POSE 1x3

1. An FX original series.

2. Snowfall.

3. Premieres Thursday, July 19 on FX.

4. FX presents... Pose.

5. Oh, my God,

6. I want to show you something.

7. Oh. That is fine work, my brother.

8. We used to do it all the time, my mother and me.

9. I mean, Christmas was the only time that I could be myself,

10. with all the fun colors and clothes.

11. I played Melchior in the church nativity play, and my mom

12. took me to Jo-Ann's to buy fabric

13. for this big, gold robe that I would wear in the show.

14. I mean, even my dad,

15. when I came out of my bedroom

16. to show him...

17. he laughed.

18. I mean, any other day and he would've taken off his belt.

19. Well, in this house,

20. you can be the king of Arabia

21. and wear golden robes every day of the year.

22. All right, now, come on, children. Gather around.

23. We got another tradition starting this Christmas.

24. All of y'all get to ask your mother for one thing

25. she can put under the tree for y'all to open

26. - on Christmas morning.

27. Within reason, all right?

28. Don't go asking me for no damn Subaru.

29. - I-I want... - Uh-uh-uh. I want

30. python high-top sneakers

31. - with the snakeskin on it. - Right, but you can't

32. yell it out like that,

33. - like we on The Price is Right. - Mm-mmm.

34. You need to write a note to your Mother Santa,

35. put it under the tree so she can find.

36. - Angel.

37. Please write your note.

38. I told you I didn't want anything for Christmas.

39. It's Christmas.

40. I mean, everybody wants something, right?

41. When I was six years old,

42. my father took me with him to the department store

43. to buy some Christmas presents.

44. I saw this one pair

45. of red pumps with a four-inch heel.

46. I swear to God,

47. I had never seen anything quite so beautiful in my entire life.

48. When no one was looking,

49. I took one,

50. snuck it home,

51. hidden underneath my coat.

52. - When we got to the apartment,

53. I tried running straight to my room.

54. It slipped out and fell onto the floor,

55. right in front of my mother and my father.

56. I begged them to let me keep it.

57. My father s...

58. my father slapped me across the face.

59. For stealing.

60. But more so for what I chose to steal.

61. I mean, what kind of little boy

62. cries over a patent leather red pump, right?

63. He treated me different after that.

64. If she doesn't want a present, can I have hers?

65. - No. - Boy.

66. - Finish puttin' these corns to poppin'. - Why you... Look at this.

67. - Don't be clownin' my stuff, all right? - Yeah, but it look crazy.

68. - No, but it look good though. - Finish the corn that pops, honey.

69. Man, what you talking about? You seen your beads?

70. - They look great. - They look foo-foo.

71. The category is...

72. Live...

73. Work...

74. Pose!

75. The category is

76. Best Dressed High Class

77. in a Fur Coat.

78. Mink, chinchilla.

79. Come on, butch queens.

80. I better see Bugs Bunny on your goddamn back!

81. The temperature is dropping here...

82. I don't know if I'm ready for this.

83. I can't compete with them.

84. If you want to be in the house of Evangelista,

85. you gotta compete.

86. Do it for us.

87. Ooh.

88. Giving us Ralph Lauren

89. in tails.

90. A little tail ain't never hurt nobody, baby.

91. Judges, your scores, please.

92. Eight, seven, eight,

93. six and seven.

94. - Okay. - Go.

95. And what have we here?

96. Looking like a grape raccoon.

97. That fur better not touch the ground.

98. Oh... The lining.

99. The lining is the only thing to touch the ground, my darling.

100. That is how it is done.

101. Ah, judges, your scores.

102. Ten, ten, ten, ten, ten.

103. Midnight Pimping.

104. Looky here. Don't run into this one

105. in a dark alley, baby.

