1. Battle royale.
Did I call it, or did I call it?
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2. You called it.
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3. Hey, everybody. I can't stop playing
MQ's battle royale mode.
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4. There's so much blood.
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5. I've won! Battle royale.
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6. Battle royale is so much fun.
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7. I'm gonna buy a hot dog skin.
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8. Wow. Those kids are young.
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9. Oh, yeah. Our average daily user
just got down to nine years old.
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10. So now that we've got the kids,
what are we gonna do with them?
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11. We are gonna bleed 'em dry, of course.
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12. Hey, Brad. I need to talk to you
about a rather serious matter.
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13. It's
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14. your birthday!
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15. Let's hear it for the birthday boy.
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16. Happy birthday—
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17. It's not my birthday.
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18. Brad. I know you like to put up walls,
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19. but I have it on pretty good authority
that today is your birthday.
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20. Okay, well,
I don't know who your source is,
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21. but they're a liar.
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22. No, actually, they're not a liar.
Because they're your brother!
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23. Come on out, Zack.
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24. Happy birthday, bro.
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25. Look at his face.
Oh, my God, that's priceless.
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26. Yeah, Zack e-mailed me a few weeks ago.
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27. Said you guys hardly see each other,
and he wanted to surprise you.
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28. Naturally, I was on board.
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29. And as an only child
who always wanted a brother,
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30. I cannot imagine
how excited you are right now.
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31. Come here, big guy. Come.
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32. So good to see you.
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33. That is beautiful.
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34. What's his angle? What is he planning?
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35. - Sorry, I'm lost.
- Me too. Is this a new hallway?
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36. Is everything okay? You seem frazzled.
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37. I'm not frazzled. I'm plotting.
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38. Of course. Plotting against who?
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39. My brother, Zack.
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40. He's a private equity douche
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41. who swoops in, fattens up companies
and then guts 'em.
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42. - He's a stone-cold killer.
- A killer? That guy?
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43. Yes, that guy.
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44. I bet he's here to kill my pig.
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45. So typical.
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46. I won't let him. This is my pig.
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47. If anyone's gonna kill it,
it's gonna be me.
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48. - Sorry, what pig?
- The company.
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49. Battle royale must have juiced
our numbers enough to get him interested.
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50. - He smells blood in the water.
- The pig's blood?
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51. - My blood!
- You're bleeding?
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52. - It's a metaphor, Jo. Keep up.
- I'm trying.
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53. The birthday party is just a cover.
He's here to take my job.
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54. Guess what. I know what to do.
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55. Sorry, are we walking?
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56. What are you doing?
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57. I'm hiding in my office until he leaves.
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58. It's a power play.
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59. - Is it?
- Yes, it is, Jo! Okay?
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60. - Do not question me. Just get rid of him.
- Yes, sir. Right away, sir.
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61. This doesn't make sense.
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62. Why would Montreal reward Poppy
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63. for putting a cancer into the game
that will eventually kill MQ?
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64. They gave her a Porsche.
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65. - They gave her a Porsche?
- Yeah.
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66. Damn.
Battle royale must be bringing in bank.
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67. That's not the point, tester.
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68. You don't gift
a high-performance vehicle like that
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69. to a first-time driver, all right?
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70. You give 'em a piece of shit like this.
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71. You're welcome for the ride, dude.
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72. Also, with climate change,
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73. everyone should be driving
an eco-friendly vehicle.
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74. I realize that.
That's why I have three Teslas.
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75. Why do you have three Teslas?
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76. Because I care about the environment.
Follow the conversation.
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77. Pull over here. There she is.
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78. Is she sitting on the hood?
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79. I guess it's nice you're picking her up.
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80. I'm not picking her up.
The little monster can kick rocks.
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81. I'm here for the car.
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82. Hey!
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83. - Are you out of your mind?
- What's happening?
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84. You can't sit on that hood
like it's the goddamn General Lee.
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85. - You can't say that anymore.
- Shut up.
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86. - How did you know I was here?
- Your tester told my tester.
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87. But that's not the point, Poppy.
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88. You can't leave machinery like this on
the side of the road. It's disrespectful.
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89. You might want to get the chocolate bars
off the dash. They're melting.
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90. You put chocolate in there?
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91. Okay, fine. You deal with it then.
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92. I can't drive this stupid thing anyway.
You want the keys?
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93. - Yeah.
- Fireball!
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94. I mean, we had one nice moment, Poppy.
One goddamn—
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95. - Here's my chauffeur.
