Mystery Science Theater 3000 4x4

1. LET'S GO.

2. - CAMBOT. - PAN LEFT.

3. HI, GIRL.

4. WHAT A COOL GUY.

5. A WISECRACKER.

6. YEAH, LET'S SEE IF WE CAN GET THIS ON.

7. UH, "CD/WP51." "RETURN."

8. OH, CRIMINY. STUPID CLONES.

9. I REALLY MISS MY MACK.

10. HEY, CROW, WHAT'S THIS MEAN?

11. "TOO MANY PARAMENTERS-WP51."

12. WHAT? OH.

13. UH, YOU USED A FORWARD SLASH INSTEAD OF A BACKSLASH.

14. A WHAT? OH. OH, OKAY.

15. CD BACKSLASH WP51. RETURN.

16. JEEZ.

17. 30 SECONDS TO COMMERCIAL SIGN.

18. HI, EVERYONE. WELCOME BACK TO THE SATELLITE OF LOVE.

19. USER INTERFACE WAR.

20. LET'S WATCH.

21. OH, THIS IS RICH. "BAD COMMAND OR FILE NAME."

22. BOY, THEY EXPECT YOU

23. TO OPERATE THIS MACHINE.

24. OH, AND I SUPPOSE YOU'D PREFER A LITTLE, ANIMATED CLOWN

25. AND POINT TO THE RIGHT DRAWER.

26. WELL, YEAH, SURE.

27. AT LEAST I DON'T HAVE TO HAVE

28. TO GET MY MAC TO WORK.

29. WORK PERFECTLY WELL.

30. IT'S REALLY JUST A MATTER OF THE INDIVIDUAL'S PERSONAL PREFERENCE.

31. WE THINK THE JOKE'LL BE ON TOM SERVO AND CROW.

32. NOW HERE. THE PROBLEM WITH IBMs AND COMPATIBLES

33. AND INTUITIVE NATURE OF THE MAC.

34. MAC PRODUCTS ARE RELIABLE, PROVEN, AND THEY ALWAYS WORK.

35. OH, YEAH? WHAT ABOUT SYSTEM SEVEN?

36. IT'S COMING! IT'S COMING, OKAY?

37. IN IT, OKAY?

38. IN COMPUTER NUANCE.

39. WATCH THIS. HEY, HAS ANYBODY SEEN THE MOUSE FOR MY AMIGA?

40. - AMIGA! - AMIGA? OH, COME ON.

41. THERE'S A MACHINE FOR YOU.

42. YEAH. HEY, HAS ANYONE SEEN MY ANGUS DRIVE?

43. IN FIVE, FOUR, THREE, TWO...

44. COMMERCIAL SIGN NOW.

45. OH, NOW THIS IS REALLY, REALLY NEAT.

46. "UNRECOVERABLE APPLICATION ERROR."

47. THIS IS REALLY CUTE, CROW.

48. WE'LL HAVE TO RE-ENTER

49. SPREADSHEET NOW, HMM?

50. NO. NO, NO, NO.

51. THE MEMORY MANAGER.

52. THAT'S ALL. JUST TAKE A MINUTE.

53. DON'T WORRY.

54. REBOOT THE DANG THING, SEE WHAT HAPPENS.

55. YEAH, WHILE, UH, TOM SERVO'S REBOOTING THE COMPUTER,

56. UH, I THOUGHT IT'D BE A GOOD TIME

57. TO SHOW THIS WEEK'S INVENTION EXCHANGE.

58. AND, UH, WHAT I'VE GET HERE—

59. LET ME TURN IT ON A SECOND.

60. EXPAND PEOPLE'S CONSCIOUSNESS.

61. YOU KNOW, JOEL, THERE'S SOME THINGS

62. THAT PEOPLE SHOULDN'T BE CONSCIOUS ABOUT.

63. LIKE WHAT?

64. WELL, LIKE THE FACT

65. ALL DAY, ALL NIGHT, EVEN WHEN THEY SLEEP.

66. YECH.

67. UH, CHATTER BOT, WOULD YOU LET ME FINISH?

68. I'M TALKING ABOUT EXPANDING PEOPLE'S CONSCIOUSNESS

69. ABOUT THE RECYCLING CAUSE.

70. THAT'S WHY I BUILT THIS AUDIO ANIMATRONIC POP CAN HERE.

71. FOR MANY EVENINGS.

72. YEAH, SO WHAT I THOUGHT

73. FOR, LIKE,

74. WHEN WE GET BACK TO EARTH.

75. HERE'S A BAFFLER WORTH TWICE THE PRICE.

76. YEAH, WHATEVER.

77. ANYWAY, CROW, LET'S DO THAT THING

78. AND I'LL MANIPULATE THE CAN.

79. YOU DO THE VOICE, OKAY?

80. ALL RIGHT. OKAY.

81. LOVE THIS ONE.

82. HELLO, FOLKS. REMEMBER, I RECYCLE.

83. GOODNIGHT.

84. NO SKILL REQUIRED. OH, THIS IS RICH.

85. STANDS RIGID INSPECTION.

86. A QUALITY PRODUCT.

87. WHAT DO YOU THINK, SIRS?

88. I THINK YOU'VE GOT A KOOKY SCREW LOOSE, IS WHAT I THINK.

89. OH, WE HAVE FUN.

90. OH, QUIT YOUR CLOWNING, ITCHY MANGO,

91. AND GO AND GET YOUR HARNESS ON. ALL OF IT.

92. DISCO'S BACK, FROG BAIT, AND SO AM I.

93. DISCO CUMMER BUBBLE BUND.

94. ENTER FRANK.

95. THAT'S IT, BABY. WORK THAT BODY.

96. MAKE IT BURN. THERE YOU GO.

97. THERE'S A GOOD ONE.

98. OH, ANOTHER GOOD ONE, FRANK.

99. YES. COME ON. YOU CAN MAKE A BUBBLE.

100. TOGETHER AND SQUEEZE.

101. YES. I HAVE SEEN THE FUTURE OF HIP HOP, JOEL,

102. AND IT IS FRANK.

103. THIS WEEK,

104. IT'S ANOTHER IN A LONG LINE

105. TURTLE MOVIES.

106. THIS ONE'S FEATURING BARUGON,

107. WHO'S SORT OF

108. WITH ITCHY SCALP.

109. AND SHOVE IT, JOEL.

110. WELL, YOU SEE, YOU CAN PRESS IT BACK DOWN AGAIN, CROW,

111. 'CAUSE HE'S A ROCK 'EM SOCK 'EM ROBOT—

112. OH, WE GOT MOVIE SIGN!

113. YOU KNOW,

114. FOR SOME REASON.

115. WATER. THE SOURCE OF ALL SANDY FRANK FILMS.

116. HEY, LOOKS LIKE A KID WROTE THIS WITH A CRAYON.

117. OH, I WOULDN'T FOR ONE NEGATE NAGATA.

118. YOU GOTTA, THOUGH.

119. OH, PLANNING. I HATE WHEN HE PLANS.

120. THERE'S NEVER ENOUGH BUNS.

121. FLYING PIPERS DRUM CORPS.

122. HEY, I THINK I SEE MY LAUNDRY.

123. A LITTLE BACKGROUND FIRST.

124. SIX MONTHS AGO,

125. THE ARCTIC OCEAN.

126. - SEEN IN. - HATED IT.

127. TAPED IT.

128. SHATTERING

129. AND RELEASING FROM THE DEPTHS, GAMERA...

130. BILL GAMERA.

131. WHO HAD BEEN

132. FOR THOUSANDS OF YEARS.

133. HEY, BILL.

134. FREE AT LAST, FREE AT LAST,

135. I'M FREE AT LAST.

136. WAS TO ATTACK JAPAN.

137. OOH.

138. AGAINST HIM.

139. WERE POWERLESS AGAINST HIM.

140. THE "Z" PLAN.

141. TO MARS IN A ROCKET.

142. AGAIN, THERE WAS FAILURE.

143. AND DEEP, PERSONAL SHAME.

144. AND SPLIT OPEN,

145. FROM THE CAPSULE.

146. AND MAYBE, JUST MAYBE, IN A SMALL WAY,

147. EVERYWHERE.

148. HMM.

149. AND ATTACKED THE KUROBE DAM,

150. IN THE ENTIRE ORIENT.

151. SO YOU KNOW IT'S GOOD.

152. HAVE A SOURCE OF FUEL,

153. AND SO, FROM THE POWER PLANT,

154. TO STORE IN HIS OWN BODY.

155. WEIRD, HUH?

156. HMM. HEY.

157. HEY. WHAT'S THAT?

158. HEY, IT'S GAMERA!

159. GAMERA!

160. OH, YOU KNOW, I THOUGHT HE LOOKED FAMILIAR.

161. LOOK OUT!

162. OH, DAM.

163. HEY, STOP TALKING! ONE AT A TIME!

164. ALL AT THE SAME TIME.

165. CHICKEN POT PIE, KIND OF.

166. HMM.

167. OOH.

168. I JUST CAN'T GET CLOSE TO ANYONE ANYMORE!

169. OH, YOU MEN. TURN OFF THE MAIN SWITCHES!

170. BONG.

171. OH, YOU GOT HIM.

172. HUH. FUNNY. IN COLOR, I EXPECTED GAMERA

173. OF A STRAWBERRY BLONDE.

174. HE'S KIND OF A TAWNY...

175. CAMERA PUTS ON 50.000 POUNDS.

176. OH, LUNCH FOR ME? OH, THANK YOU.

177. PLAYING THE TRUMPET BADLY?

178. OH, YOU MEAN LIKE CHUCK MANGIONE?

179. TOKYO, I THINK IT'S TIME

180. ABOUT SOLAR POWER.

181. AH, HE CAN'T RESIST.

182. HE'S A SLAVE TO HIS OWN PASSION.

183. THE CREAMY TASTE OF FLAMES.

184. OH, NOW WAS THAT NECESSARY, YOUNG MAN?

185. I MEAN...

186. CHARBROILED CITY.

187. CHARBROILED CITY.

188. CHARBROILED...

189. OOH.

190. MAN, HE'S GOT A SHORT REACH.

191. AT 7.500 DEGREES...

192. QUICK, GET THE KC MASTERPIECE SAUCE.

193. THIS TIME.

194. WHOA!

195. MOVE IT.

196. - HEY, HURRY UP. - COME ON.

