1. Did you measure the tables?
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2. I'm I crazy or do the 6x10 tablecloths
look way too big.
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3. No...
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4. rented.
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5. Come on man, fan the napkins!
People waited 20 years for this.
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6. Make it special.
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7. - Make it special.
- These will make it special.
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8. Fan, fan!
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9. Yeah, that seemed to work.
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10. - Ron, this isn't you're...
- There you are.
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11. - Melinda.
- Problem.
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12. The ice machine is running slow
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13. we need to buy ice,
and there's no freezer space...
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14. No, no, not to worry we have backup.
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15. We have dual-cycle a hoshizaki
crescent cuber. Best in the world.
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16. So you can just... chill.
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17. If you have a backup
of your schedule,
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18. - that would be great.
- That'd be a big help.
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19. Excellent.
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20. Actually...
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21. Ron, the name tags are
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22. just for the people at the reunion.
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23. Yeah, I know.
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24. I sat behind you
for two years in social studies.
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25. Oh my god, the back
of your hair still looks wonderful.
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26. Ron Donald.
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27. I coughed a lot.
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28. Party Down
S01E09
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29. I got cutest guy,
cutest couple, I got
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30. best hair, best smile of course.
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31. And I would've got prettiest eyes
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32. but they canceled the category, 'cause
some dildo got blinded at the prom,
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33. lame.
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34. You must be Harry.
I'm Bobbi st. Brown.
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35. Constance's roommate.
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36. What happened to Constance?
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37. She's with some guy Zoltan who
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38. promised to make her a big star
in blurvistan or something.
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39. I know, sounds like escort work.
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40. Anyway I bet Constance
that I could inspire you
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41. and get you back acting
before she got back.
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42. So let me take a look at you, okay.
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43. Now your face is kind of pinched
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44. and forward...
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45. like a sphincter.
You know it's very...
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46. - Tight.
- It's tight and it's dark.
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47. - We can change all that.
- Yeah, good luck.
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48. - I'm not really in the acting b...
- Not.
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49. - Can't use that word, it's negative.
- Okay.
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50. I sensed that about you.
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51. And that's why
I brought you some positivity.
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52. Indian scientists they tape recorded
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53. these dolphins laughing.
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54. And it turns out
it's the happiest sound on earth,
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55. scientifically proven.
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56. Let me see it.
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57. You gotta smile fifty times a day,
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58. so no excuses go ahead.
Let's see you do one.
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59. Okay, what did you bet Constance?
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60. - Ten dollars.
- Cause actually,
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61. I'm moving back home
with my parents.
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62. So,
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63. nice meet to you.
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64. Hey did you say 50 times?
Cause I always thought it was 90 times.
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65. 90 would make you go insane.
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66. Sounds like regular
fuckin' dolphins.
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67. You're not a dolphin scientist?
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68. Jim Sledge, wrestling champion.
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69. Came out senior year,
big scandal, big scandal.
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70. Denise klinger. Yearbook, ritalin.
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71. Jenelle Beismeyer,
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72. Total whore.
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73. Ron, why didn't you just take
the day off and go to your reunion?
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74. Are you kidding me
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75. are you kidding me?
When I heard party down got this gig
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76. I said I wanna to work it, man.
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77. These people only
remember me as "Bluto, "
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78. the wild and crazy guy, and I want
show them I got my shit together.
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79. Bluto? Like Popeye?
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80. - No.
- Like the fat guy from Popeye?
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81. Were you fat?
Were you a fat guy in high school?
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82. No like Belushi's
character in "Animal House. "
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83. - Okay, I was fun and crazy.
- Two gin and tonics, please.
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84. Listen, guys, I know you like
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85. to fool around,
but I was wondering if you could maybe,
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86. act like I'm a good boss
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87. and... respect me.
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88. Cause if they see the kind of guy
that I am now, the new Ron,
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89. it would really help me out a lot,
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90. the other guys said okay, so...
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91. - Yeah sure, Ron.
- Excellent, thank you.
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92. Melinda Weintraub, former
class president and reunion coordinator!
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93. And needing a splash of Chardonnay.
Splash of Chardonnay.
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94. We're got 30 "won't attends"
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95. who just decided to show up anyway,
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96. and parking, god, it's a nightmare.
