RuPaul's Drag Race 7x4

1. Previously on RuPaul's

2. Drag Race...

3. Fame just rub my nerves out.

4. That's not drag.

5. You'll be acting

6. in Romy and Juliet...

7. And my favorite, Macbitch.

8. Head coach is gonna—

9. head cheerleader

10. is gonna be me, Laquisha Quian—

11. Oh,

12. In seven seasons,

13. I've never seen

14. a car crash like this before.

15. Max, you are the winner

16. of this week's challenge.

17. Pearl, you've been sleepwalking.

18. Wake up, Pearl.

19. Couldn't you sense

20. that it wasn't going right?

21. Nobody knew their lines.

22. I'm not gonna take their blame.

23. Don't want to hear any

24. goddamn excuses anymore!

25. Kennedy Davenport, shante,

26. you stay.

27. you stay. Jasmine Masters, sashay away.

28. Jasmine Masters, sashay away.

29. Oh, Lord.

30. Home sweet home.

31. It's so quiet.

32. Jasmine gave us all that energy,

33. and it's not there anymore.

34. So how did you feel?

35. You know, to do it

36. against your friend,

37. it was hard.

38. It's, like, bittersweet 'cause

39. me and Jasmine are so close,

40. but I just have another chance.

41. Pop the corns

42. and feed the children.

43. Pop the corns

44. and feed the children.

45. Jasmine was just a bad seed

46. in the bunch.

47. Nobody wants to pop the corn

48. and feed the children.

49. That's disgusting.

50. Let me pop this bunion and have

51. the kids feasting for days?

52. Are you kidding me?

53. Who thinks of this?

54. Pearl, did your life flash

55. before your eyes?

56. Yeah, you thought

57. you were going home.

58. I don't know, it's crazy,

59. like, usually I have a blast

60. when I'm in drag,

61. but it was all about me walking

62. with my eyes half closed.

63. I thought I had bedroom eyes.

64. Pearl's been sleepwalking

65. through this competition.

66. Pearl's gonna need

67. to get her head in the game

68. if she wants any chance

69. if she wants any chance of making that top three.

70. of making that top three.

71. RuPaul Drag Race

72. The winner of RuPaul's Drag

73. Racereceives a one year supply

74. of Anastasia, Beverly Hills

75. cosmetics.

76. And a cash prize

77. of $100,000.

78. With our extra special guest

79. judges, Lucian Piane

80. and Jessica Alba.

81. RuPaul Drag Race

82. May the best woman

83. Best woman win

84. Best woman win

85. Yay.

86. Good morning.

87. So last week we got our asses

88. handed to us by RuPaul

89. and the judges,

90. but we're ready to step it up

91. and kick this challenge's ass.

92. It's a whole new day.

93. It's a new hole day.

94. Ooh, girl.

95. She already done had hers.

96. Hey, ladies.

97. Hey.

98. To become America's next

99. drag superstar,

100. you need to rock out with

101. your schlock out, because honey,

102. no queen is unspoofable.

103. Take it from me.

104. I am RuPaul,

105. the elusive chanteuse.

106. We're singing!

107. We're singing.

108. Hello, hello, hello.

109. Hi.

110. You know, in showbiz,

111. one day, you're in on the joke,

112. and the next day,

113. the joke's on you.

114. So for this week's

115. maxi-challenge, you'll be

116. creating music video parodies

117. of one of my favorite artists

118. ever!

119. Me.

120. Working in three teams,

121. you'll have to write lyrics,

122. record vocals,

123. and then shoot your own

124. I'm feeling really good

125. about this challenge.

126. I can sing,

127. and comedy is what I do.

128. Now, to mix things up,

129. I'm gonna leave it up to you

130. to divide yourselves into teams.

131. All right, go for it, now.

132. Yes.

133. Honey, I am a singer,

134. so I get boom, boom, boom.

135. Are we a team?

136. Three people clinging on to

137. me for dear life.

138. I want you on my team.

139. Okay.

140. I look right at Katya,

141. 'cause she's funny,

142. and I look right at Fame,

143. 'cause she can sing.

144. And I love Pearl,

145. so that was our group.

146. Well, I guess that leaves

147. us three.

148. Here, let's do it.

149. Let's just do it.

150. Yay.

151. Come on.

152. I've already been picked

153. last for teams twice,

154. so who the cares?

155. Now, for this challenge,

156. you really need to straddle

157. the world of music and comedy.

158. Gentlemen, start your engines,

159. and may the best woman win.

160. Let's get to work.

161. I think this challenge

162. is complicated.

163. We have to come up with new

164. lyrics to Sissy That Walk

165. and then come up

166. with a music video.

167. The pressure is on.

168. What if it's like,

169. "your face like chalk,"

170. like, and do, like,

171. really bad makeup or something?

172. I mean, that's, like,

173. the obvious thing.

174. We can probably come up

175. with better.

176. Hmm.

177. Violet does have a tendency

178. to be sort of, uh...

