1. Previously
on "RuPaul's Drag Race"...
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2. Each of you needs to create
an original outfit
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3. inspired by Betsey Johnson.
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4. Hello, ladies!
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5. Kori King.
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6. I would have really
garbaged that dress up.
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7. Lydia Butthole Kollins.
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8. There's just a few things
that are off
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9. on the fit about this.
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10. Lexi Love.
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11. This is absolutely fantastic.
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12. Well done.
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13. Jewels Sparkles.
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14. That is the collection.
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15. Condragulations.
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16. You are the winner of
this week's challenge.
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17. Oh, my God.
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18. Lydia Butthole Kollins,
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19. shantay, you stay.
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20. Kori Scott King, sashay away.
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21. Ugh.
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22. Child.
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23. That was so blegh.
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24. It is "Romeo and Juliet"
up in here.
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25. Lydia and Kori,
two star-crossed lovers,
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26. lip synced against each other
to "Kiss Me Deadly,"
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27. and Lydia kissed her deadly.
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28. This is a Shakespearean
tragedy, and I love it.
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29. Oh, my God.
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30. It says good night, kingdom.
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31. - Aw.
- Aw.
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32. I think this is
the least amount
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33. of words Kori has ever said.
- Girl, I know.
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34. I said, that's all?
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35. But it looks
a little incomplete.
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36. I'm going to just—
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37. Aw.
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38. How do you feel right now?
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39. I feel so happy to be here.
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40. I am really sad that Kori
is not going to be here.
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41. I could not even look at Ru
or the judges in the eyes
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42. when she was, like,
announcing who stayed.
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43. Bitch, it was you or her, so.
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44. Yeah.
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45. I'm glad it was me.
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46. But I'm sorry, Kori.
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47. Bye, Kori.
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48. Bye, Kori!
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49. I am trying
my absolute hardest
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50. to not let this get to me,
but there was
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51. something special
about what Kori and I
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52. were doing here together.
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53. It feels great
to have survived,
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54. but there's a deep sadness
running through my body
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55. right now.
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56. Congratulations to Jewels!
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57. Congratulations, Jewelsy!
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58. I got my first win.
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59. I feel like I can finally see
the finish line,
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60. when before it was just
a blurry vision.
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61. And it was a slow burn,
but bitch, Jewels is here.
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62. And she's here to sparkle.
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63. How do you feel, Lexi?
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64. Lexi, are you OK?
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65. Hey, Jewels.
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66. You look amazing.
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67. So I get it.
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68. Please don't take
any of my energy
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69. as anything trying
to take it away from you.
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70. Just you know me and my
inner saboteur, honey.
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71. I am my own biggest enemy,
and I just am
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72. beating myself up.
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73. I feel like the blushing bride
that definitely
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74. was left at the altar.
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75. I won talent show.
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76. Now I have not won
anything else yet though.
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77. I love this look.
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78. For me, this is not
a bottom two look.
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79. I do think there were other
looks that possibly could have
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80. taken my place in the bottom.
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81. - Like who?
- You.
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82. Me?
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83. Girl, what?
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84. Are you that delusional?
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85. I mean, it is
a bra and a skirt, but.
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86. But it's well done.
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87. It is a very tailored
bra and skirt.
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88. And it looks like
you skinned a dead cat.
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89. Oh. Thank you.
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90. She did.
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91. What are the statistics
at this point?
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92. We have three girls with
two wins: Onya, Sam, and I.
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93. And three with one win.
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94. Arrietty, Lexi, and Jewels.
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95. And Lana and Lydia are having
a great time, right?
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96. Baby, all you can do
is laugh.
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97. And take your drag off.
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98. - Period, bitch!
- Right?
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99. Come on!
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100. Let's get out of this drag.
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101. Lydia, I cannot
believe you said I was
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102. going to be in the bottom.
- It's just a little—
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103. Are you crazy?
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104. It's just a little—
it's a little basic for me.
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105. It's a little basic.
I'm sorry I told you.
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106. Bitch, that's why...
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107. I'm just gonna hold
my comment.
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108. For the girls who
haven't won anything yet...
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109. I hate when
they compare wins.
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110. It makes me feel left out.
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111. I've been nice the entire time.
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112. I've been a sister.
- Yeah.
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113. Don't make me be a brother.
Because I can.
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114. Oh.
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115. The girls are finally
realizing that this competition
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116. is a competition.
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117. It is now time
to show what you got.
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118. And if you're not
gonna show it...
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119. You can join your friends.
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120. The winner
of "RuPaul's Drag Race"
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121. receives a one-year supply
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122. of Anastasia Beverly Hills
cosmetics
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123. and a gag-worthy grand prize
of $200,000,
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124. courtesy of TodayTix,
the theater ticket app.
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125. With extra-special guest judge
Whitney Cummings.
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126. Good morning, kingdom.
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127. - We're back.
- Good morning.
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128. We ready.
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129. Bah, bah, bah, bah!
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130. And goodbye, kingdom.
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131. New week, no Kori
to distract me at this point.
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132. So whatever this
next challenge is,
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133. I need to swing big
and knock it out of the park.
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134. Hello, hello, hello.
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135. No way!
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136. - How are you all doing?
- Good.
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137. Pretty good, actually.
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138. Good.
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139. Is anyone going to ask me
how I'm doing?
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140. How are you doing?
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141. How are you, Michelle?
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142. Well, to be honest, I'm sad.
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143. And I think I know why.
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144. Oh. Why?
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145. Tell us.
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146. I'm missing
a major player that
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147. left too early this season.
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148. Oh, God.
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149. Is someone coming back?
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150. For the first time
in "Drag Race" herstory,
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151. we're bringing back
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152. the Badonka Dunk tank.
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153. Oh!
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154. I thought I'd finished
with that bitch.
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155. And now she's back?
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156. I suggest that you take off
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157. anything that you don't want
to get wet
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158. and meet me on the main stage
in five minutes.
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159. And go!
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160. Yeah!
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161. Oh, my!
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162. Oh, my gosh.
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163. Queens!
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164. Give a warm "Drag Race" welcome
to "Entertainment Weekly"
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165. Senior Writer Joey Nolfi.
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166. Hi, Joey!
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167. Hello, queens.
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168. For today's revenge—
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169. oop!
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170. I mean Mini Challenge—
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171. Oh, God.
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172. You'll each take a seat
atop the Badonka Dunk tank.
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173. Joey and I will ask you
a series of questions.
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174. If you answer correctly,
you'll stay dry.
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175. If not, you get dunked.
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176. Oh, man.
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177. That's crazy.
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178. Oh, lord.
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179. Do you know how much
product I have to use to get
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180. my hair to look like this?
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181. Bitch, I do not want to
wet my hair right now.
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182. Lydia Butthole Kollins,
you are first.
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183. Hi, Bruno.
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184. Oh, thanks.
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185. Ah!
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186. Ooh!
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187. The hand on the back?
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188. Girl, Kori's going to be mad.
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189. Oh, I bet.
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190. OK, first question.
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191. Lydia, what's your
favorite color?
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192. Blue.
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193. Wrong. It's red.
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194. I'm going to piss
in this tank
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195. and make these
bitches drink it.
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196. Jewels, what's your
favorite body part?
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197. Penis.
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198. Wrong.
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199. It's your uvula.
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200. Look at her.
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201. Who is your favorite
"Drag Race" judge?
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202. Michelle Visage.
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203. Brown nose.
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204. Ooh!
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205. Everyone's getting dunked
left and right.
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206. Oh, no!
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207. Dropping like flies.
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208. Arrietty.
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209. Hello.
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210. This may be
the sweetest revenge of all.
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211. No, show me mercy.
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212. Are you a top?
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213. Ooh.
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214. Or are you a bottom?
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215. I'm a bottom.
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216. Ooh, wait.
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217. Hold on.
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218. She's definitely
a bottom bitch.
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219. Yeah.
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220. She's a bottom!
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221. Queens!
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222. The winner of today's
mini challenge is—
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223. Hey.
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224. Where did Joey go?
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225. Michelle!
I'm up here.
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226. Help!
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227. Oh, my God.
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228. This one's for you, Hormona.
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229. Yeah!
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230. Go to EW.com/DragRace
to hear my exclusive
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231. interview with Joey Nolfi.
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232. Oh, yes.
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233. Queens.
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234. The love language
of drag is shade.
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235. Yes.
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236. That is right.
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237. So for this week's
Maxi Challenge,
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238. we're throwing the first ever
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239. Villains Roast.
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240. I drop punch lines
on these hoes all day.
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241. I feel like—
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242. God, I keep saying this,
but I feel like
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243. this is going to be my week.
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244. You will pay
a comedy tribute to three
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245. of the shadiest Queens
in Drag Race history,
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246. Mistress Isabelle Brooks...
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247. Kandy Muse...
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248. - Lordy.
- Absolutely.
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249. And Plane Jane.
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250. Oh, my God!
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251. Later today, you'll
workshop your material with me
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252. and the irrepressible
Whitney Cummings.
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253. Shit.
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254. Yes!
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255. Jewels Sparkles.
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256. You won last week's
Maxi Challenge,
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257. so you get to assign
the order of the roast.
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258. I love you, Jewels.
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259. It's on, bitch.
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260. Ooh.
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261. Racers, start your engines.
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262. And may the best
drag queen win.
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263. Let's get this roast
a-cookin'.
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264. Yes.
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265. Jewels has
the "honor" of giving us
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266. the order for the roast.