106. Yeah, there we have it.

107. Who's coming next?

108. Oh, my.

109. And is this Billy Dee Williams we have here... in lynx?

110. Serving us butch.

111. Serving us masculintity.

112. Go, Ricky!

113. You love it. You long for it.

114. I'm having all of it.

115. Your scores, judges, please, please.

116. Ten, ten, nine, ten, nine.

117. Whoo, Ricky!

118. First runner-up...

119. Mr. Billy Dee Williams in the white lynx.

120. I commend you on your ballroom debut.

121. All right, all right, I know it's time

122. for all of y'all to collect your trophies and go home,

123. But before you do, house mothers and fathers,

124. sound the call across the land

125. that our next event is gonna be the biggest of the year—

126. The Snow Ball, right?

127. And I expect to see you all there in your holiday best.

128. Good night.

129. The theme for our look is Santa's Workshop,

130. and we'll be all dressed as elves,

131. and you will be Mrs. Claus.

132. My festive theatrical child.

133. And Ricky's gonna help me, if that's okay.

134. He doesn't need my permission. I'm not his mother.

135. Well, since he has a trophy,

136. I'd like for you to consider letting him join

137. the House of Evangelista.

138. Mm.

139. Tell me, where'd you get the coat?

140. It was my grandmother's.

141. Don't bullshit me. That offends me.

142. I mopped it, from a coat check in midtown.

143. I just wanted to get a trophy, so I-I borrowed it.

144. But I'm gonna take it back.

145. That's not what Evangelista's about.

146. Let's get something straight.

147. I'm not running a halfway home.

148. We're a family, and I'm building a legacy.

149. I'll admit, you got something special,

150. but you're cocky.

151. Judges don't want arrogance, they want confidence.

152. If you want to win grand prize,

153. we're gonna need to work on your struts.

154. See, I told you she'd let you in.

155. No, this is a trial run.

156. You better bring it at the Snow Ball.

157. Okay.

158. I'm being a good person

159. by letting you in.

160. Which means I do not want you

161. distracting Damon from his studies.

162. If you plan on living under my roof,

163. I expect you to keep him on track.

164. - I promise, Blanca. - Good.

165. And you can call me Mother.

166. Cheers.

167. Cheers.

168. Cheers, Mother.

169. Ooh, I like the ring of that.

170. Costas.

171. Is this your lunch?

172. It must be Maryanne on duty.

173. She never brings it in.

174. It's Christmas.

175. I'm the prince.

176. Dance with me, Clara.

177. Tony, you need to get back into bed.

178. - Get away! - Oh!

179. You're ruining it.

180. Nurse! Nurse!

181. Nurse!

182. She didn't even give you a fork to eat this fucking meal with.

183. - I'm not even hungry. - Bullshit.

184. You have to eat something.

185. Get your strength back.

186. Don't look at me like that.

187. You have pneumonia.

188. I've seen people walk out of this hospital

189. who were much worse than that.

190. We got Christmas plans, baby.

191. Go see the windows on Fifth,

192. take a carriage ride through Central Park,

193. - go see The Nutcracker.

194. When did you get here?

195. What was I doing out of bed?

196. You were dancing.

197. You've always been my most brilliant,

198. dedicated student.

199. You were dancing, my darling.

200. I can't believe I'm gonna spend my last Christmas in here.

201. This is incredible.

202. I ain't never met anyone who was a real genius,

203. but you have the gift.

204. You need to make a New Year's resolution, Pray Tell.

205. Elevate your game.

206. Get your designs on a real runway.

207. A happy man knows his place.

208. Who ever got anywhere by knowing their place?

209. A man who knows his place might as well be a dead man.

210. A resolution ain't nothing without a friend

211. to kick your ass to make sure you stick to it.

212. No point in me fighting with you.

213. I know.

214. So shut up and finish pinning.

215. I'm gonna melt the Snow Ball with this piece of finery.

216. Send Elektra limping into the new year.

217. What you doing for Christmas Day?

218. Nothing. I'll probably go to the movies.

219. They have discount matinees.

220. Theater's all quiet and empty.

221. Well, what about that cute guy you've been seeing

222. that works for the city?

223. He...

224. is at Roosevelt Hospital.

225. - Yeah.

226. You two was out dancing

227. at Escuelita's just last month.

228. Yes.

229. How bad?

230. Pneumonia. We don't need

231. - to talk about this right now.