- I am not your chauffeur.
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96. - Yeah, you definitely can't say that.
- Shut up!
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97. Yeah.
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98. I'm not 100% sure,
but I think that's pretty dicey.
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99. It's fine. I don't mean it like that.
I'm gonna sit in the front. It's not—
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100. - It doesn't matter where you sit.
- It doesn't matter.
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101. No, no. I mean,
I'm a woman of color, so I can't—
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102. I can't get canceled, can I?
Can I? Can I get canceled?
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103. I don't think I can get canceled. I think…
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104. I think I'm good. I'm good.
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105. I'm good.
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106. Okay, you know what? It's super dicey,
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107. so… I'm just gonna let
the women of color figure this out.
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108. - I'ma back away.
- Yeah, that's us, right?
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109. The women of color.
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110. You got my chicken nuggets in the car?
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111. Great.
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112. Okay.
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113. So that's why you had to get up so early?
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114. Yeah. Gotta work twice as hard
to get half as far.
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115. - Twice as hard as what?
- Never mind.
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116. - Where the fuck's my sweet and sour sauce?
- They're in the cup holder!
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117. - I gotta go.
- Okay. Yeah. Bye.
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118. Hey, tester. See you back at the office.
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119. Don't try and keep up.
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120. Okay, here we go.
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121. It's a GT4.
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122. Been a minute on the stick.
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123. No problem. I put the man in manual.
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124. And I can say that 'cause I'm alone.
All right.
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125. Oh… my… God.
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126. - Hi.
- I can drive stick.
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127. It's just that she's got chocolate
or something stuck in the clutch.
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128. Do you wanna…
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129. This model is not… suited for—
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130. Okay.
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131. I kinda feel like… maybe I—
There's— I have…
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132. - I don't know. Maybe…
- If—
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133. Maybe you don't know how to…
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134. My legs are probably too strong,
and I'm putting too much…
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135. Yeah, that's probably it.
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136. Do you wanna…
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137. Here you go.
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138. What's that about?
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139. Our creative directors
are going through a divorce of sorts.
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140. - It's kinda messy.
- That must be hard on you.
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141. It is.
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142. Thank you for recognizing that.
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143. Strong shoulders.
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144. There she is.
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145. I saved a piece of cake for you.
Where's the birthday boy?
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146. I was hoping he would show me around
before I take him to lunch.
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147. Mr. Bakshi doesn't eat lunch.
He says lunch is for losers.
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148. Uh-oh. He's not watching
his calories again, is he?
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149. He's always been insecure
about his weight.
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150. Really?
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151. He is not insecure about anything.
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152. He's just too busy to focus on lunch
or anything else besides work.
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153. He doesn't look busy.
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154. It's okay. Maybe this was a bad idea.
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155. No, you planned a special day
for your brother
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156. because you know your brother
like only a brother could,
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157. and this is the thanks he gives you?
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158. I'll say it. He doesn't deserve you.
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159. Well, it's not about the birthday.
This goes way back.
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160. He's probably still mad about Kate.
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161. Right. Feud over a woman.
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162. No, I read about this kind of thing.
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163. No way.
He wouldn't fall apart over some cooze.
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164. Would he?
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165. Trouble in paradise?
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166. Your new mentor
not everything you thought he'd be?
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167. He is.
He's actually the best I've ever had.
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168. That supposed to hurt me?
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169. 'Cause it just makes me laugh.
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170. You're not laughing.
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171. I'm laughing.
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172. What is happening?
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173. Whatever, Brad's not coming out,
so Zack should leave, now.
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174. No. Not before I give him a tour.
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175. You may have lost a brother in Brad,
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176. but you've gained one in me.
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177. Get a room.
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178. - Mission accomplished. He's gone.
- Nice.
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179. See? My power play worked.
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180. Of course it did. It always does.
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181. - He wanted to take you to lunch.
- Lunch is for losers.
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182. - Yeah, that's what I said.
- Hey.
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183. He's David's problem now.
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184. Wait, what?
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185. David's taking him
on a tour of the building.
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186. Where?
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187. I don't know. I thought it probably made—
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188. You thought you would let him
cozy up to our executive producer
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189. so he could personally campaign
for my job?
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190. I failed you.
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191. - Brad, I can fix this.
- You've done enough.
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192. No.
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193. I can fix it!
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194. Not gonna kill my pig.
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195. Not gonna take my job.
Not gonna kill my pig.
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196. Not gonna take my job.
Not gonna kill my pig.
