1. Previously
on RuPaul's Drag Race...
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2. You'll create and brand
your own soft drink.
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3. - Yeah!
- Action.
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4. Is your blood sugar low?
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5. Utica.
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6. I didn't exactly know
what your soda did.
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7. Tina Burner.
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8. - What I'm getting from you...
- Hell, yeah!
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9. .. was a bit of predictability.
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10. - Rosé.
- The commercial is textbook.
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11. And it was funny.
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12. Symone.
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13. It's a branding challenge,
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14. and I can still see your logo.
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15. Con-drag-ulations. You're the
winner of this week's challenge.
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16. Rosé, you are also the winner
of this week's challenge.
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17. Utica, shantay you stay.
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18. Tina, my dear, sashay away.
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19. - Oh, Tina.
- Tina.
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20. My Tina Burn-turn.
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21. Tina just went home.
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22. It's heartbreaking,
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23. because Tina has been
such a great sister
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24. in this competition.
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25. Tina!
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26. She won our hearts.
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27. I fully thought
that I was going home.
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28. When RuPaul called my name,
I was shook.
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29. And I feel really bad about it
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30. because I...
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31. I think Tina deserves
to stay more than I do.
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32. And she's so awesome.
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33. You know, like, it hurt me
to see her go home.
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34. But for me, it feels
really good to lip sync
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35. and, like I had
a lot of fun with Tina there.
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36. What did you guys think?
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37. Utica is so confusing.
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38. She'll full lip sync
for her life,
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39. and come back, like, sobbing,
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40. But then
when you ask her about it,
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41. she's, like, it was such
an honor to lip sync.
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42. I love lip syncing so much.
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43. And you're, like, hmm?
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44. You made a really
interesting choice.
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45. You played a character in that,
and it served you well.
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46. I'm not gonna sit here
and tell you,
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47. oh, girl,
you slayed the lip sync
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48. when I don't think you did.
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49. I thought Tina slayed
that fucking lip sync.
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50. Well, we're gonna miss you.
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51. Love you, Tinta Burnter.
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52. I cannot believe I sent
the great Tina Burner home.
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53. I will say I am tapping
myself on the back.
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54. Tina is so talented
and so established
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55. and mama booted her off
the pedestal. So aah!
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56. I think we might have
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57. a new lip sync assassin
on our hands.
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58. Well, we all fit
on the couches now.
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59. Miss double win.
The two winners.
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60. - Congrats, you guys.
- That's stunning.
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61. Listen, I think we all thought
that you were gonna win this,
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62. and well deserved.
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63. But it gags me
that I won it, too.
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64. Maybe next time
it'll be a triple win.
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65. I wanna win so fucking bad.
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66. Tina's now gone, so Kandy's
the lone competitor
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67. who hasn't had a win.
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68. Like, red flag. Alert. SOS.
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69. Being now the top six,
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70. safe is just
not cutting it anymore.
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71. There is no more safe.
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72. It's like if you're not in
the top, you're in the bottom.
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73. Bitch, that crown
is right there in the middle,
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74. and we're all, like...
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75. So as we're winding down
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76. to the end of this competition,
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77. my strategy is I just wanna
put my best foot forward
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78. and I want to trip everyone
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79. so I can get to the top.
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80. Bring on the crown.
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81. Oh-ho!
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82. RuPaul; The winner
ofRuPaul's Drag Race
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83. receives a one-year supply
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84. of Anastasia Beverly Hills
cosmetics
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85. and a cash prize of $100,000.
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86. With extra-special guest judge
Loni Love.
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87. Yes!
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88. So it is a new day,
and I am so excited.
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89. I just got my fourth win
in this competition.
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90. It feels great.
We're in the home stretch.
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91. But it's also like this is still
RuPaul's Drag Race.
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92. Anything can happen.
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93. - Okay, let's get it going.
- Ooh, girl!
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94. She done already
done had herses.
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95. Good girls finish last.
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96. - Oh?
- So who you gonna be?
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97. Miss Goody Two Shoes
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98. or hell on heels?
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99. I'll meet your ass
at the parking lot.
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100. Oh.
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101. I'm ready.
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102. Hello, hello, hello.
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103. My queens,
for today's mini-challenge,
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104. you need to star
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105. in your own live makeup tutorial
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106. on how to create
the perfect glam selfie.
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107. Yes.
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108. And lucky you
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109. gets to feature
the new Norvina palette
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110. from Anastasia Beverly Hills.
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111. Werk.
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112. Oh, and here's the best part.
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113. You'll be doing it in pairs.
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114. One of you will be the face,
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115. and one of you will be her arms.
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116. - Werk.
- Yes.
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117. Okay, queens, partner up.
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118. - We're together?
- I'd love to.
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119. Okay, you've got 10 minutes
to get into quick drag.
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120. No, wait. 91/2 minutes.
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121. Go!
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122. I could really use Tina
right now,
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123. 'cause I need some beard cover.
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124. Queens, say hello
to the president
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125. of Anastasia Beverly Hills,
Norvina.
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126. Norvina, thank you for supplying
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127. all of this season's
gorgeous cosmetics.
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128. My pleasure.
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129. All right.
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130. Remember, the queen
with the funniest face wins.
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131. Hit it.
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132. Hello to all of my friends,
fans, and followers.
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133. Of course it is me,
your girl Samantha.
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134. We are trying out the Norvina
collection right here.
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135. I want to start
with some loose setting powder.
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136. Okay, we've got a lot of this.
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137. Okay, so we've got
this lovely... uh-huh.
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138. Okay. Mm-hmm. This is great.
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139. So now it looks like
I wanna do a nice tangerine.
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140. And start with this base. Ow.
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141. Wow. Feels good.
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142. And I'm gonna finish that off
with some green. Wow.
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143. Okay, on the other side.
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144. We've got two lipsticks here.
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145. Just add it right in there.
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146. And remember, you can
always overdraw your lips
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147. for a sexy, pouty look.
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148. So I'm just gonna
overdraw over here.
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149. I'm just gonna use this lipstick
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150. to actually... oops, okay.
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151. Why not make the glue colorful?
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152. That is fantastic.
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153. I'm feeling
absolutely stun-alina
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154. with my Norvina.
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155. I think we have our new slogan.
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156. Mmm.
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157. Symone and Olivia Lux.
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158. I'll be showing you
how to go from plain Jane
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159. to the ebony enchantress.
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160. We gonna go right in this eye,
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161. this eye right here.
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162. Whoa. Uh, right... yes!
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163. Then we're gonna go
underneath the eye apparently.
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164. How do you accomplish
the perfect smokey eye?
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165. Well, let me show you right now.
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166. We're gonna start from the chin.
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167. Right on this lovely jawline.
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168. Ru, this is exactly
how we test our makeup
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169. at headquarters.
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170. Really? So no animals,
just drag queens.
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171. - Exactly.
- Pow, baby!
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172. All right, Gottmik and Utica.
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173. Hello, my little
gorgalintresses.
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174. Lately I've seen some really
fucking nasty-ass selfies,
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175. so I'm here to show you
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176. how to beat your face
for the gods
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177. and get the correct selfie.
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178. Already it's hilarious
because Utica's arms
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179. are like that.
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180. And... I'm gonna do it now.
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181. Yes, there we go.
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182. Test out the powder, making sure
it's a real good consist...
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183. Just roll that on.
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184. To finish off this look,
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185. we're gonna grab eyelash glue
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186. to really bring
everything together.
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187. Grab my lips again.
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188. If you glue your lips,
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189. doesn't it look like
I'm a genuine cow?
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190. And pose.
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191. I think it's cute.
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192. Seems like
a normal Gottmik thing.
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193. Norvina, please do the honors.
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194. The winners of
this week's challenge are...
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195. Rosé and Kandy.
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196. You've each won $2,500 worth
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197. of Anastasia Beverly Hills
cosmetics.
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198. - Oh, werk!
- Thank you.
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199. Queens, thank you
for trying my new palette.
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200. Now, Norvina,
as an extra-special surprise,
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201. Kandy and Rosé
are gonna do your makeup.
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202. Oh!
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203. I hear my Uber.
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204. Ladykins, we live in a time
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205. when a simple act of kindness
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206. can go a long, long way.
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207. But there's always room
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208. for a little bit
of well-executed shade.
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209. Am I right?
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210. So for this week's
maxi-challenge,
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211. we're throwing
a Nice Girls Roast.
