Ramsay's Kitchen Nightmares 3x4

1. - This week I'm in Derby for my biggest challenge yet,

2. a god awful Italian restaurant that's stuck in a timewarp.

3. It sounds like prices

4. that were in existence fucking 10, 15 years ago.

5. A truly miserable kitchen.

6. - I've been saying it for three days,

7. we haven't got a pot washer,

8. nobody's done a fucking thing about it.

9. - With appalling food.

10. The chicken's raw

11. and I don't wanna catch salmonella in fucking Derby.

12. Unless I can help her, new owner Daniella has

13. just spent half a million quid on a sinking ship.

14. - Well, we might as well close down now

15. and I can save my money.

16. - When La Gondola opened in 1968,

17. its Italian owners brought the glamour of Venice

18. to dowdy Derby,

19. and it instantly became the place to be seen.

20. - You couldn't get into this place

21. unless you booked two or three weeks in advance,

22. the place was packed.

23. It had wonderful atmosphere and it had a reputation

24. of being the best restaurant in Derby.

25. - Daniella celebrated her 21st birthday

26. at La Gondola, she even got married in the restaurant.

27. She loves it so much six months ago she bought the company,

28. but just what has she bought?

29. Cor, fucking hell.

30. Marbella in Derby, fucking hell, look at the size of it.

31. A 125 seater restaurant with a 21 bedroom hotel attached,

32. a big undertaking, especially if the state of the outside

33. is anything to go by.

34. Fuck me, even the gondola looks fucked.

35. Hello.

36. - Hello, good evening Mr. Ramsay.

37. - Gordon. - Gordon.

38. - And? - Daniella.

39. - Daniella, how are you?

40. - Fine.

41. - Good. - All the better

42. for seeing you, thank you for coming to our restaurant.

43. - Not at all.

44. God, it's a, it's like going back in time.

45. - It is, it's a bit of a time warp.

46. - And how old is it?

47. - Nearly 40 years old.

48. - Really?

49. Even the floorboards are. - I know, creaky.

50. - Creaking as well, fantastic.

51. Anyone under there?

52. - No, there's the wine cellar

53. where I keep my lovely old wine.

54. - Oh, okay. - So, yes,

55. so don't fall through it. - Fantastic.

56. It's Friday night and eight o'clock

57. and we can hear a few clinking plates in there,

58. but the place sounds empty.

59. How many's booked for dinner?

60. - Four.

61. - Four?

62. - Yes, a table of four, and that's all.

63. And that is our problem,

64. we have this beautiful restaurant

65. and it's empty most of the time.

66. - One question I've got to ask,

67. why the hell did you buy it

68. if you've never run a restaurant or a hotel before?

69. - Well, when my mother died and I went through a divorce,

70. it was the one thing one night that kept me going,

71. and I just thought that's what I'll do,

72. I'll buy La Gondola.

73. And all night long I just dreamt of this place.

74. - Oh, some customers coming now outside.

75. Okay.

76. Good night.

77. - Goodnight.

78. - Did you enjoy dinner?

79. - Yes thanks.

80. - Excellent.

81. Damn, I think they left their teeth on the table.

82. From its 70s chandeliers

83. to its plastic flowers, the restaurant

84. is well and truly past it.

85. It's like stepping back in time in there.

86. - It is, and I wondered whether

87. should we really decorate it

88. or wait 'til the fashion turns and come back to it?

89. I mean.

90. - Gosh!

91. But it will be too late

92. if the business goes down the pan first.

93. Everywhere you look,

94. it's like a flashback to the 70s,

95. even the food sounds, you know, that dated.

96. Smoked salmon, honeydew melon with port,

97. warm brie with a tomato tart.

98. The menu is massive, nearly 100 dishes,

99. and very few of them actually Italian.

100. I'd like to start with the spaghetti bolognese please.

101. - Spaghetti bolognese.

102. - Yeah, 'cause the food's Italian.

103. - Yes.

104. - So it's fresh spaghetti?

105. - It is.

106. - Thank you.

107. I've ordered the simplest starter on the menu,

108. but it seems to be taking a very long time.

109. - Get him on some fucking proper spaghetti now,

110. he's gonna get that fucking ancient shit that was in there.

111. Gareth, Gareth, Gareth, Gareth, you, you do it.

112. - I do apologise for the wait.

113. - Don't worry, problem in the kitchen?

114. - That pasta's been freshly cooked to order sir.

115. - Oh, lovely, nice.

116. Thank you.

117. He apologised about the wait

118. because, he said, the pasta was cooked to order.

119. Which you've only got four customers in the evening,

120. fucking right it's gonna be cooked to order.

121. Big portions, for a starter.

122. At £6.50 it's huge.

123. A mountain of spag bol

124. and a salmon main course to come, all for £6.50.

125. No wonder they're losing money.

126. - Right, Gareth, see if you can get a little tin

127. of lobster soup open without them seeing you.

128. - I've just seen something very dodgy,

129. they're silver serving the vegetables,

130. and even in 1999 silver service on vegetables

131. like that was 25 years too late.

132. The salmon is also massive and, like the restaurant,

133. a bewildering trip through time.

134. As the years have progressed,

135. they've just added more onto it.

136. Oh, fuck it, it's 1975, let's stick a mussel on there.

137. Oh, fuck it, it's 1980,

138. let's stick some mange tout on there.

139. Do you know what, it's 1985, ratatouille's in,

140. stick some ratatouille on there.

141. And it's 1990, welcome back the roast spud.

142. Quantity not quality, a classic 1970s mistake.

143. Surprise, surprise, Head Chef Steve Strawn,

144. started here in 1975.

145. I've never seen such massive portions in my entire life.

146. It doesn't need the prawns, it doesn't need the mussels.

147. - It's described on the menu as that

148. so I've gotta follow it through with what's on the menu.

149. - But, I mean, you've been here for that length of time,

150. you could change that

151. and just do a simple poached salmon dish without all that.

152. - I could do, I could do, yeah.

153. - You know, there's two ways in this industry,

154. you move with the times, or the times moves you.

155. And, unfortunately, you've been caught in a time warp.

156. In my experience, when a restaurant's been stuck in a rut

157. for so long rot starts setting in,

158. staff get really lazy, they start cutting corners,

159. and I really need to discover exactly what's going on here.