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267. And she could try and please
everyone or be strategic.
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268. So as a pageant bitch,
I'm hoping she's strategic
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269. and sets these bitches up.
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270. I would like to hear from
each of you what place you want
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271. and why.
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272. We'll start with Lexi.
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273. I would like
last place, please.
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274. I would like to wrap
this shit up.
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275. I want to win.
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276. Lydia, what place
would you like?
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277. Well—
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278. Or is there anyone
you don't want to go
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279. behind or go in front of?
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280. Like, what's the tea with that?
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281. I mean, I don't want
to go behind, like,
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282. someone like Suzie.
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283. OK.
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284. Sam?
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285. I would like to go
earlier in the roast.
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286. Not after Suzie,
or Onya, or Lexi.
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287. But I am comfortable going
after Arrietty, Lana, or Lydia.
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288. Lana, where do
you want to go?
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289. - Probably, like, third.
- OK.
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290. Suzie?
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291. I would like to go
first or last.
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292. OK. Arrietty?
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293. I mean, roasts
aren't my thing.
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294. So I think I would like
the middle, so fourth.
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295. Onya?
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296. I would like to go
second or third.
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297. OK.
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298. While the judges deliberate,
y'all can sit here
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299. and, you know,
do your thing, and I will—
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300. - Oh, wow.
- I will go deliberate.
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301. - That's how we're doing this?
- Yes, absolutely.
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302. I'm definitely considering
all acting challenges,
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303. comedy challenges,
and the reading challenge.
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304. Hmm.
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305. I'm not a big roaster,
so I want
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306. to look as perfect as I can.
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307. Ooh, this is tough.
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308. Lana and Lydia
don't have a win.
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309. I don't want to put them
in a tough position
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310. because that would
just be mean.
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311. OK, I think I've
come up with my plan.
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312. I think this is a very fair,
diplomatic bitch.
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313. I feel like
the Robin Hood of drag.
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314. Going first
and opening the show is Onya.
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315. Going second is Arrietty,
third is myself,
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316. fourth is Lana, fifth is Sam,
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317. sixth is Lydia,
seventh is Suzie,
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318. and eighth is Lexi.
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319. You fucking bitch.
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320. You set me up with Suzie?
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321. What the fuck is
happening right now?
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322. Lexi wanted
to close the show.
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323. So—
- You shaded me.
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324. Out of everybody you shaded,
why did you shade me?
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325. Well, I didn't want to go—
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326. She gave you what you wanted.
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327. You wanted last.
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328. She put Suzie
before me, girl.
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329. You got what
you wanted, girl.
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330. I did give
the harder placements
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331. to the girls that
have wins already
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332. and to the girls who've been
doing well in this competition.
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333. You've got a win now.
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334. OK?
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335. And I picked the order, bitch.
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336. So obviously, I'm going to put
myself in the place I want.
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337. I'm feeling a little
stabbed in the back.
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338. I think Jewels wanted
to go after me because
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339. she knew I was going to do bad.
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340. It's shady as hell to me.
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341. You put yourself
in a sweet spot.
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342. Bitch, Arrietty is pissed
and Lexi is equally pissed.
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343. But this is not "RuPaul's
Best Friend Race," OK?
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344. I would never do
what Jewels did.
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345. Like, ever.
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346. But if she wants
to play the game,
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347. then I can play the game too.
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348. I'm so excited.
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349. Yes.
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350. Coming up...
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351. How do you think
you are perceived?
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352. I could run into the issue
of being a little too smart.
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353. Ain't none of her jokes
ever went over my head.
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354. Hi.
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355. Hello.
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356. Come in. Hi, hi, hi.
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357. It's time to meet up
with our comedy coaches,
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358. Michelle Visage
and Whitney Cummings.
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359. Queens, say hello
to Whitney Cummings.
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360. Hi, Whitney.
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361. Thank you for having me.
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362. She is a comedy superstar.
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363. She has roasted,
she has toasted.
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364. They're all like, I thought
Joan Rivers was dead.
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365. Whitney and I
are here to help you
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366. work through your approach
to this roast.
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367. When it comes to roasting,
what you're giving someone
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368. when you roast them
is the gift of them being
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369. able to laugh at themselves.
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370. That's how we play
defense against it
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371. coming off kind of mean.
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372. Do you want to stop
yawning, or?
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373. I'm sorry.
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374. So sorry.
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375. Did the Adderall wear off?
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376. It's not because
I'm bored or tired.
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377. I'm just a yawny girl.
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378. I'm sorry, Whitney.
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379. Let's start with Onya.
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380. Hey!
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381. Do you want to try
out one of your jokes?
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382. Sure.
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383. Today, we have the opportunity
to roast Juvéderm,
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384. Sculptra, and Insulin.
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385. Great.
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386. Sorry, sorry.
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387. I mean, Kandy Muse, Plane Jane,
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388. and Mistress Isabelle Brooks.
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389. Onya's been killing
every comedy challenge.
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390. This is "Drag Race," innit?
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391. Not Make-A-Wish.
- Oh.
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392. Great, great.
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393. Love it.
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394. And Jewels knew if someone
strong goes before me,
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395. I'm going to look
even worse so that she
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396. can take the light after me.
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397. So it's not a good feeling.
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398. Now Arrietty, when I
announced the roast challenge,
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399. you look like the fear of
God had entered your body.
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400. Are you scared?
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401. Very much.
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402. Because I don't really,
like, write jokes.
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403. I like to come off cute.
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404. - Yeah.
- Uh-huh.
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405. But then when it comes
out of my mouth is not cute.
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406. - You're a secret cunt.
- Exactly.
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407. There we go.
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408. Exactly.
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409. Since you have
that bitchy streak—
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410. Yeah.
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411. - Call upon that.
- Yes.
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412. OK.
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413. I have a lot of work to do.
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414. And for someone
that doesn't really do this,
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415. not enough time.
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416. Jewels Sparkles.
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417. Hi!
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418. What do you think
people think about you?
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419. I think they think
I'm a dumb whore.
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420. Oh.
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421. And so I'm going to lean
into that a little bit.
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422. OK.
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423. So one of the jokes that
I had come up with that's like
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424. me misreading something
is Mistress,
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425. you know,
your face is so stamped.
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426. You literally—you
really let your creativity
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427. run wild with your makeup.
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428. And that's surprising, because
it looks like you hate to run.
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429. I think that's funny.
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430. Great, great, great.
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431. I would get there quicker,
but it's still—
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432. - Yes.
- Funny.
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433. OK.
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434. So it's more about
the delivery.
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435. Yes.
And then just, like, knowing it
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436. so that you can be
your whimsical self.
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437. There's a whole
art to roasting.
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438. So I'm going to have to stay up
all night to memorize this
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439. so that I don't fuck up.
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440. - So, Lana...
- Yes.
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441. You're meeting Whitney
for the first time.
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442. Tell her who you are.
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443. I love to showcase looks and
showcase my silly personality.
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444. I got zero silly
from Lana Ja'Rae.
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445. I got beautiful model,
but goofy, silly?
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446. No.
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447. Damn.
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448. What is a laugh?
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449. It's a surprise.
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450. So even better that you have
been this stoic statue
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451. and then you come out
and you're silly.
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452. And we're like...
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453. Give us that drama
of, like, who's this person?
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454. I'm ready to see
what you got.
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455. I said,
Mistress calls herself
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456. the heavyweight champion.
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457. And I have to agree,
because the only thing
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458. heavier than her weight is
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459. my wait for
a Maxi Challenge win.
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460. Here's what I will say.
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461. If you're too self-deprecating,
then sometimes
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462. they're going to take
their cues from you.
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463. This is a roast.
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464. You better roast, or your ass
could be going home.
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465. A lot of people tell me
I'm funny in the Werk Room,
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466. but not when it comes
to, like, being on stage
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467. and having to be funny.
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468. So I hope that
I'm able to rework this
Copy !req
469. because one more
slip up and they will
Copy !req
470. send my ass out of the door.
Copy !req
471. "Sham Shtar."
Copy !req
472. Ding!
Copy !req
473. You want to tell us a little?
Copy !req
474. Now Miss Ts Madison.
Copy !req
475. We all know you've
dabbled in sex work.
Copy !req
476. Bitch, I think you've
fucked more rich
Copy !req
477. white men than cryptocurrency.
Copy !req
478. Excellent.
Copy !req
479. Thank you.
Copy !req
480. Lydia Butthole Kollins.
Copy !req
481. How do you think
you are perceived?
Copy !req
482. I think I'm sort of, like—
Copy !req
483. Tired?
Copy !req
484. I'm perceived kind of
outwardly sweet.
Copy !req
485. I'm considered,
like, a kumbaya girl.
Copy !req
486. But I do have all these
horrible, evil, disgusting
Copy !req
487. thoughts in my brain.
Copy !req
488. Your drag name is so funny.
Copy !req
489. I just don't buy that
that's your drag name
Copy !req
490. and you're not going to
knock this out of the park.
Copy !req
491. Right.
Copy !req
492. I have a very cynical
and rotted sense of humor.
Copy !req
493. And I'm hopefully going
to tap into that inner evil
Copy !req
494. that I have and not
hold back one bit.
Copy !req
495. Suzie Toot,
meet Whitney Cummings.
Copy !req
496. Hi, Whitney.
Copy !req
497. Hello.
Copy !req
498. We've seen you do
some comedy.
