1. The 267th Neo Yokio Grand Prix
promises to be the best yet.Copy !req
2. The eyes of the world are
on this glamorous city-stateCopy !req
3. as the best of the best gatherCopy !req
4. for one of sport's most elegant
and dangerous competitions.Copy !req
5. The race is 20 miles
through the streets of Neo Yokio.Copy !req
6. The course is challenging,Copy !req
7. running through the narrow pathways
of Long Island Walled City,Copy !req
8. the halls of The Guggenheim
and even dipping underwaterCopy !req
9. for the infamous
Sea Beneath 14th St. Tunnel.Copy !req
10. The current world champ,
Mark Radicchio of Giappone,Copy !req
11. is the favorite. He'll have his work
cut out for him against drivers like:Copy !req
12. Dave 1 of French CanadaCopy !req
13. and Mila Malevich of the Soviet Union.Copy !req
14. We wish the drivers the best of luck,Copy !req
15. and we pray to the God of Death
to spare as many of them as possible.Copy !req
16. I'm here to see Kaz Kaan.Copy !req
17. I refuse to believe it.Copy !req
18. I blew up the Bachelor Board. Accept it.Copy !req
19. No, it doesn't make any sense.Copy !req
20. You're not a terrorist.Copy !req
21. The Bachelor Board was a symbol of misery.Copy !req
22. Don't you feel better now that it's gone?Copy !req
23. I guess I do, but it's our culture.Copy !req
24. A culture built on hatred, greed
and the subjugation of the working class.Copy !req
25. You know she's right, Kazzy.Copy !req
26. I liked things a lot better
when you stayed inside Charles.Copy !req
27. No, too stuffy in there.Copy !req
28. Kaz, listen to me.Copy !req
29. I need to get out of the city
as soon as possible.Copy !req
30. Will you help?Copy !req
31. I really don't know if I should help
an enemy of the state.Copy !req
32. Kaz, someone's at the door.Copy !req
33. Can't you get it, Sadie?Copy !req
34. No, I'm making brekky, you schmuck.Copy !req
35. Oh, I can't stand her.Copy !req
36. - Coming.Copy !req
37. Damn it.
Sadie, it's the Remembrancer.Copy !req
38. Hide Helena.Copy !req
39. Mr. Khan, I know you're in there.Copy !req
40. Oh, hello, Mr. Remembrancer.Copy !req
41. Sorry to drop in on you so early.Copy !req
42. Is now a bad time?Copy !req
43. Actually, it is.Copy !req
44. - Is that an original Arco lamp?
- No, that's a—Copy !req
45. It's a reproduction.Copy !req
46. Well, either way,
it's quite a feat of design.Copy !req
47. So, how can I help you?Copy !req
48. Why don't you sit down, Mr. Kaan?Copy !req
49. - That's quite all right.
- I insist.Copy !req
50. - You should feel comfortable.Copy !req
51. You know, today is such a special day
for Neo Yokio,Copy !req
52. and it makes me sick to my stomach
knowing there's a terrorist out there.Copy !req
53. Don't you mean suspected terrorist?Copy !req
54. Oh, no. I know Helena did it.Copy !req
55. And she's gonna hang.Copy !req
56. Now, Mr. Kaan, would you mind
if I took a gander in your bedroom?Copy !req
57. Why would you wanna do that?Copy !req
58. Mr. Kaan, the bedroom is the heart
of the apartment.Copy !req
59. I'm a furniture buff.Copy !req
60. I need to see it.Copy !req
61. Oh, hello.Copy !req
62. Who is this lovely woman?Copy !req
63. She's not lovely.
She's actually quite crass.Copy !req
64. That's right.
See you later, handsome.Copy !req
65. Hello, gentlemen.Copy !req
66. Don't know what it is
about a well-decorated apartment,Copy !req
67. but it makes me wanna smoke.Copy !req
68. Do you mind?Copy !req
69. Uh... Yeah, sure.Copy !req
70. Actually, the young master's neighbors
are quite sensitive to smoke.Copy !req
71. Best not to.Copy !req
72. Good thing I brought my vape.Copy !req
73. Hell of a view, Mr. Kaan.Copy !req
74. Is there a city more beautiful
than Neo Yokio?Copy !req
75. Well, that's enough vaping for me.
I'll be seeing you around.Copy !req
76. Nice talking to you, Mr. Kaan.
Do let me know if you hear from Helena.Copy !req
77. Everything all right?Copy !req
78. Uh... slight malfunction, I'm afraid.Copy !req
79. I— I keep forgetting to update
his operating system.Copy !req
80. Better get on that, Mr. Kaan.Copy !req
81. Okay. We should stay in the apartment
until things calm down.Copy !req
82. We'll be safe here.Copy !req
83. Hello.Copy !req
84. - Who else has a key to your apartment?