160. Today there's a 70th birthday party in the restaurant.

161. Functions are the life blood of La Gondola,

162. but there's not even enough

163. of those to stop it dying on its arse.

164. - At the moment for this year I've got nine weddings booked,

165. but really we should be aiming

166. for about 30 weddings a year

167. and then that would be very nice.

168. - With 25 covers it's a chance for me to see

169. how the kitchen copes

170. when they have more than four people through the door.

171. - I've done four of four.

172. - 10 minutes in, the kitchen's already in trouble.

173. They've run out of fresh tuna steaks.

174. - You know what you're going to have to do, plan B.

175. - Fuck knows what they're gonna do, it's called plan B.

176. Do you know about plan B?

177. - Plan B? - Plan B.

178. - Plan B, no. - No?

179. - No I don't.

180. - What's plan B when it's at home?

181. - Tins.

182. - Oh, tins, that's what it means, right.

183. Tinned tuna banged out on limp lettuce.

184. My gran would have been ashamed to have served that.

185. It doesn't feel like a kitchen, no energy, no excitement,

186. no passion really and sort of care and love for food.

187. Just get it the bowl and fuck off out of here.

188. Now there's a problem with the mains.

189. - Oh, sorry, it's no sauce on the salmon.

190. - Oh, no sauce, all, all plain?

191. - All plain, yeah.

192. - Where does it say plain on there?

193. So it doesn't.

194. Well, there's nothing I can do about that.

195. - Steve's straight on the phone

196. to Stella, the business manager.

197. - Yeah, but doesn't say plain on the menu does it?

198. We never serve it plain.

199. Chef's wrong again, never the office.

200. - Is it sorted?

201. - Not really.

202. Sort it out on Monday.

203. - It would've said lobster sauce

204. if you wanted lobster sauce.

205. - Stella cocked up the order for the lobster sauce

206. but instead of rolling up his sleeves up

207. and getting on with it, Steve picks a fight.

208. - Are you going upstairs Stella?

209. - Why?

210. - I just asked Daniella to come wash some pots, that's all.

211. - Why, haven't we got a pot washer?

212. - I've been saying it for three days,

213. we haven't got a pot washer

214. and nobody's done a fucking thing about it.

215. - Well, you're in charge of the kitchen Steve,

216. it's your department, you should see Dan.

217. - You wash your hands of it then.

218. - While they're all bickering,

219. the waiters are still serving the main course.

220. It's a shambles.

221. La Gondola wants to be a high class restaurant

222. and yet they're slopping out reheated catering rubbish.

223. Belgium apple pie.

224. What's Belgium about it?

225. Do you buy them in?

226. - Yeah.

227. - Oh, okay, right.

228. - Yeah, yeah.

229. - But from a chef to chef's point of view,

230. you know damn well an apple pie..

231. - Oh, yeah, exactly.

232. - We could do it with our eyes closed.

233. - Yeah, yeah, exactly.

234. - So are you telling me now that you're happier

235. to buy them in rather than make them?

236. - At this moment, no.

237. I'm happier to make them myself,

238. but I don't have the staff with the skills

239. or the time to do it.

240. - Oh, okay.

241. How long does it take to make an apple pie?

242. - Half an hour, 40 minutes.

243. - Microwaving?

244. - Yeah, yeah.

245. - What this guy needs is a rocket up his arse.

246. Well, this is a fucking doddle for you isn't it?

247. - Yep.

248. - It's not exactly ball breaking here is it?

249. - Has been in the past and it can be.

250. - No, stop going back, talk today.

251. It's almost like we're paying for your memories again.

252. - No, no, today is quiet.

253. - Right.

254. - Bring it back, I'll still handle it.

255. - Fucking hell, okay.

256. Daniella sank half a million quid

257. of her divorce settlement into La Gondola,

258. but last year alone it lost 75 grand.

259. If she doesn't open her eyes

260. to what's happening in her kitchen,

261. she'll be left with nothing but memories and debts.

262. Let's be brutally honest, you fell in love with the place

263. and you grew up in it,

264. and you had your 21st birthday party, had your wedding here,

265. and you have bought a fucking time bomb.

266. I've never seen a kitchen like that

267. that just has so little atmosphere, no banter,

268. no communication, no vibrant, let's get ready

269. for a great lunch.

270. It was turkey going in, cooked the day before, reheated.

271. - I'm horrified that we had that.

272. You're telling me a discerning customer

273. cannot tell the difference.

274. - Yeah, but I think what we've really got to pick up on

275. and wake up on is the fact that your chef

276. can lose his self esteem by serving that shit.

277. They've carved a very comfortable niche out for themselves

278. and they've made a really comfortable bed to lie in,

279. and unfortunately you're paying the price for that.

280. I'm pretty pissed off, you know that?

281. I'm not happy,

282. because what I saw yesterday, across the board,

283. I thought was a fucking disgrace.

284. La Gondola in Derby.

285. At first I thought this restaurant's problem was

286. that it was stuck in a time warp,

287. but it goes far deeper than that.

288. It's 10 o'clock and Head Chef, Steve,

289. and his number two, Gareth,

290. are only just rolling up for work.

291. You wouldn't get away with that in my kitchen,

292. especially as last year the restaurant lost 75 grand.

293. These guys just don't seem to be interested

294. in turning the place around.

295. How much has the restaurant taken this week, barely.

296. - Yeah.

297. - 500 quid, yeah?

298. The salaries alone in the kitchen are 1000 pounds.

299. If the restaurant didn't have these functions

300. that are drip feeding into this establishment.

301. You wouldn't have a job.

302. I personally want to put a fucking rocket up

303. everyone's arse in here today

304. to really make them understand

305. what you should be doing and not bickering

306. and festering on fucking memories from 20 years ago.

307. That means fuck all.

308. It's Sunday lunchtime

309. and there are three diners at La Gondola.

310. When there isn't a function on,

311. well, nothing much happens in this kitchen.

312. - Right, we are away?

313. - We're away.

314. Chef's away as well, he's been away for 30 fucking years.

315. Mains away chef please.

316. - Not quite ready yet.

317. Not quite ready.

318. - This kitchen is like a retirement home.

319. So how many evenings do you work a week?

320. - Three.

321. - Three to four, depends on the business really,

322. you know, just play it by ear.

323. It varies.

324. - Yeah, what a bizarre set-up.