197. OH, I'M FULL.

198. OH, YOU KNOW WHAT YOU WANNA DO IS,

199. AND DIP IT IN THAT SAUCE THERE.

200. OH, THAT'S REALLY SUPER NEAT.

201. OH, YEAH. TRY THE LEMON.

202. WELL, THAT REMINDS ME.

203. WHEN I GET BACK TO EARTH.

204. HUH?

205. BYE.

206. WHOA, IT LOOKS LIKE WEMBLEY STADIUM AFTER A SOCCER MATCH.

207. OH, THERE'S A LOT OF STUFF GOING ON DOWN THERE.

208. SO...

209. OOPS. THAT WAS ME. MY FAULT.

210. UH, SORRY. CAN'T SEE.

211. MY HEAD'S INSIDE, YOU KNOW.

212. HIGHER, GAMERA, HIGHER.

213. ABOUT 50 FEET UP. OKAY, BACK UP AND PUSH.

214. UH-OH.

215. OF ALKA SELTZER.

216. I CAN'T BELIEVE GAMERA ATE THE WHOLE THING.

217. HE ATE IT, RALPH.

218. LOOK, WATER,

219. WE KNOW. WE KNOW.

220. OOH.

221. GAMERA LOVES FLAMES.

222. TO HIS HIPS.

223. AS HE HAD ARRIVED,

224. AND THE EQUATOR,

225. THE FLOWING MOLTEN LAVA.

226. WITH WHAM-O.

227. HMM.

228. WHEN IN CLEVELAND,

229. VISIT THE GOLDEN DRAGON INN,

230. ONLY 15 MINUTES FROM OUR CINEMA.

231. SKY KING, THE MOTION PICTURE.

232. TELL ME, ARE YOU REALLY GOING TO RESIGN?

233. YEAH. THIS IS MY LAST DAY UP HERE.

234. DOWN THERE.

235. BUT YOU'VE JUST

236. DEDICATED WORK.

237. CLARENCE.

238. TO QUIT?

239. TIRED OF FLYING ALREADY?

240. CERTAINLY NOT.

241. IS TO CONTINUE FLYING.

242. AND HAVE MY VOICE DUBBED.

243. WOULD BE WORTHLESS.

244. SO THAT'S WHY I'M QUITTING NOW.

245. - I WANT TO LEARN MORE. - YOU SHOULD TOO.

246. I WILL BE MORE SKILLED.

247. FAIR ENOUGH.

248. HEY, DIDN'T GEORGE HARRISON WRITE THIS SONG?

249. YEAH. "MY SWEET WARLORD."

250. OH, THAT'S CUTE.

251. 331/3, I THINK.

252. HEY, I NEVER COULD SOUND THIS GOOD.

253. OH, IT'S THE JOY LUCK CLUB BLUES BAND.

254. COME ON. PLAY IT LIKE YOU FEEL IT, MR. EDDIE'S FATHER.

255. AND NOW IT'S PINK LADY UNPLUGGED.

256. AH, THIS OUGHT TO SHUT 'EM UP.

257. COME ON. OH, THEY'RE NOT THAT BAD.

258. UH, GANG, MAYBE YOU SHOULDN'T BE SMOKING

259. AROUND ALL THOSE THINGS, HMM?

260. HMM.

261. LOOKS LIKE AN AVOCADO.

262. HEY, CAN THE PINEAPPLE. IT'S SOMEBODY.

263. SHH. IXNAY.

264. I'LL GET IT. AH, DAMN CHARLIE HORSE.

265. SITTING ON MY LEG.

266. HMM?

267. SUPER FLY?

268. OH, IT'S YOU.

269. GOT 'EM.

270. COME IN.

271. TEA, BISCUITS?

272. MY BROTHER.

273. HI, I'M DANGEROUS TO MYSELF AND OTHERS.

274. HERE'S ALL MY MONEY.

275. HOW MUCH?

276. IT'S MY PENSION.

277. - OOH. - 50 BUCKS.

278. NOT A BIG HELP.

279. YEAH, IT'S NO USE WORKING FOR OTHERS.

280. I'VE GOT TO GET MY OWN AIRCRAFT COMPANY.

281. - NOW. - HOWEVER SMALL.

282. THAT'LL TAKE MONEY.

283. AND YOU DON'T HAVE ANY. HE JUST TOOK IT.

284. NAH, NAH.

285. WELL, NOW THAT WE'RE ALL HERE,

286. I'LL TELL YOU THE PLANS.

287. DURING THE WAR, I FOUND A HUGE OPAL.

288. HMM. BIG.

289. BELIEVE ME, IT WAS ABOUT THE SIZE OF AN OSTRICH EGG.

290. OH, IT GETS BIGGER EVERY TIME HE TELLS THE STORY.

291. TO A PRISONER OF WAR CAMP,

292. - I MANAGED TO... - DID YOU EVER GET OUT?

293. AGAIN IN THE CAVE WHERE I FOUND IT.

294. THAT WAS 20 YEARS AGO.

295. DON'T MENTION THE WAR.

296. NEVER GO.

297. I THINK THAT IT'LL BE SAFE.

298. WE'LL BE TAKING A BIG GABLE.

299. ME LIKE GAMBLE.

300. WE'LL BE ABLE TO SELL IT FOR AN ABSOLUTE FORTUNE.

301. IT'S A REAL OPAL?

302. - IT'S REAL. - YEP.

303. IT MUST BE. AND THERE MIGHT BE MORE AS WELL.

304. SINCE I CAN'T GET AWAY,

305. KEISUKE, YOU GO.

306. NAME'S QUESADILLA.

307. - GLADLY. - YEAH.

308. ON A CARGO BOAT.

309. WITH CRUTCH CARGO. GET IT?

310. FALSE NAMES, AND YOU'LL CARRY FORGED PAPERS.

311. YOU GOT THEM?

312. OH, YEAH, YEAH. 'COURSE I HAVE.

313. COST ME A SMALL FORTUNE.

314. FOR THE FORGERY.

315. THIS IS FOR YOU. THIS ONE FOR YOU.

316. AND THE PASSWORD IS...

317. AS ORDINARY SEAMEN.

318. FOR GOD'S SAKE DON'T BUNGLE.

319. IN THE JUNGLE.

320. - WE'RE COUNTING ON YOU. - THANKS.

321. - OKAY? - OKAY.

322. NEW GUINEA IN 25 DAYS,

323. UNLOAD HERE, AND THEN CONTINUE AROUND THIS AREA.

324. A FORTNIGHT LATER.

325. IN WHICH TO LOCATE THE OPAL.

326. YOU MEAN WE'RE TO QUIT

327. AND THEN REBOARD IT AGAIN?

328. THAT'S DISHONEST!

329. DURING THE WAR.

330. OH, THAT'S RICH!

331. TO THE AIRPORT HERE,

332. YOU'LL HAVE TO CHARTER A HELICOPTER.

333. KEISUKE, YOU'LL BE ABLE TO FLY IT FOR THEM.

334. THAT'S WHY YOU'RE HERE.

335. AND NEXT, MONEY.

336. BLACK-MARKET DOLLARS WITH YOU.

337. ART LINKLETTER'S PICTURE ON THEM.

338. OF THE SCORPIONS.

339. AND WHITESNAKE.

340. YOU'VE HAD IT IF THEY STING.

341. OF MANY OTHER DANGERS AS WELL.

342. JUST TO BE SAFE.

343. AND DON'T RUN BY THE POOL.

344. TO CLEAN UP AFTER BABY.

345. YEAH, AND DON'T

346. YOU'VE EATEN.

347. ARE THOSE CHICK JEANS?

348. JUST WHO DO THEY THINK WE ARE, ANYWAY?

349. OH, STOP GRUMBLING. PATIENCE.

350. D'OH.

351. YOU, THAT ROOM'S FILTHY.

352. SO CLEAN IT!

353. DO IT YOURSELF.

354. IT'S TV's MR. T.

355. I PITY THOSE FOOLS.

356. WORKING HARD?

357. NO, HARDLY WORKING. IT'S THE...

358. WHY COULDN'T YOU FIND US SOME EASIER WORK TO DO?

359. JUST STICK WITH IT.

360. OH, HELP US OUT. COME ON, HUH?

361. THE WASHROOM TOO.

362. IT'S NO JOKE.

363. OH, SORRY. I FORGOT. I LAUGHED.

364. HEY. MY CABIN. TONIGHT.

365. ONLY THREE MORE DAYS.

366. ARE YOU ABSOLUTELY SURE? MM-HMM.

367. I'VE GOT A CALENDAR. I KNOW.

368. DON'T GIVE IT UP NOW.

369. OKAY.

370. NEARING THE SANTANA CONCERT,

371. OF OUR VW MICROBUS.

372. KILLER.

373. HEY, AND WE'RE JUST IN TIME TO SEE DON HO.

374. AND HIS SISTER HEIDI.

375. THEIR POLITICAL STANCES.

376. IT'S QUITE A STANCE TOO.

377. WISH I HAD A LAWNMOWER.

378. HEY.

379. IS SAYING,

380. "HOW ABOUT DINNER AND A MOVIE?"

381. THE FEMALE RESPONDS WITH,

382. "OKAY, BUT I'VE SEEN MANNEQUIN ALREADY."

383. TO GO TO SLEEP,

384. WANTS TO TALK.

385. CAN'T SEE.

386. WHAT, DID SOMEONE DROP A COKE BOTTLE ALL OF A SUDDEN?

387. ATTENTION ALL PERSONNEL.

388. TONIGHT'S MOVIE IS THE JUNGLE GODDESS,

389. STARRING GEORGE REEVES, A GUY WHO LOOKS LIKE ERNIE KOVACS,

390. FRENCH FRIED POTATOES.

391. HEY, WE'RE FROM AMERICA.

392. WE'VE COME TO DECIMATE YOUR JUNGLE,

393. CONVERT YOUR YOUTH, AND MAKE YOU FEEL INFERIOR.

394. LOOK, IT'S ROBERT DUVALL.

395. HELLO? ANYBODY HERE?

396. YOU KNOW, I SWEAR

397. HERE A MINUTE AGO.

398. DOESN'T MAKE—FIGURE. GO FIGURE.

399. HI. HOW WAS YOUR FLIGHT?

400. HEY, QUIT CLOWNING.

401. IT'S PROBABLY QUITE FAR TO THE CAVES.

402. AH.

403. OOH. THEY SEEM RUDE.

404. HEY, GET ME. I'M A STRANGER IN PARADISE.

405. BIG TIE.

406. - HUH? - HUH?

407. LOOK. THERE'S WRITING.

408. IT SAYS "YANKEES GO HOME."

409. IT'S A GUIDE POST.

410. IF WE CAN'T READ IT.

411. ARE THEY WORDS OR PICTURES?

412. UH-HUH.

413. HEY, GIVE ME THE MAP, WILL YOU?

414. SOMEWHERE.

415. HOO!

416. OH, WHO GOOSED ME?

417. PAT MORITA, DENTURE WEARER.

418. HEY, WATCH IT. DON'T WAVE THAT GUN.

419. - WE'RE QUITE SAFE. - YES, IT'S A MOVIE.

