Ozzy and Jack's World Detour 1x9

1. I've always wanted to go to Cuba.

2. Just because, that it's like,

3. this forbidden land.

4. There's something dark. I, I—

5. Yeah! Because it's, like,

6. the forbidden place. It's like, "Oh wow, Cuba."

7. Like, I've been raised in a country that

8. thinks that Cuba is terrible and so

9. I want to go check it out for myself.

10. It seems pretty odd that a country

11. that banned rock and roll has a memorial for

12. John Lennon.

13. Well, you can still sit in Cuba and

14. think about smoking a big stogie.

15. My name's Jack Osbourne and this...

16. is my dad Ozzy.

17. Heavy metal god.

18. Are you ready? Prince of Darkness.

19. And surprisingly enough,

20. history nerd.

21. As the old saying goes,

22. Like father, like son.

23. So my dad and I are doing something we've

24. always wanted to do. We're hitting the road.

25. Just the two of us and a bucket list of

26. places and things we've only ever read

27. about in books.

28. Oh my god, this is amazing.

29. Or seen on TV and the web.

30. Do you have your knife? Yeah.

31. 'Cause of all days, we might need it.

32. There are no roadies. No tour busses.

33. What the... is this.

34. No boundaries.

35. Welcome to Ozzy and Jack's World Detour.

36. Let's rock and roll.

37. All right, so uh, we are inbound now.

38. Just about to land in Havana.

39. We're gonna be cruising around Havana.

40. Wow.

41. Hello. Hello. Tis I.

42. Hey, you know what? What?

43. Well, I mean there's the park here

44. but I haven't heard that they buried him here.

45. Um, so we have a car waiting for us

46. downstairs right now.

47. We're gonna go for a drive into old Havana,

48. figure out what we're gonna do.

49. All right, you ready to go?

50. Yeah, let's go.

51. Did you bring your Cuban heel boots?

52. No. Is, is that where the word comes from?

53. I think that's Boris right there.

54. So, when planning our Cuban adventure,

55. I hired a guide named Boris.

56. And finally!

57. Nice to meet you! Nice to meet you, too.

58. Ozzy! It's not a pleasure, it's an honor to host you.

59. Well, thanks for having us.

60. Oh man, I hope you will have fun.

61. Oh, oh, I have no doubt. Okay, come over here.

62. All right. Thank you.

63. What a beautiful car. You like?

64. Yeah.

65. Wow, this thing is awesome.

66. Get some energy for tonight!

67. We will.

68. So cool.

69. This car is beautiful, lovely.

70. It's your car?

71. And have they had it since the fifties?

72. Yes.

73. Because of the U. S. embargo imposed

74. in the nineteen sixties, there are no

75. new American cars imported into Cuba.

76. There's tons of classic cars.

77. You inherit a car and you have to

78. keep that car running because it's the only

79. car you're ever going to have.

80. So, everyone takes pride in being able to

81. maintain their car and operate it.

82. Cars are talking to each other.

83. It's like R2-D2.

84. Is it too windy for you?

85. My hair whips my face.

86. You've got those long, luscious locks.

87. Yeah, I know. That's what I'm saying.

88. Our first stop in Havana was Plaza Viejo

89. or the Old Square.

90. The stray dogs here are amazing.

91. They're all like, these gangster-y,

92. tough looking dogs.

93. Some hats? Should we check these out?

94. Yeah.

95. This one will fit mummy. Let's see. It's a little big.

96. That's all right, she's got a big head.

97. Look, there's a coffee shop here.

98. We can go hang out in if you want.

99. Okay.

100. Supposed to have really good coffee as well.

101. Yep.

102. So, uh, let me try these hats on for muma.

103. Smile.

104. Gracias. Thank you.

105. Why do you drink it? I like that 'pow'.

106. You wanna know what we got planned?

107. Well I don't want to go to everything

108. where you want to go. Well, I mean we're gonna—

109. I mean, give me a break.

110. What do you want to do?

111. I want to do this.

112. They have bits of a U-2 um,

113. spy plane they shot down.