179. Bitchy.

180. We just have to get these

181. lyrics, like, really funny

182. and, like—

183. Totally.

184. I really don't want it

185. to be gross.

186. I don't want to rely

187. on grossness or sexuality,

188. because that's what people

189. always, always do.

190. "I don't want to do

191. anything raunchy or dirty."

192. Oh, my God,

193. are you kidding me?

194. Okay.

195. Trixie, Fame, Pearl, and I

196. get Dance with You.

197. I'm pretty confident that we

198. can make it into a funny parody.

199. I want to do

200. "I Want to Tan With You."

201. Let's think of a couple

202. more options and then, well,

203. just, like, maybe two more.

204. We could make it

205. about raunchy, dirty sex

206. because that always is funny.

207. Take my hand

208. I wanna touch your

209. No, it's gonna be gross.

210. Well then come up

211. with a better concept

212. so we don't have to worry

213. about that.

214. Well it shouldn't fall

215. on my shoulders just because—

216. No, I get it, but, like—

217. Thank you.

218. Pearl's really been

219. falling short.

220. It's frustrating,

221. because I'm on a team with you,

222. and we have to pull each other

223. up or else your friends

224. are going home.

225. We just really need

226. to come up with something

227. because we're running

228. out of minutes already.

229. Yes.

230. Let's just do

231. Tan with You.

232. Okay.

233. Hello, hello, hello.

234. Hello.

235. Hey, kitty girl.

236. Hi.

237. I am very excited

238. about this challenge.

239. We are too.

240. Now, do any of you

241. do parodies in your act?

242. I did Rihanna's song.

243. I turned it into...

244. Suh, suh, suh, suh

245. Burb and, and, and

246. A little suburban gal number.

247. Huh.

248. Now, Kennedy, you were

249. in the bottom two last week.

250. Has that lit a fire

251. under your tuchus?

252. It definitely has.

253. I've got to tell all of you,

254. as the competition shrinks,

255. it gets stronger.

256. I'm expecting

257. you all to deliver.

258. I had a

259. last challenge,

260. and Ru is expecting big things.

261. I have to shake it off

262. and keep my head in the game.

263. Hey, kitty girl.

264. Hi, RuPaul.

265. So are you fans

266. of song parodies?

267. If they're clever.

268. Sometimes they get a bit

269. raunchy and vulgar for me, but—

270. Well, don't compromise

271. your Christianity.

272. No, ma'am.

273. So what song

274. are you working on?

275. Sissy That Walk.

276. We want it to be a tie-in

277. to the top three

278. from last season.

279. What have you replaced

280. "sissy that walk" with?

281. "Get ready to clock."

282. Uh-huh.

283. Well, I cannot wait

284. to see what you have to offer

285. because, you know, I'm expecting

286. a lot from you girls.

287. Thank you, Ru.

288. Yeah.

289. Hello.

290. Hi, Ru.

291. Hey.

292. Somehow, I feel like Trixie

293. is the leader of this group

294. just because I know

295. you do a lot of comedy.

296. Turns out making fun of you

297. is a lot easier than I thought.

298. She definitely thought

299. of the concept.

300. What is the concept?

301. "Tan with you."

302. Four ladies

303. who just love the sun.

304. Overcooked, overgrown

305. orangutans.

306. I love that.

307. That sounds fun.

308. So now, with lyrics,

309. are any of you lyricists?

310. We're comfortable enough

311. with each other to say,

312. "That's not funny.

313. We're not doing that."

314. I know, it's been

315. a little bit harsh over here.

316. Who is the most harsh?

317. All right.

318. Pearl and Fame

319. are butting heads.

320. are butting heads. This is not a good sign.

321. This is not a good sign.

322. Gonna turn and burn

323. And tan with you

324. With you

325. My voice was probably

326. the strongest of the group's.

327. With you

328. We're coming up from down—

329. I know.

330. If you would get into

331. the position,

332. we could jump into it.

333. It's gonna be a disaster.

334. It's gonna be a disaster.

335. Hi, season seven queens.

336. Yes.

337. For today's maxi-challenge,

338. we have to do a parody

339. music video.

340. Our team is working with

341. the talented Lucian Piane,

342. RuPaul's producer.

343. So we'll start with—

344. Katya?

345. Huh?

346. Have you ever been recorded

347. before?

348. Uh, yeah, once before,

349. and it was a disaster.

350. Oh.

351. So I'm gonna go with, like,

352. a weird drunk skank, I think.

353. Okay. So that's

354. your character?

355. Yeah.

356. Feel the heat

357. On my sizzling meat

358. As we hit the beach, ah

359. Okay, yeah, let's—let's—

360. Let's stop.

361. It's a great performance.

362. I just think that

363. you're actually going too far,

364. just because we need

365. to get the words across.

366. Okay.

367. Three Long Island Iced Teas,

368. not ten.

369. Gonna turn and burn

370. Gonna turn and burn

371. And tan with you

372. Just try to get

373. all the way up there.