232. You think this is the first time since I've been diagnosed

233. that I had to talk about somebody dying of this plague?

234. Don't you dare treat me as delicate.

235. The worst part is...

236. that I'm used to it by now.

237. You know how many boyfriends I've seen go in there

238. over the last four years?

239. How are we supposed to get invested in someone...

240. if they can be gone a week later?

241. As if this life wasn't hard enough.

242. Oh, my God...

243. Do your kids know you're positive?

244. Now, what good would that do?

245. I'm trying to build something

246. that lasts beyond me.

247. And none of them are gonna commit to what I need them to do

248. if they think I might leave them tomorrow.

249. Not that I'm going anywhere.

250. And no way you are sitting all alone in a movie theater

251. getting fat off popcorn on Christmas.

252. - You're coming to supper, at my house.

253. Would you close your eyes for me?

254. Okay...

255. Open 'em.

256. We got, uh...

257. all brand-new appliances.

258. Microwave, toaster.

259. We got, uh, all new Formica countertops.

260. Dusty.

261. I got the, um...

262. the TV and VCR, they're on order.

263. T-That should be, uh, arriving next week.

264. Over there.

265. This is so beautiful.

266. Wow.

267. Oh, my God.

268. I don't know what to say.

269. I feel so safe here.

270. Like nothing could ever hurt me.

271. Can you make me a promise?

272. On Christmas Day,

273. I know you have your kids and stuff...

274. but if you could just come at night,

275. even just for an hour.

276. For a glass of eggnog,

277. - or whatever.

278. It would really make this place feel like a home to me.

279. Of course I will.

280. Mm.

281. Wide legs!

282. Yes. Yes.

283. There you go.

284. Sorry to interrupt.

285. Ms. St. Rogers, there's a call for you.

286. Uh, continue, everyone.

287. This is Helena.

288. Wait, when did he, uh...

289. This morning?

290. Uh, no, no, I don't have his parent's information.

291. I'm not family.

292. Just his teacher.

293. Five, six, seven, eight. - ("Crush on You" by The Jets playing)

294. One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight.

295. Feeling, more feeling, more feeling.

296. More feel...

297. Papi, that's not what I choreographed.

298. You look like a gremlin.

299. - I ain't a dancer. - Look, it's like this:

300. if you are going to win at Snow Ball—

301. and we are all walking as a house—

302. you have to do it like this,

303. because that's the way to win, okay?

304. So just watch me.

305. Five, six, five, six, seven, eight.

306. One, two, three, four, down.

307. Got it?

308. - Yeah.

309. Five, six, seven, eight.

310. Yes. That's great.

311. - Yes, that's great.

312. - Y-Yes, yes, yeah. Yeah.

313. Now you just got to learn the other 50 moves.

314. - Okay. Okay. - Okay, but that was good, that was good.

315. We gonna be here all day.

316. You got it?

317. Oh, my God, I'm late.

318. Papi, ignore them, you're doing great.

319. Keep practicing, okay?

320. Yo, Papi.

321. Shut up.

322. Five, six, seven, eight.

323. Two, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight.

324. Three, two, three, four, five, six,

325. seven, eight, four, two... Get that leg higher.

326. Higher!

327. Stop.

328. Damon.

329. I-I'm sorry, I'm not...

330. Warmed up?

331. Warm-up was half an hour ago when class started.

332. I'm-I'm sorry, I was coming

333. from all the way uptown, and I just...

334. Marcus.

335. Where'd you come from for class?

336. - Crown Heights. - Uh-huh. He was on time.

337. Why you got to call me out in front of everybody like that?

338. I have two tools I use

339. to get students to reach their potential.

340. Encouragement and shame.

341. Taking you to the ballet, that was encouragement.

342. But that didn't work, so now I'm moving on to shame.

343. I took a chance on you.

344. And I don't care if you think you're the next Alvin Ailey,

345. you will never know if you don't have any respect for me

346. or this place or yourself.

347. I love this place.

348. I mean, it's everything to me.

349. But weren't you the one that told me to go out

350. into the world, a-and explore my artistry and find my own voice?