114. But, I wanna go to the Lennon thing

115. more than anything.

116. Have they told you about the sunglasses

117. and the Lennon statue? No.

118. So, the Lennon statue has a pair of

119. sunglasses and people kept stealing them

120. so there's a government guard who keeps the

121. sunglasses but when you sit down to take a picture,

122. he comes out and he puts the glasses

123. on the statue.

124. He lets you take a picture and then he

125. takes them and puts them away.

126. Wow. So, what I want to do—

127. I want to check out some cigar stuff.

128. Why would you wanna do that?

129. Because I love cigars and I want to

130. bring a back but,

131. I can only bring a limited amount back legally.

132. So, I was thinking um, you know, we can

133. maybe duct tape some of my cigars

134. around you to go through customs.

135. You can off.

136. But even—listen, don't act like you've

137. never muled some drugs.

138. Never done anything like that.

139. In that case, let's just change

140. the subject, okay?

141. Did you bring your dancing shoes?

142. Check it out, there's a salsa club.

143. I—I'm not saying I'm gonna dance but

144. there's a salsa club right down the street

145. from the hotel and it's supposed to be like, the spot.

146. So. Fabulous.

147. I'm gonna check it out. You can off.

148. With our plans set,

149. it was time to head out to the first destination

150. on my dad s Cuban bucket list.

151. The Museum de la Revolucion in the

152. Presidential Palace. Look at that thing.

153. In nineteen forty-six, Winston Churchill

154. came to Cuba and visited the palace

155. and my dad wanted to follow in his footsteps.

156. Wow. Look, look at these. Wow.

157. Look at that tank. Go in.

158. Oh. Hi.

159. Ozzy? Oh, hi.

160. Thank you. Hello.

161. Soraya. Amelie.

162. Hi, Soraya. Jack, how are you?

163. Nice to meet you too. All right. Let's go upstairs.

164. Are these uh, all bullet holes?

165. Wow. Wow. Dad.

166. What? These are all bullet holes.

167. So, here's what I know about the

168. Cuban Revolution.

169. The Cuban Revolution lasted from about

170. nineteen fifty-three to nineteen fifty-nine.

171. That's when Fidel Castro led an armed revolt

172. against the corrupt Cuban President, Batista.

173. Now, Batista had become this crazy dictator

174. who was not looking out for the Cuban people.

175. And finally, in nineteen fifty-nine,

176. the rebels led by Castro ousted Batista,

177. who fled Cuba leaving Castro installed as

178. the new Marxist Prime Minister.

179. You will have to help me with my English.

180. Better than my Spanish.

181. Okay.

182. It was built in nineteen-twenty.

183. This painting in the ceiling,

184. it was made by a Cuban artist.

185. It represents the birth of the Cuban Republic.

186. Wow.

187. Yep.

188. They tried to. Shoot him from here?

189. Yes. Wow.

190. I think it's pretty amazing that they

191. did leave all the bullet holes in

192. the building and—

193. That's true, yeah. Leave them in the wall,

194. not in me.

195. That's funny. Look, George Bush,

196. George Bush Sr., Reagan.

197. Do you see what it says there?

198. "Thank you cretan for helping us strengthen

199. the revolution."

200. I guess they don't like capitalists.

201. Humor. It's like satire, right?

202. Yeah.

203. That area was called Cretans Corner.

204. Cretans corner? I mean is it creh-tan

205. or cree-tan?

206. I don't know! I didn't know that—

207. Creh-tan. I don't know.

208. Are they the same word? I don't know?

209. So, they're creh-tans. Cree-tans.

210. Very funny.

211. This is a very interesting telephone.

212. People in Cuba used to say that Batista used

213. a telephone that was made of gold.

214. Gold.

215. And that famous telephone, is this one.

216. But it was not made of gold.

217. It had all— Just painted?

218. Hello!

219. It's original.

220. I love that we're in what used

221. to be the Presidential Palace of Cuba

222. and you're like, picking up the gold phone.