420. THEY'RE PLEASED.

421. DURING THE WAR.

422. THEY'RE GOOD PEOPLE.

423. SO BETTER LET ME KEEP IT.

424. GIVE IT HERE, HUH?

425. UH-OH.

426. I'LL, UH, SHOOT MYSELF TO PROVE WE'RE FRIENDLY.

427. HEY. ASK ONE OF 'EM TO BE OUR GUIDE.

428. HOW CAN I? NONE OF THEM UNDERSTAND US.

429. YOU'RE WRONG. I UNDERSTAND PERFECTLY.

430. HEY, HAS ANYBODY CALLED DIBS YET?

431. DIBS. DIBS.

432. OH, DARN. DARN.

433. BY NOW?

434. OH, IT'S MY DAD. I GOT TO GO NOW.

435. OH, IT'S TOM WOLFE.

436. OH, THANK GOD. THE CONTEMPORARY NOVEL IS SAVED.

437. DARN FOOL KID.

438. COME DIRECTLY FROM JAPAN?

439. YES. WHO ARE YOU?

440. A DOCTOR.

441. I'VE BEEN LIVING AND WORKING

442. FOR OVER TEN YEARS.

443. HE HAS TENURE THEN. TENURE.

444. TO STUDY CERTAIN DISEASES.

445. DISEASE HE WAS CURING.

446. CONVENIENT.

447. THE REST OF HIS LIFE.

448. WE'RE IMPRESSED.

449. IT IS QUIET HERE.

450. TO THIS PEACEFUL VILLAGE.

451. OF MY OWN HOME ANY LONGER.

452. NOT EVEN A LITTLE?

453. AND I'VE BEEN EXTREMELY FORTUNATE,

454. FOR KAREN IS MY ASSISTANT,

455. AND AN EXCELLENT ONE.

456. OH, WE GET THE PICTURE.

457. AH.

458. OH.

459. BY THE WAY,

460. TO SUCH A BACKWARDS SPOT?

461. THE WIND, MAN. THE WILD WIND.

462. WELL, SIR, WE'VE COME TO INVESTIGATE A CERTAIN CAVE.

463. IT ISN'T FAR FROM HERE.

464. HMM.

465. NO GO, NAVAJO. UH-UH.

466. DOCTOR. YOU KNOW WHERE THE CAVE IS?

467. OH, YOU MUST NOT GO NEAR THAT CAVE.

468. BELIEVE ME.

469. AND WHY NOT?

470. IT'S CALLED RAINBOW VALLEY.

471. THE CARE BEARS LIVE THERE.

472. WHAT IS THAT?

473. ON THAT STONE, THERE'S A WARNING TO ALL.

474. IT SAYS "WARNING."

475. IT FORBIDS US TO GO THERE,

476. WILL NOT RETURN.

477. BUT WHY?

478. NOBODY KNOWS.

479. THE TROUBLE I'VE SEEN.

480. IT STOOD THERE THOUSANDS OF YEARS, SO THEY SAY.

481. ONLY A FOOL WOULD DISOBEY.

482. DWELLS THERE,

483. THE VALLEY OF THE RAINBOW.

484. GO ON.

485. WILL ACT AS OUR GUIDE?

486. CERTAINLY NOT.

487. ARE BEGGING YOU NOT TO GO.

488. ON THIS POINT.

489. NECK BRACE SAYS SO.

490. ALL RIGHT, HUDDLE UP, EVERYBODY.

491. BRING IT IN. COME ON. BRING IT IN.

492. DARN TOURISTS.

493. HA.

494. THEY DON'T ANYONE TO GO NEAR THAT CAVE.

495. THAT THERE'S HIDDEN TREASURE THERE?

496. OF COURSE. AND THEY'VE

497. TO PROTECT IT.

498. MY BROTHER MENTIONED THEN.

499. WE'LL NEVER GET A GUIDE FROM THEM.

500. AH, I'LL HAVE TO CALL KELLY GIRLS.

501. LET'S GO ALONE. THIS WAY.

502. DOES BELONG TO THESE NATIVES?

503. SO? WE'RE GONNA TAKE IT ANYWAY.

504. OKAY. HEY, LET'S GO.

505. - BUT I— - LET'S GO.

506. NO! NO! YOU MUSTN'T GO IN THERE.

507. WAIT! DON'T GO!

508. DISTURBED NATIVE REBUTTAL.

509. DON'T! DON'T GO IN THERE.

510. OH!

511. HEY, WATCH OUT!

512. ALL RIGHT, ALL RIGHT.

513. I DIDN'T THINK THIS GUN WOULD COME IN HANDY SO SOON.

514. RIGHT. NOW, LET'S GO.

515. A LITTLE STEAM.

516. GOTTA GO.

517. OH, WE GOTTA GO TOO.

518. NICE MEETING YOU FOLKS.

519. THANKS FOR EVERYTHING.

520. WHAT FOOLS.

521. PEAS AND CARROTS.

522. AND WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK RIGHT AFTER THIS.

523. KIDS, HERE'S THE GREATEST

524. 5.000-PIECE FIGHTIN' MEN AND MONSTER SET.

525. SOME PIECES NOT INCLUDED.

526. WHILE YOU PULVERIZE JAPAN.

527. HERE'S WHAT YOU GET—

528. 500 JAPANESE LIGHT INFANTRY.

529. MAY NOT BE MISSING.

530. 36 HELPLESS OFFICIALS,

531. 20 TANKS, 15 RECOILLESS RIFLES.

532. NOT IN THIS SET.

533. 24 BAZOOKA GUM RUNNERS.

534. 18 AMBULANCE CHASERS.

535. 12 JET FIGHTERS. STICK NOT INCLUDED.

536. 16 HELICOPTER PARTS,

537. 200 SHOOTING CROUCHERS,

538. 19 FIGHTING CLOWNS, EIGHT DESERTERS,

539. SIX GEESE A-LAYING,

540. 24 MOHAWK INDIANS, AND MUCH, MUCH, MUCH, MUCH MORE.

541. MONSTER ACTION PACK.

542. FLAME ON WITH GAMERA. TORSO SOLD SEPARATELY.

543. AND CAUSES REAL PAIN.

544. RAM TONGUE ACTION.

545. FOR NERVE DAMAGE.

546. WITH TOPO, MEEP SONG, AND BART THE BATTLIN' BELGIAN ENDIVE.

547. SOME PARTS MAY NOT EXIST.

548. ACT NOW, ACT OFTEN,

549. TOKYO METROPOLITAN AREA,

550. COMPLETE WITH BUILDINGS, BRIDGES,

551. MOUNT INUKO DAM.

552. SMALLER THAN SHOWN.

553. CITIZEN PLAY SET,

554. ANTI-WAR PROTEST PACK.

555. NOT INCLUDED.

556. BUT THAT'S NOT ALL.

557. WITH THE LIGHTS, GAMERA, GAMERA ACTION SERIES.

558. THERE'S THE GIMP, THE GOON, THE SHAME-FILLED BROTHER,

559. THE HAPLESS GEISHA, AND THE PULL-APART VOODOO KENNY.

560. WITH THE FRISKY KITTEN REVIEW,

561. YOU CREATE EXPLODES,

562. AND ENDLESS PAIN. ORDER TODAY.

563. OFFER LIMITED. NOT AVAILABLE IN UTAH,

564. PRICE IS SUBJECT TO END. PLEASE WEAR RUBBER UNDERWEAR,

565. MAY BE MADE OF CHICKEN.

566. ACT NOW, BUY BONDS...

567. MOMMY, MOMMY, MOMMY!

568. OKAY. OKAY. BREATHE, BOY. BREATHE.

569. OH. MOMMY.

570. ALL RIGHT, THAT WAS A GOOD ONE.

571. LET'S NOT DO THAT AGAIN.

572. HERE'S SOMETHING WE THINK YOU'LL REALLY LIKE.

573. MOMMY.

574. IT'S ALL RIGHT. THAT'S OKAY.

575. HEY, I FOUND MY HAMSTER.

576. LOOKING FOR AGAIN?

577. WHAT DOES IT LOOK LIKE?

578. HMM?

579. HUH?

580. A BOWLING BALL?

581. HEY! IT'S HERE! IT'S HERE!

582. EARL ANTHONY'S SIGNATURE.

583. I'M CRYING.

584. OUR GAMBLE PAID OFF.

585. NEAT.

586. WE GOT THE OPAL. IT'S OURS.

587. THOSE MEN, NO WONDER THEY TRIED TO STOP US.

588. THAT WAS FAST.

589. NOW WE'RE MULTI-MILLIONAIRES.

590. JUST WAIT TILL I GET HOME.

591. I'LL BUY A GREAT,

592. STOCKED FULL OF FOOD AND WINE.

593. OF ALL THE DUMB LUCK.

594. UH-OH. YOU GOT A LITTLE, UH...

595. RUBBER SCORPION.

596. SHE'LL BURST WITH HAPPINESS.

597. I'LL DO JUST WHAT I PLEASE FROM NOW ON.

598. - JUST THINK. - NO MORE BROCCOLI.

599. YOU'LL OWN AN AIRCRAFT COMPANY.

600. I'M SO PLEASED I SHALL GO MAD.

601. ONODERA, YOU SAY SOMETHING, HUH?

602. UH, ANY LAST WORDS?

603. HEY, ONODERA, AREN'T YOU HAPPY THAT WE FOUND IT?

604. UH, FRIENDSHIP IS WORTH MUCH MORE THAN THE OPAL TO ME.

605. TO BE GOOD.

606. HIRATAS, YOU'RE A GOOD FRIEND.

607. WITH US.

608. IT'S FUN.

609. THINK HOW HAPPY HE'LL BE THAT WE FOUND IT.

610. OH, YEAH. I WISH I COULD TELL HIM.

611. HEY, HIRATA!

612. OLLIE, OLLIE, IN FREE.

613. WE FOUND THE OPAL ALREADY!

614. BOY, IS HE HIGH.

615. EXCUSE ME. DEATH, WHERE IS THY STING?

616. WE'RE WAITING.

617. WHAT AN ECCENTRIC PERFORMANCE.

618. BINGO.

619. OOP, TIME TO BREAK OUT THE BACTINE.

620. WELL, AT LEAST HE'S DYING A MILLIONAIRE.

621. I'LL GET THE FIRST AID KIT.

622. PUSH DOWN ON THE WOUND.

623. DON'T GO!

624. FOR ONE BRIEF,

625. THERE WAS A CAMELOT.

626. OOH. PUT A TOURNIQUET ON HIS NECK.

627. IT'S DARK!

628. OOH. KISS IT AND MAKE IT BETTER.

629. OKAY, BEAR DOWN. PUSH.

630. AH, IT'S A BOY. CONGRATULATIONS.

631. KAWAJIRI! KAWAJIRI!

632. HURRY!

633. KAWAJIRI, YOU'VE NEVER GIVEN UP ON ANYTHING BEFORE.

634. DON'T QUIT NOW, MAN.

635. KAWAJIRI! KAWAJIRI!

636. TOM AND JERRY? WHAT?

637. HIS FAVORITE CARTOON.

638. OOH. WE HAD SO MUCH MORE TO DO.

639. HE DIED AS HE LIVED. GOOFY.

640. MM-HMM.

641. HEY, I HURT TOO, MAN.

642. HE WAS UNLUCKY.

643. HEY, I'M DEALING WITH IT. WHY CAN'T YOU?

644. CAN I HAVE YOUR WATCH?

645. SO, LUNCH?

646. DON'T CRY. IT'S NO USE.

647. LET'S GO.

648. COME ON, MAN.

649. YEAH, WE STILL GOT A THOUSAND WONDERFUL HOURS.

650. HEY, LET'S PUT HIM IN A REAL SCARY POSE.

651. WELL, THERE'S ONE GOOD THING AT LEAST.

652. WE'VE GOT THE OPAL.

653. WE MIGHT AS WELL GET GOING.

654. COME ON. YOU CAN'T BRING HIM BACK TO LIFE.

655. WUSS.

656. OH.

657. FOR SAFETY, I'LL KEEP THE OPAL. HMM?

658. YEAH, I'M BETTER NOW. I'M ALL RIGHT.

659. HUH?

660. HEY, NOW. DON'T YOU TRUST ME WITH IT?

661. WELL, I, UH... TRUST?

662. HMM.

663. YOU CAN KEEP THE OPAL.

664. I'LL TAKE THE GUN.

665. SORRY. THERE'S A SEVEN-DAY WAITING PERIOD ON THAT GUN.

666. HUH.

667. - OKAY. - GOOD DEAL.