351. Greatness comes from suffering.

352. From failing over and over until you bleed and cry.

353. And then, finally, something inside just cracks open.

354. I've got time.

355. Time is not your friend.

356. It's coming for you, for all of us.

357. It shows no mercy and it always wins,

358. and then you're gone, forgotten.

359. I'm really sorry, I-I... I was getting ready for a ball,

360. - and I...

361. Is that the size of your dreams now?

362. Get out of my class.

363. What?

364. Now.

365. Let's go from the top.

366. And... five, six, seven, eight.

367. I'm not kidding, it's like a superpower I have.

368. I can tell just by looking at you

369. how you groom your pubic hair.

370. Hmm?

371. Wasn't that an executive council meeting?

372. Yeah. I, uh... I had this idea

373. that if movies or TV shows wanted

374. to shoot in any of our properties,

375. that they should give the boss a cameo.

376. And they thought it was such a good idea,

377. I should tell it directly to him.

378. Instead of taking it to me first?

379. That's my lane, buddy.

380. Yeah, I-I didn't mean any disrespect.

381. Nobody stopped you from coming into that meeting.

382. Say, what are you up to on Christmas, huh?

383. Elektra Abundance?

384. Come right with me.

385. Good morning, Elektra. I'm Dr. Gottfried.

386. Please have a seat.

387. I apologize for being vague on the phone.

388. We're a new program at the hospital,

389. and we have to operate under the radar for now.

390. I'm a bit nervous. I haven't been to the doctor since '79.

391. Well, that is a long time.

392. We should definitely do some blood work.

393. I don't have the virus.

394. Well, that's good to hear,

395. but AIDS care isn't my specialty.

396. I'm a urologist.

397. Our new program specializes

398. in holistic care, something lacking

399. for transsexual patients.

400. It's the kind of practice my mentor,

401. Dr. Peter Harris, formalized in the '60s and '70s.

402. God rest his soul.

403. That man saved my life.

404. Anything he told me to do, I did it.

405. Psychological evaluations,

406. hormone shots, electrolysis, everything.

407. Dr. Harris helped me find Elektra.

408. Well, we fought hard to keep the clinic open after his death,

409. but the hospital was overwhelmed with AIDS patients,

410. and it didn't help that the board thought

411. what we did was unnatural and unnecessary.

412. They wanted us to just go away, and we did, for a bit,

413. but we are back,

414. and I am building the foremost practice

415. and research center

416. for transsexual medicine in the United States.

417. - Which is why I called you.

418. You were at the top of Dr. Harris's wait list

419. for sexual reassignment surgery.

420. It's even noted in his records

421. that he tried to call you numerous times.

422. Why didn't you follow up with him?

423. The list was long.

424. I didn't have the luxury to sit around waiting.

425. I didn't resign.

426. I just hustled my ass off dancing in glass boxes

427. to fulfill my most immediate needs.

428. Show World?

429. I have other patients employed there.

430. "Employed" makes it sound like a profession.

431. It's a freak show.

432. Well, I have a space reserved for you.

433. You are an ideal candidate.

434. And if your blood work and your physical examination clear,

435. we could operate in the new year.

436. How much does it all cost?

437. I will have my nurse go over the details with you.

438. What is that?

439. A wreath.

440. I thought we'd bring a little holiday spirit in here.

441. I tried to tell her a wreath ain't gonna fix my mood.

442. Christmas ain't nothing but a sad-ass reminder

443. of what we don't have.

444. Well, maybe we should do it up this year.

445. Get a tree, some presents, make it a Christmas to remember.

446. Maybe your daddy could help us out this year?

447. How dare you? I'm not some white girl

448. toting an unlimited American Express card in my Gucci bag.

449. You girls never think about how hard I work.

450. You never see my burden.

451. All you see are the jewels and the furs

452. and you think I live some high life.

453. But you don't know that he counts

454. everything he gives to me, every single cent,

455. every single goddamn gift.

456. And anything I manage to steal away goes to Abundance:

457. the rent, the lights, the food.