223. Can I sit at the desk?

224. What? Can I sit down at the desk?

225. Yes. Yeah.

226. Yeah?

227. He's going to be our president

228. for a few minutes.

229. All right. Your turn.

230. No, no, no.

231. You can sit and I can take a picture.

232. After we had ticked off one of my dad s

233. bucket list choices, it was time for us to

234. do one of mine, salsa dancing.

235. Absolutely stunning.

236. Hey, where are we going now?

237. We're headed back to the hotel

238. so we can get ready for salsa dancing tonight.

239. No dad, I m not. But, I hope you brought

240. your dancing shoes.

241. You can off.

242. Hello.

243. Hello, hi Jack. Are we ready to get on?

244. Couple things. What?

245. Firstly, as you can tell, outside it's raining.

246. As a result, dancing is off.

247. Oh, that's fantastic. But you and I, we can salsa.

248. Oh, I m not dancing.

249. My dad and I were in Cuba, and my salsa

250. dancing dreams had just got rained out.

251. But, I'm an Osbourne and I always have

252. a backup plan.

253. Did you go to the smoking room?

254. I did. Since dancing is off, I will go

255. back and have a cheeky round two.

256. Why is it that you've suddenly gone

257. ballistic on cigars?

258. I don't smoke that many! I just—

259. I like Cigars! We're in Cuba.

260. That's the thing though. I used to smoke them next

261. to your mom in bed.

262. I remember. We'd be in bed as kids

263. and you would just be like,

264. "Just cover your nose and mouth

265. with the blanket,"

266. And you'd be in bed with us just—

267. All right, god bless. See you tomorrow.

268. Hasta luego. All right. Bye bye.

269. These are Piramedas from Cohiba.

270. You have from uh, Romeo y Julieta.

271. Wow.

272. Robaina. What would you like?

273. Something strong, medium? I'll take a Partagas.

274. Partagas? Yeah.

275. Okay. Good. Omar, please.

276. Do you know what the actual law is now?

277. A hundred dollars worth of cigars?

278. That's a good start.

279. But, I knew I wanted way more than that.

280. I was gonna have to get resourceful.

281. Still kind of stormy out, you can still hear

282. the wind coming through the window.

283. Makes sleeping kind of difficult,

284. especially at night when it's even stormier

285. and it's just like—it sounds like

286. someone's just doing this—

287. Today, uh, we're not moving around too much.

288. We're just kind of staying in the general

289. area of this fortress called La Cabaña

290. and La Cabaña is this massive behemoth

291. of a fortress.

292. Right outside of the fortress is a

293. museum where they've got all this stuff from

294. the Cuban Missile Crisis.

295. Should be a cool day. Like I said,

296. it's all in one general area and we're still

297. cruising around in these beautiful,

298. old cars which doesn't get any better than that.

299. So, I think that's part of La Cabaña down there.

300. You see the old fort on the water?

301. Oh, that tower thing? Is it a lighthouse?

302. Yeah. Right outside of the fortress is

303. a museum where they've got all this stuff from the

304. Cuban Missile Crisis.

305. Yeah. Which will be kind of cool.

306. Now that's a gun. Now that's a gun.

307. That s what I want to put on the front

308. of the car for traffic.

309. I might just actually put that

310. on the front of my house.

311. Totally, yea. Here ya go.

312. Wined rocket for coastal defense belonging

313. to the Navy.

314. Range, eighty kilometers.

315. So, that could nearly hit America.

316. What's that there, Jack?

317. That's the U two spy plane that

318. they shot down.

319. So, in nineteen sixty-one, President Kennedy's

320. administration was thrown into a state

321. of crisis when it was learned through

322. photos gathered by a U-2 spy plane,

323. that the Soviet Union was planting nuclear missile

324. sites all over Cuba pointed directly at the U. S.

325. Now, the U. S. quickly established

326. a blockade, keeping further arms from

327. entering Cuba.