Copy !req
499. Mm-hmm.
Copy !req
500. And you won "RDR Live."
Copy !req
501. So does that put some
additional pressure on you?
Copy !req
502. I think it does.
Copy !req
503. I'm a little bit cerebral.
Copy !req
504. I think I could
run into the issue
Copy !req
505. of being a little too smart.
Copy !req
506. That is some bullshit.
Copy !req
507. Don't let her fool you.
The bitch is funny.
Copy !req
508. OK.
Copy !req
509. Ain't none of her jokes
ever went over my head.
Copy !req
510. Uh-huh.
Copy !req
511. So it ain't nothing
cerebral about it.
Copy !req
512. Oop, OK.
Copy !req
513. She's trying to, like,
bring the expectations down
Copy !req
514. so she can exceed it.
Copy !req
515. She's like, I'm cerebral.
Copy !req
516. I'm afraid of going
over people's heads.
Copy !req
517. Bitch, please.
Copy !req
518. Onya blew my cover.
Copy !req
519. Yeah, I'm gonna do well.
Copy !req
520. Yeah, I'm good at this.
Copy !req
521. God forbid, huh?
Copy !req
522. And last but certainly
not least, Lexi Love.
Copy !req
523. Let's hear what you got.
Copy !req
524. Kandy Muse is such a cunt
that she uses
Copy !req
525. Summer's Eve as mouthwash.
Copy !req
526. Kandy Muse, you're such
a yeasty cunt that—
Copy !req
527. She could make dough rise.
Copy !req
528. Lexi, you are on
your way, my darling.
Copy !req
529. Thank you.
Copy !req
530. The more pressure I have,
I mean, the worse
Copy !req
531. I feel like I'm going to do.
Copy !req
532. And I was like, well, since
Jewels wants to play the game,
Copy !req
533. let me play too.
Copy !req
534. So I'm taking
a few of her jokes.
Copy !req
535. How fun.
Copy !req
536. OK, ladies.
Copy !req
537. We are going to wrap this up.
Copy !req
538. Thank you, Michelle.
Copy !req
539. Thank you, Whitney.
Copy !req
540. Miss Jewels...
Copy !req
541. Karma's a fucking bitch.
Copy !req
542. Coming up...
Copy !req
543. My intention was not
to get in your head.
Copy !req
544. Girl.
Copy !req
545. Of course y'all don't
feel a type of way
Copy !req
546. because she didn't
do it to you.
Copy !req
547. Let a bitch be mad.
Copy !req
548. You have wrecked
these bitches.
Copy !req
549. Let's get this roast
a-cookin'.
Copy !req
550. Who's hungry?
Copy !req
551. Ready to roast a bitch.
Copy !req
552. It's time for the roast, sweetie.
Copy !req
553. And I'm feeling very confident,
especially based on the fact
Copy !req
554. that all of these
bitches are upset,
Copy !req
555. and pressed, and bothered
about the lineup.
Copy !req
556. I'm like, OK.
Copy !req
557. I'm coming in with
positive energy.
Copy !req
558. I'm going to be funny.
Copy !req
559. Are you excited?
Copy !req
560. I'm so excited.
Copy !req
561. I feel like with
scripted comedy,
Copy !req
562. it has not been an
easy road for me.
Copy !req
563. I beg your pardon?
Copy !req
564. Buy me a drink first.
Copy !req
565. So I'm excited to hopefully
redeem myself.
Copy !req
566. Yes, yes.
Copy !req
567. I'm excited to let out
my secret evil side.
Copy !req
568. - Yes.
- Mwa-hah-hah-hah-hah.
Copy !req
569. Let it out.
Copy !req
570. I was up all night
working on my roast.
Copy !req
571. So I think that my
delusional confidence
Copy !req
572. today is lent to the fact
that I am so tired.
Copy !req
573. The tension is thick, bitch.
Copy !req
574. The tension is tensioning.
Copy !req
575. Mm-hmm.
Copy !req
576. I do not want to be
next to Jewels right now.
Copy !req
577. I don't want to argue
with her before the roast,
Copy !req
578. because I don't want to be
in my head even more.
Copy !req
579. You know I wasn't trying
to set you up, right?
Copy !req
580. Hmm?
Copy !req
581. I wasn't trying
to set you up.
Copy !req
582. You know that, right?
Copy !req
583. I don't believe that.
Copy !req
584. You putting yourself after me?
Copy !req
585. Now you're literally hoping
that I don't do good
Copy !req
586. so that you can do better.
Copy !req
587. So that is something
that's irritating me.
Copy !req
588. Don't.
Copy !req
589. OK.
Copy !req
590. Are you moving over
to the cool girls?
Copy !req
591. I'm moving
to the not-hateful people.
Copy !req
592. I'm sorry, Arrietty.
Copy !req
593. I mean, we are
in a competition.
Copy !req
594. So I'm here to play.
Copy !req
595. Yeah.
Copy !req
596. And at this point,
I don't give a fuck
Copy !req
597. about anyone's feelings.
Copy !req
598. OK, work.
Copy !req
599. And it honestly gave me
a fire in my ass to do better.
Copy !req
600. OK, cool.
Copy !req
601. At the end of the day,
all you can do
Copy !req
602. is stab your friend
in the back.
Copy !req
603. Wait, did she leave Jewels...
Copy !req
604. Uh-huh.
Copy !req
605. The girls are moving
and switching, honey.
Copy !req
606. The girls are
moving and switching.
Copy !req
607. Me and Arrietty
are completely
Copy !req
608. done fooling with Jewels.
Copy !req
609. Y'all are mad?
Copy !req
610. About to play—
Copy !req
611. "Mad" ain't even the word.
Copy !req
612. That's what you
asked for, though.
Copy !req
613. She knows how much
you have thrown me off
Copy !req
614. or gotten in my head.
Copy !req
615. From the get go,
Suzie is a front runner
Copy !req
616. and I was a front runner.
Copy !req
617. Why is she
out-front-running me?
Copy !req
618. This was a setup.
Copy !req
619. Honestly, if you were
in her position,
Copy !req
620. would you not set someone up
that was competition?
Copy !req
621. The fact that she messed up
because I'm not the one.
Copy !req
622. It should have been
whoever's been performing best,
Copy !req
623. which would be Suzie.
Copy !req
624. But she did set me up in that
Copy !req
625. she didn't give me
what I wanted.
Copy !req
626. You wanted to be last—
Copy !req
627. And she gave you—
Copy !req
628. I feel like she honored—
- Oh, no.
Copy !req
629. It was like a trade-off.
Copy !req
630. She punished me
for asking for last.
Copy !req
631. - No.
- By putting me after—
Copy !req
632. I think she was
like—she wanted to—
Copy !req
633. All right, girl.
Copy !req
634. I disagree.
Copy !req
635. Here's the real tea.
Copy !req
636. Where you are placed
in the roast
Copy !req
637. does not matter that much.
Copy !req
638. How you personally are affected
by where you place in the roast
Copy !req
639. matters a lot.
Copy !req
640. It was a stunt
to try and throw me off.
Copy !req
641. I'm not going to be
thrown off this time.
Copy !req
642. You're saying, well,
that's not gonna work.
Copy !req
643. I'm not gonna get thrown off.
Copy !req
644. It sounds to me like
you are currently thrown off.
Copy !req
645. Yeah.
Copy !req
646. Well, we shall see
when I do my set.
Copy !req
647. OK, diva.
Copy !req
648. I can't control
your inner saboteur.
Copy !req
649. And I can't be
the one to blame.
Copy !req
650. You could flip the script
in your mind
Copy !req
651. and just say
this is an opportunity
Copy !req
652. to outshine one of the biggest
players in the game.
Copy !req
653. You're gonna do a great job
Copy !req
654. and you can't let that
get in your head.
Copy !req
655. It should be happy, fun.
Copy !req
656. It's the roast day.
Copy !req
657. It's really silly, Lexi.
Copy !req
658. You have to admit
that it's silly.
Copy !req
659. $200,000 is not silly.
Copy !req
660. Sam is trying
to look out for me,
Copy !req
661. but the roast is over here
to me somewhere.
Copy !req
662. And over here,
where I really am,
Copy !req
663. is just Suzie Toot and Jewels.
Copy !req
664. And—and I'm just like,
oh, my fucking God.
Copy !req
665. Like, I cannot escape
this headspace.
Copy !req
666. Ah, fuck.
Copy !req
667. - How are you, baby?
- I'm OK.
Copy !req
668. - Are you sure?
- Everyone left me.
Copy !req
669. No one wants to sit next to me.
- I'm sorry.
Copy !req
670. It's OK.
I think it's a little dramatic.
Copy !req
671. I actually consulted in her,
and I said, hey,
Copy !req
672. I don't feel really good
about this.
Copy !req
673. And then she put herself
after me.
Copy !req
674. So that's kind of fucked up
in my—in my eyes, you know?
Copy !req
675. That's the whole thing.
Copy !req
676. I consulted her as well,
like, weeks ago,
Copy !req
677. about feeling uncomfortable
about Suzie,
Copy !req
678. and it was a stunt.
Copy !req
679. I could care less about
how Lexi feels right now
Copy !req
680. because I gave that bitch
what she asked for.
Copy !req
681. But I care about what Arrietty
feels because she's my friend,
Copy !req
682. and I hate that I made her
feel this way
Copy !req
683. when that was not
the intention.
Copy !req
684. I just want to apologize
to you, Arrietty,
Copy !req
685. because, like, you're right.