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97. A splash, Henry.
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98. The woman said splash that's not
a splash, what are you an idiot?
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99. Splash.
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100. Yes sir.
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101. Fresh glass.
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102. Splash, walla!
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103. Thanks, Ron.
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104. - Thank you, guys so much.
- Sure.
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105. So what's this bullshit rumor
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106. I hear about you moving home?
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107. It's not bullshit.
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108. No, I mean, you know,
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109. I have no career, I'm...
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110. barely making rent playing
as an extra on other people's lives?
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111. Come on,
I gotta face reality at some point
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112. Henry, you can't that.
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113. Why, because you need
my shoulder to cry on
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114. and my amusing asides
to breakup the boredom of your day?
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115. No, just... you can't move back
in with your parents like...
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116. - Who does that?
- Cause you'll miss me too much?
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117. Is that why?
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118. Joe Spanelle! Dave Griggs,
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119. how's your drink? You almost done?
What do you need, scotch and soda?
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120. Hey Bobbi, scotch and soda, asap.
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121. Hey, Eddie, Steve-o, Lorraine.
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122. How's it going?
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123. How have you guys been?
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124. Alice, how's that pilaf?
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125. Firm?
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126. What have you guys been doing
for the last 20 years?
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127. Twenty years, oh my god.
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128. You're not eating your chicken.
When did you serve yourself? Two?
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129. Five? Six minutes ago?
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130. Come here.
We've got a situation.
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131. How many cans
are you burning per chafer?
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132. - What?
- Cans. Hot cans. How many you got
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133. - burning per chafing unit?
- Are you talking about
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134. - the sterno things?
- Correct.
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135. How many cans
are you burning per chafing unit?
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136. - I have no idea.
- This is what I need, okay?
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137. Minimum of two per casserole
or three for a one-porsh.
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138. - I have no idea what you're saying.
- Please, please.
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139. Right on captain.
I'm gonna go do what you said.
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140. We call him captain
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141. here all of us do cause he's our boss
and we really respect him.
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142. Wait a minute.
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143. Bluto?
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144. Holy shit.
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145. What're you catering this for unit?
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146. Hardly recognized me, right?
Yeah, I'm
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147. I'm team leader, running the show.
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148. Don, last I remember
you were puking all over that...
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149. Who wants to talk about the past,
it's a reunion, right?
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150. - And it's Ron by the way.
- You're thinking of Donnie.
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151. That's it you're buddy Donnie.
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152. Donnie and Ron. "Dron"
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153. Oh my god,
that guy right over there.
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154. Hey enjoy
you're meal everybody, Karen.
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155. Thirty, thirty-one...
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156. thirty-two, that's thirty-two today.
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157. All right.
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158. Did you listen to the dolphins yet?
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159. - I haven't.
- Come on, let's do it right now then.
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160. - I don't think I can.
- They're such smart animals.
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161. Did you know that dolphins
can change a babies diaper underwater?
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162. - I don't thinks that's true at all.
- And there's a mug I want you to see.
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163. - A mug?
- It's a stallion
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164. and it's on it's back legs
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165. and he's roaring and he says,
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166. "follow your dreams
to the max" amen.
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167. Well I would love
to do that with you Bobbi
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168. but I promised Ron
I wouldn't screw around today,
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169. you know what,
that's what your problem is.
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170. You got those like kind eyes,
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171. and you know what Henry,
nice guys finish last.
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172. But grab your destiny by the balls
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173. and squeeze hard. I'll bet in you've
never done that in your career,
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174. I wouldn't even know
where destiny's balls are.
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175. When I auditioned
for "cannonball run, two, "
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176. You know what I did
with the girl I was up against?
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177. - I don't know if I wanna know.
- I hit her with my car.
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178. - You're car?
- And I felt right.
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179. A car?
Wait, wasn't that Constance?
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180. People, working professionally,
like we talked about.
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181. Yeah, no, I know, Ron.
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182. This is where you tell Ron,
to shove it up his big asshole.
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183. Cause you got to go look at a mug.
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184. Did you hear all this about Henry
maybe moving home.
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185. What?
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186. Shit.
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187. That's really gonna
screw up our wedding season.
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188. Bathroom, isn't it...