328. A few weeks later, this pilot,

329. Rudolph Anderson Jr., was flying over Cuba

330. and was shot down and killed.

331. He was the only person who died during

332. the Cuban Missile Crisis.

333. What? It's just, like, here?

334. This is insane. What?

335. This is actually part of an American

336. spy plane and we can touch it. Wow.

337. I could just touch a war relic?

338. Are we allowed up here?

339. So, the way, like, surface to air missiles work

340. is that they don't hit the plane.

341. I know.

342. They get up next to it and then explode.

343. So look, you can see from where...

344. Where—you can see the pattern there,

345. can't ya?

346. Yeah, look at it. But these things were

347. so flimsy anyway.

348. Well, yeah. Look how— you could—I could...

349. They re like a high flying glider.

350. Yeah like, both of us could probably

351. pick that wing up.

352. This is the underneath. Here's one of the wheels.

353. See here as well Jack, look.

354. Yeah. The shrapnel spray.

355. The gun—, all over the

356. thing.

357. Yeah, 'cause it—it's like pellets.

358. Yeah. Yeah.

359. Oh, a Cuban astronaut.

360. See. Yeah, he was a Cuban astronaut

361. for the Russians.

362. What a cool, little rocket. Wow.

363. Here, jump on in, I ll try the other side.

364. Hola.

365. Here's my son, Jack. Hello.

366. Who's looking very Cuban these days.

367. Right, in my galactic shirt.

368. He's a Cuban general on acid.

369. Our Cuban adventure continued.

370. Boris called me and told me he had the

371. most amazing opportunity for us and that was

372. to see the inside of Ernest Hemingway s house.

373. It's not open to the public, so we had

374. to jump on it quick.

375. That meant my dad had to wait a little

376. longer to see John Lennon's memorial.

377. We going to the Lennon Memorial right now?

378. No, right now we're headed to Hemingway's house.

379. Say hello to my little glasses.

380. So, how much do you know about Hemingway?

381. Not a lot.

382. So, here's what you need to know.

383. Ernest Hemingway was pretty much the rock star

384. novelist of his day.

385. He wrote For Whom the Bell Tolls,

386. The Old Man and the Sea, and A Farewell to Arms.

387. The thing about Hemingway was he was

388. a guy you wanted to hang out with,

389. a real man's man.

390. He hunted big game, he ran with the bulls,

391. he partied and he drank and he was

392. a major influence in American literature

393. of the Twentieth Century.

394. Hemingway supposedly came here for like a

395. forty-eight hour layover and never left

396. and like, bought a house here and lived here.

397. Oh, wow. That's cool.

398. His Cuban home is called Finca Vigia

399. which means 'lookout farm'.

400. This is cool.

401. Hello. Hello.

402. Hello, hi. Good morning.

403. I'm Ozzy. This is my son, Jack.

404. Hi, how's it going? Hi Jack.

405. Nice to meet you, Isbel.

406. I'm the Director of the Hemingway Museum.

407. Okay. Okay.

408. Wow. Yeah.

409. How long did he, Hemingway, live here?

410. Hemingway, uh, lived here more than

411. twenty years.

412. Oh yeah. Wow.

413. Wow. Yeah.

414. Now, did Hemingway hunt all these animals?

415. were hunted by Hemingway in the United States.

416. Africa.

417. Here kitty, kitty.

418. You don't let tours inside the house

419. very often, right?

420. No, very unusual.

421. Do you wat to see his creation area?

422. Sure.

423. Is that actually his typewriter?

424. One of them.

425. Oh yeah. That is the explanation.

426. That's a Picasso?

427. Yeah. Wow.

428. Yeah.

429. Mmm hmm.

430. Yeah. Because it's authentic?

431. That's a Picasso? Yeah.

432. You do? Yeah.

433. That's probably worth fortunes.

434. When Hemingway died, did the state take

435. over the property and then turn it into

436. a museum or was it just left for a while?