Copy !req
686. I did put myself after you
because I'm not
Copy !req
687. very confident in a roast.
Copy !req
688. So I didn't want to go behind
one of the stronger players.
Copy !req
689. So thank you.
Copy !req
690. As a friend, I would never
do that to you.
Copy !req
691. So thank you for actually
saying that out loud.
Copy !req
692. I would have done it to someone
else that wasn't my sister.
Copy !req
693. Damn, so everybody in here
ain't your sister?
Copy !req
694. Well, yes,
they're all my sisters.
Copy !req
695. But I feel like me and her
had a connection.
Copy !req
696. We do have a connection.
Copy !req
697. So that's why
I'm more hurt by that.
Copy !req
698. I didn't mean
to make you, like,
Copy !req
699. get in your head about this.
Copy !req
700. Well, you did.
Copy !req
701. I am still a little hurt.
Copy !req
702. I mean, I'm fucking human.
Copy !req
703. Girl, but you could cut
the tension in the room
Copy !req
704. with a butter knife, honey.
- Uh-huh.
Copy !req
705. You know, I hope that
when we get to the stage
Copy !req
706. that our energy shifts,
Copy !req
707. because I want this
to be a great roast.
Copy !req
708. Shut up.
Copy !req
709. Let a bitch be mad.
Copy !req
710. Of course, y'all don't
feel a type of way—
Copy !req
711. Well, listen. OK.
Copy !req
712. Because she
didn't do it to you.
Copy !req
713. That's why you don't feel
some type of way.
Copy !req
714. OK, yes.
Copy !req
715. That is not good, bitch.
Copy !req
716. - That is not funny.
- What?
Copy !req
717. What's funny?
Copy !req
718. - Why are you laughing?
- Because.
Copy !req
719. It seems shady.
Copy !req
720. There is no reason why
Jewels should be
Copy !req
721. having you, like,
spiraling, low key.
Copy !req
722. All I'm gonna say
is that my intention
Copy !req
723. was not to get in your head.
Copy !req
724. - Girl.
- That was all I—
Copy !req
725. I'm gonna say.
Copy !req
726. You can feel however
you want to feel—
Copy !req
727. - Jesus fucking Christ.
- Are valid.
Copy !req
728. I was not trying
to get in your head.
Copy !req
729. That was not my intention.
Copy !req
730. Girl.
Copy !req
731. And I do think—
Copy !req
732. It's so exhausting.
Copy !req
733. OK.
Copy !req
734. All right.
Copy !req
735. I will leave it at that.
Copy !req
736. That's all I can say.
Copy !req
737. Leave it at that.
Copy !req
738. I will leave it at that.
Copy !req
739. All of a sudden,
I am the fucking—
Copy !req
740. the villain of the season, girl.
Copy !req
741. They're gonna roast me
next season, bitch.
Copy !req
742. At the end of the day—
Copy !req
743. Shut your ass up, bitch.
Copy !req
744. Miss Paul!
Copy !req
745. Welcome to the main stage
of "RuPaul's Drag Race."
Copy !req
746. She's your favorite villain's
favorite villain,
Copy !req
747. Michelle Visage.
Copy !req
748. I blame it on the edit.
Copy !req
749. They all do, darling.
Copy !req
750. They all do.
Copy !req
751. The tantalizing Ts Madison.
Copy !req
752. Now, Maddie, would you
rather roast or be roasted?
Copy !req
753. Ru, you know I go both ways.
Copy !req
754. See, I'd rather be
spit roasted.
Copy !req
755. And the fabulous
Whitney Cummings.
Copy !req
756. Thank you for helping
our Queens.
Copy !req
757. And thank you for all
the free makeup I just stole.
Copy !req
758. They call me
Anastasia Woodland Hills.
Copy !req
759. This week,
we challenged our queens
Copy !req
760. to dish out the laughs at
our first-ever Villains Roast.
Copy !req
761. Racers, start your engines.
Copy !req
762. And may the best
drag queen win!
Copy !req
763. Coming up...
Copy !req
764. The cast of
"STD The Rusical."
Copy !req
765. Miss Is—Isabelle Brooks.
Copy !req
766. Ooh, I said that wrong.
Copy !req
767. Ahh!
Copy !req
768. Yikes.
Copy !req
769. It's the Villains Roast.
Copy !req
770. Honoring Mistress
Isabelle Brooks.
Copy !req
771. Drag delusion, girl.
Copy !req
772. Plane Jane.
Copy !req
773. You look a fool—
doo-doo clown mess.
Copy !req
774. And Kandy Muse.
Copy !req
775. If you don't have
star quality,
Copy !req
776. get the fuck out of here.
Copy !req
777. Let's welcome our first
roaster, Onya Nurve.
Copy !req
778. Oh, hello, hello, hello.
Copy !req
779. Welcome to RuPaul's
Villains Roast!
Copy !req
780. I am so honored to be
the first queen in "Drag Race"
Copy !req
781. herstory to be roasting
our very own Plane Jane,
Copy !req
782. Kandy Muse,
and Mistress Isabelle Brooks.
Copy !req
783. You may also recognize them as
the cast of "STD The Rusical."
Copy !req
784. Now, Kandy,
I'ma start with you.
Copy !req
785. I would consider you
Copy !req
786. the Tasmanian devil
of your season,
Copy !req
787. so I'm gonna speak this
in a language
Copy !req
788. only me and you can understand.
Copy !req
789. Period!
Copy !req
790. Now, me and Kandy gonna
translate that for y'all.
Copy !req
791. Say it with me, Kandy.
Copy !req
792. If you don't have star quality,
get the fuck out of here!
Copy !req
793. Jewels, that means you, baby.
Copy !req
794. Ooh.
Copy !req
795. Yes, yes, yes.
Copy !req
796. Now, Plane Jane, I am so sorry
that you didn't get a chance
Copy !req
797. to experience this roast moment
Copy !req
798. with your dear sister,
Kori King.
Copy !req
799. But I will have you know that
Copy !req
800. she is just as
beautifully untalented,
Copy !req
801. rotted, and dumb as you are.
Copy !req
802. And I see exactly
where she get it from.
Copy !req
803. And Mistress Isabelle Brooks,
Copy !req
804. thank you so much
for being here.
Copy !req
805. I'm sure you had
nothing else going on.
Copy !req
806. OK, OK.
Copy !req
807. This next entertainer has
the comedic timing
Copy !req
808. of a cancer diagnosis.
Copy !req
809. Wow.
Copy !req
810. Put those hands together
Copy !req
811. and get ready for Arrietty!
Copy !req
812. To be honest, I am shaking
in my boots right now.
Copy !req
813. I am so scared
of roasting people,
Copy !req
814. but not as much as
Plane Jane is scared
Copy !req
815. of emotional intelligence.
Copy !req
816. Or Miss Is—
Copy !req
817. Isabelle Brooks.
Copy !req
818. Ooh, I said that wrong.
Copy !req
819. Ahh!
Copy !req
820. Sound it out, baby.
Copy !req
821. Kandy Muse is afraid
of tongue twisters.
Copy !req
822. Or Miss Isabelle Brooks...
Copy !req
823. Is scared of
elevator weight limits.
Copy !req
824. Yeah, there we go.
Copy !req
825. There we go.
Copy !req
826. Yikes.
Copy !req
827. Oh, my God.
Copy !req
828. Um...
Copy !req
829. It's hard to watch.
Copy !req
830. She's trying to giggle
her way through it.
Copy !req
831. But it's going down.
Copy !req
832. I take it back.
I take it back.
Copy !req
833. I'm not gonna make
a fat joke about Mistress,
Copy !req
834. because Mistress is
already a fat joke.
Copy !req
835. Oh, my God,
she stole my joke.
Copy !req
836. Oh, my God.
Copy !req
837. She stole my jokes.
Copy !req
838. If you hate Kandy Muse,
you are—
Copy !req
839. or probably are racist.
Copy !req
840. And if you like Kandy Muse,
you like bad drag.
Copy !req
841. Plane Jane,
I relate to you the most.
Copy !req
842. The only difference between
you and I is in my childhood,
Copy !req
843. I played outside
with kids and friends.
Copy !req
844. You grew up alone in the dark,
sucking on batteries.
Copy !req
845. Did you not?
Copy !req
846. You clocked it, sister.
Copy !req
847. I kind of just want
to run up there
Copy !req
848. and put her out of her misery.
Copy !req
849. It's just like
you're watching a starving dog
Copy !req
850. and you want to bring it
some food.
Copy !req
851. But you're like,
mm, maybe we should
Copy !req
852. just shoot it in the head.
Copy !req
853. Arrietty's set is just sad.
Copy !req
854. And in conclusion...
Copy !req
855. Yay!
Copy !req
856. And in conclusion,
I honestly don't think
Copy !req
857. you guys are villains.
Copy !req
858. The real villains are the girls
that smile to your face
Copy !req
859. and then stab you in the back,
just like this next diva.
Copy !req
860. So give it up for
the dumbest crackhead I know,
Copy !req
861. Jewels Sparkles.
Copy !req
862. Go get 'em, Jewels.
Copy !req
863. That set was the villain
of the season, baby.
Copy !req
864. Go learn the music, baby.
Copy !req
865. Ooh!
Copy !req
866. Arrietty, that fucking bitch.
Copy !req
867. I'm gagged that
I'm about to go on stage
Copy !req
868. and this bitch just
stole my jokes.
