1. > AND NOW A MESSAGE FROM
HILLARY CLINTON, FOLLOWING HER
RECENT STRING OF LOSSES.
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2. HILLARY CLINTON, FOLLOWING HER
RECENT STRING OF LOSSES.
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3. RECENT STRING OF LOSSES.
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4. YES.
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5. YES.
HELLO, AMERICA.
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6. YES.
HELLO, AMERICA.
IT'S TRUE, I HAVE NOT BEEN
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7. HELLO, AMERICA.
IT'S TRUE, I HAVE NOT BEEN
WINNING AS OF LATE.
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8. IT'S TRUE, I HAVE NOT BEEN
WINNING AS OF LATE.
IN FACT, I HAVE NOT WON A STATE
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9. WINNING AS OF LATE.
IN FACT, I HAVE NOT WON A STATE
IN ALMOST THREE WEEKS, BECAUSE
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10. IN FACT, I HAVE NOT WON A STATE
IN ALMOST THREE WEEKS, BECAUSE
THAT WAS THE PLAN.
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11. IN ALMOST THREE WEEKS, BECAUSE
THAT WAS THE PLAN.
I DIDN'T WANT TO WIN THOSE, AND
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12. THAT WAS THE PLAN.
I DIDN'T WANT TO WIN THOSE, AND
SO I DIDN'T.
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13. I DIDN'T WANT TO WIN THOSE, AND
SO I DIDN'T.
IT DOESN'T BOTHER ME ONE BIT,
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14. SO I DIDN'T.
IT DOESN'T BOTHER ME ONE BIT,
I'M NOT RATTLED, LIKE THE OLD
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15. IT DOESN'T BOTHER ME ONE BIT,
I'M NOT RATTLED, LIKE THE OLD
ADAGE SAYS, YOU WIN SOME, YOU
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16. I'M NOT RATTLED, LIKE THE OLD
ADAGE SAYS, YOU WIN SOME, YOU
LO — YOU LO — YOU WIN SOME,
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17. ADAGE SAYS, YOU WIN SOME, YOU
LO — YOU LO — YOU WIN SOME,
YOU LO — CLOSE ENOUGH.
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18. LO — YOU LO — YOU WIN SOME,
YOU LO — CLOSE ENOUGH.
BESIDES, WHO CAN REMEMBER HOW
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19. YOU LO — CLOSE ENOUGH.
BESIDES, WHO CAN REMEMBER HOW
MANY STATES I'VE LOST IN A ROW.
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20. BESIDES, WHO CAN REMEMBER HOW
MANY STATES I'VE LOST IN A ROW.
IS IT TWO, IS IT THREE?
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21. MANY STATES I'VE LOST IN A ROW.
IS IT TWO, IS IT THREE?
I DON'T KNOW.
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22. IS IT TWO, IS IT THREE?
I DON'T KNOW.
I'M HERE TO FIX SEVEN HOLES
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23. I DON'T KNOW.
I'M HERE TO FIX SEVEN HOLES
IN YOUR WALL.
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24. I'M HERE TO FIX SEVEN HOLES
IN YOUR WALL.
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25. IN YOUR WALL.
COME TO THINK OF IT, IT MIGHT
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26. COME TO THINK OF IT, IT MIGHT
HAVE BEEN SEVEN.
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27. COME TO THINK OF IT, IT MIGHT
HAVE BEEN SEVEN.
AND THAT'S FANTASTIC.
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28. HAVE BEEN SEVEN.
AND THAT'S FANTASTIC.
IT HUMANIZES ME.
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29. AND THAT'S FANTASTIC.
IT HUMANIZES ME.
I'M THE UNDERDOG NOW, I'M THIS
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30. IT HUMANIZES ME.
I'M THE UNDERDOG NOW, I'M THIS
ELECTION'S RUDY, AND I LIKE
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31. I'M THE UNDERDOG NOW, I'M THIS
ELECTION'S RUDY, AND I LIKE
THAT.
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32. ELECTION'S RUDY, AND I LIKE
THAT.
AFTER ALL, I DON'T WANT TO BE A
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33. THAT.
AFTER ALL, I DON'T WANT TO BE A
BIG OLD B AND WIN EVERY SINGLE
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34. AFTER ALL, I DON'T WANT TO BE A
BIG OLD B AND WIN EVERY SINGLE
STATE.
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35. BIG OLD B AND WIN EVERY SINGLE
STATE.
THAT'S NO FUN.
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36. STATE.
THAT'S NO FUN.
ENOUGH ABOUT THE PAST.
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37. THAT'S NO FUN.
ENOUGH ABOUT THE PAST.
IT'S TIME TO LOOK FORWARD TO THE
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38. ENOUGH ABOUT THE PAST.
IT'S TIME TO LOOK FORWARD TO THE
FUTURE, AND RIGHT NOW MY FOCUS
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39. IT'S TIME TO LOOK FORWARD TO THE
FUTURE, AND RIGHT NOW MY FOCUS
IS HERE IN NEW YORK!
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40. FUTURE, AND RIGHT NOW MY FOCUS
IS HERE IN NEW YORK!
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41. IS HERE IN NEW YORK!
GOD I LOVE BEING BACK IN THE FAT
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42. GOD I LOVE BEING BACK IN THE FAT
APPLE.
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43. GOD I LOVE BEING BACK IN THE FAT
APPLE.
MY HOME STATE, EXCEPT FOR
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44. APPLE.
MY HOME STATE, EXCEPT FOR
ILLINOIS AND ARKANSAS.
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45. MY HOME STATE, EXCEPT FOR
ILLINOIS AND ARKANSAS.
BUT THEY ALREADY VOTED FOR ME,
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46. ILLINOIS AND ARKANSAS.
BUT THEY ALREADY VOTED FOR ME,
SO WE COOL, WE COOL.
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47. BUT THEY ALREADY VOTED FOR ME,
SO WE COOL, WE COOL.
NEW YORK HAS BEEN COLD THIS
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48. SO WE COOL, WE COOL.
NEW YORK HAS BEEN COLD THIS
WEEK, ISN'T IT?
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49. NEW YORK HAS BEEN COLD THIS
WEEK, ISN'T IT?
IN FACT MY HEAD IS GETTING A
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50. WEEK, ISN'T IT?
IN FACT MY HEAD IS GETTING A
LITTLE CHILLY.
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51. IN FACT MY HEAD IS GETTING A
LITTLE CHILLY.
I BETTER PUT ON MY FAVORITE HAT
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52. LITTLE CHILLY.
I BETTER PUT ON MY FAVORITE HAT
I'VE WORN SO MANY TIMES OVER THE
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53. I BETTER PUT ON MY FAVORITE HAT
I'VE WORN SO MANY TIMES OVER THE
YEARS.
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54. I'VE WORN SO MANY TIMES OVER THE
YEARS.
HERE WE GO, THAT WILL KEEP ME
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55. YEARS.
HERE WE GO, THAT WILL KEEP ME
WARM WHILE I EAT MY FAVORITE
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56. HERE WE GO, THAT WILL KEEP ME
WARM WHILE I EAT MY FAVORITE
DINNER.
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57. WARM WHILE I EAT MY FAVORITE
DINNER.
A FAMOUS NEW YORK CITY STREET
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58. DINNER.
A FAMOUS NEW YORK CITY STREET
HOT DOG.
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59. A FAMOUS NEW YORK CITY STREET
HOT DOG.
FOR DESSERT, ALL YOU NEW YORKERS
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60. HOT DOG.
FOR DESSERT, ALL YOU NEW YORKERS
KNOW THAT I AM JUST NUTS FOR NUT
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61. FOR DESSERT, ALL YOU NEW YORKERS
KNOW THAT I AM JUST NUTS FOR NUT
S.
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62. KNOW THAT I AM JUST NUTS FOR NUT
S.
AND LATER TONIGHT, I'M GOING TO
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63. S.
AND LATER TONIGHT, I'M GOING TO
TAKE IN THAT HOT NEW BROADWAY
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64. AND LATER TONIGHT, I'M GOING TO
TAKE IN THAT HOT NEW BROADWAY
SHOW THAT'S GOT ALL OF NYC
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65. TAKE IN THAT HOT NEW BROADWAY
SHOW THAT'S GOT ALL OF NYC
ABUSINESS, "CHICAGO."
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66. SHOW THAT'S GOT ALL OF NYC
ABUSINESS, "CHICAGO."
BUT YOU KNOW WHAT MY FAVORITE
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67. ABUSINESS, "CHICAGO."
BUT YOU KNOW WHAT MY FAVORITE
PART OF NEW YORK IS, THE SUBWAY,
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68. BUT YOU KNOW WHAT MY FAVORITE
PART OF NEW YORK IS, THE SUBWAY,
I LOVE TO RIDE IT.
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69. PART OF NEW YORK IS, THE SUBWAY,
I LOVE TO RIDE IT.
AND I'M COMFORTABLE RIDING IT.
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70. I LOVE TO RIDE IT.
AND I'M COMFORTABLE RIDING IT.
HERE'S ME USING EARLIER TODAY.
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71. AND I'M COMFORTABLE RIDING IT.
HERE'S ME USING EARLIER TODAY.
THE NEW YORK CITY SUBWAY IS THE
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72. HERE'S ME USING EARLIER TODAY.
THE NEW YORK CITY SUBWAY IS THE
BEST WAY TO GET AROUND.
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73. THE NEW YORK CITY SUBWAY IS THE
BEST WAY TO GET AROUND.
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74. BEST WAY TO GET AROUND.
SORRY, IT'S BEEN AWHILE.
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75. SORRY, IT'S BEEN AWHILE.
IS THIS A WORKING METRO CARD.
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76. SORRY, IT'S BEEN AWHILE.
IS THIS A WORKING METRO CARD.
IS THIS — I'LL JUST GO IN THE
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77. IS THIS A WORKING METRO CARD.
IS THIS — I'LL JUST GO IN THE
OLD FASHIONED WAY.
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78. IS THIS — I'LL JUST GO IN THE
OLD FASHIONED WAY.
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79. OLD FASHIONED WAY.
I'LL TAKE A CAB.
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80. I'LL TAKE A CAB.
CAB IS THE BEST WAY TO GET
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81. I'LL TAKE A CAB.
CAB IS THE BEST WAY TO GET
AROUND.
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82. CAB IS THE BEST WAY TO GET
AROUND.
MRS. 34RZ.
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83. AROUND.
MRS. 34RZ.
SEE, NEW YORKERS, I'M JUST
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84. MRS. 34RZ.
SEE, NEW YORKERS, I'M JUST
LIKE ALL OF YOU.
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85. SEE, NEW YORKERS, I'M JUST
LIKE ALL OF YOU.
I NEVER SLEEP, I'M IN A HURRY TO
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86. LIKE ALL OF YOU.
I NEVER SLEEP, I'M IN A HURRY TO
GET TO WORK.
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87. I NEVER SLEEP, I'M IN A HURRY TO
GET TO WORK.
AND WHEN I'M RUNNING, I REALLY
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88. GET TO WORK.
AND WHEN I'M RUNNING, I REALLY
HATE IT WHEN A SLOW OLD JEW GETS
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89. AND WHEN I'M RUNNING, I REALLY
HATE IT WHEN A SLOW OLD JEW GETS
IN MY WAY.
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90. HATE IT WHEN A SLOW OLD JEW GETS
IN MY WAY.
THERE'S MY ALARM, TIME TO TURN
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91. IN MY WAY.
THERE'S MY ALARM, TIME TO TURN
MY HAT AROUND.
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92. THERE'S MY ALARM, TIME TO TURN
MY HAT AROUND.
THERE WE GO, I LOVE THOSE NEW
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93. MY HAT AROUND.
THERE WE GO, I LOVE THOSE NEW
YORK MEATS.
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94. THERE WE GO, I LOVE THOSE NEW
YORK MEATS.
SO TO ALL OF MY SUPPORTERS HERE
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95. YORK MEATS.
SO TO ALL OF MY SUPPORTERS HERE
IN NEW YORK, PLEASE REMEMBER TO
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96. SO TO ALL OF MY SUPPORTERS HERE
IN NEW YORK, PLEASE REMEMBER TO
GET OUT THERE NEXT TUESDAY AND
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97. IN NEW YORK, PLEASE REMEMBER TO
GET OUT THERE NEXT TUESDAY AND
CAST YOUR VOTE FOR ME.
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98. GET OUT THERE NEXT TUESDAY AND
CAST YOUR VOTE FOR ME.
AND TO ALL OF YOU YOUNG PEOPLE
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99. CAST YOUR VOTE FOR ME.
AND TO ALL OF YOU YOUNG PEOPLE
IN NEW YORK, LET ME SAY THIS,
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100. AND TO ALL OF YOU YOUNG PEOPLE
IN NEW YORK, LET ME SAY THIS,
VOTING'S FOR NERDS, WHO CARES,
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101. IN NEW YORK, LET ME SAY THIS,
VOTING'S FOR NERDS, WHO CARES,
JUST SLEEP IN.
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102. VOTING'S FOR NERDS, WHO CARES,
JUST SLEEP IN.
I'M SURE YOU'RE ALL HUNG OVER
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103. JUST SLEEP IN.
I'M SURE YOU'RE ALL HUNG OVER
FROM YOUR TUMBLR PARTIES ANYWAY.
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104. I'M SURE YOU'RE ALL HUNG OVER
FROM YOUR TUMBLR PARTIES ANYWAY.
AND TO SUSAN SARANDON, WHY DON'T
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105. FROM YOUR TUMBLR PARTIES ANYWAY.
AND TO SUSAN SARANDON, WHY DON'T
YOU FAKE TUESDAY TO GO DRIVE OFF
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106. AND TO SUSAN SARANDON, WHY DON'T
YOU FAKE TUESDAY TO GO DRIVE OFF
ANOTHER CLIFF.
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107. YOU FAKE TUESDAY TO GO DRIVE OFF
ANOTHER CLIFF.
NOW, LISTEN, I KNOW BERNIE MAY
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108. ANOTHER CLIFF.
NOW, LISTEN, I KNOW BERNIE MAY
BE TEMPTING SOME OF YOU.
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109. NOW, LISTEN, I KNOW BERNIE MAY
BE TEMPTING SOME OF YOU.
HE'S HONEST, HE SHOUTS IT LIKE
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110. BE TEMPTING SOME OF YOU.
HE'S HONEST, HE SHOUTS IT LIKE
IT IS, AND HE EVEN HAD A CUTE
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111. HE'S HONEST, HE SHOUTS IT LIKE
IT IS, AND HE EVEN HAD A CUTE
LITTLE BIRD LAND ON HIS PODIUM
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112. IT IS, AND HE EVEN HAD A CUTE
LITTLE BIRD LAND ON HIS PODIUM
THAT ONE TIME.
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113. LITTLE BIRD LAND ON HIS PODIUM
THAT ONE TIME.
I HAVE A WINGED FRIEND OF MY OWN
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114. THAT ONE TIME.
I HAVE A WINGED FRIEND OF MY OWN
THREE-EYE RAVEN FROM THE GAME OF
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115. I HAVE A WINGED FRIEND OF MY OWN
THREE-EYE RAVEN FROM THE GAME OF
THRONES, AND HER MESSAGE IS
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116. THREE-EYE RAVEN FROM THE GAME OF
THRONES, AND HER MESSAGE IS
CLEAR.
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117. THRONES, AND HER MESSAGE IS
CLEAR.
IF YOU DON'T VOTE FOR ME ON
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118. CLEAR.
IF YOU DON'T VOTE FOR ME ON
APRIL 19th, WINTER IS COMING.
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119. IF YOU DON'T VOTE FOR ME ON
APRIL 19th, WINTER IS COMING.
AND FINALLY, EVERYONE, I KNOW
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120. APRIL 19th, WINTER IS COMING.
AND FINALLY, EVERYONE, I KNOW
THIS WEEK A PESKY LITTLE YOU
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121. AND FINALLY, EVERYONE, I KNOW
THIS WEEK A PESKY LITTLE YOU
KNOW WHAT, SAID I WASN'T
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122. THIS WEEK A PESKY LITTLE YOU
KNOW WHAT, SAID I WASN'T
QUALIFIED TO BE PRESIDENT.
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123. KNOW WHAT, SAID I WASN'T
QUALIFIED TO BE PRESIDENT.
HERE'S THE TRUTH, I WOULD BE THE
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124. QUALIFIED TO BE PRESIDENT.
HERE'S THE TRUTH, I WOULD BE THE
STRONGEST CANDIDATE TO GO UP
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125. HERE'S THE TRUTH, I WOULD BE THE
STRONGEST CANDIDATE TO GO UP
AGAINST DONALD TRUMP FACE TO
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126. STRONGEST CANDIDATE TO GO UP
AGAINST DONALD TRUMP FACE TO
FACE OR GO UP AGAINST TED CRUZ
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127. AGAINST DONALD TRUMP FACE TO
FACE OR GO UP AGAINST TED CRUZ
FACE TO WHATEVER YOU CALL THAT
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128. FACE OR GO UP AGAINST TED CRUZ
FACE TO WHATEVER YOU CALL THAT
UP THERE.
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129. FACE TO WHATEVER YOU CALL THAT
UP THERE.
AND LIVE FROM NEW YORK, IT'S
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130. UP THERE.
AND LIVE FROM NEW YORK, IT'S
SATURDAY NIGHT!
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131. AND LIVE FROM NEW YORK, IT'S
SATURDAY NIGHT!
IT'S "SATURDAY
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132. SATURDAY NIGHT!
IT'S "SATURDAY
NIGHT LIVE."
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133. NIGHT LIVE."
WITH —
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134. WITH —
VANESSA BAYER, BECK BENNETT,
AIDY BRYANT, COLIN JOST,
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135. VANESSA BAYER, BECK BENNETT,
AIDY BRYANT, COLIN JOST,
TARAN KILLAM, KATE McKINNON,
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136. AIDY BRYANT, COLIN JOST,
TARAN KILLAM, KATE McKINNON,
KYLE MOONEY, BOBBY MOYNIHAN,
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137. TARAN KILLAM, KATE McKINNON,
KYLE MOONEY, BOBBY MOYNIHAN,
JAY PHAROAH, CECILY STRONG,
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138. KYLE MOONEY, BOBBY MOYNIHAN,
JAY PHAROAH, CECILY STRONG,
KENAN THOMPSON, SASHEER ZAMADA.
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139. JAY PHAROAH, CECILY STRONG,
KENAN THOMPSON, SASHEER ZAMADA.
FEATURING —
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140. KENAN THOMPSON, SASHEER ZAMADA.
FEATURING —
MICHAEL CHE, PETE DAVIDSON,
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141. FEATURING —
MICHAEL CHE, PETE DAVIDSON,
LESLIE JONES, JOHN RUDNITSKY,
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142. MICHAEL CHE, PETE DAVIDSON,
LESLIE JONES, JOHN RUDNITSKY,
MUSICAL GUEST, MARGO PRICE, AND
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143. LESLIE JONES, JOHN RUDNITSKY,
MUSICAL GUEST, MARGO PRICE, AND
YOUR HOST, RUSSELL CROWE.
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144. LADIES AND
GENTLEMEN, RUSSELL CROWE.
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145. GENTLEMEN, RUSSELL CROWE.
THANK YOU.
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146. THANK YOU.
THANK YOU.
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147. THANK YOU.
THANK YOU.
THANK YOU VERY MUCH.
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148. THANK YOU.
THANK YOU VERY MUCH.
IT'S SO GREAT TO FINALLY BE HERE
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149. THANK YOU VERY MUCH.
IT'S SO GREAT TO FINALLY BE HERE
HOSTING "SATURDAY NIGHT LIVE."
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150. IT'S SO GREAT TO FINALLY BE HERE
HOSTING "SATURDAY NIGHT LIVE."
MY FRIENDS AND FAMILY ARE
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151. HOSTING "SATURDAY NIGHT LIVE."
MY FRIENDS AND FAMILY ARE
WATCHING THE SHOW FROM SYDNEY,
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152. MY FRIENDS AND FAMILY ARE
WATCHING THE SHOW FROM SYDNEY,
THEY'RE 14 HOURS AHEAD AND THEY
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153. WATCHING THE SHOW FROM SYDNEY,
THEY'RE 14 HOURS AHEAD AND THEY
ALREADY TOLD ME THE SHOW WAS
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154. THEY'RE 14 HOURS AHEAD AND THEY
ALREADY TOLD ME THE SHOW WAS
GREAT.
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155. ALREADY TOLD ME THE SHOW WAS
GREAT.
I HAVE A NEW MOVIE COMING OUT ON
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156. GREAT.
I HAVE A NEW MOVIE COMING OUT ON
MAY 20th, IT'S CALLED "NICE
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157. I HAVE A NEW MOVIE COMING OUT ON
MAY 20th, IT'S CALLED "NICE
GUYS."
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158. MAY 20th, IT'S CALLED "NICE
GUYS."
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159. GUYS."
MY CO-STAR IS A BEAUTIFUL YOUNG
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160. MY CO-STAR IS A BEAUTIFUL YOUNG
WOMAN NAMED RYAN GOSLING.
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161. MY CO-STAR IS A BEAUTIFUL YOUNG
WOMAN NAMED RYAN GOSLING.
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162. WOMAN NAMED RYAN GOSLING.
GOSLING ACTUALLY INSPIRED ME TO
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163. GOSLING ACTUALLY INSPIRED ME TO
DO THE SHOW.
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164. GOSLING ACTUALLY INSPIRED ME TO
DO THE SHOW.
I WATCHED HIM HOST IN DECEMBER.
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165. DO THE SHOW.
I WATCHED HIM HOST IN DECEMBER.
AND I WAS LIKE, WOW.
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166. I WATCHED HIM HOST IN DECEMBER.
AND I WAS LIKE, WOW.
ANYONE CAN DO THAT.
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167. AND I WAS LIKE, WOW.
ANYONE CAN DO THAT.
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168. ANYONE CAN DO THAT.
SO, HERE I AM.
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169. SO, HERE I AM.
I FEEL VERY AT HOME HOSTING
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170. SO, HERE I AM.
I FEEL VERY AT HOME HOSTING
"SATURDAY NIGHT LIVE," BECAUSE,
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171. I FEEL VERY AT HOME HOSTING
"SATURDAY NIGHT LIVE," BECAUSE,
OF COURSE, MY VERY LONG CAREER
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172. "SATURDAY NIGHT LIVE," BECAUSE,
OF COURSE, MY VERY LONG CAREER
IN COMEDY.
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173. OF COURSE, MY VERY LONG CAREER
IN COMEDY.
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174. IN COMEDY.
I'VE STARRED IN SO MANY LAUGH
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175. I'VE STARRED IN SO MANY LAUGH
OUT LOUD HYSTERICAL MOVIES OVER
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176. I'VE STARRED IN SO MANY LAUGH
OUT LOUD HYSTERICAL MOVIES OVER
THE YEARS.
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177. OUT LOUD HYSTERICAL MOVIES OVER
THE YEARS.
HERE'S A SCENE FROM ONE YOU MAY
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178. THE YEARS.
HERE'S A SCENE FROM ONE YOU MAY
REMEMBER.
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179. HERE'S A SCENE FROM ONE YOU MAY
REMEMBER.
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180. REMEMBER.
THAT CRACKS ME UP EVERY TIME
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181. THAT CRACKS ME UP EVERY TIME
I SEE THAT, BECAUSE, YOU KNOW,
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182. THAT CRACKS ME UP EVERY TIME
I SEE THAT, BECAUSE, YOU KNOW,
TWO SWORDS, RIGHT SNL COULD HAVE
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183. I SEE THAT, BECAUSE, YOU KNOW,
TWO SWORDS, RIGHT SNL COULD HAVE
GOTTEN THE JOB DONE WITH ONE.
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184. TWO SWORDS, RIGHT SNL COULD HAVE
GOTTEN THE JOB DONE WITH ONE.
NOT TO MENTION, I WAS WEARING A
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185. GOTTEN THE JOB DONE WITH ONE.
NOT TO MENTION, I WAS WEARING A
DRESS.
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186. NOT TO MENTION, I WAS WEARING A
DRESS.
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187. DRESS.
PROBABLY THE FUNNIEST MOVIE I
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188. PROBABLY THE FUNNIEST MOVIE I
DID THOUGH WAS ABOUT THIS REAL
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189. PROBABLY THE FUNNIEST MOVIE I
DID THOUGH WAS ABOUT THIS REAL
GOOFBALL TEACHER AND HIS WACKY
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190. DID THOUGH WAS ABOUT THIS REAL
GOOFBALL TEACHER AND HIS WACKY
IDEAS.
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191. GOOFBALL TEACHER AND HIS WACKY
IDEAS.
I WANTED TO CALL IT "THE NUTTY
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192. IDEAS.
I WANTED TO CALL IT "THE NUTTY
PROFESSOR."
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193. I WANTED TO CALL IT "THE NUTTY
PROFESSOR."
BUT THAT TITLE APPARENTLY WAS
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194. PROFESSOR."
BUT THAT TITLE APPARENTLY WAS
TAKEN.
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195. BUT THAT TITLE APPARENTLY WAS
TAKEN.
SO, THEY WENT WITH "A BEAUTIFUL
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196. TAKEN.
SO, THEY WENT WITH "A BEAUTIFUL
MIND."
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197. SO, THEY WENT WITH "A BEAUTIFUL
MIND."
THERE'S SOME GREAT SUBTLE HUMOR
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198. MIND."
THERE'S SOME GREAT SUBTLE HUMOR
IN THIS MOVIE.
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199. THERE'S SOME GREAT SUBTLE HUMOR
IN THIS MOVIE.
HAVE A LOOK.
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200. IN THIS MOVIE.
HAVE A LOOK.
REMIND YOURSELVES.
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201. REMIND YOURSELVES.
DID YOU CATCH IT?
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202. DID YOU CATCH IT?
HAVE ANOTHER LOOK.
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203. HAVE ANOTHER LOOK.