437. No, uh, well...

438. In nineteen sixty...

439. So, in his will he wanted it to be donated?

440. I mean, listen, whether he left his

441. stuff to the government or fled and the

442. government took it— Well—

443. Ultimately, the government got it.

444. Does the government own his house or—

445. It was in his will that it was to be—

446. They knew that everything in there

447. was super valuable.

448. He had like, a Picasso on the wall.

449. What's all that?

450. Yeah.

451. And it's very funny because sometimes

452. he writes the day.

453. He liked drinking? Yes.

454. Was it fair to say he was an alcoholic?

455. I think he was, yeah.

456. And he was a horrible depressant.

457. And you know, even though you

458. have this impression of like, Hemingway being

459. this amazing author and this real man's man,

460. you could see that he was still really insecure.

461. Hmm.

462. Sure was.

463. Ozzy, you wanna hear some music?

464. Oh, yeah. Listen to some old...

465. Okay. This thing works.

466. Wow. Come on, let s dance.

467. You know, for someone who's like,

468. "I'm not dancing!"

469. You sure got your salsa on with our uh—

470. What are you talking about?

471. —kind tour guide. What are you talking about?

472. Oh yeah, here we go.

473. Ah, you know what?

474. Today is for you.

475. Thank you. Wow, look at that dad.

476. Oh. Everything is natural.

477. I never realized there's so much inside

478. of sugar cane. You wanna try?

479. I'll try, I ll give it a whirl.

480. Very heavy.

481. Right.

482. That's really cool.

483. How are your raw sugarcane parasites?

484. What?

485. Supposedly, raw sugarcane has parasites.

486. Thanks for telling me now!

487. You want some more?

488. One thing we hadn't yet done was

489. eat an authentic Cuban meal

490. and that was on both of our bucket lists.

491. Cuba's known for its rice and beans

492. and the place we went supposedly had

493. the best rice and beans in Cuba.

494. Thank you.

495. That is amazing.

496. This is really good.

497. I like it here. I really do like it here.

498. It is pretty cool to be here.

499. The food in Cuba was awesome and like,

500. I tell you what, Boris set us up right.

501. That guy never sent us astray.

502. Where did you find Boris?

503. He is definitely an impresario.

504. He's like, the man. He's like that guy.

505. He is the man. And he talks like Scarface.

506. Say hello to my little friend.

507. Hey, you eat fast! We did.

508. You eat fast!

509. Boris, so we're going to Lennon s

510. park tomorrow?

511. Yeah. We have the tribute

512. to Lennon at Lennon's park.

513. I'm looking forward to seeing the Lennon.

514. Yeah. So um, I wanna get some—

515. I want to get some cigars. Hey!

516. We're gonna duct tape them to your body,

517. they'll never find them.

518. Yeah, I m not gonna— good grief.

519. I'm not smuggling. Keep dreaming.

520. Around your ankles, around your body.

521. I'll be in jail and you'll be, "Oh, see ya dad!"

522. I'll be smoking 'em, "Oh, I'll see you in court."

523. off! All right. Bye.

524. I guess we're not gonna see John Lennon then.

525. I'm not coming out.

526. Um, all right, I need to talk you out.

527. What—what can I do? Hi.

528. Hi. Hi.

529. Hi. So, I know something that you don't.

530. Um, you ready? Yeah. Yeah.

531. You ready? Are—are you? Bu—

532. Now, where are we going today?

533. Not the cigar deal.

534. At some point we will, but we're gonna

535. start the day off right.

536. Go on. John Lennon.

537. Oh my god!

538. I'm looking forward to seeing him.

539. And then um, we're gonna go to the

540. Yellow Submarine Bar. Oh, okay.

541. It's better than like going to the Rolling Stones bar.

542. Yeah, okay.

543. No.

544. Windy today. My wigs flying off.

545. Put the roof up.

546. So, straight up? Yeah.

547. They risked their freedom you know.

548. It was tricky.

549. Really? Yeah.

550. Okay, here's the deal with Cuba

551. and rock and roll.