374. You're a little flat.

375. Tan with you

376. Tan with you

377. Tan with you

378. Ahh!

379. Ohh!

380. All right, calm down, Mariah.

381. Grab some oil

382. I've got a place for you

383. You can't sing it up?

384. No.

385. I don't have it, yeah, so—

386. Okay, okay,

387. we'll sing—we'll keep it down.

388. I want to tan

389. Lights on now

390. Was that wrong?

391. Every time I've been

392. on a team I've been with Trixie

393. on a team, and when we get

394. into challenges, I see her

395. kind of buckle.

396. When the sun gets high

397. I'm gonna lay outside

398. At noon again

399. Stop for one second.

400. Let's try to find what pitch

401. you're gonna sing on, so—

402. Let's fry

403. Can you sing up there?

404. Let's fry

405. Up a little higher.

406. Let's fry

407. When the sun is high

408. Okay, so you don't come in

409. on the downbeat, you come in

410. a little bit after it.

411. You got that white boy

412. timing.

413. You have to hear

414. the sound of the music.

415. There should be a "quickerness"

416. to it, 'cause it's, like,

417. sounding like you're

418. drawing them out over the beat

419. that's happening.

420. Come let's fry

421. Come let's fry

422. And we'll lay outside

423. Oh, sorry.

424. Get outta yo' shell, girl.

425. What are you like onstage?

426. I'm wild.

427. I'm totally wild.

428. So where is that right now?

429. Pearl and I are sisters.

430. Pearl and I used to work

431. together in Chicago

432. before she moved to New York.

433. She's just extremely chill.

434. The way she talks, moves,

435. everything.

436. But for drag, she really

437. does need to get herself

438. a fresh pair of batteries,

439. or they're gonna keep saying

440. she doesn't care.

441. Hey.

442. Hello.

443. Yes.

444. We're gonna do a parody

445. of the Sissy That Walkvideo

446. from last season.

447. Courtney Act is played by Max,

448. I am Bianca Del Rio,

449. and Adore Delano

450. is played by Violet.

451. Cue track.

452. I'm so over this wishing

453. That bitches were dead

454. I feel like you're a little

455. nervous.

456. Yeah, I am.

457. You know, Bianca isn't

458. really a singer.

459. That's an opportunity for you

460. to also maybe not sing him

461. so much as just go into it

462. and, like, make if funny.

463. Die, die, die, die

464. Uh-oh, get ready to clock

465. Nice.

466. That was so much better.

467. Paint myself up

468. Throw a wig on my head

469. Are you doing it

470. up the octave or are you doing—

471. I don't know.

472. I don't know all this lingo.

473. I've never done this before.

474. Oh, all right.

475. Your timing wasn't great.

476. I just went off of your cue.

477. There's tension

478. between Lucian and Violet,

479. because Violet has a tendency

480. to snap back at people

481. when they give her

482. constructive criticism.

483. Hello, ladies.

484. Hi.

485. Hello.

486. So Ru assigns our team

487. Let the Music Play,

488. and that bitch is always

489. getting paid,

490. so why don't we write a parody

491. that's all about the products

492. that she sells?

493. All right, here we go.

494. Here's a story of

495. A star named Ru

496. A simple gal

497. Who started like me and you

498. But she bounced

499. Right back up

500. With an album and a t-shirt

501. Album and a t-shirt

502. Album and a t-shirt

503. Well, uh...

504. Ethel Merman and Paul Lynde

505. had a love child bursting forth

506. from Kasha's vocal chords.

507. Hey, bitches, I got paid

508. Oh, my God.

509. Yay!

510. I don't know how

511. exceptionally well we did in

512. that room, but if we don't feel

513. 100%, then we have to make up

514. for it everywhere else.

515. My voice was probably

516. the strongest of the group's,

517. but in a team, you have to worry

518. about other people.

519. Ain't no bad apple gonna

520. rot my crop.

521. Turn the lights on now.

522. It should be like a—maybe a—

523. Since we're up, it's up,

524. out, and then down.

525. Then people should drop back.

526. It'll have depth of field.

527. For somebody with almost

528. no performance experience,

529. Miss Fame has a lot to say

530. when it comes to putting

531. something together.

532. Okay, so get into

533. your last position.

534. This is "sunblock down girl."

535. This is where you end it.

536. No, we're coming back up

537. from that.

538. We're coming up from down,

539. and, "I want to dance."

540. I know, we have to figure out

541. what the next move is gonna be,

542. so just get into the last—

543. Then go ahead.

544. What do you want it to be, girl?

545. Well, if you would get

546. into the position...

547. It's just this.

548. We could jump into it.

549. Why don't we just—

550. Calm your ass down, girl,

551. we have to get on with this.

552. I am calm, you're not

553. listening to me though.

554. Then what are you trying

555. to say?

556. Go ahead, project.

557. I'm trying.

558. What in the hell

559. is going on here?

560. I think we have too many

561. chiefs and not enough Indians.

