1. Hey!Copy !req
2. Glasses!Copy !req
3. - Hey!
- Hey.Copy !req
4. Smoking.Copy !req
5. Come on.Copy !req
6. Fishes!Copy !req
7. Hey!Copy !req
8. What's up?Copy !req
9. Oh, my God, there's a jacket.
So cool, that jacket!Copy !req
10. - Hey.
- You all right? Hey!Copy !req
11. I love you, baby.Copy !req
12. You're so great.
- Hey, happy birthday.Copy !req
13. Hey!Copy !req
14. Yeah! Yeah!Copy !req
15. High five! Yeah, high five!Copy !req
16. Hi! How are ya?Copy !req
17. Whoops!Copy !req
18. Hey.Copy !req
19. Hi. Hi.Copy !req
20. Sweet birthday baby.Copy !req
21. Maxine. Come here.Copy !req
22. I fucking love you so much.Copy !req
23. Ooh, I love you, too. What's up with you?Copy !req
24. I got to split.Copy !req
25. What the fuck?Copy !req
26. - I got to go find Alan.
- Oh, Alan, of course.Copy !req
27. - Do you know Alan?
- No, I don't and I'm your best friend.Copy !req
28. I put together this party for you
and your friends,Copy !req
29. and you're just gonna leave?Copy !req
30. Co-dependently speaking,
I'd love to lie to youCopy !req
31. and tell you I'll be back in an hour,Copy !req
32. but I think our friendship
can handle me being honest with you.Copy !req
33. Huh.Copy !req
34. What the fuck is wrong with you?
What the fuck?Copy !req
35. Oh.Copy !req
36. Why did you do that to me?Copy !req
37. I don't know.Copy !req
38. I'll get you a shirt.
If you want, you can still go.Copy !req
39. Okay.Copy !req
40. It's back.Copy !req
41. It's all back.Copy !req
42. Please?Copy !req
43. Please, please, please, please, please?
Please? Please?Copy !req
44. Please, please, please, please?Copy !req
45. Yes!Copy !req
46. Yes!Copy !req
47. I miss you, little buddy.Copy !req
48. We fucking cracked it.Copy !req
49. I want to give you extra to celebrate,Copy !req
50. but we know that would swell
your swim bladder and kill you, so...Copy !req
51. I gotta go find Nadia.Copy !req
52. What's wrong?
You hate that shirt? Too much pirate?Copy !req
53. It looks good.Copy !req
54. Max, I can't go down those fucking stairs.
I'm scared I could die.Copy !req
55. Don't be crazy.
You're fine. You can do it.Copy !req
56. Come on.Copy !req
57. Hey, Mike. Good to see you're back.Copy !req
58. - I'm on the phone.
- And you're still a dick.Copy !req
59. Nadia, take my hand.Copy !req
60. Take it.Copy !req
61. Take it.Copy !req
62. Let's go down together.Copy !req
63. - Oh, whoa, sorry.
- Sorry.Copy !req
64. Hi.Copy !req
65. I haven't noticed you before.
Are you always here?Copy !req
66. I think so.
Yeah.Copy !req
67. All right, well, I'll see you around.Copy !req
68. See you around.Copy !req
69. Come on, man.Copy !req
70. Come on.Copy !req
71. Fucking open the fucking door.Copy !req
72. Fucking A, man.Copy !req
73. Hey! Hey, can you let me in?Copy !req
74. I'm Alan Zaveri's friend.Copy !req
75. No.Copy !req
76. Hey.Copy !req
77. This is a no smoking building.Copy !req
78. Fuck, how'd you move that quick?
What are you, a White Walker?Copy !req
79. Will you put this goddamn thing out?Copy !req
80. My wife smoked a lot,
and she died of cancer.Copy !req
81. - I'm sorry. I'm sorry.
- Put it out, please.Copy !req
82. Listen, listen, listen.Copy !req
83. Between you and me,Copy !req
84. I have recently encountered death
numerous times,Copy !req
85. and I come bearing some good news.Copy !req
86. Life is like a box of timelines.
You feel me?Copy !req
87. No.Copy !req
88. I don't understand what you mean.Copy !req
89. Suffice to say
that while yes, on this plane,Copy !req
90. your wife is dead and smoking kills,Copy !req
91. somewhere she is alive and wellCopy !req
92. sipping a mai tai on a beach, uh...Copy !req
93. on horseback, smoking a cigarette,
maybe with Fabio.Copy !req
94. No Fabio.Copy !req
95. God, you're making me jealous.Copy !req
96. He's a very attractive man, Fabio.Copy !req
97. You're still smoking.Copy !req
98. - You're not gonna let me in, are you?