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189. I thought I saw you dude.
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190. Together again, bro.
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191. - Dron!
- Hey Donnie, how you doing?
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192. Good to see ya.
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193. Dude, what are you wearing?
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194. Well, this is my job, yeah I gotta
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195. bunch of people working
underneath me I'm team leader.
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196. Team leader?
Holy shit man.
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197. You? The big cheese?
What are you gonna do?
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198. - Can we eat these?
- Yes, it's food.
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199. So... how's it going for you Donnie?
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200. Set up just like we talked about.
Like we talked about?
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201. Yeah, that time in the park?
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202. We found that schnapps
and got blitzed
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203. and decided all you ever need
is a roof and beer money?
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204. Guess what, dude?
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205. - You have a roof and beer money?
- Parent's garage in Reseda
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206. and a gig at an old folk's home
where I barely have to do anything.
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207. Dude...
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208. this is your gig?
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209. - Yes.
- Awesome!
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210. Let's turn this mother out, man!
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211. Well I actually,
don't that kind of thing anymore.
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212. There you are.
Ron, there's a disaster.
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213. Melinda. Be right with you.
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214. Casey, can you show
this gentleman to the bathroom.
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215. Casey I need you to do me a favor
and watch this guy please.
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216. - Why, who is that guy?
- He was my best friend.
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217. Take him to the back bar,
tell him food's free drinks,
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218. - just keep him away from me.
- Why if he's your best friend
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219. - do you want him out of your sight?
- Old Ron, old Ron.
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220. Things are going great for me up there,
I don't want him screwing it up.
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221. Thank you.
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222. Mr. Laporte, enjoy the party.
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223. - We'll rock the shit out later dude.
- I don't know what that means.
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224. - Melinda, please.
- We'll rock the shit out later!
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225. I need the slide show
set up in ten minutes,
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226. but I can't find
the a/v stuff anywhere.
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227. Melinda, I am one step ahead of you
we have staff on it right now.
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228. Oh thank god...
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229. Chardonnay, pronto.
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230. - Four ounces.
- Yep. There you go.
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231. Madame coordinator.
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232. - That's quite a staff.
- They weren't always.
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233. But with benchmarks,
clear-cut deliverables,
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234. they're getting there.
God, tell me about it.
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235. I've got thirty people in my department,
it's like herding cats.
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236. Oh my goodness.
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237. Okay.
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238. - Wish me luck.
- Like you need it.
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239. - Good luck.
- Stop it.
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240. Hello, cougars!
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241. "How we gonna do it? "
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242. "Cougar-style. "
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243. Oh man.
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244. Henry, this is Donnie, this is Ron's
best friend from high school.
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245. He would like a drink.
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246. You'n Bluto, huh?
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247. - He told you about that day?
- Day?
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248. I thought it was a nickname,
'cause he was fun...
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249. Bluto was from senior fling.
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250. It was classic.
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251. Okay, we got this park
for the whole class for the weekend,
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252. right, and everyone's super-psyched,
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253. okay super-psyched.
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254. You know how belushi chugs
a bottle of whiskey in "Animal House? "
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255. So, Ron's like, "hey, I'm gonna
chug a bottle of whiskey too",
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256. and he gets halfway through
and just spews
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257. and gets alcohol poisoning
and has to go to the hospital!
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258. They cancelled the whole thing!
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259. People were fuckin' pissed.
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260. People were fuckin' pissed.
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261. That's why they call him
Bluto 'cause of that.
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262. It was fuckin' amazing.
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263. Tried it myself a few months back,
but I don't think it can be done.
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264. This guy lives
with his parents in Reseda.
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265. Their garage.
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266. - I see.
- Henry is thinking
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267. about moving back home
with his mommy and his daddy too.
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268. Okay, stay tuned
for "I remember rolf high. "
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269. Rave reviews, rave reviews.
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270. - I thought I was going to faint.
- You were perfect.
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271. - I need a glass of something.
- I have just what the doctor ordered.
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272. I was a rodeo clown, but I got horned
in the scrotum and that was that.
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273. Yeah, I know
the approximate feeling.
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274. So then I was just, like,
fuck it, I'm moving back home.
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275. And how's
that workin' out for you Donnie?
