Robot Chicken 3x16

Directed by

Conan the Barbarian tells us "What is Best in Life" with a song. The Nerds find out Revenge comes with a price. President Jenna Bush trades the Oil Crisis for the Corn Crisis. The Saved by the Bell kids meet Jigsaw from Saw, and Screech will never be the same. The Borg track the Enterprise to its hiding place—Las Vegas’ Star Trek Experience.

Request examples:

!req Robot Chicken 3x16 [02:32]
!req Robot Chicken 3x16 [Robot Chicken 3x16]
Syntax: !req EPISODE [quote or timestamp] (max. 8 square brackets)

For quotes, now you can request by index (e.g !req Robot Chicken 3x16 [10-11]; !req Robot Chicken 3x16 [20] [24]). Keep in mind, though, that index numbers might change at any time.
You can also generate a copy command with the quotes. Hover the desired subtitle and enter the amount of lines you want to copy.

Subtitle languages: English • Spanish • Brazilian Portuguese

Note: you must use specific languages with their specific pages/discord channels.

1. >> IT'S ALIVE!

2. >> IT'S ALIVE!

3. >> KIDS, I'VE ENLISTED THE HELP

4. CRAIGSLIST TO EXPLAIN EINSTEIN'S THEORY OF RELATIVITY.

5. SO, COME ON IN, GUYS.

6. THIS IS THE CLASS.

7. >> ♪ AND I'M MC-SQUARED ♪ >> ♪ WE CAME TO RHYME, AND WE

8. CAME PREPARED ♪ >> ♪ YO, I LIKE THIS BEAT THAT

9. YOU'RE GIVIN' ME ♪ ♪ NOW TELL ME THE THEORY OF

10. RELATIVITY ♪ >> ♪ "E" STANDS FOR ENERGY,

11. SUCKA FOOLS ♪ >> ♪ IT'S NOT MEASURED IN WATTS,

12. BITCH, IT'S MEASURED IN JOULES ♪ >> ♪ LISTEN UP, CLASS, THE "M"

13. IS FOR MASS ♪ >> ♪ AND IF YOU DON'T LIKE IT,

14. YOU CAN KISS MY ASS ♪ >> ♪ THE "C" STANDS FOR SPEED OF

15. LIGHT IN A VACUUM ♪ >> ♪ SO BACK UP, HOES, AND GIVE

16. US SOME ROOM ♪ >> ♪ AN INVARIANT MASS REQUIRES

17. REST ENERGY WITHOUT A HITCH ♪ >> ♪ WHICH MADE NEWTON'S SECOND

18. MECHANICS, BITCH ♪

19. >> YO, WE ALSO GOT ONE ABOUT ALGEBRA.

20. >> YEAH.

21. EQUALS THESE NUTS, BITCH.

22. >> >> OW, OW, OOH, OW.

23. GOD, THOSE THINGS ARE ANUS-SHATTERING.

24. UH, AAH, OH.

25. OVERHEATED AGAIN?

26. PIECE OF CRAP.

27. COME ON, COME ON, COME ON, COME ON, COME ON, COME ON.

28. OH, YEAH.

29. THAT'S A WEIRD TRAFFIC MARKING.

30. WHOA! HOLY OOH, OH, OW, OW, OW.

31. I CAN'T F-FEEL MY LEGS.

32. OH, OH, THANK YOU.

33. OH, OH, THANK YOU, BLESS YOU.

34. I NEED TO GO TO A HOSPITAL.

35. OH, THANK YOU SO MUCH.

36. THANK YOU.

37. OH, AAH, OH, AAH, OH.

38. THIS GAME!

39. >> UH-OH.

40. MY WAR INJURY'S ACTING UP AGAIN.

41. >> DO IT AGAIN, UNCLE GLEN.

42. >> MAYBE LATER.

43. UNCLE GLEN NEEDS A BEER.

44. AHH.

45. W-WHAT THE...

46. WHO ARE YOU?

47. >> REMOVING YOUR FINGER — THAT'S A GOOD POWER, UNCLE GLEN.

48. I MUST HAVE IT.

49. >> >> KIDS, WHERE'S YOUR

50. UNCLE GLEN?

51. >> WE DON'T KNOW, MAMA.

52. >> HE'S GONE.

53. >> OH, HE MUST BE HAVING ONE OF

54. AGAIN.

55. >> UH-OH.

56. EVERY ONCE IN A WHILE, THIS

57. POWER BACKFIRES.

58. >> I CAN SEE!

59. OH, MAGOO, YOU'VE DONE IT AGAIN.

60. OF ME—

61. >> >> MY GOODNESS!

62. FATHER, WHAT'S THAT?

63. >> IT APPEARS TO BE A JUNGLE-DWELLING APE-MAN.

64. >> YEAH, YEAH, I KNOW.

65. I MEANT THAT!

66. >> OH, THAT'S A PENIS.

67. >> I THINK I LIKE PENIS.

68. >> WELL, YOU ARE YOUR MOTHER'S DAUGHTER.

69. >> JANE. ME JANE.

70. >> JANE.

71. >> THAT'S RIGHT! VERY GOOD!

72. >> JANE, JANE, JANE.

73. JANE.

74. >> YES! MY NAME IS JANE!

75. >> ME SAVE YOU.

76. >> TARZAN, MY HERO.

77. >> >>

78. TARZAN, MY HERO.

79. >> AAAAHH!