552. After the Cuban Missile Crisis in

553. nineteen sixty-two, Fidel Castro outlawed

554. rock and roll as the music of the enemy.

555. The ban was eventually lifted in nineteen sixty-six

556. but rock and roll remained mostly underground and

557. in two thousand and four, Fidel Castro made a speech

558. honoring the one and only John Lennon,

559. casting Lennon as a man who was born

560. a rebel and a constant victim of U. S. harassment.

561. Oh, here's the park. Okay.

562. Groovy, groovy.

563. Do you know who attended the opening?

564. Who? Fidel.

565. Oh really?

566. Yeah. And that was the time that Fidel said,

567. "This guy, he was a dreamer and I think

568. I'm a dreamer too."

569. Here he is.

570. That's really cool.

571. Yeah.

572. Well, I gotta tell you one of the

573. highlights of the thing, seeing the Lennon statue.

574. I just find it such a strange thing—

575. You know it is a strange thing,

576. John Lennon in Havana. Yeah.

577. When you learn the history of it as

578. to why Castro put it there, was because he-

579. He was a rebel. He was a rebel. Exactly!

580. And I think Castro probably liked the fact

581. that John Lennon pissed off the American government.

582. Were you team John Lennon or team Paul McCartney?

583. Both. Yeah.

584. I mean, Lennon and McCartney for me,

585. were two of the greatest things that ever happened.

586. This is my friend, P. J. Hello.

587. He's a rock expert, journalist.

588. Across the street from the park was a

589. small pub called The Yellow Submarine

590. where some of Cuba's musicians and rock critics

591. had gathered to meet my father.

592. If it wasn't for The Beatles, I wouldn't be here now.

593. I was—as a young boy, they captured my

594. heart and when I met Paul McCartney

595. for the first time it was like me meeting God, you know.

596. I never met Lennon.

597. I get sad when I see it, like that memorial,

598. because a man who gave so much pleasure to

599. so many people through his music—just very sad.

600. I—I do care about the earth, the people.

601. It—it would be nice if we could all

602. get along, you know.

603. It would be a much better world.

604. I mean Cu—this is my first time in Cuba

605. and it's fantastic.

606. We're really having a fun time here.

607. I have—I have a question for— ya know,

608. in America, you're led to believe,

609. "Oh, there's no music here," it was outlawed.

610. What was the music scene like when things

611. were hard here and how were you getting music?

612. Mmm hmm.

613. Mmm hmm.

614. Um, there used to be—

615. There used to be uh, lots of bars like this

616. around England when I first started, but no more.

617. It's good—it's good that you have these

618. because people can jam, can't they?

619. Come on and play, just play.

620. For me, this is a great honor to play in

621. the presence of Ozzy Osbourne,

622. one of my idols.

623. For me, it's— I feel emotion to play your music.

624. Mmm hmm.

625. Yeah.

626. I know he would.

627. You know, this place is great,

628. I've had such a good time here.

629. And people love music so much.

630. Now, I heard that if you got caught with

631. certain music, you could— you could get

632. essentially arrested. Yeah.

633. Wow.

634. Tom Jones? Tom Jones.

635. I just recently travelled with him on

636. a plane back to England.

637. Lovely man. He's a great singer.

638. I said something to him, I said,

639. " Hey Tom, did you get on with Englebert Humperdink?"

640. He said, "I hate him."

641. Hey.

642. How are you, sir?

643. We, well um, it's the last day,

644. we've got a lot of stuff—Ooh!

645. I like the purple gasses, purple jacket.

646. I like that.

647. Well, I have blue jacket, blue glasses.

648. Ah! You look good.

649. So, it's our last day, we got a lot

650. of things on the table but unfortunately,

651. one thing has to go.

652. Now, here are the options and I thought

653. we'd make a little game out of it.

654. Here I have a, uh, a one cook coin.

655. Cuban currency. Wh—wh—what? Yeah.

656. Although, it does not have a head or a tail,

657. so it has a shield and a heart.