668. ONE, TWO, THREE, GRAB IT.

669. - WAIT. - IT'S A FOOTBALL PHONE.

670. HIDDEN IN THE CAVE.

671. HMM.

672. I'LL BET OURS ISN'T THE ONLY ONE.

673. LET'S LOOK, NOW THAT WE'RE IN HERE.

674. HEY, STEVE, DEAD BUDDY,

675. TO GET THE GUN FOR THE OPAL?

676. - I DID IT FOR YOU. - OOH!

677. MM. NIPPLE?

678. THE BODY.

679. HEY, THAT'S MY FAMILY.

680. WONDER WHAT HIS SIGN WAS. SCORPIO?

681. - BING.

682. TICKLE. TICKLE.

683. NO ORGAN DONOR CARD.

684. YOU KNOW, IT'S A BRUNSWICK.

685. I'M GONNA BOWL A 300 WITH THIS BABY.

686. OH, HEY, THAT'S NOT BEING SUPPORTIVE

687. OF YOUR FRIEND'S FEELINGS.

688. AT LEAST HE'S LIGHTING A FEW CANDLES FOR THE GUY.

689. YEAH, THAT'S GOOD.

690. I DON'T THINK THOSE ARE CANDLES.

691. SPARKLERS.

692. AW, THE ROADRUNNER'S NEVER GONNA FALL FOR THIS.

693. HUH?

694. SURPRISE!

695. HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU.

696. OH.

697. FILMED IN SENSURROUND.

698. IRWIN ALLEN.

699. AH, SHOOT. I SHOULD HAVE BEEN OUT OF THE CAVE FIRST.

700. WHAT WAS I THINKING?

701. BEFORE BLOWING IT UP.

702. ME AND MY BOOTY.

703. SPEAKING OF.

704. EASY ON THE VERMOUTH, PLEASE.

705. AND SHAKEN, NOT STIRRED. PLEASE.

706. OH, MY SALAD. I'M KIDDING.

707. COME HERE.

708. NOW!

709. GUESS NOT.

710. SAIGON. CAN'T BELIEVE I'M STILL IN SAIGON.

711. AW, HE'S MISSING THE LUAU.

712. OH, HE CAN WAIT.

713. IN THIS PLACE?

714. WE FOUND YOU IN TIME.

715. YOU WOULD HAVE BEEN DEAD...

716. MINUTES LATER.

717. BUT DON'T THINK THAT WE SAVED YOU OUT OF KINDNESS.

718. LIKE OUR MEAT FRESH.

719. IT'S FAIRLY CLEAR.

720. FOUND SOMETHING IN THE CAVE.

721. MAYBE.

722. HE'S GONE. THERE'S NO NEED TO COVER FOR HIM.

723. HE BETRAYED YOU, DIDN'T HE?

724. IN A WAY.

725. ALL OF WHAT WE FOUND.

726. AN OPAL.

727. AN OBOE?

728. OPAL?

729. YES, HUGE. IT WAS AS BIG OF THAT.

730. OH, YOU'RE THINKING OF AN OCARINA.

731. INSIDE THAT CAVE 20 YEARS AGO.

732. HMM.

733. BETWEEN US ALL.

734. DAD, DAD, HE SAID "OPAL" TO ME.

735. WE'RE GONNA BE MARRIED!

736. OH. I'M HUNGRY.

737. HEY, YOU GOT ANY TOAST, OR— OH.

738. MAN. I GOT TO GET A COAT HANGER DOWN THIS THING.

739. IT'S ITCHING LIKE A BEAR.

740. NOW WHAT?

741. GET YOUR POPCORN, PEANUTS,

742. JEWEL THIEVES, FROSTY MALTS.

743. BOB HOPE'S OUT THERE.

744. I THINK OUR FRIEND'S ABOUT TO BECOME A CASSEROLE.

745. I BETTER GET A PLAN. QUICK.

746. I GOTTA THINK OF SOMETHING.

747. BACK TO HENRY CHINASKI.

748. TO GO IN THE CAVE,

749. AND NOW LOOK WHAT HAPPENS!

750. OH, IT'S ALL RIGHT. GAUGUIN'S HERE.

751. TELL HIM, DAD.

752. WHAT ARE THEY DOING?

753. IT'S A LONG DRUM SOLO.

754. IT'S NOT YOUR PLACE TO ASK.

755. THEY ARE PRAYING.

756. OF THE GODS.

757. CURSE OF THE GODS?

758. CANNOT EXPLAIN.

759. WILL HAPPEN...

760. DIDN'T SOMETHING TERRIBLE JUST HAPPEN?

761. DEPEND ON ITS RETURN.

762. I SEE.

763. THE OPAL'S WORTH THAT MUCH, HUH?

764. HAS NO MONETARY VALUE.

765. OH, TAKE THE MARBLES OUT OF YOUR MOUTH, OLD MAN.

766. SO, UH, WHOSE LINE IS IT?

767. YOURS, MINE? ARE WE DONE?

768. IS THAT A WRAP? OH, WE'RE STILL ROLLING.

769. DOCTOR, LET ME GET IT BACK FROM JAPAN.

770. NO, YOU CAN'T.

771. YOU'RE A GIRL.

772. I WILL GO.

773. OH, NO.

774. WHO NEED YOU DESPERATELY.

775. I WILL GO TO JAPAN.

776. YOU CAN'T.

777. YOU'VE NEVER EVEN BEEN THERE.

778. IT WOULDN'T BE SANE FOR YOU TO GO OFF ALONE.

779. I HAVE NO CHOICE.

780. TO SAVE THESE PEOPLE.

781. MY CHILD.

782. ASK HIM TO GO WITH ME.

783. LISTEN. THE THING YOU FOUND WASN'T A GEM.

784. THAT IT WAS AN OPAL?

785. WELL, YEAH. WHO DOESN'T?

786. WE'RE AFRAID MISFORTUNE WILL FOLLOW.

787. THAT'S WHY WE ARE PRAYING.

788. YOU DON'T EXPECT ME TO BELIEVE THAT STORY, DO YOU?

789. HA.

790. WILL HAPPEN NOW.

791. THAT THE GODS WILL BE ANGRY.

792. YOU'VE DISOBEYED THE ORDER.

793. TO VISIT THE VALLEY.

794. HO, HO, HO.

795. YOU'VE TOUCHED SOMETHING EVIL AND FORBIDDEN.

796. OH, I SUPPOSE YOU'RE PERFECT.

797. WHAT IT CAN BE, I DON'T KNOW,

798. BUT IT'S CERTAINLY NOT A GEM.

799. HEY, IT'S THE START OF BONANZA.

800. HOSS, LITTLE JOE.

801. THANK GOD THEY USED DOWNEY.

802. THE TIME TUNNEL. IN COLOR.

803. I THINK IT'S MACKEREL

804. AND A DOLLOP OF CREAM.

805. OR MAYBE NOT.

806. IT'S OUT OF FOCUS, WHATEVER IT IS.

807. A PIECE OF LIVER.

808. THIS MOVIE IS FASCINATING.

809. NOT.

810. YOU KNOW, I THINK IT'S A BALLPARK FRANK.

811. SEE, IT'S PLUMPING AS HE COOKS IT.

812. OH.

813. WELL, I THINK WE'VE

814. THAT IT IS NOT AN OPAL.

815. UGH.

816. LIKE SOMETHING FROM THE OVEN.

817. CAUTION—FILLING IS HOT. AND ALIVE.

818. AND SO THE EGG,

819. YOUNG AND BLUE,

820. SEARCHES FOR ITS MOTHER.

821. HEY, LITTLE MUC-Y GUY.

822. HEY, SONNY ROLLINS IS PRACTICING ON THE BRIDGE AGAIN.

823. HEY, DOCTOR. PLAY ONE MORE GAME, HUH?

824. WELL, I HOPE THAT I'LL BE ABLE TO WIN IT.

825. SOMEBODY GET THAT GUY A BRA.

826. IT'S GETTING LATE.

827. WE AREN'T GOING TO SHORE TILL TOMORROW.

828. AREN'T WE?

829. WON'T OPEN.

830. HEY, LOOK. IT'S A CLOWN.

831. OPEN IT.

832. PUT THIS FLOWER THERE.

833. TO YOUR DEAD FRIEND.

834. NOT NOW. SOME OTHER TIME.

835. HEY, IT'S THE DJ FROM DEEE-LIGHT.

836. YOU SEE, MY FATHER DIED ON THAT ISLAND.

837. DOESN'T SEEM

838. LIKE A STRANGER TO ME.

839. OPEN IT.

840. PLEASE GIVE HIM THE KEY.

841. I GOT BOARDWALK, PARK PLACE.

842. OH!

843. HEY, WHO TOOK THE TIRES OFF THE DOCK?

844. NEXT WEEK ON "VOYAGE TO THE BOTTOM OF THE SEA."

845. WHAT'S GOING ON HERE?

846. ENGINE ROOM. GIVE ME THE ENGINE ROOM.

847. CAPTAIN. CAPTAIN.

848. UH-OH.

849. GOODBYE, MOM. BYE.

850. HEY, JAKE AND ELWOOD.

851. HMM.

852. CAB CALLOWAY.

853. THAT'S A SHIP.

854. WHAT'S HAPPENING.

855. TOY BOAT. TOY BOAT. TOY BOAT.

856. HIRATA, YOU SURE THEY'VE GOT THE OPAL?

857. ALL RIGHT, THEN. LET ME SEE IT.

858. YOU'RE ASKING A VERY HIGH PRICE.

859. YES, YES.

860. I KNOW.

861. OOH, AT 7:00 A.M. THE MAIN HATCHWAY CAVED IN.

862. THE ELLA FITZGERALD.

863. HEY, ADAM CLAYTON POWELL.

864. ABANDON SHIP!

865. AAH! PANIC!

866. WHAT'S HAPPENED TO THE SHIP?

867. IT BLEW UP.

868. HEY, IT'S FUNNY GIRL, AND THERE'S BARBRA STREISAND.

869. McHALE!

870. TAXI. OH.

871. TAXI. OH.

872. CAB! GOING UPTOWN.

873. JEEP? OH.

874. WELCOME TO ELLIS ISLAND.

875. YOUR NAME IS NOW BOB SMITH.

876. ANDOLINI? NO, YOU'RE NOW CORLEONE.

877. I'LL NAME YOU APPETITE.

878. THANK YOU. HOPE YOU ENJOYED YOUR NORWEGIAN PRINCESS CRUISE.

879. OVER THERE.

880. TAKE THAT BLANKET.

881. OOPS. I WET 'EM.

882. HEY, DID YOU EVER SEE THE MOVIE PAPILLON?

883. I—I SAVED THIS.

884. HEY, THEY'RE GIVING AWAY FREE CLOTHES OVER THERE.

885. I WAS LUCKY. SOMETHING IMPORTANT.

886. SOMETHING IMPORTANT TOO.

887. WHAT DO YOU GOT THERE?

888. YOUR FRIEND'S BONES.

889. YOU CAN KEEP 'EM, YOU FOOL.

890. - HUH? - THEY'RE PIGS' BONES.