HAVE ANOTHER LOOK.
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204. HAVE ANOTHER LOOK.
HAVE ANOTHER LOOK.
80085.
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205. HAVE ANOTHER LOOK.
80085.
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206. 80085.
NOW THAT WORD LOOKS A LOT LIKE
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207. NOW THAT WORD LOOKS A LOT LIKE
BOOBS.
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208. NOW THAT WORD LOOKS A LOT LIKE
BOOBS.
I'M SO WELL KNOWN FOR DOING
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209. BOOBS.
I'M SO WELL KNOWN FOR DOING
COMEDIES, EVEN WHEN I DO A
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210. I'M SO WELL KNOWN FOR DOING
COMEDIES, EVEN WHEN I DO A
DRAMATIC PART, PEOPLE STILL WANT
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211. COMEDIES, EVEN WHEN I DO A
DRAMATIC PART, PEOPLE STILL WANT
TO LAUGH.
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212. DRAMATIC PART, PEOPLE STILL WANT
TO LAUGH.
♪ NOW PRISONER 24601
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213. TO LAUGH.
♪ NOW PRISONER 24601
YOUR TIME IS UP
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214. AND YOUR PAROLE'S BEGUN
YOU KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS ♪
WHAT CAN I SAY, IT'S A GIFT.
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215. YOU KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS ♪
WHAT CAN I SAY, IT'S A GIFT.
WE HAVE A GREAT SHOW FOR YOU
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216. WHAT CAN I SAY, IT'S A GIFT.
WE HAVE A GREAT SHOW FOR YOU
TONIGHT.
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217. WE HAVE A GREAT SHOW FOR YOU
TONIGHT.
THE AMAZING MARGO PRICE IS HERE.
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218. TONIGHT.
THE AMAZING MARGO PRICE IS HERE.
STICK AROUND, WE'LL BE RIGHT
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219. THE AMAZING MARGO PRICE IS HERE.
STICK AROUND, WE'LL BE RIGHT
BACK.
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220. STICK AROUND, WE'LL BE RIGHT
BACK.
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221. BACK.
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222. PLEASE FOLLOW ME.
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223. PLEASE FOLLOW ME.
YOUR TABLE'S READY.
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224. PLEASE FOLLOW ME.
YOUR TABLE'S READY.
ARE YOU COMING?
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225. YOUR TABLE'S READY.
ARE YOU COMING?
I'LL BE THERE IN A SECOND YOU
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226. ARE YOU COMING?
I'LL BE THERE IN A SECOND YOU
GO ON AHEAD.
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227. I'LL BE THERE IN A SECOND YOU
GO ON AHEAD.
OKAY.
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228. GO ON AHEAD.
OKAY.
HEY, MAN, HURTS TO SIT DOWN?
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229. OKAY.
HEY, MAN, HURTS TO SIT DOWN?
YEAH.
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230. HEY, MAN, HURTS TO SIT DOWN?
YEAH.
BURNS?
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231. YEAH.
BURNS?
YEAH.
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232. BURNS?
YEAH.
YOU NEED TO TRY THIS.
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233. YEAH.
YOU NEED TO TRY THIS.
IT'S PREPARATION H ADVANCED GEL
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234. YOU NEED TO TRY THIS.
IT'S PREPARATION H ADVANCED GEL
FOR FAST ACTING RELIEF.
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235. IT'S PREPARATION H ADVANCED GEL
FOR FAST ACTING RELIEF.
AND THIS STUFF WORKS?
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236. FOR FAST ACTING RELIEF.
AND THIS STUFF WORKS?
YEAH, IT WORKS.
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237. AND THIS STUFF WORKS?
YEAH, IT WORKS.
PREPARATION H ADVANCED GEL
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238. YEAH, IT WORKS.
PREPARATION H ADVANCED GEL
OFFERS MAXIMUM STRENGTH
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239. PREPARATION H ADVANCED GEL
OFFERS MAXIMUM STRENGTH
SOLUTIONS FOR ALL HEMORRHOID
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240. OFFERS MAXIMUM STRENGTH
SOLUTIONS FOR ALL HEMORRHOID
SYMPTOMS, DON'T LET PAIN STOP
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241. SOLUTIONS FOR ALL HEMORRHOID
SYMPTOMS, DON'T LET PAIN STOP
YOU FROM BEING THE LIFE OF THE
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242. SYMPTOMS, DON'T LET PAIN STOP
YOU FROM BEING THE LIFE OF THE
PARTY.
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243. YOU FROM BEING THE LIFE OF THE
PARTY.
SO I LOOSEN MY TIE, AND NOW
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244. PARTY.
SO I LOOSEN MY TIE, AND NOW
I'M DANCING WITH THE MOTHER OF
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245. SO I LOOSEN MY TIE, AND NOW
I'M DANCING WITH THE MOTHER OF
THE BRIDE.
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246. I'M DANCING WITH THE MOTHER OF
THE BRIDE.
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247. THE BRIDE.
HEY, MAN DID THAT STUFF I
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248. HEY, MAN DID THAT STUFF I
GAVE YOU HELP YOUR BUTT?
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249. HEY, MAN DID THAT STUFF I
GAVE YOU HELP YOUR BUTT?
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250. GAVE YOU HELP YOUR BUTT?
DO YOU KNOW ME?
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251. DO YOU KNOW ME?
THAT HEMORRHOID CREAM I GAVE
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252. DO YOU KNOW ME?
THAT HEMORRHOID CREAM I GAVE
YOU AT THE BAR, DID IT END UP
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253. THAT HEMORRHOID CREAM I GAVE
YOU AT THE BAR, DID IT END UP
HELPING YOUR BUTT?
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254. YOU AT THE BAR, DID IT END UP
HELPING YOUR BUTT?
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255. HELPING YOUR BUTT?
WHAT ARE YOU DOING?
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256. WHAT ARE YOU DOING?
YOUR BUTT WAS ON FIRE WHEN WE
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257. WHAT ARE YOU DOING?
YOUR BUTT WAS ON FIRE WHEN WE
MET.
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258. YOUR BUTT WAS ON FIRE WHEN WE
MET.
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259. MET.
PREPARATION H ADVANCED GEL,
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260. PREPARATION H ADVANCED GEL,
BECAUSE YOU'RE ON THE MOVE AND
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261. PREPARATION H ADVANCED GEL,
BECAUSE YOU'RE ON THE MOVE AND
IN THE GROOVE.
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262. BECAUSE YOU'RE ON THE MOVE AND
IN THE GROOVE.
I'VE NEVER SEEN YOU DANCE
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263. IN THE GROOVE.
I'VE NEVER SEEN YOU DANCE
BEFORE.
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264. I'VE NEVER SEEN YOU DANCE
BEFORE.
WELL, YOU BETTER GET USED TO
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265. BEFORE.
WELL, YOU BETTER GET USED TO
IT, BECAUSE I HAVE A FEELING I'M
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266. WELL, YOU BETTER GET USED TO
IT, BECAUSE I HAVE A FEELING I'M
GOING TO BE DANCING A WHOLE LOT
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267. IT, BECAUSE I HAVE A FEELING I'M
GOING TO BE DANCING A WHOLE LOT
MORE FROM NOW ON.
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268. GOING TO BE DANCING A WHOLE LOT
MORE FROM NOW ON.
HEY, I'VE BEEN LOOKING ALL
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269. MORE FROM NOW ON.
HEY, I'VE BEEN LOOKING ALL
OVER FOR YOU, DO YOU NEED ANY
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270. HEY, I'VE BEEN LOOKING ALL
OVER FOR YOU, DO YOU NEED ANY
MORE ASS CREAM?
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271. OVER FOR YOU, DO YOU NEED ANY
MORE ASS CREAM?
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272. MORE ASS CREAM?
DUDE, HONESTLY.
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273. DUDE, HONESTLY.
GET AWAY FROM ME.
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274. DUDE, HONESTLY.
GET AWAY FROM ME.
I GAVE YOU A HOT TIP, AND YOU
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275. GET AWAY FROM ME.
I GAVE YOU A HOT TIP, AND YOU
PRETEND LIKE YOU DON'T EVEN KNOW
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276. I GAVE YOU A HOT TIP, AND YOU
PRETEND LIKE YOU DON'T EVEN KNOW
ME?
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277. PRETEND LIKE YOU DON'T EVEN KNOW
ME?
I SAVED YOUR BACON, MAN.
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278. ME?
I SAVED YOUR BACON, MAN.
YEAH, RON HAD A HEMORRHOID
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279. I SAVED YOUR BACON, MAN.
YEAH, RON HAD A HEMORRHOID
PROBLEM, I DO TOO.
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280. YEAH, RON HAD A HEMORRHOID
PROBLEM, I DO TOO.
BAD.
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281. PROBLEM, I DO TOO.
BAD.
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282. BAD.
THAT'S WHY I TOLD RON ABOUT
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283. THAT'S WHY I TOLD RON ABOUT
PREPARATION H.
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284. THAT'S WHY I TOLD RON ABOUT
PREPARATION H.
PREPARATION H, THE RELIEF —
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285. PREPARATION H.
PREPARATION H, THE RELIEF —
HEY RON, COME WITH ME, I HAVE
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286. PREPARATION H, THE RELIEF —
HEY RON, COME WITH ME, I HAVE
TO PUT MORE CREAM ON.
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287. HEY RON, COME WITH ME, I HAVE
TO PUT MORE CREAM ON.
WHAT?
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288. TO PUT MORE CREAM ON.
WHAT?
I NEED YOU TO STAND IN FRONT
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289. WHAT?
I NEED YOU TO STAND IN FRONT
OF THE BATHROOM DOOR.
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290. I NEED YOU TO STAND IN FRONT
OF THE BATHROOM DOOR.
THERE'S NO LOCK ON THE DOOR, AND
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291. OF THE BATHROOM DOOR.
THERE'S NO LOCK ON THE DOOR, AND
A GIRL JUST WALKED IN ON ME
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292. THERE'S NO LOCK ON THE DOOR, AND
A GIRL JUST WALKED IN ON ME
LAYING DOWN ON THE GROUND WITH
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293. A GIRL JUST WALKED IN ON ME
LAYING DOWN ON THE GROUND WITH
MY LEGS OVER MY HEAD CREAMING
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294. LAYING DOWN ON THE GROUND WITH
MY LEGS OVER MY HEAD CREAMING
UP.
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295. MY LEGS OVER MY HEAD CREAMING
UP.
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296. UP.
I AM NOT DOING THAT.
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297. I AM NOT DOING THAT.
YOU'RE MY BEST FRIEND!
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298. I AM NOT DOING THAT.
YOU'RE MY BEST FRIEND!
PREPARATION H, HEMORRHOIDS
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299. YOU'RE MY BEST FRIEND!
PREPARATION H, HEMORRHOIDS
FADE, FRIENDS ARE FOREVER.
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300. PREPARATION H, HEMORRHOIDS
FADE, FRIENDS ARE FOREVER.
COME ON, STOP CRAPPING
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301. FADE, FRIENDS ARE FOREVER.
COME ON, STOP CRAPPING
AROUND.
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302. COME ON, STOP CRAPPING
AROUND.
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303. > GOOD SUNDAY MORNING, I'M THE
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304. > GOOD SUNDAY MORNING, I'M THE
REVEREND AL SHARPTON.
THE NEW YORK PRIMARY IS THIS
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305. REVEREND AL SHARPTON.
THE NEW YORK PRIMARY IS THIS
TUESDAY.
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306. THE NEW YORK PRIMARY IS THIS
TUESDAY.
AND STATES ACROSS THE COUNTRY
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307. TUESDAY.
AND STATES ACROSS THE COUNTRY
HAVE SET UP THESE NEW VOTER I.D.
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308. AND STATES ACROSS THE COUNTRY
HAVE SET UP THESE NEW VOTER I.D.
LAWS.
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309. HAVE SET UP THESE NEW VOTER I.D.
LAWS.
THE REAL PURPOSE IS TO
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310. LAWS.
THE REAL PURPOSE IS TO
DISENFRENCHFRIES PEOPLE.
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311. THE REAL PURPOSE IS TO
DISENFRENCHFRIES PEOPLE.
LET'S TALK ABOUT IT.
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312. LET'S TALK ABOUT IT.
JOINING ME NOW TO TALK ABOUT
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313. JOINING ME NOW TO TALK ABOUT
THE NEW LAWS IS CHRISTEE JACOBS.
MY NAME IS NOT CHRISTEE IT'S
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314. THE NEW LAWS IS CHRISTEE JACOBS.
MY NAME IS NOT CHRISTEE IT'S
CHRISTIE.
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315. MY NAME IS NOT CHRISTEE IT'S
CHRISTIE.
NOT IN MY CHURCH.
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316. CHRISTIE.
NOT IN MY CHURCH.
SO THIS WEEK ARE THE NEW LAWS TO
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317. NOT IN MY CHURCH.
SO THIS WEEK ARE THE NEW LAWS TO
SUPPRESS PEOPLE FROM VOTING?
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318. SO THIS WEEK ARE THE NEW LAWS TO
SUPPRESS PEOPLE FROM VOTING?
ABSOLUTELY.
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319. SUPPRESS PEOPLE FROM VOTING?
ABSOLUTELY.
AND WHAT DO THEY NEED OUR I.D.
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320. ABSOLUTELY.
AND WHAT DO THEY NEED OUR I.D.
FOR ALL OF A SUDDEN?
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321. AND WHAT DO THEY NEED OUR I.D.
FOR ALL OF A SUDDEN?
USUALLY THEY SKIP THAT PART AND
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322. FOR ALL OF A SUDDEN?
USUALLY THEY SKIP THAT PART AND
SAY, SIR, PLEASE STEP OUT OF THE
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323. USUALLY THEY SKIP THAT PART AND
SAY, SIR, PLEASE STEP OUT OF THE
VEHICLE.
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324. SAY, SIR, PLEASE STEP OUT OF THE
VEHICLE.
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325. VEHICLE.
THEY SAY THESE LAWS WILL STOP
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326. THEY SAY THESE LAWS WILL STOP
VOTER FRAUD.
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327. THEY SAY THESE LAWS WILL STOP
VOTER FRAUD.
IS THAT A PROBLEM IN THIS
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328. VOTER FRAUD.
IS THAT A PROBLEM IN THIS
COUNTRY?
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329. IS THAT A PROBLEM IN THIS
COUNTRY?
ABSOLUTELY.
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330. COUNTRY?
ABSOLUTELY.
I HAVE MOTHERS CALLING ME ALL
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331. ABSOLUTELY.
I HAVE MOTHERS CALLING ME ALL
THE TIME SAYING, HELP ME,
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332. I HAVE MOTHERS CALLING ME ALL
THE TIME SAYING, HELP ME,
REVEREND SHARPTON, MY SON IS OUT
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333. THE TIME SAYING, HELP ME,
REVEREND SHARPTON, MY SON IS OUT
THERE ON THE STREETS COMMITTING
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334. REVEREND SHARPTON, MY SON IS OUT
THERE ON THE STREETS COMMITTING
VOTER FRAUD.
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335. THERE ON THE STREETS COMMITTING
VOTER FRAUD.
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336. VOTER FRAUD.
REALLY?
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337. REALLY?
NO.
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338. REALLY?
NO.
THANK YOU FOR JOINING US,
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339. NO.
THANK YOU FOR JOINING US,
CHRISTEE JACOBS.
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340. THANK YOU FOR JOINING US,
CHRISTEE JACOBS.
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341. CHRISTEE JACOBS.
NOW, ON TO THE DEMOCRATIC
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342. NOW, ON TO THE DEMOCRATIC
PRIMARY.
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343. NOW, ON TO THE DEMOCRATIC
PRIMARY.
DESPITE BERNIE SANDERS WIN THIS
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344. PRIMARY.
DESPITE BERNIE SANDERS WIN THIS
WEEK IN WISCONSIN, IT'S NO
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345. DESPITE BERNIE SANDERS WIN THIS
WEEK IN WISCONSIN, IT'S NO
SECRET THAT HILLARY CLINTON IS
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346. WEEK IN WISCONSIN, IT'S NO
SECRET THAT HILLARY CLINTON IS
RAISINETS - EXCUSE ME,
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347. SECRET THAT HILLARY CLINTON IS
RAISINETS - EXCUSE ME,
RESONATING MORE WITH BLACK
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348. RAISINETS - EXCUSE ME,
RESONATING MORE WITH BLACK
VOTERS.
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349. RESONATING MORE WITH BLACK
VOTERS.
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350. VOTERS.
HERE TO GIVE US SOME INSIGHT IS
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351. HERE TO GIVE US SOME INSIGHT IS
MY PERSONAL STATISTICAL ANALYST,
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352. HERE TO GIVE US SOME INSIGHT IS
MY PERSONAL STATISTICAL ANALYST,
MR. CHARLES RICHARDS.
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353. MY PERSONAL STATISTICAL ANALYST,
MR. CHARLES RICHARDS.
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354. MR. CHARLES RICHARDS.
HOW ARE YOU DOING?
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355. HOW ARE YOU DOING?
GOOD MORNING, REVEREND.
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356. HOW ARE YOU DOING?
GOOD MORNING, REVEREND.
PLEASE DON'T TAKE THIS THE WRONG
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357. GOOD MORNING, REVEREND.
PLEASE DON'T TAKE THIS THE WRONG
WAY, BUT I EXPECTED YOU TO BE
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358. PLEASE DON'T TAKE THIS THE WRONG
WAY, BUT I EXPECTED YOU TO BE
SKINNIER.
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359. WAY, BUT I EXPECTED YOU TO BE
SKINNIER.
I MEAN YOU WORKED REALLY HARD TO
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360. SKINNIER.
I MEAN YOU WORKED REALLY HARD TO
LOSE ALL THAT WEIGHT.
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361. I MEAN YOU WORKED REALLY HARD TO
LOSE ALL THAT WEIGHT.
IT'S A SHAME TO SEE YOU GAINED
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362. LOSE ALL THAT WEIGHT.
IT'S A SHAME TO SEE YOU GAINED
IT BACK.
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363. IT'S A SHAME TO SEE YOU GAINED
IT BACK.
WELL, FRANKLY CHARLES, I LIKE
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364. IT BACK.
WELL, FRANKLY CHARLES, I LIKE
MYSELF THIS WAY.
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365. WELL, FRANKLY CHARLES, I LIKE
MYSELF THIS WAY.
PEOPLE SAY I LOOK YOUNGER.
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366. MYSELF THIS WAY.
PEOPLE SAY I LOOK YOUNGER.
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367. PEOPLE SAY I LOOK YOUNGER.
NOW, THE BLACK VOTE IS CRUCIAL
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368. NOW, THE BLACK VOTE IS CRUCIAL
THIS ELECTION.
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369. NOW, THE BLACK VOTE IS CRUCIAL
THIS ELECTION.
AND YOU'VE CREATED AN AL GORE
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370. THIS ELECTION.
AND YOU'VE CREATED AN AL GORE
RHYTHM TO SHOW WHERE OUR
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371. AND YOU'VE CREATED AN AL GORE
RHYTHM TO SHOW WHERE OUR
COMMUNITY IS MEETING?
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372. RHYTHM TO SHOW WHERE OUR
COMMUNITY IS MEETING?
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373. COMMUNITY IS MEETING?
THAT'S RIGHT, MY ALGORITHM IS
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374. THAT'S RIGHT, MY ALGORITHM IS
CALLED THE BLACK APPROVAL
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375. THAT'S RIGHT, MY ALGORITHM IS
CALLED THE BLACK APPROVAL
RATINGS SCALE.
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376. CALLED THE BLACK APPROVAL
RATINGS SCALE.
EACH CANDIDATE GETS A NUMBER
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377. RATINGS SCALE.
EACH CANDIDATE GETS A NUMBER
BETWEEN ONE AND 10 BASED ON
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378. EACH CANDIDATE GETS A NUMBER
BETWEEN ONE AND 10 BASED ON
THEIR STANDING IN THE BLACK
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379. BETWEEN ONE AND 10 BASED ON
THEIR STANDING IN THE BLACK
COMMUNITY.
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380. THEIR STANDING IN THE BLACK
COMMUNITY.
OKAY, LET'S START WITH
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381. COMMUNITY.
OKAY, LET'S START WITH
HILLARY CLINTON.
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382. OKAY, LET'S START WITH
HILLARY CLINTON.
SECRETARY CLINTON GETS A 7.2
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383. HILLARY CLINTON.
SECRETARY CLINTON GETS A 7.2
RATING WITH BLACK VOTERS BECAUSE
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384. SECRETARY CLINTON GETS A 7.2
RATING WITH BLACK VOTERS BECAUSE
HER HUSBAND IS BILL CLINTON, WHO
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385. RATING WITH BLACK VOTERS BECAUSE
HER HUSBAND IS BILL CLINTON, WHO
DESPITE RECENT OUTBURSTS, IS
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386. HER HUSBAND IS BILL CLINTON, WHO
DESPITE RECENT OUTBURSTS, IS
BELOVED IN THE AFRICAN-AMERICAN
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387. DESPITE RECENT OUTBURSTS, IS
BELOVED IN THE AFRICAN-AMERICAN
COMMUNITY.
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388. BELOVED IN THE AFRICAN-AMERICAN
COMMUNITY.
OH, ABSOLUTELY.
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389. COMMUNITY.
OH, ABSOLUTELY.
BILL CLINTON COULD WALK INTO THE
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390. OH, ABSOLUTELY.
BILL CLINTON COULD WALK INTO THE
BET AWARDS AFTER PARTY, SIT AT
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391. BILL CLINTON COULD WALK INTO THE
BET AWARDS AFTER PARTY, SIT AT
RIHANNA'S TABLE, AND ORDER A
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392. BET AWARDS AFTER PARTY, SIT AT
RIHANNA'S TABLE, AND ORDER A
BOWL OF MAC & CHEESE AND
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393. RIHANNA'S TABLE, AND ORDER A
BOWL OF MAC & CHEESE AND
EVERYONE WOULD SAY, THAT SEEMS
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394. BOWL OF MAC & CHEESE AND
EVERYONE WOULD SAY, THAT SEEMS
RIGHT.
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395. EVERYONE WOULD SAY, THAT SEEMS
RIGHT.
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396. RIGHT.
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397. OKAY WELL, WHAT ABOUT
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398. OKAY WELL, WHAT ABOUT
BERNIE SANDERS?
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399. OKAY WELL, WHAT ABOUT
BERNIE SANDERS?
SENATOR SANDERS GETS A SCORE
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400. BERNIE SANDERS?
SENATOR SANDERS GETS A SCORE
OF 6.3.
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401. SENATOR SANDERS GETS A SCORE
OF 6.3.
YES, HE WAS ACTIVE IN THE CIVIL
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402. OF 6.3.
YES, HE WAS ACTIVE IN THE CIVIL
RIGHTS MOVEMENT, BUT FOR SOME
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403. YES, HE WAS ACTIVE IN THE CIVIL
RIGHTS MOVEMENT, BUT FOR SOME
REASON, HE SEEMS LIKE THE KIND
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404. RIGHTS MOVEMENT, BUT FOR SOME
REASON, HE SEEMS LIKE THE KIND
OF PERSON WHO STILL CALLS
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405. REASON, HE SEEMS LIKE THE KIND
OF PERSON WHO STILL CALLS
MUHAMMAD ALI CASCIUS.
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406. OF PERSON WHO STILL CALLS
MUHAMMAD ALI CASCIUS.
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407. MUHAMMAD ALI CASCIUS.
ABSOLUTELY.
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408. ABSOLUTELY.
ALSO, HE'S FROM VERMONT.
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409. ABSOLUTELY.
ALSO, HE'S FROM VERMONT.
IT'S A BEAUTIFUL STATE, BUT
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410. ALSO, HE'S FROM VERMONT.
IT'S A BEAUTIFUL STATE, BUT
NEVER HAS A BLACK PERSON SAID
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411. IT'S A BEAUTIFUL STATE, BUT
NEVER HAS A BLACK PERSON SAID
HEY, I GOT TIME OFF THIS
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412. NEVER HAS A BLACK PERSON SAID
HEY, I GOT TIME OFF THIS
WEEKEND.
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413. HEY, I GOT TIME OFF THIS
WEEKEND.
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414. WEEKEND.
ANYONE WANT TO GO TO VERMONT?
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415. ANYONE WANT TO GO TO VERMONT?
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416. LET'S GO OVER TO THE REPUBLICAN
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417. LET'S GO OVER TO THE REPUBLICAN
SIDE.
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418. LET'S GO OVER TO THE REPUBLICAN
SIDE.
HOW ABOUT TED&CRUZ?
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419. SIDE.
HOW ABOUT TED&CRUZ?
SENATOR CRUZ GETS A 2.1 ON
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420. HOW ABOUT TED&CRUZ?
SENATOR CRUZ GETS A 2.1 ON
THE BLACK APPROVAL RATING SCALE.
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421. SENATOR CRUZ GETS A 2.1 ON
THE BLACK APPROVAL RATING SCALE.
BECAUSE LOOK AT HIM, YOU JUST
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422. THE BLACK APPROVAL RATING SCALE.
BECAUSE LOOK AT HIM, YOU JUST
KNOW HE'S UP TO SOMETHING.
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423. BECAUSE LOOK AT HIM, YOU JUST
KNOW HE'S UP TO SOMETHING.
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424. KNOW HE'S UP TO SOMETHING.
INDEED, HE'S A SNEAKY LITTLE
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425. INDEED, HE'S A SNEAKY LITTLE
MOUSE.
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426. INDEED, HE'S A SNEAKY LITTLE
MOUSE.
HOW ABOUT DONALD TRUMP?
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427. MOUSE.
HOW ABOUT DONALD TRUMP?
COME ON, NOW, COME ON, NOW.
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428. HOW ABOUT DONALD TRUMP?
COME ON, NOW, COME ON, NOW.
COME ON, NOW.
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429. COME ON, NOW, COME ON, NOW.