- Nobody.Copy !req
85. Ugh. Just wait right here.Copy !req
86. Who are you?
And how did you get into my apartment?Copy !req
87. - We are the subletters.
- Subletters?Copy !req
88. Yeah, from Frankfurt.Copy !req
89. We sublet the apartment
for watch the Grand Prix.Copy !req
90. But I didn't sublet my apartment.Copy !req
91. Yeah, we paid €30,000.Copy !req
92. See?Copy !req
93. Aunt Agatha.Copy !req
94. - Speak.
- You sublet my apartment?Copy !req
95. I sublet the apartment
in which you currently reside. Yes.Copy !req
96. But why?Copy !req
97. It's Grand Prix weekend.Copy !req
98. These Germans will pay through the nose
for a view of the track.Copy !req
99. Ugh. Where am I supposed to stay?Copy !req
100. - You're smart. You'll figure it out.Copy !req
101. Put down my field hockey sticks!Copy !req
102. Bad news, we can't stay here.
Charles, can you fly us to Connecticut?Copy !req
103. Air traffic is restricted
until after the race.Copy !req
104. There has to be some way out
of the city.Copy !req
105. Our options are quite limited, ma'am.
On Grand Prix day,Copy !req
106. there's only one train out,
and it leaves at 1:15.Copy !req
107. Great, we can still make it.Copy !req
108. But I can't go outside.
The cops are looking for me.Copy !req
109. But they're not looking...
for Mila Malevich.Copy !req
110. Okay. The coast is clear.Copy !req
111. If we catch a cab, we can make it
to Grand Central in 15 minutes.Copy !req
112. - Miss Malevich, there you are.
- I'm sorry. Who are you?Copy !req
113. This is the Soviet ambassador.Copy !req
114. He wants to personally escort her
to the press conference.Copy !req
115. Press conference?Copy !req
116. For the Grand Prix.
It's about to start. Let's go. Chop-chop.Copy !req
117. Just keep a low profileCopy !req
118. and we'll get out of here
as soon as possible.Copy !req
119. Mila, it's good to see you.Copy !req
120. God, I was shit-faced last night,Copy !req
121. but I woke up at seven a.m.
and ran five miles.Copy !req
122. Crazy, right?Copy !req
123. The day is finally here,
the 267th Neo Yokio Grand Prix.Copy !req
124. This race is a symbol of our passion,
our heritage and our resilience.Copy !req
125. Journalists, start your questions.Copy !req
126. The Neo Yokio Grand Prix
is already knownCopy !req
127. as one of the world's
most dangerous sporting events.Copy !req
128. Given the recent violence in the city,Copy !req
129. do you think the Lord Mayor's decision
to let the race go on is misguided?Copy !req
130. We put our lives on the line
every time we race, okay?Copy !req
131. To cancel the Grand Prix
would be pure pussy shit.Copy !req
132. What about you, Mr. Radicchio?Copy !req
133. Are you happy to defend your title
in such an unusual situation?Copy !req
134. I'm a driver.Copy !req
135. I drive.Copy !req
136. I assume the authorities will deal
with the terrorists.Copy !req
137. Miss Malevich, your thoughts?Copy !req
138. Miss Malevich?Copy !req
139. Mr. French Canada,
are there any scores you wish to settle?Copy !req
140. I don't like Mrs. Malevich.
It's no secret.Copy !req
141. She stole too many titles from me.Copy !req
142. That's a serious accusation.
Your response, Miss Malevich?Copy !req
143. See that? She even admits it.Copy !req
144. This is crazy.Copy !req
145. Ah! Miss Malevich has no words
for you puppets of the West.Copy !req
146. Communism forever!Copy !req
147. I just wanna say, screw all these chumps.Copy !req
148. I don't know if I'll win today,Copy !req
149. but I'll certainly be
the most beautiful driver out there.Copy !req
150. Boarding has begun
for the 1:15 to Greenwich,Copy !req
151. final train of the day.Copy !req
152. Did you get the tickets, sir?Copy !req
153. - Yup, last three.
Mr. Kaan.Copy !req
154. Fancy seeing you here.Copy !req
155. Mr. Remembrancer.Copy !req
156. You're not following me,
are you?Copy !req
157. Following you? Of course, not.
I'm just having lunch at the Oyster Bar.Copy !req
158. Now, what are you doing here?Copy !req
159. Oh, yeah. We're having lunch here, too.Copy !req
160. If you're just here to eat,
why do you have those train tickets?Copy !req
161. Good question. Charles?Copy !req
162. The young master bought them for our trip
to the Greenwich polo store next week.Copy !req
163. He likes to plan ahead.Copy !req
164. Is there anything special
about that particular polo store?Copy !req
165. No, not really.Copy !req
166. Interesting.Copy !req
167. Well, since we're all here,
shall we dine together?Copy !req
168. We have a fantastic selection
of oysters today.Copy !req
169. Final boarding call
for the 1:15 to Greenwich.Copy !req
170. For the Kumamotos,
we recommend just a bit of lemon.Copy !req
171. Oh, that's great, thank you very much.Copy !req
172. Ahem. For the Wellfleets,
perhaps some mignonette.Copy !req
173. - Mm-hm. Yeah, perfect.