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212. Yes!
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213. Pig optional.
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214. Oh, my God, oh, my God,
oh, my God.
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215. I don't know anything
about roasts.
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216. I've never been to a roast.
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217. I do not wanna roast,
bottom line.
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218. And the nice girls
you'll be roasting
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219. are three
Miss Congeniality winners.
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220. Joining us live
and in person will be
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221. Heidi N Closet...
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222. America's sweetheart
Nina West...
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223. And the forever fan favorite
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224. and face mask pioneer,
Valentina.
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225. "I'd like
to keep it on, please."
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226. She was right, I was wrong.
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227. There.
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228. Growth, RuPaul, growth.
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229. Thank you, Dr. Fauci.
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230. Oh, and Rosé and Kandy,
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231. since you won
the mini-challenge,
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232. you get to decide the order
that the queens will perform.
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233. - Ooh.
- Ooh.
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234. Racers, start your engines,
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235. and may the best drag queen win.
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236. Lord have mercy, help me!
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237. Child, I'm not funny.
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238. Honey, this is not the gig.
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239. Coming up...
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240. You can be in the bottom
or in the top all you want.
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241. Neither of you are gonna win.
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242. Kandy, let's not focus
on winning
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243. until you can win
something, baby.
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244. Roasting up a storm.
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245. It's getting hot in here, baby.
It's a roast.
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246. Our maxi-challenge is...
♪ Ba ba bum ba ba ba
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247. a fucking roast.
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248. Kandy, should we talk first?
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249. Yeah, let's break off.
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250. Kandy and I
get to pick the order.
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251. That is fucking iconic,
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252. because your placement
in a roast lineup
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253. can make or break you.
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254. So seeing all the girls
that are left, and us two...
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255. Well, we get to decide
where we go, like, down.
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256. The first question is
when do you wanna go?
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257. So often in this competition,
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258. girls have the authority and
they forget about themselves.
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259. No, bitch, me and Kandy
are going for ourselves first.
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260. The coveted spots usually
are the first and the last.
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261. I don't know.
I kinda wanna, like, open.
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262. Why do you wanna open?
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263. I feel like I can
come out really strong,
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264. set the bar really high
with energy
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265. and, you know, be really shady.
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266. I also would love to open
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267. and set the tone,
set the energy.
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268. I don't know. I definitely
do not wanna close.
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269. You don't wanna close.
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270. I'm not witty enough to write
my own jokes on the spot,
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271. so if any bitch says my jokes
throughout the roast,
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272. I'm gonna be like, oop.
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273. That's why if I go first,
I don't gotta worry about that.
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274. I do my job
and keep it stepping.
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275. Like, I know you are really...
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276. Like, just basing it off
of your winning challenge,
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277. you're really good
with the jokes,
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278. and you can hold any placement.
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279. Tea, but, I mean, the last
has a bit more pressure.
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280. I could close. I could close.
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281. Rosé, oh, my God, it's risky.
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282. Take a fucking risk, bitch.
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283. We're at the end.
This is the top six.
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284. Don't fucking play safe.
Girl, go last.
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285. So fuck it, I'm going last.
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286. We should be responsible for
making the night feel good, too.
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287. Like, let's say
I were to open, right,
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288. and Gottmik
were to be in the middle,
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289. and then you were to close,
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290. the energy stays put
throughout the entire night.
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291. I like that idea.
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292. You wanna kind of keep the show
high at the beginning,
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293. high in the middle,
and high at the end.
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294. You know, you don't wanna
have a boring-ass show.
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295. All right, girlies.
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296. So we decided
I'll open the show.
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297. - Symone will be second.
- Okay.
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298. Utica will be third.
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299. Cute.
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300. - Mik will be after Utica.
- Killing it.
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301. Then Olivia,
and Rosé will close out.
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302. - Oh.
- All right.
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303. Y'all was in the corner
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304. and y'all thought
to put y'all selves
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305. in the two most challenging
places in this roast?
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306. All right, bitch.
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307. Hey, listen, if you wanna do it,
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308. you wanna put it on yourself,
hey, have at it, honey,
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309. 'cause it ain't me.
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310. So do it, honey.
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311. We're having ourselves a roast.
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312. Werk, babies.
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313. The L.A. ho's need to represent.
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314. We do.
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315. I do not wanna fucking roast.
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316. I do not wanna roast.
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317. I know. Literally saying that
was my exact thought process.
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318. But here we are,
and now we have to make it work.
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319. I'm a little nervous
about myself.
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320. The only roasts I've seen
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321. are the ones
in my mama's crockpot,
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322. so this is a new experience.
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323. I know there are girls here
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324. who are, like,
just naturally funnier.
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325. I must deliver.
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326. This is definitely gonna be
a challenge for me,
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327. because I definitely think
I have a problem
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328. with being too, like,
sweet with things.
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329. Really? Sweet?
Have you ever been sweet?
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330. I think I'm gonna end up
doing well.
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331. I think I'm gonna do well.
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332. It's not my thing, but who's
to say what's my thing?
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333. Get it!
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334. I'm very confident
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335. that you're gonna do very well
in this challenge.
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336. I think I'm the most worried
about Olivia in this challenge.
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337. She is so delightful,
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338. but you need to be savage
in a roast.
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339. Nina's shoulders so wide...
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340. Oh, that's good!
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341. Okay.
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342. I'm just reciting over
this lovely material.
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343. Oh, I cannot wait, my love.
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344. Baby, give yourself life.
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345. Oh, I need a can of Liv
from Olivia.
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346. You'll be in the bottom.
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347. I was safe.
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348. You would know.
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349. You would also know,
the one that has the most safe.
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350. Most safe? You mean most top?
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351. I mean, you could
be in the bottom
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352. or in the top all you want.
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353. Neither of you are gonna win.
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354. Kandy, let's not focus
on winning
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355. until you can win something,
baby, okay?
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356. Excuse me.
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357. I won two mini-challenges.
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358. Baby, that's the only thing
mini about you, baby, okay?
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359. - Wow.
- You are quick, bitch.
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360. Yeah, she gonna
be quick to exit.
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361. I'm a little bit nervous,
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362. because I've done
a roast before,
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363. and it wasn't so great.
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364. But I love reading
these bitches,
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365. so I'm ready to do this roast,
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366. and I'm ready to finally win
a fucking maxi-challenge, okay?
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367. Coming up...
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368. Nina West's shoulders
are so wide
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369. she makes Tina Burner
look like Valentina.
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370. We have a Miss cunt-geniality
with us here tonight.
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371. Is that too harsh?
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372. - Hi!
- Hey, Kandy girl.
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373. It is time to meet
with the comedy coaches,
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374. Miss Michelle Visage
and Loni Love.
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375. Are you ready to roast?
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376. I'm ready to do something.
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377. Let's do this!
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378. Give it to me.
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379. Aah! Okay.
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380. So for Valentina,
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381. I was gonna say something
along these lines.
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382. Like, well, I think
it's pretty funny
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383. that we're doing a roast
for the Miss Congeniality,
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384. seeing that we have
a Miss cunt-geniality
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385. with us here tonight.
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386. Right.
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387. Is that too harsh?
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388. It's not too harsh.
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389. I just don't know
if the TV land people
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390. are gonna let the word cunt.
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391. Hence "charisma, uniqueness,
nerve, and talent."
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392. Probably not, right?
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393. And you don't wanna be bleeped
your whole thing.
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394. Right, right, right, right.
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395. Also, make sure we hear those.
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396. Make sure we understand
what you're saying.
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397. I'm trying so hard
to enunciate my words,
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398. because sometimes, you know,
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399. my little Bronx accent
comes out, bitch,
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400. and I'm talking so fast
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401. you can't understand
what the fuck I'm saying.
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402. But just slow it down
so we can hear it.
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403. Okay, okay.
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404. - Hi!
- Hey, Gottmik.
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405. - Are you ready to roast?
- No.
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406. It was actually the number one
challenge going into this.
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407. I was like, if they
have me roast, I'm gonna die.
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408. All right. Well, I'm ready
to see what you got.
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409. Okay.
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410. Love.
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411. This is gonna be me onstage,
going through the roast.
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412. I know. Where is it, Gottmik?
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413. So maybe we start...
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414. Start with the honorees.
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415. Yeah, let's start
with the honorees.
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416. I have one that's kind of
Kandy and Valentina,
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417. so I was gonna
kind of go to Kandy,
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418. and be, like, Kandy Muse...