458. We're grateful for all you do for us, Mother.

459. Girls, I'm sorry.

460. Sometimes I get in a bad mood,

461. particularly around the holidays.

462. But why should I take that out on you?

463. You're stupid, but not incapable.

464. Let's get going.

465. Mother has a plan to deck these fucking halls.

466. I'm so sorry.

467. Now!

468. Get off of him.

469. She's taking the money!

470. Hey, stop them!

471. Oh, my...

472. I ain't never seen this much money all in one place.

473. That's why we hit the bucket up on Madison.

474. Every dollar one of those rich, Upper East Side bitches

475. put in that bucket is a gift back to themselves.

476. Wipes away all the guilt they feel

477. about spending all that money on silliness

478. to put under their tree.

479. Wait, but isn't this money supposed to go to, like,

480. - Uh-uh.

481. If we ain't charity, then who is?

482. When is the last time

483. you had a present under the Christmas tree?

484. Exactly.

485. My daddy used to buy me trucks for Christmas

486. and I would just steal my sister's Barbie dolls

487. and have Barbie riding around in them trucks

488. - like a queen and some shit. - Fuck Barbie.

489. They had Olympic Barbie, Malibu Barbie, Doctor Barbie.

490. All kinds of Barbies, but they only had one black Barbie,

491. Christie, and she was still built like a white girl.

492. There is $2,300 here.

493. A Christmas miracle.

494. Thank you, Jesus.

495. We can get three trees now.

496. Trees? Girl, we can get wigs, the human kind.

497. Girl, we can go to the spa.

498. Oh, my God, and get a massage.

499. - A back massage. - Ooh.

500. Them red boots we saw the other day,

501. them snakeskin boots.

502. Oh, those are so cute, girl. - Oh.

503. Those would look so good on me.

504. Ooh, we could walk the runway in those, girl.

505. - We would win the house down. - They would look cute on me.

506. - Boots, girl. - Mm. Mm-mm-mm-mm.

507. And we can go to Bloomingdale's and not that cheap shit.

508. Oh, yes. Absolutely.

509. All of your Christmas dreams will come true.

510. That's $2,300.

511. More than enough for a deposit for my surgery.

512. You can sign me up.

513. It's a different thing

514. to be a mother who chooses her children.

515. We got to deal with our mistakes

516. and also the mistakes of the mothers

517. who brought them into this world.

518. We don't get the benefits of a clean slate.

519. And I've seen a lot of mothers in my world

520. use that as some sort of excuse for bad behavior, but not me.

521. Once you're in my house, you're my responsibility.

522. And Damon doesn't understand yet

523. that we don't got but so much time in this world

524. and that the people out there are gonna start

525. stealing pieces of his from him.

526. What's stealing from him is his interest in those balls.

527. What we do here is work,

528. not the instant gratification that comes from dressing up

529. and walking for a trophy.

530. Excuse me?

531. Miss Uptown Fancy with your African jewels

532. and your sterling silver.

533. We can talk about Damon, but what we're not gonna do

534. is sit here and look down our noses at my world.

535. You have any idea the work and struggle

536. that goes into walking a category?

537. The point is I do understand,

538. which is why I'm saying Damon doesn't have time for both.

539. And unless a mother forces a child

540. to make the right choice, he's gonna choose the work

541. that makes him feel good right now.

542. So you're questioning my parenting skills now.

543. There's a difference between inspiration

544. and distraction.

545. Damon has more God-given talent than most,

546. but not enough to succeed without real commitment.

547. At the end of the semester, I'm going to make cuts.

548. At this point, Damon doesn't make it.

549. I'm home.

550. Uh-uh. These are for decorating later. Sit down.

551. I went and talked to your teacher this morning.

552. - She called. - I'm sorry.

553. I should've told you, but I thought I could get it

554. all figured out before you even had to know.

555. Well, here's a subway pass and a bus pass

556. so you can never use the excuse

557. that you had no money for tokens

558. and you was late because you had to walk to class.

559. You will not blow this opportunity

560. while you are living in my house.

561. I'm sorry, Mother. I know.

562. I already told Ricky

563. that I'm not gonna be around as much.

