1. - GOOD MORNING.Copy !req
2. OH. DID WE GET
MORE PRODUCTS IN?Copy !req
3. "I LOVE YOU BEARY MUCH."Copy !req
4. WE SELL SOME CHEESY CRAP.Copy !req
5. - MY BOYFRIEND GAVE THAT
TO ME.Copy !req
6. - AND IT IS BEARY SWEET.Copy !req
7. I LOVE PUNS.Copy !req
8. DID YOUR BOYFRIEND GET THIS
FOR YOU AT THE MAUL?Copy !req
9. MAUL.
RRARGH.Copy !req
10. - SIR, COULD I TALK
TO YOU FOR A MINUTE?Copy !req
11. - OH, SURE, YEAH.
WHAT DO YOU NEED?Copy !req
12. - I JUST NEEDED THAT TO STOP.Copy !req
13. - HEY, I DIDN'T KNOW YOU GUYS
CELEBRATED VALENTINE'S DAY.Copy !req
14. - OH, YES. SOME PEOPLE CALL IT
SWEETHEARTS' DAY.Copy !req
15. IT'S A VERY BIG DEAL HERE.Copy !req
16. - NOT TO THE INDIANS WHO REFUSE
TO CHEAPEN THE NOTION OF LOVECopy !req
17. WITH WESTERN
COMMERCIALIZATION—Copy !req
18. CHOCOLATES, FLOWERS,Copy !req
19. FAT, FLYING INFANTS
ARMED WITH CROSSBOWS.Copy !req
20. AH, YES, SOMEONE ELSE
HAS BEEN DUPED INTO WASTINGCopy !req
21. THEIR HARD-EARNED MONEYCopy !req
22. ON WHAT ARE ESSENTIALLY
PLANT GENITALS.Copy !req
23. - ACTUALLY, RAJIV,
THIS IS FROM VIMI TO YOU.Copy !req
24. SHE "WUVS" ME?Copy !req
25. I "WUV" HER TOO.Copy !req
26. - ACTUALLY, THEY'RE FOR MANMEET,
BUT IT'S NICE TO SEECopy !req
27. YOU HAVE A HEART
IN THERE SOMEWHERE.Copy !req
28. - YES, A HEART THAT PUMPS BLOOD
TO MY BRAINCopy !req
29. SO I CAN MAKE
RATIONAL DECISIONSCopy !req
30. AND NOT GET SUCKED INTO
THIS TAWDRY, MATERIALISTIC—Copy !req
31. - I WAS JOKING.
THEY REALLY ARE FROM VIMI.Copy !req
32. - MY PUMPKIN?
MY DARLING?Copy !req
33. - OH, NOW I FEEL REALLY BADCopy !req
34. BECAUSE THEY'RE ACTUALLY
FOR MANMEET.Copy !req
35. - WHAT DO I CARE?Copy !req
36. I AM A STONE.Copy !req
37. I HAVE BEEN JOKING
WITH YOU THIS ENTIRE TIME.Copy !req
38. - I HAVE DELIVERY
FOR RAJIV GIDWANI.Copy !req
39. - DOUBLE-CHECK THAT CARD,
YOU SON OF A BITCH.Copy !req
40. I CAN'T DO THIS ANYMORE.Copy !req
41. - MAUL...Copy !req
42. THE BEAR IS MAULING.Copy !req
43. - HELLO.Copy !req
44. OKAY, THANK YOU VERY MUCH,
PLEASE. GOOD-BYE.Copy !req
45. - YES, SIR,
I DO HAVE TWO EYES.Copy !req
46. YES, SIR,
I ACTUALLY HAVE 20/20 VISION.Copy !req
47. FORGET ABOUT IT.Copy !req
48. - HEY, TODD.
