SELLS THEM ON ETSY,
WHATEVER THAT IS, ALL RIGHT.
Copy !req
1554. SHE SELLS THEM ON ETSY,
WHATEVER THAT IS, ALL RIGHT.
WELCOME, KAREN.
Copy !req
1555. WHATEVER THAT IS, ALL RIGHT.
WELCOME, KAREN.
KAREN, C'MERE.
Copy !req
1556. WELCOME, KAREN.
KAREN, C'MERE.
KAREN.
Copy !req
1557. KAREN.
Copy !req
1558. HOW ARE YOU?
HOW ARE YOU?
Copy !req
1559. HOW ARE YOU?
HOW ARE YOU?
I'M GOOD.
Copy !req
1560. HOW ARE YOU?
I'M GOOD.
GOOD TO SEE YOU, KAREN, HOW
Copy !req
1561. I'M GOOD.
GOOD TO SEE YOU, KAREN, HOW
ARE THINGS DOWN IN PHILLY?
Copy !req
1562. GOOD TO SEE YOU, KAREN, HOW
ARE THINGS DOWN IN PHILLY?
YEAH, IT'S OKAY, YOU KNOW.
Copy !req
1563. ARE THINGS DOWN IN PHILLY?
YEAH, IT'S OKAY, YOU KNOW.
WE JUST GOT SIDE, WE JUST GOT
Copy !req
1564. YEAH, IT'S OKAY, YOU KNOW.
WE JUST GOT SIDE, WE JUST GOT
DONE CLEARING DEAD FALL OUT OF
Copy !req
1565. WE JUST GOT SIDE, WE JUST GOT
DONE CLEARING DEAD FALL OUT OF
MY YARD AND MADE A GANG OF SALT
Copy !req
1566. DONE CLEARING DEAD FALL OUT OF
MY YARD AND MADE A GANG OF SALT
PEPPERS TO TAKE DOWN THE SHORE.
Copy !req
1567. MY YARD AND MADE A GANG OF SALT
PEPPERS TO TAKE DOWN THE SHORE.
MY SON DAVE JUST STARTED ROTC.
Copy !req
1568. PEPPERS TO TAKE DOWN THE SHORE.
MY SON DAVE JUST STARTED ROTC.
HOW ARE YOUS?
Copy !req
1569. MY SON DAVE JUST STARTED ROTC.
HOW ARE YOUS?
OH, MY GOD, KAREN, I FORGOT
Copy !req
1570. HOW ARE YOUS?
OH, MY GOD, KAREN, I FORGOT
WHAT A BEAUTIFUL ACCENT YOU
Copy !req
1571. OH, MY GOD, KAREN, I FORGOT
WHAT A BEAUTIFUL ACCENT YOU
HAVE.
Copy !req
1572. WHAT A BEAUTIFUL ACCENT YOU
HAVE.
Copy !req
1573. HAVE.
YOU SOUND CLASSY.
Copy !req
1574. YOU SOUND CLASSY.
SO CLASSY.
Copy !req
1575. YOU SOUND CLASSY.
SO CLASSY.
DON'T BE STUPID.
Copy !req
1576. SO CLASSY.
DON'T BE STUPID.
KAREN, I HAVE ALWAYS BEEN SO
Copy !req
1577. DON'T BE STUPID.
KAREN, I HAVE ALWAYS BEEN SO
JEALOUS OF THAT ACCENT.
Copy !req
1578. KAREN, I HAVE ALWAYS BEEN SO
JEALOUS OF THAT ACCENT.
AH, I KNOW, I WISH I HAD AN
Copy !req
1579. JEALOUS OF THAT ACCENT.
AH, I KNOW, I WISH I HAD AN
ACCENT.
Copy !req
1580. AH, I KNOW, I WISH I HAD AN
ACCENT.
Copy !req
1581. ACCENT.
I KNOW, WE TALK SO BORING.