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419. Mm-hmm.
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420. Kandy, girl, you've
lip synced more times
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421. than Valentina has attempted
to block the words "Rent Live"
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422. on social media.
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423. - Okay.
- That's funny.
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424. - That's funny.
- That's hilarious!
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425. Okay. Good to know.
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426. Let's hear what else you have.
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427. So I wanna say something like,
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428. we don't all have
our brand given to us
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429. the day we were born.
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430. Michelle popped out
and the doctor smacked her ass
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431. to see if she was alive,
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432. and the word "whore"
just popped right out.
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433. That's cute.
You got some good stuff.
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434. What we don't wanna hear
is, "um, okay,"
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435. "because what I was gonna say."
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436. - We don't want that.
- No.
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437. Because if you think
it's not funny
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438. and you kind of apologize
when you deliver it,
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439. it won't be funny.
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440. No.
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441. - Olivia Lux!
- What up?
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442. How are you today?
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443. I'm not gonna lie.
I'm a little nervous today.
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444. I think sometimes
I am a little, like, too nice.
Copy !req
445. Yeah. We all know
how nice you are.
Copy !req
446. That's what
we fall in love with,
Copy !req
447. your smile and your curly hair
and your sassy attitude.
Copy !req
448. So I think if you could
surprise the crap out of us
Copy !req
449. with some hard-hitting jokes,
it would be really fab.
Copy !req
450. Okay, let's do it.
Copy !req
451. Nina West wanted to be on
Drag Raceso bad
Copy !req
452. she auditioned 28 times,
Copy !req
453. and there's only been
13 seasons.
Copy !req
454. Okay.
Copy !req
455. Valentina spends over six hours
doing her face,
Copy !req
456. two of which are her looking
at herself in the mirror,
Copy !req
457. singing I Will Always Love You,
Copy !req
458. but still, six hours.
Copy !req
459. All I hear is crickets.
I'm, like...
Copy !req
460. Give me one for Loni.
Copy !req
461. I wanna talk about
your engineering degree.
Copy !req
462. - But is that funny?
- Um...
Copy !req
463. Okay. Tough audience.
Copy !req
464. We know you could do cute,
so we just need more.
Copy !req
465. You can use that cuteness
to, you know, eh, stab 'em.
Copy !req
466. You could, you know, shank 'em.
Copy !req
467. - We need more funny.
- Believe in yourself.
Copy !req
468. After this rehearsal,
I got a lot of work to do.
Copy !req
469. "Molly, you in danger, girl."
Copy !req
470. Very much so.
Copy !req
471. Rosé! So why don't we start
with the honorees?
Copy !req
472. Nina West is here,
which is no surprise,
Copy !req
473. seeing as Nina
could be sitting in Texas
Copy !req
474. while her shoulders
are in Arkansas and Louisiana.
Copy !req
475. Nina West's shoulders
are so wide
Copy !req
476. that she makes Tina Burner
look like Valentina.
Copy !req
477. Heidi's actually
really, really thirsty.
Copy !req
478. My boyfriend
actually at one point
Copy !req
479. had to send her
a cease-and-desist.
Copy !req
480. - Ooh!
- Yeah.
Copy !req
481. It wasn't nearly as complicated
Copy !req
482. as when her makeup brushes
sent her a restraining order.
Copy !req
483. Oh, my goodness.
Copy !req
484. And that's about as far
as I've gotten in my flow.
Copy !req
485. Really good.
Find a way to shorten that.
Copy !req
486. - Sure.
- Because it's so funny.
Copy !req
487. Your punches are so punchy
and good and hard.
Copy !req
488. Yeah, you seem
really prepared, Rosé.
Copy !req
489. I can't wait to see it.
Copy !req
490. Okay, well, thank you so much.
Copy !req
491. It's gonna be a good show.
Copy !req
492. Cheers. After the coaching,
I'm feeling really confident,
Copy !req
493. and it feels great.
Copy !req
494. Look at me. I'm holding
the microphone right now. Damn.
Copy !req
495. - Hey, hey, Symone-yay.
- Hey, y'all.
Copy !req
496. Are you ready to roast,
babydoll?
Copy !req
497. I'm a little nervous to do it,
Copy !req
498. 'cause I've never done
a roast before.
Copy !req
499. - Take it as far as you can.
- Okay.
Copy !req
500. If it's not funny,
we'll tell you.
Copy !req
501. All right,
I'm gonna start with Nina.
Copy !req
502. I'm so happy you could
join us tonight.
Copy !req
503. You know, I know that the bridge
has been a little, you know...
Copy !req
504. Less people been walking
across in these hard times.
Copy !req
505. But now that
you're here with us,
Copy !req
506. I guess it's you're welcome.
Copy !req
507. - Explain that.
- Troll under the bridge.
Copy !req
508. Oh! Okay. Wait, we're gonna
have to explain that,
Copy !req
509. so I would lose that.
Copy !req
510. - Lose that one?
- Yeah.
Copy !req
511. Let's hear what else you got.
Copy !req
512. Thank you, Kandy, for that
marvelous introduction.
Copy !req
513. It's from Hocus Pocus.
It's my favorite movie.
Copy !req
514. Oh, okay. Great.
Copy !req
515. But tell me something, my love.
Copy !req
516. When you were standing alone
in the back of the stage
Copy !req
517. looking at all the girls
who've won a challenge,
Copy !req
518. did it remind you of being
in VIP or alone in VIP?
Copy !req
519. Because it was the, um,
the meme...
Copy !req
520. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Copy !req
521. - I think you're an overthinker.
- Yes.
Copy !req
522. When you're thinking about this,
and it's a meme,
Copy !req
523. and it's a movie,
you don't need that.
Copy !req
524. Always better to go
right for the jugular.
Copy !req
525. Go right to it, yeah.
Copy !req
526. Because it was, like, long.
Copy !req
527. - You just wanna hit 'em.
- Yeah.
Copy !req
528. Be Symone. Use that character
to tell your joke.
Copy !req
529. Okay.
Copy !req
530. - Hey!
- Hey, Utica!
Copy !req
531. Are you excited?
Copy !req
532. - I am excited, yes.
- Okay.
Copy !req
533. I know you're gentle by nature.
Copy !req
534. Do you think you can
roast these beasts?
Copy !req
535. Underneath, I think there is
Copy !req
536. a bubbling evil exterior...
Uh, interior.
Copy !req
537. Good. Fantastic.
Copy !req
538. So, RuPaul,
you have been bonkers
Copy !req
539. over Symone in this competition.
Copy !req
540. You know, I think you both could
make a really good couple.
Copy !req
541. You know, Symone and Pumbaa.
Copy !req
542. Pumbaa? Pumbaa,
you know, like, Lion King.
Copy !req
543. What?
Copy !req
544. It's not a funny joke, Utica.
Copy !req
545. Have you seen Lion King?
Copy !req
546. Yes! I have children, Utica!
Copy !req
547. You sure do look like it.
Copy !req
548. Let's hear what you got
for Nina.
Copy !req
549. All right, Nina West.
Copy !req
550. Oh, I'm sorry. I thought
you could speak whale.
Copy !req
551. You like that, Loni?
Can you speak whale, too?
Copy !req
552. Very mean. Very, very mean.
Copy !req
553. I wouldn't do this.
Copy !req
554. That could be very offensive.
Copy !req
555. Does that trigger you?
Copy !req
556. Does it? Whales? Manatees?
Copy !req
557. Does Dumbo ring a bell to you?
Copy !req
558. No, I'm just kidding.
Copy !req
559. Wow.
Copy !req
560. It's harsh.
Copy !req
561. Even though it's a roast,
it still has to be funny.
Copy !req
562. Just mean doesn't work,
you know what I mean?
Copy !req
563. My taste level
when it comes to humor
Copy !req
564. is I love
when it's just accurate.
Copy !req
565. Like, I love, like,
really good observations
Copy !req
566. and just a little bit
of truth to it.
Copy !req
567. Just think it through
Copy !req
568. of what is funny
and what is mean.
Copy !req
569. Mean never works.
Copy !req
570. Yeah.
Copy !req
571. Okay, Utica, you got
some work to do,
Copy !req
572. so we're gonna release you
to go get to it.
Copy !req
573. - Thank you.
- Good luck, Utica.
Copy !req
574. - Bye squad.
- That's gonna be complicated.