325. Good afternoon.

326. - Good afternoon.

327. - Welcome back.

328. - Thank you.

329. - Now, you've been coming for?

330. - 36 years.

331. - 36 years?

332. - Yes.

333. - Yes.

334. - Wow, amazing.

335. So you are the asset?

336. - Yes.

337. - So, if the food was to change you wouldn't come back?

338. - No.

339. - No.

340. What have you got?

341. You've got Minestrone soup.

342. Minestrone soup.

343. - Yes.

344. - But La Gondola are goin have

345. to risk losing their three regular diners

346. because this is a terrible environment

347. for an aspiring young chef.

348. Number two, Gareth, is only 19 but he's already given up.

349. It must be soul destroying

350. when the business is so quiet, no?

351. Motivation-wise, no?

352. - It's boring.

353. - Yeah, very boring.

354. - When it's quiet you're just, like,

355. clock watching until it's 10 o'clock so you can go,

356. because you can't go early in case someone does come.

357. - No.

358. - So it's just,

359. you're just clock watching all the time and.

360. - Yeah.

361. I've only seen one person in this kitchen

362. with any real drive or ambition,

363. and that's 17 year old apprentice Danny Holborn.

364. Are you alright Danny boy?

365. You're doing a fucking good job.

366. - Yeah, yeah, my pleasure.

367. - That's where it all started, you know that?

368. I've been in there.

369. Lonely place in amongst all those bubbles.

370. But, trust me, if you get your shit together there

371. it goes from bubbles on top of the sink

372. to bubbles in glasses of champagne.

373. Would you like a glass of champagne?

374. - I'm not old enough.

375. - Fuck it, we'll sneak it in the fridge.

376. - Okay then.

377. - Yeah?

378. - Yeah.

379. - Young chefs need encouragement,

380. but discipline is high on Steve's list of priorities.

381. - I don't stand any nonsense.

382. - You don't stand any nonsense?

383. - No, and if these don't make it they go.

384. I've told them all.

385. Out, I'm not standing for nothing.

386. This one might not last the week.

387. - Oh, really?

388. What for?

389. - Yesterday, yesterday was very close.

390. I don't hang around with one warning and two warnings.

391. - No?

392. - They're out the fucking back door mate, simple as that.

393. - So what you're saying is you're worse than me?

394. - No, what I'm saying is I don't like shit.

395. - Yeah.

396. - Out they go, isn't that right Gareth?

397. If you're no good you walk.

398. - Steve thinks he can talk the talk,

399. but can he really walk the walk?

400. It's time I checked out his store cupboard.

401. Cor, fucking hell.

402. Fucking evidence.

403. So, I mean, it looks like fish food doesn't it, huh?

404. And it smells fucking disgusting.

405. There you go, half a container of plastic Minestrone soup.

406. Right.

407. Now, we've seen it all, Smash.

408. What in the fuck a chef does with that I don't know.

409. The new owner Daniella wants La Gondola

410. to be an authentic Italian restaurant,

411. and yet she's completely unaware

412. of what's happening in her own kitchen.

413. The minestrone soup is quite a hallmark.

414. - It is, it's very good, it's excellent,

415. almost as good as my mother's.

416. Yeah, it's great.

417. - Why do you buy it in Steve?

418. - I don't buy it in.

419. I make it myself.

420. - So the containers of bought in minestrone soup

421. and the invoices here.

422. - What we do, we'd mix that 50/50.

423. We'll sort of give half and half really.

424. It, it seems to be.

425. - I'm not clear,

426. what do you mean, two bowls, one of plastic and one?

427. - No, no, no, no, no, no.

428. We'd make half up with part packet

429. and then put fresh into it as well.

430. - Steve's penny pinching by bulking up

431. the fresh soup with powdered,

432. but the prices are so out of date on the menu,

433. they're haemorrhaging money on a daily basis.

434. The cost of the lamb, nothing more, just the lamb cutlets.

435. - Yeah.

436. - That whole dish, okay, should be on the menu at £16.50.

437. - Right.

438. - You're selling it at £10.90.

439. And the scary thing is, Steve,

440. that you don't know that every time we sell that lamb.

441. - Yeah.

442. - We're losing five quid.

443. - Yeah, yeah.

444. - And if we had a table of four in today

445. and they walked in that door,

446. I swear to god it would be a lot easier

447. to fucking stop them at the door

448. and say there's your £5 and fuck off.

449. - Well, we might as well close down now

450. and I can save my money.

451. You know, I'm guided by people who've been here for years

452. and they're telling me they can make money out of that menu.

453. - But you were here in place,

454. in position as the manager

455. when this was put together, sorry, I'm sorry.

456. - Ah, yeah, so you can blame me all you like,

457. but it's my money Steve, not yours.

458. - Yes I know, yes I know it's your money.

459. Let's carry on, let's put a structure in place.

460. - What about your daughter's party?

461. - Just a minute, just a minute.

462. Let's put a structure.

463. - £10 per room, £10 per meal.

464. Where was the money, where, where was the money?

465. - Listen, it's my restaurant, and all I needed to do

466. was cover costs, all right? - Where was the money on that?

467. - And I did more than cover costs on that.

468. - It's Stella who does all this, not us.

469. Stella does this.

470. - Don't go off saying this that and the other.

471. You could be out of a job in a month's time.

472. - No one is taking responsibility

473. for La Gondola's problems, everyone just blames each other.

474. I look at you and I get really nervous,

475. because I think you're the kind of cook

476. that's just gonna fuck off out of here, you know that?

477. I think you're going to get upset one day,

478. after listening to the way you spoke to the owner,

479. if that was me I would have sacked you,

480. and my worry is you're so determined

481. to fucking work in this industry,

482. you need to get excited, you need to start cooking properly.

483. I've got to get these guys out of this god awful kitchen

484. and try and lift their morale,

485. so I'm taking them to see one

486. of Derby's most successful businesses.

487. Yeah, Gareth, you drive.

488. We're gonna look at some history.

489. Right, let's go and look at something that's beautiful,

490. something that's moved with time.

491. A Rolls Royce, 1933.

492. Look at it, beautiful.

493. Now, the next one is something quite interesting

494. because this was made in 1979.

495. Look at it, a bit of history.

496. Rolls Royce didn't sit still, yeah,

497. and get moved by the times,

498. they decided to move ahead of the times, the Phantom.