COME ON, NOW.
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430. COME ON, NOW.
RIGHT NOW, DONALD TRUMP HAS THE
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431. RIGHT NOW, DONALD TRUMP HAS THE
BLACK APPROVAL RATING OF
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432. RIGHT NOW, DONALD TRUMP HAS THE
BLACK APPROVAL RATING OF
NEGATIVE 1,048.
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433. BLACK APPROVAL RATING OF
NEGATIVE 1,048.
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434. NEGATIVE 1,048.
BUT THAT COULD GO DOWN.
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435. BUT THAT COULD GO DOWN.
ABSOLUTELY.
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436. ABSOLUTELY.
BLACK PEOPLE SHOULD NEVER TRUST
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437. ABSOLUTELY.
BLACK PEOPLE SHOULD NEVER TRUST
A WHITE PERSON WHOSE HAIR IS
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438. BLACK PEOPLE SHOULD NEVER TRUST
A WHITE PERSON WHOSE HAIR IS
MORE PROCESSED THAN THEIRS.
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439. A WHITE PERSON WHOSE HAIR IS
MORE PROCESSED THAN THEIRS.
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440. MORE PROCESSED THAN THEIRS.
AND HOW IS OBAMA DOING?
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441. AND HOW IS OBAMA DOING?
NOT BAD.
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442. AND HOW IS OBAMA DOING?
NOT BAD.
HIS NUMBERS CONTINUE TO RISE.
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443. NOT BAD.
HIS NUMBERS CONTINUE TO RISE.
HE WAS AT A 16, BUT HE JUST WENT
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444. HIS NUMBERS CONTINUE TO RISE.
HE WAS AT A 16, BUT HE JUST WENT
UP TO A 22.
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445. HE WAS AT A 16, BUT HE JUST WENT
UP TO A 22.
I DON'T EVEN KNOW WHAT HE DID.
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446. UP TO A 22.
I DON'T EVEN KNOW WHAT HE DID.
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447. I DON'T EVEN KNOW WHAT HE DID.
WELL EITHER WAY, IT'S PHANTOM
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448. WELL EITHER WAY, IT'S PHANTOM
NOMINAL.
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449. WELL EITHER WAY, IT'S PHANTOM
NOMINAL.
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450. NOMINAL.
IT'S PRONOUNCED PHENOMENAL.
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451. IT'S PRONOUNCED PHENOMENAL.
WHAT'S GOING ON WITH YOU TODAY,
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452. IT'S PRONOUNCED PHENOMENAL.
WHAT'S GOING ON WITH YOU TODAY,
AL?
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453. WHAT'S GOING ON WITH YOU TODAY,
AL?
YOU USUALLY ARE VERY A SMART
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454. AL?
YOU USUALLY ARE VERY A SMART
PERSON.
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455. YOU USUALLY ARE VERY A SMART
PERSON.
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456. PERSON.
I DON'T KNOW.
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457. I DON'T KNOW.
I THINK ALL THESE WEIGHT
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458. I DON'T KNOW.
I THINK ALL THESE WEIGHT
FLUCTUATIONS IS MESSING WITH MY
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459. I THINK ALL THESE WEIGHT
FLUCTUATIONS IS MESSING WITH MY
BRAIN.
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460. FLUCTUATIONS IS MESSING WITH MY
BRAIN.
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461. BRAIN.
WELL LET'S TAKE A BREAK.
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462. WELL LET'S TAKE A BREAK.
MORE WITH CHARLES, WHEN WE
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463. WELL LET'S TAKE A BREAK.
MORE WITH CHARLES, WHEN WE
RETURN ON POLITICS NATION.
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464. MORE WITH CHARLES, WHEN WE
RETURN ON POLITICS NATION.
I'LL TALK TO YOU.
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465. RETURN ON POLITICS NATION.
I'LL TALK TO YOU.
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466. > WELCOME TO HENRY THE EIGHTH,
THE EXPERIENCE.
IN A MOMENT, AN INTERACTIVE
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467. THE EXPERIENCE.
IN A MOMENT, AN INTERACTIVE
HOLOGRAM OF HIS MAJESTY WILL
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468. IN A MOMENT, AN INTERACTIVE
HOLOGRAM OF HIS MAJESTY WILL
APPEAR TO ANSWER YOUR QUESTIONS
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469. HOLOGRAM OF HIS MAJESTY WILL
APPEAR TO ANSWER YOUR QUESTIONS
ABOUT HIS LIFE AND TIMES.
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470. APPEAR TO ANSWER YOUR QUESTIONS
ABOUT HIS LIFE AND TIMES.
WITHOUT FURTHER ADO, HIS
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471. ABOUT HIS LIFE AND TIMES.
WITHOUT FURTHER ADO, HIS
MAJESTY.
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472. MAJESTY.
LOYAL SUBJECTS, I AM KING
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473. LOYAL SUBJECTS, I AM KING
HENRY THE EIGHTH.
I AM REMEMBERED TODAY FOR
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474. HENRY THE EIGHTH.
I AM REMEMBERED TODAY FOR
TAKING SIX WIVES.
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475. I AM REMEMBERED TODAY FOR
TAKING SIX WIVES.
NONE OF THEM GAVE ME A MALE
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476. TAKING SIX WIVES.
NONE OF THEM GAVE ME A MALE
HEIR.
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477. NONE OF THEM GAVE ME A MALE
HEIR.
ASK ME WHAT YOU WOULD.
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478. HEIR.
ASK ME WHAT YOU WOULD.
THIS IS SO COOL.
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479. ASK ME WHAT YOU WOULD.
THIS IS SO COOL.
WHAT DID YOU EAT BACK THEN?
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480. THIS IS SO COOL.
WHAT DID YOU EAT BACK THEN?
IN MY TIME NOBLES WASHED
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481. WHAT DID YOU EAT BACK THEN?
IN MY TIME NOBLES WASHED
FEASTED ON BANQUETS OF ROASTED
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482. IN MY TIME NOBLES WASHED
FEASTED ON BANQUETS OF ROASTED
MEATS, WASHED DOWN WITH HEARTY
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483. FEASTED ON BANQUETS OF ROASTED
MEATS, WASHED DOWN WITH HEARTY
ALES.
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484. MEATS, WASHED DOWN WITH HEARTY
ALES.
THANK YOU, YOUR HEINESS.
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485. ALES.
THANK YOU, YOUR HEINESS.
BABE, ASK HIM A QUESTION.
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486. THANK YOU, YOUR HEINESS.
BABE, ASK HIM A QUESTION.
HOW BIG WAS THE CASTLE?
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487. BABE, ASK HIM A QUESTION.
HOW BIG WAS THE CASTLE?
BEAR ME A SON.
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488. HOW BIG WAS THE CASTLE?
BEAR ME A SON.
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489. BEAR ME A SON.
BEAR YOU A SON?
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490. BEAR YOU A SON?
BEAR ME A SON!
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491. BEAR YOU A SON?
BEAR ME A SON!
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492. BEAR ME A SON!
WHY IS HE DOING THIS?
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493. WHY IS HE DOING THIS?
WHAT?
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494. WHY IS HE DOING THIS?
WHAT?
IT'S HISTORICALLY ACCURATE.
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495. WHAT?
IT'S HISTORICALLY ACCURATE.
THE ONLY SOUNDS I WISH TO
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496. IT'S HISTORICALLY ACCURATE.
THE ONLY SOUNDS I WISH TO
HEAR FROM A WOMAN'S MOUTH IS THE
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497. THE ONLY SOUNDS I WISH TO
HEAR FROM A WOMAN'S MOUTH IS THE
SCREAMS OF LABOR, AS YOU BEAR ME
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498. HEAR FROM A WOMAN'S MOUTH IS THE
SCREAMS OF LABOR, AS YOU BEAR ME
A SON!
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499. SCREAMS OF LABOR, AS YOU BEAR ME
A SON!
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500. A SON!
HE'S SPITTING WHEN HE TALKS
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501. HE'S SPITTING WHEN HE TALKS
AND THERE'S LIKE HOLOGRAM SPIT.
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502. HE'S SPITTING WHEN HE TALKS
AND THERE'S LIKE HOLOGRAM SPIT.
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503. AND THERE'S LIKE HOLOGRAM SPIT.
WHAT A NOVELTY, HUH?
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504. WHAT A NOVELTY, HUH?
THE NEXT THING YOU KNOW, YOU'LL
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505. WHAT A NOVELTY, HUH?
THE NEXT THING YOU KNOW, YOU'LL
BE ABLE TO WATCH A MOVIE ON YOUR
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506. THE NEXT THING YOU KNOW, YOU'LL
BE ABLE TO WATCH A MOVIE ON YOUR
PHONE.
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507. BE ABLE TO WATCH A MOVIE ON YOUR
PHONE.
TODD, YOU CAN ALREADY DO
Copy !req
508. PHONE.
TODD, YOU CAN ALREADY DO
THAT.
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509. TODD, YOU CAN ALREADY DO
THAT.
YOU JUST HAVE TO GET A NEW
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510. THAT.
YOU JUST HAVE TO GET A NEW
PHONE.
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511. YOU JUST HAVE TO GET A NEW
PHONE.
COME ON.
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512. PHONE.
COME ON.
BEAR ME A SON, OR I SHALL
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513. COME ON.
BEAR ME A SON, OR I SHALL
HAVE YOUR HEAD.
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514. BEAR ME A SON, OR I SHALL
HAVE YOUR HEAD.
MY LEIGE, WHAT WAS YOUR
Copy !req
515. HAVE YOUR HEAD.
MY LEIGE, WHAT WAS YOUR
RELATIONSHIP WITH SPAIN LIKE?
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516. MY LEIGE, WHAT WAS YOUR
RELATIONSHIP WITH SPAIN LIKE?
COMPLICATED.
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517. RELATIONSHIP WITH SPAIN LIKE?
COMPLICATED.
BEAR ME A SON.
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518. COMPLICATED.
BEAR ME A SON.
BEAR ME A SON BUT BATHE FIRST,
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519. BEAR ME A SON.
BEAR ME A SON BUT BATHE FIRST,
YOU HAVE A STENCH.
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520. BEAR ME A SON BUT BATHE FIRST,
YOU HAVE A STENCH.
SUCH A PIG.
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521. YOU HAVE A STENCH.
SUCH A PIG.
IF YOU BEAR ME A DAUGHTER,
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522. SUCH A PIG.
IF YOU BEAR ME A DAUGHTER,
SHE SHALL SLEEP IN A CRIB OF
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523. IF YOU BEAR ME A DAUGHTER,
SHE SHALL SLEEP IN A CRIB OF
IRON.
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524. SHE SHALL SLEEP IN A CRIB OF
IRON.
I'M GOING TO THE GIFT SHOP.
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525. IRON.
I'M GOING TO THE GIFT SHOP.
WE'RE NOT BUYING ANY MORE
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526. I'M GOING TO THE GIFT SHOP.
WE'RE NOT BUYING ANY MORE
GEODES, THEY'RE NOT RARE.
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527. WE'RE NOT BUYING ANY MORE
GEODES, THEY'RE NOT RARE.
NO DEBATING.
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528. GEODES, THEY'RE NOT RARE.
NO DEBATING.
FORGET BATHING, I CAN
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529. NO DEBATING.
FORGET BATHING, I CAN
TOLERATE YOUR STENCH.
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530. FORGET BATHING, I CAN
TOLERATE YOUR STENCH.
HEY — SORRY, HELLO.
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531. TOLERATE YOUR STENCH.
HEY — SORRY, HELLO.
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532. HEY — SORRY, HELLO.
A FOOL, AMUSE ME.
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533. A FOOL, AMUSE ME.
DANCE FOR ME, SIMPLETON.
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534. A FOOL, AMUSE ME.
DANCE FOR ME, SIMPLETON.
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535. DANCE FOR ME, SIMPLETON.
DANCE FOR ME WITH YOUR ENORMOUS
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536. DANCE FOR ME WITH YOUR ENORMOUS
HEAD.
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537. DANCE FOR ME WITH YOUR ENORMOUS
HEAD.
NO THANKS.
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538. HEAD.
NO THANKS.
NO THANK YOU.
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539. NO THANKS.
NO THANK YOU.
COME ON, YOU FOOL.
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540. NO THANK YOU.
COME ON, YOU FOOL.
NO.
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541. COME ON, YOU FOOL.
NO.
COME ON, YOU OTHER FOOL.
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542. NO.
COME ON, YOU OTHER FOOL.
I'M NOT A FOOL.
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543. COME ON, YOU OTHER FOOL.
I'M NOT A FOOL.
OKAY.
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544. I'M NOT A FOOL.
OKAY.
MY MOM'S DAY OUT GROUP.
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545. OKAY.
MY MOM'S DAY OUT GROUP.
FOLLOW ME.
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546. MY MOM'S DAY OUT GROUP.
FOLLOW ME.
YOU, YOU.
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547. FOLLOW ME.
YOU, YOU.
BARE ME A SON.
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548. YOU, YOU.
BARE ME A SON.
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549. BARE ME A SON.
COME BACK.
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550. COME BACK.
OPEN YOUR MOISTENED LOINS FOR
Copy !req
551. COME BACK.
OPEN YOUR MOISTENED LOINS FOR
ME.
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552. OPEN YOUR MOISTENED LOINS FOR
ME.
TAKE MY SEED.
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553. ME.
TAKE MY SEED.
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554. TAKE MY SEED.
HELLO.
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555. HELLO.
I'VE ONLY SEEN YOUR TYPE IN
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556. HELLO.
I'VE ONLY SEEN YOUR TYPE IN
PAINTINGS.
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557. I'VE ONLY SEEN YOUR TYPE IN
PAINTINGS.
AND GOOD-BYE.
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558. PAINTINGS.
AND GOOD-BYE.
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559. AND GOOD-BYE.
QUESTION.
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560. QUESTION.
WHERE DID YOU GO TO THE BATHROOM
Copy !req
561. QUESTION.
WHERE DID YOU GO TO THE BATHROOM
IN THE CASTLE?
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562. WHERE DID YOU GO TO THE BATHROOM
IN THE CASTLE?
BE STILL YOUR TONGUE.
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563. IN THE CASTLE?
BE STILL YOUR TONGUE.
I ONLY WISH TO SPEAK TO THIS
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564. BE STILL YOUR TONGUE.
I ONLY WISH TO SPEAK TO THIS
DIVINE CREATURE.
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565. I ONLY WISH TO SPEAK TO THIS
DIVINE CREATURE.
OH, I LONG TO SEE YOUR BOSOM
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566. DIVINE CREATURE.
OH, I LONG TO SEE YOUR BOSOM
SWOLLEN WITH MY SON'S BREAKFAST.
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567. OH, I LONG TO SEE YOUR BOSOM
SWOLLEN WITH MY SON'S BREAKFAST.
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568. SWOLLEN WITH MY SON'S BREAKFAST.
TWO AMPLE JUGS TO FEED THE
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569. TWO AMPLE JUGS TO FEED THE
FUTURE KING, I MUST HAVE YOU
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570. TWO AMPLE JUGS TO FEED THE
FUTURE KING, I MUST HAVE YOU
BEAR ME A SON.
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571. FUTURE KING, I MUST HAVE YOU
BEAR ME A SON.
THANK YOU?
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572. BEAR ME A SON.
THANK YOU?
COME ON, BABE, I WANT TO SEE
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573. THANK YOU?
COME ON, BABE, I WANT TO SEE
THE TORTURE STUFF.
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574. COME ON, BABE, I WANT TO SEE
THE TORTURE STUFF.
PLUS, I THINK THERE'S SOMETHING
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575. THE TORTURE STUFF.
PLUS, I THINK THERE'S SOMETHING
WRONG WITH THIS HOLOGRAM.
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576. PLUS, I THINK THERE'S SOMETHING
WRONG WITH THIS HOLOGRAM.
WHOOPS.
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577. WRONG WITH THIS HOLOGRAM.
WHOOPS.
OKAY, WELL IT LOOKS LIKE THE
Copy !req
578. WHOOPS.
OKAY, WELL IT LOOKS LIKE THE
KING REQUIRES A REBOOT OF HIS
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579. OKAY, WELL IT LOOKS LIKE THE
KING REQUIRES A REBOOT OF HIS
ROYAL SOFTWARE.
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580. KING REQUIRES A REBOOT OF HIS
ROYAL SOFTWARE.
IN THE MEANTIME, FEEL FREE TO
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581. ROYAL SOFTWARE.
IN THE MEANTIME, FEEL FREE TO
SIT ON THE THRONE AND TAKE A
Copy !req
582. IN THE MEANTIME, FEEL FREE TO
SIT ON THE THRONE AND TAKE A
PHOTOGRAPH IF YOU WANT.
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583. SIT ON THE THRONE AND TAKE A
PHOTOGRAPH IF YOU WANT.
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584. PHOTOGRAPH IF YOU WANT.
ME FIRST.
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585. ME FIRST.
DO A SERIOUS PHOTO AND THEN DO A
Copy !req
586. ME FIRST.
DO A SERIOUS PHOTO AND THEN DO A
GOOFY ONE, OKAY?
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587. DO A SERIOUS PHOTO AND THEN DO A
GOOFY ONE, OKAY?
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588. GOOFY ONE, OKAY?
BEAR ME A SON.
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589. BEAR ME A SON.
BEAR ME A SON.
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590. BEAR ME A SON.
BEAR ME A SON.
OH, MY GOD.
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591. BEAR ME A SON.
OH, MY GOD.
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592. > YOU'RE WATCHING THE
GAME SHOW NETWORK.
AT 10:00, IT'S "WHITE JEOPARDY."
Copy !req
593. GAME SHOW NETWORK.
AT 10:00, IT'S "WHITE JEOPARDY."
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594. AT 10:00, IT'S "WHITE JEOPARDY."
BUT UP NOW, IT'S
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595. BUT UP NOW, IT'S
"MATCH FINDERS."
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596. "MATCH FINDERS."
HELLO, AND WELCOME TO
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597. HELLO, AND WELCOME TO
"MATCH FINDERS."
I'M YOUR HOST,
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598. "MATCH FINDERS."
I'M YOUR HOST,
EMERIL MIKE DISGAIN.
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599. I'M YOUR HOST,
EMERIL MIKE DISGAIN.
AND I'M SORRY I'M LATE, BUT A
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600. EMERIL MIKE DISGAIN.
AND I'M SORRY I'M LATE, BUT A
TEENAGER RAN UP BEHIND ME AND
Copy !req
601. AND I'M SORRY I'M LATE, BUT A
TEENAGER RAN UP BEHIND ME AND
PUNCHED ME IN THE BACK OF THE
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602. TEENAGER RAN UP BEHIND ME AND
PUNCHED ME IN THE BACK OF THE
HEAD.
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603. PUNCHED ME IN THE BACK OF THE
HEAD.
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604. HEAD.
HOPE YOU GOT INTO THE CRIPS,
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605. HOPE YOU GOT INTO THE CRIPS,
SON.
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606. HOPE YOU GOT INTO THE CRIPS,
SON.
Copy !req
607. LET'S MEET OUR LUCKY
BACHELORETTE.
HI, EMERIL.
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608. BACHELORETTE.
HI, EMERIL.
HER NAME IS LISA G.
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609. HI, EMERIL.
HER NAME IS LISA G.
SHE'S 23 YEARS OLD, AND SHE'S A
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610. HER NAME IS LISA G.
SHE'S 23 YEARS OLD, AND SHE'S A
LOT OF FUN.
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611. SHE'S 23 YEARS OLD, AND SHE'S A
LOT OF FUN.
I'M ACTUALLY 33, NOT 23.
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612. LOT OF FUN.
I'M ACTUALLY 33, NOT 23.
AND YOU'RE NOT A LOT OF FUN,
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613. I'M ACTUALLY 33, NOT 23.
AND YOU'RE NOT A LOT OF FUN,
EITHER.
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614. AND YOU'RE NOT A LOT OF FUN,
EITHER.
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615. EITHER.
AND I'M TRYING TO SELL A
Copy !req
616. AND I'M TRYING TO SELL A
LIFESTYLE HERE.
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617. AND I'M TRYING TO SELL A
LIFESTYLE HERE.
LET'S MEET OUR ELIGIBLE
Copy !req
618. LIFESTYLE HERE.
LET'S MEET OUR ELIGIBLE
BACHELORS.
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619. BACHELORS.
TODD IS AN INSTAGRAM MODEL WITH
Copy !req
620. TODD IS AN INSTAGRAM MODEL WITH
A GLASS EYE.
I DIDN'T KNOW YOU WERE GONNA
Copy !req
621. A GLASS EYE.
I DIDN'T KNOW YOU WERE GONNA
READ THAT OUT LOUD.
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622. I DIDN'T KNOW YOU WERE GONNA
READ THAT OUT LOUD.
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623. READ THAT OUT LOUD.
JASON IS AN ELECTRONIC
Copy !req
624. JASON IS AN ELECTRONIC
SPECIALIST AT BEST BUY.
Copy !req
625. JASON IS AN ELECTRONIC
SPECIALIST AT BEST BUY.
I'LL HOOK YOU UP, AND THEN
Copy !req
626. SPECIALIST AT BEST BUY.
I'LL HOOK YOU UP, AND THEN
I'LL HOOK UP WITH YOU.
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627. I'LL HOOK YOU UP, AND THEN
I'LL HOOK UP WITH YOU.
DAMN.
Copy !req
628. I'LL HOOK UP WITH YOU.
DAMN.
Copy !req
629. DAMN.
AND BENEDICT IS A "SMART
Copy !req
630. AND BENEDICT IS A "SMART
PROFESSOR FROM GERMANY."
Copy !req
631. AND BENEDICT IS A "SMART
PROFESSOR FROM GERMANY."
I WAS RAISED IN A HOUSE FULL
Copy !req
632. PROFESSOR FROM GERMANY."
I WAS RAISED IN A HOUSE FULL
OF WOMEN, SO AS YOU CAN IMAGINE,
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633. I WAS RAISED IN A HOUSE FULL
OF WOMEN, SO AS YOU CAN IMAGINE,
I KNOW MY WAY AROUND A WOMAN'S
Copy !req
634. OF WOMEN, SO AS YOU CAN IMAGINE,
I KNOW MY WAY AROUND A WOMAN'S
BODY.
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635. I KNOW MY WAY AROUND A WOMAN'S
BODY.
Copy !req
636. BODY.
ALL RIGHT.
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637. LISA, WHY DON'T YOU ASK THESE
BACHELORS THEIR FIRST QUESTION?
OKAY, I'M A GIRL THAT LIKES
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638. BACHELORS THEIR FIRST QUESTION?
OKAY, I'M A GIRL THAT LIKES
TO BE PAMPERED.
Copy !req
639. OKAY, I'M A GIRL THAT LIKES
TO BE PAMPERED.
HOW WOULD YOU MAKE SURE I'VE HAD
Copy !req
640. TO BE PAMPERED.
HOW WOULD YOU MAKE SURE I'VE HAD
A GOOD TIME ON OUR FIRST DATE?
Copy !req
641. HOW WOULD YOU MAKE SURE I'VE HAD
A GOOD TIME ON OUR FIRST DATE?
I WOULD TAKE YOU TO
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642. A GOOD TIME ON OUR FIRST DATE?
I WOULD TAKE YOU TO
TREASURE BASE SPA FOR A MASSAGE,
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643. I WOULD TAKE YOU TO
TREASURE BASE SPA FOR A MASSAGE,
AND THEN A LATE DINNER AT
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644. TREASURE BASE SPA FOR A MASSAGE,
AND THEN A LATE DINNER AT
DORSIA.
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645. AND THEN A LATE DINNER AT
DORSIA.
AND IF THINGS GO WELL, YOU'D
Copy !req
646. DORSIA.
AND IF THINGS GO WELL, YOU'D
ALSO BE JOINING ME FOR
Copy !req
647. AND IF THINGS GO WELL, YOU'D
ALSO BE JOINING ME FOR
BREAKFAST.
Copy !req
648. ALSO BE JOINING ME FOR
BREAKFAST.
Copy !req
649. BREAKFAST.
OOH, I LIKE THAT.
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650. OOH, I LIKE THAT.
BACHELOR NUMBER TWO?
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651. OOH, I LIKE THAT.
BACHELOR NUMBER TWO?
I'D MAKE YOU DINNER AT HOME,
Copy !req
652. BACHELOR NUMBER TWO?
I'D MAKE YOU DINNER AT HOME,
AND THEN WE COULD WATCH A MOVIE.
Copy !req
653. I'D MAKE YOU DINNER AT HOME,
AND THEN WE COULD WATCH A MOVIE.
ALTHOUGH, IF THINGS GO WELL, I'M
Copy !req
654. AND THEN WE COULD WATCH A MOVIE.
ALTHOUGH, IF THINGS GO WELL, I'M
NOT SURE WE'D DO MUCH WATCHING.
Copy !req
655. ALTHOUGH, IF THINGS GO WELL, I'M
NOT SURE WE'D DO MUCH WATCHING.
Copy !req
656. NOT SURE WE'D DO MUCH WATCHING.
OOOOOH.
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657. OOOOOH.
I LIKE THE SOUND OF THAT.
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658. OOOOOH.
I LIKE THE SOUND OF THAT.
BACHELOR NUMBER 3, HOW WOULD YOU
Copy !req
659. I LIKE THE SOUND OF THAT.
BACHELOR NUMBER 3, HOW WOULD YOU
MAKE SURE I HAD A GOOD TIME?
Copy !req
660. BACHELOR NUMBER 3, HOW WOULD YOU
MAKE SURE I HAD A GOOD TIME?
WELL, FIRST I WOULD MASSAGE
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661. MAKE SURE I HAD A GOOD TIME?