Copy !req
869. Wow.
Copy !req
870. That was very intelligent.
Copy !req
871. OK.
Copy !req
872. Coming up...
Copy !req
873. Plane Jane.
Copy !req
874. Sister, how are you
doing tonight?
Copy !req
875. I'm good—
Copy !req
876. Actually,
I don't give a fuck.
Copy !req
877. And I thought abortion
was illegal in Texas.
Copy !req
878. Not too much.
Copy !req
879. Welcome back
to the Villains Roast.
Copy !req
880. Hi, everyone.
Copy !req
881. My name is Jewels Sparkles,
Copy !req
882. and I am so excited to be here
at the Villains Roast.
Copy !req
883. Right in front of me,
I have three of the biggest
Copy !req
884. villains of all time.
Copy !req
885. And I do mean the biggest
villains of all time, bitch.
Copy !req
886. No, no, no.
That wasn't a fat joke.
Copy !req
887. I am not gonna make
fat jokes today.
Copy !req
888. I think those are just
so tired, and overdone,
Copy !req
889. and just plain mean.
Copy !req
890. So before I roast you three
fat jokes, let me say—
Copy !req
891. Oh.
Copy !req
892. Jewels is stumbling
a little bit because, I mean,
Copy !req
893. I took two of her jokes.
Copy !req
894. Karma is really a bitch, though.
Copy !req
895. "Drag Race" is
a massive platform,
Copy !req
896. but not as massive
as Kandy Muse's back.
Copy !req
897. "Drag Race" is worldwide now,
Copy !req
898. but not as wide
as Kandy Muse's back.
Copy !req
899. Not too much.
Copy !req
900. Well, Plane Jane does remind me
of somebody I know.
Copy !req
901. This person and you
both struggle
Copy !req
902. in foundation shade matching
Copy !req
903. and is weirdly into
Russian hookers.
Copy !req
904. You are
the Donald Trump of drag.
Copy !req
905. Well, at least you do have
the biggest boobs in drag
Copy !req
906. next to Mistress, out of drag.
Copy !req
907. Speaking of Mistress, I get it.
Copy !req
908. The camera adds 10 pounds.
Copy !req
909. But girl, you did walk in
with the first 300.
Copy !req
910. - Oop.
- Oh.
Copy !req
911. Ooh.
Copy !req
912. Well, that was my roast.
Copy !req
913. The next queen coming onto
the stage is gorgeous.
Copy !req
914. And when it comes to comedy,
she's gorgeous.
Copy !req
915. Please welcome Lana Ja'Rae!
Copy !req
916. Wow, Jewels.
Copy !req
917. I could have
said it better myself.
Copy !req
918. Gouda evening, everyone.
Copy !req
919. My name is Lana Ja'Rae.
Copy !req
920. Some of you may know me
as a model,
Copy !req
921. a nice pair of legs,
or as the judges now know me,
Copy !req
922. a disappointment.
Copy !req
923. Mistress is known for
being in a lot of eras.
Copy !req
924. You know, she's been
in her congenial era,
Copy !req
925. her top four era,
but for her doctor's sake,
Copy !req
926. let's all pray
she's in her fitness era.
Copy !req
927. Now Plane Jane.
Copy !req
928. Sister, how are you
doing tonight?
Copy !req
929. I'm good—
Copy !req
930. Actually,
I don't give a fuck.
Copy !req
931. Plane Jane is so white,
she's not racist,
Copy !req
932. because she has a Black friend,
Kori King.
Copy !req
933. Plane Jane, honestly, I don't
have that much material on you,
Copy !req
934. because some of these jokes
really just white themselves.
Copy !req
935. Now, Kandy Muse.
Copy !req
936. Her "Drag Race" legacy will be
remembered for so many,
Copy !req
937. many year.
Copy !req
938. Kandy muse is so dumb, period.
Copy !req
939. Yes, Lana!
Copy !req
940. You better tell those jokes,
Lana!
Copy !req
941. Oh, my sister is killing it.
Copy !req
942. Kandy is known for
sitting alone in the VIP,
Copy !req
943. but I actually have a fun fact.
Copy !req
944. She wasn't sitting alone
in the VIP—
Copy !req
945. she was saving 10 seats
for Ts Madison's ass.
Copy !req
946. Now this next queen,
she owns the stage,
Copy !req
947. much like her family owned
my ancestors.
Copy !req
948. Oh, my God.
Copy !req
949. Make some noise for
the one and only Sam Star!
Copy !req
950. Hello, everyone.
Copy !req
951. Please give it up one more time
Copy !req
952. for my long-time family friend,
Copy !req
953. Miss Lana Ja'Rae.
Copy !req
954. Miss Plane Jane.
Copy !req
955. Plane did introduce herself
to the world
Copy !req
956. with her iconic burger finger.
Copy !req
957. And her drag sister, Kori King,
introduced herself to the world
Copy !req
958. with her butthole finger.
Copy !req
959. We have the fabulous
Kandy Muse.
Copy !req
960. Kandy Muse is so ugly,
Copy !req
961. she don't get
asked out on dates.
Copy !req
962. She gets asked out on dares.
Copy !req
963. Why you laughing?
Copy !req
964. And in closing,
to my Southern sister,
Copy !req
965. Mistress,
all I have to say to you is,
Copy !req
966. bless your heart... disease.
Copy !req
967. One more fat joke,
and I'm gonna lose it!
Copy !req
968. Thank you all so much.
Copy !req
969. Give it up for
Lydia Butthole Kollins!
Copy !req
970. Thank you, Sam.
Copy !req
971. And thank you, Ru,
for bringing us these things.
Copy !req
972. First I want to say hello
to the panel, though.
Copy !req
973. Ru, hi.
Copy !req
974. Now that Kori's gone,
I am going to need
Copy !req
975. another bald Black man
to fill that void.
Copy !req
976. And you do like seeing me
in the bottom anyway, so...
Copy !req
977. Also, Whitney Cummings is here.
Copy !req
978. Hello.
- Hi.
Copy !req
979. Whitney, I am so sorry
Copy !req
980. that I yawned yesterday
during our table read.
Copy !req
981. The truth is, I wasn't tired.
Copy !req
982. You're just really
fucking boring.
Copy !req
983. Oh, my—
Copy !req
984. I'm just going to get to our
main event, the villains.
Copy !req
985. A couple of these divas
know a thing or two
Copy !req
986. about roasting and shredding.
Copy !req
987. Like a pot roast,
shredded chicken, roast beef.
Copy !req
988. Mistress,
I'm honestly surprised
Copy !req
989. you could be on "Drag Race."
Copy !req
990. Bitch, you're not
racing anyone.
Copy !req
991. Oh, boy, Miss Butthole.
Copy !req
992. Did you just bleach it?
Copy !req
993. Look, it's so pretty and funny.
Copy !req
994. Mistress, it is an honor
Copy !req
995. to be here with you.
Copy !req
996. I'm a really, really big fan...
Copy !req
997. is what Mistress would say
Copy !req
998. if she was dressed
like an oscillating fan.
Copy !req
999. Moving on, Jenny from the blob.
Copy !req
1000. Kandy Muse.
Copy !req
1001. Jenny from the blob.
Copy !req
1002. Kandy, you were actually
raised as a moron.
Copy !req
1003. Oh, no.
Sorry, I read that wrong.
Copy !req
1004. As a Mormon.
Copy !req
1005. I heard you left
the Mormon church, though,
Copy !req
1006. because you refused to compete
with six other women for food.
Copy !req
1007. Plane Jane.
Copy !req
1008. Thank you for taking time
out of your busy schedule
Copy !req
1009. jacking it to Amanda Tori
Meating's elimination
Copy !req
1010. to be here with us today.
Copy !req
1011. I've learned a lot
about Boston drag
Copy !req
1012. as I've grown very close
to Kori King, your sis.
Copy !req
1013. And I actually did bring
a little piece of her with me.
Copy !req
1014. To this day, her jizz
is still in my stomach.
Copy !req
1015. - Oh, God.
- Oh, my God!
Copy !req
1016. Oh, my God!
- Oh, my God!
Copy !req
1017. Now help me welcome
our next queen,
Copy !req
1018. a reincarnated Edith Piaf
Copy !req
1019. trapped in
a 24-year-old twink's body,
Copy !req
1020. Suzie Toot.
Copy !req
1021. I was fully expecting
Copy !req
1022. to lift the energy after Lydia,
Copy !req
1023. and I am in a completely
different situation.
Copy !req
1024. Let's get on with this roast.
Copy !req
1025. Mistress is the former mother
of Sugar and Spice.
Copy !req
1026. And I thought abortion was
illegal in Texas.
Copy !req
1027. This would also be
the only context in which
Copy !req
1028. Mistress would cut Sugar
out of her life.
Copy !req
1029. Kandy Muse fancies herself
a television host,
Copy !req
1030. but the only thing she's hosted
consistently is parasites.
Copy !req
1031. Now, it's unfair to say
that Kandy is just
Copy !req
1032. riddled with STDs,
because she's also riddled
Copy !req
1033. with a variety pack
of mental illnesses.
Copy !req
1034. Plane, your sister Kori did
sashay away last week.
Copy !req
1035. But don't worry.
Copy !req
1036. She carried on your legacy.
Copy !req
1037. She had a great ass,
she was hateful,
Copy !req
1038. and she left
no other impression.
Copy !req
1039. Damn.
Copy !req
1040. Now, I am not gonna
stand up here
Copy !req
1041. and call you old, RuPaul,
Copy !req
1042. because that would just be
beating a dead horse,
Copy !req
1043. which, funny enough,
is Raven's job description.