564. I promise. I'll be good from now on.

565. Oh, and no balls for a month until you can prove to me

566. that you can keep your word.

567. Yeah, but not the Snow Ball, right?

568. No balls means no balls.

569. What?

570. I told you how much Christmas means to me.

571. It's my one time of the year and you're taking that away from me?

572. The one thing that I care about.

573. Well, you know what, I'm going no matter what you say.

574. You can't stop me from walking if I want to.

575. No, but I can throw all your shit out the window

576. and on the street if you do.

577. You want to fucking try me?

578. I hate you for doing this to me!

579. Well, go and hate me in your room.

580. Can I help you?

581. Yeah. I'm looking for something for my wife.

582. My mommy!

583. What is her skin tone?

584. Different metals and gemstones look best

585. with specific skin tones.

586. Never heard that before.

587. She's, uh, got brownish-reddish hair, pale skin, brown eyes.

588. She has a cool skin tone.

589. You're gonna want white gold or silver,

590. nothing yellow and a bright stone. Now,

591. I have this really lovely white gold bracelet

592. with twin rubies.

593. What do you think?

594. Think Mommy'd like that?

595. - Wrap it up for me. Mm-hmm.

596. Hey, honey, why don't you go play

597. in that little playground out there?

598. I'll be out there in one minute, okay?

599. Okay.

600. Thanks.

601. Uh...

602. What about somebody with a darker skin tone,

603. like, Puerto Rican?

604. White gold is gonna make her look ruddy.

605. You want yellow gold with an earthy stone.

606. Like this yellow gold necklace,

607. with the orange sapphire pendant.

608. Between you and me?

609. I always say to spend more on the gift for the goomah.

610. If your wife isn't happy, she isn't gonna be calling

611. your house at 2:00 in the morning.

612. I don't know what you're talking about.

613. Sure. I'll wrap it in a separate box.

614. Merry Christmas.

615. I like to come into Jersey to do my Christmas shopping.

616. The sales tax is two percent lower here than in the city.

617. I was in the neighborhood, I figured I would just stop by

618. and give you guys my gifts.

619. It's not wise to drink alone.

620. This place is so suburban.

621. I mean that as a compliment.

622. Any man who tells you he wouldn't give it all up

623. and end up in his own version of this place is lying to you.

624. I prefer a little more flash in the decor.

625. At least four kids, but the woman...

626. woman would be just like you.

627. All you playboys long for family life,

628. but you couldn't stand it once you got it.

629. When I was 25, maybe.

630. But now...

631. now, I get lonely.

632. Especially this time of year.

633. When does Stan get home?

634. Um, he's...

635. out Christmas shopping with our daughter.

636. I'm used to not seeing him around much these days.

637. You have him working such crazy hours.

638. He's more married to you than he is to me.

639. I don't think I've ever called Stan into the city after hours.

640. Well, if you're not calling him in, then who is?

641. Beats me.

642. I'm not the only one he reports to.

643. You should ask him.

644. I get why he's working so hard, though.

645. I mean, I was the same way, at first.

646. Nothing feels better than success.

647. You get addicted.

648. Problem is that you can't control yourself.

649. You start caring more about the next fix.

650. New suit, new car, new girl.

651. Instead of what's really important: family.

652. But you can understand that, right?

653. People need that ego hit sometimes.

654. Even in the suburbs?

655. I mean, when was the last time

656. you had an experience that was brand

657. Hmm?

658. One that was just for you?

659. Weird.

660. You've kissed all those supermodels and beauty queens,

661. and you're still not very good at it.

662. I'll do better next time.

663. There won't be a next time.

664. Whose Mercedes is out front?

665. Stanley!

666. - Hey, baby. - Welcome home.

667. Mommy!

668. What are you doing here?

669. Playing Santa.

670. Dropping off presents for you and the kids.

671. All the way out to Jersey?

672. Come sit on my lap.

673. Well, thanks for coming by, man.

674. I'll... I'll show you out.

675. Patty.

676. Thank you for the wine and the chat.

677. Yep. Thanks, Matt. Merry Christmas.

678. Heck of a woman you got there, Stan.

679. Don't fuck it up.

680. Next time you want to come to my house,

681. you call me first.