- Ahem.Copy !req
174. And, of course,
for the Long Island Blue Points,Copy !req
175. our house-made horseradish.Copy !req
176. Okay. That's amazing. Sounds delicious.
Bye-bye.Copy !req
177. - Can I get you anything else?
- Just the check, please.Copy !req
178. Certainly.Copy !req
179. You know, Mr. Kaan, when I was down
at the Saint Tesoro townhouse,Copy !req
180. I found something very interesting.Copy !req
181. Is that so?Copy !req
182. Yep.Copy !req
183. Helena's diary.Copy !req
184. You know,
she wrote about you quite frequently.Copy !req
185. She says that although
you are a brainwashed tool of the regime,Copy !req
186. she felt a deep rapport with you,Copy !req
187. something akin to—Copy !req
188. - Are you all right, Miss Malevich?
- Uh, she's fine. Just pre-race jitters.Copy !req
189. The 1:15 to Greenwich is now departing.Copy !req
190. - Damn it.Copy !req
191. Aunt Agatha, I can't talk right now.Copy !req
192. What happened at the press conference?Copy !req
193. Mila, I'll be right back.Copy !req
194. Aunt Agatha, I promise you.Copy !req
195. Everything's okay.
But I really don't have time to talk.Copy !req
196. Come, come, Miss Malevich,Copy !req
197. I insist that you try at least one oyster
at our city's most famous oyster bar.Copy !req
198. Seriously, I need to go.Copy !req
199. Don't you dare hang up on me.Copy !req
200. Come on.Copy !req
201. I want to see you enjoy it.Copy !req
202. You have one chance
to tell the truthCopy !req
203. or so help me God,
I will write you out of my will.Copy !req
204. Ugh. Okay. The truth is Mila's...Copy !req
205. so much fun. I gotta go, bye.Copy !req
206. She's gotta go.
That was the Soviets on the phone.Copy !req
207. Lovely dining with you.Copy !req
208. I call this right here
the Crazy Caprese Pyramid.Copy !req
209. Hey, what's up, Kaz?Copy !req
210. Damn! You know you don't fit in here.
It's too small.Copy !req
211. Yo, you gotta wait outside,
man. Come on.Copy !req
212. I'm sorry,Copy !req
213. but it's imperative
that we have ultimate privacy.Copy !req
214. Yo, what's will all the secrecy, dude?Copy !req
215. I'm sorry, guys.Copy !req
216. I really didn't wanna rope you into this,
but we have nowhere else to turn.Copy !req
217. What are you talking about, dawg?Copy !req
218. What?Copy !req
219. Helena Saint Terrorist is in our bar?Copy !req
220. - This is dope.