HEY, TODD.Copy !req
49. CAN I ASK YOU SOMETHING?Copy !req
50. - OH, WAIT. IS THIS ABOUT WOMEN
OR ABOUT WORK?Copy !req
51. - OH, COME ON, MAN, HAVE
I EVER ASKED YOU ABOUT WORK?Copy !req
52. - WHAT'S UP?Copy !req
53. - OKAY, I HAVE A DILEMMA.Copy !req
54. SEE, BOTH DEBBIE
AND ASHLYNN EXPECT MECopy !req
55. TO TAKE THEM OUT
FOR VALENTINE'S DAY.Copy !req
56. - OH, IS THE DILEMMA
THAT THEY'RE IN AMERICACopy !req
57. AND YOU'RE HERE?
- NO.Copy !req
58. I VIDEO-CHAT WITH THEM
AFTER WORK.Copy !req
59. I TALK TO DEBBIE ON FRIDAYSCopy !req
60. AND TO ASHLYNN
LATE AT NIGHT SATURDAYSCopy !req
61. AFTER SHE CLOSES
THE COLD STONE CREAMERY.Copy !req
62. I JUST CAN'T DECIDE WHO TO PICK.
- WELL, YOU COULD TRY JUGGLING.Copy !req
63. TWO DATES THE SAME NIGHT.Copy !req
64. I TRIED IT ONCE—Copy !req
65. TWO GIRLS, TWO DINNERS,Copy !req
66. TWO AWKWARD REJECTIONS
AT THE DOOR.Copy !req
67. BUT I GOT A GREAT STORY
OUT OF IT.Copy !req
68. - WHAT'S THE STORY?Copy !req
69. - WELL, THAT WAS IT.Copy !req
70. - FINE! FINE!
HAVE IT YOUR WAY.Copy !req
71. THANK YOU FOR CALLING!Copy !req
72. - ANGER MANAGEMENT IS ESSENTIAL
FOR GOOD CUSTOMER SERVICE.Copy !req
73. - THANKS, GUPTA.Copy !req
74. THIS IS JUST HOW I WANTED
TO SPEND MY BREAK.Copy !req
75. - OH, TEMPER, TEMPER.Copy !req
76. - UH, NOW, THIS IS A RELAXATION
VIDEO THEY SHOWED USCopy !req
77. BACK WHEN I STARTED
AT MID AMERICA NOVELTIES.Copy !req
78. AND, ACTUALLY, I THINK
IT'S RIGHT UP YOUR ALLEY.Copy !req
79. - NAMASTE.Copy !req
80. THAT'S INDIAN
FOR "GREETINGS."Copy !req
81. - TODD, THERE
IS NO SUCH LANGUAGE AS INDIAN.Copy !req
82. - I KNOW.
- YOGA IS THE GREATEST GIFTCopy !req
83. OF THESE SPIRITUAL,
MAGICAL PEOPLE.Copy !req
84. - WE'RE INDIANS,
NOT ELVES.Copy !req
85. - YOGA IS AN EFFECTIVE WAYCopy !req
86. TO RELIEVE STRESS.Copy !req
87. ENERGY IS EVERYWHERE.Copy !req
88. AND EVERYTHING IS ENERGY.Copy !req
89. AND AT THE SAME TIME...Copy !req
90. IT IS NOTHING.Copy !req
91. AND THEREFORE IT IS NOWHERE.Copy !req
92. - WHAT THE HELL
IS SHE TALKING ABOUT?Copy !req
93. - THE BEAUTY OF YOGACopy !req
94. IS IN ITS SIMPLICITY.Copy !req
95. IT WAS INVENTED BY A PEOPLECopy !req
96. WHO HAD NOTHING
BUT A DIRT FLOOR,Copy !req
97. AND LOOK
WHAT THEY CAME UP WITH.Copy !req
98. - OH!
- NAMASTE.Copy !req
99. - OKAY, WELL, I GUESS
THAT WAS A LITTLE LESS OFFENSIVECopy !req
100. WHEN I WAS WATCHING IT
BACK IN KANSASCopy !req
101. WHEN I DIDN'T KNOW
ANY INDIANS, BUT, UH...Copy !req
102. I'VE FALLEN IN LOVE
WITH YOU MAGICAL BASTARDS.Copy !req
103. YOU KNOW, I HAD YOUR JOB.Copy !req
104. I'LL JUST TRAIN YOU MYSELF.Copy !req
105. I WANT THAT
BIRD FEEDER WHERE THE CATSCopy !req
106. ARE TRYING TO CATCH THE BIRDS.Copy !req
107. - OKAY, MA'AM, IF YOU COULD
JUST GIVE ME THE ITEM—Copy !req
108. - NOW BIRDS IS SPELLED
B-U-R-D-S.Copy !req
109. GET IT?Copy !req
110. B-U-R-D-S.Copy !req
111. - OKAY,
IF YOU COULD JUST TELL ME—Copy !req
112. - THE CATS WROTE IT THEMSELVES.Copy !req
113. - OKAY, I GET IT.