891. WAH, WAH, WAH.

892. PIGS' BONES?

893. EXCUSE ME. HAVE YOU COME FROM THAT SHIP?

894. I HAVE.

895. WHERE KEISUKE IS?

896. WHO'D YOU SAY?

897. CASEY KASEM?

898. UH, HE WAS A SEAMEN ON THE SAME SHIP.

899. UH, LET ME SEE.

900. EH, LET'S SEE. I'M A PSYCHIC.

901. THE GREAT CARNAC.

902. LET ME SEE, UM...

903. ONODERA! ONODERA.

904. - HUH? - HMM.

905. YOU'RE ALL RIGHT.

906. BUT WHERE'S MY BROTHER? KEISUKE.

907. CASEY KASEM?

908. BAD NEWS.

909. WHAT'S HAPPENED TO HIM THEN?

910. BAD NEWS.

911. SORRY.

912. SORRY.

913. HE'S DEAD.

914. HUH?

915. HE'S... DEAD?

916. MM. HE SLIPPED AND FELL.

917. ONTO SOME LIVE GRENADES.

918. SHH.

919. KAWAJIRI TOO.

920. KAWAJIRI? COWABUNGA.

921. I SEARCHED FOR THEM BOTH. THROUGH THE WHOLE CAVE.

922. FOR ABOUT TEN SECONDS.

923. BUT I COULDN'T FIND THEIR BODIES.

924. IT WAS TERRIBLE.

925. DID YOU FIND THE GEM?

926. DID YOU? I WANNA LOOK AT IT.

927. OF COURSE. I'VE GOT IT.

928. IS IT TRUE? IS IT?

929. LET ME SEE IT THEN.

930. WHEN THE SHIP DID.

931. HMM?

932. BY HIDING IT IN MY CABIN.

933. I DON'T BELIEVE YOU!

934. WELL, I'M TELLING YOU THE TRUTH.

935. ALL RIGHT, IT WASN'T MY CABIN.

936. THE SEA ISN'T VERY DEEP RIGHT HERE.

937. A DIVER CAN RETRIEVE IT.

938. NO, NO, NO. UH, UH, UH, UH.

939. NO, NO, NO, NO, NO. NO.

940. YOU'RE A FOOL TO THINK WE'LL EVER GET IT BACK.

941. WHEN I'VE FOUND IT.

942. TILL THEN, I'LL KEEP MY MONEY.

943. GOODBYE.

944. WELL, IT'S DOWN TO ME AND YOU

945. AND ME AND PART OF YOUR EYE.

946. BELIEVE ME?

947. HEY! WHAT'S THAT?

948. IT'S YOUR FINGER, AND IT'S POINTING.

949. DOPE.

950. OH, IT'S THE GHOST OF ESTHER WILLIAMS.

951. IT'S—NO, IT'S MR. BUBBLE,

952. AND BOY IS HE CHEESED.

953. IT'S A MR. BUBBLE POOL PARTY.

954. HELP, POLICE, THERE'S A MAN IN THE BATHTUB.

955. STOP, GRANDMA. IT'S ME.

956. WHAT'LL WE DO?

957. WE NEED MORE CALGON.

958. IN THE LOT WITH THEIR LIGHTS ON.

959. OH!

960. LOOK AT THAT!

961. HI, THERE. I'M A JUICY NEW CHARACTER.

962. ENJOY ME.

963. I'M WHAT'S KNOWN AS THE COMPLICATION.

964. THE ANTAGONIST, IF YOU WILL.

965. AAH!

966. WELL, FOR MY FIRST NUMBER,

967. I'D LIKE TO CRASH A WAREHOUSE.

968. IT'S AN OLD FAVORITE. I THINK YOU'RE GONNA LIKE IT.

969. SOMETHING LIKE THIS.

970. THANK YOU. THANK YOU VERY MUCH.

971. ON THE SULLIVAN SHOW,

972. BUT, UH, THEY ONLY FILMED ME FROM THE WAIST UP.

973. THEY SAY I FLIPPED 'EM OFF,

974. BUT IT'S JUST THE WAY MY FINGERS ARE CONSTRUCTED.

975. IF GAMERA CRAVES FIRE,

976. WHAT DOES BARUGON CRAVE?

977. UH, BEN AND JERRY'S CHERRY GARCIA.

978. NATCH.

979. HEY, I'M DOING MY OWN STUNTS.

980. IF WHOLESOME,

981. THEN CALL ME OLD-FASHIONED.

982. HEY, HEY, LOOK AT THE CLOWN JEEP.

983. OH.

984. COME, TINY TIM.

985. OH, BLESS US, EVERYONE.

986. YEAH, LET'S GET OUT OF HERE!

987. WAIT! ONODERA!

988. WE GET BACK TO OSAKA.

989. WHAT'D HE SAY?

990. WELL, ROUGHLY TRANSLATED, IT MEANS "BEAT CHEEKS."

991. OH.

992. HEY, DRAG THAT NURSE ALONG.

993. SHE MIGHT COME IN HANDY.

994. OH, HE'S LEAKING. UGH.

995. LIKE IT SO FAR? BUT WAIT. THERE'S MORE.

996. YOU CAN SEE RIGHT THROUGH THEM.

997. ABOUT THIS TIME,

998. AM I A DOG?

999. I DON'T EVEN KNOW. RUFF RUFF.

1000. JUST KIDDING.

1001. OH, NO. HE THINKS IT'S A GIANT FIRE HYDRANT.

1002. DON'T LIFT YOUR LEG, BOY.

1003. I THINK, UH...

1004. WHY DON'T YOU TREAT YOURSELF?

1005. YOU'RE A GROWING MONSTER. GO AHEAD.

1006. WHOA. HE GOT THAT FROM GENE SIMMONS.

1007. I'M YOUR BOYFRIEND NOW. BLAGH!

1008. - TIME TO GO? - TIME TO GO.

1009. - AW. - COME ON.

1010. I WANNA WATCH THE PUPPY.

1011. AND A BUMP SOMETIMES.

1012. OH, BUT I NEVER REALLY DRINK ANYTHING.

1013. YOU KNOW THAT. I'LL HAVE THE OCCASIONAL LIGHT BEER,

1014. HIS SCOTCH, YA KNOW.

1015. BUT ANYWAY, YOU'LL NEVER BELIEVE

1016. ABOUT THE STEWARD BOY.

1017. OH, I AM DYING. JUST TELL ME.

1018. APPARENTLY WHAT HE'S INTO—

1019. OKAY, HOW WAS EVERYTHING, LADIES?

1020. OH, YOU REALLY DID A NUMBER

1021. SUPER BELL GRANDE TREAT-A, DIDN'T YOU?

1022. OH, IT WAS GOOD, AND SO FILLING.

1023. OH, YES. EVERYTHING'S JUST WONDERFUL.

1024. I'M REALLY FULL.

1025. OKAY, GOOD. WELL, I'M GONNA BE HEADING BACK

1026. TO GET THE DESERT TRAY,

1027. AND, UH, DO YOU WANT ANYTHING?

1028. COFFEE, TEA, SHOT OF TEQUILA?

1029. HUH?

1030. HEAVENS NO. WE'RE FINE. THANK YOU.

1031. OKAY, I'LL BE RIGHT BACK. EXCUSE ME.

1032. AND SO CREATIVE.

1033. OH, HONEY, THEY ALL ARE.

1034. TO COME.

1035. OH, NOT EVERY DAY,

1036. BUT, YOU KNOW, A SPECIAL TREAT SOMETIMES.

1037. ON THE WALL HERE?

1038. OH, I LOVE THEM.

1039. OH, THEY DO IT UP SO COLORFUL.

1040. ON HALLOWEEN SOMETIME,

1041. 'CAUSE THEY ALL DRESS UP

1042. AND IT'S SUPER COLORFUL AND SO MUCH FUN.

1043. OKAY, HERE WE ARE, GIRLS.

1044. OH, MY. OH, WE'RE IN TROUBLE NOW, HONEY.

1045. NOW OVER HERE,

1046. WE'VE GOT TGI TOKYO'S BIGGEST SELLER.

1047. HERE IT IS. THE CHOCOLATE TOWERING INFERNO,

1048. AND IT IS DECADENT.

1049. BUT, UH, YOU PROBABLY DON'T LIKE CHOCOLATE, DO YOU?

1050. - OH, NO, I LOVE CHOCOLATE. - YES.

1051. I'M KIDDING. OF COURSE EVERYONE LOVES CHOCOLATE.

1052. UH, THIS ONE HERE YOU PROBABLY WOULDN'T BE INTERESTED IN.

1053. I'M JUST KIDDING. IT'S A LITTLE RICH, YOU KNOW.

1054. MURDER SUICIDE TORT.

1055. IT'S KIND OF SPICY AND IT HAS A LITTLE RUM IN IT,

1056. SO I'M GONNA HAVE TO SEE YOUR IDs, GIRLS.

1057. OH, YOU ARE SO SWEET. SO SWEET.

1058. ANYWAY,

1059. FOR ME TO EVEN PICK UP.

1060. WITH FUDGE SAUCE.

1061. AND YOU LOCK TONGUES WITH LOKI,

1062. OF HELL.

1063. I'M JUST KIDDING. IT'S A LITTLE RICH.

1064. CAN I GET YOU ONE?

1065. HONEY, THAT'S THE ONE I'M GONNA HAVE THERE.

1066. OH, NOTHING FOR ME, PLEASE.

1067. AND A DIET PEPSI PLEASE.

1068. ALL RIGHT, THAT'S GOOD.

1069. UH, ONE OF THOSE AND A DIET PEPSI.

1070. I'LL GET YOU A FORK JUST IN CASE YOU WANNA TRY IT, OKAY?

1071. - HE KNOWS ME SO WELL. - HE SURE DOES.

1072. - HE'S SUCH A CUTE BOY. - OH, SAY, WAITER.

1073. - OH, WAITER? - YEAH.

1074. UH, COULD WE HAVE SEPARATE CHECKS PLEASE?

1075. UH, I'M SORRY, LADIES, WE DON'T TO THAT HERE AT TGI TOKYO.

1076. - AH, WHAT A JERK. - NO KIDDING.

1077. - UH, LADIES... - YES?

1078. - WE HAVE MOVIE SIGN! - AAH!

1079. THAT WAS JUST DELIGHTFUL.

1080. OH, THAT WAS SWEET.

1081. OH, YOU GOT ANY TUMS IN THE CAR?

1082. I GOT A LITTLE GAS, I THINK.

1083. I GUESS WE'LL HAVE

1084. UNTIL THIS MONSTER'S DEAD.

1085. WE CAN'T PUT IT OFF FOREVER.

1086. IT'LL BE TOO LATE.

1087. THE JUNE WEDDING IS SO CLICHE.

1088. THE POLICE

1089. WITH THAT SHIP.

1090. OOH, THAT'S GOOD BOOZE.

1091. THEN WE'LL NEVER GET THE OPAL BACK.

1092. SO WE'LL HAVE TO ACT NOW.

1093. IT'S THE ONLY CHANCE WE'VE GOT TO FIND IT.

1094. FIRST, WE'LL NEED MONEY.

1095. OH, I'VE GOT QUITE A BIT OF MONEY PUT ASIDE.

1096. THAT'S GOOD. IS IT IN CASH?

1097. I HAVE A DOWRY. WE COULD LIVE WITH MY FOLKS.

1098. AND WE CAN HIRE THE DIVER.

1099. HIRATA! HIRATA.

1100. IS GETTING NEARER TO OSAKA.

1101. - WHAT? - HUH?