658. If you win, we get to go to a war museum

659. where they have a ton of Russian tanks and whatever.

660. Mmm hmm.

661. And if I win we get to go to this private

662. cigar room where they have this insane

663. collection of cigars. Not cigars as well!

664. So, head or tails? Or, okay you pick.

665. Do you want shield or heart?

666. Shield.

667. Oh, it's heart! Oh

668. Cigars it is. All right. Let's go.

669. cigars.

670. The cool thing about this cigar shop

671. is that it was located in this really cool, old fort.

672. I thought my dad would really dig it.

673. Apparently, after the revolution,

674. Fidel's right hand man, Che Guevara,

675. used it as his headquarters.

676. Wow, this place is massive. It doesn't end.

677. There's the cigar shop, right up here.

678. Oh you and cigars!

679. I don't smoke cigars! It's okay!

680. I don't sing but I go to your shows all of the time.

681. You and these cigars, man.

682. Listen, I m just gonna go in, I wanna see,

683. maybe just buy one of like, his home rolled

684. ones and we'll go from there.

685. Where—where is his shop?

686. It's just up here. Come on, let's jump out.

687. There's not a cigar shop here.

688. It's supposed to be here.

689. Well, it's supposed to be.

690. Try the door. It's closed.

691. Oh, let's get the out of here.

692. Let's go back to the hotel. Grumpy.

693. I'm not grumpy. You're cigar mad!

694. I'm gonna come smoke a cigar in your

695. bedroom and make you pay the two-hundred-dollar fee.

696. I might not have cigars, yet, but for our

697. final night in Cuba I did get me and my

698. dad an authentic Cuban Guayabera shirt.

699. off!

700. Okay, see you later.

701. Hola. Oh, what's that?

702. Ah yes, I ve been to the drycleaners

703. and I went to the drycleaners and

704. I brought you your shirts and your—

705. Wow! That's cool.

706. And it will go perfectly with your jacket.

707. Abso—lutely, son!

708. All right, I m gonna go put mine on.

709. It's good.

710. TA DA

711. Local boy now!

712. Live it up in Cuba. Cuba! Good boy.

713. Let me fix your collar.

714. There you go. The boys.

715. Ready. Cuba, here we come.

716. So, this restaurant we're going to is supposed

717. to be one of the best restaurants in Havana.

718. It looks like a house. Really? Wow.

719. I've got educated in five days here.

720. But I really like the vibe here.

721. No more tears.

722. It's the restaurant.

723. This is a restaurant? This is.

724. Before we came to Cuba, I searched the internet

725. for good places to eat.

726. Now, they don't exactly have Yelp here

727. so it was kind of difficult, but I found

728. these Paladar restaurants that people

729. run out of their homes; totally underground

730. and illegal until the nineteen nineties.

731. But now, they've turned into these

732. swanky places to eat and the one we're

733. headed to is supposedly awesome.

734. Hola. How are you?

735. Good, thank you. Go upstairs.

736. Okay. Cool, thank you. Wow.

737. Look at this place.

738. We have to go up four flight of stairs.

739. What? This is cool.

740. What's cool? This sucks.

741. This is awesome.

742. This is a joke.

743. hell.

744. Hi, good evening. Hello.

745. Welcome to Noveria. Thank you.

746. Any questions with the menu and

747. I can help you.

748. Can I get the tuna tartare to start?

749. Thank you.

750. I'll get the avocado salad to start with.

751. Fantastic. What a cool vibe, you know?

752. Mm hmm.

753. And today we have our uh, sushi

754. with a vegetable cream. I hope you like it.

755. Thank you very much. Thank you.

756. My pleasure.

757. Looks good.

758. As fun as it is to travel with you,

759. you are the worst to eat adventurous food with.

760. If I don't recognize it, I don't want to eat it.

761. 'Cause I've done that, you go, "Oh, this looks nice."