Copy !req
575. Yeah.
Copy !req
576. Eew.
Copy !req
577. - Gross - How'd it go?
Copy !req
578. Utica.
Copy !req
579. I made a Lion Kingjoke,
Copy !req
580. and Michelle was like,
"I don't get it."
Copy !req
581. It was so funny.
Copy !req
582. Michelle was looking
at Loni like,
Copy !req
583. "What the fuck's happening?
What's happening?"
Copy !req
584. But, no, it was
a really good time.
Copy !req
585. Oh, so you feel the same way
Copy !req
586. you felt during Snatch Game
and your commercial?
Copy !req
587. Utica's biggest weakness
right now
Copy !req
588. is that Utica does not agree
Copy !req
589. with anything the judges
have been telling her.
Copy !req
590. She thinks that her art
is just the peak of life.
Copy !req
591. I think I'm gonna do really well
in this challenge.
Copy !req
592. I have some pretty strong jokes,
Copy !req
593. and this is gonna be
authentically me,
Copy !req
594. and I'm ready to make
this roast a blast.
Copy !req
595. Coming up...
Copy !req
596. I can't wait to see it.
Copy !req
597. Baby, this is gonna be
a battle for you.
Copy !req
598. Huh? The pressure's on.
Copy !req
599. The pressure cooker
has been turnt up.
Copy !req
600. Uh-oh. Shots fired.
Copy !req
601. - Whoo-hoo!
- Let's get this roast a-cookin'!
Copy !req
602. Roast day, bitch!
Copy !req
603. We are back in the werkroom,
and it is time to roast, baby.
Copy !req
604. Who's hungry for a roast?
Copy !req
605. I am feeling better
than I did yesterday.
Copy !req
606. However, you can prepare
as much as you want,
Copy !req
607. but when the lights, the camera,
the action come on,
Copy !req
608. it is anyone's game.
Copy !req
609. Yo, and it's gonna go past
really quick,
Copy !req
610. because there's
only fucking six of us.
Copy !req
611. Which could be
a very good thing for us
Copy !req
612. or a very bad thing for us.
Copy !req
613. Baby, it's gonna be
a bad one for you.
Copy !req
614. Huh?
Copy !req
615. Uh-oh, shots fired.
Copy !req
616. The roast is absolutely
not anyone's game.
Copy !req
617. There are stronger roasters
in here than others.
Copy !req
618. I know that the strong points
Copy !req
619. are gonna be Kandy,
Gottmik, and myself.
Copy !req
620. Baby, I'm about to look
like a fucking woman today.
Copy !req
621. I can't wait to see it.
Copy !req
622. Oh, baby, you've seen it
all season long.
Copy !req
623. - Have we?
- Y'all look like drag queens.
Copy !req
624. And you look like a man.
Copy !req
625. I'm ready to wear this hair,
honey.
Copy !req
626. Oh, baby.
Copy !req
627. Come on, lace!
Copy !req
628. - Come on, lace!
- Ooh!
Copy !req
629. If y'all don't roast Olivia
Copy !req
630. about her damn lace
on that damn wig
Copy !req
631. with them ponytails
sticking out of her head,
Copy !req
632. you deserve to go home today.
Copy !req
633. But you still won that week.
Copy !req
634. Bitch.
Copy !req
635. My plan in going
into today's roast
Copy !req
636. is basically to shock the judges
Copy !req
637. even more than a girl that
you expect is gonna do well.
Copy !req
638. I definitely came into it
terrified of the roast.
Copy !req
639. But I definitely feel like
I found my rhythm,
Copy !req
640. and I'm feeling like
I finally got the comedy voice
Copy !req
641. that I've been looking for,
so I'm excited.
Copy !req
642. Werk.
Copy !req
643. - Utica, how are you feeling?
- I think my jokes are fun,
Copy !req
644. and I'm confident that
I'm gonna do well in this.
Copy !req
645. I feel like,
well, if I have fun,
Copy !req
646. like, they're gonna
have fun with me.
Copy !req
647. I don't know about her material
for this roast.
Copy !req
648. I've heard a couple of jokes,
Copy !req
649. she's been a little off lately,
Copy !req
650. so I'm not sure what to expect,
Copy !req
651. and she's still, like,
grinning from ear to ear,
Copy !req
652. can't wait to roast the dolls.
Copy !req
653. I'm hoping that she doesn't
turn it up too hot.
Copy !req
654. Has anyone, like, had a moment
Copy !req
655. where comedy got them through,
like, a hard time?
Copy !req
656. Well, have you?
Copy !req
657. Yeah, in a way.
Copy !req
658. Like, being drag
just brings a lot of joy
Copy !req
659. and fun and comedy into my life,
Copy !req
660. and it's definitely lightened
my self-imposed load,
Copy !req
661. if I would say, on myself.
Copy !req
662. Ooh!
Copy !req
663. Y'all nasty and y'all need help.
Copy !req
664. I definitely think comedy
Copy !req
665. gets me through
a lot of things in life.
Copy !req
666. I think I use humor sometimes
Copy !req
667. as a way of coping with things
that really hurt me,
Copy !req
668. and I think that that's why now
I love making people laugh.
Copy !req
669. It is my greatest joy on this
Earth in this little body to...
Copy !req
670. - Little?
- Thank you.
Copy !req
671. To make people laugh.
Copy !req
672. Nothing makes me feel
more complete
Copy !req
673. than to bring people joy
Copy !req
674. and to hear the tangible
laughter that comes with that.
Copy !req
675. Agreed.
Copy !req
676. Especially as queer folks
and PoC queer folks,
Copy !req
677. it can be a definitely
a difficult time
Copy !req
678. in the outside world,
Copy !req
679. and it's the small moments
at bars
Copy !req
680. that we have with one another,
Copy !req
681. laughing and talking
over a drink and a drag show,
Copy !req
682. that really make our bonds
so special.
Copy !req
683. - Mm-hmm.
- Or sometimes just a drink,
Copy !req
684. because the drag show
fucking sucks.
Copy !req
685. Yeah, we've been
to your shows on Monday.
Copy !req
686. Aah!
Copy !req
687. Oh, she's a comedy queen!
Copy !req
688. We'll see.
Copy !req
689. Not all of us
Copy !req
690. can be a self-proclaimed
comedy queen like Rosé.
Copy !req
691. Baby, the reviews have been in
for years, honey.
Copy !req
692. Years? It sounds like
Copy !req
693. a lot longer
than I've been doing drag.
Copy !req
694. It sure does. Thank you
for reading yourself.
Copy !req
695. The pressure's on.
Copy !req
696. The pressure cooker
has been turnt up,
Copy !req
697. and we just gonna have to see
who's gonna be fully cooked
Copy !req
698. or if it's just fucking
roasted, my love.
Copy !req
699. And what?
Copy !req
700. Welcome to the main stage
of RuPaul's Drag Race.
Copy !req
701. She's sugar and spice
and occasionally nice,
Copy !req
702. Michelle Visage.
Copy !req
703. You know what, Ru?
Thank you for noticing.
Copy !req
704. Thank you.
Copy !req
705. The hilarious Ross Mathews.
Copy !req
706. Ross, do you like being
the butt of the joke?
Copy !req
707. Ooh, that sounds fun.
I'd like to try that.
Copy !req
708. Everybody say Loni Love!
Copy !req
709. Now, Loni, can you take a joke?
Copy !req
710. Only if I can have
that outfit, girlfriend.
Copy !req
711. This week
we challenged our queens
Copy !req
712. to show off their comedy chops
at our Nice Girls Roast.
Copy !req
713. Racers, start your engines,
Copy !req
714. and may the best drag queen win.
Copy !req
715. Coming up...
Copy !req
716. This is the longest on record
Copy !req
717. that Heidi has ever waited
before trying to fuck me.
Copy !req
718. You didn't know them words
to that lip sync.
Copy !req
719. You let that happen.
Copy !req
720. Uh.
Copy !req
721. Welcome to the first-ever
Nice Girls Roast.
Copy !req
722. Please welcome Miss Congeniality
Season 11, Nina West.
Copy !req
723. Hey, that's me!
Copy !req
724. Miss Congeniality
Season 9, Valentina.
Copy !req
725. ¡Escandalosa!
Copy !req
726. Hi.
Copy !req
727. And our reigning
Miss Congeniality,
Copy !req
728. Heidi N Closet.
Copy !req
729. Whoo!
Copy !req
730. Now, what shady thing
Copy !req
731. could you possibly have to say
about these angels?