Copy !req
1044. That was good, bitch.
Copy !req
1045. That was good, bitch.
Copy !req
1046. And that is my time.
Copy !req
1047. Great job, Suzie.
Copy !req
1048. Now please welcome
to the stage
Copy !req
1049. your final entertainer,
Copy !req
1050. a dumb, ugly slut
with no friends,
Copy !req
1051. Lexi Love!
Copy !req
1052. Jesus.
Copy !req
1053. Damn.
Copy !req
1054. When Suzie says,
"You have no friends,"
Copy !req
1055. I'm thinking, oh, fuck.
Copy !req
1056. Did I—did I turn everybody
away from me?
Copy !req
1057. Every word in my brain left.
Copy !req
1058. I—
Copy !req
1059. ahh!
Copy !req
1060. No friends, no family,
Copy !req
1061. but I'm gonna fuck this up, honey.
Copy !req
1062. Whoo!
Copy !req
1063. Thank you, Suzie Toot!
Copy !req
1064. You might be known after this
Copy !req
1065. as the Jinkx Monsoon
for Dummies.
Copy !req
1066. On to our three deplorables
of the evening.
Copy !req
1067. The only thing more terrifying
than these three individuals
Copy !req
1068. is you, RuPaul Bunyan.
Copy !req
1069. Damn.
Copy !req
1070. Yikes.
Copy !req
1071. Kandy Muse has
such a rotted cunt mouth,
Copy !req
1072. Donald Trump tried
to grab her by it.
Copy !req
1073. - Ah.
- Rah.
Copy !req
1074. Allegedly, of course.
Copy !req
1075. - Yeah.
- Allegedly.
Copy !req
1076. Plane. Plane Jane.
Copy !req
1077. Plane is actually
very attractive.
Copy !req
1078. She looks like Freddie Prinze
Jr. outside of drag,
Copy !req
1079. if Freddie Prinze Jr. smoked
crystal methamphetamines.
Copy !req
1080. - Oh.
- And I would know, honey.
Copy !req
1081. I was an avid
frequent flyer for years.
Copy !req
1082. The only thing meaner
than Plane Jane
Copy !req
1083. is Kandy Muse's underbite.
Copy !req
1084. Hey!
Copy !req
1085. Let's talk about
Mistress Isabella.
Copy !req
1086. Isabelle, babe.
Copy !req
1087. Isabelle.
Copy !req
1088. Sorry, I love to add letters in
Copy !req
1089. like you like to add carbs.
Copy !req
1090. Oh—oh.
Copy !req
1091. I do want to thank everybody
for joining us here tonight.
Copy !req
1092. This has been a complete
and total waste of my time,
Copy !req
1093. and I'm starting
to smell sulfur.
Copy !req
1094. So I'll see you ladies in hell.
Copy !req
1095. Good night.
Copy !req
1096. And now let's hear
from our villains.
Copy !req
1097. Now me and the dolls
just have some quick words
Copy !req
1098. for the girls.
Copy !req
1099. Cunt, cunt, cunt, cunt.
Copy !req
1100. You're going home next.
Copy !req
1101. This was the most
excruciating meet and greet
Copy !req
1102. that I've ever been a part of.
Copy !req
1103. You girls truly did
the impossible.
Copy !req
1104. Lydia, you made me
hate buttholes.
Copy !req
1105. Suzie, you made me hate drag.
Copy !req
1106. Y'all know drag family
means a lot to me.
Copy !req
1107. To my two nieces here today,
Copy !req
1108. Miss Lana Ja'Rae,
Copy !req
1109. I'm glad to see
you're carrying on
Copy !req
1110. Luxx's fourth placement.
Copy !req
1111. And to Arrietty,
at least you've done
Copy !req
1112. better than the water girl.
Copy !req
1113. So, with that being said,
let the music play.
Copy !req
1114. Coming up...
Copy !req
1115. Your performance was
just amazing.
Copy !req
1116. The minute you fell
even just a little bit,
Copy !req
1117. it took you down.
Copy !req
1118. Category is,
Who Wears Short Shorts?
Copy !req
1119. Up first, Onya Nurve.
Copy !req
1120. Whoo!
Copy !req
1121. Girl, she got a wedgie.
Copy !req
1122. Imagine a big old
pair of shorts
Copy !req
1123. and it can go all the way
up to your titties
Copy !req
1124. to give you the most
ultimate wedgie, baby.
Copy !req
1125. But make it fashion.
Copy !req
1126. The zipper comes down and you
can see my cha-chas, honey.
Copy !req
1127. She puts the "ass"
in "acid wash."
Copy !req
1128. Arrietty.
Copy !req
1129. Ooh.
Copy !req
1130. Heavy is the tuck
that wears the crown.
Copy !req
1131. Have y'all ever wondered
what a elven royal
Copy !req
1132. would wear to play football?
Copy !req
1133. Well, we don't actually
play the game.
Copy !req
1134. We ain't getting dirty.
Copy !req
1135. Looking like this?
Copy !req
1136. Miss Mama, no ma'am.
Copy !req
1137. This is what the first gay
Pope will look like.
Copy !req
1138. "Jewelsh Shparkles."
Copy !req
1139. Jewels Sparkles.
Copy !req
1140. - What they do?
- "Jewels Sparkles."
Copy !req
1141. "Jers Sparkers."
Copy !req
1142. Marie Antoinette.
Copy !req
1143. I've got bows in my hair,
bows on my shorts.
Copy !req
1144. I've got grommets everywhere.
Copy !req
1145. We've got everything that
it takes to be Jewels.
Copy !req
1146. I feel very, very gorgeous.
Copy !req
1147. Pantaloons from
Petticoat Junction.
Copy !req
1148. Petticoat Junction.
Copy !req
1149. Lana Ja'Rae.
Copy !req
1150. - Oh, shit.
- OK.
Copy !req
1151. Come on, Naomi.
Copy !req
1152. Don't throw the Birkin bag.
Copy !req
1153. I am channeling
Naomi Campbell,
Copy !req
1154. Dsquared, 2003.
Copy !req
1155. I am running down the runway
giving bad bitch energy.
Copy !req
1156. I feel so beautiful
and I'm so honored
Copy !req
1157. I get to pay homage to someone
so inspirational to my drag.
Copy !req
1158. Is that a MAGA hat? Oh.
Copy !req
1159. - Make America Drag Again.
- Yeah.
Copy !req
1160. Nobody can wear a red hat
anymore, you know?
Copy !req
1161. - I know.
- I know.
Copy !req
1162. "Sham Shtar."
Copy !req
1163. This is Taylor Swift
and Travis Kelce.
Copy !req
1164. - In one.
- Yeah.
Copy !req
1165. My short shorts,
they are high cut
Copy !req
1166. and adorned with stars.
Copy !req
1167. I always was secretly
jealous of the football team
Copy !req
1168. because they were
so cool and popular.
Copy !req
1169. So this is a tribute
to all of the sexy
Copy !req
1170. football players in the world.
Copy !req
1171. And if you're single,
Copy !req
1172. call me—ding!
Copy !req
1173. Anal beads.
Copy !req
1174. Don't leave home without them!
Copy !req
1175. Lydia Butthole Kollins.
Copy !req
1176. Now this is a gutsy look.
Copy !req
1177. It is. It is.
Copy !req
1178. I am a very tragic tale
this week.
Copy !req
1179. It's a chemical peel
gone wrong.
Copy !req
1180. My skin is falling off.
Copy !req
1181. But luckily, my skin has
stayed just around my cooter
Copy !req
1182. to cover it perfectly.
Copy !req
1183. The skin shorts are made
out of a tulle fabric,
Copy !req
1184. and on the back of them
is a cute
Copy !req
1185. little sparkling butthole.
Copy !req
1186. Come to the party.
Copy !req
1187. Come inside my butthole.
Copy !req
1188. That might be too much.
Copy !req
1189. I did not give her permission
to use my before picture.
Copy !req
1190. Suzie Toot.
Copy !req
1191. You've heard of
"The Merchant of Venice"?
Copy !req
1192. Yes.
Copy !req
1193. Well, this is
"The Merchant of Penis."
Copy !req
1194. Oh, wow!
Copy !req
1195. I'm giving you full
Elizabethan puffy shorts.
Copy !req
1196. And baby, I whipped
that cape off to reveal
Copy !req
1197. my fruity little butt.
Copy !req
1198. - Oh.
- OK.
Copy !req
1199. It is historical.
Copy !req
1200. It's elevated.
Copy !req
1201. It's a cerebral kind of look.
Copy !req
1202. Now appearing in "A Midsummer
Night's Wet Dream."
Copy !req
1203. Lexi Love.
Copy !req
1204. - What kind of love?
- Lexi Love.
Copy !req
1205. Whoo! OK.
Copy !req
1206. My look is a love letter
to my village,
Copy !req
1207. my mom, and a couple
of her girlfriends
Copy !req
1208. and my drag family.
Copy !req
1209. Everybody spent hours stoning
every pair of these shorts,
Copy !req
1210. and I feel wrapped in love.
Copy !req
1211. If you stay shreddy,
you ain't got to get shreddy.
Copy !req
1212. Coming up...
Copy !req
1213. Tonight's look is
my favorite look.
Copy !req
1214. You are absolutely stunning.
Copy !req
1215. This is, like, I got this
at the mall at Wet Seal.