- MM-HMM.Copy !req
114. WHAT?
WHA—WHAT ARE YOU SAYING?Copy !req
115. NUMBER? WHAT—YOUR DAMN ACCENT
IS SO THICK!Copy !req
116. - WELL, MAYBE
YOU COULD UNDERSTAND MECopy !req
117. IF YOU SCOOPED THAT CLAM CHOWDER
OUT FROM BETWEEN YOUR EARS.Copy !req
118. RED SOX SUCK.
- OKAY.Copy !req
119. YOU JUST INSULTED THE CUSTOMER.Copy !req
120. IF YOU FEEL LIKE
YOU'RE GONNA LOSE YOUR COOL,Copy !req
121. JUST TRANSFER THE CALL TO ME.Copy !req
122. OH, ONE THING,Copy !req
123. VERY IMPORTANT,Copy !req
124. YANKEES SUCK.Copy !req
125. OKAY, PINKY,
LET'S DO THIS.Copy !req
126. - IF YOU'LL HOLD, PLEASE,Copy !req
127. I'D LIKE TO TRANSFER YOU
TO MY MANAGER.Copy !req
128. - BUT, PINKY,
WE HAVEN'T EVEN STARTED YET.Copy !req
129. - YOUR CALL
IS VERY IMPORTANT TO US.Copy !req
130. PLEASE STAY ON THE LINE.Copy !req
131. YOUR ESTIMATED WAIT TIME
IS FIVE MINUTES.Copy !req
132. - OKAY.
WHO'S LEFT?Copy !req
133. - COME ON, GUPTA.
- STAY COOL, MAN.Copy !req
134. DON'T LET HIM GET TO YOU.
- YOU CAN DO IT.Copy !req
135. I WANT MY MONEY BACK.Copy !req
136. DON'T YOU GET THAT?
HOW DUMB ARE YOU?Copy !req
137. - I AM SORRY, SIR.Copy !req
138. I CAN ONLY OFFER YOU
A STORE CREDIT.Copy !req
139. - WELL, YOU LISTEN TO THIS,
M. NIGHT.Copy !req
140. IF I DON'T GET MY REFUND,Copy !req
141. THE TWIST OF THIS MOVIE'S
GONNA BE MY FOOT UP YOUR ASS.Copy !req
142. - I—Copy !req
143. SORRY, SIR,
BUT WE CANNOT REFUND PRODUCTSCopy !req
144. THAT HAVE BEEN PERSONALIZED.Copy !req
145. - HOW'S THIS FOR PERSONALIZED?Copy !req
146. YOU'RE A MORON,
AND A MONKEY COULD DO YOUR JOB.Copy !req
147. - SIR, IF I COULD PLEASE PUT YOU
ON HOLD,Copy !req
148. MY MANAGER WILL BE ABLE
TO HELP YOU TAKE CARE OF THIS.Copy !req
149. YEAH!Copy !req
150. - YES.
- WHOO!Copy !req
151. - HEY, TODD.
- HMM?Copy !req
152. - I FIGURED OUT HOW TO JUGGLE
BOTH VALENTINE'S DATES.Copy !req
153. - AHA.
- OKAY.Copy !req
154. DEBBIE AT 6:00Copy !req
155. AND ASHLYNN AT 9:00.Copy !req
156. I JUST NEED TO BORROW
YOUR LAPTOP.Copy !req
157. - UH, YEAH, SURE.
WHY?Copy !req
158. NO, I DON'T WANT TO KNOW.Copy !req
159. I'M NOT SURE I WANT TO KNOW
HOW MY LAPTOPCopy !req
160. FIGURES INTO YOUR LOVE LIFE.
- NO, WE GO TO VIDEO CHATCopy !req
161. AND WATCH A MOVIE TOGETHER.Copy !req
162. BUT PLEASE TELL ME
WHAT YOU WERE THINKING.Copy !req
163. THAT SOUNDS MUCH BETTER.Copy !req
164. - SHUT UP!