Copy !req
1582. I KNOW, WE TALK SO BORING.
ALL RIGHT, SAY MORE THINGS IN
Copy !req
1583. I KNOW, WE TALK SO BORING.
ALL RIGHT, SAY MORE THINGS IN
PHILLY.
Copy !req
1584. ALL RIGHT, SAY MORE THINGS IN
PHILLY.
SAY, UM, SAY THE WORD "WATER."
Copy !req
1585. PHILLY.
SAY, UM, SAY THE WORD "WATER."
WATER.
Copy !req
1586. SAY, UM, SAY THE WORD "WATER."
WATER.
WHAT DID SHE SAY?
Copy !req
1587. WATER.
WHAT DID SHE SAY?
WATER.
Copy !req
1588. WHAT DID SHE SAY?
WATER.
WATER.
Copy !req
1589. WATER.
WATER.
WATER.
Copy !req
1590. WATER.
WATER.
WHAT DID SHE SAY?
Copy !req
1591. WATER.
WHAT DID SHE SAY?
SHE'S SAYING WATER.
Copy !req
1592. WHAT DID SHE SAY?
SHE'S SAYING WATER.
SAY WATER.
Copy !req
1593. SHE'S SAYING WATER.
SAY WATER.
WATER.
Copy !req
1594. SAY WATER.
WATER.
SAY IT LIKE THE REGULAR
Copy !req
1595. WATER.
SAY IT LIKE THE REGULAR
PEOPLE SAY IT, LIKE WATER.
Copy !req
1596. SAY IT LIKE THE REGULAR
PEOPLE SAY IT, LIKE WATER.
WATER.
Copy !req
1597. PEOPLE SAY IT, LIKE WATER.
WATER.
WATER.
Copy !req
1598. WATER.
WATER.
IT'S LIKE DOWNTON ABBEY.
Copy !req
1599. WATER.
IT'S LIKE DOWNTON ABBEY.
IT'S LIKE DOWNTON ABBEY.
Copy !req
1600. IT'S LIKE DOWNTON ABBEY.
IT'S LIKE DOWNTON ABBEY.
WHAT'S NEW IN PHILLY?
Copy !req
1601. IT'S LIKE DOWNTON ABBEY.
WHAT'S NEW IN PHILLY?
WHAT'S NEW IN PHILLY?
Copy !req
1602. WHAT'S NEW IN PHILLY?
WHAT'S NEW IN PHILLY?
YEAH, YOU KNOW, I GOT TO BE
Copy !req
1603. WHAT'S NEW IN PHILLY?
YEAH, YOU KNOW, I GOT TO BE
HONEST, NOT GREAT.
Copy !req
1604. YEAH, YOU KNOW, I GOT TO BE
HONEST, NOT GREAT.
MY BROTHER DAVE AND HIS FRIEND
Copy !req
1605. HONEST, NOT GREAT.
MY BROTHER DAVE AND HIS FRIEND
DAVE AND THEIR OTHER FRIEND
Copy !req
1606. MY BROTHER DAVE AND HIS FRIEND
DAVE AND THEIR OTHER FRIEND
DAVE, THEY SAW A GUY BEATING A
Copy !req
1607. DAVE AND THEIR OTHER FRIEND
DAVE, THEY SAW A GUY BEATING A
SALVATION ARMY SANTA WITH AN OLD
Copy !req
1608. DAVE, THEY SAW A GUY BEATING A
SALVATION ARMY SANTA WITH AN OLD
CAR BATTERY IN A WALMART PARKING
Copy !req
1609. SALVATION ARMY SANTA WITH AN OLD
CAR BATTERY IN A WALMART PARKING
LOT.
Copy !req
1610. CAR BATTERY IN A WALMART PARKING
LOT.
Copy !req
1611. LOT.
PHILLY IS A WAR ZONE!
Copy !req
1612. PHILLY IS A WAR ZONE!
OKAY, KAREN, NEWS FLASH.