Copy !req
1216. That's not even open anymore.
Copy !req
1217. Welcome, queens.
Copy !req
1218. I've made some decisions.
Copy !req
1219. When I call your name,
Copy !req
1220. please step forward.
Copy !req
1221. Onya Nurve.
Copy !req
1222. Suzie Toot.
Copy !req
1223. Ladies, you are safe.
Copy !req
1224. Thank you.
Copy !req
1225. You may leave the stage.
Copy !req
1226. Queens.
Copy !req
1227. You represent the tops
and bottoms of the week.
Copy !req
1228. Now it's time for
the judges' critiques.
Copy !req
1229. First up, Arrietty.
Copy !req
1230. Arrietty, you seemed unsure,
but you went for it.
Copy !req
1231. And then the minute you fell,
even just a little bit—
Copy !req
1232. Ooh, I said that wrong.
Copy !req
1233. It took you down.
Copy !req
1234. I just want to remind you
that you did
Copy !req
1235. about as well as you said
you were going to do.
Copy !req
1236. So I would just challenge you
to anticipate winning
Copy !req
1237. and see what happens
in every part of your life.
Copy !req
1238. Tonight's look is
my favorite look.
Copy !req
1239. When they said,
"Who Wears Short Shorts?"
Copy !req
1240. I was like, hey, shorty!
Copy !req
1241. Can you not move
your face right now?
Copy !req
1242. Is that what's happening?
- No, I know.
Copy !req
1243. I'm trying not to smile.
Copy !req
1244. It's, like, glued to my face.
Copy !req
1245. I'm sorry I have a bitch face.
So—
Copy !req
1246. I love that you're subtitling
your face right now.
Copy !req
1247. Shut up!
Copy !req
1248. Up next,
"Jewelsh Shparklesh."
Copy !req
1249. Hi!
Copy !req
1250. Started out really strong.
Copy !req
1251. You got up to the podium,
Copy !req
1252. and you said,
that was intelligent.
Copy !req
1253. So that was
actually really funny
Copy !req
1254. and my hopes were very high.
Copy !req
1255. When you, kind of like
Arrietty, started not hitting—
Copy !req
1256. Let me say...
Copy !req
1257. It threw you off.
Copy !req
1258. However, the difference is,
you were pushing through it.
Copy !req
1259. You weren't gonna stop.
Copy !req
1260. You were just doing
bad joke after bad joke.
Copy !req
1261. Damn.
Copy !req
1262. You are absolutely stunning.
Copy !req
1263. I love the big poof.
Copy !req
1264. Your superpower, I think,
is your sweetness.
Copy !req
1265. And the roasting thing
is a skill
Copy !req
1266. I really think
you should work on because
Copy !req
1267. you can get away with murder.
Copy !req
1268. You could be
the Caitlyn Jenner of drag.
Copy !req
1269. Wait!
Copy !req
1270. - Wait.
- Fuck.
Copy !req
1271. Up next, Lana Ja'Rae.
Copy !req
1272. Hi.
Copy !req
1273. White!
Copy !req
1274. Some of these jokes really
just white themselves.
Copy !req
1275. Honey, those white jokes
Copy !req
1276. really, really,
really got it for me.
Copy !req
1277. When it's white, it's white.
Copy !req
1278. Congratulations.
Copy !req
1279. I hope you're so
proud of yourself.
Copy !req
1280. I am so proud of you.
Copy !req
1281. I get Britney Spears's dad.
Copy !req
1282. I want to just lock you
in a house
Copy !req
1283. and have you all to myself.
Copy !req
1284. Well—well, yes.
Copy !req
1285. Did Naomi wear this
in the Dsquared show?
Copy !req
1286. Yes, this was Naomi Campbell
with Dsquared 2003.
Copy !req
1287. Yeah.
Copy !req
1288. But for here, like,
it's different.
Copy !req
1289. This is, like, I got this
at the mall at Wet Seal.
Copy !req
1290. That's not even open anymore.
Copy !req
1291. That's the meanest thing
I've heard today.
Copy !req
1292. There's not enough Lana
in this outfit.
Copy !req
1293. But you proved that
in the roast tonight.
Copy !req
1294. I'm good—
Copy !req
1295. Actually,
I don't give a fuck.
Copy !req
1296. I really got
a sense of who you are,
Copy !req
1297. and that was so refreshing.
Copy !req
1298. Up next, "Sham Shtar."
Copy !req
1299. You were a Southern belle.
Copy !req
1300. You came in, you stuck
the knife in very slow.
Copy !req
1301. You turned it around, honey.
Copy !req
1302. And those girls felt
every piece of it, even me.
Copy !req
1303. Good!
Copy !req
1304. And it's hard
to stick something in me
Copy !req
1305. and I don't feel it, baby.
Copy !req
1306. When you said,
as we say in the South,
Copy !req
1307. bless your sweet little heart.
Copy !req
1308. Disease.
Copy !req
1309. That floored me.
Copy !req
1310. Your performance was
just amazing.
Copy !req
1311. You make it look easy,
which is kind of annoying.
Copy !req
1312. And then tonight,
this is a drag look.
Copy !req
1313. So y'all can do
your favorite looks.
Copy !req
1314. Just bring it here dragged up.
Copy !req
1315. Up next,
Lydia Butthole Kollins.
Copy !req
1316. Hello.
Copy !req
1317. Lydia, your comic timing—
Copy !req
1318. You're not racing anyone.
Copy !req
1319. It was so perfect.
Copy !req
1320. I was like, is that
my biological clock?
Copy !req
1321. Why—What is ticking
so perfectly?
Copy !req
1322. Thank you so much.
Copy !req
1323. What gathered me was
the oscillating fan.
Copy !req
1324. Girl.
Copy !req
1325. That was my favorite one.
Copy !req
1326. I love this look.
Copy !req
1327. It's very you.
Copy !req
1328. It's very ballsy, so to speak.
Copy !req
1329. It doesn't really read
short shorts to me,
Copy !req
1330. I'm not going to lie.
Copy !req
1331. Listen, even this
outfit, I get you.
Copy !req
1332. You're the kids I grew up with
in the East Village.
Copy !req
1333. More importantly, you get it.
Copy !req
1334. All right.
Copy !req
1335. Everybody say Lexi Love.
Copy !req
1336. Yes.
Copy !req
1337. So what I really loved
about your roast was
Copy !req
1338. how you admitted
when the jokes did not—
Copy !req
1339. When they were not landing.
Copy !req
1340. You brought us in,
Copy !req
1341. so we didn't have
that uneasy feeling.
Copy !req
1342. However, they weren't funny.
Copy !req
1343. Got it.
Copy !req
1344. This look tonight, I like it.
Copy !req
1345. It's all shredded and tore up.
Copy !req
1346. Have you worn something where
you drug it on the floor before
Copy !req
1347. while I was here?
Copy !req
1348. Uh, I don't know.
Copy !req
1349. Probably every week,
yeah, yeah.
Copy !req
1350. Every week, Ru said?
Copy !req
1351. Now I know you had
some issues with going last.
Copy !req
1352. I got upset because
I felt like the placement
Copy !req
1353. of Suzie right before me
was going to throw me off.
Copy !req
1354. And Jewels knows
my inner saboteur loves
Copy !req
1355. to tell myself the things that
Copy !req
1356. Suzie Toot is
better than me at.
Copy !req
1357. Because let's face it,
I was sucking dick
Copy !req
1358. and smoking meth
while she was studying
Copy !req
1359. and becoming better.
Copy !req
1360. You and Suzie are totally
two different kinds of queens.
Copy !req
1361. Your saboteur is lying to you.
Copy !req
1362. You know who
you remind me of?
Copy !req
1363. Me.
Copy !req
1364. We're the bitches that
don't take our Adderall
Copy !req
1365. because we forgot it
in some guy's car.
Copy !req
1366. I don't have any notes
or critiques for you.
Copy !req
1367. I do have something to say
to your inner critic.
Copy !req
1368. And that is, fuck you.
Copy !req
1369. Let this be the last time
that your inner saboteur
Copy !req
1370. gets to speak.
Copy !req
1371. Thank you.
Copy !req
1372. Thank you, queens.
Copy !req
1373. I think we've heard enough.
Copy !req
1374. While you untuck backstage,
Copy !req
1375. the judges and I
will deliberate.
Copy !req
1376. All right.
Copy !req
1377. Now, just between
us squirrel friends,
Copy !req
1378. what do you think?
Copy !req
1379. Let's start with Arrietty.
Copy !req
1380. Her looks are amazing.
Copy !req
1381. But when it comes down
to the challenge, honey,
Copy !req
1382. Arrietty was her own
worst enemy.
Copy !req
1383. She's very concerned
with how she looks
Copy !req
1384. and how other people see her.
Copy !req
1385. And honey, if you're doing
a roast, you have to throw
Copy !req
1386. that stuff out the window.
Copy !req
1387. Yes.
Copy !req
1388. Jewels Sparkles.
Copy !req
1389. Listen.
Jewels' jokes didn't land.
Copy !req
1390. Honey, there were people
that caught more STDs
Copy !req
1391. than they caught her jokes.
Copy !req
1392. But Jewels looked
so pretty tonight.
Copy !req
1393. Yes, Marie Antoinette, I am
absolutely fucking sick of.
Copy !req
1394. Stop!
Copy !req
1395. But she looked so pretty.
Copy !req
1396. Lana Ja'Rae.
Copy !req
1397. I cannot believe
how funny Lana Ja'Rae was
Copy !req
1398. tonight in that roast.