562. chiefs and not enough Indians. It's gonna be a disaster.

563. It's gonna be a disaster.

564. Wow.

565. I'm totally having a flashback.

566. We just recorded our track

567. with Lucian and now

568. we're going in to record

569. the video with Michelle and Ru.

570. Okay, so listen, you kids

571. can use all the props

572. you want to use,

573. including the pit crew,

574. you just cannot take off

575. their Justin Case underwear.

576. Okay, now think Adore.

577. Party.

578. Hey, violet, did you cinch?

579. No, I have a hog body.

580. Get it, girl.

581. Try, try, try, try

582. Uh-oh, Uh-oh

583. Ha!

584. I hope you trip

585. I hope you fall

586. I, I, I, I

587. Uh-oh, uh-uh-oh

588. Max looks like himself

589. with a wig on.

590. That's not great.

591. So, Max.

592. Yes, darling?

593. You've got to be

594. more Courtney.

595. Courtney was manic

596. in that video.

597. Okay.

598. With her... crazy eyes.

599. Time for my crazy eyes.

600. I'm having a little bit

601. of a struggle

602. with the characterization.

603. Courtney's a little bit

604. harder to make, uh, funny.

605. Whew.

606. Wow, look who's here.

607. Hi, ladies.

608. All right, so let's see

609. what you've got.

610. Here's a story of

611. A star named Ru

612. A simple gal

613. Who started like me and you

614. Kennedy has such a funny part

615. and she's putting her ghetto

616. in it and it just feels so good.

617. But it didn't

618. Take long for her brand

619. To really take off

620. Except for Drag U

621. Girl, that really was

622. A rough spot

623. Okay, let's cut it

624. for a minute.

625. Cut, cut for a minute.

626. Now, what was that Drag Ulyric

627. again?

628. What'd you say about Drag U?

629. That was a rough spot.

630. All right, all right.

631. Well, yeah, it was one

632. of my favorite jobs, so—

633. It did change people life,

634. you know.

635. Bitch, my heart fell through

636. my chest to the basement.

637. We've already laid down

638. the track.

639. the track. There's no time to change this.

640. There's no time to change this.

641. Oh, my goodness, it's tan mom

642. and all of her friends.

643. Back from the Jersey Shore.

644. All right, here we go.

645. Grab some oil

646. I've got a place for you

647. Out on the seashore

648. Feel the heat

649. On my sizzling meat

650. And we're at the beach

651. At noon again

652. Come, let's fry

653. Where the sun is high

654. Gonna lay outside

655. At noon again

656. Put the sunblock

657. Down

658. I want a tan by sundown

659. Melanoma

660. Is this me?

661. Cut.

662. Trixie, why do you keep walking

663. in and out of the shot?

664. I thought it was, like,

665. record your phone thing

666. and you're done now.

667. Just stay in and model.

668. If you're not singing,

669. just ham it up.

670. Mother.

671. Okay, you have some group

672. choreography, let's see that.

673. We also wanted to do a shot

674. where we're low to the ground.

675. If we're doing that—

676. So after we do the group

677. choreography, let's just

678. get on the ground and do that.

679. Yeah, let's get props.

680. Let's just do it

681. on the ground.

682. When the time comes

683. for that choreography—

684. Tick tock, time is ticking.

685. It would be great if we

686. could all roll

687. like rotisserie chickens.

688. You want to try this, girl?

689. Let's do it.

690. All right, let's...

691. cue the track.

692. And the snipers.

693. Okay, okay.

694. Are we kicking feet?

695. The whole shoot seems

696. a little disorganized.

697. Left, right.

698. Left, right—

699. Oh, girl.

700. RuPaul and Michelle Visage

701. are going to think we're a bunch

702. are going to think we're a bunch of disorganized tards.

703. of disorganized tards.

704. Don't let anyone else

705. stand out.

706. You have to.

707. Were there big, butt-gusting,

708. knee-slapping, LOLs?

709. No.

710. Don't be lazy, this is it.

711. Don't be lazy, this is it.

712. Let's work it out.

713. All right, let's do it.

714. Today we're getting ready for

715. our all green eleganza runway.

716. Everybody's just anxiously

717. waiting to see

718. how it all turns out

719. on the main stage.

720. So, girl, I see all these

721. pictures over here with Sahara.

722. Like, how'd you know her?

723. Well, Sahara's my sister.

724. Oh, "Davenport," duh.

725. Yeah.

726. This was, like,

727. when we first, like,

728. started coming out together.

729. Me and my sister,

730. Sahara Davenport,

731. we met in high school,

732. and we shared

733. a lot of the same dreams.

734. Was it a big shocker

735. when she passed?

736. Indeed it was.

737. I mean, we just knew

738. she was in the hospital,

739. and then she passed.

740. Ugh.

741. That was most heartbreaking

742. for me because

743. I'm way in Dallas.

744. I had no money to go to the

745. funeral or anything, so—

746. Isn't that the worst

747. feeling in the world?