Copy !req
1613. OKAY, KAREN, NEWS FLASH.
WE DON'T WANT ANY MORE BAD NEWS.
Copy !req
1614. OKAY, KAREN, NEWS FLASH.
WE DON'T WANT ANY MORE BAD NEWS.
YEAH, WE'RE SICK OF BAD NEWS.
Copy !req
1615. WE DON'T WANT ANY MORE BAD NEWS.
YEAH, WE'RE SICK OF BAD NEWS.
SICK OF BAD NEWS, KAREN.
Copy !req
1616. YEAH, WE'RE SICK OF BAD NEWS.
SICK OF BAD NEWS, KAREN.
OKAY.
Copy !req
1617. SICK OF BAD NEWS, KAREN.
OKAY.
WELL, THIS IS KIND OF GOOD NEWS.
Copy !req
1618. OKAY.
WELL, THIS IS KIND OF GOOD NEWS.
THE OTHER DAY A SERIAL KILLER
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1619. WELL, THIS IS KIND OF GOOD NEWS.
THE OTHER DAY A SERIAL KILLER
KILLED ANOTHER SERIAL KILLER IN
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1620. THE OTHER DAY A SERIAL KILLER
KILLED ANOTHER SERIAL KILLER IN
FRONT OF BETSY ROSS' HOUSE, SO
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1621. KILLED ANOTHER SERIAL KILLER IN
FRONT OF BETSY ROSS' HOUSE, SO
THAT'S LIKE TWO LESS SERIAL
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1622. FRONT OF BETSY ROSS' HOUSE, SO
THAT'S LIKE TWO LESS SERIAL
KILLERS THAT WE HAVE.
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1623. THAT'S LIKE TWO LESS SERIAL
KILLERS THAT WE HAVE.
YOU KNOW, IN PHILADELPHIA,
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1624. KILLERS THAT WE HAVE.
YOU KNOW, IN PHILADELPHIA,
THAT'S LIKE A CHRISTMAS MIRACLE.
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1625. YOU KNOW, IN PHILADELPHIA,
THAT'S LIKE A CHRISTMAS MIRACLE.
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1626. THAT'S LIKE A CHRISTMAS MIRACLE.
UNBELIEVABLE.
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1627. UNBELIEVABLE.
THE WORLD HAS GONE CUCKOO,
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1628. UNBELIEVABLE.
THE WORLD HAS GONE CUCKOO,
OKAY?
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1629. THE WORLD HAS GONE CUCKOO,
OKAY?
I DON'T EVEN DRINK COFFEE IN THE
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1630. OKAY?
I DON'T EVEN DRINK COFFEE IN THE
MORNING ANYMORE, I GO STRAIGHT
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1631. I DON'T EVEN DRINK COFFEE IN THE
MORNING ANYMORE, I GO STRAIGHT
TO WINE.
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1632. MORNING ANYMORE, I GO STRAIGHT
TO WINE.
I MEAN.
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1633. TO WINE.
I MEAN.
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1634. I MEAN.
COME ON, IT'S CHRISTMAS.
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1635. COME ON, IT'S CHRISTMAS.
YOU KNOW WHAT ELSE IS CRAZY?
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1636. COME ON, IT'S CHRISTMAS.
YOU KNOW WHAT ELSE IS CRAZY?
THE TRAFFIC.
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1637. YOU KNOW WHAT ELSE IS CRAZY?
THE TRAFFIC.
I CAN'T GET ANYWHERE.
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1638. THE TRAFFIC.
I CAN'T GET ANYWHERE.
I HAVE TO GET A TAXI DRIVER JUST
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1639. I CAN'T GET ANYWHERE.
I HAVE TO GET A TAXI DRIVER JUST
TO GO HALF A BLOCK BECAUSE OF
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1640. I HAVE TO GET A TAXI DRIVER JUST
TO GO HALF A BLOCK BECAUSE OF
THE STUPID TREE.