Copy !req
1399. Period.
Copy !req
1400. I think she was like, listen.
Copy !req
1401. What have I got to lose?
Copy !req
1402. I too,
enjoyed her roast, honey.
Copy !req
1403. I could have cut me a piece
of that and had it twice.
Copy !req
1404. Mm, fix me a plate.
Copy !req
1405. But her outfit tonight?
Copy !req
1406. I didn't want a plate
of what she had on.
Copy !req
1407. The top looked very cheap.
Copy !req
1408. I think I saw the children
who made it's sweat
Copy !req
1409. sort of on the—
Copy !req
1410. Dripped on the top?
Copy !req
1411. Sam Star.
Copy !req
1412. She needed that one critique
a couple weeks ago,
Copy !req
1413. and now she has hit
the gas pedal.
Copy !req
1414. Tonight Sam Star got
up to the podium.
Copy !req
1415. It was as if she's been
hosting for years.
Copy !req
1416. She has this
Tracy Flick energy
Copy !req
1417. that is normally
a little repellent.
Copy !req
1418. Yeah.
Copy !req
1419. It's exciting
to watch someone
Copy !req
1420. want something so bad.
Copy !req
1421. Let's talk about
Lydia Butthole Kollins.
Copy !req
1422. As far as the jokes go,
those were probably
Copy !req
1423. my favorite of the night.
Copy !req
1424. Her jizz is
still in my stomach.
Copy !req
1425. - Oh, God.
- They were cutting.
Copy !req
1426. They were roasty.
Copy !req
1427. I like my roast
the way I like my men.
Copy !req
1428. How's that?
Copy !req
1429. Dark!
Copy !req
1430. Maybe it's 'cause
I'm a comedian.
Copy !req
1431. I enjoyed how playful
the outfit was.
Copy !req
1432. I enjoyed the sparkly
butthole in the back.
Copy !req
1433. Love Butthole for more reasons.
Copy !req
1434. Let's talk about Lexi Love.
Copy !req
1435. In the challenge,
I wanted her
Copy !req
1436. to let her saboteur be
what makes her win.
Copy !req
1437. Because when you are a person
who struggled with addiction,
Copy !req
1438. there's somebody that looks
like a piece of your addiction
Copy !req
1439. sitting right next to you.
Copy !req
1440. She just has got to do
to her inner saboteur
Copy !req
1441. whatever she did
to all those jeans.
Copy !req
1442. - Uh-huh.
- Yes.
Copy !req
1443. My saboteur is always there.
Copy !req
1444. In fact,
I've made friends with it.
Copy !req
1445. I go, hey, girl. What's up?
Copy !req
1446. Oh, you still there?
Copy !req
1447. But I'm gonna do
this thing over here.
Copy !req
1448. Once she learns that trick,
Copy !req
1449. I think there's no stopping
Miss Lexi Love.
Copy !req
1450. I think we call that
multiple personality disorder.
Copy !req
1451. Yes, yes.
Copy !req
1452. Silence!
Copy !req
1453. I've made my decision.
Copy !req
1454. Bring back my girls.
Copy !req
1455. Welcome back, queens.
Copy !req
1456. I've made some decisions.
Copy !req
1457. Arrietty.
Copy !req
1458. You were royal on the runway,
but your roast was a flush.
Copy !req
1459. I'm sorry, my dear,
but you are up for elimination.
Copy !req
1460. Lana Ja'Rae.
Copy !req
1461. Tonight,
your roast was so wrong,
Copy !req
1462. it was white.
Copy !req
1463. Sam Star.
Copy !req
1464. Tonight, you served
Southern-fried shade.
Copy !req
1465. And honey, we sopped it up.
Copy !req
1466. With a biscuit.
Copy !req
1467. Lydia Butthole Kollins.
Copy !req
1468. Tonight, you tore
that roast a new one.
Copy !req
1469. Butthole.
Copy !req
1470. Condragulations.
Copy !req
1471. You are the winner
of this week's challenge.
Copy !req
1472. Oh, my God, Lydia!
Copy !req
1473. Come on, Lyddie!
Copy !req
1474. Oh, my God.
Copy !req
1475. You've won
a cash tip of $5,000.
Copy !req
1476. Thank you so much.
Copy !req
1477. I don't even know what to say.
Copy !req
1478. It feels extra sweet
to win the roast,
Copy !req
1479. especially because
it's a comedy challenge.
Copy !req
1480. I did not expect to win
one of those.
Copy !req
1481. Lana, Sam, you are both safe.
Copy !req
1482. The three of you may join
the other girls.
Copy !req
1483. - Thank you so much.
- Thank you.
Copy !req
1484. I'm just feeling really
on top of the world.
Copy !req
1485. And I'm funny.
Copy !req
1486. Oh, my God, bitch.
Copy !req
1487. Jewels Sparkles.
Copy !req
1488. You soared on the runway.
Copy !req
1489. But in the roast,
your jokes did not land.
Copy !req
1490. Lexi Love.
Copy !req
1491. You know where you're going.
Copy !req
1492. But in the roast,
you lost direction.
Copy !req
1493. Lexi Love...
Copy !req
1494. you are safe.
Copy !req
1495. You may join the other girls.
Copy !req
1496. That means Jewels Sparkles,
I'm sorry, my dear,
Copy !req
1497. but you are up for elimination.
Copy !req
1498. I can't believe I'm in
this position right now.
Copy !req
1499. I'm not gonna let this
send me home.
Copy !req
1500. I have to fight.
Copy !req
1501. Arrietty, you might've
stolen my jokes,
Copy !req
1502. but you are not stealing
my spot in this competition.
Copy !req
1503. Two queens stand before me.
Copy !req
1504. Ladies, this is your
last chance to impress me
Copy !req
1505. and save yourself
from elimination.
Copy !req
1506. The time has come...
Copy !req
1507. For you to lip sync...
Copy !req
1508. For your life.
Copy !req
1509. This is my second time
lip syncing,
Copy !req
1510. and it feels good and bad.
Copy !req
1511. Good, because, I mean,
she just did all this shit,
Copy !req
1512. so I'm like,
I want to battle her.
Copy !req
1513. And then bad because
I do care about her.
Copy !req
1514. Good luck,
Copy !req
1515. and don't fuck it up.
Copy !req
1516. OK!
Copy !req
1517. Oh, shit!
Copy !req
1518. Arrietty, you are using
that bustdown wig
Copy !req
1519. to its fullest capabilities.
Copy !req
1520. Inches!
Copy !req
1521. And you better wave them all
over every inch of this stage
Copy !req
1522. if you want to stay.
Copy !req
1523. Jewels is floating across
the stage and giving puss.
Copy !req
1524. This is a fight.
Copy !req
1525. Come on, bitches!
Copy !req
1526. Yes!
Copy !req
1527. Yeah!
Copy !req
1528. Yes!
Copy !req
1529. - Goddamn!
- Oh!
Copy !req
1530. Way to go, bitches!
Copy !req
1531. Yes, baby!
Copy !req
1532. Queens.
Copy !req
1533. I've made my decision.
Copy !req
1534. Jewels Sparkles...
Copy !req
1535. shantay, you stay.
Copy !req
1536. Thank you so much.
Copy !req
1537. You may join the other girls.
Copy !req
1538. I love you so much.
Copy !req
1539. I love you.
Copy !req
1540. Y'all, everybody get ready
for Arrietty.
Copy !req
1541. Now sashay away.
Copy !req
1542. Love you.
Copy !req
1543. Right, right, right.
Copy !req
1544. Soak it in. Soak it in.
Copy !req
1545. Well, it looks like
the runway category
Copy !req
1546. just dropped immensely.
Copy !req
1547. Oh.
Copy !req
1548. Y'all ugly boogers.
Copy !req
1549. Bye!
Copy !req
1550. This is when
she decides to be funny?
Copy !req
1551. Put that in!
Copy !req
1552. Put that in!
Copy !req
1553. I just lost.
Copy !req
1554. How fun.
Copy !req
1555. I did showcase
a lot of my outfits.
Copy !req
1556. I looked sickening,
which is what I do best.
Copy !req
1557. Totally fucking crazy.
Copy !req
1558. Except for right now.
Copy !req
1559. To the ones I like, kill it.
Copy !req
1560. Knock out the other girls.
Copy !req
1561. Ooh.
Copy !req
1562. That's so cunt.
Copy !req
1563. I guess I'm coming off
a little aggressive.
Copy !req
1564. Which is not the way
I want to end.
Copy !req
1565. With that in mind...
Copy !req
1566. Condragulations, queens.
Copy !req
1567. And remember,
if you can't love yourself,
Copy !req
1568. how in the hell you gonna love
somebody else?
Copy !req
1569. Can I get an "amen" up in here?
Copy !req
1570. Amen!
Copy !req
1571. All right.
Copy !req
1572. Now let the music play.
Copy !req
1573. Next time on
"RuPaul's Drag Race"...
Copy !req
1574. You'll be acting in
"Ross Mathews vs. The Ducks."
Copy !req
1575. And action.
Copy !req
1576. Keep my husband's butt
out of your mouth!
Copy !req
1577. Ah!
Copy !req
1578. Bad body bitch!
Copy !req
1579. I messed that up. Sorry.
Copy !req
1580. Your energy was just
larger than life.
Copy !req
1581. All eyes sort of went to her.
Copy !req
1582. I was like, uh-oh.
Copy !req
1583. Ah!
Copy !req