748. That was, like, the worst.

749. I mean, that was my sister

750. for real.

751. I mean, like,

752. if we'd come out the same

753. , we would have.

754. Talking about Sahara,

755. it feels good to know

756. that her legacy is still alive.

757. It's not just about me.

758. My family motivated me

759. My family motivated me to just stay in this race.

760. to just stay in this race.

761. Cover girl

762. Put the bass in your walk

763. Head to toe

764. Let your whole body talk

765. And what?

766. Ooh, girl.

767. Welcome to the main stage

768. of RuPaul's Drag Race.

769. Michelle Visage, that color

770. looks gorgeous on you.

771. You should wear it more often.

772. Someone's got to show

773. these bitches how it's done.

774. She bring it to you

775. every ball.

776. And Drag Racesuper fan

777. and super judge, Ross Matthews.

778. Welcome back.

779. Thank you.

780. I'm here to butch it up

781. a little bit.

782. And producer of my album,

783. Born Naked,

784. Lucian Piane is here.

785. Hey, Ru.

786. I just want to ask you

787. from musician to musician,

788. is this the first time

789. you ever used auto-tune?

790. And actress and co-founder

791. of The Honest Company,

792. Jessica Alba is here.

793. Hey, girl.

794. I love the body oil.

795. It smells like creamsicle.

796. I picked out the scent.

797. Welcome.

798. This week, we challenged

799. our queens to create

800. "Rusic" video parodies,

801. and tonight, they're ready

802. to hit the runway

803. dressed in... all green.

804. Sorry about it, Michelle.

805. Uh!

806. Gentlemen, start your engines,

807. and may the best woman win.

808. Now sissy that walk

809. Up first is Pearl.

810. Pearl-aconda.

811. I am slithering

812. down this runway.

813. Instead of wearing something

814. that's green, I'd rather

815. be something that's green.

816. She's got a snake

817. that needs to be charmed.

818. Thanks for the memories.

819. Miss Fame.

820. Green goddess.

821. I love the shoulder pads.

822. Those aren't shoulder pads,

823. those are her shoulders.

824. So I'm wearing this cosmic,

825. alien, galactic, green gown.

826. I've got my face painted

827. for the gods

828. and I'm living for the fantasy.

829. Lana Turned-her.

830. Trixie Mattel.

831. "Domo arigata-ho."

832. I'm giving classic beauty

833. married to Chinese feast.

834. Hold the MSG, but you will be

835. hungry again in an hour.

836. She's been Shang-hi-ied.

837. Katya.

838. Emerald City fashion week.

839. Oh.

840. I am in love with my look.

841. I'm sissying that leg.

842. I feel confident, I feel sexy,

843. I feel stupid.

844. Yes, honey, she is serving

845. green legs and ham.

846. Max.

847. I think she went too big

848. with her cup size.

849. Those are her lucky charms.

850. I'm the three "As."

851. Antique, androgynous,

852. Antoinette, if you will.

853. She's a little bitchy.

854. It's a period piece.

855. Jaidynn Diore Fierce.

856. You know, I was looking

857. for camouflage the other week

858. but I couldn't find it.

859. There she is.

860. Oh.

861. Ah.

862. I'm giving them bright neon,

863. camouflage realness,

864. and I'm feeling it.

865. I ain't trying to hide

866. that much.

867. She's got a sea-weave.

868. Violet Chachki.

869. Oh, wow.

870. Yeah.

871. V is for victory.

872. It's also for vagina.

873. Oh.

874. That is the most perfect ass.

875. Bitch, I am serving

876. lime green showgirl.

877. I'm giving you ass, ass, ass.

878. It's almost as if

879. the Road Runner were

880. a showgirl in green.

881. Meep meep!

882. Kandy Ho.

883. The chartreuse chanteuse.

884. How Green was My Valley

885. of the Dolls.

886. I'm just giving you

887. a sweet and sexy side of me,

888. and hopefully, that sweetness

889. stays in your mouth,

890. and you taste it

891. all the way through.

892. She's a hot Latina.

893. I love when my hair

894. matches my dress.

895. Just the tip.

896. Just the tip.

897. Mrs. Kasha Davis.

898. Cash money millionaire.

899. Yes.

900. Opulence.

901. She owns everything.

902. Mrs. Kasha Davis wants to let

903. everybody know that she may have

904. made some of that money

905. in the red light district,

906. but it's her money nonetheless.

907. She put the "cash"

908. in Kasha Davis.

909. Dollar make you holler.

910. LaGuardia, Newark, Kennedy.

911. Oh.

912. Ooh.

913. She's playing her green card.

914. I'm serving

915. with the utmost confidence,

916. because my hair

917. is whooped and beat,

918. my face is done,

919. and you cannot tell me nothing.

920. All that glitters is green.

921. How much did her hair

922. have to smoke to get that high?

923. Ginger Minj.

924. Ah.

925. She's cute.

926. Perky in pistachio.

927. I am serving you

928. some leprechaun realness.