Copy !req
732. Mm.
Copy !req
733. Let the roast begin.
Copy !req
734. Hey, y'all!
Copy !req
735. Ooh, bitch, don't I look
gorgeous tonight, huh?
Copy !req
736. Y'all, my name is Kandy Muse,
and I ain't a nice girl.
Copy !req
737. I'm a naughty girl, ooh.
Copy !req
738. Oh!
Copy !req
739. Listen up, bitch.
Copy !req
740. Welcome
to the Nice Girls Roast, bitch.
Copy !req
741. Tonight we have
the privilege and honor
Copy !req
742. of roasting our amazing
Miss Congenialities.
Copy !req
743. Ain't no audience tonight.
Copy !req
744. Mm-mmm.
Copy !req
745. Michelle, don't that
kind of remind you
Copy !req
746. of your old concerts
from back in the day?
Copy !req
747. Oh!
Copy !req
748. First up,
the incredible Valentina.
Copy !req
749. Hello.
Copy !req
750. You know, you and my drag mother
Copy !req
751. have so much history together.
Copy !req
752. But she got
one thing correct, baby.
Copy !req
753. You're perfect,
you're beautiful,
Copy !req
754. that performance in Rent Live
was rough, bitch.
Copy !req
755. Your angel needed an angel.
Copy !req
756. Hello, Miss Nina West!
Copy !req
757. Hi!
Copy !req
758. You make my good Judy
Miss Tina Burner
Copy !req
759. look like such a petite woman
Copy !req
760. with those big-ass shoulders
you got, bitch. Whoo!
Copy !req
761. I know that Drag Race
is the Olympics of drag,
Copy !req
762. and, baby, you the stadium.
Copy !req
763. How can I forget our sweetheart,
Miss Heidi N Closet?
Copy !req
764. I don't know what's worse,
your fashion on Season 12...
Copy !req
765. Ooh, no, baby, ain't
nothin' worse than that.
Copy !req
766. All right.
Copy !req
767. Hello, judges!
Copy !req
768. - Hi!
- Hi, Kandy!
Copy !req
769. I don't know what's scarier,
Copy !req
770. waiting for my test results
at the clinic
Copy !req
771. or waiting for a critique
from the judges.
Copy !req
772. I know at least one of them
will come out positive.
Copy !req
773. How could I forget about
Copy !req
774. our amazing special guest
judge Miss Loni Love?
Copy !req
775. Hey, Kandy.
Copy !req
776. How does being
an extra on Soul Plane
Copy !req
777. land you this big-ass gig
on RuPaul's Drag Race?
Copy !req
778. Hey, Ru!
Copy !req
779. Hi!
Copy !req
780. Y'all, RuPaul is so old,
Copy !req
781. Jurassic Park
brought back memories.
Copy !req
782. RuPaul's so old,
I told her to act her own age,
Copy !req
783. bitch, she died.
Copy !req
784. Miss Kandy Muse
from the Haus of Aja.
Copy !req
785. Her little daughter that came
out her...
Copy !req
786. to make fun of me,
Copy !req
787. and the bitch did a good job.
Copy !req
788. And then Latinas
are in the house. Hey!
Copy !req
789. If you enjoyed my set,
thank you so much.
Copy !req
790. If you didn't enjoy it,
Copy !req
791. you're definitely not gonna
enjoy the next bitch after me.
Copy !req
792. She is a fashionista
Copy !req
793. with the voice
of a fucking gargoyle.
Copy !req
794. Give it up for
Miss Symone-Symone-yay!
Copy !req
795. Kandy Muse,
Copy !req
796. thank you for that
marvelous introduction.
Copy !req
797. Now, I do have
a question for you.
Copy !req
798. Last week,
when you were standing
Copy !req
799. in the back of the stage
Copy !req
800. looking at all the girls
Copy !req
801. who've won a challenge
in front of you...
Copy !req
802. Did it remind you
of standing alone in the VIP?
Copy !req
803. Oh, goodness, gracious.
Copy !req
804. Mm, mm, mm, mm.
Copy !req
805. But speaking of losers,
Copy !req
806. we have our esteemed panel
of congenialities here tonight.
Copy !req
807. We have Miss Valentina.
Copy !req
808. We gotta talk about
that controversy.
Copy !req
809. Oh, yes, mm-hmm.
Copy !req
810. You didn't know them words
to that lip sync.
Copy !req
811. No.
Copy !req
812. You let that happen.
Copy !req
813. Uh.
Copy !req
814. Symone is bombing.
Copy !req
815. It's like time stops.
Copy !req
816. Time is stopping right now.
Copy !req
817. Miss Loni Love.
Copy !req
818. Hey, Symone!
Copy !req
819. Hey!
Copy !req
820. Now, you is an author,
an actress, a TV host,
Copy !req
821. and you're a former
electrical engineer.
Copy !req
822. But then you somehow
were so good at it,
Copy !req
823. you engineered your ass
onto this judging panel.
Copy !req
824. Oh, God.
Copy !req
825. - Miss Ross "The Boss" Mathews.
- Hi.
Copy !req
826. The gayest one on this panel.
Copy !req
827. Thank you.
Copy !req
828. And that gets me,
Copy !req
829. because you sitting
next to a man in a wig
Copy !req
830. that's been pulled,
plucked, and prodded...
Copy !req
831. And, no, that's not you,
Miss RuPaul, okay?
Copy !req
832. I'm talking about Michelle.
Copy !req
833. Now on to my girls.
Copy !req
834. Oh-livia. Now, I told you
Copy !req
835. that you remind me of the girls
back home, and that's poor.
Copy !req
836. But...
Copy !req
837. Heidi's here tonight,
Copy !req
838. so you have one thing to know:
Copy !req
839. that you are not
destitute, okay?
Copy !req
840. Oh, my!
Copy !req
841. Symone is gorgeous.
Copy !req
842. I just wish her jokes
were as good as she looks.
Copy !req
843. I can't even spell that.
Copy !req
844. I guess it's time
to bring up our next queen,
Copy !req
845. straight from
the Minnesota Institute
Copy !req
846. for the Criminally Insane,
Copy !req
847. give it up for Utica Queen.
Copy !req
848. Oh, Symone,
I thought I was the one
Copy !req
849. who had the balls
to bomb that hard.
Copy !req
850. Great job, Symone.
Copy !req
851. The judges love you so much
in this competition,
Copy !req
852. especially Ross.
Copy !req
853. You know, Ross and Symone,
Copy !req
854. I think you guys
would make a great couple.
Copy !req
855. Symone and Pumbaa.
Copy !req
856. Hakuna matata!
Copy !req
857. Ross, you know I love you.
Copy !req
858. You are so gay that you
don't shit on the dick,
Copy !req
859. you skittles on the dick.
Copy !req
860. Ooh.
Copy !req
861. You're so gay
they should, uh, uh...
Copy !req
862. They should make the whole... ooh.
Copy !req
863. They should take
Celebrity Big Brother
Copy !req
864. and make it Celebrity
Big Brother with Benefits.
Copy !req
865. This is hilarious, and not
hilarious because it's funny,
Copy !req
866. but hilarious because this bitch
Copy !req
867. is just bombing
all of her jokes.
Copy !req
868. Okay, okay, okay.
Copy !req
869. Now that, you know, I got
my balls out of the way
Copy !req
870. and I'm bombing, I'm bombing,
I know, I know.
Copy !req
871. Nina West.
Copy !req
872. Oh, yes!
Copy !req
873. Oh, I'm sorry.
I thought you could speak whale.
Copy !req
874. Heidi, you really remind me
Copy !req
875. of the people I grew up with
on the farm:
Copy !req
876. gap-toothed
and full of bull semen.
Copy !req
877. Oh!
Copy !req
878. Girl, huh?
Copy !req
879. Valentina, you are
such a beautiful sista,
Copy !req
880. but you have this diva attitude
that's really hard to swallow.
Copy !req
881. I do.
Copy !req
882. It's just as hard to swallow
Copy !req
883. as Loni Love's comedy career.
Copy !req
884. Oh!
Copy !req
885. You're the one bombing!
Copy !req
886. No!
Copy !req
887. I love it!
Copy !req
888. You like that?
You like that, RuPaul?
Copy !req
889. I mean, RuPaul,
you are such a fashion icon.