WELL, FIRST I WOULD MASSAGE
YOUR LABIA MAJORA —
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662. WELL, FIRST I WOULD MASSAGE
YOUR LABIA MAJORA —
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663. YOUR LABIA MAJORA —
AND THEN, I WOULD MOUNT A
Copy !req
664. AND THEN, I WOULD MOUNT A
SUBTLE YET FOCUSED CAMPAIGN ON
Copy !req
665. AND THEN, I WOULD MOUNT A
SUBTLE YET FOCUSED CAMPAIGN ON
YOUR CLITORIS.
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666. SUBTLE YET FOCUSED CAMPAIGN ON
YOUR CLITORIS.
Copy !req
667. WELL, THERE ARE NO WRONG
ANSWERS ON "MATCH FINDERS."
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668. ANSWERS ON "MATCH FINDERS."
DAMN, THAT WAS CLOSE.
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669. DAMN, THAT WAS CLOSE.
I'M SORRY, DID SOMEONE SAY
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670. DAMN, THAT WAS CLOSE.
I'M SORRY, DID SOMEONE SAY
THAT ONE ALREADY?
Copy !req
671. I'M SORRY, DID SOMEONE SAY
THAT ONE ALREADY?
NO, SON, THEY SURE DIDN'T.
Copy !req
672. THAT ONE ALREADY?
NO, SON, THEY SURE DIDN'T.
Copy !req
673. NO, SON, THEY SURE DIDN'T.
GO AHEAD, LISA.
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674. GO AHEAD, LISA.
BACHELORS, I LOVE TO LEARN
Copy !req
675. GO AHEAD, LISA.
BACHELORS, I LOVE TO LEARN
NEW THINGS.
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676. BACHELORS, I LOVE TO LEARN
NEW THINGS.
TELL ME SOMETHING I DON'T KNOW.
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677. NEW THINGS.
TELL ME SOMETHING I DON'T KNOW.
YOU WOULDN'T GUESS IT BY
Copy !req
678. TELL ME SOMETHING I DON'T KNOW.
YOU WOULDN'T GUESS IT BY
LOOKING AT ME, BUT I'M ACTUALLY
Copy !req
679. YOU WOULDN'T GUESS IT BY
LOOKING AT ME, BUT I'M ACTUALLY
A PRETTY GOOD DANCER.
Copy !req
680. LOOKING AT ME, BUT I'M ACTUALLY
A PRETTY GOOD DANCER.
A-CHA-CHA CHA.
Copy !req
681. A PRETTY GOOD DANCER.
A-CHA-CHA CHA.
Copy !req
682. A-CHA-CHA CHA.
YOU WOULDN'T GUESS IT BY
Copy !req
683. YOU WOULDN'T GUESS IT BY
LOOKING AT IT, BUT THE HUMAN
Copy !req
684. YOU WOULDN'T GUESS IT BY
LOOKING AT IT, BUT THE HUMAN
VAGINA HAS THREE DISTINCT HOLES.
Copy !req
685. LOOKING AT IT, BUT THE HUMAN
VAGINA HAS THREE DISTINCT HOLES.
THE URETHRA, THE VULVA, AND, OF
Copy !req
686. VAGINA HAS THREE DISTINCT HOLES.
THE URETHRA, THE VULVA, AND, OF
COURSE, THE HOLE.
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687. THE URETHRA, THE VULVA, AND, OF
COURSE, THE HOLE.
Copy !req
688. COURSE, THE HOLE.
HEY, WHAT ARE YOU DOING?
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689. THIS IS A NICE GIRL.
AS I SAID, EMERIL, I GREW UP
THE ONLY BOY IN THE HOUSE FULL
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690. AS I SAID, EMERIL, I GREW UP
THE ONLY BOY IN THE HOUSE FULL
OF VERY, VERY OLD WOMEN.
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691. THE ONLY BOY IN THE HOUSE FULL
OF VERY, VERY OLD WOMEN.
THAT MAKES IT WORSE.
Copy !req
692. OF VERY, VERY OLD WOMEN.
THAT MAKES IT WORSE.
Copy !req
693. THAT MAKES IT WORSE.
BACHELOR NUMBER TWO, YOU
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694. BACHELOR NUMBER TWO, YOU
DIDN'T ANSWER THE QUESTION.
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695. BACHELOR NUMBER TWO, YOU
DIDN'T ANSWER THE QUESTION.
I YIELD ALL MY TIME TO THE
Copy !req
696. DIDN'T ANSWER THE QUESTION.
I YIELD ALL MY TIME TO THE
GENTLEMAN WITH THE PONYTAIL.
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697. I YIELD ALL MY TIME TO THE
GENTLEMAN WITH THE PONYTAIL.
Copy !req
698. GENTLEMAN WITH THE PONYTAIL.
WAIT A MINUTE, SON, YOU HAVE
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699. WAIT A MINUTE, SON, YOU HAVE
TO BE MORE SPECIFIC.
Copy !req
700. WAIT A MINUTE, SON, YOU HAVE
TO BE MORE SPECIFIC.
THERE'S TWO OF US UP HERE.
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701. TO BE MORE SPECIFIC.
THERE'S TWO OF US UP HERE.
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702. THERE'S TWO OF US UP HERE.
YEAH.
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703. YEAH.
BACHELOR NUMBER 3, WHAT WOULD
Copy !req
704. YEAH.
BACHELOR NUMBER 3, WHAT WOULD
YOU DO TO MAKE ME FEEL SPECIAL?
Copy !req
705. BACHELOR NUMBER 3, WHAT WOULD
YOU DO TO MAKE ME FEEL SPECIAL?
OH, YOU'RE JUST GOING TO WALK
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706. YOU DO TO MAKE ME FEEL SPECIAL?
OH, YOU'RE JUST GOING TO WALK
RIGHT INTO TRAFFIC?
Copy !req
707. OH, YOU'RE JUST GOING TO WALK
RIGHT INTO TRAFFIC?
Copy !req
708. RIGHT INTO TRAFFIC?
FIRST, I WOULD LAY DOWN A
Copy !req
709. FIRST, I WOULD LAY DOWN A
BEACH TOWEL ON TOP OF THE BED
Copy !req
710. FIRST, I WOULD LAY DOWN A
BEACH TOWEL ON TOP OF THE BED
SHEETS SO THAT YOU WOULDN'T FEEL
Copy !req
711. BEACH TOWEL ON TOP OF THE BED
SHEETS SO THAT YOU WOULDN'T FEEL
SELF-CONSCIOUS ABOUT —
Copy !req
712. SHEETS SO THAT YOU WOULDN'T FEEL
SELF-CONSCIOUS ABOUT —
Copy !req
713. SELF-CONSCIOUS ABOUT —
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714. YEAH, HAD TO DOWNLOAD A
Copy !req
715. YEAH, HAD TO DOWNLOAD A
BUZZER APP ON MY PHONE.
Copy !req
716. WHAT WOULD YOU SAY IS YOUR
BIGGEST FEAR.
A BEE IN MY HAT.
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717. BIGGEST FEAR.
A BEE IN MY HAT.
GHOSTS.
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718. A BEE IN MY HAT.
GHOSTS.
GETTING THROAT CANCER FROM
Copy !req
719. GHOSTS.
GETTING THROAT CANCER FROM
CUNNILINGUS.
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720. GETTING THROAT CANCER FROM
CUNNILINGUS.
I LIKE THAT, EXPLAIN.
Copy !req
721. CUNNILINGUS.
I LIKE THAT, EXPLAIN.
DON'T.
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722. I LIKE THAT, EXPLAIN.
DON'T.
MY DOCTOR SAYS IF I MUNCH ONE
Copy !req
723. DON'T.
MY DOCTOR SAYS IF I MUNCH ONE
MORE BOX.
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724. MY DOCTOR SAYS IF I MUNCH ONE
MORE BOX.
IF I SCARF ONE MORE CARPET, IF I
Copy !req
725. MORE BOX.
IF I SCARF ONE MORE CARPET, IF I
JUST CHOW DOWN ON ONE MORE DOOR
Copy !req
726. IF I SCARF ONE MORE CARPET, IF I
JUST CHOW DOWN ON ONE MORE DOOR
MAT, I'LL END UP JUST LIKE
Copy !req
727. JUST CHOW DOWN ON ONE MORE DOOR
MAT, I'LL END UP JUST LIKE
MICHAEL DOUGLAS.
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728. MICHAEL DOUGLAS IS ALIVE.
NO MAN IS ALIVE WHEN YOU TAKE
AWAY THAT WHICH HE LOVES.
Copy !req
729. NO MAN IS ALIVE WHEN YOU TAKE
AWAY THAT WHICH HE LOVES.
THAT'S IT, I'M CALLING IT.
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730. AWAY THAT WHICH HE LOVES.
THAT'S IT, I'M CALLING IT.
LISA, WHO DO YOU PICK?
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731. > LADIES AND GENTLEMEN,
MARGO PRICE.
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732. ♪ I PUT A HURTIN'
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733. BABY NOW I'M
BLIND ENOUGH TO SEE ♪
♪ BEEN DRINKING WHISKEY
Copy !req
734. BLIND ENOUGH TO SEE ♪
♪ BEEN DRINKING WHISKEY
LIKE IT'S WATER
Copy !req
735. BUT THAT DON'T TOUCH
THE PAIN YOU PUT ON ME ♪
♪ I WAS VEERING FOR THE
Copy !req
736. WHITE LINE OF THE SHOULDER ♪
♪ FADED LIGHTS ALL
CAST UPON THE WALL
Copy !req
737. BABY I KNOW WE'VE
BEEN GETTING OLDER ♪
♪ BUT YOU'RE NEVER
Copy !req
738. TOO OLD TO LEARN TO CRAWL ♪
♪ I PUT A HURTIN'
ON THE BOTTLE
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739. BABY NOW I'M
BLIND ENOUGH TO SEE ♪
♪ BEEN DRINKING WHISKEY
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740. BLIND ENOUGH TO SEE ♪
♪ BEEN DRINKING WHISKEY
LIKE IT'S WATER
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741. BUT THAT DON'T TOUCH
THE PAIN YOU PUT ON ME ♪
♪ I MET YOU WITH YOUR
Copy !req
742. THE PAIN YOU PUT ON ME ♪
♪ I MET YOU WITH YOUR
THUMB OUT IN THE ALLEY
Copy !req
743. I KNOW NO ONE EVER
COMES AROUND HERE NO MORE ♪
♪ BEEN LOOKING FOR A
Copy !req
744. COMES AROUND HERE NO MORE ♪
♪ BEEN LOOKING FOR A
PEAK INSIDE THE VALLEY
Copy !req
745. BEEN SEARCHING FOR A
KEY OUTSIDE YOUR DOOR ♪
♪ I PUT A HURTIN'
Copy !req
746. KEY OUTSIDE YOUR DOOR ♪
♪ I PUT A HURTIN'
ON THE BOTTLE
Copy !req
747. BABY NOW I'M
BLIND ENOUGH TO SEE ♪
♪ BEEN DRINKING WHISKEY
Copy !req
748. BLIND ENOUGH TO SEE ♪
♪ BEEN DRINKING WHISKEY
LIKE IT'S WATER
Copy !req
749. IT'S LIKE SINGING LOUD
WITH NO ONE LEFT TO HEAR ♪
♪ I'VE BEEN DRINKING FROM
Copy !req
750. WITH NO ONE LEFT TO HEAR ♪
♪ I'VE BEEN DRINKING FROM
THE WELL OF INSPIRATION
Copy !req
751. BUT IT'S ALL FALLING
ON THESE WASTED EARS ♪
♪ I PUT A HURTIN'
Copy !req
752. ON THESE WASTED EARS ♪
♪ I PUT A HURTIN'
ON THE BOTTLE
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753. BABY NOW I'M
BLIND ENOUGH TO SEE ♪
♪ BEEN DRINKING WHISKEY
Copy !req
754. BLIND ENOUGH TO SEE ♪
♪ BEEN DRINKING WHISKEY
LIKE IT'S WATER
Copy !req
755. BUT THAT DON'T TOUCH
THE PAIN YOU PUT ON ME ♪
♪ I PUT A HURTIN'
Copy !req
756. THE PAIN YOU PUT ON ME ♪
♪ I PUT A HURTIN'
ON THE BOTTLE
Copy !req
757. BABY NOW I'M BLIND
ENOUGH TO SEE ♪
♪ BEEN DRINKING WHISKEY
Copy !req
758. ENOUGH TO SEE ♪
♪ BEEN DRINKING WHISKEY
LIKE IT'S WATER
Copy !req
759. BUT THAT DON'T TOUCH
THE PAIN YOU PUT ON ME ♪
♪ BEEN DRINKING WHISKEY
Copy !req
760. THE PAIN YOU PUT ON ME ♪
♪ BEEN DRINKING WHISKEY
LIKE IT'S WATER
Copy !req
761. BUT THAT DON'T TOUCH
THE PAIN YOU PUT ON ME ♪
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762. > IT'S WEEKEND UPDATE WITH
COLIN JOST AND MICHAEL CHE.
Copy !req
763. COLIN JOST AND MICHAEL CHE.
GOOD EVENING, EVERYONE.
Copy !req
764. GOOD EVENING, EVERYONE.
WELCOME TO WEEKEND UPDATE.
Copy !req
765. GOOD EVENING, EVERYONE.
WELCOME TO WEEKEND UPDATE.
I'M MICHAEL CHE.
Copy !req
766. WELCOME TO WEEKEND UPDATE.
I'M MICHAEL CHE.
I'M COLIN JOST.
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767. I'M MICHAEL CHE.
I'M COLIN JOST.
AND HERE ARE TONIGHT'S TOP
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768. I'M COLIN JOST.
AND HERE ARE TONIGHT'S TOP
STORIES.
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769. AND HERE ARE TONIGHT'S TOP
STORIES.
EARLIER TODAY BERNIE SANDERS
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770. STORIES.
EARLIER TODAY BERNIE SANDERS
WON THE DEMOCRATIC CAUCUS IN
Copy !req
771. EARLIER TODAY BERNIE SANDERS
WON THE DEMOCRATIC CAUCUS IN
WYOMING, HIS FIFTH CONSECUTIVE
Copy !req
772. WON THE DEMOCRATIC CAUCUS IN
WYOMING, HIS FIFTH CONSECUTIVE
VICTORY IN THE PRIMARIES, AND
Copy !req
773. WYOMING, HIS FIFTH CONSECUTIVE
VICTORY IN THE PRIMARIES, AND
AFTER WINNING FIVE IN A ROW, HE
Copy !req
774. VICTORY IN THE PRIMARIES, AND
AFTER WINNING FIVE IN A ROW, HE
INSTINCTIVELY SHOUTED BINGO.
Copy !req
775. AFTER WINNING FIVE IN A ROW, HE
INSTINCTIVELY SHOUTED BINGO.
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776. INSTINCTIVELY SHOUTED BINGO.
ACCORDING TO THE LATEST
Copy !req
777. ACCORDING TO THE LATEST
GALLUP POLL, 70% OF WOMEN HAVE
Copy !req
778. ACCORDING TO THE LATEST
GALLUP POLL, 70% OF WOMEN HAVE
AN UNFAVORABLE VIEW OF
Copy !req
779. GALLUP POLL, 70% OF WOMEN HAVE
AN UNFAVORABLE VIEW OF
DONALD TRUMP.
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780. AN UNFAVORABLE VIEW OF
DONALD TRUMP.
WHILE THE OTHER 30% HAVE NO VIEW
Copy !req
781. DONALD TRUMP.
WHILE THE OTHER 30% HAVE NO VIEW
AT ALL BECAUSE THEY WERE PEPPER
Copy !req
782. WHILE THE OTHER 30% HAVE NO VIEW
AT ALL BECAUSE THEY WERE PEPPER
SPRAYED AT ONE OF HIS RALLIES.
Copy !req
783. AT ALL BECAUSE THEY WERE PEPPER
SPRAYED AT ONE OF HIS RALLIES.
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784. SPRAYED AT ONE OF HIS RALLIES.
WHILE CAMPAIGNING IN NEW
Copy !req
785. WHILE CAMPAIGNING IN NEW
YORK, HILLARY CLINTON RODE THE
Copy !req
786. WHILE CAMPAIGNING IN NEW
YORK, HILLARY CLINTON RODE THE
SUBWAY, BUT IT TOOK HER FIVE
Copy !req
787. YORK, HILLARY CLINTON RODE THE
SUBWAY, BUT IT TOOK HER FIVE
TIMES TO SWIPE HER METRO CARD.
Copy !req
788. SUBWAY, BUT IT TOOK HER FIVE
TIMES TO SWIPE HER METRO CARD.
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789. TIMES TO SWIPE HER METRO CARD.
BEFORE REALIZING SHE WAS
Copy !req
790. BEFORE REALIZING SHE WAS
ACTUALLY SWIPING HER GOLDMAN
Copy !req
791. BEFORE REALIZING SHE WAS
ACTUALLY SWIPING HER GOLDMAN
SACHS AMERICAN EXPRESS CARD.
Copy !req
792. ACTUALLY SWIPING HER GOLDMAN
SACHS AMERICAN EXPRESS CARD.
Copy !req
793. SACHS AMERICAN EXPRESS CARD.
HILLARY ONLY RODE THE SUBWAY ONE
Copy !req
794. HILLARY ONLY RODE THE SUBWAY ONE
STOP, THOUGH SHE DID MAKE $4
Copy !req
795. HILLARY ONLY RODE THE SUBWAY ONE
STOP, THOUGH SHE DID MAKE $4
WITH HER BREAKDANCE CREW.
Copy !req
796. STOP, THOUGH SHE DID MAKE $4
WITH HER BREAKDANCE CREW.
BERNIE SANDERS WAS CRITICIZED
Copy !req
797. WITH HER BREAKDANCE CREW.
BERNIE SANDERS WAS CRITICIZED
AFTER HE INACCURATELY SAID THAT
Copy !req
798. BERNIE SANDERS WAS CRITICIZED
AFTER HE INACCURATELY SAID THAT
PEOPLE RIDING THE NEW YORK CITY
Copy !req
799. AFTER HE INACCURATELY SAID THAT
PEOPLE RIDING THE NEW YORK CITY
SUBWAY STILL USE TOKENS.
Copy !req
800. PEOPLE RIDING THE NEW YORK CITY
SUBWAY STILL USE TOKENS.
BUT IN FAIRNESS, BERNIE ACTUALLY
Copy !req
801. SUBWAY STILL USE TOKENS.
BUT IN FAIRNESS, BERNIE ACTUALLY
DOES STILL USE TOKENS IN HIS
Copy !req
802. BUT IN FAIRNESS, BERNIE ACTUALLY
DOES STILL USE TOKENS IN HIS
CAMPAIGN.
Copy !req
803. DOES STILL USE TOKENS IN HIS
CAMPAIGN.
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804. CAMPAIGN.
OH, YEAH, NONE OF YOU WERE
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805. OH, YEAH, NONE OF YOU WERE
THERE.
Copy !req
806. OH, YEAH, NONE OF YOU WERE
THERE.
WHILE CAMPAIGNING IN NEW YORK
Copy !req
807. THERE.
WHILE CAMPAIGNING IN NEW YORK
HILLARY CLINTON ROAD THE SUBWAY
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808. WHILE CAMPAIGNING IN NEW YORK
HILLARY CLINTON ROAD THE SUBWAY
ONE STOP.
Copy !req
809. HILLARY CLINTON ROAD THE SUBWAY
ONE STOP.
NOT TO BE OUTDONE TED CRUZ
Copy !req
810. ONE STOP.
NOT TO BE OUTDONE TED CRUZ
DRAGGED A SLICE OF PIZZA DOWN
Copy !req
811. NOT TO BE OUTDONE TED CRUZ
DRAGGED A SLICE OF PIZZA DOWN
THE STREET WITH HIS TEETH.
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812. DRAGGED A SLICE OF PIZZA DOWN
THE STREET WITH HIS TEETH.
Copy !req
813. THE STREET WITH HIS TEETH.
AND TED CRUZ, I'D JUST LIKE
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814. AND TED CRUZ, I'D JUST LIKE
TO SAY ON BEHALF OF ALL NEW
Copy !req
815. AND TED CRUZ, I'D JUST LIKE
TO SAY ON BEHALF OF ALL NEW
YORKERS, PLEASE DON'T COME HERE.
Copy !req
816. TO SAY ON BEHALF OF ALL NEW
YORKERS, PLEASE DON'T COME HERE.
Copy !req
817. YORKERS, PLEASE DON'T COME HERE.
I MEAN, YOU OBVIOUSLY DON'T WANT
Copy !req
818. I MEAN, YOU OBVIOUSLY DON'T WANT
TO BE HERE AND NO ONE HERE WANTS
Copy !req
819. I MEAN, YOU OBVIOUSLY DON'T WANT
TO BE HERE AND NO ONE HERE WANTS
YOU HERE EITHER.
Copy !req
820. TO BE HERE AND NO ONE HERE WANTS
YOU HERE EITHER.
Copy !req
821. YOU HERE EITHER.
I NEVER THOUGHT I'D HAVE TO SAY
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822. I NEVER THOUGHT I'D HAVE TO SAY
THIS, BUT YOU DON'T DESERVE TO
Copy !req
823. I NEVER THOUGHT I'D HAVE TO SAY
THIS, BUT YOU DON'T DESERVE TO
EAT AT OUR BUBBA GUMP SHRIMP
Copy !req
824. THIS, BUT YOU DON'T DESERVE TO
EAT AT OUR BUBBA GUMP SHRIMP
COMPANY.
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825. EAT AT OUR BUBBA GUMP SHRIMP
COMPANY.
Copy !req
826. COMPANY.
EVEN TIMES SQUARE ELMO IS LIKE,
Copy !req
827. EVEN TIMES SQUARE ELMO IS LIKE,
I DON'T WANT TO TAKE A PICTURE
Copy !req
828. EVEN TIMES SQUARE ELMO IS LIKE,
I DON'T WANT TO TAKE A PICTURE
WITH THIS GUY.
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829. I DON'T WANT TO TAKE A PICTURE
WITH THIS GUY.
Copy !req
830. WITH THIS GUY.
AND THEN, AFTER YOUR WEIRD
Copy !req
831. AND THEN, AFTER YOUR WEIRD
VEILED ANTI-SEMITIC COMMENTS
Copy !req
832. AND THEN, AFTER YOUR WEIRD
VEILED ANTI-SEMITIC COMMENTS
ABOUT NEW YORK VALUES, YOU WENT
Copy !req
833. VEILED ANTI-SEMITIC COMMENTS
ABOUT NEW YORK VALUES, YOU WENT
AND MADE MATZAH AT A JEWISH
Copy !req
834. ABOUT NEW YORK VALUES, YOU WENT
AND MADE MATZAH AT A JEWISH
BAKERY?
Copy !req
835. AND MADE MATZAH AT A JEWISH
BAKERY?
WHAT ARE YOU DOING NEXT?
Copy !req
836. BAKERY?
WHAT ARE YOU DOING NEXT?
ROLLING OUT THE FIRST PITCH AT A
Copy !req
837. WHAT ARE YOU DOING NEXT?
ROLLING OUT THE FIRST PITCH AT A
LESBIAN KICKBALL GAME?
Copy !req
838. ROLLING OUT THE FIRST PITCH AT A
LESBIAN KICKBALL GAME?
Copy !req
839. LESBIAN KICKBALL GAME?
WE DON'T HAVE VALUES?
Copy !req
840. WE DON'T HAVE VALUES?
NEW YORK, THAT'S WHY WE ALL CAME
Copy !req
841. WE DON'T HAVE VALUES?
NEW YORK, THAT'S WHY WE ALL CAME
TO NEW YORK TO ESCAPE WEIRD
Copy !req
842. NEW YORK, THAT'S WHY WE ALL CAME
TO NEW YORK TO ESCAPE WEIRD
PEOPLE LIKE YOU.
Copy !req
843. TO NEW YORK TO ESCAPE WEIRD
PEOPLE LIKE YOU.
SO PLEASE DON'T CRITICIZE NEW
Copy !req
844. PEOPLE LIKE YOU.
SO PLEASE DON'T CRITICIZE NEW
YORK UNTIL YOU'VE ACTUALLY LIVED
Copy !req
845. SO PLEASE DON'T CRITICIZE NEW
YORK UNTIL YOU'VE ACTUALLY LIVED
HERE.
Copy !req
846. YORK UNTIL YOU'VE ACTUALLY LIVED
HERE.
UNTIL YOU'VE WALKED INTO YOUR
Copy !req
847. HERE.
UNTIL YOU'VE WALKED INTO YOUR
APARTMENT AND FOUND A RAT
Copy !req
848. UNTIL YOU'VE WALKED INTO YOUR
APARTMENT AND FOUND A RAT
MASTURBATING ON YOUR COUCH.
Copy !req
849. APARTMENT AND FOUND A RAT
MASTURBATING ON YOUR COUCH.
Copy !req
850. MASTURBATING ON YOUR COUCH.
OKAY?
Copy !req
851. OKAY?
THEN YOU CAN CRITICIZE NEW YORK.
Copy !req
852. OKAY?
THEN YOU CAN CRITICIZE NEW YORK.
BUT NOT THAT MUCH, BECAUSE THAT
Copy !req
853. THEN YOU CAN CRITICIZE NEW YORK.
BUT NOT THAT MUCH, BECAUSE THAT
RAT DOES PAY HALF THE RENT.
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854. BUT NOT THAT MUCH, BECAUSE THAT
RAT DOES PAY HALF THE RENT.
Copy !req
855. RAT DOES PAY HALF THE RENT.
ALSO, YOU'RE NOT GOING TO
Copy !req
856. ALSO, YOU'RE NOT GOING TO
APPEAL TO NEW YORKERS BY
Copy !req
857. ALSO, YOU'RE NOT GOING TO
APPEAL TO NEW YORKERS BY
CHOOSING TO RIDE THE SUBWAY.
Copy !req
858. APPEAL TO NEW YORKERS BY
CHOOSING TO RIDE THE SUBWAY.