- No.Copy !req
99. Don't be mad. You're very nice, though.Copy !req
100. Thank you.Copy !req
101. You're nice to look at too. Sorry.Copy !req
102. Not so bad yourself, Joe.Copy !req
103. All right. Thanks for watching out
for the neighborhood.Copy !req
104. - You be careful, will you, please?
- Yeah, sure.Copy !req
105. Sorry for your loss.Copy !req
106. Stop smoking.Copy !req
107. - Oh, you look like you're on a mission.
- I am.Copy !req
108. - It's the best way to do a party.
- Hey, Lizzy.Copy !req
109. Go with purpose.
Triggers people's curiosity.Copy !req
110. - Have you seen Nadia?Copy !req
111. I haven't for a while.
She probably caught some tail and left.Copy !req
112. You know, she can do whatever she wants.
It's her birthday.Copy !req
113. Let's be honest. It's not it.Copy !req
114. She'll do whatever she wants
regardless of the day.Copy !req
115. Oh, Jordana, this is...Copy !req
116. I'm sorry. I didn't—
Uh, what's your name?Copy !req
117. It's— It's fine. It's Alan.
- Alan. Hey.
- Hey.Copy !req
118. I love the name Alan.Copy !req
119. They don't have
any cranberry seltzer here.Copy !req
120. - You want to go to the deli?
- Yeah.Copy !req
121. I'll go with you.Copy !req
122. Uh...Copy !req
123. You— You know,
Nadia wanted me to tell you...Copy !req
124. she regrets telling you that you
shouldn't adopt those mastiff puppies.Copy !req
125. She said that?Copy !req
126. Yeah. She thinks
you would be a great mother.Copy !req
127. See? I told you.Copy !req
128. Oh, my God.Copy !req
129. Thank you. Thank you.Copy !req
130. Oh, God, I'm sorry I'm so emotional.
I have— I have my period.Copy !req
131. I'm about to get mine. She's the alpha.Copy !req
132. I'm gonna go change my tampon.
Thank you for telling me that.Copy !req
133. Uh... yeah.Copy !req
134. Take this.Copy !req
135. It has good karma.Copy !req
136. Ah, fucking A. Oatmeal?Copy !req
137. Hey, man.Copy !req
138. Hey.Copy !req
139. Hey, Oatmeal.Copy !req
140. Horse.Copy !req
141. Yeah, Nadia. Oatmeal!Copy !req
142. Oh, you think this is your cat.Copy !req
143. This little fucking slut belongs
to no one, but yes, that's my cat.Copy !req
144. What's your deal?Copy !req
145. What is anyone's deal?Copy !req
146. Life is a fucking nightmare, right?Copy !req
147. Being a person is a fucking nightmare.Copy !req
148. And that is why I love
this little fucking guy.Copy !req
149. Come here.Copy !req
150. - He wants to go to you.
- Yeah, he does.Copy !req
151. - You choose her?
- That's right.Copy !req
152. You choose her?Copy !req
153. - Hi, sweet one.
- I think he chooses you.Copy !req
154. My little baby boy, you're back.Copy !req
155. - I owe you one.
- You let me cut your hair?Copy !req
156. Well, I gotta go meet up
with my friend, but...Copy !req
157. some other time.
We got time. We finally got time.Copy !req
158. I could really help you.Copy !req
159. I know what I'm doing.Copy !req
160. - Hey. Ferran, have you seen Nadia?Copy !req
161. You know Nadia?Copy !req
162. - Oh, no, no. No, it's not like that.Copy !req
163. I mean, well...Copy !req
164. Well, once, but, you know, it was—
it was casual.Copy !req
165. Don't worry. Okay, look.
I just need to ask her a question.Copy !req
166. Well, she'll be around
to check up on her cat.Copy !req
167. Oatmeal, right?Copy !req
168. Holy shit, man!Copy !req
169. This totally out of character.Copy !req
170. Yo, good for you, Alan.Copy !req
171. Ooh, should I call you James Bond?Copy !req
172. What? No. I'm not James Bond. I'm Alan.Copy !req
173. Yo. Hey.Copy !req
174. Do you sell, um...Copy !req
175. uh, nitrous oxide?Copy !req
176. - Like full-on actual tanks?