Copy !req
890. If you could stand up
for us, please?
Copy !req
891. Utica tanked the roast
really hard.
Copy !req
892. I don't even know
how you crawl out of that.
Copy !req
893. And now it's time to bring up
the amazing Gottmik.
Copy !req
894. She's so small, her shoe size
is the same as her IQ: six.
Copy !req
895. Give it up for Gottmik!
Copy !req
896. - Jesus Christ.
- Molly, you in danger, girl.
Copy !req
897. There's definitely tension,
Copy !req
898. and it's my turn,
and I'm scared.
Copy !req
899. Good night, good night.
Copy !req
900. Welcome back
to the Nice Girls Roast.
Copy !req
901. Oh, thank you, thank you.
Copy !req
902. Wow. How will I ever
follow that one up?
Copy !req
903. Ooh.
Copy !req
904. After your set, I really realize
Copy !req
905. that it's so fitting
Copy !req
906. that your name begins
with the letters name U-T-I,
Copy !req
907. because you make me
extremely uncomfortable
Copy !req
908. and I feel like I need
a full bottle of pills
Copy !req
909. to forget about you.
Copy !req
910. Heidi N Closet.
Copy !req
911. Hi, my love.
How are you tonight?
Copy !req
912. You lip synced more times
than our angel here, Valentina,
Copy !req
913. has attempted to block
the words Rent Live
Copy !req
914. on social media.
Copy !req
915. But moving on to our judges,
hi, you guys.
Copy !req
916. Hi!
Copy !req
917. Loni Love, I just cannot believe
I am standing up here
Copy !req
918. presenting my comedy
in front of you.
Copy !req
919. I knew there was gonna be
budget cuts this season,
Copy !req
920. but I didn't know it was gonna
affect the judges' panel, too!
Copy !req
921. - Hi, Ru.
- Hi-ee!
Copy !req
922. - How are you?
- Good.
Copy !req
923. I am such a huge fan
of you and your work
Copy !req
924. and all of your hit song.
Copy !req
925. Hi, Ross.
Copy !req
926. Hi!
Copy !req
927. I love you so much,
Copy !req
928. and you are the only person
I have ever met
Copy !req
929. that watches porn
Copy !req
930. and cums when
the pizza gets delivered.
Copy !req
931. What is up with that? Oh!
Copy !req
932. You got a point.
Copy !req
933. Well, did you guys
have fun with my set?
Copy !req
934. Yes, all right.
Copy !req
935. Well, hopefully my laughs
Copy !req
936. will get you through
the awkward silences
Copy !req
937. on the next bitch's set. Yeah.
Copy !req
938. So give it up for Olivia Lux!
Copy !req
939. This is so fun. Thanks, gorg!
Copy !req
940. Yes.
Copy !req
941. I know... I know
what you're thinking:
Copy !req
942. the polite queen roasting.
Copy !req
943. I didn't come here
just to be Miss Congeniality.
Copy !req
944. You see where that gets you.
Copy !req
945. I came here to win,
Copy !req
946. something Kandy Muse has yet
to do in a maxi-challenge.
Copy !req
947. All right, the judges.
Copy !req
948. Hi, judges.
Copy !req
949. Hi-ee.
Copy !req
950. Mama Ru.
Copy !req
951. Mama Ru,
the patient zero of drag queens.
Copy !req
952. Mama Ru is so old,
Copy !req
953. her first drag name
was in hieroglyphics.
Copy !req
954. Mama Ru is so old,
Copy !req
955. she signed the Declaration
of Independence
Copy !req
956. as parent/guardian.
Copy !req
957. Nina West.
Copy !req
958. Nina West wanted
to be on Drag Raceso bad
Copy !req
959. there's only been 13 seasons,
Copy !req
960. and somehow she managed
to audition 38 times.
Copy !req
961. Valentina.
Copy !req
962. I noticed Valentina's eyebrows
are like tally marks:
Copy !req
963. one, two, three, four,
five, um, six, um...
Copy !req
964. It's like she's counting
Copy !req
965. how many times
I've been in the bottom.
Copy !req
966. One, two, three, four...
Copy !req
967. - Oh.
- Whoa.
Copy !req
968. Well, look at your brows, girl.
Copy !req
969. Well, thank you, everyone,
Copy !req
970. and if you didn't like my set,
my name's Michelle Visage.
Copy !req
971. All right.
Copy !req
972. The next queen,
she's wearing silver tonight
Copy !req
973. because in our lip sync,
she came in second place.
Copy !req
974. I sent her home once,
and I can't wait to do it again.
Copy !req
975. Let's give it up for Rosé.
Copy !req
976. Everyone listen,
my name is Rosé,
Copy !req
977. and before I get started,
I do want us all
Copy !req
978. to give one more massive round
of applause for Miss Olivia Lux,
Copy !req
979. who, after what
we just experienced,
Copy !req
980. will now forever go
by the name Olivia Sux.
Copy !req
981. Valentina, I can't believe I'm
standing on this stage with you.
Copy !req
982. I credit a lot of my love
for polish and perfection today
Copy !req
983. to watching Valentina
while Season 9 was airing.
Copy !req
984. And coincidentally,
during All Stars 4,
Copy !req
985. I too realized that I am
completely fucking delusional.
Copy !req
986. Yes!
Copy !req
987. Nina West is here, everybody!
Copy !req
988. Nina West's shoulders
are so wide
Copy !req
989. that in high school, she
auditioned for the school play
Copy !req
990. and got the part of the stage.
Copy !req
991. Now, Heidi and I
are actually friends.
Copy !req
992. Heidi and I got to know each
other last year in New York.
Copy !req
993. We've hung out a few times,
and how you doing, Heidi?
Copy !req
994. - Blessed and highly favored as...
- Okay, great.
Copy !req
995. So we've been talking
for about 10 seconds.
Copy !req
996. This is the longest on record
Copy !req
997. that Heidi has ever waited
before trying to fuck me.
Copy !req
998. - Ooh!
- Oh, girl!
Copy !req
999. - Heidi, is it true?
- Lies!
Copy !req
1000. - No, it's not lies, baby.
- Lies!
Copy !req
1001. The only thing that is
thirstier than Heidi N Closet
Copy !req
1002. are her makeup brushes, okay?
Copy !req
1003. Yes, oh, RuPaul,
you always look beautiful,
Copy !req
1004. and I'm really proud to announce
Copy !req
1005. that it's not the only thing
that we share in common.
Copy !req
1006. I want you all to know
that Ru and I
Copy !req
1007. are both actively working
in the music industry.
Copy !req
1008. One of us is a recording artist
Copy !req
1009. and one is a singer.
Copy !req
1010. All right, everybody, well,
listen, I've had a great time.
Copy !req
1011. But before I leave, I want
to leave you with some words.
Copy !req
1012. Well, actually,
it's for you, Kandy.
Copy !req
1013. Kandy, I'm really proud of you
Copy !req
1014. for what you've done
this season,
Copy !req
1015. but mostly for tonight,
Copy !req
1016. because I know
it takes tremendous courage
Copy !req
1017. to show up to a roast
when you are a roast.
Copy !req
1018. Thank you, I'm Rosé.
Have a wonderful night.
Copy !req
1019. Let's hear from
our guests of honor.
Copy !req
1020. Any final words?
Copy !req
1021. Y'all so kind, so kind to me.
Copy !req
1022. Thank you so much.
Copy !req
1023. Being the current reigning
Miss Congeniality,
Copy !req
1024. I want to say this
as nice as possible,
Copy !req
1025. and it comes deep
from my heart, okay?
Copy !req
1026. Fuck you, fuck you,
Copy !req
1027. fuck you, and...
Copy !req
1028. Not you, you got the checks.
Copy !req
1029. And fuck you!
Copy !req
1030. I'm actually here tonight
Copy !req
1031. to return the title
of Miss Congeniality.
Copy !req
1032. I tried it for a year,
but I'm too much of a diva,
Copy !req
1033. so I'll take Miss French
Vanilla Fan Favorite Fantasy.
Copy !req
1034. Kandy Muse is here,
Copy !req
1035. Kandy Muse
from the Bronx... Zoo.
Copy !req
1036. Remember this, guys:
go big, be kind,
Copy !req
1037. and if you're nice,
Copy !req
1038. you could actually end up
on stage with these beasts.