499. What's it like in there Danny?

500. - It's nice and comfy.

501. - Nice and comfy?

502. - It looks like I mean business.

503. - Steve, see what I'm trying to say?

504. They've moved on.

505. They haven't just stood there and sort

506. of expected Rolls Royce to sell.

507. And, unfortunately, big boy,

508. when I first saw your food,

509. I felt like I was stepping in a time capsule.

510. - Yeah, I get your point, it's marvellous,

511. it's marvellous, absolutely.

512. - I know a chef who's got one of these, you know that?

513. And you're thinking, Gareth, what shall I do,

514. rob a bank or work hard?

515. - Rob a bank.

516. - Rob a bank?

517. Fucking hell, bollocks.

518. Shall we nip round and see your mum Danny?

519. The engine that powers any successful restaurant

520. is its kitchen, and like Rolls Royce,

521. La Gondola is gonna have to create its own modern classics.

522. I'm starting with the lunch menu.

523. What's the secret behind any good Italian restaurant?

524. - Pasta.

525. - Pasta, exactly.

526. When was the last time you made fresh pasta?

527. - Never have.

528. - Here we go, you're making it,

529. I'm just gonna tell you how to make it.

530. So make a well in the centre.

531. I'm keeping it simple so the chefs have got time

532. to get up to speed.

533. Out goes the old two course lunch menu for £6.50,

534. in comes a fresh pasta main with a salad

535. and a glass of wine for £8.95.

536. See the colour is starting to change now

537. because the saffron's working on that.

538. Fresh pasta is the hallmark

539. of an authentic Italian restaurant,

540. its simplicity also makes it a money-spinner.

541. Far cheaper than those expensive lamb specials.

542. See the colour of it, all of it?

543. Ricotta in?

544. And I want you to taste it as you're doing it.

545. Now, okay, watch.

546. Yeah, like a parcel, exactly, look.

547. Fold it over, nip all the air out.

548. Little finger, over, left to right, right to left,

549. use your thumb and push.

550. Tortellini, who'd like a go?

551. Yeah, of course you can have a go, here we go.

552. We've only been making pasta for 10 minutes

553. and already the young chefs look

554. like they're enjoying themselves.

555. I've finally injected some passion into this kitchen.

556. Good.

557. And that you've just done, that was 10 minutes ago,

558. that was your first one.

559. Yeah, hey, no, but that's your first,

560. you've never made pasta

561. and now you've made your first ever Tortellini.

562. That's very good.

563. I've asked Danny, the apprentice,

564. to come up with a couple of salads for the new menu.

565. - Right, what I've done is I've put,

566. like, tomato and that in the mixing bowl.

567. - Good.

568. - And then with the shallots and then you put like this,

569. like the salt and vinegar stuff over it.

570. - Good.

571. - And I've already mixed.

572. - Okay, have a little taste, eat with me.

573. And this one is a?

574. - It is rocket and Parmesan cheese.

575. - That's lovely.

576. But La Gondola's problems aren't just in the kitchen.

577. To help me re-launch this sinking ship,

578. I've called in the boss of the company

579. that does all my restaurant PR, Jo Barnes.

580. What do you reckon?

581. - Well, it certainly makes a first impression.

582. - Up the creaky stairs.

583. - Wow.

584. - Hi Dan. - Hello.

585. - Amazing chandelier.

586. - And look at the dance floor

587. and just how many heels have been dancing on this.

588. - [Jo] And you can kind of see El Becko doing a special.

589. - Yeah.

590. - On, you know, interiors frozen in time.

591. - Yeah.

592. Yeah, and do you think there's a sellable asset here?

593. Do you think you could sell this restaurant?

594. My first feelings when I come in,

595. and I don't mean to be negative, are start all over again.

596. This place badly needs refurbishment.

597. You could refurb it, you could call it a new name

598. and start over and really re-launch it.

599. However, being real.

600. - They haven't got the money.

601. - Fine.

602. - No.

603. - What it does have is a tremendous amount

604. of authenticity and kind of kitschy appeal.

605. - Yeah.

606. - And I love the sort of, you know, the Doric columns

607. and the dance floor, and I suppose you've gotta work

608. with what you've got.

609. - Daniella and her business manager Stella

610. need Jo's help, because so far their marketing efforts

611. have hardly set Derby alight.

612. - I can't even find it on here.

613. - It's supposed to be

614. under restaurants, under continental.

615. - Oh, there we go.

616. Jesus Christ!

617. So we go past all these relaxing massage

618. and all these whore houses

619. and you come down here and then you get

620. "La Gondola, try our new menus.

621. "Bookings now being taken."

622. I mean, you know, you've missed it.

623. - I think what you've got to do is identify

624. what your real strengths are here,

625. and that's the family run business,

626. that's the great space you've got with the dance floor,

627. and make them into selling points.

628. You've got to have a punchy message

629. with which you can appeal to your potential customers.

630. - Now the restaurant reputation's disappeared,

631. yet you've got.

632. - The reputation hasn't disappeared, the problem is

633. that people have forgotten about La Gondola.

634. It hasn't got a bad reputation, definitely not.

635. Nine times.

636. - So this is a good reputation?

637. See, again, you're living in the past.

638. - Medium, medium.

639. - I feel you're not being honest with yourself.

640. It has a shit reputation.

641. - It hasn't.

642. - I'm telling you it has.

643. - So you've been to Derby

644. and you've had a word with all of the customers?

645. - Yeah, no, hold on a minute.

646. - And none of them are happy?

647. - All of the customers?

648. There are no customers, the place is empty.

649. - So you're telling me that the people

650. who put adverts in the paper thanking us

651. for a superb wedding, etcetera.

652. - You're missing my point.

653. - None of them are happy?

654. - If you just listen to what I'm trying to tell you,

655. it may make sense in a minute.

656. The add-ons

657. from having a successful restaurant is phenomenal.

658. We haven't got that reputation any longer.

659. The business is on its arse,

660. and the functions over the last 10 years have depleted.

661. Accept it, there is no reputation at La Gondola.

662. And if you're going to stand there

663. and tell me it's a good place

664. when the chef buys in minestrone soup

665. No chance.

666. We need to spread the word around Derby

667. that La Gondola is changing.

668. So I've told Stella to get on the phone

669. and round up members of the city's business community

670. for a special lunch.

