Samurai Jack 2x8

Directed by Robert Alvarez • Genndy Tartakovsky

Clancy Brown as Dragon (voice) • Jennifer Hale as Crow / Bird (voice) • John Kassir as Scissorsmith (voice) • Kevin Michael Richardson as Villager (voice) • Tom Kenny as Peasant / Man (voice)

When a flatulent dragon begins stinking out an entire village. Jack slays the beast and ventures inside it to cure to source of its bellyache.

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Subtitle languages: English • Spanish • Brazilian Portuguese

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1. Long ago, in a distant land,

2. I, Aku, the shape-shifting master of darkness,

3. unleashed an unspeakable evil.

4. But, a foolish Samurai warrior wielding a magic sword,

5. stepped forth to oppose me.

6. Before the final blow was struck,

7. I tore open a portal in time

8. and flung him into the future, where my evil is law.

9. Now, the fool seeks to return to the past

10. and undo the future that is Aku.

11. Turn back

12. while you still...

13. Ah!

14. Poor, unfortunate creature.

15. I'm not poor.

16. What?

17. I might be unfortunate,

18. but I'm not poor.

19. Look at my necklace.

20. That's genuine fox tooth, that is.

21. You're alive.

22. Of course, I'm alive.

23. But, that's no reason to call me poor.

24. Tell me, where is this horrible stench coming from?

25. Oh, you must mean the stench

26. that ruined our crops,

27. that rendered generations of back-breaking labor

28. completely and utterly useless.

29. - That. .. - Yes, that stench.

30. They say...

31. They say it comes from...

32. Oh, mother of mercy.

33. To the shelter. To the shelter.

34. Tell me, villager,

35. how far is it to this shelter?

36. Right around the next block.

37. Hurry.

38. It's right over here.

39. Oh, good gracious. Help us all.

40. The shelter.

41. It's full.

42. Meow.

43. Scissor smith, Scissor smith.

44. How can you be so cheerful

45. while your town lives in such misery?

46. Eh?

47. Somebody say something?

48. I was simply wondering how you...

49. Uh, never mind.

50. Ah, a customer.

51. Top of the morning to you.

52. Actually, I...

53. Right this way, right this way.

54. Just keep that door shut.

55. Keep that miserable smell out.

56. Fresh sausages, only three for a nine pence.

57. Hmmm. Uh, no, thank you.

58. Actually, I was wondering

59. about that smell outside.

60. Ah, then it's a rag you want.

61. We've got burlap ones, flannel ones,

62. seersucker, gaberdine.

63. Have you had your palm read lately?

64. Had any pets who need grooming?

65. How about some nice flint and tinder?

66. Never know when you'll need some fire.

67. Fire rhymes with liar.

68. Liar!

69. Quiet, you.

70. Your pet speaks very well.

71. My pet? That's my wife.

72. Never sell a wizard an expired fishing license.

73. Ah, how about some pickled camel feet?

74. No, thank you.

75. I just want to know where that stench is coming from.

76. Ah, then it's information that you're after.

77. - So you'll tell me? - For a price.

78. But, the lives of your fellow villagers are at stake.

79. Come with me.

80. Look up there.

81. Now, do you see the words

82. "free information" anywhere on that sign?

83. No.

84. Try using this magnifying glass.

85. See it now?

86. No.

87. Well, that's because

88. I don't sell free information.

89. Enough of this foolishness.

90. You will tell me where the stench comes from.

91. - Now! - All right, I'll tell you,

92. for a loaf of bread and a ride on a wagon.

93. Wagon. Squawk! Rhymes with dragon.

94. Dragon. Squawk!

95. Quiet. You'll give it all away.

96. Give what away? What dragon?

97. Nothing.

98. There's no dragon.

99. Dragon, dragon.

100. The smell comes from a dragon.

101. Why, you?

102. So...

103. Where does this dragon live?

104. Eh, nowhere.

105. I'll never tell.

106. You're beginning to arouse my ire.

107. Squawk, spire.

108. Lives on top of the spire.

109. You mangy pigeon.

110. I'll have you for dinner.

111. So tell me, wise crow,

112. where might I find this spire?

113. You, ungrateful beast.

114. You better keep that beak shut.

115. I mean it.

116. Looks like that shut her up.

117. Beast, beast.

118. The spire lies to the east.

119. To the east.

120. That's it.

121. You've squawked your last squawk.

122. Get back here, you mangy...

123. So, the spire lies to the east, eh?

124. Wait. Warrior?

125. Warrior?

126. Wait. I have something for you.

127. Warrior...

128. Do you really mean to fight this dragon?

129. If I have to, yes.

130. Then you'll need this.

131. I've had enough of your bartering, Scissor smith.

132. This one's on me.

133. Sheep's bladder.

134. It'll help you breathe up there in those fumes.

135. Place it over your head like this

136. and breathe calmly.

137. If you have any small children with you,

138. secure your own mask first, then the child's.

139. You will find exits located

140. to the east and south end of the cabin.

141. Beverages will be sewed shortly.

142. Uh... Thank you.

143. Just take care of that dragon.

144. Years ago, I lost a daughter to that beast.

145. At the fork in the road,

146. follow the rocky path.

147. It will take you to the dragon's lair.

148. Where will the other one take me?

149. Space ace.

150. Whoa.

151. Oh, the pain.

152. Oh.

153. You can talk.

154. Yes.

155. You must help me.

156. Yes, I will help you, dragon.

157. I will put you out of your misery.

158. No, wait.

159. You don't understand.

160. There's something inside me that is causing this.

161. Inside of you?

162. Oh.

163. Those poor, uh...

164. Those unfortunate people.

165. All right, dragon,

166. I will help you.

167. Yes.

168. You have to enter me

169. and destroy whatever is responsible for this.

170. Dragon?

171. Am I near the source of the problem?

172. No.

173. You must go lower.

174. It's a baby.

175. A baby dragon.

176. Please hurry.

177. I cannot stand much more.

178. Thank you.

179. Look.

180. Huzzah!

181. Well, I gotta hand it to you, robed one,

182. I never thought you'd get rid of that stench.

183. Hurray! The smell is gone.

184. We're saved.

185. Hurray!

186. At last, we can breathe again.

187. Now, all I have to do is put out these fires.

188. At the right price,

189. I can tell you how to put out this fire.

190. Fire rhymes with liar.

191. Why, you...

192. You rotten, dusty bag of germs.