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1641. TO GO HALF A BLOCK BECAUSE OF
THE STUPID TREE.
WHY ARE YOU CRYING OVER
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1642. THE STUPID TREE.
WHY ARE YOU CRYING OVER
TRAFFIC?
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1643. WHY ARE YOU CRYING OVER
TRAFFIC?
I DON'T KNOW.
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1644. TRAFFIC?
I DON'T KNOW.
ARE YOU OKAY?
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1645. I DON'T KNOW.
ARE YOU OKAY?
YOU'RE ACTING CRAZY.
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1646. ARE YOU OKAY?
YOU'RE ACTING CRAZY.
YOU'RE HAVING MOOD SWINGS.
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1647. YOU'RE ACTING CRAZY.
YOU'RE HAVING MOOD SWINGS.
DO YOU WANT SOME WATER?
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1648. YOU'RE HAVING MOOD SWINGS.
DO YOU WANT SOME WATER?
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1649. DO YOU WANT SOME WATER?
DO I WANT WHAT?
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1650. DO I WANT WHAT?
WATER?
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1651. DO I WANT WHAT?
WATER?
YOU'RE NOT DRINKING, YOUR MOODS
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1652. WATER?
YOU'RE NOT DRINKING, YOUR MOODS
ARE ALL OVER THE PLACE.
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1653. YOU'RE NOT DRINKING, YOUR MOODS
ARE ALL OVER THE PLACE.
OH, MY GOD, I GOT A FEELING IN
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1654. ARE ALL OVER THE PLACE.
OH, MY GOD, I GOT A FEELING IN
MY GUT.
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1655. OH, MY GOD, I GOT A FEELING IN
MY GUT.
PLEASE TELL ME I'M WRONG.
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1656. MY GUT.
PLEASE TELL ME I'M WRONG.
PLEASE TELL ME I'M WRONG.
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1657. PLEASE TELL ME I'M WRONG.
PLEASE TELL ME I'M WRONG.
YOU'RE NOT WRONG, I'M
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1658. PLEASE TELL ME I'M WRONG.
YOU'RE NOT WRONG, I'M
PREGNANT.
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1659. YOU'RE NOT WRONG, I'M
PREGNANT.
I HAVE AN 18-YEAR-OLD ON HER WAY
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1660. PREGNANT.
I HAVE AN 18-YEAR-OLD ON HER WAY
TO UNIVERSITY OF MARYLAND AND I
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1661. I HAVE AN 18-YEAR-OLD ON HER WAY
TO UNIVERSITY OF MARYLAND AND I
ALSO HAVE TO GO SHOP FOR TWO
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1662. TO UNIVERSITY OF MARYLAND AND I
ALSO HAVE TO GO SHOP FOR TWO
AFTER THIS.
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1663. ALSO HAVE TO GO SHOP FOR TWO
AFTER THIS.
OH MY GOD.
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1664. AFTER THIS.
OH MY GOD.
OH BABY, THAT'S TERRIBLE
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1665. OH MY GOD.
OH BABY, THAT'S TERRIBLE
NEWS.
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1666. OH BABY, THAT'S TERRIBLE
NEWS.
TERRIBLE NEWS.
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1667. NEWS.
TERRIBLE NEWS.
SO TERRIBLE, BUT BABIES ARE A
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1668. TERRIBLE NEWS.
SO TERRIBLE, BUT BABIES ARE A
BLESSING.
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1669. SO TERRIBLE, BUT BABIES ARE A
BLESSING.
A BLESSING.
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1670. BLESSING.
A BLESSING.
CONGRATULATIONS.
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1671. A BLESSING.
CONGRATULATIONS.
SO IS FAMILY.
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1672. CONGRATULATIONS.
SO IS FAMILY.
AND NO MATTER HOW CRAZY THE
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1673. SO IS FAMILY.
AND NO MATTER HOW CRAZY THE
WORLD GETS, YOU CAN ALWAYS COUNT
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1674. AND NO MATTER HOW CRAZY THE
WORLD GETS, YOU CAN ALWAYS COUNT
ON US NO MATTER WHAT.