671. A great way to get the message out

672. and a chance to see if Steve can lead his team.

673. - My father used to come here for business lunches

674. about 25 years ago, right.

675. But in recent times I have to say it's not a place

676. that I would have come to.

677. - The idea of this lunch today

678. is to get them in and out in 45 minutes.

679. We've banished silver service to speed up the waiters,

680. but can Steve run his kitchen fast enough to keep up?

681. - Whether we're busy, quiet, makes no difference to me.

682. I only know one way and that's the way I do it.

683. - Yeah, are you ready to roll with this, yeah?

684. - Yeah.

685. - Good man.

686. This is the exciting part of the day, yeah?

687. Okay, let's see, I want you to clean round the plates.

688. - Yeah.

689. - Be a good boy, let's go.

690. - One fritatta, one bruchetta, one Tagliatelle.

691. - Nice.

692. The new pasta dishes I've devised are hitting the spot.

693. - Table three sends their compliments.

694. - That's a first.

695. - Quality, yeah, not bad.

696. Very good price as well, but a little bit slow coming out,

697. just a little bit slow

698. when people are having a business lunch.

699. - But, once again,

700. the lack of organisation has dropped the kitchen in it.

701. Jesus Chris.

702. Come on guys there's gotta be a system

703. in here somewhere.

704. Steve?

705. If you're confused, yeah, let me know

706. and I'll help you out, yeah?

707. - Okay.

708. - 'Cause it's gone all quiet, you see?

709. You're not leading like a head chef, do you understand?

710. Where all these three guys, including Danny,

711. is coming together at the same time.

712. But they've gotta take your direction, you know that?

713. - Yes.

714. - Outside in the restaurant

715. there are lots of customers waiting,

716. but all the orders have become mixed up.

717. You sent table four, yeah?

718. Three Tagliatelle, one gnocchi, one Bruchetta.

719. - Yeah.

720. - They've sent them, they've just come back,

721. they're on coffee, you've already sent their main course.

722. And now a whole table has got the wrong dishes.

723. Start again, anyway, it's gone stone cold.

724. What about the starters on table eight?

725. - They've had it already. - They've had them?

726. Why is it not crossed off Steve?

727. Fucking, no wonder the kitchen's confused.

728. Its so important that.

729. If you've sent the starters why aren't you crossing it off?

730. - Right, table two for starters, yeah, this is.

731. - That was just 35 covers.

732. I'm planning to completely re-launch the restaurant

733. in only a couple of days' time

734. with double the number of customers.

735. I'm starting to wonder if Steve really is up to it.

736. What has come out of today's lunch,

737. you know that, is how everyone

738. just works on their own, you know that?

739. - Yeah.

740. - I've seen no fucking team spirit here whatsoever.

741. - No, no.

742. - No understanding, no co-ordination

743. and bringing these guys together

744. has been a fucking nightmare.

745. - I know.

746. - Fucking hell, I tell you, I'm finding it hard,

747. I'm finding it really fucking hard.

748. Because it's not about teaching an old boy new tricks,

749. it's about getting the old boy to wake up

750. and stop being a lazy bastard.

751. A simple risotto, bruschetta, fritatta, tagliatelle

752. of chicken and they're still in the shit.

753. La Gondola is up the creek without a paddle.

754. The kitchen's getting by with bought-in apple pies,

755. and the staff don't pull together.

756. - I never know which way you have it you poof.

757. - In less than 48 hours,

758. new owner Daniella is re-launching the restaurant.

759. - I woke up at five o'clock this morning.

760. Don't often swear, but I was shit scared.

761. - The trouble is Daniella's Head Chef

762. has been treading water, opening a tin of tuna

763. or a packet of powdered soup.

764. I want to redesign the menu for the re-launch,

765. but what can Steve actually cook?

766. I've asked him to prepare me a dish fresh ingredients only.

767. So, what's in there, butter?

768. - We've got butter.

769. - Red onions.

770. - Red onions, a little bit of olive oil.

771. - Yeah.

772. - Fennel, fresh fennel,

773. and just a little bit of orange zest.

774. Flour.

775. - And where did this idea come from?

776. - When I was a commis we used to do it,

777. when I worked down in Oxford.

778. - So 35 years ago?

779. - Quite a long time, yeah, yeah.

780. - Steve is cooking me a dish

781. of rustic Italian trout.

782. - That smells gorgeous.

783. And then we can dress it up.

784. - I was a little bit miffed

785. when you were frying the trout,

786. the fact you hadn't taken the scales off.

787. - Right.

788. - So when I've got to eat this

789. with a pile of shit in my mouth.

790. Why didn't you scale the fish?

791. - Sorry, just time it was.

792. - Time?

793. - Yeah.

794. - It looks like you forgot.

795. I think that's pretty dismal, for a 51 year old chef

796. to produce that pile of shit I'm fucking gobsmacked.

797. The scales are on there, it's all on the roof of my mouth,

798. the fucking alcohol's not burnt off,

799. it's, fucking hell Steve.

800. After Steve's dismal effort,

801. I want to find out if the other chefs can do any better.

802. Tuna's very tasty.

803. You don't need that sauce.

804. For me, you've just fucked that dish

805. by putting that glue on there.

806. That sort of gallopy, stodgy wallpaper paste that,

807. in fact I'd offer that to Daniella

808. to fucking plaster the front of La Gondola, you know that,

809. 'cause that looks like a pile of shit there as well.

810. What's that, what's that in there?

811. - Inside?

812. - Yeah.

813. Oh, the, the chicken's inside?

814. - Yeah.

815. - Is this a Polish dish?

816. - No, no.

817. - The chicken's raw.

818. - Raw.

819. - Now unfortunately I can't afford

820. to fuck off and die right now,

821. and I don't want to catch Salmonella in fucking Derby,

822. so put that straight in the bin, yeah?

823. I've been poisoned once before

824. and it's not gonna fucking happen again.

825. It's so scary, we really are in trouble here.

826. I've never sent this message out before in a restaurant,

827. I'd tell them fucking move your arse, get on with it,

828. otherwise you're out.

829. But I'm gonna tell you guys to stop and give up,

830. don't fight it if you don't want to change.

831. And when that change comes in,

832. be prepared to work fucking hard.

833. We've got to get rid of all this crap.

834. We can't carry 80, 89 dishes.

835. What's it like when this man's off for the night

836. and you've got 25 booked?