- Do I look like a dentist?Copy !req
177. Yeah, okay.Copy !req
178. You should look into it.
Come on.Copy !req
179. - You hear what I just said?
Yeah, yeah, we heard you.Copy !req
180. What's wrong with you?Copy !req
181. Brrr.Copy !req
182. - Shut up.
- You shut up.Copy !req
183. Let's get
whipped cream or some shit.Copy !req
184. You're out of control, dude.Copy !req
185. Fuck off.
You're out of control.Copy !req
186. Ow. Ow.Copy !req
187. Dude, I am so pumped for tonight.
Yeah, yeah.Copy !req
188. Are we gonna call it
or are we gonna keep—Copy !req
189. I mean, if we can't get this...Copy !req
190. - I can get us some blow.
I have a coke guy as well.Copy !req
191. You both have coke guys?
Yeah.Copy !req
192. Do you not have a coke guy?
I am a coke guyCopy !req
193. Look who I found.Copy !req
194. The wild one caught again.Copy !req
195. Feral motherfucker.Copy !req
196. Sweet as can be.Copy !req
197. Here. Come here.Copy !req
198. - How are you? I missed you.Copy !req
199. Hey, Ferran.
- Nadia.Copy !req
200. Show us some of your best condoms.Copy !req
201. Alan.Copy !req
202. Alan, are you okay?Copy !req
203. Hey. So happy to see you.
I'm so glad you're alive.Copy !req
204. You know what?
Give me a little space, hippie.Copy !req
205. - Nice scarf.Copy !req
206. Oh, fuck.Copy !req
207. Oh, fuck.Copy !req
208. Nadia, you seriously don't remember me?Copy !req
209. I'm sorry, man. I think I just have
one of those faces, you know?Copy !req
210. No.Copy !req
211. No, no, no, Nadia, you do know me. We...Copy !req
212. We die, we come back,Copy !req
213. and now we're trying to figure out
how to make it stop.Copy !req
214. Oh, my God. All right, man, you're
starting to give me the heebie-jeebies.Copy !req
215. If you're not the Nadia who remembers me,Copy !req
216. you could die permanently.Copy !req
217. I need you to remember me.
I need you to.Copy !req
218. - Look, dude, dude, hold on, hold on.
- Man, I need you to back the fuck up.Copy !req
219. - Do you know this guy?
- No.Copy !req
220. - I know her better than you do, Mike.
- Do we know each other?Copy !req
221. - You're fucking my girlfriend.
- I didn't fuck her yet.Copy !req
222. - Well, I'm not your girlfriend.
- Not her.Copy !req
223. One of your grad students.Copy !req
224. Oh, Jenny?Copy !req
225. Oh, my God, you are
seriously a fucking dick.Copy !req
226. It's not a deal breaker for me.Copy !req
227. - Okay.
- All right, come on.Copy !req
228. - We didn't get the condoms.
- Also not a deal breaker.Copy !req
229. Eh.Copy !req
230. - Okay.
- Raw dog!Copy !req
231. This way.Copy !req
232. Oh, fuck me. Oh, God.Copy !req
233. Alan! Alan! Be careful, dude.Copy !req
234. What the hell?Copy !req
235. Alan, you're just drunk, all right?
Let's go get you sobered up.Copy !req
236. No.Copy !req
237. No, n— nothing even matters anymore.Copy !req
238. My failure is a failure is a failure.Copy !req
239. Hey, look, man. I know you're wasted,
but I don't give a fuck.Copy !req
240. No, no, no, no. Beatrice!Copy !req
241. Man, fuck, fuck, fuck Beatrice, okay?Copy !req
242. - You're the person I care about.
- Don't touch me.Copy !req
243. - Don't!
- Hey. Hey, man.Copy !req
244. - I'm trying to save your life.