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197. Not gonna take my job.
Not gonna kill my pig.
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198. Hey, what's up?
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199. Well, guys, we did it.
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200. We put a lot of late nights and
a lot of long hours into battle royale.
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201. But this…
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202. This is what makes it all worth it.
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203. Dana.
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204. He tries here,
and he nearly gets it, and it's like…
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205. He can't.
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206. So good.
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207. Thank you for recording this, Dana.
Great idea.
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208. No, this was your idea.
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209. My idea was to get back to work.
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210. For the past two weeks,
I have been your driver,
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211. your food delivery service
and your cheerleader.
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212. When are you gonna teach me to code?
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213. How do you know that
I'm not teaching you to code right now?
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214. You just don't understand my methods
'cause I'm like Mr. Miyagi.
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215. - Who?
- Mr. Miyagi. Karate Kid.
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216. Wait, you don't know Karate Kid?
Unacceptable!
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217. Who's got candy?
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218. - Poppy. Pop-star. Pop goes the weasel.
- What do you want, Brad?
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219. - Hey, you like me, right?
- No.
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220. - But I got you battle royale.
- Yeah,
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221. through intimidation
and devious manipulation.
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222. Okay, but you like me
more than a stranger, right?
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223. I'm the devil you know.
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224. Another devil might be
a thousand times worse.
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225. - Trust me, this guy is.
- What are you on about?
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226. It's my brother, Zack.
He's gonna be here any second.
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227. - I need to know you're on team Brad.
- I'm not. Again, I do not like you.
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228. Fine. Okay, I'll give you a cut of
whatever I make on the skin dump.
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229. What the fuck?
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230. Avatar skins, keep up.
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231. They will turn battle royale
into a cash cow.
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232. Montreal will be super happy.
Ian will be super pissed.
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233. - I'm in. What do you need me to do?
- Great. Zack's gonna be here any minute.
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234. He's gonna try and charm you.
Don't give him an inch.
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235. - Be mean to him. You can be mean, right?
- Obviously.
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236. Okay, why don't you go get me my lunch?
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237. And while you're at it,
you can wax off that stank face.
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238. That's gonna make sense
once you see the movie, Karate Kid.
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239. Great, keep that bitchy energy.
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240. Stop it.
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241. Last but not least
is the programmers' den.
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242. Hey! There's the birthday boy.
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243. - Where have you been, Motu?
- Motu?
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244. It's a nickname.
Not mine. Shut up. Whatever.
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245. Why are you still here?
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246. David took me to meet
the art team. Lovely bunch of guys.
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247. Yeah, none of them could believe
that Zack was your brother.
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248. 'Cause he's not a total sourpuss
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249. like someone we know.
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250. And David had them whip up
this amazing drawing of me.
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251. - What?
- Yeah. Look at that. Isn't that great?
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252. Yeah, had 'em whip up one of me too.
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253. - Look at that. Brothers in arms.
- Brothers in arms!
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254. - We came up with a thing. Pretty cool.
- Stop it.
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255. Anyway… So,
this is our top-notch programming team.
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256. And this here is—
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257. Zack, right?
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258. I gotta tell you,
you look like a bloody drongo, mate.
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259. - I'm so sorry?
- A drongo. It's an insult.
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260. In Australia. It doesn't really play here.
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261. Poppy is our socially inept
co-creative director.
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262. Wait, wait, wait. Poppy Li?
The genius behind battle—
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263. I'm sorry. I'm honored to meet you.
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264. A genius? I wouldn't—
It's kind of a genius idea.
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265. I mean,
it brought in 14.2 million players.
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266. It was my idea.
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267. I tricked her into it because she's
too stupid to know what's good for her.
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268. - You are the devil!
- Okay, here's an idea.
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269. Why don't we take a break?
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270. Why don't we go out into the courtyard
where I have a special surprise for Brad?
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271. - You have a surprise? I love surprises.
- Right?
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272. Here's a special idea. How about
we take your special little surprise
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273. and we roll it into a special little ball
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274. and then we cram it
into your special little butt?
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275. Why don't we do that?
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276. Yeah.
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277. Yep.
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278. Yep!
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279. Brothers.
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280. Maybe I'm overthinking it, but do
you think Dana seemed annoyed at me?
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281. I don't know. I talked to her yesterday,
and she said she's fine.
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282. She said she was just tired, but…
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283. I just feel like
she's pulling away lately.
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284. I mean, not pulling away,
more like pulling toward something else.
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285. She has big dreams, which I love.