837. It must be mad, no?

838. When you cook like that do you actually think

839. that you're fit enough to call yourself a chef

840. if you're defrosting things and deep frying mushrooms?

841. - No.

842. - And is it important for you to cook

843. or are you really seriously interested

844. in staying the way you are?

845. - Cook.

846. - You are, you, you definitely wanna cook?

847. Yeah, away.

848. There's nothing complicated in a this, you know that?

849. The only option is to go right back to basics.

850. I've devised a new dinner menu

851. that's so simple hopefully it's foolproof.

852. A light gnocchi with salmon and tarragon.

853. And a simple tomato and mozzarella risotto.

854. That tomato it's just a little bit too thick.

855. - Too thick, yeah.

856. - Even this kitchen surely can't cock these dishes up.

857. Fresh fragrant mix, stand up please Steve.

858. Thank you.

859. Gareth, it's really hard for you to understand at 19

860. how modern we're trying to put the approach.

861. - Sure.

862. - Yeah?

863. Nothing's coming out of a fucking packet,

864. nothing's coming out underneath,

865. cooked fucking three days ago,

866. it's just clean, fresh,

867. and just think back to that Phantom, that Roller.

868. Is it worth getting out of bed in the morning?

869. - Yeah.

870. - Yes, fucking right it is.

871. Real easy, okay, yeah.

872. So it doesn't all stick.

873. Danny's never been given his own section,

874. so I'm going to see how he does with the vegetables.

875. You've got to look after them, you know that,

876. almost as if you're sort of in love with them.

877. - Yes Gordon.

878. - Well, beautiful

879. - It's warm ain't it?

880. - It's very warm isn't it?

881. Huh, welcome to the real world of the kitchen big boy,

882. you're sweating. - Yeah.

883. - That looks cool.

884. - First time.

885. - Is it the first time you've sweated?

886. - In the kitchen, yeah.

887. - Good man.

888. Yeah, so have you done the peppers, yeah?

889. The aubergine?

890. The butternut squash? - Yes.

891. - And now, all of a sudden, big boy,

892. over the last couple of hours, yes,

893. you've been running the vegetable section.

894. Move your arse.

895. We now have a new contemporary menu for the re-launch.

896. Time to chuck out the chintz.

897. Stella, let me ask you something.

898. You're sat, just come and touch this a minute

899. and close your eyes and just touch it.

900. - Close my eyes and touch it?

901. - Yeah.

902. - Horrible.

903. - Fucking disgusting.

904. Dirty, grubby, smelly, plastic flowers, yeah?

905. The clutter on the tables, Martin,

906. looks like it's come out of the fucking pound shop.

907. You know, you're like an old fucking woman

908. that just won't throw anything away.

909. Get rid of it.

910. - It's going tonight.

911. - Good.

912. It's like going to a, an airport lounge

913. and looking at one of the chapels of rest.

914. It's the kind of thing you'd see in there

915. when you sort of sit down and grieve.

916. I mean, I'm sorry, but they are fucking awful.

917. Catch, get hold of them all and lob them in the skip, yeah?

918. - Pleasure.

919. - Good man.

920. Already, I feel like, fucking hell,

921. I've got rid of my granny's pants, they're off,

922. they're no longer up here,

923. I'm starting to think about wearing a nice sexy pair

924. of knickers, because I've just seen

925. the white tablecloth go down.

926. That's how I feel in here.

927. - It looks clean and fresh.

928. - Yeah, would you wear knickers up to there Stella?

929. - Oh, don't start Gordon.

930. Stick to the restaurant.

931. - I'm just asking.

932. Would you wear a pair of woolly knickers up to here?

933. - No, no, I wouldn't.

934. - No, so get rid of the flowers.

935. But I have discovered one thing

936. from the past worth hanging onto.

937. - This is from the old classic menu we used to have.

938. Yeah.

939. - All done on the table?

940. - All done on the table.

941. - And now you've stopped it because it's on the old menu?

942. - Yeah, I mean, at one time Saturday nights used

943. to be just one person just do the cooking all night.

944. - So you're taking that to, what, lightly brown?

945. - Just nice and golden brown.

946. - I've asked Martin for a demo

947. because I think that flambés are due a comeback.

948. Jesus Christ!

949. Do you miss this?

950. - Oh, yeah.

951. - You're so fucking good at it.

952. - Yes, I hope so.

953. I try and do my best anyway.

954. - This should be the hallmark of the restaurant this.

955. This is this is art.

956. Thank you.

957. - My pleasure.

958. - Christ almighty!

959. If they taste as good as they look,

960. they're going back on the menu.

961. They're to die for.

962. They are fucking delicious.

963. Who needs a wine list

964. when you can get pissed on the dessert?

965. It's the day of the re-launch.

966. As well as bringing back the flambés,

967. I've decided to resurrect La Gondola's dance floor.

968. A house band is booked

969. and the waiting staff finally look the part.

970. There will be 70 covers in tonight,

971. double the number of diners

972. that we had in for the business lunch.

973. It's a real test for the kitchen,

974. they're really gonna have to pull together

975. if they want to carry it off.

976. I've put Danny in charge of the staff dinner.

977. They don't normally have them here

978. but they're a great way to build team spirit.

979. The most important thing about staff dinner, big boy,

980. is clearing out the fridge, yes?

981. So we've got to move now, big boy,

982. we've got 10 minutes to get this ready, yes?

983. Steve, I think he could really take his own little sort

984. of world there doing these staff lunches and that,

985. you know that, and it'll give him

986. that little vote of confidence.

987. - Yeah, why not?

988. - Unfortunately, Steve doesn't seem very confident.

989. With only an hour until the first guests arrive I'm worried.

990. You're running round getting all your plates

991. and bits and bobs,

992. but I saw that a week ago, you're all boxed off.

993. - No, I was intending to go round in the morning

994. and just make sure everybody knows what's going on tonight

995. and what I need, and when I show up for it,

996. what I want when I want it.

997. - Yeah, but it's all very well, it's in your mind,

998. but the problem is that, you know.

999. - Yeah, like I'm saying, I'm gonna talk to them now.

1000. - It's sort of, you know. - Yeah.

1001. - Offloading it and getting them to understand, yeah?

1002. - Yeah, sure.

1003. There's a feeling there

1004. but I'm not sure if it's nervousness or not.