1102. THE RADIO SAYS SO.

1103. IT'LL KILL ALL OF US.

1104. LET'S LEAVE HERE. LET'S GET OUT.

1105. FINE, HONEY. WHAT TIME'S DINNER?

1106. WE HAVING RICE AGAIN?

1107. WE CAN'T PULL IT UP, BECAUSE WE'VE GOT TO LEAVE OSAKA.

1108. IF WE GO NOW, WE'LL LOSE IT.

1109. AFTER ALL THE RISKS I'VE TAKEN.

1110. I'M LEAVING. LET'S GO TO KOBE.

1111. - IT'LL BE SAFE THERE. - YEAH.

1112. NO. I'M NOT GOING UNTIL WE'VE BROUGHT THAT OPAL UP HERE.

1113. THIS CONFUSION'S JUST WHAT WE NEED.

1114. NOBODY'LL NOTICE.

1115. - NOT NOW. - FOOL. WE'VE GOT TO.

1116. NO, WE'LL HAVE TO GIVE IT UP FOR A LITTLE WHILE.

1117. I CAN'T GIVE IT UP.

1118. I'VE KILLED TWO MEN.

1119. - HUH? - OH?

1120. - ONODERA. ONODERA. - WE CAN'T WAIT LONGER.

1121. ONODERA, WHAT WAS THAT YOU SAID?

1122. TELL ME. YOU SAID THAT YOU KILLED TWO MEN.

1123. UH, OH, THAT FIGURE OF SPEECH.

1124. METAPHOR. HA. TEASING.

1125. YOU KILLED THEM BOTH?

1126. WELL, NOT AT THE SAME TIME.

1127. I ONLY MEANT THEY'VE GIVEN THEIR LIVES FOR THIS.

1128. - LIAR. - PANTS ON FIRE.

1129. SO THAT YOU'D HAVE THE OPAL TO YOURSELF.

1130. OF COURSE NOT.

1131. MAYBE I DID.

1132. YOU KILLED THEM.

1133. IN COLD BLOOD.

1134. NO. NO.

1135. TINY TIM, NO!

1136. OH, WHATEVER YOU DO,

1137. DON'T HIT THE INFLATABLE REINDEER. PLEASE!

1138. HENRY, THE BOYS ARE AT IT AGAIN.

1139. OH.

1140. YOU KILLED HIM. YOU KILLED MY BROTHER!

1141. YOU DIRTY RAT.

1142. STOP IT. STOP IT.

1143. YOU'RE KILLING HIM.

1144. SHOULDN'T ONE OF THEM KNOW KUNG FU?

1145. - NOT ENOUGH ROOM. - AH.

1146. THAT'S IT. OUT YOU PIXIES GO.

1147. THROUGH THE DOOR. OUT THE WINDOW.

1148. YOU'RE KILLING HIM!

1149. HEY, SHE'S GOT MONEY ON YOU. DON'T LOSE.

1150. NO! PLEASE!

1151. HEY.

1152. DON'T WORRY. SHE'S A STUNT MOM.

1153. OOH. OH.

1154. OW.

1155. OH, GREAT. FINISH HIM OFF WITH A BOWLING LOCKER.

1156. OH, THAT HAD TO HURT. WITH HIS BAD BACK?

1157. ALL RESIDENTS MUST EVACUATE OSAKA AT ONCE.

1158. DO NOT DELAY.

1159. RAFFLE TICKETS?

1160. ONODERA. SAVE ME.

1161. GET ME OUT OF HERE.

1162. AND GO FOR THE WALLET.

1163. MM-HMM.

1164. SAVE ME!

1165. LET'S SEE. PICK SIX...

1166. THANKS FOR A LOVELY DINNER.

1167. AREN'T YOU GLAD YOU USED DIAL?

1168. DON'T YOU WISH EVERYONE DID?

1169. WHEW.

1170. LET'S GET OUT!

1171. A DEAD CAT IN THERE.

1172. NICE WOOD GRAIN.

1173. REALLY NICE.

1174. SHE'S WEARING A GARTER.

1175. OH. VERY STYLISH SHOT, REALLY.

1176. AW, JOEL, CAN I HAVE A PUPPY LIKE THAT?

1177. PLEASE?

1178. YOU KNOW, HE'D BE PERFECT FOR RING TOSS.

1179. LOOK AT THE BEAK ON HIM.

1180. YOU FOLKS GOTTA EXCUSE ME.

1181. I'M NOT USED TO THIS CITY.

1182. HOT CHILD IN THE CITY.

1183. RUNNIN' WILD. LOOKIN' PRETTY.

1184. HEY, WHERE ARE ALL THE NICK GILDER JOKES?

1185. BOY, LET ME TELL YOU.

1186. WHILE I ROAM FREE. GO FIGURE.

1187. YOU KNOW, I MISS MY HOT WHEELS SET.

1188. BYE.

1189. TOYLAND. TOYLAND.

1190. I CAN'T BELIEVE I'M STILL IN TOYLAND.

1191. A WORLD OF WHIMSY.

1192. OH, LOOK AT HIM GO.

1193. GOOD THING HE'S SPORTING TEFLON, HUH?

1194. HOW ABOUT A TONGUE SANDWICH, TOKYO?

1195. YOU KNOW, YOU DON'T SEE THAT A LOT IN NATURE.

1196. NO.

1197. IT'S ALL CHRISTMASY!

1198. FROSTED MINI TANKS, GANG.

1199. ROSEBUD.

1200. HIS TANK WAS CALLED ROSEBUD.

1201. DID YOU KNOW THAT?

1202. RUINED IT.

1203. IS IMMEDIATELY DESTROYED.

1204. HI, FOLKS. HOW'S THE SHOWER, LADY?

1205. IT'S 10:00. DO YOU KNOW WHERE YOUR KIDS ARE?

1206. I ATE 'EM! HA, I LOVE THAT.

1207. SUFFERS FROM FREEZER BURN.

1208. OOH.

1209. LITTLE NIP IN THE AIR.

1210. - REALLY. - HUH?

1211. WE'RE HAVING.

1212. IT'S A MARSHMALLOW WORLD.

1213. IT'S PRETTY!

1214. A FROZEN PAGODA TREAT.

1215. HUH?

1216. AH, SHOW ME SOMETHING I HAVEN'T SEEN.

1217. YOU KNOW, I SAW A WIRE. THAT WRECKS THE WHOLE THING.

1218. - YOU MEAN THIS IS FAKE? - YEAH.

1219. OH, FOR CRYING OUT LOUD.

1220. HOW ABOUT A LITTLE TONGUE, SCARECROW?

1221. LET'S SEE. THAT'S CALLED FRENCH COMBAT, ISN'T IT?

1222. OH!

1223. ABORT MISSION.

1224. UH, WE'RE TAKING ORDERS. WHO WANTS A BEAR CLAW?

1225. OH, I'M NOT IN THIS SCENE.

1226. WAIT A MINUTE. MAO IS A TOASTMASTER?

1227. EVERYTHING WITH ITS TONGUE.

1228. WITHOUT LAUGHING.

1229. WEAPONS ARE USELESS.

1230. - WELL THEN. - LET'S NOT SEND YOUR MEN.

1231. NEXT ATTACK ON IT FROM SOME DISTANCE.

1232. WILL THAT BE SAFE ENOUGH?

1233. POSSIBLY. WE DO HAVE ONE SITE THAT'S OUT OF HIS RANGE.

1234. RIGHT HERE. WHERE WE HAVE OUR MISSILE CORPS STATIONED.

1235. HEY, THAT'S IRELAND.

1236. IT'LL BE TOO FAR AWAY.

1237. THE MONSTER'S TONGUE CANNOT POSSIBLY REACH IT.

1238. IT'S ONLY A MILE LONG.

1239. WHOA.

1240. ESTES PARK, COLORADO, MEET THE STINGER, BIG BERTHA,

1241. THE GREMLIN.

1242. HE'S DREAMING OF BIG, MUTATED-ARMOR-COVERED RABBITS.

1243. ALL RIGHT.

1244. WHOA. HAS THAT GUY BEEN NEAR RADIATION?

1245. HAVING HOT FLASHES.

1246. COMPLETED PREPARATION, SIR.

1247. - H!

1248. HELLO ACE AWARDS, YOU TWO.

1249. FOR ORDERS, SIR.

1250. RIGHT. BEGIN THE ATTACK.

1251. - MORNING. - OH, GOOD MORNING.

1252. - HI, EVERYBODY. - AH, GOOD MORNING.

1253. UGH.

1254. MORNING. THIS IS BARUGON.

1255. STARTING OUR BROADCAST DAY.

1256. WAIT A MINUTE. SOMETHING'S ROTTEN IN OSAKA NOW.

1257. BREATH OF THE MILLENNIUM.

1258. WONDER IF THEY'LL CALL OFF SCHOOL TODAY.

1259. IT'S THE ROCKETTES.

1260. WHOO!

1261. LEGS UP, GIRLS.

1262. WHAT? A SPINE IN TECHNICOLOR SPECTRUM RAY?

1263. AH, IT'S A SKITTLES COMMERCIAL.

1264. OH, YEAH. FROM HELL.

1265. OH, I'M SURE HE COULD DO THAT.

1266. HOW DO HE KNOW?

1267. BING.

1268. HMM.

1269. WELL. THAT WENT WELL.

1270. GAMERA'S ATTRACTED BY ANY FORM OF HEAT ENERGY.

1271. AND I'M ATTRACTED TO BEA ARTHUR. GO FIGURE.

1272. SO GAMERA'S FLYING TOWARD IT OVER OSAKA.

1273. HEY.

1274. OOH.

1275. OOH.

1276. HE'S BECOMING A STARBURST FRUIT CHEW BEFORE MY EYES.

1277. OH.

1278. GAMERA'S MELTING

1279. HIGH ABOVE THE CHIMNEY TOPS.

1280. UH, SIR, IT'S NOT AN ESCALATOR.

1281. - WHOA! - AAH!

1282. RIGHT IN THE EARS.

1283. AGAINST BARUGON'S RAINBOW.

1284. AND HERE WE END THE 9:00 P.M. NEWS BULLETIN.

1285. WHAT, DO YOU THEY GOT RADIOS IN THEIR KIDS' HEADS?

1286. - WHAT? - ... AS THEY HAPPEN.