Hey, Little Red Riding Hood.Copy !req
245. Is this sad man messing with you?Copy !req
246. You know, like, take a left at Disneyland.Copy !req
247. Are you all right?Copy !req
248. - I just broke it, man.
- That's okay. We'll take care of it.Copy !req
249. - I'm sorry.
- Just— Just...Copy !req
250. Not you fucking guys.
- But I'll fix it.Copy !req
251. Are we gonna play this game all night
or are we leaving together?Copy !req
252. Ah...Copy !req
253. You are making me want to throw up,
Daffy Dick. Get the fuck out of here.Copy !req
254. - She says that like it's a problem.
- Okay, that's it. Everybody out.Copy !req
255. I gotta help my friend.
I'm sorry, you too, Nadia.Copy !req
256. No, no, no. I don't think you understand.
He's my friend too. I know him.Copy !req
257. - Look, you don't know him like I do.
- Alan.Copy !req
258. He's in a bad way. Inner circle only.Copy !req
259. Dude, I am inner circle.Copy !req
260. No, you're not. Come on.
Give me five minutes.Copy !req
261. - You're fucking up, man.
- I'm fucking up?Copy !req
262. Alan, come on, man.Copy !req
263. Nadia, I know.Copy !req
264. I know. You're—
you're a skeptical person.Copy !req
265. I respect that, but you are
making decisions tonightCopy !req
266. that are putting your life in danger.Copy !req
267. - My God, this guy doesn't give up.
I know.Copy !req
268. Nadia, you're gonna get hit by a car
and die tonight.Copy !req
269. Oh, my God, I'm sorry. Is this some kind
of a creepy Dead Zone scenario?Copy !req
270. - You're actually harassing us, okay?
Yes, you're harassing.Copy !req
271. He's fucking with you to fuck with meCopy !req
272. because I made his girlfriend
see God or something.Copy !req
273. - Let's go.
- Wait, you make people see God?Copy !req
274. Yeah.
I'll take it.Copy !req
275. What I do with my time
is my business, my choice, baby.Copy !req
276. No, no, he is not a choice.Copy !req
277. He is the hole where the choice should be.Copy !req
278. You need to back the fuck off, all right?Copy !req
279. Ten feet or I'm not responsible
for what I might do.Copy !req
280. Yeah.Copy !req
281. - Yeah.
- I'm just trying to...Copy !req
282. consensually screw
this young lady in peace.Copy !req
283. Okay, looks like somebody's trying
to consensually screwCopy !req
284. this young lady in peace.Copy !req
285. No. No.Copy !req
286. Now do guys like blow jobs
or that's a rumor?Copy !req
287. Love 'em, love 'em, love 'em.Copy !req
288. - Oh, yeah?
- Big fans.Copy !req
289. I'll tell you what else too...Copy !req
290. I fucking want you.
Oh, okay.Copy !req
291. Fucking right here.Copy !req
292. - I'll get at it right now.Copy !req
293. - Okay, okay, okay, okay, okay.Copy !req
294. I'm just too busy. I can't.Copy !req
295. Hi.Copy !req
296. Hey, uh, I'm just gonna grab this two-top.Copy !req
297. I'm trying to keep an eye
on that gentleman.Copy !req
298. I'm worried he might kill himself,
but I got to keep it on the QT, cool?Copy !req
299. - What you having?
- Cup of coffee. Thanks.Copy !req
300. Hey, Alan.Copy !req
301. Hey, Alan, are you awake?Copy !req
302. - Mmm.Copy !req
303. Oh.Copy !req
304. Fuck, uh... I gotta take this.
It's my girlfriend.Copy !req
305. Just give me two minutes, all right?
You stay put.
Hey, just grabbing some food with Alan.Copy !req
306. - Yeah.Copy !req
307. Oh, yeah, thanks.Copy !req
308. Fucking God damn it.Copy !req
309. - Do you have Nadia's number?
- Yeah.Copy !req
310. - Can you call her for me?
- Why?Copy !req
311. - Tell her I found her cat.
- I can't lie about Oatmeal.Copy !req
312. Why don't you have her number?
I thought you knew her.Copy !req
313. I do know her. I know her better
than she knows herself right now.Copy !req
314. I do have her number.Copy !req
315. Oh.
Yeah.Copy !req
316. Ah...Copy !req
317. - We really skipped the condoms, huh?