1005. I get stressed as much as anybody else,

1006. I'm only, I'm only human, so.

1007. Maybe I get stressed more than anybody else, I don't know.

1008. - Oh, the risotto's gorgeous.

1009. Congratulations Daniel, that's really good.

1010. - Steve, you're not eating?

1011. - Well, I've had two meals since last Friday.

1012. - You've had two meals since last Friday?

1013. - Yeah, I'm just off it at the moment.

1014. - Thank you.

1015. I'm really worried about Steve, he seems very nervous.

1016. The menus we've got, yeah?

1017. Everything is in place and ready to roll,

1018. but at the last minute Steve bottles it.

1019. Right, listen.

1020. I'm running the hotplate tonight.

1021. I shouldn't really be running the hotplate,

1022. but Steve's asked if I'd run the hotplate

1023. to make sure that we get up to speed, yeah?

1024. Communication, chemistry, understanding, yeah?

1025. Working for each other, yeah?

1026. Gareth, yeah, what are we going to do tonight

1027. if we get flustered and frustrated,

1028. what are you going to do?

1029. - Ask for help.

1030. - Yeah, and take it out on your what?

1031. - Pasta.

1032. - That's right, you take it out on your pasta, not Daniella.

1033. Enjoy it, smile, I'll be behind you every ounce of the way.

1034. Smile.

1035. Order on.

1036. One tortellini, one parma ham with figs,

1037. one antipasto, one linguini.

1038. Main course, one gnocchi, one tuna, one salmon, one lamb.

1039. Not one fucking answer.

1040. Yes chef.

1041. - Yes chef.

1042. - Thank you, good boy.

1043. I shouldn't be doing this.

1044. Steve needs to be able to run his kitchen properly himself,

1045. so I'm only gonna get him started.

1046. So two minutes on the hotplate, one gnocchi,

1047. one tuna, one salmon, one lamb.

1048. Steve, tomorrow you're on your own,

1049. and I just wish that you implemented a system

1050. like this 10 years ago, big boy, you know that?

1051. - I do.

1052. - So it wouldn't be so fucking hard now at the age of 51.

1053. - Yeah.

1054. - Thank you, 14, go.

1055. Right, Gareth, watch the cooking on the pasta please, yes?

1056. Next time I'm gonna be down on your bollocks.

1057. Two lamb, one rib-eye, one tuna.

1058. - Yes chef.

1059. - Yeah, nicely, put it on that plate nicely,

1060. as if you're in love with it, yeah?

1061. Fresh tarragon on the top.

1062. Come on.

1063. How does it feel to be cooking normally?

1064. No, no, no.

1065. - Different, different.

1066. - Yeah, no, no, no, no, I didn't ask that.

1067. - It's exciting.

1068. Once we get in the system it'll be good.

1069. - Yeah, it's the only way Steve.

1070. - Yeah.

1071. - Yeah?

1072. I can stay here and run this,

1073. but you're fucking benefiting jack shit mate.

1074. - True enough.

1075. - Yeah, you're gonna have to do it yourself now,

1076. you know that?

1077. - Yeah.

1078. - Run your kitchen, and run your team.

1079. - Yes chef.

1080. - Okay, and if I hear you silent

1081. and not talking to them, yeah?

1082. Hey, I'm gonna ram that fork up your ass.

1083. - Nice, it's a big one. - Yeah.

1084. Fuckin' right.

1085. For the first time in 15 years,

1086. Martin's back cooking up a storm with the flambé.

1087. Good music, efficient and stylish table service,

1088. at last La Gondola is swinging again.

1089. - Three lamb, two rib-eyes, one tuna.

1090. Hannah, can you send Joanna in please.

1091. Don't understand what all these arrows mean.

1092. - So, two medium, one well done.

1093. - That's a medium is it?

1094. - Your first main course is three lamb.

1095. They haven't even started clearing the starters yet, okay?

1096. Thank you.

1097. As the atmosphere in the restaurant hots up,

1098. the kitchen is going into slow motion.

1099. No.

1100. Cross it off.

1101. What about that other table of four here?

1102. Two rib-eye, one tuna, one salmon.

1103. - Okay.

1104. - You've gone all quiet again.

1105. - Where's that salad, ready?

1106. Right, tuna.

1107. - When the kitchen does get the food out,

1108. it's going down a treat.

1109. I've never seen a lady clean her plate so quickly

1110. in my life.

1111. It's like taking a portable dishwasher out for dinner.

1112. - It's been beautiful, really, really nice

1113. to enjoy authentic Italian cooking, very nice.

1114. - If they, if they stand up to the reputation

1115. that they've set tonight we'll come back.

1116. - The new menu has been a success,

1117. but since I handed in the hotplate Steve's struggled,

1118. and he's only got through it by the skin of his teeth.

1119. Come on Steve, last table.

1120. Fuckin' hell, right, Gareth!

1121. Come in here, Danny, turn off the stoves.

1122. Right, how was that for you, truthfully?

1123. - Coulda been better.

1124. Coulda been better.

1125. Coulda been more smoother, more communication.

1126. - Yeah, who can that communication come from, Steve?

1127. - Me.

1128. - Hallelujah.

1129. It's been a bloody hard week

1130. but I think we've shown the staff

1131. that the old Gondola has life in her yet.

1132. Fucking hell, £2,000 in one night,

1133. the restaurant alone last week took 500 quid.

1134. Now, there's the insight to what this place is capable

1135. of doing and it's only down to one thing, what is it Steve?

1136. Hard work, that's all, hard work.

1137. This kitchen was so far behind the times

1138. even I considered throwing the towel in.

1139. We struggled through a birthday function

1140. and then a business lunch.

1141. But the dinner dance showed how La Gondola

1142. can get the good times back.

1143. I've implemented a new menu and a new ethos in the kitchen,

1144. but can they really build on the momentum

1145. when I'm not there to hold their hands?

1146. Danny the apprentice does have the makings of a good chef.

1147. You've seen over the week that you can cook the staff food.

1148. It's a really nice thing for you to do once a day?

1149. - I said to them the other day, I said I want to cook,

1150. I don't wanna be like stuck on the pots and that.

1151. - No, you're too good for that.

1152. Gareth also has a chance of making it, if he knuckles down.

1153. - You've learnt me more stuff than he has in three years.