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286. I really support that.
I just wish that she would—
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287. Am I in hell?
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288. I think I may actually be in hell.
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289. I do not care about your love life,
tester.
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290. Okay, dude, for the last time,
I have a name.
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291. And you wanna burden me with it?
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292. By the way, do you think that
the other one is in the car with Poppy
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293. talking about you? No.
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294. She's talking about work
and how she can get ahead,
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295. which is what you should be doing.
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296. Yeah, you're right. You're right.
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297. So are you sure
you didn't notice a weird vibe?
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298. - I don't fucking care!
- Okay, dude. What is your problem?
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299. It's not my fault
that Poppy's doing better than you, okay?
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300. Maybe you should try
working a little harder,
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301. instead of sitting around
and longing for the days
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302. - when straight white men ruled the world.
- Sure, sure.
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303. Yeah, yeah. Blame your lack of ambition
on the patriarchy.
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304. Do you honestly think that I've
had more opportunities in this business
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305. - simply because I'm a straight white man?
- Yes!
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306. Yes! Of course I have. It's undeniable.
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307. Wait, really?
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308. - I kind of thought you'd—
- Shut, shut, shut up.
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309. Shut up. Shut up. I'm talking.
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310. Look. When I started, I was a tester.
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311. I found myself one day in an elevator with
my boss for three floors. I was alone.
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312. I pitched him, I don't know, 17 ideas.
I think he maybe liked one of them.
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313. But he knew my name. Then eventually,
six months later, I got promoted.
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314. Well, as a woman, I don't have access
to the same kinds of opportunities.
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315. Yeah, no, totally.
Women don't have the same opportunities.
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316. This is one. This is it.
This is the opportunity.
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317. This is the one
that a woman is in, that you are.
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318. You are the woman. This is
the opportunity. This is the elevator.
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319. Except it's a car,
and I'm trapped in it with you, alone,
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320. and you're in the driver's seat,
the woman.
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321. You can pitch some ideas. Go ahead. Go.
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322. - I'm in an elevator?
- What do you want, Rachel?
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323. What do you want?
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324. Helping women is exhausting.
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325. Stupid. So stupid. Such a pussy.
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326. You're fat too. You gotta lose weight.
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327. No more mochaccinos, you fat fatty.
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328. There you are.
I've been looking everywhere for you.
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329. - What is it?
- Something… bad.
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330. I don't know his work,
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331. - but I'm just…
- Me neither, but it's cool.
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332. - Hey, what's happening in here?
- That is what's happenin'.
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333. Zack!
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334. Hey, brother!
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335. - Hey, Snoop Doggy Dogg.
- What's poppin', Bert?
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336. It's Brad, but that's fine.
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337. What's the dealio?
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338. This was my special surprise.
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339. I asked him to perform a private concert
for you in the courtyard,
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340. 'cause I know you're such a big fan.
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341. Plus, he sort of owed me.
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342. Can you believe this motherfucker
bought me a farm in Humboldt County?
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343. - I bought him a farm!
- You bought him a farm.
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344. And since you weren't interested,
we just pivoted.
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345. Great!
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346. Yeah, Zack had a great idea to do
an in-game concert
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347. - and sell Snoop-skins to the players.
- All right.
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348. You ready, Snoop?
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349. I stay ready.
That's why I ain't gotta get ready.
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350. He's gonna sing. He's gonna sing.
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351. He's gonna sing.
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352. Check me out one time, y'all.
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353. Let me tell you somethin'
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354. It's everybody's favorite Crip cousin
Snoop Dogg
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355. Inductin' these woop hoes
Since RuPauls
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356. I'm good on both sides
Like switch hitters
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357. - I didn't know you were a Snoop fan.
- I'm not. It's also not my birthday.
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358. - Get me a fucking mochaccino.
- Yep. You bet.
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359. Get out of my way!
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360. If it ain't what I'm talkin'
Then why we talkin', homey?
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361. If it ain't what I'm talkin'
Then why we talkin', homey?
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362. This is the longest you've ever shut up.
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363. I'm thinking, okay? You asked me
an important question, so I'm thinking.
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364. - And I have to watch the road.
- There is no more road!
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365. - All right, that's it. I'm getting out.
- Wait. Wait! Just wait for a second!
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366. I want a seat at the table.
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367. Okay. Great.
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368. - Which table?
- What?
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369. What do you wanna do?
You wanna be a creative director?
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370. A lead programmer? A writer?
Art director? What do you want?
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371. - Yes.