Copy !req
1039. Thanks for having us.
Copy !req
1040. Coming up...
Copy !req
1041. You have a future in stand-up.
Copy !req
1042. I laughed from the beginning
to the end.
Copy !req
1043. I don't think it fully worked.
Copy !req
1044. Boo!
Copy !req
1045. Welcome, queens.
Copy !req
1046. It's time for
the judges' critiques,
Copy !req
1047. starting with Kandy Muse.
Copy !req
1048. You started the roast tonight,
and that's a tough position,
Copy !req
1049. but you set the bar tonight.
Copy !req
1050. Bitch, she died.
Copy !req
1051. I compared everyone after you
to you.
Copy !req
1052. You were so funny,
and you felt, like, in the zone.
Copy !req
1053. I laughed from the beginning
to the end.
Copy !req
1054. We were howling over here,
and that's what it's about.
Copy !req
1055. You had the energy,
the confidence.
Copy !req
1056. You were my Don Rickles tonight.
Copy !req
1057. You look great.
Copy !req
1058. I live for this
extremely cinched moment.
Copy !req
1059. I would have liked
a little bit more hair maybe
Copy !req
1060. on top of your head.
Copy !req
1061. But your roast was so good
Copy !req
1062. that you deserve praise
for that.
Copy !req
1063. Well done, Kandy.
Copy !req
1064. Thank you.
Copy !req
1065. All right, up next, Symone.
You look gorgeous.
Copy !req
1066. Thank you.
Copy !req
1067. Symone, you have been so funny
in so many challenges,
Copy !req
1068. so I was really
looking forward to seeing you.
Copy !req
1069. And you did have
some funny lines in there.
Copy !req
1070. It was the setup and the punch.
Copy !req
1071. It just never fully took off.
Copy !req
1072. When we were talking to you,
Michelle and I,
Copy !req
1073. we said to shorten your jokes
a little bit.
Copy !req
1074. Just remember,
short is sweet is better.
Copy !req
1075. You were overthinking it,
Copy !req
1076. your cards
were getting in the way,
Copy !req
1077. one thing led to another,
and it just became a spiral.
Copy !req
1078. I know exactly what I want,
Copy !req
1079. I know exactly
how I want to execute it,
Copy !req
1080. and when it doesn't go that way,
Copy !req
1081. I kind of shut down
a little bit.
Copy !req
1082. I have bombed many a day,
Copy !req
1083. and believe me,
I just hang in there.
Copy !req
1084. All right, thanks.
Copy !req
1085. Thank you.
Copy !req
1086. Up next, Utica Queen.
Copy !req
1087. I was very interested to see
how you would do roast,
Copy !req
1088. because you're all about joy
and positivity, and you went in.
Copy !req
1089. In a roast,
nothing is off limits
Copy !req
1090. as long as it's funny.
Copy !req
1091. And I felt like some of these
were just observations
Copy !req
1092. and kind of harsh.
Copy !req
1093. When you came out, that first
joke was very, very funny.
Copy !req
1094. Balls to bomb that hard.
Copy !req
1095. But once you lost your footing
a little bit,
Copy !req
1096. we could tell that your go-to
Copy !req
1097. is to get a little mean
to save it.
Copy !req
1098. And you wanna try
not to be mean,
Copy !req
1099. but cut and funny.
Copy !req
1100. - Yeah.
- It's a fine line.
Copy !req
1101. That's what Loni and I
were trying to tell you.
Copy !req
1102. I'm still learning what
is comedy and what is offensive.
Copy !req
1103. When it got off the rails,
Copy !req
1104. I started, like,
grasping for straws
Copy !req
1105. and trying to save myself.
Copy !req
1106. Maybe not your comfort zone.
Copy !req
1107. A big swing, a bit of a miss.
Copy !req
1108. I'll tell you this.
Copy !req
1109. This might be my favorite look
you've done all season.
Copy !req
1110. - I really love it.
- Thank you.
Copy !req
1111. It's so gorgeous, it's so
Upper East Side society lady.
Copy !req
1112. I wish I could say
the same about yours.
Copy !req
1113. Fuck you.
Copy !req
1114. If I'm gonna take anything
from this competition,
Copy !req
1115. it's that I got two sets
of middle fingers from you,
Copy !req
1116. so thank you.
Copy !req
1117. I gave you this, too.
Copy !req
1118. This is the nastiest
hand gesture ever.
Copy !req
1119. - Ever.
- Bonus!
Copy !req
1120. It means "I love you."
Copy !req
1121. All right, up next, Gottmik.
Copy !req
1122. Out of everyone that we coached
yesterday, Michelle and I,
Copy !req
1123. you listened, and it paid off.
Copy !req
1124. I thought it was really strong.
Copy !req
1125. Your joke about me was
my favorite about me tonight.
Copy !req
1126. You cums when the pizza
gets delivered.
Copy !req
1127. I feel seen, Gottmik!
Copy !req
1128. There's a reason why
my sorority name
Copy !req
1129. was Meat Lover's Supreme,
all right?
Copy !req
1130. The way you delivered
some of the jokes
Copy !req
1131. were very Phyllis Diller.
Copy !req
1132. I think you have a future
in stand-up. I really do.
Copy !req
1133. Oh, my gosh, thanks.
Copy !req
1134. Coming in here,
this was the one thing
Copy !req
1135. that I was, like,
I do not want to do a roast.
Copy !req
1136. I was, like, absolutely not.
Copy !req
1137. I feel like I have found
Copy !req
1138. this gorgeous little way
to read people
Copy !req
1139. that I didn't know I could do.
Copy !req
1140. It is the 'mones.
They get me going.
Copy !req
1141. Yeah, blame it on the 'mones.
Copy !req
1142. Yes, if I had a nickel...
Copy !req
1143. I'd have one nickel.
Copy !req
1144. Okay, thank you.
Copy !req
1145. Up next, Olivia Lux.
Copy !req
1146. You know, from day one
Copy !req
1147. I've just been obsessed
with how likable you are.
Copy !req
1148. That is a tough thing to be
in a roast.
Copy !req
1149. I thought you did have
some jokes that landed,
Copy !req
1150. but I don't think
it fully worked.
Copy !req
1151. You know,
when you came on stage,
Copy !req
1152. even the little walk
that you did
Copy !req
1153. felt kind of like an apology.
Copy !req
1154. It was almost like a disclaimer.
Copy !req
1155. I definitely knew that I had
Copy !req
1156. this, like, sweet,
you know, character.
Copy !req
1157. I like the idea of, like,
turning it all the way up
Copy !req
1158. and then killing them
with kindness
Copy !req
1159. and being, like, she said that?
Copy !req
1160. But in such a sweet way.
Copy !req
1161. You felt that you fulfilled
the challenge?
Copy !req
1162. I feel as though
I fulfilled the challenge.
Copy !req
1163. Hmm.
Copy !req
1164. - All right, thanks.
- Thank you.
Copy !req
1165. All right, straight from
First Avenue in Minneapolis
Copy !req
1166. after a headlining set
with Sheila E
Copy !req
1167. and the New Power Generation,
it is Rosé.
Copy !req
1168. I love that outfit.
It's a really fun look.
Copy !req
1169. Thank you.
Copy !req
1170. You came out tonight,
and you owned it.
Copy !req
1171. I think you executed it
beautifully,
Copy !req
1172. and you were the only one
without cards,
Copy !req
1173. so you deserve credit for that.
Copy !req
1174. It was a great set,
and you had to close the show,
Copy !req
1175. which is the hardest thing
to do.
Copy !req
1176. Rosé, you were
my Joan Rivers tonight.
Copy !req
1177. Olivia Sux.
Copy !req
1178. Your transitions were so smooth.
Copy !req
1179. But during rehearsal,
you were better.
Copy !req
1180. When I first started
doing stand-up, you know,
Copy !req
1181. I would have to do
two shows a night.
Copy !req
1182. So I'd do my first show,
and if I killed,
Copy !req
1183. the second show
was always different.
Copy !req
1184. Just remember to never
take anything for granted.
Copy !req
1185. And what I also think
is that you have everything.
Copy !req
1186. You have the total package.
Copy !req
1187. You are ready
to just keep performing.
Copy !req
1188. Good job.
Copy !req
1189. Thank you, Loni.
Copy !req
1190. Thank you, ladies.
I think we've heard enough.
Copy !req
1191. While you untuck backstage,
Copy !req
1192. the judges and I
will deliberate.