682. Merry Christmas, bud.

683. Let's go take a bath.

684. Patty.

685. What was all that about?

686. He told you. He was just dropping off some presents.

687. Are y'all ready?

688. Because the category is:

689. Stone Cold Face.

690. Yes.

691. Here she comes.

692. Slender.

693. Tender.

694. For your gender.

695. Looking like a red Virginia Slim.

696. Judges, your scores.

697. Nine, nine, nine, nine.

698. Thank you very much.

699. Next.

700. This is a face category, not a fashion category.

701. If God hath given you

702. the eyebrows of Brooke Shields,

703. show the motherfuckers off!

704. Ah!

705. And the princess has arrived!

706. Yes.

707. Breathtaking.

708. This chilling angel has clearly been resuscitated.

709. Uh-huh.

710. Judges, your scores?

711. Ten, ten, ten, ten.

712. Breathtaking scores for the frostiest bitch in New York.

713. Grand prize, Miss Angel, Evangelista.

714. How did we do?

715. First runner up.

716. Not bad.

717. Yeah, we would've won if you were there.

718. It tore up my guts to keep it from you.

719. No, you were right.

720. You're a good mother.

721. I was sitting here in the dark

722. trying to remember when I found out Santa Claus wasn't real.

723. No one ever told me straight out.

724. It didn't come like a bullet,

725. it came like poison.

726. You know, the kind that act real slow?

727. So you don't even know it's there until you're dead.

728. My sister made sure to tell me the second someone told her.

729. Came right into my room and announced it.

730. "Santa ain't real."

731. I couldn't have been more than four years old.

732. Did you believe her?

733. I mean, a hundred percent?

734. Nah.

735. I guess I didn't.

736. I want to go back there.

737. I mean, not back home

738. or to my parents, but...

739. I want to go back to when I could be innocent.

740. Or at least remember when I lost it.

741. You don't know that that feeling's not forever

742. until it's too late.

743. - Morning, sleepyhead.

744. Mm

745. - Merry Christmas. - Merry Christmas.

746. Are you hungry? I made you breakfast.

747. Oh.

748. Christmas morning was always special in my house.

749. Traditions are important to me.

750. We'll start our own, then.

751. Bam.

752. What is it?

753. You got to open it.

754. This is the one that I was eyeing at The Wiz.

755. Wait, did you mop this?

756. No, I saved my coins.

757. You deserve it, and more.

758. Mm.

759. Is this my Christmas present?

760. The first part.

761. Yeah.

762. I'm ready.

763. Wait, are you sure?

764. Ricky... I'm ready.

765. How do we play?

766. This is The Game of Life, baby.

767. You just, you spin the wheel.

768. Yeah, and you move it through the board.

769. And then you, uh, you get stuff on the way,

770. and wh-whoever gets the most money

771. and-and gets married and has the most kids

772. at the end of the game wins.

773. And if there isn't a part of the game

774. where you pee every time you sneeze

775. and every so-called friend disappoints you,

776. - it's a fraud. - Bobbi.

777. A child should know the truth.

778. Mommy missed one of her presents.

779. We got to give it to her.

780. Stay here, okay?

781. You missed one.

782. I'll do it later.

783. Come on, it's Christmas morning.

784. There are more presents under that tree

785. than the past three years combined.

786. You've been acting like this the whole time.

787. What's up with you?

788. Matt told me about never making you work late.

789. You've been lying to me.

790. What the hell are you talking about?

791. I'm talking about you being a cheating asshole.

792. I'm talking about you sticking your dick in other women

793. and then coming home to me.

794. Who is she, huh?

795. She one of those whore secretaries?

796. Come on, kids, Mommy and Daddy need to talk.

797. Wouldn't be Christmas without a fight.

798. You lost your mind?

799. This is your mother talking.

800. She's constantly undermining you.

801. Don't put this on me.

802. I never said a bad word about you in my life.

803. Stop.

804. Patty, stop.

805. Listen to me.

806. Matt isn't my only boss.

807. I report to ten different people.

808. He's jealous of what you and I have.

809. Your daughter told me about the two presents.

810. You couldn't have waited

811. till you weren't with our kid to buy your girlfriend a present?