SHUT UP!Copy !req
165. SHUT UP!
SHUT UP FOREVER!Copy !req
166. - SIR, SHALL I CUE UP
THE RACIST YOGA TAPE AGAIN?Copy !req
167. - NO.Copy !req
168. - TODD...Copy !req
169. I JUST TRANSFERRED
THAT CALL TO YOU.Copy !req
170. DID IT NOT GO THROUGH?
- IT'S TOO LATE, GUPTA.Copy !req
171. PACK YOUR THINGS.Copy !req
172. YOU CAN'T SCREAM AT CUSTOMERS.Copy !req
173. - TODD IS RIGHT.Copy !req
174. THIS IS A TEACHABLE MOMENT
FOR EVERYONE.Copy !req
175. AN ANGER LEVEL OF FOUR
CAN ESCALATE TO A TENCopy !req
176. IN THE BLINK
OF AN EYE, TEAM.Copy !req
177. - THE ONLY ONE
I NEED TO TEACH IS YOU.Copy !req
178. YOU STEPPED WAY OVER THE LINE,
ALL RIGHT?Copy !req
179. YOU'RE SUSPENDED
FOR ONE WEEK, NO PAY.Copy !req
180. GET OUT OF HERE.
- WAIT, SIR, PLEASE.Copy !req
181. I THINK YOU ARE THIS CLOSE
TO FIRING HIM.Copy !req
182. IF YOU NEED SOMETHING
TO PUSH IT OVER THE TOP,Copy !req
183. CONSIDER THESE OFFENSES.Copy !req
184. YESTERDAY HE SUCKED
ALL THE JELLY OUT OF A DOUGHNUT.Copy !req
185. HE FREQUENTLY WEARS A BELT
WITH MAKESHIFT HOLES.Copy !req
186. HE CLEARLY HAS MADE NO ATTEMPT
TO UNDERSTAND OUR CULTURE.Copy !req
187. OH, I AM SORRY.Copy !req
188. I HAVE SKIPPED OVER
TO THE PART ABOUT YOU.Copy !req
189. TODD.Copy !req
190. - GUPTA...Copy !req
191. PACK YOUR THINGS.Copy !req
192. - KATIE, BUJA, COME ON.Copy !req
193. WELL, THAT'S EVERYTHING.Copy !req
194. OH, THIS IS STARTING
TO FEEL VERY REAL NOW.Copy !req
195. YOU KNOW, I THINK
I'VE LEARNED MY LESSON.Copy !req
196. - GUPTA, WAIT.
- OH, THANK GOODNESS.Copy !req
197. YOU KNOW, MY HEART WAS RACING.Copy !req
198. - HEADSET.Copy !req
199. - OH.Copy !req
200. OF COURSE.Copy !req
201. NOTHING ELSE TO SAY,
YOU KNOW.Copy !req
202. DRAG IT OUT.Copy !req
203. IF I STAY ANY LONGER,
MY—MY FRIENDS MAY DEFEND ME,Copy !req
204. WHICH THEY SHOULDN'T.Copy !req
205. BUT IF SOMEONE WANTED
TO SAY SOMETHING,Copy !req
206. NOW WOULD BE THE TIME,
'CAUSE I'M GETTINGCopy !req
207. PRETTY CLOSE TO THE DOOR.
LOOK HOW CLOSE I...Copy !req
208. NO.Copy !req
209. WHA—WHAT WAS THAT, MANMEET?Copy !req
210. DID YOU SAY SOMETHING?Copy !req
211. - NO.Copy !req
212. - I JUST FOUND OUT
THAT I HAVE TO WORK TONIGHT.Copy !req
213. - OH, SHOOT,
I GUESS I HAVE TO CANCELCopy !req
214. ALL THE PLANS I MADE FOR US.
- OH, SAVE IT.Copy !req
215. I DON'T CARE ABOUT GOING OUT
ON VALENTINE'S EITHER.Copy !req
216. IT'S ALL JUST A BIG SCAM.Copy !req
217. - IS THIS A TEST?Copy !req
218. - NO. YOU DON'T HAVE
TO MAKE ANY PLANS.Copy !req
219. - NOW IS IT A TEST?
- NO.Copy !req
220. I REALLY DON'T CARE.Copy !req
221. - YOU'RE SURE IT'S NOT A TEST?Copy !req
222. I MEAN, IF I ASK YOU,
YOU HAVE TO TELL.Copy !req
223. IT'S LIKE UNDERCOVER COPS.Copy !req
224. - I THOUGHT YOU SAID
YOU SUSPENDED GUPTA.Copy !req
225. - YEAH, I DID.Copy !req
226. - WHO AM I?
- WHAT'S GOING ON?Copy !req
227. GUPTA, WHY ARE YOU HERE?Copy !req
228. YOU'RE SUSPENDED.
- FROM WORK.Copy !req
229. I'M NOT WORKING.
I'M SOCIALIZING.Copy !req
230. IT'S LIKE A PAID VACATION,Copy !req
231. EXCEPT I'M NOT GETTING PAID.Copy !req
232. - THIS CAFETERIA IS FOR PEOPLE
WHO WORK HERE, ALL RIGHT?Copy !req
233. THIS WEEK YOU DON'T.
YOU NEED TO LEAVE NOW.Copy !req
234. - OKAY.