929. I look like a glamour toad

930. and I feel like a million bucks.

931. Not today, satin, not today.

932. Oh, my God.

933. Now Sissy That Walk

934. It's a hint of green, really.

935. Everyone else has looks,

936. concepts.

937. Are you a stoner, girl?

938. I feel picked on almost.

939. I feel picked on almost.

940. Welcome, ladies.

941. It's time to debut your videos.

942. First up, the parody

943. of Dance with You.

944. Grab some oil

945. I've got a place for you

946. Out on the seashore

947. One more time

948. Or at a tanning booth

949. I want to tan more

950. Feel the heat

951. On my sizzling meat

952. As we hit the beach

953. At noon again

954. Come, let's fry

955. Where the sun is high

956. Gonna lay outside

957. At noon again

958. Turn the lights

959. On now

960. Melanoma

961. Ow!

962. I want to tan

963. I want to tan, tan

964. I want to tan, tan

965. I want to tan

966. Tan

967. Tan with you

968. I want to tan, tan

969. I want to tan, tan

970. I want to tan

971. Tan

972. Tan with you

973. Gonna turn and burn

974. Gonna turn and burn

975. And tan with you

976. Gonna turn and burn

977. Gonna turn and burn

978. And burn and burn

979. Gonna roast and toast

980. Gonna roast and toast

981. And tan with you

982. Gonna roast and toast

983. Gonna roast and toast

984. And toast

985. Turn the lights on now

986. Put the sunblock down

987. I want to tan

988. I want to tan, tan

989. I want to tan

990. Tan

991. I want to tan, tan

992. Tan with you

993. Look at the skin, honey.

994. Pass me the baby oil,

995. bitch.

996. Oh, my God.

997. Next up,

998. Next up, the parody of Sissy That Walk.

999. the parody of Sissy That Walk.

1000. Paint myself up

1001. Throw a wig on my head

1002. I'm so over this

1003. Wishing that these bitches

1004. Were dead

1005. Hear me talking

1006. Constantly in my prime

1007. Top three, all tea

1008. Ego trip all the time

1009. I hope you trip

1010. I hope you fall

1011. I hardly wear makeup

1012. At all

1013. My hands don't reach

1014. I'm just too tall

1015. Sashay away

1016. Sashay away

1017. Try, try, try, try

1018. Uh-oh, uh-oh

1019. I, I, I, I

1020. Uh-oh, uh-uh-oh

1021. Dry, dry, dry, dry

1022. Uh-oh, uh-uh-oh

1023. Dry, dry, dry, dry

1024. Uh-oh

1025. Get ready to clock

1026. Need help packing?

1027. Beat it, queen.

1028. Party.

1029. Not today, Satan.

1030. Courtney knows how to do

1031. sexy.

1032. Cry, cry, cry, cry

1033. Uh-oh, uh-oh

1034. I, I, I, I

1035. Uh-oh, uh-uh-oh

1036. Bye, bye, bye, bye

1037. Uh-oh, uh-uh-oh

1038. Die, die, die, die

1039. Uh-oh, get ready to clock

1040. All right, last but not

1041. least, the parody

1042. of Let the Music Play.

1043. Here's a story of

1044. A star named Ru

1045. A simple gal

1046. Who started like me and you

1047. First she sold a wig

1048. And a lash or two

1049. Absolutely.

1050. Now she hosts her show

1051. And sells her perfume

1052. Got juice.

1053. But it didn't

1054. Take long for her brand

1055. To really take off

1056. Except for Drag U

1057. Girl, that really was

1058. a rough spot.

1059. But she bounced

1060. Right back up with an album

1061. And a t-shirt

1062. And a t-shirt

1063. Album and a t-shirt

1064. Album and a t-shirt

1065. To be a famous

1066. TV host

1067. Be the hostess with the most

1068. Products

1069. Slapping your face

1070. On a candy bar

1071. Letting the world know

1072. You're a superstar

1073. Then say, hey, yay

1074. Hey, bitches, I got paid

1075. But it didn't take long

1076. For her brand to really

1077. Take off

1078. Only 32 years, girl.

1079. Except for Drag U.

1080. Girl, what Lady Bunny

1081. gonna do now?

1082. But she bounced

1083. Right back up

1084. With an album and a t-shirt

1085. And a t-shirt

1086. Album and a t-shirt

1087. Hey, bitches, I got paid

1088. Ain't nobody got time

1089. for that.

1090. You can re-watch

1091. the "Rusic" videos

1092. at logotv.com.

1093. Ladies,

1094. Ladies, I've made some decisions.

1095. I've made some decisions.

1096. You were the weakest.

1097. You are not standing out

1098. for me.

1099. Get your head out of your

1100. ass.

1101. ass.

1102. Ladies, when I call

1103. your name, please step forward.

1104. Katya.

1105. Jaidynn Diore Fierce.

1106. Kennedy Davenport.

1107. This week, each of you emerged

1108. as the star of your group.