812. I don't have a girlfriend.

813. Want me to prove it?

814. Merry Christmas.

815. Yes, I bought a bracelet and a necklace.

816. And I felt like shit about how much I've been working,

817. and I haven't been home to help with the kids,

818. and so I bought you both.

819. I'm sorry. I'm just...

820. I'm not used to not having you around all the time,

821. and it's just me and the kids

822. and all these thoughts in my brain.

823. Yeah, I know, I know. It's okay.

824. It's okay.

825. We just got to make it through the next couple years, okay?

826. You know what my favorite part of Christmas is?

827. Your mom being here?

828. No.

829. No, and it's not the presents or the decorations or the music.

830. It's...

831. it's just us together as a family all day.

832. I love you.

833. I know, baby. I love you, too.

834. Merry Christmas.

835. Oh, stop it. You're flattering me.

836. Stop it.

837. Angel, you naughty, naughty girl, you.

838. So naughty.

839. Boy, what are you doing? There's a reason it's wrapped.

840. Just tell me if Blanca's coming.

841. Put the present down, please.

842. You think this need more salt?

843. Don't ask me.

844. I ain't never cooked anything besides a can of Chunky's.

845. Oh, well, what's wrong with you?

846. You still broken up about your married white boy?

847. Get over it. You here with your family now.

848. The men will come and go, but we always here for you.

849. The turkey!

850. Oh, shit! Shit, shit. Oh, shit.

851. - Open the window.

852. Hurry up, hurry.

853. What are we gonna eat now?

854. What y'all laughing at?

855. Oh, my...

856. I would order this platter.

857. All right,

858. before y'all fingers get greasy,

859. let's open some of these gifts.

860. You ain't got to tell me twice.

861. Ooh.

862. Uh-huh.

863. For you, Ricky.

864. Damon.

865. Aw, shit! - Thank you.

866. I'm-a be stylin' and profilin'.

867. Look inside.

868. Gonna need some socks for them feet.

869. Thank you.

870. Thank you.

871. I got you.

872. This one's for you.

873. Before I met you, everything was in black and white.

874. And that kind of thinking don't work in a gray world.

875. You taught me to appreciate life and treasure every breath.

876. You adjusted my focus and now I see in color.

877. I just hope you do that for other people.

878. Yeah.

879. Angel, you... you didn't open your present.

880. Mm-mmm. I told you I didn't want anything.

881. Oh, girl, open it.

882. - Mm-mmm, not with that fork.

883. Lord Jesus, you got us bawling like bitches

884. before we've even eaten.

885. What is wrong with you?

886. We all pitched in, Mother, and got you this.

887. Now what is this?

888. Okay.

889. - It's a cute wrapper.

890. - I picked it out. - Okay, you right.

891. So it's a heart 'cause that's what you are to us.

892. Our heart.

893. Excuse me. Thank you.

894. I love y'all.

895. But could we eat?

896. - Oh. - Boy.

897. - Yes, please. - Chin up, sweetheart.

898. Daddy's hungry, hungry.

899. - Pass the lo mein. - Merry Christmas, y'all.

900. Merry Christmas.

901. Captioned by Media Access Group at WGBH

902. I want to be on Broadway, on television.

903. I was put out of my house because I was gay.

904. You know, it's just really hard when you want to be who you are.

905. And coming to New York where everything is possible, you know.

906. I'm here. I'm here. I'm here!

907. I've been growin' the business.

908. You about to move into the big leagues.

909. Never thought life would be this good,

910. and it's worth whatever's comin'.

911. Stop right there! Freeze!

912. - Lucky me, man. Wait!

913. I always knew you wasn't built for this!

914. Not too long ago, you were happy with just a few hundred dollars.

915. How we grow, huh?

916. Snowfall. Season premiere.

917. Thursday, July 19 on FX.