I'LL JUST GET MY THINGS AGAIN.Copy !req
235. KATIE, BUJA.Copy !req
236. IF SOMEONE WANTS TO SPEAK
IN MY DEFENSE,Copy !req
237. I'LL WAIT BECAUSE I KNOW
YOU'RE CHEWING YOUR FOOD,Copy !req
238. AND YOU DON'T WANT TO TALK
WITH YOUR MOUTHS FULL.Copy !req
239. YOU PEOPLE ARE KILLING ME!Copy !req
240. YOU LOOK SO BEAUTIFUL, DEBBIE.Copy !req
241. - THANKS, MY SWEETHEART.Copy !req
242. - ONE, TWO, THREE...Copy !req
243. BITE.Copy !req
244. MMM.Copy !req
245. IF YOU'RE READY, MY DARLING,
I'LL START THE MOVIE.Copy !req
246. - MM.
YES, I'M READY, HONEY.Copy !req
247. WHAT'S THE MATTER?Copy !req
248. - UM, I WAS JUST THINKING.Copy !req
249. IT'S A LONG MOVIE.Copy !req
250. MAYBE WE SHOULD BOTH GO
TO THE BATHROOM.Copy !req
251. - YOU ARE SO CONSIDERATE.Copy !req
252. ASHLYNN,
YOU'RE EARLY.Copy !req
253. - NO, I'M NOT, MEATLOAF.Copy !req
254. - YES, IT'S 6:00 THERE.Copy !req
255. - NO, SILLY,
IT'S 9:00 IN NEW YORK.Copy !req
256. - ISN'T THIS ROMANTIC?
YES.Copy !req
257. - SURE IS.Copy !req
258. - I'M SO HAPPY WE'RE SPENDING
VALENTINE'S DAY TOGETHER.Copy !req
259. ME TOO.
- TAKE MY ADVICE.Copy !req
260. DON'T GO OUT
WITH THAT MAN TOMORROW NIGHT.Copy !req
261. HE'S A PHONY.
- I WISH I WAS THERECopy !req
262. IN YOUR CITY, YOU KNOW,
NEAR THAT LARGE,Copy !req
263. NAVIGABLE BODY OF WATER.Copy !req
264. - OH, I WOULD KILL FOR YOU
TO BE HERE IN SAN FRANCISCO.Copy !req
265. - I WISH YOU WERE HERE
IN NEW YORK.Copy !req
266. - SOMEDAY, BABY.Copy !req
267. - WHAT'S UP, GUPTA?Copy !req
268. GUPTA?Copy !req
269. WHAT ARE YOU DOING OUT HERE?Copy !req
270. - JUST WAITING FOR MY SUSPENSION
TO BE OVER.Copy !req
271. - WELL, YOU GOT FOUR MORE DAYS.
GO HOME.Copy !req
272. - I CAN'T. I WAS ALREADY BEHIND
ON THE RENT FOR MY APARTMENT.Copy !req
273. I MADE THE MISTAKE OF ASKING
MY LANDLORD FOR MORE TIME,Copy !req
274. SINCE YOU SUSPENDED ME,
AND HE KICKED ME OUT.Copy !req
275. - WELL, CAN'T YOU GO
TO YOUR PARENTS' PLACE?Copy !req
276. - THEY MOVED BACK TO DELHI.Copy !req
277. - SO WHERE ARE YOU
GONNA SLEEP TONIGHT?Copy !req
278. - AH, DON'T WORRY ABOUT ME.
THIS CONCRETE WILL BE MY BED.Copy !req
279. IF I'M LUCKY,
IT WILL RAIN IN THE MORNING,Copy !req
280. AND THAT WILL BE MY SHOWER.Copy !req
281. - OKAY, GUPTA,
I KNOW YOU'RE TRYINGCopy !req
282. TO MAKE ME FEEL BAD,Copy !req
283. BUT THIS IS YOUR FAULT.Copy !req
284. - YES, I KNOW.Copy !req
285. THE LAST THING I WANT
IS FOR YOU TO FEEL BAD.Copy !req
286. ACTUALLY, THE LAST THING
I WANT IS TO SLEEPCopy !req
287. ON THE STREET
OR GET MURDERED IN MY SLEEP.Copy !req
288. SO FROM BOTTOM UP,Copy !req
289. I GUESS IT GOES STREET MURDER,Copy !req
290. GUTTER BED,
TODD SAD.Copy !req
291. - ALL RIGHT,
JUST FOR TONIGHT.Copy !req
292. - I'LL GET MY THINGS!Copy !req
293. I GOT MY THINGS.Copy !req
294. - HELLO?Copy !req
295. - MORNING, MISS MORROW.