762. The was that?

763. It was still breathing.

764. Is it better with hair or without hair?

765. With hair.

766. It was our last night in Havana and

767. we had an awesome Cuban meal.

768. The is this?

769. Or at least I thought so. I'm not crazy about it.

770. And I wanted to cap the night off with

771. some salsa dancing.

772. But, convincing my dad was more of a tango.

773. I kill you. I kill you.

774. We're gonna go somewhere really

775. fun after this.

776. I'm not dancing.

777. No. How about, we go to a place where

778. people might be dancing. Yes.

779. And if they are dancing, we watch and

780. if all of the sudden the rhythm of the

781. music starts to take control of your hips...

782. No. Thank you.

783. I've got control of my feet and I ll walk out the door.

784. This tastes like.

785. That—

786. —is probably one of the greatest desserts

787. I've ever had.

788. Good, you can have one for me.

789. Just a little bit. That—they can-

790. No. No. No.

791. You're gonna work it off on the

792. dance floor. I don't want to!

793. Listen, out of the two of us, you're the

794. most musical, for one.

795. Yes. Yes. You dance on stage.

796. But you can dance! You dance on stage.

797. No I don't! Yes, you do.

798. Hey, hey. All dancing is is jumping

799. around like a.

800. All right, if you won't—if you won t

801. dance with me, just have a little bit.

802. I'm not dancing. Okay.

803. You wanna— you—you are full of it.

804. It's okay. Okay, fine. That's fine.

805. I found the food quite exquisite.

806. Oh, good for you. You can have mine next time.

807. I think I actually did have some of yours.

808. This is an unbelievable restaurant.

809. I was full from dinner and I knew

810. I wasn't gonna get my dad to go dancing.

811. So, I had thought we would end the night

812. doing what he wanted to do.

813. Voice on TV: It's American G. I.'s

814. against Nazi killers. In a fight to the death...

815. Allied forces storm the fatherland.

816. I love that we go all the way to Cuba

817. and you still find time to watch some

818. World War II documentary.

819. Well, I'm obsessed with it!

820. So, we were flying out in a matter of hours

821. but I was determined to get my cigars.

822. Someone at the hotel told me how to get some

823. black market cigars.

824. It was my last chance to get some and

825. I had to risk it.

826. A part of my excitement about coming to Cuba

827. is for the cigars.

828. We're in old town right now and supposedly

829. there s this thing called Cooperative

830. where people who've worked at cigar

831. factories for twenty years sell you cigars

832. for like fifty percent off.

833. From what I hear, people come up and be like,

834. "Hey, you want cigars? You want cigars?"

835. Tobacco?

836. Conoces tobacco?

837. Tobacco. Okay.

838. Conoces tobacco?

839. Oh, uh, yes uh, go to the—the left.

840. Uh huh.

841. And then right— the market.

842. I'll find them there? Yes. Yes.

843. Mucho gracias. Mucho gracias.

844. I'll give you one of these.

845. Conoces tobacco?

846. Lo and behold, I got to go into this building

847. and it took me around a corner and

848. I bought some cigars there.

849. They pulled them out of an air vent.

850. We're in luck. The eagle has landed.

851. Hola.

852. Hello, Jack. How you doing?

853. All right. I'm gonna put this—

854. Ready—ready.

855. I'm gonna put these in your luggage.

856. What are they? Nothing.

857. What? Don't worry about it.

858. What do you mean? What the is it?

859. Don't worry about it, it's fine.

860. If they ask you, tell them that they're yours.

861. off! What are they?

862. Don't worry about it. Are you stowing your—

863. Listen I found—it's high grade,

864. industrial quality cigars.

865. Jack, I want you to ask me before

866. you do these things.

867. You said yes.

868. But I don't want to be a smuggler!

869. Well, all in all... Are you smoking it here?

870. —Cuba, was a hit.

871. off with that thing in my house.

872. What the?

873. Well, I m out of here.

874. Bye.

875. Mum! Jack's smoking cigars in the house.