1287. IN THE MEANTIME, SOME MUSIC BY YANNI.

1288. YOU KNOW, IT'S UNSETTLING, BUT BEAUTIFUL.

1289. QUIETLY DISTURBING.

1290. TO BE HOLD UP WITH...

1291. NO, YOU CAN'T PLAY YOUR ACCORDION.

1292. STUCK HERE LIKE A BUNCH OF ANIMALS.

1293. HUH? WHY ARE THEY

1294. LITTLE MONSTER, HUH?

1295. WHY?

1296. WHY DON'T YOU SHUT UP?

1297. YOU MAKE ME SICK.

1298. OH, NOT REALLY.

1299. OH, REVEREND MOON'S HOLDING A PRAYER AND SHARE.

1300. TO THE COLD.

1301. BY THIS NEW MONSTER.

1302. NAMED CLARENCE BIRDSEYE.

1303. IS UNHARMED,

1304. ARE WITHOUT THE MEANS...

1305. MY GOD. IT'S BARUGON.

1306. BARUGON?

1307. IT IS.

1308. ANOTHER MONSTER,

1309. BUT IT'S MY BARUGON.

1310. ATTENTION PLEASE. ATTENTION PLEASE.

1311. OH, GOD, COULD HE KISS.

1312. AIRLINES FLIGHT AB-711...

1313. KAREN.

1314. SAN FRANCISCO, SEATTLE,

1315. IS ABOUT TO LEAVE.

1316. WILL PLEASE PROCEED...

1317. KAREN, WHAT'S WRONG? ARE YOU ILL?

1318. I'M CARRYING BARUGON'S CHILD.

1319. THEY'VE COME TOO LATE.

1320. I JUST COULDN'T BELIEVE THAT YOUR STORY WAS TRUE.

1321. I'M RESPONSIBLE FOR BRINGING THIS.

1322. AAH!

1323. DON'T DO THAT.

1324. AS SOON AS IT'S POSSIBLE TO GET THERE.

1325. TO GET RID OF IT?

1326. YES, I DO.

1327. I'VE GOT THE ANSWER HERE.

1328. LET'S HURRY TO STOP ALL THIS HORROR.

1329. OKAY. I'M WITH YOU.

1330. WHOA.

1331. HEY!

1332. GEE, LAY OFF FOR A MINUTE, WOULD YA?

1333. CRYING OUT LOUD.

1334. OH, THAT'S A BRIDGE OVER TROUBLED MODELS.

1335. THAT'S CUTE.

1336. OH, AND I CAN'T EVEN GET THIS OPEN. D'OH!

1337. HEY, LOUIE, YOU STILL OKAY IN THERE?

1338. YEAH, I'M OKAY.

1339. - HUH? - YOU.

1340. ONODERA.

1341. OH, IT'S WITH THE THING, AND THE...

1342. BUT IT'S A GOOD THING.

1343. ASSASSIN.

1344. LOOK AT THAT LOBE.

1345. MAN, AS LEOPOLD TOO.

1346. WE'LL BE ABLE TO FIND THE OPAL.

1347. YOU FOOL. IT WASN'T A JEWEL.

1348. - WHAT'S THAT? - IT WAS A MONSTER'S EGG.

1349. DON'T BE RIDICULOUS.

1350. GOOD ONE.

1351. THE MONSTER HATCHED!

1352. IT'S OUR FAULT.

1353. THIS DESTRUCTION HERE.

1354. WE'RE GOING TO KILL THAT MONSTER BEFORE IT'S TOO LATE.

1355. DON'T GIVE ME THAT STORY.

1356. NO, HERE'S ONE. TWO CHINAMEN WALK INTO A BAR.

1357. HA.

1358. I'VE JUST COME FROM MY BROTHER'S.

1359. ARE BOTH DEAD.

1360. THEIR HOUSE BURNED.

1361. JUST BEFORE THE FIRE. YOU!

1362. HEY, I WAS IN AUSTRIA DURING THE WHOLE THING.

1363. HONEST.

1364. NOT MY FAULT.

1365. YOU LIAR!

1366. PANTS ON FIRE.

1367. OH, THAT'S GOOD. HIT HIM WITH WICKER.

1368. NOT THE JOHNNIE WALKER!

1369. HEY, UH, HONEY, YOU CAN JUMP HERE ANY TIME.

1370. JUMP IN. COME ON.

1371. THANK YOU. FINALLY.

1372. THERE WE GO.

1373. UH-OH. GINSU 2000.

1374. AND STILL DISEMBOWELS.

1375. YEAH. FEEL LIKE I'M WATCHING MANNIX.

1376. DUN, DUN, DUN, DUN.

1377. YOU'D THINK THEY'D BE ABLE TO USE KUNG FU OR SOMETHING.

1378. YEAH. WHERE'S BRUCE LEE WHEN YOU NEED HIM?

1379. SUCKER PUNCH.

1380. OW.

1381. OW.

1382. AH, YOU'RE LUCKY MY CHICK'S HERE, MAN.

1383. THAT'S IT. DON'T TRY TO UNDERSTAND HIM.

1384. AND BRAND HIM.

1385. NOW, WHEN I LEFT

1386. I HAD A SHORT ROPE, A LONG ROPE,

1387. AND A MEDIUM-SIZED ROPE.

1388. NOW, I DON'T KNOW ANY TRICKS—

1389. SORRY. SORRY.

1390. THERE FOR A SEC?

1391. TIME ON THAT? TIME PLEASE?

1392. OH, HE'S BEEN SHOOTING UP.

1393. HUH?

1394. WHAT IN THE WORLD?

1395. HOLD ON HERE.

1396. HEY.

1397. WAIT A MIN...

1398. THIS IS ONE WEIRD SCENE.

1399. UGH.

1400. UH, YOU GOT A LITTLE, UH...

1401. AH, FORGET IT.

1402. YOU ARE ONE SPOOKY CHICK.

1403. DO YOU MIND IF I DON'T CALL YOU AGAIN? UGH.

1404. HE'S JUST HER TYPE TOO.

1405. "A" POSITIVE, THAT IS.

1406. YOU KNOW YOU'RE BEAUTIFUL WHEN YOU'RE BLOODY.

1407. I'M ALL RIGHT. LET'S GO.

1408. HEY. PLEASE HELP ME.

1409. LET'S GO. LET'S GO.

1410. HEY. WAIT.

1411. I—I APOLOGIZE.

1412. HELP ME.

1413. I'M TRYING TO SAY I'M SORRY.

1414. POOR GUY.

1415. SO...

1416. HEY, HER HAIR GOT SHORTER.

1417. MAY I TELL YOU SOMETHING, IF YOU PLEASE?

1418. - NO. - YES, GO AHEAD.

1419. I SUCKED HIS BLOOD, AND I LIKED IT.

1420. BARUGON IS A LAND ANIMAL.

1421. ONCE IN THE WATER, HIS CELLS MELT.

1422. FLOWS OUT QUICKLY.

1423. HAVE PASSED DOWN TO US.

1424. - HIS STRENGTH GOES RAPIDLY. - HMM.

1425. AND THEREFORE HARMLESS,

1426. AND DESTROY HIM THEN.

1427. HMM, LIKE THE WICKED WITCH, EH?

1428. HE'LL DROWN HIMSELF.

1429. IT'S THE ANSWER.

1430. AND HOW DO WE LURE HIM?

1431. WITH THIS.

1432. - HMM. - DOVE BARS?

1433. OH.

1434. JET TRAFFIC.

1435. SAY...

1436. FOR MANY GENERATIONS.

1437. GOT TO DO WITH BARUGON?

1438. AH, KEEP YOUR SHIRT ON. IT'S CUBIC ZIRCONIA.

1439. THIS'LL DRAW HIM ON IRRESISTIBLY.

1440. WE CAN USE IT TO LURE HIM INTO THE WATER?

1441. DIAMONDS THIS SIZE?

1442. SIMMER DOWN, YOU GOLD DIGGER. GEE.

1443. JUST THIS ONE IS LEFT.

1444. IS BORN IN MY VILLAGE.

1445. THAT'S A LONG GESTATION PERIOD.

1446. EACH TIME ONE IS BORN,

1447. MUST BE SACRIFICED.

1448. TO ITS DEATH.

1449. IF THAT'S THE CASE,

1450. THIS LAST DIAMOND IS.

1451. AS THE LEGEND HAS PREDICTED?

1452. IF YOU DON'T BELIEVE IN IT,

1453. YOU ARE DOUBTING THE GODS.

1454. WHOA. GUESS I STEPPED ON A FEW TOES THERE.

1455. SORRY.

1456. WE HAVEN'T TIME TO WASTE.

1457. IT'S THE ONLY IDEA THAT HASN'T BEEN TRIED.

1458. OH, WHAT ABOUT THE "Z" PLAN?

1459. WE'LL PUT IT TO WORK AT ONCE.

1460. SORRY.

1461. SHALL WE GUIDE YOU?

1462. TO SINK HIM IN?

1463. THERE'S BIWA LAKE.

1464. I CAN'T UNTIE IT.

1465. WELL, CUT IT WITH THAT KNIFE. THERE.

1466. GEISHAS WHO LOVE TOO MUCH.

1467. HURRY.

1468. OH, THE ROPE, NOT MY WRIST.

1469. CAREFUL.

1470. THE SAFEST PLACE TO DEPOSIT HIM.

1471. THAT THE 5.000 KARAT DIAMOND...

1472. THAT'S IT. TALK IT OVER WITH JACK DANIELS.

1473. WOW. WHAT AN INCREDIBLE SCHEME.

1474. A 5.000 KARAT DIAMOND,

1475. TO BE SUNK IN BIWA LAKE, JUST TO GET THE MONSTER.

1476. WHAT?

1477. ARE YOU SURE?

1478. OF COURSE. A NATIVE GIRL BROUGHT IT TO JAPAN.

1479. WHO TOLD YOU?

1480. THE RADIO ANNOUNCED IT.

1481. WAS SHE IN BRIDE OF FRANKENSTEIN?

1482. DID HAVE A JEWEL.

1483. THAN I'D EVER DREAMED OF.

1484. BUT DADDY NEEDS HIS MEDICINE.

1485. AH.

1486. LAST CALL.

1487. ALL RIGHT. SO I'LL GET IT.

1488. WANT A DROOL BUCKET? OH, RIGHT ON ME.

1489. TO RID JAPAN OF BARUGON,

1490. IS PUT INTO EFFECT.

1491. THEY OFFERED HIM A COCKTAIL.

1492. A 5.000 KARAT DIAMOND

1493. HIS NATURAL ENVIRONMENT, LAND,

1494. FOR THE WATERS OF LAKE BIWA.

1495. SCENIC LAKE BIWA.

1496. YEAH, RIGHT. I'M HEADING OFF TO A LAKE?

1497. I WAS BORN YESTERDAY?

1498. OH, WAIT. I WAS.

1499. TRAFFIC ON THE I-94 OUTBOUND

1500. DURING THE SUNDOWN SLOWDOWN.

1501. WANT IT.

1502. BARUGON, ARE YOU UP TO ONE OF YOUR LITTLE SCHEMES AGAIN,

1503. YOU LITTLE CONNIVER?

1504. GET ME. I'M CAROL CHANNING.

1505. NO, HE'S CUTER THAN CAROL CHANNING.

1506. OH.

1507. YOU KNOW, DON'T YOU THINK A DISCO BALL

1508. A LITTLE CHEAPER?

1509. MM-HMM.

1510. OH, LOOK. THERE'S LIZ TAYLOR.

1511. NO, HE'S SMALLER THAN LIZ TAYLOR.

1512. COME ON. BE NICE.

1513. OH, FUN.

1514. WHAT'S WRONG?

1515. AND SHAKING IT.

1516. I THINK HE'S GOING FOR IT.

1517. TRY JERK BAIT.

1518. I—I GOTTA GO WALKIES.

1519. UGH.

1520. NO USE. HE WON'T FOLLOW.

1521. WE'VE FAILED.

1522. HERE'S ONE FOR YOU.

1523. WHY DID I CROSS THE ROAD?

1524. THERE'S NO RIGHT ANSWER. I DON'T EVEN KNOW.

1525. NOW WHAT?

1526. WE SMELL ONE.

1527. SHAME, SHAME, ALL AROUND.

1528. I DON'T UNDERSTAND.

1529. OVERPASS? I DON'T THINK SO.

1530. - IS REALLY TRUE... - AND I DOUBT IT.

