1. Alright. The options for this month's game night are:Copy !req
2. checkers, cards, Double Dutch, Tiddly Winks and—Copy !req
3. "My Mom" isn't a game, Muscle Man.Copy !req
4. That doesn't even make sense.Copy !req
5. Looks like I win!Copy !req
6. Let's play Ball-bo Catcher!Copy !req
7. A crossword puzzle?Copy !req
8. Okay, let's vote.Copy !req
9. Yes, Mordecai?Copy !req
10. Oh, nothing.Copy !req
11. Do you have a better idea?Copy !req
12. We could play one of those stale old games we usually play.Copy !req
13. Or we could play the sci-fi fantasy epic of the century!Copy !req
14. Behold, The Realm of Darthon!Copy !req
15. So, what is it?Copy !req
16. It's a role-playing game.Copy !req
17. We make up an adventure and you guys try to beat it.Copy !req
18. You can use magic and stuff!Copy !req
19. A game of imagination? What fun!Copy !req
20. Sounds lame.Copy !req
21. No way!Copy !req
22. The guy at the store told us it's the hottest RPG of the year!Copy !req
23. All in favor?Copy !req
24. - Yeah, yeah! - I guess.Copy !req
25. Darthon! Darthon!Copy !req
26. Get ready for the best game night of your life!Copy !req
27. Your party walks down a long hallway and reaches a locked door.Copy !req
28. What do you do?Copy !req
29. I smash it open with my war claw!Copy !req
30. Then, a bunch of ladies come out, and they're all,Copy !req
31. "Ooh Muscle Man, quit pinching my butt with your war claw!"Copy !req
32. Roll the 50-sided die to see if you unlock the door.Copy !req
33. All we have is a 48-sided die and two marbles.Copy !req
34. Close enough.Copy !req
35. Did it work?Copy !req
36. I don't think so.Copy !req
37. This blows.Copy !req
38. Mordecai! Mordecai!Copy !req
39. But I'll reckon I'd like a turn now!Copy !req
40. Cyborg cowboys take three days to awaken from hypersleep.Copy !req
41. Sorry, Pops.Copy !req
42. Can't he cast a saving throw?Copy !req
43. What does all this stuff mean?Copy !req
44. Are we even in Darthon yet?Copy !req
45. Or is that just an artifact for something?Copy !req
46. Your party is suddenly ambushed by a flock of manbats!Copy !req
47. Skips the Mighty gets first strike!Copy !req
48. Let's see...Copy !req
49. Pirate samurai have plus two times two shen...Copy !req
50. minus three charisma... divide by number of geese...Copy !req
51. Do we have a protractor?Copy !req
52. I'm outta here.Copy !req
53. Worst game night ever!Copy !req
54. Dude, they're right! This game sucks!Copy !req
55. Let's get our money back.Copy !req
56. Out of the way! Out of the way, everybody!Copy !req
57. Coming through, coming through!Copy !req
58. Out of the way! Out of the way people!Copy !req
59. We're here for a refund.Copy !req
60. I'd love to give you a refund, but, you need a receipt for that.Copy !req
61. I got a receipt right here.Copy !req
62. Excellent. And now the unopened product?Copy !req
63. What? You can't return it if it's opened?Copy !req
64. Well, yes! It's clearly stated on the back of your receipt.Copy !req
65. What? That's lame! You can barely even see the writing!Copy !req
66. Yes, well, perhaps if you learned to read, it would be easy for you to see.Copy !req
67. Good day, gentlemen!Copy !req
68. Dude, just give us our money back. This game blows!Copy !req
69. Uh, The Realm of Darthon does not blow!Copy !req
70. You're probably doing it wrong.Copy !req
71. It's a role-playing game.Copy !req
72. You have to use your imagination.Copy !req
73. No way, dude! The game is the problem, not us!Copy !req
74. Uh, hey, are you guys gonna be wrapping this up soon?Copy !req
75. We're done here.Copy !req
76. Okay, I guess you won't mind if we tell people how "cool" your game is!Copy !req
77. Hey, everybody! Don't waste your time waiting in line for this huge piece.Copy !req
78. It's probably the worst game we've ever played.Copy !req
79. Yeah, and he won't even give us a refund.Copy !req
80. This guy doesn't give refunds, people!Copy !req
81. Let's go! I want you two out of my store, now!Copy !req
82. We can't let that guy get away with this.Copy !req
83. Dude, we spent the last of our cash on it!Copy !req
84. We have to get our money back.Copy !req
85. So, how do we do that?Copy !req
86. We'll just sabotage his business until he gives us our refund.Copy !req
87. Heh, nice outfits! Losers!Copy !req
88. You don't like these costumes?Copy !req
89. But they're from the "Make Your Own" section of the Darthon gamebook!Copy !req
90. That's right! We followed the instructions perfectly.Copy !req