Copy !req
1193. Okay, just between us
squirrel friends,
Copy !req
1194. what do you think,
starting with Kandy Muse?
Copy !req
1195. Oh, oh, oh, our Kandy Muse
knocked it out the park, son!
Copy !req
1196. Kandy gave us that
old school corner club vibe.
Copy !req
1197. I loved it. I felt like
I was right back there in 1975.
Copy !req
1198. Tonight was fantastic.
Copy !req
1199. She set the bar from
the beginning of the roast,
Copy !req
1200. and no other queen topped her.
Copy !req
1201. I just am so proud of Kandy,
I could spit.
Copy !req
1202. - Mm-hmm.
- But I won't.
Copy !req
1203. Symone.
Copy !req
1204. Tonight, for me, Symone
sort of fell on her face.
Copy !req
1205. There were some jokes
hidden in there,
Copy !req
1206. but she wasn't selling them.
Copy !req
1207. Her setups were really long,
Copy !req
1208. and then the punchlines
were cute,
Copy !req
1209. but it took so long to get there
Copy !req
1210. that you weren't even, like,
interested in laughing.
Copy !req
1211. I do, however, wanna give her
credit for staying in character.
Copy !req
1212. However, that character
really didn't help her
Copy !req
1213. get through all of the losses
Copy !req
1214. that she suffered
with those jokes.
Copy !req
1215. This just wasn't her night.
Copy !req
1216. I was happy to see her
leave the stage.
Copy !req
1217. Utica Queen.
Copy !req
1218. Boo!
Copy !req
1219. Boo!
Copy !req
1220. When we were coaching her,
we were trying to help her.
Copy !req
1221. And we were saying,
"Hey, don't be so mean."
Copy !req
1222. She's gotta
find a way to listen.
Copy !req
1223. Just wasn't funny tonight.
Copy !req
1224. Moving on to Gottmik.
Copy !req
1225. This one has the goods.
Copy !req
1226. It felt easy watching her.
Copy !req
1227. She felt like she
planted herself at a podium
Copy !req
1228. and she, like,
delivered it to us.
Copy !req
1229. You know, the best comics
are able to take the stage,
Copy !req
1230. and within a few seconds
let the audience know
Copy !req
1231. exactly the point of view
that they're coming from.
Copy !req
1232. Yes. Her jokes were fire.
They were hitting.
Copy !req
1233. She automatically knew
what she wanted to do.
Copy !req
1234. I just wanted
to see more of her.
Copy !req
1235. Olivia Lux.
Copy !req
1236. She came out there
and said, I'm nice,
Copy !req
1237. and I'm not used to doing this.
Copy !req
1238. And we're like, girl,
snap out of it,
Copy !req
1239. because you have to
get up there and roast.
Copy !req
1240. And it could have been great,
because you know
Copy !req
1241. like when Betty White
delivers a real zinger?
Copy !req
1242. And you're like, oh,
that was so unexpected!
Copy !req
1243. She could have had that moment.
Copy !req
1244. She relied on just being cute
Copy !req
1245. without delivering
the joke part.
Copy !req
1246. There were a few.
Copy !req
1247. The section with you was great.
Copy !req
1248. Parent/guardian.
Copy !req
1249. But that was it.
Copy !req
1250. She is so likable and so lovable
Copy !req
1251. and watchable and sweet,
Copy !req
1252. but it's starting
to be one-note.
Copy !req
1253. Mm-hmm. All right, Rosé.
Copy !req
1254. Rosé knows what she's doing
on stage.
Copy !req
1255. She's got that presence
that just is so commanding,
Copy !req
1256. that voice that's, "Hello!"
Copy !req
1257. I wanna look at her,
I turn my head to see her,
Copy !req
1258. and you can't deny she's meant
to be up on that stage.
Copy !req
1259. I thought she nailed it tonight,
Copy !req
1260. but she definitely
was funnier in rehearsal.
Copy !req
1261. I think the silence of the room
threw her off.
Copy !req
1262. And then she kicked it in,
and then it was a home run.
Copy !req
1263. This girl is like Bianca.
She can do whatever...
Copy !req
1264. Silence.
Copy !req
1265. I've made my decision.
Copy !req
1266. Bring back my queens.
Copy !req
1267. Chop, chop.
Copy !req
1268. Welcome back, ladies.
Copy !req
1269. I've made some decisions.
Copy !req
1270. Rosé. Tonight,
you were Sheila E-larious.
Copy !req
1271. You are safe.
Copy !req
1272. Thank you.
Copy !req
1273. You may step
to the back of the stage.
Copy !req
1274. Symone. You were a vision
in 24 karat gold,
Copy !req
1275. but your set
was tin roof rusted.
Copy !req
1276. I'm sorry, my dear,
but you are up for elimination.
Copy !req
1277. Kandy Muse.
Copy !req
1278. You're right,
this is the Olympics of drag,
Copy !req
1279. and tonight, you won the gold.
Copy !req
1280. Con-drag-ulations.
Copy !req
1281. You're the winner
of this week's challenge.
Copy !req
1282. Finally, bitch!
Copy !req
1283. Werk!
Copy !req
1284. You better werk, bitch.
Copy !req
1285. You've won a cash tip of $5,000.
Copy !req
1286. Yes, I won a challenge!
Copy !req
1287. And, baby,
I am Miss Comedy Queen.
Copy !req
1288. Gottmik.
Copy !req
1289. Your roast was gorg.
Copy !req
1290. You're safe.
Copy !req
1291. Thank you, guys.
Copy !req
1292. Olivia Lux.
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1293. Tonight you were consistent:
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1294. consistently one-note.
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1295. Utica.
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1296. You started off with a bang,
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1297. but you ended up
shooting yourself in the foot.
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1298. Olivia Lux.
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1299. - You're safe.
- Thank you.
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1300. You may join the other girls.
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1301. Utica, I'm sorry, my dear,
but you are up for elimination.
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1302. I'm not surprised
that I'm in the bottom.
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1303. However, I'm excited
to lip sync again.
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1304. That's where I come alive.
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1305. So bring it on.
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1306. Two queens stand before me.
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1307. Ladies, this is your last chance
to impress me
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1308. and save yourself
from elimination.
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1309. The time has come...
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1310. for you to lip sync...
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1311. for your life.
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1312. She has sent two people home,
but this is my place here,
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1313. and I'm about to have
to fight to stay here.
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1314. Good luck, and don't fuck it up.
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1315. I am just basking in the words.
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1316. I'm really trying to
punch this song in the face
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1317. and really show the judges
I want to stay here.
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1318. I am 1,000%
determined to survive.
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1319. Ladies, I've made my decision.
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1320. Symone, shantay you stay.
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1321. Thank you. Thank you very much.
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1322. Not again. Not again.
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1323. You may join the other girls.
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1324. Great job!
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1325. Syracuse, Schenectady, Utica,
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1326. next stop, the world.
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1327. Keep on wiggling, sis.
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1328. Thank you so much.
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1329. And Ru, I have one thing to say.
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1330. Thank you, really,
this has been magical,
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1331. and I love each
and every one of you.
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1332. You're amazing, so thank you.
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1333. Now sashay away.
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1334. Utica Queen!
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1335. Well, when you think
you can't, Utican.
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1336. Love you guys. Bye!
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1337. As I am sashaying away,
I'm feeling honestly happy.
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1338. For my first roast, at least
I know I have potential.
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1339. And I know that I got
some good zingers in there.
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1340. I don't know,
maybe in the near future
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1341. I could become
an expert roaster.
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1342. So that makes me happy.
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1343. You gotta wiggle to the top.
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1344. Con-drag-ulations, ladies.
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1345. And remember,
if you can't love yourself,
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1346. how in the hell you gonna
love somebody else?
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1347. Can I get an "amen" up in here?
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1348. - Amen!
- Amen!
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1349. All right.
Now let the music play.
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1350. Next time
onRuPaul's Drag Race...
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1351. You'll all be starring
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1352. in Henny,
I Shrunk the Drag Queens!
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1353. Hey, girls, how's it going?
It's Scarlett.
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1354. And action.
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1355. Jump!
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1356. Oh, ouch.
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1357. Ouch, ow.
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1358. You were so fun to direct.
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1359. This was, like, my wet dream.
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1360. This isn't enough
for the final five.
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1361. It feels like things are
just falling apart around me.
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1362. I don't wanna
disappoint anybody.
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1363. I don't want that
to be my story.
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