- You're not mad I brought her here?Copy !req
221. Hell, no, dawg.
This is a crazy VIP-terrorist scenario.Copy !req
222. Gentlemen, I hate to interrupt,
but time is of the essence.Copy !req
223. We have to formulate a new plan
to get Helena out of the city.Copy !req
224. All right. Where are you trying to go?Copy !req
225. At this point,
New Jersey is our best option.Copy !req
226. Uh... So, why don't y'all take
the Lincoln Tunnel?Copy !req
227. Unfortunately, the Lincoln Tunnel is
on the Grand Prix track.Copy !req
228. Only a race car driver could get near it.Copy !req
229. Race car driver?Copy !req
230. Bong! Problem solved.Copy !req
231. I grew up in the city.
I have no idea how to drive.Copy !req
232. But Kaz does.Copy !req
233. What does that have to do with anything?Copy !req
234. Dawg,
you two have the same feminine frame.Copy !req
235. If you dress up in that outfit,
you can pretend to be the Russian,Copy !req
236. Helena can hide in the nose cone
of the car.Copy !req
237. That's brilliant.Copy !req
238. No, it's not. Don't they inspect the car
before the race?Copy !req
239. They'll find you in there.Copy !req
240. You are allowed one pit stop, sir.Copy !req
241. We can hide her then.Copy !req
242. I'm gonna die, right?Copy !req
243. Nah, dawg, not necessarily.Copy !req
244. You can do this, Kaz.Copy !req
245. We'll make it out... together.Copy !req
246. Lexy... one last Caprese Martini, please.Copy !req
247. I brought you a big Toblerone
for the road.Copy !req
248. Thanks. That's really thoughtful.Copy !req
249. I know you still don't understand
why I did it.Copy !req
250. But there's a darkness in Neo Yokio,
and it's not the demons.Copy !req
251. Drivers, report to your cars for check-in.Copy !req
252. We'll talk about it more
in New Jersey, right?Copy !req
253. Yeah, Kaz.Copy !req
254. We'll talk in New Jersey.Copy !req
255. Charles, are you there?Copy !req
256. Yes.
I'm on top of the Pan Am Building.Copy !req
257. I can see the whole track.Copy !req
258. Pray for me.Copy !req
259. Of course, sir.Copy !req
260. Ladies and gentlemen, start your engines.Copy !req
261. Don't drive too slowly, sir.
It'll make you more vulnerable.Copy !req
262. Brace yourself, sir.
You're heading into the Walled City.Copy !req
263. The Walled City?
But don't people live there?Copy !req
264. Sir, Neo Yokio doesn't concern itself
with the safety of its slum denizens.Copy !req
265. I'm starting to think Neo Yokio's
not the greatest city in the world.Copy !req
266. Bougie pig, don't you know
we're dying down here?Copy !req
267. I'm so sorry, everybody.Copy !req
268. - Yo, B, you're killing it out there.
- Thanks, Lexy.Copy !req
269. - How's the car look?
- I don't know. I'm not a mechanic.Copy !req
270. Hey, Gottlieb,
hurry up with that precious cargo.Copy !req
271. Yo, I'm trying.
She's heavier than she looks.Copy !req
272. So, Helena's in there?Copy !req
273. - That's right.
And who makes that bag?Copy !req
274. Louis Vuitton.Copy !req
275. Very nice.Copy !req
276. Sir, you're approaching The Guggenheim.Copy !req
277. What do I need to know?Copy !req
278. There's a ramp on the roof.Copy !req
279. You need to hit it at 125 miles per hour.Copy !req
280. Or else?Copy !req
281. Or else you won't make the landing, sir.Copy !req
282. Miss Malevich, prepare to die.Copy !req
283. Helena's extra weight
is slowing the car down.Copy !req
284. Sir, you need to go faster.Copy !req
285. Hell, yeah, I did it.Copy !req
286. Don't celebrate just yet, sir.Copy !req
287. You're about to enter
the Sea Beneath 14th Street.Copy !req
288. It's dark and tortuous.Copy !req
289. You'll have to keep your wits about you.Copy !req
290. I can't see.Copy !req
291. Kaz? What are you doing here?Copy !req
292. Long story,
but I can't have anyone hit my car.Copy !req
293. Will you help me?Copy !req
294. I'd do it for a homey.Copy !req
295. - Are we homeys?
- Yes.Copy !req
296. Say it. Say I'm your homey.Copy !req
297. Fine. You're my homey.Copy !req
298. That's what I thought.
See you on the other side, homey.Copy !req
299. What? What are you doing racing?
You herb!Copy !req
300. He's not a herb.Copy !req
301. He's my homey.Copy !req
302. Oh, no, no!Copy !req
303. Mamma mia!Copy !req
304. I love being in public when my hair's wet.Copy !req
305. I feel like a Gucci model.Copy !req
306. Charles, you know I could beat this prick.Copy !req
307. I know, sir.Copy !req
308. What?Copy !req
309. Bingo!Copy !req
310. We made it, Helena!Copy !req
311. Noble effort, Mr. Kaan,
but your race is over.Copy !req
312. Louis Vuitton.Copy !req
313. Very nice.Copy !req
314. I'm sorry, Helena. We were so close.Copy !req
315. Remembrancer, this is Agatha Kaan.Copy !req
316. Step away from my nephew.Copy !req
317. Your nephew has aided and abetted
an enemy of the state.Copy !req
318. Your magistocratic rights are meaningless.Copy !req
319. It's okay. I accept my fate.Copy !req
320. Hello there, handsome!Copy !req
321. What? Impossible.Copy !req
322. - Sadie?
- No, no, no, no, no!Copy !req
323. No, no. This is cuckoo bananas.Copy !req
324. Where is she?Copy !req
325. Where is she, damn it?Copy !req
326. Damn it, where is she?Copy !req
327. Where did you hide her? Where is she?Copy !req
328. Where is she?Copy !req
329. Where is she?Copy !req
330. It's been three weeks,Copy !req
331. and I still can't believe
she's really gone.Copy !req
332. Helena Saint Tesoro has vanished
without a trace.Copy !req
333. Life in the metropolis continues
as though nothing has happened.Copy !req
334. I have a new mecha, Charles the Second.Copy !req
335. The West Side Gentlemen
have begun practicingCopy !req
336. for the upcoming field hockey season.Copy !req
337. The new Bachelor Board is up,Copy !req
338. and Arcangelo is once again my nemesis.Copy !req
339. Everything has fallen back into place.Copy !req
340. And yet, I can't help but feel
that Neo Yokio is about to explode.Copy !req