- Yeah, we did.Copy !req
318. Don't worry about it.Copy !req
319. Hey. Did Oatmeal show up?Copy !req
320. No, but Alan's here
and he wanted me to tell you—Copy !req
321. Who? Dead Zone? Nice fucking guy.Copy !req
322. You tell
this Cronenberg-looking motherfuckerCopy !req
323. that I don't like stalkers.Copy !req
324. Mostly.Copy !req
325. He said that you owe him $152,780.86.Copy !req
326. All right, uh...Copy !req
327. I need cigarettes anyway.Copy !req
328. What the fuck?Copy !req
329. She's on her way.Copy !req
330. Ah.Copy !req
331. - Hey.
Want me to go with you?Copy !req
332. No, you lazy fuck.Copy !req
333. And you don't get points
for offering, either.Copy !req
334. Listen, don't touch my stuff
while I'm gone.Copy !req
335. - I'll know.
All right.Copy !req
336. Oh, Jesus. Fuck.Copy !req
337. That's a lot of messages.Copy !req
338. Hey, man, can you spare some change?Copy !req
339. Spare some change?Copy !req
340. - I can do better than that.
- Yeah?Copy !req
341. You're supposed
to get down on one knee, aren't you?Copy !req
342. Let's— Let's— Oh, uh...Copy !req
343. I thought you'd never ask.Copy !req
344. - Yes!
- Yeah?Copy !req
345. - Yes! Yes!
- Yes!Copy !req
346. A hundred times yes!Copy !req
347. - Let me see this.Copy !req
348. Wow.Copy !req
349. - Here. Come with me.
- Yeah?Copy !req
350. Uh, this way.Copy !req
351. No funny business, okay?Copy !req
352. I'm a married man.
Yeah.Copy !req
353. We're, uh— We're true.Copy !req
354. We got one.Copy !req
355. I bet you want a hit.Copy !req
356. Yeah.Copy !req
357. You gonna pay for that?Copy !req
358. Yeah, of course.Copy !req
359. Yeah, of course.Copy !req
360. What's in that wallet?Copy !req
361. You know what? Take— Take it all.Copy !req
362. Take everything. I don't need any of it.Copy !req
363. I don't need any of it anymore. No. Here.Copy !req
364. Yeah. Take it.Copy !req
365. All right. All right, enough.
Let's get out of here.Copy !req
366. Hey, haircut, is he with you?Copy !req
367. - Yeah, man.
Fucking loser.Copy !req
368. - Okay, we're gonna keep his things.
- All right, good for you, man.Copy !req
369. Uh-huh.Copy !req
370. Okay, man, you have got exactly as long
as it takes me to buy these cigarettesCopy !req
371. to tell me what the hell is happening.Copy !req
372. You told me that time is relative.Copy !req
373. Actually, your buddy Einstein said that.Copy !req
374. Metaphysically speaking, you and I
are intrinsically and inexplicably linked.Copy !req
375. Mm-hmm.Copy !req
376. And I'm convinced our true purpose
is to to connect with each other,Copy !req
377. if not help save each other's lives.Copy !req
378. In another world, hopefully
you are doing the same for me.Copy !req
379. Time's up.Copy !req
380. I know where Oatmeal is.Copy !req
381. - Where?