THIS IS REX.Copy !req
296. - HEY, MANMEET.Copy !req
297. WHY DO WE NEED A MOVIE?Copy !req
298. WHY DON'T WE MAKE OUR OWN SHOW?Copy !req
299. - WHOA, DEBBIE!
- WHO'S DEBBIE?Copy !req
300. - NOTHING, BABY.Copy !req
301. - WHO WAS THAT? IS THERE
SOMEONE THERE WITH YOU?Copy !req
302. - I HEAR ANOTHER WOMAN.Copy !req
303. - OKAY, TURN ME AROUND.Copy !req
304. I WANT TO SEE HER.Copy !req
305. - I DON'T THINK—
- DO IT, MEATLOAF.Copy !req
306. - UGH, YOU'VE GOT
TO BE KIDDING ME.Copy !req
307. YOU'RE CHEATING ON ME
WITH HER?Copy !req
308. - OH, NO, YOU GOT IT TWISTED.Copy !req
309. HE'S CHEATING ON ME
WITH YOU.Copy !req
310. - OKAY, OKAY.
PLEASE.Copy !req
311. PLEASE, I AM—
I AM SORRY IT HAPPENED THIS WAY,Copy !req
312. BUT YOU'RE SO SPECIAL.Copy !req
313. I DON'T WANT TO LOSE YOU.
- LOSE WHO?Copy !req
314. - YEAH. WHICH ONE OF US
ARE YOU TALKING TO?Copy !req
315. - YOUUUU.Copy !req
316. - OH, WHAT A DAY.Copy !req
317. - THANK YOU FOR LETTING ME
BORROW THESE.Copy !req
318. THEY'RE SOFT,
BUT THEY CREEP.Copy !req
319. - YEAH.
THOSE ARE YOURS NOW.Copy !req
320. - OKAY.Copy !req
321. GOOD NIGHT.Copy !req
322. - TODD!Copy !req
323. BUT I CAN'T TIE YOU UP?Copy !req
324. - YOU'RE LOOKING FOR A CHEAPER
APARTMENT TODAY, RIGHT?Copy !req
325. - YEP.
I'M ON IT.Copy !req
326. OOH, FINALLY.Copy !req
327. - GUPTA.Copy !req
328. - WHAT? I ORDERED
WHILE YOU WERE SHOWERING.Copy !req
329. MELON WEDGE?Copy !req
330. - HEY, MANMEET.Copy !req
331. HOW'D YOUR JUGGLE GO?Copy !req
332. - OH, THEY FOUND OUT
ABOUT EACH OTHER.Copy !req
333. - AHH.
- HUGE FIGHT, MAN.Copy !req
334. - I'M SORRY, MAN,
BUT THAT'S WHAT HAPPENS.Copy !req
335. YOU GO FOR TWO WOMEN,
NOW YOU GOT NEITHER.Copy !req
336. - OH, NO,
I GOT ONE.Copy !req
337. TURNS OUT ASHLYNN LIKES
TO FIGHT FOR HER MAN.Copy !req
338. AND GUESS WHAT.
WE'RE EXCLUSIVE NOW.Copy !req
339. - HEY.
- BUT DEBBIE'S SO UPSET.Copy !req
340. SHE CUT OFF HER HAIR
IN FRONT OF ME ON CAMERA.Copy !req
341. SHE HAS A LUMPY HEAD.
I'M JUST GLAD I FOUND OUT NOW.Copy !req
342. - SIR, IF YOU'D LIKE
TO FILL OUT THE INCIDENT REPORTCopy !req
343. ABOUT GUPTA,
I HAVE THE CALL CUED UP.Copy !req
344. - YEAH, LET'S DO THIS.Copy !req
345. - MID AMERICA NOVELTIES.
WHAT DO YOU WANT?Copy !req
346. - I'M CALLING TO ORDER A PAIR
OF THOSE TRUCK NUTS.Copy !req
347. - FOR GOD'S SAKE, WHY?Copy !req
348. - IT SOUNDS
LIKE HE'S ALREADY MAD.Copy !req
349. - YES.