91. But you used toilet paper rolls instead of paper towel rolls!Copy !req
92. The costumes look awesome when you do it right.Copy !req
93. Yeah? Do they look as awesome as the game pieces?Copy !req
94. Wait! There's lots of other characters if you don't like the pixie sorcerer!Copy !req
95. No there aren't! They're all just the same with different costumes.Copy !req
96. I didn't realize it was that kind of game!Copy !req
97. Nobody knows what kind of game it is.Copy !req
98. Is it medieval? Sci-fi? Western?Copy !req
99. It's a role-playing game!Copy !req
100. You have to use your imagination!Copy !req
101. That's right! Go get us our refund!Copy !req
102. No way!Copy !req
103. Dude. This campaign is just getting started.Copy !req
104. That's it!Copy !req
105. The Realm of Darthon does not suck!Copy !req
106. Yeah, but your costume does.Copy !req
107. No refunds!Copy !req
108. Dude, check out our costumes!Copy !req
109. Yeah, where are we?Copy !req
110. Welcome, to the Realm of Darthon!Copy !req
111. Leave while you still can!Copy !req
112. We're not leaving without a refund!Copy !req
113. Then come and get it!Copy !req
114. Did you hear that?Copy !req
115. I think it's coming from a— ... head!Copy !req
116. What are these things?Copy !req
117. Ignore it, dude.Copy !req
118. They're just lame enemies from the game.Copy !req
119. Lame? What do you think of manbats' teamwork?Copy !req
120. Next time, send enemies that don't blow!Copy !req
121. Well, if you didn't like those enemies,Copy !req
122. then how about some Mutant jellyfish!Copy !req
123. Robo-bears!Copy !req
124. Angry tree people with pixie sorcerers?Copy !req
125. Watch out!Copy !req
126. Dude! there are too many of the...Copy !req
127. Come on! Everyone knows technomancers can summon allies!Copy !req
128. Rigby!Copy !req
129. Summon allies!Copy !req
130. What the? I told you guys I didn't wanna play this game.Copy !req
131. We need your help!Copy !req
132. We need the refund from the game master!Copy !req
133. What?Copy !req
134. When this is over, you two are dead!Copy !req
135. I changed my mind! Technomancers can't summon allies!Copy !req
136. What? He's just cheating so he can win!Copy !req
137. Quit cheating!Copy !req
138. I'm not cheating! I'm using my imagination!Copy !req
139. That's what makes this game fun!Copy !req
140. That's what makes this game blow!Copy !req
141. Enough!Copy !req
142. I won't allow you to insult my realm any longer!Copy !req
143. I am Darthon!Copy !req
144. Still think this game blows?Copy !req
145. Lightning bolts have no effect on giant monsters!Copy !req
146. Projectile weapons deal damage to the user!Copy !req
147. Oh no! You stepped in a permafrost puddle!Copy !req
148. Players are frozen in place!Copy !req
149. Stay back!Copy !req
150. Self-destruct?Copy !req
151. We are not frozen.Copy !req
152. Looks like it's our turn!Copy !req
153. Your party is washed away by a flood!Copy !req
154. Our +3 awesomeness repels water!Copy !req
155. Fireballs are made of kittens!Copy !req
156. Kittens are man-eating tigers!Copy !req
157. Man-eating tigers turn into stuffed animals!Copy !req
158. Players lose their weapons when running!Copy !req
159. Warriors carry the immunity sword, which is immune to all rule changes!Copy !req
160. W-what? No! That's not—Copy !req
161. Now give us our refund.Copy !req
162. Yeah, we did it!Copy !req
163. Dude, are you okay?Copy !req
164. Yeah. I'm fine. Here's your refund.Copy !req
165. No, it's cool. You should keep it.Copy !req
166. No, no. You beat me fair and square.Copy !req
167. Are you sure you're okay?Copy !req
168. Yeah. We can take you to the hospital.Copy !req
169. No. No. I'm fine.Copy !req
170. I just need an icepack.Copy !req
171. I... just... gotta...Copy !req
172. I gotta go up and lay down for a bit.Copy !req
173. Mordecai! Rigby!Copy !req
174. Pops! Where have you guys been?Copy !req
175. We were hiding in the armor closet, then suddenly,Copy !req
176. we were in the stock room at Shoe Farm.Copy !req
177. Good thing it was worth it! Seven bones, baby!Copy !req
178. Seven dollars? We almost died for seven dollars?Copy !req
179. The numbers aren't important!Copy !req
180. It was the principle!Copy !req
181. Yeah! If we're gonna spend that kind of money, it's gotta be on a cool game!Copy !req
182. Yeah! Something like Trail of Elderich or The Lair of Anthalon.Copy !req
183. Dude! Is that out?Copy !req
184. Yeah. It came out last week.Copy !req