- Yes, what?
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372. Yes, I wanna do the stuff you just said.
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373. - It's not a yes or no question.
- I know, okay?
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374. You're putting me on the spot.
This is hard for me.
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375. I'm giving you exactly what you're
always asking for, which is to be heard.
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376. But you don't have anything to say
because you don't know what you want.
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377. I do know what I want!
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378. I don't know what I want.
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379. Well, maybe you should try working
a little harder to figure your shit out,
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380. instead of spending all your time
sitting around longing for the days
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381. when you could blame all of your problems
on straight white guys.
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382. - Wait. How am I gonna get my car?
- I don't care!
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383. No!
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384. Hey!
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385. That was awesome, man.
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386. God. Room still has such an energy to it.
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387. Also a weed smell to this room.
We probably need to air that out.
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388. David,
I need a moment alone with my brother.
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389. Hey, we're all brothers here, huh?
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390. - Get the fuck out.
- Yeah. Yeah, right.
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391. And hey, brother. Don't forget
to send me the Brené Brown links, right?
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392. No, I will. She'll change your life.
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393. See ya, love you. All right, bye.
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394. Hey, brother. Enjoy the concert?
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395. Why are you doing this?
You don't wanna work here.
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396. You're right about that.
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397. This place is a gold mine.
But it's peaked.
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398. It's time
to strip her down and sell it off
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399. before the inevitable nosedive.
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400. - No. It's not time.
- Of course it is.
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401. The saddest thing is that you know it
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402. but are too scared
to do anything about it.
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403. Because you're soft.
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404. So, I will step in
and do what needs to be done.
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405. Just like I did with Kate.
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406. Leave her out of this.
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407. You have all these folks convinced
that you're some badass cutthroat.
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408. But all I see is a scared little boy.
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409. A pussy. Just like Papa always said.
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410. Don't do this.
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411. Don't take it away from me.
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412. Beg me.
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413. Beg me not to take it from you.
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414. Beg me not to kill your game.
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415. Please. Bhai-ya.
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416. Please don't kill my game.
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417. We'll see.
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418. Happy birthday.
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419. - It's not my birthday.
- I know.
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420. You have two minutes. Ask me.
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421. Who's Kate?
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422. When we were boys in 4-H, we were
given a piglet to raise for slaughter.
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423. But Brad grew attached. He named it Kate.
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424. Treated it like a pet.
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425. And when it was time to kill
the fat sow, he couldn't do it.
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426. Do you know what you do with a pig
that dies a natural death?
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427. Nothing. The meat's useless.
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428. Exactly. What a waste.
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429. So I did it for him,
because that's what needed to be done.
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430. Brad's balls just never dropped.
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431. But I think yours have.
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432. I'll be in touch.
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433. Let me tell you somethin'
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434. It's everybody's favorite Crip cousin
Snoop Dogg
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435. Snoop! Mr. Dogg. Hi, I'm a huge fan.
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436. Thanks, little girl.
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437. I'm not a little girl.
I'm actually an adult woman.
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438. Yo, what's up, Snoop?
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439. Ian, what's good, man?
When you releasing that new expansion?
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440. When you release that new album.
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441. - Hey, I'll see you at GGL.
- Fo' sho'.
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442. I have a Porsche.
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443. If it ain't what I'm talkin'
Then why we talkin', homey?
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444. If it ain't what I'm talkin'
Then why we talkin', homey?
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445. If it ain't what I'm talkin'
Then why we talkin', homey?
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446. 'Cause I done changed so many lives
With my vibes
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447. I make sure my Crips
And my 'Rus all survive
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448. Long Beach throwin' up C's
In my stores
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449. Hollywood star
Twin Towers with the boys
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450. I'm switchin' bitches
Like I switch cars
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451. Li'l homeys on go
With the licks for us
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452. I'm walkin' in the church
Smellin' like a lit forest
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453. It's all good
'Cause a real one kept the shit goin'
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454. If it ain't what I'm talkin'
Then why we talkin', homey?
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455. If it ain't what I'm talkin'
Then why we talkin', homey?
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456. If it ain't what I'm talkin'
Then why we talkin', homey?
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457. So turn it up a little in the middle
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458. It's the S to the N, double-O, P
D, O, double-G, that's me
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459. Kickin' it for ya
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460. Never, ever need no lawyer
'Cause I dropped it for ya
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461. And bring it right back on time
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462. And I'ma hit you with a quick li'l rhyme
Dime
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463. What you talkin' 'bout?
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