1154. - There's someone deep down inside there

1155. that's tucked away that's dying to learn,

1156. that wants to come out.

1157. So fucking get it out.

1158. But Steve still worries me.

1159. I think you've fucking forgotten the word cooking,

1160. passion, exciting.

1161. - Yeah I have, you're damn right.

1162. It's been switched off for a long time.

1163. It's all been rusted up

1164. and this week's loosened enough,

1165. it's just gonna keep on loosenin' up now I think.

1166. I'm not gonna quit on it,

1167. I'm going to give it my fucking best.

1168. You see if I don't.

1169. Come back.

1170. - Fuck me, I'll be back.

1171. - Yeah, you come back.

1172. - Whether or not you'll be here when I get back

1173. will be a different matter.

1174. Last summer I spent a week at La Gondola in Derby,

1175. my most testing kitchen nightmare.

1176. A restaurant 30 years out of date.

1177. It's like stepping back in time in there.

1178. - It is, and I wondered whether,

1179. should we really decorate it or wait 'til the fashion turns.

1180. - No customers.

1181. It has a shit reputation.

1182. And one of the worst Head Chefs I've ever met.

1183. For a 51 year old chef to produce that kind of shit,

1184. I'm fucking gobsmacked.

1185. But somehow I managed to get the place swinging again.

1186. Four months later I'm back.

1187. At least someone's in the gondola.

1188. Who on earth is that in there, God, okay.

1189. How are you?

1190. - Fine. - Good.

1191. Quick kiss, what's the matter?

1192. - Well, I'd have done my hair and got changed.

1193. - You don't need to do that for me.

1194. Steve, he's obviously getting ready for dinner.

1195. - Steve left.

1196. He walked out, he walked out,

1197. gave me a week's notice as soon as you left.

1198. - The minute I left, he walked out?

1199. - He didn't have the energy, thought about it

1200. and he was out of here.

1201. - Didn't have the energy?

1202. - I begged him to stay

1203. but he said no his mind was made up

1204. so I think he's got a job in a pub now.

1205. - Job in a pub.

1206. - Yes.

1207. - Servin' what kind of food?

1208. - Well, what the general manager calls ding-ding food.

1209. You put it in a microwave and out it comes.

1210. - Yeah, in a way I'm not that upset,

1211. because if he wasn't prepared to pull on the rope

1212. and actually help get the place back.

1213. Who's in there now, who's the chef?

1214. - Oh, you'll have to see.

1215. This man saved my life.

1216. - Hello Wayne, how are you? - Hi, not to bad at all.

1217. - Yeah, Gordon, nice to see you, excellent.

1218. So the style of menu, what is the style of menu?

1219. - Style of menu, I've only arrived yesterday so.

1220. - So we've had no.

1221. Sorry, excuse me, you've had no chef since?

1222. - No, no, no.

1223. I did experiment with at least four other chefs.

1224. I went through one who was feng shui

1225. who would only cook in a certain style.

1226. - Feng shui chef?

1227. - Feng shui, yeah.

1228. - Even Wayne's pissin' himself.

1229. - Did research 'round because.

1230. - It turns out Daniella road tested

1231. several head chefs after Steve jumped ship.

1232. At least she's trying not to make the same mistake twice.

1233. - Friday, we had about 20.

1234. - But where's Gareth?

1235. He still here?

1236. - No, well, he finished up yesterday.

1237. - He's been poached by Steve

1238. to go and work in a pub

1239. when he can work here but the money

1240. was too much of a temptation, I'm afraid.

1241. - Yeah, that's shockin'.

1242. I'm pissed off that Gareth didn't stick it out,

1243. but I think a clean slate

1244. is the only way forward for Daniella.

1245. Yeah, and someone's trying to constantly pullin' the wool

1246. over this woman's eyes.

1247. - Absolutely.

1248. - And unfortunately because she's so nice

1249. and so gentle, everybody was takin' the piss out of her

1250. and was becoming a laughing stock.

1251. - Absolutely.

1252. - Now she's got the bull by the horns,

1253. she's shook it,

1254. and she's got rid of the fucking cobwebs.

1255. Please tell me Danny's here.

1256. - He's workin' tonight.

1257. - Okay.

1258. And, Danny, have you missed me?

1259. - Yes I have.

1260. - I've missed you too as well,

1261. you know that, big man.

1262. - Yes big man.

1263. - Little fucker.

1264. Danny's responded to my encouragement

1265. and taken up new responsibilities.

1266. - Danny, can ya get the cream please, Danny!

1267. - Perhaps he and Wayne are the dynamic duo

1268. that will give La Gondola the stability

1269. that it desperately needs.

1270. - All right, the bottom shelf, basil

1271. in a package, yeah?

1272. Quick as ya can please.

1273. - But the proof's in the tasting.

1274. I'm having Wayne's butternut squash soup,

1275. I hope it's better than Steve's packet minestrone.

1276. A really nice colour and it smells amazing, and.

1277. It's nice.

1278. It's not difficult to make, a very simple,

1279. homemade, rustic soup.

1280. But it, you know, this speaks volumes about a restaurant.

1281. They've built on the live music theme.

1282. Martin's still got his old magic,

1283. and now he's flambéing main courses as well as desserts.

1284. Looks fantastic.

1285. - Yep.

1286. - You sound brilliant and it smells amazing.

1287. - Yep, you actually taste it.

1288. - My very own steak Diane.

1289. The steak's nice and rare,

1290. it tastes exactly how it should be.

1291. Very good.

1292. Daniella's retained my simpler, more contemporary menu

1293. and they're cooking with fresh ingredients

1294. rather than opening a tin or a packet.

1295. And the takings have quadrupled since I was last here.

1296. That was lovely, and I'm really pleased it was lovely.

1297. And you've got the simplest things right.

1298. - Well, you've made me feel very brave about it,

1299. and I just needed someone to open my eyes up

1300. to what's dreams and what's reality.

1301. - Thank god she's woken up.

1302. She thought she'd bought success.

1303. She'd bought a restaurant full of baggage

1304. and a chef that didn't give a fuck.

1305. Now she's got the basics right.

1306. She moves forward, and this place does have a chance

1307. of survivin' for the next 30 years,

1308. providing they continue.

1309. Good food, good service, bit of atmosphere,

1310. and enjoy what you're doing.

1311. It's not difficult.