1109. But one of you really made

1110. a mockery of everything

1111. I hold sacred.

1112. Kennedy Davenport.

1113. Condragulations,

1114. you are the winner

1115. of this week's challenge.

1116. You will receive

1117. a three year supply

1118. of essential family products

1119. from The Honest Company.

1120. They smell really good.

1121. Thank you so much.

1122. Miss Fame and Ginger Minj,

1123. you're both safe.

1124. The five of you

1125. may leave the stage.

1126. Ladies, it's time

1127. for the judge's critiques.

1128. First up, Pearl.

1129. About your character

1130. in the Tan With Youvideo,

1131. you got to loosen it up, girl.

1132. Come out of your shell.

1133. We want more vitality

1134. and more energy

1135. and more star power.

1136. Are you a stoner, girl?

1137. 'Cause that's, like,

1138. the vibe I got.

1139. I don't know, I feel like

1140. there's plenty of girls here

1141. that are sort of

1142. taking their time

1143. "coming out of their shell,"

1144. but I feel picked on, almost.

1145. All right, thanks, Pearl.

1146. Thank you.

1147. Moving on.

1148. Trixie Mattel.

1149. The idea of Tan with You

1150. is funny.

1151. Were there big, butt-gusting,

1152. knee-slapping, LOLs?

1153. No, but I liked it.

1154. You are not standing out

1155. for me, and I want to see

1156. some identity and some flavor,

1157. and I'm not getting that

1158. from you yet.

1159. If you're gonna be

1160. the comedy queen,

1161. you got to go all the way.

1162. Don't let anyone else

1163. stand out.

1164. You have to.

1165. Next up, Max.

1166. I do enjoy the look tonight.

1167. I do wish it was all green.

1168. It's a hint of green, really.

1169. Okay.

1170. And I'm gonna challenge you

1171. to give us a look

1172. without gray hair.

1173. All right.

1174. I know there's not a lot

1175. of green, but I just,

1176. I think it's so creative

1177. and so cool.

1178. Thank you.

1179. In your group, I also felt

1180. like you were the weakest.

1181. Courtney Act is not easy to do.

1182. She's not a big personality,

1183. but I felt like

1184. you could have done more.

1185. Next up, Violet Chachki.

1186. Your tushy is so phenomenal.

1187. It's just perfection.

1188. Yes.

1189. It's so good.

1190. Your Adore was quite good

1191. too.

1192. I think you could have even done

1193. more besides just the stomping

1194. and the open mouth,

1195. but, again, more bigger.

1196. Right.

1197. Now is your time.

1198. Thank you very much.

1199. Next up, Kandy Ho.

1200. Hola.

1201. If you look around,

1202. everyone has looks, concepts,

1203. and I don't think

1204. a pretty dress is enough.

1205. You were on a team with three

1206. other really big personalities,

1207. and I wanted you

1208. to stand out even more.

1209. You got lost in that challenge.

1210. Next up, Mrs. Kasha Davis.

1211. You walked out in that

1212. outfit, and I love a schticky

1213. queen, and it's a great twist

1214. on the green theme.

1215. Thank you.

1216. So let's talk

1217. about the video, this kind of

1218. sing-talk thing that you do.

1219. Oh, the wig

1220. Do you not think

1221. you could sing,

1222. is that where we're going?

1223. What happened was, I think

1224. Bea Arthur was inside me...

1225. Ha ha ha!

1226. When we were recording,

1227. and I was like,

1228. "There's the voice today."

1229. We have something in common.

1230. Bea Arthur was once inside me

1231. as well.

1232. Wow.

1233. Okay.

1234. All right, ladies,

1235. I think we've heard enough.

1236. While you untuck backstage,

1237. the judges and I

1238. will deliberate.

1239. All right, just between you, me,

1240. and these fierce drag jewels

1241. I'm wearing...

1242. What do you think?

1243. Pearl.

1244. She just kind of feels lazy.

1245. And it's like, don't be lazy,

1246. this is—this is it.

1247. I feel like it's nervousness.

1248. What would you tell her?

1249. Get your head out of your

1250. ass.

1251. Work it out.

1252. Trixie Mattel.

1253. She claims to be campy and

1254. she dresses like a camp queen,

1255. but I've not seen

1256. the personality

1257. that matches that yet.

1258. I didn't really understand

1259. who Trixie was.

1260. She was lost in the video.

1261. You know, I've seen a lot

1262. of audition tapes

1263. and hers was one of the funniest

1264. I've ever seen,

1265. but Trixie has yet

1266. to emerge as Trixie.

1267. Max.

1268. Well, you can tell

1269. on the runway just how creative

1270. she is, and you have to be

1271. intelligent to be that creative.

1272. I was a little underwhelmed

1273. by this characterization.

1274. She was worried more about

1275. being the best Courtney Act

1276. she could be...

1277. Right.

1278. Instead of being the drag

1279. version of Courtney Act.

1280. Exactly.

1281. Yeah.

1282. Violet.

1283. Here's a queen who has studied.

1284. She's really smart

1285. and 22 years old.