HE'S OUT OF CONTROL, SIR.Copy !req
350. THIS TRUCK NUTS GENTLEMAN
HAS DONE NOTHING TO PROVOKE HIM.Copy !req
351. - YOU KNOW WHAT?
PLAY THE PREVIOUS CALL.Copy !req
352. - MAMA,
THEY DON'T LIKE MECopy !req
353. TO TAKE PERSONAL CALLS HERE.Copy !req
354. - THIS WILL ONLY TAKE A MOMENT.Copy !req
355. YOUR SISTER'S FUTURE IN-LAWS
ARE VISITING THIS WEEKEND.Copy !req
356. - OH, THAT'S OKAY.
I CAN SLEEP ON THE SOFA.Copy !req
357. - I THINK IT WOULD BE BEST
IF YOU FOUND SOMEWHERE ELSECopy !req
358. TO STAY TONIGHT.Copy !req
359. THE VERMAS ARE A VERY PROMINENT
FAMILY, AND IF YOU WERE THERE—Copy !req
360. - YOU'RE SAYING
YOU DON'T WANT ME THERE?Copy !req
361. - I'M GLAD
YOU UNDERSTAND, BETA.Copy !req
362. - "AND THEN THE SUSPECT FLED
THE SCENE OF THE CRIME,Copy !req
363. DISPOSING OF THE MURDER WEAPON
IN A COMMUNITY COMPOST HEAP."Copy !req
364. - WHAT'S GOING ON HERE?Copy !req
365. - OH, I'M TEACHING
SANTOSH ENGLISH.Copy !req
366. "POLICE ARE STILL LOOKING
FOR THE..."Copy !req
367. - "SE-VER-ED LIM-BAS."Copy !req
368. - "SEVERED LIMBS."Copy !req
369. THAT'S GOOD FOR TODAY.Copy !req
370. - I THINK SANTOSH COUSIN.Copy !req
371. - AH, AH, AH, YOU MEAN,
"I THINK THAT'S MY COUSIN."Copy !req
372. WE HAVE SO MUCH WORK TO DO.Copy !req
373. WE'LL START AGAIN
AFTER YOU MAKE MY LUNCH.Copy !req
374. WHAT ARE YOU DOING BACK
SO EARLY?Copy !req
375. - WELL, UH, I WAS THINKING,Copy !req
376. AND, UH, MAYBE
I WAS A LITTLE HARD ON YOUCopy !req
377. EARLIER, YOU KNOW.Copy !req
378. I'M SURE YOU HAD A REASON
TO GO OFF ON THAT CUSTOMER.Copy !req
379. MAYBE THERE'S
SOME PERSONAL STUFF GOING ON?Copy !req
380. - NO. NOPE.
NO. NOTHING.Copy !req
381. - NO FAMILY STUFF?Copy !req
382. - NO. NO.
NO. NO.Copy !req
383. - NO MOM STUFF?Copy !req
384. - SO THE CALLS REALLY
ARE RECORDED FOR QUALITY CONTROLCopy !req
385. AND TRAINING PURPOSES.Copy !req
386. - THERE NEVER WAS AN APARTMENT.Copy !req
387. YOU STILL LIVE AT HOME, HUH?Copy !req
388. YEAH.Copy !req
389. THAT WAS PRETTY ROUGH,
WHAT YOUR MOM SAID.Copy !req
390. - YES.
BUT I KNOW YOU UNDERSTAND,Copy !req
391. BECAUSE WE ARE IN THE SAME BOAT.Copy !req
392. YOU ARE THE JOKE
OF YOUR FAMILY TOO.Copy !req
393. - WELL, NO, I'M
THE DISAPPOINTMENT OF MY FAMILY.Copy !req
394. - YEAH, SAME THING.