NEW YORKERS DON'T RIDE THE
Copy !req
859. CHOOSING TO RIDE THE SUBWAY.
NEW YORKERS DON'T RIDE THE
SUBWAY BECAUSE WE LIKE TO.
Copy !req
860. NEW YORKERS DON'T RIDE THE
SUBWAY BECAUSE WE LIKE TO.
WE RIDE THE SUBWAY BECAUSE WE
Copy !req
861. SUBWAY BECAUSE WE LIKE TO.
WE RIDE THE SUBWAY BECAUSE WE
HAVE TO.
Copy !req
862. WE RIDE THE SUBWAY BECAUSE WE
HAVE TO.
IT'S THE LAST PLACE ANY OF US
Copy !req
863. HAVE TO.
IT'S THE LAST PLACE ANY OF US
REALLY WANT TO BE, UNLESS YOU
Copy !req
864. IT'S THE LAST PLACE ANY OF US
REALLY WANT TO BE, UNLESS YOU
NEED TO BUY BATTERIES, CANDY AND
Copy !req
865. REALLY WANT TO BE, UNLESS YOU
NEED TO BUY BATTERIES, CANDY AND
PORNO AT 9:00 A.M.
Copy !req
866. NEED TO BUY BATTERIES, CANDY AND
PORNO AT 9:00 A.M.
OR YOU REALLY ENJOYED HEARING A
Copy !req
867. PORNO AT 9:00 A.M.
OR YOU REALLY ENJOYED HEARING A
PUERTO RICAN TEENAGER CALL A
Copy !req
868. OR YOU REALLY ENJOYED HEARING A
PUERTO RICAN TEENAGER CALL A
WHITE LADY THE N WORD.
Copy !req
869. PUERTO RICAN TEENAGER CALL A
WHITE LADY THE N WORD.
Copy !req
870. WHITE LADY THE N WORD.
OR MAYBE YOU JUST WANT TO STAND
Copy !req
871. OR MAYBE YOU JUST WANT TO STAND
IN A STICKY PUDDLE AND GUESS, IS
Copy !req
872. OR MAYBE YOU JUST WANT TO STAND
IN A STICKY PUDDLE AND GUESS, IS
THIS URINE OR SNAPPLE.
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873. IN A STICKY PUDDLE AND GUESS, IS
THIS URINE OR SNAPPLE.
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874. THIS URINE OR SNAPPLE.
OR — OR PERHAPS YOU'VE ALWAYS
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875. OR — OR PERHAPS YOU'VE ALWAYS
WANTED TO SEE THE WORLDS LARGEST
Copy !req
876. OR — OR PERHAPS YOU'VE ALWAYS
WANTED TO SEE THE WORLDS LARGEST
PENIS ON THE WORLDS POOREST MAN.
Copy !req
877. WANTED TO SEE THE WORLDS LARGEST
PENIS ON THE WORLDS POOREST MAN.
Copy !req
878. PENIS ON THE WORLDS POOREST MAN.
OTHER THAN THAT, THERE IS NO
Copy !req
879. OTHER THAN THAT, THERE IS NO
REASON TO ENJOY RIDING THE
Copy !req
880. OTHER THAN THAT, THERE IS NO
REASON TO ENJOY RIDING THE
SUBWAY.
Copy !req
881. REASON TO ENJOY RIDING THE
SUBWAY.
Copy !req
882. SUBWAY.
IN FACT, THE LAST LAST PERSON I
Copy !req
883. IN FACT, THE LAST LAST PERSON I
WOULD EVER VOTE FOR IS SOMEBODY
Copy !req
884. IN FACT, THE LAST LAST PERSON I
WOULD EVER VOTE FOR IS SOMEBODY
I MET ON THE SUBWAY.
Copy !req
885. WOULD EVER VOTE FOR IS SOMEBODY
I MET ON THE SUBWAY.
Copy !req
886. I MET ON THE SUBWAY.
THAT'S A BIG PENIS.
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887. THAT'S A BIG PENIS.
> THE MUCH TALKED ABOUT
Copy !req
888. THAT'S A BIG PENIS.
> THE MUCH TALKED ABOUT
MINISERIES OF THE PEOPLE VERSUS
Copy !req
889. > THE MUCH TALKED ABOUT
MINISERIES OF THE PEOPLE VERSUS
O.J. SIMPSON ENDED THIS WEEK.
Copy !req
890. MINISERIES OF THE PEOPLE VERSUS
O.J. SIMPSON ENDED THIS WEEK.
THESE LIGHTS ARE SO HOT, I'M
Copy !req
891. O.J. SIMPSON ENDED THIS WEEK.
THESE LIGHTS ARE SO HOT, I'M
SWEATING LIKE A MOUSE IN A CAT
Copy !req
892. THESE LIGHTS ARE SO HOT, I'M
SWEATING LIKE A MOUSE IN A CAT
SHOW.
Copy !req
893. SWEATING LIKE A MOUSE IN A CAT
SHOW.
YOU LOOK HUNKY TONIGHT.
Copy !req
894. SHOW.
YOU LOOK HUNKY TONIGHT.
YOU LOOK LIKE THE GUY ON THE
Copy !req
895. YOU LOOK HUNKY TONIGHT.
YOU LOOK LIKE THE GUY ON THE
SHOW WITH THE GIRL WITH THE RED
Copy !req
896. YOU LOOK LIKE THE GUY ON THE
SHOW WITH THE GIRL WITH THE RED
DOT?
Copy !req
897. SHOW WITH THE GIRL WITH THE RED
DOT?
DINI.
Copy !req
898. DOT?
DINI.
YOU WANT TO GIVE US A RECAP ON
Copy !req
899. DINI.
YOU WANT TO GIVE US A RECAP ON
THE O.J. MINISERIES.
Copy !req
900. YOU WANT TO GIVE US A RECAP ON
THE O.J. MINISERIES.
I DIDN'T GET THROUGH ALL OF
Copy !req
901. THE O.J. MINISERIES.
I DIDN'T GET THROUGH ALL OF
IT, BECAUSE I HAD TO FINISH MY
Copy !req
902. I DIDN'T GET THROUGH ALL OF
IT, BECAUSE I HAD TO FINISH MY
SOAPS FIRST.
Copy !req
903. IT, BECAUSE I HAD TO FINISH MY
SOAPS FIRST.
BOY ARE THEY GETTING GOOD.
Copy !req
904. SOAPS FIRST.
BOY ARE THEY GETTING GOOD.
ARE YOU UP TO DATE?
Copy !req
905. BOY ARE THEY GETTING GOOD.
ARE YOU UP TO DATE?
THE WHOLE FAMILY TURNED ON
Copy !req
906. ARE YOU UP TO DATE?
THE WHOLE FAMILY TURNED ON
MUSTACHE AND HE WENT TO JAIL,
Copy !req
907. THE WHOLE FAMILY TURNED ON
MUSTACHE AND HE WENT TO JAIL,
AND NOW NOW REDHEAD IS LOCKED IN
Copy !req
908. MUSTACHE AND HE WENT TO JAIL,
AND NOW NOW REDHEAD IS LOCKED IN
THE FALLOUT SHELTER WITH
Copy !req
909. AND NOW NOW REDHEAD IS LOCKED IN
THE FALLOUT SHELTER WITH
MUSTACHE'S BROTHER, NO MUSTACHE.
Copy !req
910. THE FALLOUT SHELTER WITH
MUSTACHE'S BROTHER, NO MUSTACHE.
JUST AS THEY WERE GETTING COZY,
Copy !req
911. MUSTACHE'S BROTHER, NO MUSTACHE.
JUST AS THEY WERE GETTING COZY,
IT TURNED INTO THE NANCY REAGAN
Copy !req
912. JUST AS THEY WERE GETTING COZY,
IT TURNED INTO THE NANCY REAGAN
FUNERAL.
Copy !req
913. IT TURNED INTO THE NANCY REAGAN
FUNERAL.
THIS IS A SOAP OPERA?
Copy !req
914. FUNERAL.
THIS IS A SOAP OPERA?
YEAH.
Copy !req
915. THIS IS A SOAP OPERA?
YEAH.
THEN DID YOU WATCH O.J.?
Copy !req
916. YEAH.
THEN DID YOU WATCH O.J.?
I WAS ABOUT TO, BUT THEN I
Copy !req
917. THEN DID YOU WATCH O.J.?
I WAS ABOUT TO, BUT THEN I
SPILLED TUNA CASSEROLE ON MY
Copy !req
918. I WAS ABOUT TO, BUT THEN I
SPILLED TUNA CASSEROLE ON MY
CLERKER.
Copy !req
919. SPILLED TUNA CASSEROLE ON MY
CLERKER.
IT KEPT GOING TO THE PEOPLE
Copy !req
920. CLERKER.
IT KEPT GOING TO THE PEOPLE
VERSUS B.J. SIMPSON AND I
Copy !req
921. IT KEPT GOING TO THE PEOPLE
VERSUS B.J. SIMPSON AND I
COULDN'T GET OUT OF IT.
Copy !req
922. VERSUS B.J. SIMPSON AND I
COULDN'T GET OUT OF IT.
WHAT HAPPENED THEN?
Copy !req
923. COULDN'T GET OUT OF IT.
WHAT HAPPENED THEN?
WELL, FIRST OF ALL, TWO TAN
Copy !req
924. WHAT HAPPENED THEN?
WELL, FIRST OF ALL, TWO TAN
GUYS AND A DEAD GUY STARTING
Copy !req
925. WELL, FIRST OF ALL, TWO TAN
GUYS AND A DEAD GUY STARTING
RAILING ON —
Copy !req
926. GUYS AND A DEAD GUY STARTING
RAILING ON —
SO YOU WATCHED PORN?
Copy !req
927. RAILING ON —
SO YOU WATCHED PORN?
WELL, IT SOUNDED LIKE SOMEONE
Copy !req
928. SO YOU WATCHED PORN?
WELL, IT SOUNDED LIKE SOMEONE
WAS PLUNGING A TOILET AND —
Copy !req
929. WELL, IT SOUNDED LIKE SOMEONE
WAS PLUNGING A TOILET AND —
OKAY, OKAY.
Copy !req
930. WAS PLUNGING A TOILET AND —
OKAY, OKAY.
WHAT ARE YOU EATING BY THE WAY?
Copy !req
931. OKAY, OKAY.
WHAT ARE YOU EATING BY THE WAY?
BRUSSEL SPROUTS AND IMITATION
Copy !req
932. WHAT ARE YOU EATING BY THE WAY?
BRUSSEL SPROUTS AND IMITATION
CRAB.
Copy !req
933. BRUSSEL SPROUTS AND IMITATION
CRAB.
BRUSSEL SPROUTS ARE A RIOT,
Copy !req
934. CRAB.
BRUSSEL SPROUTS ARE A RIOT,
THEY SMELL LIKE A FART, BUT THEY
Copy !req
935. BRUSSEL SPROUTS ARE A RIOT,
THEY SMELL LIKE A FART, BUT THEY
TASTE LIKE A BURP.
Copy !req
936. THEY SMELL LIKE A FART, BUT THEY
TASTE LIKE A BURP.
YOU WANT ONE?
Copy !req
937. TASTE LIKE A BURP.
YOU WANT ONE?
YOU WANT ME TO SAVE ONE OR TWO
Copy !req
938. YOU WANT ONE?
YOU WANT ME TO SAVE ONE OR TWO
OF THESE STINK BOMBS SO YOU CAN
Copy !req
939. YOU WANT ME TO SAVE ONE OR TWO
OF THESE STINK BOMBS SO YOU CAN
POP THEM DURING A COMMERCIAL?
Copy !req
940. OF THESE STINK BOMBS SO YOU CAN
POP THEM DURING A COMMERCIAL?
REALLY COOL.
Copy !req
941. POP THEM DURING A COMMERCIAL?
REALLY COOL.
THANK YOU.
Copy !req
942. REALLY COOL.
THANK YOU.
SAVE IT, IT WILL BE GOOD
Copy !req
943. THANK YOU.
SAVE IT, IT WILL BE GOOD
LATER.
Copy !req
944. SAVE IT, IT WILL BE GOOD
LATER.
THANK YOU.
Copy !req
945. LATER.
THANK YOU.
DID YOU EVER END UP WATCHING
Copy !req
946. THANK YOU.
DID YOU EVER END UP WATCHING
O.J., BY THE WAY?
Copy !req
947. DID YOU EVER END UP WATCHING
O.J., BY THE WAY?
I WAS DOING A THOMAS KINCAID
Copy !req
948. O.J., BY THE WAY?
I WAS DOING A THOMAS KINCAID
PUZZLE OF A LIGHTHOUSE AT THE
Copy !req
949. I WAS DOING A THOMAS KINCAID
PUZZLE OF A LIGHTHOUSE AT THE
SAME TIME, I GOT THE GIST.
Copy !req
950. PUZZLE OF A LIGHTHOUSE AT THE
SAME TIME, I GOT THE GIST.
YOU WANT TO SHARE WITH US,
Copy !req
951. SAME TIME, I GOT THE GIST.
YOU WANT TO SHARE WITH US,
THE JIFT?
Copy !req
952. YOU WANT TO SHARE WITH US,
THE JIFT?
YEAH, SURE.
Copy !req
953. THE JIFT?
YEAH, SURE.
OKAY.
Copy !req
954. YEAH, SURE.
OKAY.
I WATCHED ONE WHERE SHOW ME THE
Copy !req
955. OKAY.
I WATCHED ONE WHERE SHOW ME THE
MONEY TRIED ON THE GLOVE THAT
Copy !req
956. I WATCHED ONE WHERE SHOW ME THE
MONEY TRIED ON THE GLOVE THAT
SHRUNK AND CURLEY HEAD GOT MAD
Copy !req
957. MONEY TRIED ON THE GLOVE THAT
SHRUNK AND CURLEY HEAD GOT MAD
AT BLACK MR. CLEAN.
Copy !req
958. SHRUNK AND CURLEY HEAD GOT MAD
AT BLACK MR. CLEAN.
AND THEN —
Copy !req
959. AT BLACK MR. CLEAN.
AND THEN —
Copy !req
960. AND THEN —
AND THEN SKUNK HAIR FROM FRIENDS
Copy !req
961. AND THEN SKUNK HAIR FROM FRIENDS
KEPT BRINGING UP THE JUICE.
Copy !req
962. AND THEN SKUNK HAIR FROM FRIENDS
KEPT BRINGING UP THE JUICE.
Copy !req
963. KEPT BRINGING UP THE JUICE.
I THINK THAT WAS
Copy !req
964. I THINK THAT WAS
ROBERT KARDASHIAN.
Copy !req
965. I THINK THAT WAS
ROBERT KARDASHIAN.
I THINK HE WAS SAYING JUICE.
Copy !req
966. ROBERT KARDASHIAN.
I THINK HE WAS SAYING JUICE.
OH, OKAY.
Copy !req
967. I THINK HE WAS SAYING JUICE.
OH, OKAY.
WELL —
Copy !req
968. OH, OKAY.
WELL —
ALL I KNOW, COLIN, IS THAT I
Copy !req
969. WELL —
ALL I KNOW, COLIN, IS THAT I
FIGURED OUT WHO DID IT IN THE
Copy !req
970. ALL I KNOW, COLIN, IS THAT I
FIGURED OUT WHO DID IT IN THE
FIRST FIVE MINUTES.
Copy !req
971. FIGURED OUT WHO DID IT IN THE
FIRST FIVE MINUTES.
Copy !req
972. FIRST FIVE MINUTES.
I MEAN, YOU'D HAVE TO BE A DUMB
Copy !req
973. I MEAN, YOU'D HAVE TO BE A DUMB
ASS NOT TO GET THAT ONE.
Copy !req
974. I MEAN, YOU'D HAVE TO BE A DUMB
ASS NOT TO GET THAT ONE.
IT WAS TOO OBVIOUS.
Copy !req
975. ASS NOT TO GET THAT ONE.
IT WAS TOO OBVIOUS.
I'M STARTING TO WATCH THAT
Copy !req
976. IT WAS TOO OBVIOUS.
I'M STARTING TO WATCH THAT
ONE WITH DARK HAIR AND WORRY
Copy !req
977. I'M STARTING TO WATCH THAT
ONE WITH DARK HAIR AND WORRY
WART AND CRAZY HAIR, AND THE
Copy !req
978. ONE WITH DARK HAIR AND WORRY
WART AND CRAZY HAIR, AND THE
WOMAN WHO LOOKS AT HIM LIKE SHE
Copy !req
979. WART AND CRAZY HAIR, AND THE
WOMAN WHO LOOKS AT HIM LIKE SHE
WANTS TO HIT HIM WITH HER CAR.
Copy !req
980. WOMAN WHO LOOKS AT HIM LIKE SHE
WANTS TO HIT HIM WITH HER CAR.
IS IT SEINFELD?
Copy !req
981. WANTS TO HIT HIM WITH HER CAR.
IS IT SEINFELD?
NO, NO, THE ELECTION.
Copy !req
982. IS IT SEINFELD?
NO, NO, THE ELECTION.
OH THE ELECTION.
Copy !req
983. NO, NO, THE ELECTION.
OH THE ELECTION.
YES.
Copy !req
984. OH THE ELECTION.
YES.
> THE IMAGE WAS SEXUALLY
Copy !req
985. YES.
> THE IMAGE WAS SEXUALLY
SUGGESTIVE, THE NEW DESIGN OF A
Copy !req
986. > THE IMAGE WAS SEXUALLY
SUGGESTIVE, THE NEW DESIGN OF A
MAN HUSKING CORN ISN'T MUCH
Copy !req
987. SUGGESTIVE, THE NEW DESIGN OF A
MAN HUSKING CORN ISN'T MUCH
BETTER.
Copy !req
988. MAN HUSKING CORN ISN'T MUCH
BETTER.
> POLICE IN NEW YORK ARE
Copy !req
989. BETTER.
> POLICE IN NEW YORK ARE
SEARCHING FOR A TEENAGED GIRL
Copy !req
990. > POLICE IN NEW YORK ARE
SEARCHING FOR A TEENAGED GIRL
WHO STABBED A 13-YEAR-OLD BOY ON
Copy !req
991. SEARCHING FOR A TEENAGED GIRL
WHO STABBED A 13-YEAR-OLD BOY ON
THE SUBWAY AFTER A FRIEND OF HIS
Copy !req
992. WHO STABBED A 13-YEAR-OLD BOY ON
THE SUBWAY AFTER A FRIEND OF HIS
CALLED HER UGLY.
Copy !req
993. THE SUBWAY AFTER A FRIEND OF HIS
CALLED HER UGLY.
LET THIS BE A LESSEN, KIDS, UGLY
Copy !req
994. CALLED HER UGLY.
LET THIS BE A LESSEN, KIDS, UGLY
GIRLS ARE CRAZY.
Copy !req
995. LET THIS BE A LESSEN, KIDS, UGLY
GIRLS ARE CRAZY.
> CONGRATULATIONS TO
Copy !req
996. GIRLS ARE CRAZY.
> CONGRATULATIONS TO
VILLANOVA, THEY WON THE NCAA
Copy !req
997. > CONGRATULATIONS TO
VILLANOVA, THEY WON THE NCAA
CHAMPIONSHIP GAME 77-74.
Copy !req
998. VILLANOVA, THEY WON THE NCAA
CHAMPIONSHIP GAME 77-74.
I WONDER IF CHARLES BARKLEY HAD
Copy !req
999. CHAMPIONSHIP GAME 77-74.
I WONDER IF CHARLES BARKLEY HAD
ANY MONEY ON THE GAME?
Copy !req
1000. I WONDER IF CHARLES BARKLEY HAD
ANY MONEY ON THE GAME?
THAT IS CLEARLY THE
Copy !req
1001. ANY MONEY ON THE GAME?
THAT IS CLEARLY THE
CELEBRATION OF A MAN WHO JUST
Copy !req
1002. THAT IS CLEARLY THE
CELEBRATION OF A MAN WHO JUST
FOUND HE WON.
Copy !req
1003. CELEBRATION OF A MAN WHO JUST
FOUND HE WON.
> WARNER BROTHERS IS WORKING
Copy !req
1004. FOUND HE WON.
> WARNER BROTHERS IS WORKING
ON A MOVIE ABOUT SPEEDY
Copy !req
1005. > WARNER BROTHERS IS WORKING
ON A MOVIE ABOUT SPEEDY
GONZALEZ.
Copy !req
1006. ON A MOVIE ABOUT SPEEDY
GONZALEZ.
IT'S CALLED SPEEDY GONZALEZ
Copy !req
1007. GONZALEZ.
IT'S CALLED SPEEDY GONZALEZ
VERSUS BATMAN, VERSUS SUPERMAN.
Copy !req
1008. IT'S CALLED SPEEDY GONZALEZ
VERSUS BATMAN, VERSUS SUPERMAN.
SO IT'S GOING TO BE BAD.
Copy !req
1009. VERSUS BATMAN, VERSUS SUPERMAN.
SO IT'S GOING TO BE BAD.
> BILL CLINTON WAS CRITICIZED
Copy !req
1010. SO IT'S GOING TO BE BAD.
> BILL CLINTON WAS CRITICIZED
THIS WEEK FOR SNAPPING AT BLACK
Copy !req
1011. > BILL CLINTON WAS CRITICIZED
THIS WEEK FOR SNAPPING AT BLACK
LIVES MATTER PROTESTERS I
Copy !req
1012. THIS WEEK FOR SNAPPING AT BLACK
LIVES MATTER PROTESTERS I
UNDERSTAND WHERE BILL'S COMING
Copy !req
1013. LIVES MATTER PROTESTERS I
UNDERSTAND WHERE BILL'S COMING
FROM, HE'S DESPENDING HIS WIFE.
Copy !req
1014. UNDERSTAND WHERE BILL'S COMING
FROM, HE'S DESPENDING HIS WIFE.
IT DOESN'T MATTER HOW WRONG SHE
Copy !req
1015. FROM, HE'S DESPENDING HIS WIFE.
IT DOESN'T MATTER HOW WRONG SHE
IS.
Copy !req
1016. IT DOESN'T MATTER HOW WRONG SHE
IS.
HE STILL HAS TO TAKE HIMSELF
Copy !req
1017. IS.
HE STILL HAS TO TAKE HIMSELF
HOME.
Copy !req
1018. HE STILL HAS TO TAKE HIMSELF
HOME.
IF ANYBODY SHOULD SUPPORT HIS
Copy !req
1019. HOME.
IF ANYBODY SHOULD SUPPORT HIS
WIFE, IT'S BILL CLINTON.
Copy !req
1020. IF ANYBODY SHOULD SUPPORT HIS
WIFE, IT'S BILL CLINTON.
SHE SHOULD BE ABLE TO FIST FIGHT
Copy !req
1021. WIFE, IT'S BILL CLINTON.
SHE SHOULD BE ABLE TO FIST FIGHT
A BLACK BABY ON BET AND BILL
Copy !req
1022. SHE SHOULD BE ABLE TO FIST FIGHT
A BLACK BABY ON BET AND BILL
BETTER SAY, I SUPPORT THAT
Copy !req
1023. A BLACK BABY ON BET AND BILL
BETTER SAY, I SUPPORT THAT
WOMAN.
Copy !req
1024. BETTER SAY, I SUPPORT THAT
WOMAN.
> THE OWNERS OF AN APARTMENT
Copy !req
1025. WOMAN.
> THE OWNERS OF AN APARTMENT
COMPLEX IN MICHIGAN, HAVE FORCED
Copy !req
1026. > THE OWNERS OF AN APARTMENT
COMPLEX IN MICHIGAN, HAVE FORCED
ALL TENANTS TO GIVE DNA SAMPLES
Copy !req
1027. COMPLEX IN MICHIGAN, HAVE FORCED
ALL TENANTS TO GIVE DNA SAMPLES
OF THEIR DOGS SO THEY CAN
Copy !req
1028. ALL TENANTS TO GIVE DNA SAMPLES
OF THEIR DOGS SO THEY CAN
DETERMINE WHO IS NOT PICKING UP
Copy !req
1029. OF THEIR DOGS SO THEY CAN
DETERMINE WHO IS NOT PICKING UP
AFTER THEIR PETS.
Copy !req
1030. DETERMINE WHO IS NOT PICKING UP
AFTER THEIR PETS.
AFTER ANALYZING THE DNA, IT
Copy !req
1031. AFTER THEIR PETS.
AFTER ANALYZING THE DNA, IT
TURNED OUT THE CULPRIT WAS O.J.
Copy !req
1032. AFTER ANALYZING THE DNA, IT
TURNED OUT THE CULPRIT WAS O.J.
SIMPSON.
Copy !req
1033. TURNED OUT THE CULPRIT WAS O.J.
SIMPSON.
I DON'T BELIEVE HE DID THAT
Copy !req
1034. SIMPSON.
I DON'T BELIEVE HE DID THAT
EITHER.
Copy !req
1035. I DON'T BELIEVE HE DID THAT
EITHER.
> A BRITISH WOMAN WITH ONLY
Copy !req
1036. EITHER.
> A BRITISH WOMAN WITH ONLY
ONE ARM HAS BECOME A COMPETITIVE
Copy !req
1037. > A BRITISH WOMAN WITH ONLY
ONE ARM HAS BECOME A COMPETITIVE
ROCK CLIMBER, SHE'S MOST KNOWN
Copy !req
1038. ONE ARM HAS BECOME A COMPETITIVE
ROCK CLIMBER, SHE'S MOST KNOWN
FOR HER MOST FAMOUS CATCH
Copy !req
1039. ROCK CLIMBER, SHE'S MOST KNOWN
FOR HER MOST FAMOUS CATCH
PHRASE, HELP, I'M FALLING.
Copy !req
1040. FOR HER MOST FAMOUS CATCH
PHRASE, HELP, I'M FALLING.
> THIS WEEK, ROB KARDASHIAN
Copy !req
1041. PHRASE, HELP, I'M FALLING.
> THIS WEEK, ROB KARDASHIAN
GOT ENGAGED TO MODEL BLAC CHYNA.