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276. Weird at first, you know but,
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277. I have roommates who're my parents.
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278. They nag, but I got the garage.
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279. The garage
that does sounds pretty important.
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280. Will you be enjoying garage access
at your parent's house, Henry?
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281. Yeah but living
at home it's better than
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282. just treading water.
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283. You have a secure base
to reconsider your next move.
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284. Right?
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285. - Next move?
- Yeah, for...
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286. your life.
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287. This is my life.
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288. Drooon!
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289. - We gonna do this shit or what?
- Donnie, when you were
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290. rodeo clowning?
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291. Did any of the other clowns maybe,
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292. I don't know
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293. - ask you to stay?
- Ed,
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294. my drinking buddy.
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295. He was like,
"dude, who am I gonna drink with? "
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296. And what'd you tell Ed?
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297. I'm broke and I got horned
in the balls, I'm out.
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298. Would you've stayed if ed said he had
strong feelings about you staying,
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299. but he kind of had
a hard time expressing them?
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300. He did say something like that,
I was like
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301. "dude. "
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302. Wipe that smile off your face
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303. and that was stupid because
he has a smile makeup
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304. from the clown
so that didn't make sense at all
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305. - Can I talk to you in back a sec?
- Yeah.
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306. I said...
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307. Yeah that's cool just ask me a question
and walk away. That's all right.
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308. That's the good stuff.
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309. It's a personal gift
from Dennis Quaid's manager's lawyer.
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310. I did his kid's bar mitzvah.
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311. What was Dennis Quaid like?
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312. I don't know. But his manager's
lawyer's kid is an asshole.
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313. God, I feel relaxe
for the first time in like weeks.
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314. - No kidding.
- Isn't this supposed to be fun?
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315. Well that's the idea, right?
But
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316. hey, let's face it,
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317. - we're the grownups now.
- Scary!
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318. God, twenty years.
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319. We were so young.
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320. I can't believe
I used to be that person, you know?
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321. I think what I was like.
I was this ambitious
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322. achiever who was...
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323. to be a senator
and change the world.
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324. Yeah, right?
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325. I mean who was that crazy kid
with those dumb ideas?
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326. I was going to collect more frogs
than anybody else in the world.
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327. Class president, class clown.
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328. And yet now,
we're not so different are we.
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329. It's like a movie.
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330. It's like, you go to your reunion
and you're not...
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331. labeled anymore.
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332. You know As the grind or the...
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333. - the dork
- Guilty.
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334. You know it's like,
people are mature.
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335. They see you for who you are
and you connect with people
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336. you can connect with people
you never connected with before
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337. and your whole life
can change in one night.
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338. Exactly!
You know, that's
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339. what I thought
the ten year would be like.
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340. I had this fantasy that...
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341. Mark Defino would realize
he was in love with me.
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342. I mean, he didn't show, so...
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343. god!
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344. Well, you never know
what might happen.
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345. No, he was a "won't attend. "
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346. Well, but you never know what
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347. might happen with someone else...
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348. - ... could beat terminator,
- He would eat the shit
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349. - out of that machine.
- What are you doing?
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350. Working... sir.
What are you guys doing?
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351. I better get back.
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352. Sure.
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353. Idiots.
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354. Okay, we're idiots.
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355. I don't know Casey, I'm...
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356. just drifting,
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357. with nothing, and
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358. a casual hook-up arrangement
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359. is it's nice
but it's not quite enough for me
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360. to build a life around.
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361. I mean...
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362. if you... asked me to stay, I'd...
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363. I might stay.
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364. Okay, then stay.
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365. The Zigger!
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366. J. Jimmy.
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367. - What's up?
- What's going on?
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368. - Mark Defino.
- Correct.
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369. You were listed as a "won't attend. "
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370. - Will you staying long?
- I don't know.
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371. Happened to be in town,
I thought I'd swing by?
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372. - Because they called and your house...
- Ron, we've got a situation.
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373. - I know...
- The men's bathroom is...
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374. - Mark?
- Melinda Weintraub?
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375. Mark was just thinking about leaving
because his house is on fire.
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376. Ron, can you check the men's room?
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377. Because people are complaining
the stall's blocked or something,
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378. I have to do the "I remember"
speeches in fifteen minutes so.
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379. Yes, of course.