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1675. WORLD GETS, YOU CAN ALWAYS COUNT
ON US NO MATTER WHAT.
NO MATTER WHAT.
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1676. ON US NO MATTER WHAT.
NO MATTER WHAT.
ALWAYS. I LOVE YOU, I LOVE
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1677. NO MATTER WHAT.
ALWAYS. I LOVE YOU, I LOVE
YOU GUYS.
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1678. ALWAYS. I LOVE YOU, I LOVE
YOU GUYS.
MERRY CHRISTMAS.
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1679. YOU GUYS.
MERRY CHRISTMAS.
I LOVE YOU GUYS.
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1680. MERRY CHRISTMAS.
I LOVE YOU GUYS.
MERRY CHRISTMAS.
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1681. I LOVE YOU GUYS.
MERRY CHRISTMAS.
AND I'M SO HAPPY FOR YOU, BUT
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1682. MERRY CHRISTMAS.
AND I'M SO HAPPY FOR YOU, BUT
IF I WAS PREGNANT, I WOULD KILL
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1683. AND I'M SO HAPPY FOR YOU, BUT
IF I WAS PREGNANT, I WOULD KILL
MYSELF.
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1684. IF I WAS PREGNANT, I WOULD KILL
MYSELF.
I KNOW.
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1685. MYSELF.
I KNOW.
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1686. I KNOW.
ALL RIGHT, WE'RE ALMOST OUT
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1687. ALL RIGHT, WE'RE ALMOST OUT
OF TIME AND I JUST REALIZED WE
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1688. ALL RIGHT, WE'RE ALMOST OUT
OF TIME AND I JUST REALIZED WE
NEVER LOOKED AT YOUR ORNAMENTS.
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1689. OF TIME AND I JUST REALIZED WE
NEVER LOOKED AT YOUR ORNAMENTS.
OH RIGHT.
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1690. NEVER LOOKED AT YOUR ORNAMENTS.
OH RIGHT.
OH, YEAH, OKAY.
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1691. OH RIGHT.
OH, YEAH, OKAY.
HERE'S ONE.
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1692. OH, YEAH, OKAY.
HERE'S ONE.
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1693. HERE'S ONE.
OH.
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1694. OH.
I GOT TO BE HONEST WITH YOU,
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1695. OH.
I GOT TO BE HONEST WITH YOU,
THEY'RE NOT GREAT.
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1696. I GOT TO BE HONEST WITH YOU,
THEY'RE NOT GREAT.
NO.
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1697. THEY'RE NOT GREAT.
NO.
NOT AT ALL.
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1698. NO.
NOT AT ALL.
THEY'RE NOT.
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1699. NOT AT ALL.
THEY'RE NOT.
DON'T QUIT YOUR DAY JOB.
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1700. THEY'RE NOT.
DON'T QUIT YOUR DAY JOB.
YEAH, JUST PUT IT BACK IN THE
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1701. DON'T QUIT YOUR DAY JOB.
YEAH, JUST PUT IT BACK IN THE
BOX.
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1702. YEAH, JUST PUT IT BACK IN THE
BOX.
ALL RIGHT MERRY CHRISTMAS,
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1703. BOX.
ALL RIGHT MERRY CHRISTMAS,
EVERYONE.
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1704. ALL RIGHT MERRY CHRISTMAS,
EVERYONE.
MERRY CHRISTMAS.
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1705. EVERYONE.
MERRY CHRISTMAS.
LET'S GET OUT OF HERE.
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1706. MERRY CHRISTMAS.
LET'S GET OUT OF HERE.
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1707. LET'S GET OUT OF HERE.
THANKS, EVERYBODY!
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1708. THANKS, EVERYBODY!
ONCE AGAIN, BRUCE SPRINGSTEEN
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1709. THANKS, EVERYBODY!