Copy !req
1042. > THIS WEEK, ROB KARDASHIAN
GOT ENGAGED TO MODEL BLAC CHYNA.
INCIDENTALLY, BLAC CHYNA IS ALSO
Copy !req
1043. GOT ENGAGED TO MODEL BLAC CHYNA.
INCIDENTALLY, BLAC CHYNA IS ALSO
WHAT MY GRANDFATHER CALLS THE
Copy !req
1044. INCIDENTALLY, BLAC CHYNA IS ALSO
WHAT MY GRANDFATHER CALLS THE
MOVIE "RUSH HOUR."
Copy !req
1045. WHAT MY GRANDFATHER CALLS THE
MOVIE "RUSH HOUR."
Copy !req
1046. MOVIE "RUSH HOUR."
MAJOR LEAGUE BASEBALL
Copy !req
1047. MAJOR LEAGUE BASEBALL
RETURNED THIS WEEK.
Copy !req
1048. MAJOR LEAGUE BASEBALL
RETURNED THIS WEEK.
THE GOLDEN STATE WARRIORS ARE
Copy !req
1049. RETURNED THIS WEEK.
THE GOLDEN STATE WARRIORS ARE
CHASING HISTORY.
Copy !req
1050. THE GOLDEN STATE WARRIORS ARE
CHASING HISTORY.
AND THE FINAL ROUND OF THE
Copy !req
1051. CHASING HISTORY.
AND THE FINAL ROUND OF THE
MASTER'S TOURNAMENT IS SET TO
Copy !req
1052. AND THE FINAL ROUND OF THE
MASTER'S TOURNAMENT IS SET TO
TEE OFF ON SUNDAY.
Copy !req
1053. MASTER'S TOURNAMENT IS SET TO
TEE OFF ON SUNDAY.
HERE WITH HIS UNIQUE TAKE IN THE
Copy !req
1054. TEE OFF ON SUNDAY.
HERE WITH HIS UNIQUE TAKE IN THE
WORLD OF SPORTS, VETERAN
Copy !req
1055. HERE WITH HIS UNIQUE TAKE IN THE
WORLD OF SPORTS, VETERAN
STAND-UP COMEDIAN
Copy !req
1056. WORLD OF SPORTS, VETERAN
STAND-UP COMEDIAN
BRUCE CHANDLING.
Copy !req
1057. STAND-UP COMEDIAN
BRUCE CHANDLING.
Copy !req
1058. BRUCE CHANDLING.
IT'S SO GOOD TO SEE YOU HERE,
Copy !req
1059. IT'S SO GOOD TO SEE YOU HERE,
MICHAEL.
Copy !req
1060. IT'S SO GOOD TO SEE YOU HERE,
MICHAEL.
CAN WE HURRY THIS UP, I'M TRYING
Copy !req
1061. MICHAEL.
CAN WE HURRY THIS UP, I'M TRYING
TO GET HOME IN TIME TO WATCH THE
Copy !req
1062. CAN WE HURRY THIS UP, I'M TRYING
TO GET HOME IN TIME TO WATCH THE
BIG GAME.
Copy !req
1063. TO GET HOME IN TIME TO WATCH THE
BIG GAME.
YEAH, I DON'T THINK ANY GAMES
Copy !req
1064. BIG GAME.
YEAH, I DON'T THINK ANY GAMES
ARE STARTING THIS LATE.
Copy !req
1065. YEAH, I DON'T THINK ANY GAMES
ARE STARTING THIS LATE.
EXACTLY.
Copy !req
1066. ARE STARTING THIS LATE.
EXACTLY.
THAT'S THE THING, RIGHT?
Copy !req
1067. EXACTLY.
THAT'S THE THING, RIGHT?
YOU KNOW US MEN, WE'RE ON THE
Copy !req
1068. THAT'S THE THING, RIGHT?
YOU KNOW US MEN, WE'RE ON THE
SAME PAGE.
Copy !req
1069. YOU KNOW US MEN, WE'RE ON THE
SAME PAGE.
AND ONE THING WE CAN ALL AGREE
Copy !req
1070. SAME PAGE.
AND ONE THING WE CAN ALL AGREE
ON IS THAT WOMEN DO NOT GET
Copy !req
1071. AND ONE THING WE CAN ALL AGREE
ON IS THAT WOMEN DO NOT GET
SPORTS.
Copy !req
1072. ON IS THAT WOMEN DO NOT GET
SPORTS.
Copy !req
1073. SPORTS.
THAT'S YOUR UNIQUE TAKE?
Copy !req
1074. THAT'S YOUR UNIQUE TAKE?
HEY, HEAR ME OUT, MICHAEL.
Copy !req
1075. THAT'S YOUR UNIQUE TAKE?
HEY, HEAR ME OUT, MICHAEL.
I BRING MY GIRL TO THE BALL
Copy !req
1076. HEY, HEAR ME OUT, MICHAEL.
I BRING MY GIRL TO THE BALL
GAME, THE WHOLE TIME SHE GOES,
Copy !req
1077. I BRING MY GIRL TO THE BALL
GAME, THE WHOLE TIME SHE GOES,
WHO'S WINNING BRUCE?
Copy !req
1078. GAME, THE WHOLE TIME SHE GOES,
WHO'S WINNING BRUCE?
WHICH TEAM IS WHICH?
Copy !req
1079. WHO'S WINNING BRUCE?
WHICH TEAM IS WHICH?
WHY AREN'T THEY ALL SHOPPING?
Copy !req
1080. WHICH TEAM IS WHICH?
WHY AREN'T THEY ALL SHOPPING?
I'M ASKING MYSELF, AM I WATCHING
Copy !req
1081. WHY AREN'T THEY ALL SHOPPING?
I'M ASKING MYSELF, AM I WATCHING
A BASEBALL GAME OR SOLVING A
Copy !req
1082. I'M ASKING MYSELF, AM I WATCHING
A BASEBALL GAME OR SOLVING A
MYSTERY?
Copy !req
1083. A BASEBALL GAME OR SOLVING A
MYSTERY?
MYSTERY?
Copy !req
1084. IS THAT THE WHOLE JOKE?
UH-HUH.
THESE DAYS, THEY'LL TURN
Copy !req
1085. UH-HUH.
THESE DAYS, THEY'LL TURN
ANYTHING INTO A SPORT.
Copy !req
1086. THESE DAYS, THEY'LL TURN
ANYTHING INTO A SPORT.
OKAY?
Copy !req
1087. ANYTHING INTO A SPORT.
OKAY?
HORSE RACING.
Copy !req
1088. OKAY?
HORSE RACING.
YOU HEARD ABOUT THIS?
Copy !req
1089. HORSE RACING.
YOU HEARD ABOUT THIS?
SURE, MAN.
Copy !req
1090. YOU HEARD ABOUT THIS?
SURE, MAN.
YOU SEEN THIS?
Copy !req
1091. SURE, MAN.
YOU SEEN THIS?
THIS IS WHERE THEY PUT A
Copy !req
1092. YOU SEEN THIS?
THIS IS WHERE THEY PUT A
PERSON ON TOP OF A HORSE AND
Copy !req
1093. THIS IS WHERE THEY PUT A
PERSON ON TOP OF A HORSE AND
RIDE AROUND IN A CIRCLE.
Copy !req
1094. PERSON ON TOP OF A HORSE AND
RIDE AROUND IN A CIRCLE.
I DON'T KNOW ABOUT YOU, MICHAEL,
Copy !req
1095. RIDE AROUND IN A CIRCLE.
I DON'T KNOW ABOUT YOU, MICHAEL,
I NEVER HEARD ABOUT A GUY ON A
Copy !req
1096. I DON'T KNOW ABOUT YOU, MICHAEL,
I NEVER HEARD ABOUT A GUY ON A
HORSE.
Copy !req
1097. I NEVER HEARD ABOUT A GUY ON A
HORSE.
WE'RE LIKE COWBOYS.
Copy !req
1098. HORSE.
WE'RE LIKE COWBOYS.
I'M SORRY, DID YOU RUN THESE
Copy !req
1099. WE'RE LIKE COWBOYS.
I'M SORRY, DID YOU RUN THESE
JOKES BY ANYBODY.
Copy !req
1100. I'M SORRY, DID YOU RUN THESE
JOKES BY ANYBODY.
DO YOU HAVE ANY FRIENDS YOU CAN
Copy !req
1101. JOKES BY ANYBODY.
DO YOU HAVE ANY FRIENDS YOU CAN
WORK THIS MATERIAL OUT ON FIRST
Copy !req
1102. DO YOU HAVE ANY FRIENDS YOU CAN
WORK THIS MATERIAL OUT ON FIRST
BEFORE YOU COME ON NATIONAL TV?
Copy !req
1103. WORK THIS MATERIAL OUT ON FIRST
BEFORE YOU COME ON NATIONAL TV?
I GUESS, NO, I DON'T.
Copy !req
1104. BEFORE YOU COME ON NATIONAL TV?
I GUESS, NO, I DON'T.
MY BAD, MAN, SORRY.
Copy !req
1105. I GUESS, NO, I DON'T.
MY BAD, MAN, SORRY.
AND NOT ONLY DO PEOPLE NOT
Copy !req
1106. MY BAD, MAN, SORRY.
AND NOT ONLY DO PEOPLE NOT
WANT TO BE AROUND ME, BECAUSE
Copy !req
1107. AND NOT ONLY DO PEOPLE NOT
WANT TO BE AROUND ME, BECAUSE
THEY THINK I'M BORING, BUT IT
Copy !req
1108. WANT TO BE AROUND ME, BECAUSE
THEY THINK I'M BORING, BUT IT
PROBABLY DOESN'T HELP THAT I'M
Copy !req
1109. THEY THINK I'M BORING, BUT IT
PROBABLY DOESN'T HELP THAT I'M
ALSO VERY POOR.
Copy !req
1110. PROBABLY DOESN'T HELP THAT I'M
ALSO VERY POOR.
GEEZ, ALL RIGHT.
Copy !req
1111. ALSO VERY POOR.
GEEZ, ALL RIGHT.
YOU CAN CALL ME MR. WORTHLESS
Copy !req
1112. GEEZ, ALL RIGHT.
YOU CAN CALL ME MR. WORTHLESS
PILE OF JUNK.
Copy !req
1113. YOU CAN CALL ME MR. WORTHLESS
PILE OF JUNK.
OH, COME ON, HEY, BRUCE.
Copy !req
1114. PILE OF JUNK.
OH, COME ON, HEY, BRUCE.
I'M REALLY SORRY, BUT MAYBE LIVE
Copy !req
1115. OH, COME ON, HEY, BRUCE.
I'M REALLY SORRY, BUT MAYBE LIVE
TELEVISION ISN'T THE PLACE TO
Copy !req
1116. I'M REALLY SORRY, BUT MAYBE LIVE
TELEVISION ISN'T THE PLACE TO
WORK ON YOUR PERSONAL ISSUES.
Copy !req
1117. TELEVISION ISN'T THE PLACE TO
WORK ON YOUR PERSONAL ISSUES.
I GUESS THE ONLY ISSUE I HAVE
Copy !req
1118. WORK ON YOUR PERSONAL ISSUES.
I GUESS THE ONLY ISSUE I HAVE
WORKED OUT IS THAT —
Copy !req
1119. I GUESS THE ONLY ISSUE I HAVE
WORKED OUT IS THAT —
Copy !req
1120. WORKED OUT IS THAT —
— WOMEN DO NOT GET SPORTS.
Copy !req
1121. — WOMEN DO NOT GET SPORTS.
BRUCE CHANDLING, EVERYBODY.
Copy !req
1122. — WOMEN DO NOT GET SPORTS.
BRUCE CHANDLING, EVERYBODY.
FOR WEEKEND UPDATE, I'M
Copy !req
1123. BRUCE CHANDLING, EVERYBODY.
FOR WEEKEND UPDATE, I'M
MICHAEL CHE.
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1124. FOR WEEKEND UPDATE, I'M
MICHAEL CHE.
I'M COLIN JOST, GOOD NIGHT.
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1125. > EXHAUSTION, STARVATION,
DEHYDRATION.
WHO WILL SURVIVE THEM ALL TO
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1126. DEHYDRATION.
WHO WILL SURVIVE THEM ALL TO
LAST "100 DAYS IN THE JUNGLE"?
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1127. WHO WILL SURVIVE THEM ALL TO
LAST "100 DAYS IN THE JUNGLE"?
MICHAEL, REBECCA, NATHAN, YOU'VE
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1128. LAST "100 DAYS IN THE JUNGLE"?
MICHAEL, REBECCA, NATHAN, YOU'VE
ALL MADE IT TO DAY 94.
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1129. MICHAEL, REBECCA, NATHAN, YOU'VE
ALL MADE IT TO DAY 94.
NOW I KNOW IT'S BEEN HARD, AND
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1130. ALL MADE IT TO DAY 94.
NOW I KNOW IT'S BEEN HARD, AND
I'M SURE YOU'VE ALL MISSED YOUR
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1131. NOW I KNOW IT'S BEEN HARD, AND
I'M SURE YOU'VE ALL MISSED YOUR
FAMILIES?
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1132. I'M SURE YOU'VE ALL MISSED YOUR
FAMILIES?
YES.
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1133. FAMILIES?
YES.
SO MUCH.
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1134. YES.
SO MUCH.
WELL, YOU'RE IN LUCK BECAUSE
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1135. SO MUCH.
WELL, YOU'RE IN LUCK BECAUSE
WE HAVE A SURPRISE.
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1136. WELL, YOU'RE IN LUCK BECAUSE
WE HAVE A SURPRISE.
WE'VE FLOWN IN A LOVED ONE FOR
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1137. WE HAVE A SURPRISE.
WE'VE FLOWN IN A LOVED ONE FOR
EACH OF YOU, AND THEY'RE HERE
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1138. WE'VE FLOWN IN A LOVED ONE FOR
EACH OF YOU, AND THEY'RE HERE
NOW.
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1139. EACH OF YOU, AND THEY'RE HERE
NOW.
MICHAEL, SAY HI TO YOUR WIFE
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1140. NOW.
MICHAEL, SAY HI TO YOUR WIFE
OF 15 YEARS, DENISE.
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1141. MICHAEL, SAY HI TO YOUR WIFE
OF 15 YEARS, DENISE.
DENISE, BABY?
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1142. OF 15 YEARS, DENISE.
DENISE, BABY?
OH, MY GOD!
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1143. DENISE, BABY?
OH, MY GOD!
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1144. OH, MY GOD!
I MISS YOU SO MUCH.
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1145. I MISS YOU SO MUCH.
HOW ARE THE KIDS?
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1146. I MISS YOU SO MUCH.
HOW ARE THE KIDS?
THEY'RE GOOD!
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1147. HOW ARE THE KIDS?
THEY'RE GOOD!
THEY'RE GOOD!
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1148. THEY'RE GOOD!
THEY'RE GOOD!
THEY'RE ROOTING FOR THEIR DADDY.
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1149. THEY'RE GOOD!
THEY'RE ROOTING FOR THEIR DADDY.
REBECCA, SAY HI TO YOUR MOM,
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1150. THEY'RE ROOTING FOR THEIR DADDY.
REBECCA, SAY HI TO YOUR MOM,
JOANNE.
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1151. REBECCA, SAY HI TO YOUR MOM,
JOANNE.
MOMMY!
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1152. JOANNE.
MOMMY!
OH, MY GOD YOU'RE HERE!
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1153. MOMMY!
OH, MY GOD YOU'RE HERE!
OH YEAH, I AM!
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1154. OH, MY GOD YOU'RE HERE!
OH YEAH, I AM!
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH!
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1155. OH YEAH, I AM!
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH!
AND FINALLY, NATHAN, SAY HI
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1156. I LOVE YOU SO MUCH!
AND FINALLY, NATHAN, SAY HI
TO YOUR UNCLE'S FRIEND TERRY.
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1157. AND FINALLY, NATHAN, SAY HI
TO YOUR UNCLE'S FRIEND TERRY.
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1158. TO YOUR UNCLE'S FRIEND TERRY.
WHO?
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1159. WHO?
HEY, BUDDY, IT'S ME, YOUR
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1160. WHO?
HEY, BUDDY, IT'S ME, YOUR
UNCLE'S FRIEND TERRY.
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1161. HEY, BUDDY, IT'S ME, YOUR
UNCLE'S FRIEND TERRY.
HEY, BUDDY, BUDDY, BUDDY, BUDDY.
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1162. UNCLE'S FRIEND TERRY.
HEY, BUDDY, BUDDY, BUDDY, BUDDY.
REMEMBER ME?
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1163. HEY, BUDDY, BUDDY, BUDDY, BUDDY.
REMEMBER ME?
YEAH, YOU DO, I USED TO LIVE IN
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1164. REMEMBER ME?
YEAH, YOU DO, I USED TO LIVE IN
A TENT IN YOUR UNCLE'S BACKYARD.
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1165. YEAH, YOU DO, I USED TO LIVE IN
A TENT IN YOUR UNCLE'S BACKYARD.
I'M SORRY, WHERE'S MY
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1166. A TENT IN YOUR UNCLE'S BACKYARD.
I'M SORRY, WHERE'S MY
PARENTS?
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1167. I'M SORRY, WHERE'S MY
PARENTS?
THEY HAD A THING, AND THEY
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1168. PARENTS?
THEY HAD A THING, AND THEY
COULDN'T MOVE IT.
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1169. THEY HAD A THING, AND THEY
COULDN'T MOVE IT.
BUT NATHAN, HOW DOES IT FEEL TO
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1170. COULDN'T MOVE IT.
BUT NATHAN, HOW DOES IT FEEL TO
SEE YOUR UNCLE'S FRIEND, TERRY?
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1171. BUT NATHAN, HOW DOES IT FEEL TO
SEE YOUR UNCLE'S FRIEND, TERRY?
KIND OF WEIRD.
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1172. SEE YOUR UNCLE'S FRIEND, TERRY?
KIND OF WEIRD.
LIKE, WE'VE ONLY MET A COUPLE
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1173. KIND OF WEIRD.
LIKE, WE'VE ONLY MET A COUPLE
TIMES, AND ONE YEAR WE HAD
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1174. LIKE, WE'VE ONLY MET A COUPLE
TIMES, AND ONE YEAR WE HAD
CHRISTMAS AT MY UNCLE'S HOUSE,
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1175. TIMES, AND ONE YEAR WE HAD
CHRISTMAS AT MY UNCLE'S HOUSE,
AND TERRY MADE US GO OUTSIDE AND
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1176. CHRISTMAS AT MY UNCLE'S HOUSE,
AND TERRY MADE US GO OUTSIDE AND
WATCH HIM THROW A TWO LITER
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1177. AND TERRY MADE US GO OUTSIDE AND
WATCH HIM THROW A TWO LITER
BOTTLE OF SPRITE OUTSIDE THE
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1178. WATCH HIM THROW A TWO LITER
BOTTLE OF SPRITE OUTSIDE THE
HOUSE.
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1179. BOTTLE OF SPRITE OUTSIDE THE
HOUSE.
EVERYONE WAS CHANTING TERRY,
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1180. HOUSE.
EVERYONE WAS CHANTING TERRY,
TERRY, TERRY.
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1181. EVERYONE WAS CHANTING TERRY,
TERRY, TERRY.
BEST DAY OF MY LIFE, BUDDY BOY.
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1182. TERRY, TERRY.
BEST DAY OF MY LIFE, BUDDY BOY.
ONLY YOU WERE CHANTING THAT.
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1183. BEST DAY OF MY LIFE, BUDDY BOY.
ONLY YOU WERE CHANTING THAT.
MICHAEL, REBECCA, HOW ARE YOU
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1184. ONLY YOU WERE CHANTING THAT.
MICHAEL, REBECCA, HOW ARE YOU
FEELING?
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1185. MICHAEL, REBECCA, HOW ARE YOU
FEELING?
YOU LOOK SO SHOCKED TO SEE YOUR
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1186. FEELING?
YOU LOOK SO SHOCKED TO SEE YOUR
FAMILY.
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1187. YOU LOOK SO SHOCKED TO SEE YOUR
FAMILY.
OH, MY GOD.
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1188. FAMILY.
OH, MY GOD.
I AM SO SHOCKED.
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1189. OH, MY GOD.
I AM SO SHOCKED.
YOU HAVE NO IDEA.
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1190. I AM SO SHOCKED.
YOU HAVE NO IDEA.
IT'S CRAZY.
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1191. YOU HAVE NO IDEA.
IT'S CRAZY.
I THINK I'M PROBABLY THE MOST
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1192. IT'S CRAZY.
I THINK I'M PROBABLY THE MOST
SHOCKED.
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1193. I THINK I'M PROBABLY THE MOST
SHOCKED.
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1194. SHOCKED.
JUST BECAUSE, LIKE, I HAVE SEVEN
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1195. JUST BECAUSE, LIKE, I HAVE SEVEN
BROTHERS AND SISTERS, ALSO A
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1196. JUST BECAUSE, LIKE, I HAVE SEVEN
BROTHERS AND SISTERS, ALSO A
GIRLFRIEND OF THREE YEARS, AND
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1197. BROTHERS AND SISTERS, ALSO A
GIRLFRIEND OF THREE YEARS, AND
NONE OF THEM ARE HERE?
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1198. GIRLFRIEND OF THREE YEARS, AND
NONE OF THEM ARE HERE?
UNFORTUNATELY, NO, THEY'RE
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1199. NONE OF THEM ARE HERE?
UNFORTUNATELY, NO, THEY'RE
NOT HERE.
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1200. UNFORTUNATELY, NO, THEY'RE
NOT HERE.
BUT YOUR UNCLE'S FRIEND,
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1201. NOT HERE.
BUT YOUR UNCLE'S FRIEND,
TERRY, IS.
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1202. BUT YOUR UNCLE'S FRIEND,
TERRY, IS.
YEAH, BUDDY, BUDDY, BUDDY!
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1203. TERRY, IS.
YEAH, BUDDY, BUDDY, BUDDY!
DO YOU HAVE ANYTHING YOU WANT
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1204. YEAH, BUDDY, BUDDY, BUDDY!
DO YOU HAVE ANYTHING YOU WANT
TO SAY TO HIM?
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1205. DO YOU HAVE ANYTHING YOU WANT
TO SAY TO HIM?
NOW, ALL OF YOUR FAMILY CAN'T
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1206. TO SAY TO HIM?
NOW, ALL OF YOUR FAMILY CAN'T
BE HERE IN PERSON, BUT THANKS TO
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1207. NOW, ALL OF YOUR FAMILY CAN'T
BE HERE IN PERSON, BUT THANKS TO
THE NEW SONY 4K ULTRA HDTV, IT
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1208. BE HERE IN PERSON, BUT THANKS TO
THE NEW SONY 4K ULTRA HDTV, IT
WILL FEEL LIKE THEY CAN.
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1209. THE NEW SONY 4K ULTRA HDTV, IT
WILL FEEL LIKE THEY CAN.
TAKE A LOOK.
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1210. WILL FEEL LIKE THEY CAN.
TAKE A LOOK.
WE MISSED YOU DADDY.
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1211. TAKE A LOOK.
WE MISSED YOU DADDY.
OH, MY BEAUTIFUL KIDS.
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1212. WE MISSED YOU DADDY.
OH, MY BEAUTIFUL KIDS.
HI NOAH, HI EMILY!
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1213. OH, MY BEAUTIFUL KIDS.
HI NOAH, HI EMILY!
HI, BECKY!
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1214. HI NOAH, HI EMILY!
HI, BECKY!
HOW ARE YOU DOING?
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1215. HI, BECKY!
HOW ARE YOU DOING?
MILO MISSES YOU, HON.
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1216. HOW ARE YOU DOING?
MILO MISSES YOU, HON.
MY DOG, MILO AND MY DAD, I
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1217. MILO MISSES YOU, HON.
MY DOG, MILO AND MY DAD, I
LOVE THEM SO MUCH!
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1218. MY DOG, MILO AND MY DAD, I
LOVE THEM SO MUCH!
DANNY, I NEED YOU!
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1219. LOVE THEM SO MUCH!
DANNY, I NEED YOU!
I MESSED UP, IT'S BAD.
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1220. DANNY, I NEED YOU!
I MESSED UP, IT'S BAD.
COME HOME, IF YOU DON'T, I'M
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1221. I MESSED UP, IT'S BAD.
COME HOME, IF YOU DON'T, I'M
GOING TO KILL MYSELF!
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1222. COME HOME, IF YOU DON'T, I'M
GOING TO KILL MYSELF!
I'M GOING TO KILL MYSELF, DANNY!
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1223. GOING TO KILL MYSELF!
I'M GOING TO KILL MYSELF, DANNY!
WHO IS THAT?
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1224. I'M GOING TO KILL MYSELF, DANNY!
WHO IS THAT?
OH, THIS NEW GIRL I'VE BEEN
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1225. WHO IS THAT?
OH, THIS NEW GIRL I'VE BEEN
SEEING.
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1226. OH, THIS NEW GIRL I'VE BEEN
SEEING.
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1227. SEEING.
SHE STEALS CREDIT CARD NUMBERS
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1228. SHE STEALS CREDIT CARD NUMBERS
FOR A LIVING.
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1229. SHE STEALS CREDIT CARD NUMBERS
FOR A LIVING.
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1230. FOR A LIVING.
AND NOW, ONE FINAL TWIST,
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1231. AND NOW, ONE FINAL TWIST,
YOUR LOVED ONES AREN'T HERE JUST
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1232. AND NOW, ONE FINAL TWIST,
YOUR LOVED ONES AREN'T HERE JUST
FOR FUN.
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1233. YOUR LOVED ONES AREN'T HERE JUST
FOR FUN.
THEY'RE HERE BECAUSE TODAY IS A
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1234. FOR FUN.