1286. Oh, I want to suck

1287. the life out of her.

1288. It's funny, because Violet

1289. in the studio

1290. struggled a little bit

1291. and then I saw the video

1292. and I was, "Oh, my gosh,

1293. that's Adore."

1294. Listen, I think she could

1295. have gone further in the video,

1296. a little more over-the-top.

1297. Kandy Ho.

1298. She didn't stand out

1299. in the video,

1300. but she did a great job

1301. with those ad-libs.

1302. Like, that is what impressed me

1303. the most.

1304. Yes.

1305. But standing next to these

1306. other queens, personally,

1307. it wasn't enough.

1308. It seems like she's really

1309. channeling glamour

1310. and that's kind of it.

1311. All right, Mrs. Kasha Davis.

1312. She did, kind of,

1313. blend in a little bit

1314. too much in the video.

1315. But I love—I don't know.

1316. I love her, because she—she

1317. harkens back to a different

1318. sort of age of drag to me,

1319. and as much—

1320. Why were you looking at me

1321. when you said that?

1322. Ah!

1323. No, I specifically didn't.

1324. Silence.

1325. I've made my decision.

1326. Bring back

1327. my girls.

1328. What?

1329. Bring back my girls!

1330. Bring back my girls!

1331. Welcome back, ladies.

1332. I've made some decisions.

1333. Violet Chachki...

1334. You're safe.

1335. Max...

1336. You're safe.

1337. Mrs. Kasha Davis...

1338. You're safe.

1339. Pearl, you are a magical queen,

1340. but your performance

1341. failed to charm the judges.

1342. I'm sorry, my dear,

1343. but you're up for elimination.

1344. I felt really good

1345. about this challenge,

1346. like, going into it, but—

1347. Pbbt.

1348. Who the knows anymore?

1349. Trixie Mattel,

1350. you went for the comedy gold

1351. but all we got was bronze.

1352. Kandy Ho, your video performance

1353. wasn't sticky,

1354. and your runway look

1355. was not so sweet.

1356. was not so sweet. Kandy Ho...

1357. Kandy Ho...

1358. You're safe.

1359. Trixie, my dear, I'm sorry,

1360. but you are up for elimination.

1361. Two queens stand before me.

1362. Ladies, this is your last chance

1363. to impress me and

1364. save yourself from elimination.

1365. The time has come.

1366. You're to lip-synch

1367. for your life.

1368. I look over at Pearl.

1369. I love Pearl,

1370. but I'm in it to win it.

1371. I know the song

1372. like the back of my man hand

1373. and I think, I'm going out

1374. kicking and screaming.

1375. Let's do this.

1376. Good luck

1377. and don't it up.

1378. When I met you

1379. In the restaurant

1380. You could tell

1381. I was no debutant

1382. You asked me

1383. What's my pleasure

1384. A movie or a measure

1385. I'll have a cup of tea

1386. And tell you of my dreaming

1387. Trixie's giving it her all.

1388. She's showing some camp.

1389. She's showing some dance moves.

1390. She's working the runway.

1391. And I'm enjoying

1392. Trixie's performance.

1393. Feet feet

1394. Walking a 2 mile

1395. Meet meet

1396. Meet me at the turnstile

1397. I never met him

1398. I'll never forget him

1399. I'm so torn because

1400. in a lot of ways,

1401. I feel like Trixie deserves

1402. to be here more than me,

1403. but the other half of me is,

1404. like, "No, you

1405. get your together."

1406. Radiate

1407. Ha ha ha!

1408. I

1409. Something of your very own

1410. Something you can have

1411. And hold

1412. Just to have some dreaming

1413. Dreaming is free

1414. Dreaming, ooh, ooh, ooh

1415. Dreaming is free

1416. Ladies, I've made

1417. my decision.

1418. Pearl, shante, you stay.

1419. Pearl, shante, you stay.

1420. Talk to me, Pearl.

1421. I just love her so much.

1422. I feel—

1423. All right,

1424. you may join the other girls.

1425. It's okay.

1426. Trixie Mattel,

1427. you are an amazing queen.

1428. Keep on dreaming

1429. and keep 'em laughing.

1430. Now, sashay away.

1431. Thank you.

1432. Bye.

1433. It's kind of embarrassing

1434. to be a comedy queen

1435. and go home

1436. on a comedy challenge.

1437. I had more cool looks,

1438. I had better jokes, and

1439. I'm funnier than I was showing,

1440. so that was a bummer,

1441. but I hope I get to meet

1442. but I hope I get to meet lots of fans who like what I do.

1443. lots of fans who like what I do.

1444. Condragulations, ladies.

1445. Now, remember,

1446. if you can't love yourself,

1447. how in the hell are you

1448. gonna love somebody else.

1449. Can I get a amen up in here?

1450. Amen.

1451. All right, now let the music

1452. play.

1453. Take me u-u-up

1454. U-u-up

1455. U-u-up Bye-e-e!