I will get on that immediately, Roman!
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380. The bathrooms need some attendance
the men's room, so take care of it.
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381. Well, you should
take care of it then.
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382. We're done here, boss.
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383. I'll be right back.
Please don't move.
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384. So Mark,
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385. what're you up to?
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386. Running a venture marketing firm,
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387. doing some heli-skiing.
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388. - I need you to go to the men's room.
- Not now, Ron.
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389. What happen to respect?
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390. If it isn't Ron...
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391. - Can you move, buddy?
- Too much shrimp and brew...
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392. Why don't you
come out of there buddy?
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393. - Clean yourself up. Come outta there.
- Buddy. I don't think you mean that.
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394. Of course I do, of course, I do.
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395. No, you're like,
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396. "I'm team leader. Fuck Dron,
fuck my high school buddy,
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397. fuck my reunion memories, fuck it! "
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398. - Fuck it!
- That's not true. It's not true.
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399. Listen...
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400. Melinda Weintraub and I
have a connection,
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401. we made a connection tonight.
We made a connection.
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402. I knew it! I knew it!
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403. Oh, that's g... God, see...
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404. At first I was, like,
"Why's Ron being such a douche"?
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405. But then, I get it, Weintraub...
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406. - She's okay, she's single...
- Yes.
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407. - She's mid-thirties...
- Yes, she is.
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408. Nice-looking but not hot, right?
Insecure.
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409. Oh, my God.
That's fish in a barrel, dude.
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410. Do it. Do it.
***. You ***.
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411. Get up in that, get up in it...
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412. Donnie, stop. Stop.
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413. Listen...
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414. Buddy.
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415. Why don't you clean yourself up
and get outta there, okay?
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416. I promise to come out,
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417. if you promise to nail
Melinda Weintraub.
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418. Okay, all right, I promise.
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419. It'll be like a movie.
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420. You could score one for the losers,
all right?
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421. You're not a loser,
just clean yourself up, all right?
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422. You got it, all right, okay.
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423. Where's Melinda? We're five minutes
away from the "I remember" speeches.
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424. It's on the schedule.
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425. They're starting their speeches,
so they need you for the intros.
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426. Mark, I'll...
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427. Crazy night, huh?
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428. The shit people get into
after twenty years, huh.
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429. It's pretty wild?
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430. Did you see that guy don?
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431. I did, yeah.
That's... That's sad stuff.
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432. Steve said he's waitering
his own reunion.
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433. He thinks people are going
to be impressed by it,
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434. it's hilarious,
everyone's just laughing at him.
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435. You mean Ron?
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436. Shit, I thought it was that other guy,
man I'm...
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437. And finally,
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438. Jena baron with her
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439. "Memory of a legendary
drill-team competition. "
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440. Jena, come on up!
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441. All right, "Go Cougars", right.
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442. So you're saying you hit Constance
with a car?
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443. - Damn!
- But it was a small car.
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444. And I gave her my copy of zen
and the art of motorcycle maintenance,
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445. which blew her mind.
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446. It sucks that...
Henry has to go home.
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447. Live with his parents and shit,
right?
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448. That's actually not happening.
He's gonna stay.
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449. - I knew it.
- All right.
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450. Mission accomplished.
I get to keep my ten bucks.
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451. Hey, there. Pardon me.
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452. Okay, got it.
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453. Take a deep breath.
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454. I knew if we didn't pull off
the routine of our lives,
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455. we didn't stand a chance
of advancing to regional's.
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456. But that afternoon,
the girls brought it,
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457. big time, and it was so...
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458. Hey, classmates,
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459. I gotta a high school memory for ya.
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460. Some of you maybe remember me
as Bluto,
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461. thanks to the fact I tried
and failed to chug bottle of booze
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462. and I ruined senior fling.
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463. Well guess what people?
I got some news for you, I am a new man.
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464. I am a success now!
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465. I mean, you might've told me
you were married before I fucked you.
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466. Would you've fucked me
if I told you I was married first?
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467. Gotta split.
Good seeing you, Melissa.
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468. Jesus! Why do you always do this?
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469. Here we are again.
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470. Class president and the class clown.
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471. Call 911, please!
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472. Call an ambulance!
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473. Call them now!
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