THEY'RE HERE BECAUSE TODAY IS A
REWARD CHALLENGE, AND THEY WILL
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1235. THEY'RE HERE BECAUSE TODAY IS A
REWARD CHALLENGE, AND THEY WILL
BE COMPETING ON YOUR BEHALF.
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1236. REWARD CHALLENGE, AND THEY WILL
BE COMPETING ON YOUR BEHALF.
HOW DO YOU FEEL ABOUT THAT?
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1237. BE COMPETING ON YOUR BEHALF.
HOW DO YOU FEEL ABOUT THAT?
ABSOLUTELY GREAT.
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1238. HOW DO YOU FEEL ABOUT THAT?
ABSOLUTELY GREAT.
MY WIFE IS THE STRONGEST WOMAN I
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1239. ABSOLUTELY GREAT.
MY WIFE IS THE STRONGEST WOMAN I
KNOW.
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1240. MY WIFE IS THE STRONGEST WOMAN I
KNOW.
MY MOM IS MY ROCK.
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1241. KNOW.
MY MOM IS MY ROCK.
SHE CAN DO ANYTHING.
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1242. MY MOM IS MY ROCK.
SHE CAN DO ANYTHING.
MY UNCLE'S FRIEND, TERRY,
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1243. SHE CAN DO ANYTHING.
MY UNCLE'S FRIEND, TERRY,
ONCE TOOK ME TO SEE
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1244. MY UNCLE'S FRIEND, TERRY,
ONCE TOOK ME TO SEE
"BASIC INSTINCT."
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1245. ONCE TOOK ME TO SEE
"BASIC INSTINCT."
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1246. "BASIC INSTINCT."
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1247. DURING THE WHOLE MIDDLE PART, HE
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1248. DURING THE WHOLE MIDDLE PART, HE
KEPT HITTING MY LEG AND SAYING,
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1249. DURING THE WHOLE MIDDLE PART, HE
KEPT HITTING MY LEG AND SAYING,
HERE IT COMES.
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1250. KEPT HITTING MY LEG AND SAYING,
HERE IT COMES.
THAT WAS THE DAY YOU BECAME A
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1251. HERE IT COMES.
THAT WAS THE DAY YOU BECAME A
MAN.
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1252. THAT WAS THE DAY YOU BECAME A
MAN.
I WAS 5.
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1253. MAN.
I WAS 5.
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1254. I WAS 5.
TODAY'S COMPETITION IS AN
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1255. TODAY'S COMPETITION IS AN
EATING CHALLENGE.
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1256. TODAY'S COMPETITION IS AN
EATING CHALLENGE.
IN FRONT OF EACH OF YOUR LOVED
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1257. EATING CHALLENGE.
IN FRONT OF EACH OF YOUR LOVED
ONES IS A JUNGLE DELICACY.
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1258. IN FRONT OF EACH OF YOUR LOVED
ONES IS A JUNGLE DELICACY.
WHOEVER CAN EAT THEIRS THE
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1259. ONES IS A JUNGLE DELICACY.
WHOEVER CAN EAT THEIRS THE
FASTEST WINS A REWARD FOR THEIR
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1260. WHOEVER CAN EAT THEIRS THE
FASTEST WINS A REWARD FOR THEIR
LOVED ONE.
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1261. FASTEST WINS A REWARD FOR THEIR
LOVED ONE.
YEAH, CAN YOU STOP SAYING,
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1262. LOVED ONE.
YEAH, CAN YOU STOP SAYING,
"LOVED ONES"?
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1263. YEAH, CAN YOU STOP SAYING,
"LOVED ONES"?
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1264. "LOVED ONES"?
DENISE, YOU HAVE A COW'S
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1265. DENISE, YOU HAVE A COW'S
TONGUE.
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1266. DENISE, YOU HAVE A COW'S
TONGUE.
OH, MY GOD.
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1267. TONGUE.
OH, MY GOD.
I CAN'T EAT THAT.
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1268. OH, MY GOD.
I CAN'T EAT THAT.
YOU CAN DO IT, BABY!
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1269. I CAN'T EAT THAT.
YOU CAN DO IT, BABY!
JOANNE, YOU HAVE A PIG'S
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1270. YOU CAN DO IT, BABY!
JOANNE, YOU HAVE A PIG'S
LIVER.
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1271. JOANNE, YOU HAVE A PIG'S
LIVER.
OH, NO.
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1272. LIVER.
OH, NO.
I THINK I'M GONNA BE SICK!
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1273. OH, NO.
I THINK I'M GONNA BE SICK!
MOM, YOU GOT THIS.
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1274. I THINK I'M GONNA BE SICK!
MOM, YOU GOT THIS.
AND NATHAN'S UNCLE'S FRIEND,
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1275. MOM, YOU GOT THIS.
AND NATHAN'S UNCLE'S FRIEND,
TERRY, YOU HAVE A DUCK VAGINA.
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1276. AND NATHAN'S UNCLE'S FRIEND,
TERRY, YOU HAVE A DUCK VAGINA.
HELL YES, PLAYER!
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1277. TERRY, YOU HAVE A DUCK VAGINA.
HELL YES, PLAYER!
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1278. HELL YES, PLAYER!
ON YOUR MARKS.
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1279. ON YOUR MARKS.
GET SET —
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1280. ON YOUR MARKS.
GET SET —
OH, WOW!
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1281. GET SET —
OH, WOW!
THAT WAS MUCH QUICKER THAN WE
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1282. OH, WOW!
THAT WAS MUCH QUICKER THAN WE
EXPECTED.
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1283. THAT WAS MUCH QUICKER THAN WE
EXPECTED.
TERRY, YOU WIN.
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1284. EXPECTED.
TERRY, YOU WIN.
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1285. TERRY, YOU WIN.
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1286. NATHAN, ARE YOU PROUD OF YOUR
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1287. NATHAN, ARE YOU PROUD OF YOUR
UNCLE'S, FRIEND, TERRY?
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1288. NATHAN, ARE YOU PROUD OF YOUR
UNCLE'S, FRIEND, TERRY?
I WOULDN'T SAY PROUD.
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1289. UNCLE'S, FRIEND, TERRY?
I WOULDN'T SAY PROUD.
HE JUST YELLED, "OH, HELL YEAH,
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1290. I WOULDN'T SAY PROUD.
HE JUST YELLED, "OH, HELL YEAH,
PLAYER!"
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1291. HE JUST YELLED, "OH, HELL YEAH,
PLAYER!"
AND SNARFED A DUCK'S VAGINA ON
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1292. PLAYER!"
AND SNARFED A DUCK'S VAGINA ON
TV.
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1293. AND SNARFED A DUCK'S VAGINA ON
TV.
DUCK'S VAGINA!
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1294. TV.
DUCK'S VAGINA!
WELL, AS TODAY'S WINNERS, YOU
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1295. DUCK'S VAGINA!
WELL, AS TODAY'S WINNERS, YOU
AND YOUR UNCLE'S FRIEND, TERRY,
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1296. WELL, AS TODAY'S WINNERS, YOU
AND YOUR UNCLE'S FRIEND, TERRY,
WIN A FOUR-COURSE MEAL AND A
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1297. AND YOUR UNCLE'S FRIEND, TERRY,
WIN A FOUR-COURSE MEAL AND A
MASSAGE FOR TWO.
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1298. WIN A FOUR-COURSE MEAL AND A
MASSAGE FOR TWO.
OH, HEY, NO CAN DO.
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1299. MASSAGE FOR TWO.
OH, HEY, NO CAN DO.
I GOT STITCHES ALL OVER MY BACK.
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1300. OH, HEY, NO CAN DO.
I GOT STITCHES ALL OVER MY BACK.
A HORSE BIT ME.
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1301. I GOT STITCHES ALL OVER MY BACK.
A HORSE BIT ME.
ON YOUR BACK?
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1302. A HORSE BIT ME.
ON YOUR BACK?
WHAT IS YOUR LIFE?
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1303. ON YOUR BACK?
WHAT IS YOUR LIFE?
WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK ON "100
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1304. WHAT IS YOUR LIFE?
WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK ON "100
DAYS IN THE JUNGLE."
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1305. WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK ON "100
DAYS IN THE JUNGLE."
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1306. > ALL RIGHT, SO WE GOT SODA
MACHINES RIGHT HERE, WE GOT THE
BIG PRIZES, SMALL PRIZES.
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1307. MACHINES RIGHT HERE, WE GOT THE
BIG PRIZES, SMALL PRIZES.
YOU GUYS, WE JUST NEED YOU TO
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1308. BIG PRIZES, SMALL PRIZES.
YOU GUYS, WE JUST NEED YOU TO
INITIAL AND SIGN THIS.
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1309. YOU GUYS, WE JUST NEED YOU TO
INITIAL AND SIGN THIS.
OH.
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1310. INITIAL AND SIGN THIS.
OH.
SURE.
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1311. OH.
SURE.
AND YOU'RE GOOD TO GO.
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1312. SURE.
AND YOU'RE GOOD TO GO.
ABSOLUTELY.
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1313. AND YOU'RE GOOD TO GO.
ABSOLUTELY.
AND CONGRATULATIONS, YOU GUYS
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1314. ABSOLUTELY.
AND CONGRATULATIONS, YOU GUYS
ARE OFFICIALLY MEMBERS OF THE
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1315. AND CONGRATULATIONS, YOU GUYS
ARE OFFICIALLY MEMBERS OF THE
POGIE FAMILY.
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1316. ARE OFFICIALLY MEMBERS OF THE
POGIE FAMILY.
OKAY.
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1317. POGIE FAMILY.
OKAY.
SO I JUST GOT HIRED AT POGIE
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1318. OKAY.
SO I JUST GOT HIRED AT POGIE
PEPPERONI'S, THE PLACE THAT
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1319. SO I JUST GOT HIRED AT POGIE
PEPPERONI'S, THE PLACE THAT
PRACTICALLY SHAPED MY CHILDHOOD.
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1320. PEPPERONI'S, THE PLACE THAT
PRACTICALLY SHAPED MY CHILDHOOD.
GAMES, THE PIZZA AND TOWN, AND
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1321. PRACTICALLY SHAPED MY CHILDHOOD.
GAMES, THE PIZZA AND TOWN, AND
SOME OF THE COOLEST PEOPLE I'VE
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1322. GAMES, THE PIZZA AND TOWN, AND
SOME OF THE COOLEST PEOPLE I'VE
EVER MET.
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1323. SOME OF THE COOLEST PEOPLE I'VE
EVER MET.
YEAH.
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1324. EVER MET.
YEAH.
SOUNDS LIKE A NORMAL JOB TO ME.
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1325. YEAH.
SOUNDS LIKE A NORMAL JOB TO ME.
YEAH.
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1326. SOUNDS LIKE A NORMAL JOB TO ME.
YEAH.
I HAVE A COUPLE MORE THINGS
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1327. YEAH.
I HAVE A COUPLE MORE THINGS
FOR YOU.
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1328. I HAVE A COUPLE MORE THINGS
FOR YOU.
HERE'S YOUR UNIFORM.
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1329. FOR YOU.
HERE'S YOUR UNIFORM.
OKAY.
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1330. HERE'S YOUR UNIFORM.
OKAY.
MY VERY OWN POGIE SHIRT, 'CAUSE
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1331. OKAY.
MY VERY OWN POGIE SHIRT, 'CAUSE
THAT'S NORMAL.
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1332. MY VERY OWN POGIE SHIRT, 'CAUSE
THAT'S NORMAL.
I'M SORRY, JUST TO CLARIFY,
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1333. THAT'S NORMAL.
I'M SORRY, JUST TO CLARIFY,
THAT'S POGIE PEPPERONI ON A
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1334. I'M SORRY, JUST TO CLARIFY,
THAT'S POGIE PEPPERONI ON A
SKATEBOARD ABOUT TO GO ON ONE OF
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1335. THAT'S POGIE PEPPERONI ON A
SKATEBOARD ABOUT TO GO ON ONE OF
HIS FAMOUS ADVENTURES.
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1336. SKATEBOARD ABOUT TO GO ON ONE OF
HIS FAMOUS ADVENTURES.
YEAH, I MEAN I GUESS SO.
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1337. HIS FAMOUS ADVENTURES.
YEAH, I MEAN I GUESS SO.
AND I IMAGINE WE HAVE TO
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1338. YEAH, I MEAN I GUESS SO.
AND I IMAGINE WE HAVE TO
LEAVE THESE HERE AT WORK?
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1339. AND I IMAGINE WE HAVE TO
LEAVE THESE HERE AT WORK?
NOPE.
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1340. LEAVE THESE HERE AT WORK?
NOPE.
YOU CAN TAKE THEM HOME JUST WASH
Copy !req
1341. NOPE.
YOU CAN TAKE THEM HOME JUST WASH
THEM, MAKE SURE THEY'RE CLEAN.
Copy !req
1342. YOU CAN TAKE THEM HOME JUST WASH
THEM, MAKE SURE THEY'RE CLEAN.
SO WE CAN ACTUALLY WEAR THESE
Copy !req
1343. THEM, MAKE SURE THEY'RE CLEAN.
SO WE CAN ACTUALLY WEAR THESE
OUT AND MEET NEW PEOPLE CAUSE
Copy !req
1344. SO WE CAN ACTUALLY WEAR THESE
OUT AND MEET NEW PEOPLE CAUSE
THAT'S NOT A HUGE GAME CHANGER
Copy !req
1345. OUT AND MEET NEW PEOPLE CAUSE
THAT'S NOT A HUGE GAME CHANGER
IN MY LIFE.
Copy !req
1346. THAT'S NOT A HUGE GAME CHANGER
IN MY LIFE.
Copy !req
1347. IN MY LIFE.
I'M SORRY AND HOW MUCH WILL
Copy !req
1348. I'M SORRY AND HOW MUCH WILL
THESE BE COSTING US?
Copy !req
1349. I'M SORRY AND HOW MUCH WILL
THESE BE COSTING US?
THEY FREE, MAN.
Copy !req
1350. THESE BE COSTING US?
THEY FREE, MAN.
THAT'S NORMAL.
Copy !req
1351. THEY FREE, MAN.
THAT'S NORMAL.
YEAH.
Copy !req
1352. THAT'S NORMAL.
YEAH.
OKAY, I'M GOOD.
Copy !req
1353. YEAH.
OKAY, I'M GOOD.
SURE.
Copy !req
1354. OKAY, I'M GOOD.
SURE.
ACTUALLY, I FORGOT SOMETHING,
Copy !req
1355. SURE.
ACTUALLY, I FORGOT SOMETHING,
I'LL BE BACK IN A SEC.
Copy !req
1356. ACTUALLY, I FORGOT SOMETHING,
I'LL BE BACK IN A SEC.
DON'T SAY ANYTHING.
Copy !req
1357. I'LL BE BACK IN A SEC.
DON'T SAY ANYTHING.
WHY WOULD I SAY ANYTHING?
Copy !req
1358. DON'T SAY ANYTHING.
WHY WOULD I SAY ANYTHING?
DUDE, THIS IS AWESOME!
Copy !req
1359. WHY WOULD I SAY ANYTHING?
DUDE, THIS IS AWESOME!
WE WORK AT POGIES!
Copy !req
1360. DUDE, THIS IS AWESOME!
WE WORK AT POGIES!
Copy !req
1361. WE WORK AT POGIES!
WHAT'S THAT?
Copy !req
1362. WHAT'S THAT?
OH, NOTHING, MISS CHARLENE.
Copy !req
1363. WHAT'S THAT?
OH, NOTHING, MISS CHARLENE.
EVERYTHING'S IN ORDER, MISS
Copy !req
1364. OH, NOTHING, MISS CHARLENE.
EVERYTHING'S IN ORDER, MISS
CHARLENE.
Copy !req
1365. CHARLENE.
ALL RIGHT, HERE'S 20 TOKENS
Copy !req
1366. ALL RIGHT, HERE'S 20 TOKENS
EACH, Y'ALL SUPPOSED TO PLAY THE
GAMES SO YOU'LL KNOW ABOUT THEM.
Copy !req
1367. EACH, Y'ALL SUPPOSED TO PLAY THE
GAMES SO YOU'LL KNOW ABOUT THEM.
EXCUSE ME, WHAT WAS THAT LAST
Copy !req
1368. GAMES SO YOU'LL KNOW ABOUT THEM.
EXCUSE ME, WHAT WAS THAT LAST
PART?
Copy !req
1369. EXCUSE ME, WHAT WAS THAT LAST
PART?
EMPLOYEES GET TOKENS TO PLAY
Copy !req
1370. PART?
EMPLOYEES GET TOKENS TO PLAY
THE GAMES.
Copy !req
1371. EMPLOYEES GET TOKENS TO PLAY
THE GAMES.
WE PROBABLY JUST HAVE ACCESS
Copy !req
1372. THE GAMES.
WE PROBABLY JUST HAVE ACCESS
TO WHAT, ONE, TWO GAMES TOPS?
Copy !req
1373. WE PROBABLY JUST HAVE ACCESS
TO WHAT, ONE, TWO GAMES TOPS?
IT DOESN'T MATTER, DUDE.
Copy !req
1374. TO WHAT, ONE, TWO GAMES TOPS?
IT DOESN'T MATTER, DUDE.
PLAY WHATEVER YOU WANT.
Copy !req
1375. IT DOESN'T MATTER, DUDE.
PLAY WHATEVER YOU WANT.
OKAY.
Copy !req
1376. PLAY WHATEVER YOU WANT.
OKAY.
OKAY, WELL —
Copy !req
1377. OKAY.
OKAY, WELL —
FROGGY FRENZY, ROCKO'S
Copy !req
1378. OKAY, WELL —
FROGGY FRENZY, ROCKO'S
REVENGE, ANY OF THEM?
Copy !req
1379. FROGGY FRENZY, ROCKO'S
REVENGE, ANY OF THEM?
YEAH, RIGHT.
Copy !req
1380. REVENGE, ANY OF THEM?
YEAH, RIGHT.
THIS SOUNDS LIKE NORMAL WORK
Copy !req
1381. YEAH, RIGHT.
THIS SOUNDS LIKE NORMAL WORK
ACTIVITIES TO ME.
Copy !req
1382. THIS SOUNDS LIKE NORMAL WORK
ACTIVITIES TO ME.
YEAH, THAT DEFINITELY HAPPENS
Copy !req
1383. ACTIVITIES TO ME.
YEAH, THAT DEFINITELY HAPPENS
AT ALL THE PLACES WE WORK AT.
Copy !req
1384. YEAH, THAT DEFINITELY HAPPENS
AT ALL THE PLACES WE WORK AT.
STALL ON TABLE FIVE.
Copy !req
1385. AT ALL THE PLACES WE WORK AT.
STALL ON TABLE FIVE.
I GOTTA GO DEAL WITH THAT.
Copy !req
1386. STALL ON TABLE FIVE.
I GOTTA GO DEAL WITH THAT.
OKAY?
Copy !req
1387. I GOTTA GO DEAL WITH THAT.
OKAY?
OH, NO PROBLEM.
Copy !req
1388. OKAY?
OH, NO PROBLEM.
YEAH.
Copy !req
1389. OH, NO PROBLEM.
YEAH.
DON'T SAY ANYTHING.
Copy !req
1390. YEAH.
DON'T SAY ANYTHING.
I'M NOT SAYING A SINGLE
Copy !req
1391. DON'T SAY ANYTHING.
I'M NOT SAYING A SINGLE
THING.
Copy !req
1392. THING.
DUDE, THIS IS AWESOME!
Copy !req
1393. DUDE, THIS IS AWESOME!
WE'RE RICH!
LOOK AT ALL THESE TOKENS!
Copy !req
1394. WE'RE RICH!
LOOK AT ALL THESE TOKENS!
Copy !req
1395. ALL RIGHT.
Copy !req
1396. ALL RIGHT.
AND THIS DAY OFFICIALLY CAN'T
GET ANY BETTER.
Copy !req
1397. GET ANY BETTER.
Copy !req
1398. PLEASE TELL ME THAT'S NOT WHO
Copy !req
1399. PLEASE TELL ME THAT'S NOT WHO
I THINK IT IS.
AND POGIE IS WALKING UP TO
Copy !req
1400. I THINK IT IS.
AND POGIE IS WALKING UP TO
TALK TO US RIGHT NOW.
Copy !req
1401. TALK TO US RIGHT NOW.
Copy !req
1402. HEY, YOU MUST BE THE NEW
POGIE RECRUITS, I'M NATHAN.
Copy !req
1403. HEY, YOU MUST BE THE NEW
POGIE RECRUITS, I'M NATHAN.
WE ARE REG AND A.C. SANTANO.
Copy !req
1404. POGIE RECRUITS, I'M NATHAN.
WE ARE REG AND A.C. SANTANO.
COOL, I'LL TRY TO REMEMBER
Copy !req
1405. WE ARE REG AND A.C. SANTANO.
COOL, I'LL TRY TO REMEMBER
THAT.
Copy !req
1406. COOL, I'LL TRY TO REMEMBER
THAT.
ANYWAY I GOT FIVE MINUTES BEFORE
Copy !req
1407. THAT.
ANYWAY I GOT FIVE MINUTES BEFORE
THIS DUMBASS 3:00 P.M. POGIE
Copy !req
1408. ANYWAY I GOT FIVE MINUTES BEFORE
THIS DUMBASS 3:00 P.M. POGIE
PARADE.
Copy !req
1409. THIS DUMBASS 3:00 P.M. POGIE
PARADE.
I'LL SEE YOU FOOLS LATER.
Copy !req
1410. PARADE.
I'LL SEE YOU FOOLS LATER.
SEE YOU, POGIE.
Copy !req
1411. I'LL SEE YOU FOOLS LATER.
SEE YOU, POGIE.
BECAUSE I GUESS WE'RE FRIENDS
Copy !req
1412. SEE YOU, POGIE.
BECAUSE I GUESS WE'RE FRIENDS
NOW.
Copy !req
1413. BECAUSE I GUESS WE'RE FRIENDS
NOW.
DON'T FREAK OUT.
Copy !req
1414. NOW.
DON'T FREAK OUT.
I'M NOT FREAKING OUT.
Copy !req
1415. DON'T FREAK OUT.
I'M NOT FREAKING OUT.
DUDE, THIS IS AWESOME!
Copy !req
1416. DUDE, THIS IS AWESOME!
WE JUST MET POGIE PEPPERONI!
Copy !req
1417. WE JUST MET POGIE PEPPERONI!
AND HE'S PLAYED BY NATHAN WHO
SEEMS LIKE A REALLY COOL GUY!
Copy !req
1418. AND HE'S PLAYED BY NATHAN WHO
SEEMS LIKE A REALLY COOL GUY!
Copy !req
1419. SEEMS LIKE A REALLY COOL GUY!
ARE YOU GUYS COOL?
Copy !req
1420. ARE YOU GUYS COOL?
COOL, YEAH, WE'RE COOL.
Copy !req
1421. ARE YOU GUYS COOL?
COOL, YEAH, WE'RE COOL.
Copy !req
1422. COOL, YEAH, WE'RE COOL.
YOU DON'T SEEM LIKE IT.
Copy !req
1423. YOU DON'T SEEM LIKE IT.
AND ONE MORE SLICE.
Copy !req
1424. AND ONE MORE SLICE.
PUT HER DOWN.
PERFECT.
Copy !req
1425. PUT HER DOWN.
PERFECT.
REG, A.C. SANTANO.
Copy !req
1426. PERFECT.
REG, A.C. SANTANO.
YES, MISS CHARLENE?
Copy !req
1427. REG, A.C. SANTANO.
YES, MISS CHARLENE?
THIS IS ASHLIN, THE OWNER OF
Copy !req
1428. YES, MISS CHARLENE?
THIS IS ASHLIN, THE OWNER OF
POGIE'S PEPPERONI.
Copy !req
1429. POGIE'S PEPPERONI.
Copy !req
1430. > AND ONCE AGAIN, MARGO PRICE.