- In the park.Copy !req
382. Hmm.Copy !req
383. Let's go get him.Copy !req
384. I mean, this is
a very particular challenge.Copy !req
385. What's wrong?Copy !req
386. Alan, I am worried about youCopy !req
387. and I'd like to keep you
from hurting yourself.Copy !req
388. Mmm-mmm. I feel terrific.Copy !req
389. All right, Alan,
I— I know what you're up to, okay?Copy !req
390. And I'm sure that you do feel fantasticCopy !req
391. 'cause that's how a lot of people feel
when they've decided to kill themselves.Copy !req
392. The emotional buoyancy,
giving things to strangers,Copy !req
393. proposing to gutter punks, et cetera.Copy !req
394. I'm sorry. Can I lay down? Uh...
I just— My heart's palpitating.Copy !req
395. Are you gonna put me to sleep?Copy !req
396. Mmm.Copy !req
397. Yes. Yes, I am.Copy !req
398. Oh.Copy !req
399. Mmm.Copy !req
400. Would you like to hear a story?Copy !req
401. Sure.Copy !req
402. Okay.Copy !req
403. There we go.Copy !req
404. Did you ever hear the oneCopy !req
405. about the broken man
and the lady with a death wishCopy !req
406. who got stuck in a loop?Copy !req
407. Tell me.Copy !req
408. Once upon a time...Copy !req
409. there was a very special boy named Alan.Copy !req
410. And one day...Copy !req
411. life got to be too much for him.Copy !req
412. So he decided to take a walk
off the side of the roof.Copy !req
413. But on his way down,Copy !req
414. a very tough lady,Copy !req
415. who looked like if Andrew Dice ClayCopy !req
416. and the little girl from Brave
made a baby,Copy !req
417. she caught him in her crazy hair...Copy !req
418. like it was a dolphins' net.Copy !req
419. I love Brave.Copy !req
420. And I love Dice...Copy !req
421. which I'm sure
will eventually become problematic.Copy !req
422. Anyway...Copy !req
423. uh, even though the girl caught him...Copy !req
424. well, now, you see,
she wasn't in such hot shape either.Copy !req
425. You see, life was too painful.Copy !req
426. Or they were too fragile.Copy !req
427. But either way you slice it,
they just couldn't hack it.Copy !req
428. And then one night...Copy !req
429. something miraculous happened.Copy !req
430. They made it through alive.Copy !req
431. Yeah, he's— he's around here somewhere.Copy !req
432. Yeah.Copy !req
433. All right, man,
how'd you know about my college fund?Copy !req
434. - You told me.
- Mmm.Copy !req
435. Well, I never talk about shit from then,
so it seems weirdCopy !req
436. that I would've told somebody
that I don't know that.Copy !req
437. I'm telling you we know each other.Copy !req
438. Okay, great,
what else do you know about me?Copy !req
439. It's your birthday.Copy !req
440. That's why it's weird
that you said I would die tonight.Copy !req
441. I've always been superstitious
about this particular birthday.Copy !req
442. 'Cause of your mother.Copy !req
443. Fuck. Nadia!Copy !req
444. Nadia, wait. Look, I'm— I'm sorry.Copy !req
445. I'm not trying to freak you out
or anything.Copy !req
446. Oh, shit, look who it is.Copy !req
447. No, I know that guy.Copy !req
448. He's self-destructive
and he's fucking dangerous.Copy !req
449. He does not seem to like you, huh?Copy !req
450. Hey, he's mentally unstable. I'm serious.
Get away from him. The guy's crazy.Copy !req
451. - Okay, then.Copy !req
452. - Whoa! Whoa! Hey! Wait!Copy !req
453. - Jesus Christ.Copy !req
454. - Did you just save my life?
- Yeah.Copy !req
455. Why?Copy !req
456. I told you I know you.Copy !req
457. I can't handle this shit, man.
This is just too much for me.Copy !req
458. No.Copy !req
459. No.Copy !req
460. You damn dumb, dumb fucking cunt.Copy !req
461. Fuck.Copy !req
462. Fuck.Copy !req
463. What's wrong?Copy !req
464. I am so fucking happy
that you did not jump.
You promise
if I don't jump, I'll be happy?Copy !req
465. I don't know, man.Copy !req
466. Absolutely not.Copy !req
467. But I can promise you
that you will not be alone.Copy !req
468. Okay.
What now?Copy !req
469. Now we get the fuck off of this roof
before you change your mind.Copy !req
470. I'm sorry. This is all about me.Copy !req
471. Uh, I was seeing this girl, right?Copy !req
472. And, uh, it's early days,
but it could be something, you know?Copy !req
473. And she told me she's got
this crazy boyfriend.Copy !req
474. And I took that to be hyperbolic, but I
never imagined that it would... you know?Copy !req
475. - What? What's the matter?
- Come on.Copy !req
476. Hey.Copy !req
477. Whoa.Copy !req
478. Nadia, where are you going?Copy !req
479. Hey!Copy !req
480. It's wild how they don't hit you
when you look both ways, huh?Copy !req
481. We shall commence!Copy !req
482. Yeah!Copy !req
483. Follow me!Copy !req
484. Yeah!Copy !req