- IT'S A LITTLE DIFFERENT.Copy !req
395. - NOT REALLY, TODD.Copy !req
396. - WHAT—MY POINT ISCopy !req
397. THAT YOU CAN'T LET YOUR MOM
TREAT YOU LIKE THAT, YOU KNOW.Copy !req
398. RESPECT IS A TWO-WAY STREET.Copy !req
399. - NO, NO, NO, NOT HERE.Copy !req
400. RESPECT IS A ONE-WAY STREET.Copy !req
401. THE SIGNAGE IS QUITE CLEAR.Copy !req
402. RESPECT YOUR PARENTS.Copy !req
403. - SO WHAT ARE YOU GONNA DO?Copy !req
404. - THE VERMAS
WILL BE GONE TONIGHT.Copy !req
405. I CAN GO HOME.Copy !req
406. - YOU'RE GONNA GO BACK?Copy !req
407. - THAT'S WHAT WE DO, TODD.Copy !req
408. IN INDIA, WE LIVE AT HOME
UNTIL WE GET MARRIED.Copy !req
409. - OH, MAN,
THAT'S ROUGH.Copy !req
410. I COULDN'T WAIT
TO LEAVE HOME.Copy !req
411. DAD WAS ALWAYS ON MY CASE.
I HAD TO GET OUT.Copy !req
412. WELL, I MEAN, I SLEPT
IN THE GUESTHOUSECopy !req
413. UNTIL I LEFT COLLEGE,
AND THEN I GOT OUT.Copy !req
414. - I WAS FEELING LIKE WE WERE
IN THE SAME BOATCopy !req
415. UNTIL YOU MENTIONED
YOU WENT TO COLLEGECopy !req
416. AND THAT YOUR FAMILY
HAS AN EXTRA HOUSE.Copy !req
417. - IT'S NOT LIKE A WHOLE HOUSE.Copy !req
418. IT'S LIKE A ROOM WITH A BATHROOM
AND A KITCHEN.Copy !req
419. - TWO ROOMS?Copy !req
420. I DID IT.
I DID IT, TODD.Copy !req
421. - WHAT?
- I GOT MY OWN PLACE TO LIVE.Copy !req
422. - HEY! THAT'S GREAT.
GOOD FOR YOU, BUDDY.Copy !req
423. - IT'S GREAT BECAUSE WE
CAN SHARE A RICKSHAW TO WORK.Copy !req
424. - WHY?Copy !req
425. I BET YOU'LL BE ABLE
TO HEAR THIS!Copy !req
426. YOU'RE RIGHT UNDERNEATH ME!Copy !req
427. CAN YOU BELIEVE IT?Copy !req
428. - I CAN'T.
I ALMOST DON'T WANT TO.Copy !req
429. - OH, ISN'T IT GREAT, TODD?Copy !req
430. I LISTENED TO YOU,
AND I WENT OUT ON MY OWN.Copy !req
431. - YEAH, YOU WENT OUT
ON YOUR OWN—Copy !req
432. REALLY, REALLY CLOSE
TO WHERE I WENT OUT ON MY OWN.Copy !req
433. - MM. OH, THERE'S A COMMUNAL
BATHROOM DOWN THE HALL.Copy !req
434. BUT PERHAPS IN THE MORNING
WHEN THERE'S A LINE,Copy !req
435. I COULD USE YOURS?Copy !req
436. AH, I SHOULD PROBABLY GO
AFTER YOU,Copy !req
437. BECAUSE SANTOSH'S COFFEE
REALLY DOES A NUMBER ON ME.Copy !req
438. LET ME GIVE YOU A TOUR.Copy !req
439. SINK...Copy !req
440. BED...Copy !req
441. AND HERE WE ARE.Copy !req
442. IT'S A STARTER.
- MM-HMM.Copy !req
443. - DANCING!
I WANT TO SEE EVERYBODY DANCING!Copy !req
444. WHAT? WHAT?
YOU'RE NEXT. YOU'RE NEXT.Copy !req
445. - GUPTA, YOU'RE OUT OF CUPS.Copy !req
446. - NO PROBLEM.
HERE...Copy !req
447. EXCUSE ME.
EXCUSE ME.Copy !req
448. TODD.Copy !req
449. TODD, I NEED CUPS!Copy !req
450. TODD!
TODD, I NEED CUPS!Copy !req
451. - MAYBE YOU SHOULD GET HIM
SOME CUPS.Copy !req
452. - NO, NO.
NO, JUST IGNORE HIM.Copy !req
453. HE'LL GO AWAY.Copy !req
454. - I NEED CUPS, TODD!Copy !req
455. PLASTIC CUPS!Copy !req
456. - WHOA!Copy !req
457. WHAT THE HELL?Copy !req
458. - HEY, ISN'T THIS GREAT?Copy !req
459. NOW WE HAVE A TALK HOLE.Copy !req
460. HEY, TODD, I DON'T KNOW
IF YOU HEARD ME,Copy !req
461. BUT I NEED CUPS.Copy !req
462. AND BRING HER.Copy !req
463. IT'S A SAUSAGE FEST UP HERE.Copy !req