Copy !req
1431. ♪ SINCE YOU PUT ME DOWN
Copy !req
1432. JUST TO DROWN
I'VE BEEN LYING THROUGH ♪
♪ THE CRACKS OF MY TEETH
Copy !req
1433. I'VE BEEN LYING THROUGH ♪
♪ THE CRACKS OF MY TEETH
I'VE BEEN WALTZING
Copy !req
1434. WITH MY SIN
HE'S AN UGLY EVIL TWIN ♪
♪ HE'S A DOUBLE-CROSSING
Copy !req
1435. HE'S AN UGLY EVIL TWIN ♪
♪ HE'S A DOUBLE-CROSSING
BACK-STABBING THIEF
Copy !req
1436. I KILLED THE ANGEL
ON MY SHOULDER ♪
♪ WITH A FIFTH OF
Copy !req
1437. ON MY SHOULDER ♪
♪ WITH A FIFTH OF
EVAN WILLIAMS
Copy !req
1438. WHEN I FOUND OUT YOU
WERE NEVER COMING HOME ♪
♪ I KILLED THE ANGEL
Copy !req
1439. WERE NEVER COMING HOME ♪
♪ I KILLED THE ANGEL
ON MY SHOULDER
Copy !req
1440. SINCE YOU LEFT ME
FOR ANOTHER ♪
♪ I'VE BEEN TRYING TO TURN
Copy !req
1441. FOR ANOTHER ♪
♪ I'VE BEEN TRYING TO TURN
THIS BROKEN HEART TO STONE
Copy !req
1442. NO DARLING I WON'T
SPEAK YOUR NAME ♪
♪ AND I HOPE THAT YOU
Copy !req
1443. SPEAK YOUR NAME ♪
♪ AND I HOPE THAT YOU
WILL DO THE SAME
Copy !req
1444. BUT I PRAY MY VOICE
WILL HAUNT YOU ♪
♪ ABOVE THE GROUND
Copy !req
1445. WILL HAUNT YOU ♪
♪ ABOVE THE GROUND
AND IF I SEE YOUR FACE
Copy !req
1446. AGAIN DON'T CONSIDER ME
YOUR FRIEND ♪
♪ YOU MADE ME FEEL
Copy !req
1447. YOUR FRIEND ♪
♪ YOU MADE ME FEEL
LIKE AN ORPHAN
Copy !req
1448. LIKE AN ORPHAN
AND ACT LIKE A CLOWN ♪
♪ I KILLED THE ANGEL
Copy !req
1449. AND ACT LIKE A CLOWN ♪
♪ I KILLED THE ANGEL
ON MY SHOULDER
Copy !req
1450. WITH A HANDLE OF TEQUILA
SO I WOULDN'T HAVE TO ♪
♪ SPEND MY NIGHTS ALONE
Copy !req
1451. SO I WOULDN'T HAVE TO ♪
♪ SPEND MY NIGHTS ALONE
ALL ALONE
Copy !req
1452. I KILLED THE ANGEL
ON MY SHOULDER ♪
♪ SINCE YOU LEFT ME
Copy !req
1453. ON MY SHOULDER ♪
♪ SINCE YOU LEFT ME
FOR ANOTHER
Copy !req
1454. EVER GET TOO FAR
THEY'RE JUST SUCKING ♪
♪ ALL OF THE GOOD BLOOD
Copy !req
1455. THEY'RE JUST SUCKING ♪
♪ ALL OF THE GOOD BLOOD
OUT OF THIS TOWN
Copy !req
1456. BUT I'M AN OUTCAST
AND I'M A STRAY ♪
♪ AND I PLAN TO
Copy !req
1457. AND I'M A STRAY ♪
♪ AND I PLAN TO
STAY THAT WAY
Copy !req
1458. AND EVEN IF I FALL
FROM MY GRACE ♪
♪ I'M GONNA LAND
Copy !req
1459. BACK ON THE GROUND ♪
♪ I KILLED THE ANGEL
ON MY SHOULDER
Copy !req
1460. WITH A BOTTLE
OF THE BULLEIT ♪
♪ SO I WOULDN'T HAVE
Copy !req
1461. OF THE BULLEIT ♪
♪ SO I WOULDN'T HAVE
TO HEAR HIM BITCH AND MOAN
Copy !req
1462. TO HEAR HIM BITCH AND MOAN
MOAN MOAN ♪
♪ I KILLED THE ANGEL
Copy !req
1463. MOAN MOAN ♪
♪ I KILLED THE ANGEL
ON MY SHOULDER
Copy !req
1464. SINCE YOU LEFT ME
FOR ANOTHER ♪
♪ I'VE BEEN TRYING TO TURN
Copy !req
1465. FOR ANOTHER ♪
♪ I'VE BEEN TRYING TO TURN
THIS BROKEN HEART TO STONE
Copy !req
1466. > FIRST THEY SAID, YOU'RE TOO
SMALL."
THEN THEY SAID, "YOU'RE TOO
Copy !req
1467. SMALL."
THEN THEY SAID, "YOU'RE TOO
BIG."
Copy !req
1468. THEN THEY SAID, "YOU'RE TOO
BIG."
THEY SAID, "YOU'LL NEVER MAKE
Copy !req
1469. BIG."
THEY SAID, "YOU'LL NEVER MAKE
IT."
Copy !req
1470. THEY SAID, "YOU'LL NEVER MAKE
IT."
BUT I DIDN'T LISTEN TO THEM.
Copy !req
1471. IT."
BUT I DIDN'T LISTEN TO THEM.
BECAUSE I KNEW ONE DAY I WOULD
Copy !req
1472. BUT I DIDN'T LISTEN TO THEM.
BECAUSE I KNEW ONE DAY I WOULD
BECOME A NINJA.
Copy !req
1473. BECOME A NINJA.
THE ADVENTURES OF SHANICE
Copy !req
1474. THE ADVENTURES OF SHANICE
GOODWIN, NINJA.
Copy !req
1475. GOODWIN, NINJA.
SHANICE, THE AMBASSADOR'S
Copy !req
1476. SHANICE, THE AMBASSADOR'S
DAUGHTER HAS BEEN KIDNAPPED BY
Copy !req
1477. SHANICE, THE AMBASSADOR'S
DAUGHTER HAS BEEN KIDNAPPED BY
THE RUSSIAN MOB.
Copy !req
1478. DAUGHTER HAS BEEN KIDNAPPED BY
THE RUSSIAN MOB.
THESE ARE PROFESSIONALS,
Copy !req
1479. THE RUSSIAN MOB.
THESE ARE PROFESSIONALS,
SHANICE, BAD DUDES.
Copy !req
1480. THESE ARE PROFESSIONALS,
SHANICE, BAD DUDES.
ALL YOUR TRAINING HAS COME TO
Copy !req
1481. SHANICE, BAD DUDES.
ALL YOUR TRAINING HAS COME TO
THIS MOMENT?
Copy !req
1482. ALL YOUR TRAINING HAS COME TO
THIS MOMENT?
DON'T WORRY, SENSEI, I'M GON'
Copy !req
1483. THIS MOMENT?
DON'T WORRY, SENSEI, I'M GON'
DO SOME NINJA STUFF.
Copy !req
1484. DON'T WORRY, SENSEI, I'M GON'
DO SOME NINJA STUFF.
Copy !req
1485. WHAT ARE YOU GOING TO DO TO
Copy !req
1486. WHAT ARE YOU GOING TO DO TO
ME?
WE HAVE OPTIONS.
Copy !req
1487. ME?
WE HAVE OPTIONS.
IT'S SO EASY, WE GET THE MONEY,
Copy !req
1488. WE HAVE OPTIONS.
IT'S SO EASY, WE GET THE MONEY,
YOU LIVE.
Copy !req
1489. IT'S SO EASY, WE GET THE MONEY,
YOU LIVE.
IF THEY DON'T LISTEN, MAYBE WE
Copy !req
1490. YOU LIVE.
IF THEY DON'T LISTEN, MAYBE WE
RUSSIANS WILL HAVE TO DO
Copy !req
1491. IF THEY DON'T LISTEN, MAYBE WE
RUSSIANS WILL HAVE TO DO
SOMETHING TERRIBLE.
Copy !req
1492. RUSSIANS WILL HAVE TO DO
SOMETHING TERRIBLE.
I'M WARNING YOU, MY FATHER
Copy !req
1493. SOMETHING TERRIBLE.
I'M WARNING YOU, MY FATHER
KNOWS SOME VERY DANGEROUS
Copy !req
1494. I'M WARNING YOU, MY FATHER
KNOWS SOME VERY DANGEROUS
PEOPLE.
Copy !req
1495. KNOWS SOME VERY DANGEROUS
PEOPLE.
DANGEROUS?
Copy !req
1496. PEOPLE.
DANGEROUS?
SHE SAY VERY DANGEROUS.
Copy !req
1497. DANGEROUS?
SHE SAY VERY DANGEROUS.
Copy !req
1498. GREGORY, DID YOU FEEL SUDDEN
YOU OKAY?
Copy !req
1499. GREGORY, DID YOU FEEL SUDDEN
YOU OKAY?
I FELT IT TOO, SUDDEN BREEZE?
Copy !req
1500. YOU OKAY?
I FELT IT TOO, SUDDEN BREEZE?
I DON'T KNOW, I DIDN'T FEEL
Copy !req
1501. I FELT IT TOO, SUDDEN BREEZE?
I DON'T KNOW, I DIDN'T FEEL
NOTHING.
Copy !req
1502. I DON'T KNOW, I DIDN'T FEEL
NOTHING.
I THINK MAYBE YOU HAVE BEEN
Copy !req
1503. NOTHING.
I THINK MAYBE YOU HAVE BEEN
DRINKING.
Copy !req
1504. I THINK MAYBE YOU HAVE BEEN
DRINKING.
Copy !req
1505. DRINKING.
Copy !req
1506. GREGORY!
Copy !req
1507. GREGORY!
WHERE DID THAT COME FROM?
Copy !req
1508. GREGORY!
WHERE DID THAT COME FROM?
Copy !req
1509. WHERE DID THAT COME FROM?
BE STILL, SOMEONE IS AMONG
Copy !req
1510. BE STILL, SOMEONE IS AMONG
US.
Copy !req
1511. BE STILL, SOMEONE IS AMONG
US.
I CAN FEEL IT, SHOW YOURSELVES.
Copy !req
1512. US.
I CAN FEEL IT, SHOW YOURSELVES.
Copy !req
1513. I CAN FEEL IT, SHOW YOURSELVES.
EVERYONE, BE VERY QUIET.
Copy !req
1514. EVERYONE, BE VERY QUIET.
SILENCE IS THEIR ENEMY.
Copy !req
1515. SILENCE IS THEIR ENEMY.
Copy !req
1516. WHAT WAS THAT?
I DO NOT KNOW.
Copy !req
1517. WHAT WAS THAT?
I DO NOT KNOW.
MY EYES SAW ONLY BLUR.
Copy !req
1518. I DO NOT KNOW.
MY EYES SAW ONLY BLUR.
YOU WANT TO KNOW WHAT THAT
Copy !req
1519. MY EYES SAW ONLY BLUR.
YOU WANT TO KNOW WHAT THAT
WAS?
Copy !req
1520. YOU WANT TO KNOW WHAT THAT
WAS?
I'LL TELL YOU, I THINK THERE'S A
Copy !req
1521. WAS?
I'LL TELL YOU, I THINK THERE'S A
NINJA IN HERE.
Copy !req
1522. I'LL TELL YOU, I THINK THERE'S A
NINJA IN HERE.
LOCK THE DOOR.
Copy !req
1523. NINJA IN HERE.
LOCK THE DOOR.
I SWEAR TO YOU ON MY LIFE WE
Copy !req
1524. LOCK THE DOOR.
I SWEAR TO YOU ON MY LIFE WE
WILL FIND THIS NINJA AND KILL
Copy !req
1525. I SWEAR TO YOU ON MY LIFE WE
WILL FIND THIS NINJA AND KILL
HIM.
Copy !req
1526. WILL FIND THIS NINJA AND KILL
HIM.
WHERE IS HE?
Copy !req
1527. HIM.
WHERE IS HE?
I DO NOT KNOW, VLADIMIR.
Copy !req
1528. WHERE IS HE?
I DO NOT KNOW, VLADIMIR.
I HAVE LOOKED EVERYWHERE, THERE
Copy !req
1529. I DO NOT KNOW, VLADIMIR.
I HAVE LOOKED EVERYWHERE, THERE
IS NOWHERE THEY COULD POSSIBLY
Copy !req
1530. I HAVE LOOKED EVERYWHERE, THERE
IS NOWHERE THEY COULD POSSIBLY
BE.
Copy !req
1531. IS NOWHERE THEY COULD POSSIBLY
BE.
Copy !req
1532. BE.
I WAS RIGHT.
Copy !req
1533. I WAS RIGHT.
SOMEWHERE IN THIS ROOM THERE'S
Copy !req
1534. I WAS RIGHT.
SOMEWHERE IN THIS ROOM THERE'S
DEFINITELY A NINJA.
Copy !req
1535. SOMEWHERE IN THIS ROOM THERE'S
DEFINITELY A NINJA.
IS ALMOST LIKE GHOST.
Copy !req
1536. DEFINITELY A NINJA.
IS ALMOST LIKE GHOST.
THERE IS NO —
Copy !req
1537. IS ALMOST LIKE GHOST.
THERE IS NO —
Copy !req
1538. THERE IS NO —
Copy !req
1539. SHOW YOURSELF, FIGHT ME FACE
Copy !req
1540. SHOW YOURSELF, FIGHT ME FACE
TO FACE OR SHE DIES.
Copy !req
1541. TO FACE OR SHE DIES.
I AM THE WIND.
Copy !req
1542. I AM THE WIND.
YOU ARE THE WIND, YES.
Copy !req
1543. YOU ARE THE WIND, YES.
WELL, I AM STONE.
Copy !req
1544. YOU ARE THE WIND, YES.
WELL, I AM STONE.
YOU SEE I AM RUSSIAN.
Copy !req
1545. WELL, I AM STONE.
YOU SEE I AM RUSSIAN.
AND THE RUSSIAN STONE DOES NOT
Copy !req
1546. YOU SEE I AM RUSSIAN.
AND THE RUSSIAN STONE DOES NOT
MOVE.
Copy !req
1547. AND THE RUSSIAN STONE DOES NOT
MOVE.
RUSSIAN STONE HAVE STAYED IN
Copy !req
1548. MOVE.
RUSSIAN STONE HAVE STAYED IN
PLACE, THROUGH THOUSANDS OF
Copy !req
1549. RUSSIAN STONE HAVE STAYED IN
PLACE, THROUGH THOUSANDS OF
WINTERS.
Copy !req
1550. PLACE, THROUGH THOUSANDS OF
WINTERS.
THROUGH STALIN.
Copy !req
1551. WINTERS.
THROUGH STALIN.
THROUGH HITLER.
Copy !req
1552. THROUGH STALIN.
THROUGH HITLER.
OH, MY GOODNESS, YOU SAVED MY
Copy !req
1553. THROUGH HITLER.
OH, MY GOODNESS, YOU SAVED MY
LIFE.
Copy !req
1554. OH, MY GOODNESS, YOU SAVED MY
LIFE.
WHO ARE YOU?
Copy !req
1555. LIFE.
WHO ARE YOU?
ME, I'M A NINJA, AND A
Copy !req
1556. WHO ARE YOU?
ME, I'M A NINJA, AND A
CASHIER FROM KOHL'S.
Copy !req
1557. ME, I'M A NINJA, AND A
CASHIER FROM KOHL'S.
Copy !req
1558. > THIS IS A STORY ABOUT
SELF-IMPROVEMENT, THIS IS THE
BIO PICK OF ALL MEDIA.
Copy !req
1559. SELF-IMPROVEMENT, THIS IS THE
BIO PICK OF ALL MEDIA.
THIS IS OPRAH WIN FRIDAY.
Copy !req
1560. BIO PICK OF ALL MEDIA.
THIS IS OPRAH WIN FRIDAY.
STARRING MICHAEL BRYANT AS OPRAH
Copy !req
1561. THIS IS OPRAH WIN FRIDAY.
STARRING MICHAEL BRYANT AS OPRAH
WIN FRIDAY.
Copy !req
1562. STARRING MICHAEL BRYANT AS OPRAH
WIN FRIDAY.
Copy !req
1563. WIN FRIDAY.
HEY, GUYS.
Copy !req
1564. HEY, GUYS.
♪ MISS BLACK TENNESSEE ♪
OPRAH WINFREY, YOU ARE
Copy !req
1565. OPRAH WINFREY, YOU ARE
MISS BLACK TENNESSEE.
YES, SWEET!
Copy !req
1566. MISS BLACK TENNESSEE.
YES, SWEET!
CONGRATULATIONS, YOUNG LADY.
Copy !req
1567. YES, SWEET!
CONGRATULATIONS, YOUNG LADY.
WHAT ARE SOME OF YOUR GOALS IN
Copy !req
1568. CONGRATULATIONS, YOUNG LADY.
WHAT ARE SOME OF YOUR GOALS IN
LIFE?
Copy !req
1569. WHAT ARE SOME OF YOUR GOALS IN
LIFE?
I'D LIKE TO HAVE THE NUMBER
Copy !req
1570. LIFE?
I'D LIKE TO HAVE THE NUMBER
ONE TALK SHOW EVER AND INSPIRE
Copy !req
1571. I'D LIKE TO HAVE THE NUMBER
ONE TALK SHOW EVER AND INSPIRE
PEOPLE TO READ MORE AND FOR
Copy !req
1572. ONE TALK SHOW EVER AND INSPIRE
PEOPLE TO READ MORE AND FOR
WOMEN TO BE STRONG, SPIRITUALLY.
Copy !req
1573. WOMEN TO BE STRONG, SPIRITUALLY.
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1574. YEAH, YOU HAVE THE BEST TALK
SHOW EVER.
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1575. YEAH, YOU HAVE THE BEST TALK
SHOW EVER.
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1576. BUT OPRAH DID GET THAT TALK
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1577. BUT OPRAH DID GET THAT TALK
SHOW SHE DREAMED OF.
WELCOME TO THE "OPRAH SHOW,"
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1578. SHOW SHE DREAMED OF.
WELCOME TO THE "OPRAH SHOW,"
EVERYBODY, I'M GOING TO GIVE YOU
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1579. WELCOME TO THE "OPRAH SHOW,"
EVERYBODY, I'M GOING TO GIVE YOU
ALL A CAR NOW.
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1580. EVERYBODY, I'M GOING TO GIVE YOU
ALL A CAR NOW.
THERE'S BOXES UNDER YOUR SEATS.
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1581. ALL A CAR NOW.
THERE'S BOXES UNDER YOUR SEATS.
SO GO HEAD AND OPEN THOSE BOXES
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1582. THERE'S BOXES UNDER YOUR SEATS.
SO GO HEAD AND OPEN THOSE BOXES
UP AND GO NUTS, GIRLS.
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1583. SO GO HEAD AND OPEN THOSE BOXES
UP AND GO NUTS, GIRLS.
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1584. UP AND GO NUTS, GIRLS.
YOU GET A CAR, YOU GET A CAR.
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1585. YOU GET A CAR, YOU GET A CAR.
ALL YOU KNUCKLEHEADS ARE GETTING
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1586. YOU GET A CAR, YOU GET A CAR.
ALL YOU KNUCKLEHEADS ARE GETTING
CARS.
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1587. ALL YOU KNUCKLEHEADS ARE GETTING
CARS.
AND HERE'S THE —
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1588. CARS.
AND HERE'S THE —
HERE'S THE OTHER —
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1589. AND HERE'S THE —
HERE'S THE OTHER —
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1590. HERE'S THE OTHER —
HERE'S THE OTHER THING.
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1591. HERE'S THE OTHER THING.
CAN I TALK FOR A MINUTE?
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1592. CAN I TALK FOR A MINUTE?
YES!
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1593. YES!
AND SHE INTERVIEWED THE
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1594. YES!
AND SHE INTERVIEWED THE
BIGGEST STARS IN THE WORLD.
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1595. AND SHE INTERVIEWED THE
BIGGEST STARS IN THE WORLD.
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1596. BIGGEST STARS IN THE WORLD.
THIS IS MICHAEL JACKSON DOING
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1597. THIS IS MICHAEL JACKSON DOING
THE DANCE, A MOONWALK.
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1598. THE DANCE, A MOONWALK.
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1599. OHH!
SINCE JULY, I HAVE LOST 67
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1600. SINCE JULY, I HAVE LOST 67
POUNDS.
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1601. POUNDS.
CHECK IT OUT!
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1602. CHECK IT OUT!
I'M SKINNY.
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1603. CHECK IT OUT!
I'M SKINNY.
HEY OPRAH, BEFORE YOU DO YOUR
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1604. I'M SKINNY.
HEY OPRAH, BEFORE YOU DO YOUR
TALK SHOW, THERE'S SOMETHING I
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1605. HEY OPRAH, BEFORE YOU DO YOUR
TALK SHOW, THERE'S SOMETHING I
NEED TO TALK TO YOU ABOUT.
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1606. TALK SHOW, THERE'S SOMETHING I
NEED TO TALK TO YOU ABOUT.
IT'S JUST THAT, ACCORDING TO THE
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1607. NEED TO TALK TO YOU ABOUT.
IT'S JUST THAT, ACCORDING TO THE
NEW NUMBERS —
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1608. IT'S JUST THAT, ACCORDING TO THE
NEW NUMBERS —
OH, NO.
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1609. NEW NUMBERS —
OH, NO.
YOU JUST PASSED DONAHUE AS
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1610. OH, NO.
YOU JUST PASSED DONAHUE AS
THE NUMBER ONE TALK SHOW.
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1611. THE NUMBER ONE TALK SHOW.
♪ THIS GIRL IS ON FIRE ♪
WOO HOO HOO HOO HOO HOO!
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1612. YEAH, GET IT GIRL, GET IT!
♪ THIS GIRL IS ON FIRE ♪
TOM CRUISE IS HERE.
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1613. TOM CRUISE IS HERE.
I'M IN LOVE.
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1614. I'M IN LOVE.
♪ SHE'S WALKING ON FIRE ♪
WOO!
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1615. WOO!
I GOT TO SAY, I'VE NEVER SEEN
YOU LIKE THIS.
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1616. I GOT TO SAY, I'VE NEVER SEEN
YOU LIKE THIS.
THERE'S SOMETHING ELSE GOING
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1617. YOU LIKE THIS.
THERE'S SOMETHING ELSE GOING
ON HERE.
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1618. ON HERE.
WHO COULD FORGET HER
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1619. WHO COULD FORGET HER
OSCAR-NOMINATED PERFORMANCE IN
"THE COLOR PURPLE."
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1620. "THE COLOR PURPLE."
HI, HELLO.
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1621. HI, HELLO.
DID YOU TELL HARPO TO BEAT ME?
YEP.
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1622. DID YOU TELL HARPO TO BEAT ME?
YEP.
WOW!
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1623. YEP.
WOW!
ALL OF MY LIFE, I'VE HAD TO
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1624. WOW!
ALL OF MY LIFE, I'VE HAD TO
FIGHT.
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1625. ALL OF MY LIFE, I'VE HAD TO
FIGHT.
I WAS THE ONLY GIRL.
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1626. FIGHT.
I WAS THE ONLY GIRL.
I HAD ALL THESE BROTHERS.
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1627. I WAS THE ONLY GIRL.
I HAD ALL THESE BROTHERS.
THEY ALWAYS WANTED TO WRESTLE.
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1628. I HAD ALL THESE BROTHERS.
THEY ALWAYS WANTED TO WRESTLE.
THIS IS A HUGE, HUGE BUMMER.
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1629. THEY ALWAYS WANTED TO WRESTLE.
THIS IS A HUGE, HUGE BUMMER.
DUDE, I'M SO, SO SORRY.
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1630. THIS IS A HUGE, HUGE BUMMER.
DUDE, I'M SO, SO SORRY.
I NEVER SHOULD HAVE TOLD HIM TO
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1631. DUDE, I'M SO, SO SORRY.
I NEVER SHOULD HAVE TOLD HIM TO
BEAT YOU.
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1632. I NEVER SHOULD HAVE TOLD HIM TO
BEAT YOU.
THAT'S ON ME.
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1633. BEAT YOU.
THAT'S ON ME.
STILL BUDS?
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1634. THAT'S ON ME.
STILL BUDS?
STILL BUDS.
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1635. STILL BUDS?
STILL BUDS.
I THINK I'M GOING TO START MY
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1636. STILL BUDS.
I THINK I'M GOING TO START MY
OWN MAGAZINE.
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1637. I THINK I'M GOING TO START MY
OWN MAGAZINE.
THAT'S AMAZING.
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1638. OWN MAGAZINE.
THAT'S AMAZING.
YOU SHOULD HAVE MICHELLE OBAMA
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1639. THAT'S AMAZING.
YOU SHOULD HAVE MICHELLE OBAMA
ON THE COVER.
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1640. YOU SHOULD HAVE MICHELLE OBAMA
ON THE COVER.
OH, I LOVE HER.
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1641. ON THE COVER.
OH, I LOVE HER.
NO, I'LL BE ON THE COVER.
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1642. OH, I LOVE HER.
NO, I'LL BE ON THE COVER.
IT'LL BE ME ON THE COVER.
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1643. NO, I'LL BE ON THE COVER.
IT'LL BE ME ON THE COVER.
I'LL BE ON THE COVER OF ALL OF
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1644. IT'LL BE ME ON THE COVER.
I'LL BE ON THE COVER OF ALL OF
THEM.
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1645. I'LL BE ON THE COVER OF ALL OF
THEM.
YEAH, BUT EVENTUALLY, YOU'RE
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1646. THEM.
YEAH, BUT EVENTUALLY, YOU'RE
GONNA WANT TO —
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1647. YEAH, BUT EVENTUALLY, YOU'RE
GONNA WANT TO —
IT WILL STILL BE ME.
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1648. GONNA WANT TO —
IT WILL STILL BE ME.
I'LL BE ON THE COVER.
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1649. IT WILL STILL BE ME.
I'LL BE ON THE COVER.
THINK OF THE FURTHEST TIME IN
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1650. I'LL BE ON THE COVER.
THINK OF THE FURTHEST TIME IN
THE FUTURE YOU CAN THINK OF.
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1651. THINK OF THE FURTHEST TIME IN
THE FUTURE YOU CAN THINK OF.
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1652. THE FUTURE YOU CAN THINK OF.
I MOCKED ONE UP LAST NIGHT, SEE.
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1653. I MOCKED ONE UP LAST NIGHT, SEE.
♪ COME ON AND MAKE SOME
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1654. NOISE ♪
"OPRAH WINFREY, A LIFE OF
LOVE."
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1655. "OPRAH WINFREY, A LIFE OF
LOVE."
I'M OPRAH WINFREY, AND IF I
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1656. LOVE."
I'M OPRAH WINFREY, AND IF I
HAD MY WAY, I'D GIVE EVERYONE A
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1657. I'M OPRAH WINFREY, AND IF I
HAD MY WAY, I'D GIVE EVERYONE A
CAR, ESPECIALLY GIRLS.
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1658. HAD MY WAY, I'D GIVE EVERYONE A
CAR, ESPECIALLY GIRLS.
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1659. > THANKS TO MARGO PRICE, TO
THE REVEREND AL SHARPTON.
AND GOD BLESS THE GHOST OF JOHN
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1660. THE REVEREND AL SHARPTON.
AND GOD BLESS THE GHOST OF JOHN
BELL USCHI.
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1661. AND GOD BLESS THE GHOST OF JOHN
BELL USCHI.
STILL THINK ABOUT YOU, MAN.
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1662. BELL USCHI.
STILL THINK ABOUT YOU, MAN.
GOOD NIGHT.
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1663. STILL THINK ABOUT YOU, MAN.
GOOD NIGHT.
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