ONCE AGAIN, BRUCE SPRINGSTEEN
AND THE E STREET BAND!
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1710. ONCE AGAIN, BRUCE SPRINGSTEEN
AND THE E STREET BAND!
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1711. YOU BETTER NOT POUT I'M
TELLING YOU WHY ♪
♪ SANTA CLAUS IS COMING TO
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1712. TELLING YOU WHY ♪
♪ SANTA CLAUS IS COMING TO
TOWN
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1713. SANTA CLAUS IS COMING TO
TOWN ♪
♪ SANTA CLAUS IS COMING TO
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1714. TOWN ♪
♪ SANTA CLAUS IS COMING TO
TOWN
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1715. HE'S MAKING A LIST, HE'S
CHECKING IT TWICE ♪
♪ GOING TO FIND OUT WHO IS
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1716. CHECKING IT TWICE ♪
♪ GOING TO FIND OUT WHO IS
NAUGHTY OR NICE
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1717. SANTA CLAUS IS COMING TO
TOWN ♪
♪ SANTA CLAUS IS COMING TO
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1718. TOWN ♪
♪ SANTA CLAUS IS COMING TO
TOWN
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1719. SLEEPING
HE KNOWS IF YOU'RE AWAKE ♪
♪ HE KNOWS IF YOU BEEN BAD
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1720. HE KNOWS IF YOU'RE AWAKE ♪
♪ HE KNOWS IF YOU BEEN BAD
OR GOOD
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1721. BETTER STAY GOOD FOR GOODNESS
SAKE ♪
♪ YOU BETTER BE GOOD FOR
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1722. SAKE ♪
♪ YOU BETTER BE GOOD FOR
GOODNESS SAKE
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1723. BETTER WATCH OUT, YOU BETTER
NOT CRY ♪
♪ BETTER NOT POUT, I'M TELLING
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1724. NOT CRY ♪
♪ BETTER NOT POUT, I'M TELLING
YOU WHY
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1725. SANTA CLAUS IS COMING TO
TOWN ♪
♪ SANTA CLAUS IS COMING TO
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1726. TOWN ♪
♪ SANTA CLAUS IS COMING TO
TOWN
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1727. SANTA CLAUS IS COMING TO
TOWN ♪
HAPPY HOLIDAYS, EVERYBODY!
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1728. TOWN ♪
HAPPY HOLIDAYS, EVERYBODY!
MERRY CHRISTMAS, NEW YORK!
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1729. HAPPY HOLIDAYS, EVERYBODY!
MERRY CHRISTMAS, NEW YORK!
HAVE YOU BEEN GOOD?
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1730. MERRY CHRISTMAS, NEW YORK!
HAVE YOU BEEN GOOD?
AMY, YOU BEEN GOOD?
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1731. HAVE YOU BEEN GOOD?
AMY, YOU BEEN GOOD?
YES!
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1732. AMY, YOU BEEN GOOD?
YES!
♪ SANTA CLAUS IS COMING TO
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1733. YES!
♪ SANTA CLAUS IS COMING TO
TOWN
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1734. SANTA CLAUS IS COMING TO
TOWN ♪
♪ SANTA CLAUS IS COMING TO
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1735. TOWN ♪
♪ SANTA CLAUS IS COMING TO
TOWN
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1736. SANTA CLAUS IS COMING TO
TOWN ♪
♪ SANTA CLAUS IS COMING TO
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1737. TOWN ♪
♪ SANTA CLAUS IS COMING TO
TOWN
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1738. SANTA CLAUS IS COMING TO
TOWN ♪
♪ SANTA CLAUS IS COMING TO
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1739. TOWN ♪
♪ SANTA CLAUS IS COMING TO
TOWN
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1740. SANTA CLAUS IS COMING TO
TOWN ♪
♪ SANTA CLAUS IS COMING TO
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1741. TOWN ♪
♪ SANTA CLAUS IS COMING TO
TOWN
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