80. OOH —

81. AAAAHH!

82. >> OOH!

83. >> TARZAN, DON'T MOVE.

84. I'LL GO GET YOU A DOCTOR.

85. >> NO, JANE, HUMANS BAD.

86. ME NO WANT DOCTOR.

87. ME NO WANT JANE, NEITHER.

88. >> YOU MEAN "EITHER," NOT —

89. >> ME FREAKING APE-MAN!

90. ME NOT GIVE CRAP!

91. >> >> TARZAN NEVER SAW JANE AGAIN.

92. APES COULD PROVIDE.

93. >> >> UH-OH.

94. >> HMM.

95. GOING.

96. >> WE, THE JURY, FIND THE DEFENDANT... DELIGHTFUL!

97. >> WELL, THANK YOU VERY MUCH.

98. >> I FLOSSED AND BRUSHED MY

99. TEETH AGAIN.

100. THEY SAY, "ONLY FLOSS THE ONES YOU WANT TO KEEP."

101. I ALWAYS LIKED THAT JOKE.

102. MOUTHWASH.

103. KILLS GINGIVITIS.

104. OF GUM DISEASE.

105. THE STREET.

106. GRANDMA COULDN'T HAVE BEEN LESS THAN 90 YEARS OLD.

107. YEARS, LOTS OF STORIES TO TELL,

108. AND A FAMILY THAT LOVES HER.

109. LET ME HELP YOU OUT, GRANNY.

110. GRANNY COULD CROSS.

111. I'M WALKING HERE.

112. LOVE THAT LINE.

113. MY HEART STOP.

114. PUSSY WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TREE.

115. >> >> A LITTLE KID CRYING FOR IT.

116. POOR KID.

117. HIS SHOES, AND HIS DAMN KITTEN'S

118. LIFE IS IN MY HANDS.

119. HERE YOU GO, BUDDY.

120. TIPPED THE BARISTA 5 BUCKS FOR MY SOY LATTE.

121. THESE LATTES ARE GOOD.

122. GOOD ENOUGH TO KILL FOR, BUT I'D NEVER DO THAT.

123. KILLING IS BAD, UNLESS YOU'RE KILLING GINGIVITIS.

124. >> 18.

125. 19.

126. AND 20, OR ONE SCORE.

127. >> WHEW.

128. >> GETTING A GOOD ASS-KICKING IN HERE.

129. HEY, ROBERT E. LEE, WHERE DO YOU THINK YOU'RE GOING?

130. SEVEN KICKS TO THE BALLS TO GO.

131. >> THIS IS A ROBBERY.

132. INCONSEQUENTIAL BILLS.

133. >> WOW, I'M GETTING ROBBED BY NICOLE RICHIE.

134. >> SHH. SHUT UP.

135. MY FRIEND PARIS.

136. >> FOR A ROBBERY?

137. THAT.

138. >> GOOD POINT.

139. >> STUPID CELEBRITY.

140. ARMED ROBBERY AND MURDER?

141. YOU'LL BE LOCKED UP FOR 45 DAYS.

142. >> AM I LOCKED UP?

143. UP, AND I AM TRULY —

144. >> SHUT UP, YOU BITCH!

145. GET OUT OF MY HEAD!

146. AAH! SHE'S IN MY BRAIN!

147. >> NICOLE, IS THAT YOU?

148. >> PARIS!

149. I COULDN'T LET MY BEST BUD/MEAL TICKET ROT IN JAIL, NOW, COULD

150. I?

151. WINK.

152. >> BUT NOW WE'RE BOTH LOCKED UP.

153. >> DON'T WORRY.

154. ME.

155. >> I RECOGNIZE THOSE SYMBOLS.

156. >> THEY'RE WORDS, PARIS.

157. >> WHAT?

158. >> OH, YES!

159. OH, YES!

160. GIVE IT TO ME, GUARD.

161. OH, YEAH, THAT'S GOOD.

162. OH, YOU'RE THE RIGHT GUARD.

163. >> YEAH, THAT'S HOT, THAT'S HOT, THAT'S HOT.

164. >> YEAH, UNLOCK MY CELL, MY VAGINA CELL.

165. YEAH!

166. >> WHOO!

167. THAT WAS GREAT, LADIES, BUT NOW

168. >> HEY, I FORGOT TO USE THE

169. POISON.

170. >> OH, WHY DOES THAT

171. BOYFRIENDS?

172. >> YOU SHOULD REALLY SEE A GYNECOLOGIST.

173. >> WE NOW CANCEL "CAVEMEN" TO

174. LYNWOOD PRISON.

175. AND NICOLE RICHIE HAVE ESCAPED.

176. LIONEL RICHIE.

177. >> NICOLE, IT IS OVER.

178. YOU GOT NOWHERE LEFT TO RUN.

179. >> THE JOKE'S ON YOU.

180. I WEIGH 62 POUNDS.

181. A SPIDER MONKEY.

182. >> UP, UP, AND AWAY, FALKOR.

183. >> NO!

184. >> YAY!

185. AAAH!

186. THAT'S NOT HOT.

187. >> MMM.

188. ONE OF THOSE.

189. WHERE IS OUR CABANA BOY?

190. PARIS!

191. >> OOPS, I DID IT AGAIN...

192. WITH MY VAGINA.

193. >> LAUGHING MAKES ME HUNGRY.

194. BA-GAWK! BAWK.