1531. HE DISREGARDED THE DIAMOND.

1532. HE DIDN'T LIKE THE CUT, THE CLARITY,

1533. THE COLOR, OR KARAT.

1534. THAT I HEARD HER SPEAK.

1535. HAVE LISTENED TO HER.

1536. AW, JEEZ, HEAP MORE SHAME ON HER.

1537. BESIDES, I DOUBT VERY MUCH THAT THERE WAS A REAL DIAMOND.

1538. EXISTED ANYWHERE IN THE WORLD,

1539. THERE'D BE REPORTS OF IT.

1540. SO IT FAILED. BUT IT ISN'T HER FAULT.

1541. TO GIVE YOU HER HELP.

1542. - LISTEN. - YOU'RE JUST TRYING TO LAY ALL THE BLAME ON US.

1543. YEAH, AND SCARECROW'S BRAIN!

1544. UPON US IN THE FIRST PLACE.

1545. YOU GOT ME.

1546. BUT STILL. WE TRIED TO HELP.

1547. BE QUIET!

1548. AND GO TO YOUR ROOM.

1549. I ACTED SHAMEFULLY, I KNOW.

1550. SHE'S BLAMELESS.

1551. SHE GAVE YOU ONE POSSIBLE PLAN.

1552. IT'S JUST BEEN A FOOLISH WASTE OF PRECIOUS TIME.

1553. I KNOW, BUT IT ISN'T HER FAULT.

1554. DIE! DIE! DIE!

1555. I'M SORRY. FORGIVE ME.

1556. HAVE BEEN MOVED...

1557. I HAVE TO GO NOW.

1558. GENERAL'S ROOM, YOU KNOW.

1559. HE HURTS ME SO.

1560. THERE, THERE, DEAR.

1561. LET'S GET YOU A PINT OF FRESH TYPE "A."

1562. HMM?

1563. OH, GET A ROOM.

1564. MM-HMM.

1565. I'LL REPEAT THAT MESSAGE...

1566. UH, I HATE TO PULL RANK ON YOU, SON,

1567. BUT, UH, HMM.

1568. IN FACT, WE'RE VERY MUCH OBLIGED TO YOU.

1569. YOU TRIED YOUR BEST.

1570. SHE IS A WILD TIGRESS, ISN'T SHE?

1571. EXCUSE ME. THIS GENTLEMAN IS DR. SATO.

1572. HELLO.

1573. AH. HOW ARE YOU?

1574. - FINE, THANKS. - GOOD.

1575. YOU?

1576. THIS TIME YOU'VE GOT SOME REAL TROUBLE.

1577. OH, WE CERTAINLY HAVE.

1578. THINK YOU CAN HELP US?

1579. SUGGESTIONS TO MAKE?

1580. I'M GLAD I STOPPED BY. ON MY WAY OVER HERE...

1581. WHILE STILL AN EGG.

1582. A FLOWER GROWS.

1583. YOU SEE,

1584. HERE TO JAPAN.

1585. ONODERA. HE WAS THE MAN WHO FOUND THE EGG,

1586. THINKING IT WAS A GEM.

1587. FOR ATHLETE'S FOOT.

1588. WHAT'S SO ABSORBING, JUNIOR?

1589. TO TURN THE LAMP OFF.

1590. TOWARDS THE EGG.

1591. HEY, LOOK BACK THERE.

1592. IT'S CARY GRANT IN THE FABERGE YEARS.

1593. AT VERY CLOSE RANGE,

1594. PERIOD OF TIME.

1595. CASTRO'S THERE TOO.

1596. SPEEDED UP CONSIDERABLY THE GROWTH OF THE MONSTER.

1597. THEN THAT EXPLAINS IT.

1598. WHAT'S HAPPENED.

1599. TO REACH HIS PRESENT SIZE.

1600. AH, INDEED.

1601. TAKE TEN YEARS TO MATURE?

1602. YES. I AM.

1603. WITH AN ABNORMAL BODY.

1604. I KNOW THE FEELING.

1605. THAT'S SOMETHING WE DOCTORS CAN EXPLAIN.

1606. IS EXPOSED TO RADIOACTIVITY,

1607. A FREAK MAY BE BORN.

1608. LIKE RICK JAMES?

1609. SO THEN THAT'S WHY IT SHOWED NO INTEREST IN THE DIAMOND.

1610. THAT'S RIGHT.

1611. HE'S A SUPER FREAK.

1612. LISTEN. NOW THAT WE KNOW THAT IT'S A FREAK,

1613. ISN'T THERE SOME DIFFERENT WAY THAT WE SHOULD ATTACK IT?

1614. IT'S HERBIE!

1615. TO THE INFRARED RAY.

1616. WILL THAT DO US ANY GOOD?

1617. NO, BUT IT WILL PAD THE FILM OUT A LITTLE BIT.

1618. BARUGON MUST THEREFORE RESPOND FAVORABLY TO IT.

1619. YEAH, I'M BUYING THIS BIG TIME.

1620. NOW THEN. PERHAPS THE DIAMOND, IF RADIOACTIVE,

1621. WILL BE EFFECTIVE.

1622. AS YOU FIRST HOPED.

1623. BARUGON, THAT'S ME.

1624. KAREN, IS THERE ANY WAY TO MAKE HIM STAY WHERE HE IS NOW?

1625. UH, WE COULD STAPLE HIM TO THE FLOOR.

1626. THERE'S ONE POSSIBILITY.

1627. BEEN PRAYING FOR RAIN.

1628. IF HEAVEN CARES, IT WILL SEND US RAIN.

1629. WHY RAIN?

1630. YOU GOT A BETTER IDEA?

1631. WATER WILL WEAKEN HIM.

1632. CANNOT MOVE WHILE IT RAINS.

1633. SHE KIDDIN' US?

1634. BUT WHY WAIT FOR THE GODS.

1635. ISN'T IT EASY NOW TO CREATE RAIN?

1636. HECK, MY AUNT COULD DO IT.

1637. WE'LL PRODUCE IT, ALL RIGHT.

1638. YOU DIRECT.

1639. FROM HELICOPTERS.

1640. IS SENT TO FLY OVER BARUGON...

1641. SPRAYING ONTO HIM MANMADE RAIN.

1642. A MIST-LIKE LIQUID, WHICH IT IS HOPED,

1643. THE MONSTER'S MOVEMENTS.

1644. SEND IN THE CLOUDS.

1645. HIS FREEZING VAPOR,

1646. THUS RENDERING HIM HARMLESS.

1647. HEAVY MACHINERY.

1648. WELL, COULD BE WORSE.

1649. HOW?

1650. COULD BE RAININ'.

1651. WHOA.

1652. CATCH THE DROPS ON YOUR TONGUE. IT'S FUN.

1653. YOU KNOW, UH, RAINY DAYS AND MONDAYS ALWAYS GET ME DOWN.

1654. IT'S TRUE.

1655. POPPIES. POPPIES WILL MAKE HIM SLEEP.

1656. WELL, LET'S HEAD OVER TO THE BOZO DRUM!

1657. HOO-HOO!

1658. A DEATH RAY PROJECTOR,

1659. TO ACT UPON THE LIGHT MOLECULES.

1660. ARE BROKEN DOWN.

1661. - RIGHT NOW... - OH, JUST GET ON WITH IT.

1662. IS IN THE EXPERIMENTAL STAGE,

1663. TO PRACTICAL USE.

1664. - INSTEAD OF THE RUBY. - NEAT.

1665. - LET'S INSERT IT. - TOGETHER.

1666. AND TRY ITS EFFECTIVENESS.

1667. YOU'RE TRYING MY EFFECTIVENESS.

1668. WE'RE ANXIOUS TO TRY IT OUT AT ONCE.

1669. AND SEE IF IT WORKS.

1670. OKAY.

1671. HE'S SLEEPING. SOMEBODY PUT HIS HAND IN WARM WATER.

1672. DARN POACHERS.

1673. WELL, THERE GOES OUR RIDE.

1674. HI.

1675. WHY, BARUGON, YOU'RE CRYING.

1676. FAKE. I'M JUST RESTING MY EYES.

1677. OH, LOOK AT HIM. HE'S ALL OVER THE ROAD.

1678. OH, NO. OH, AND HERE COMES

1679. ON A SUNDAY RIDE.

1680. UM, HONEY, THERE'S SOMETHING IN THE ROAD AHEAD.

1681. WHAT IS THIS, THE UNIVERSAL TOUR?

1682. BEGIN.

1683. THE BEGUINE.

1684. OOH.

1685. RIGHT. MOVE FORWARD.

1686. A SPOOKY LITTLE GIRL LIKE HER.

1687. MM-HMM.

1688. HMM?

1689. OH, COMPANY. MY FAVORITE SNACK.

1690. KAREN, GOT IT?

1691. SHE NEVER LOST IT.

1692. AH, BE CAREFUL.

1693. AND COMES OUT HERE.

1694. WHOA. LOOK, HE'S LEAKING.

1695. NO, HE'S JUST DIESELING.

1696. OH.

1697. PREPARATIONS READY, SIR.

1698. GOOD. START.

1699. OH. BEGIN.

1700. WE'LL START.

1701. - GET GOING. - ENGAGE.

1702. - MAKE IT SO. - NOW.

1703. - FIRE. - INITIATE.

1704. - GO. - TIME TO GET IT MOVING.

1705. WHATEVER HAPPENED TO GAMERA?

1706. YOU KNOW, HE GOT TOP BILLING.

1707. AGENT, I THINK.

1708. I SUPPOSE SO.

1709. NOW...

1710. HE'S MOVING! IT'S MOVING!

1711. HEY!

1712. GOOD. DRIVE ON.

1713. THERE'S THAT GLOWING GUY AGAIN.

1714. INTO THE SPOTLIGHT,

1715. WE'RE EXPECTING HIM TO DO A COUPLE JAZZY SHOW TUNES.

1716. SPOTLIGHT DANCE. BARUGON.

1717. DOING THE DOG.

1718. GOOD.

1719. WELL SAID.

1720. AH, YOU KNOW, I WAS SINGING FOR THE PEOPLE.

1721. THEY WERE CRAWLING AT ME.

1722. THEY WERE THROWING...

1723. SHE'S GOT THE FLARE-NOSTRIL LOOK I LOVE SO MUCH.

1724. OH, NOW WATCH.

1725. HE'LL HAVE BLACK RINGS

1726. THE BINOCULARS DOWN.

1727. COME ON, HERE IT GOES.

1728. HERE IT GOES—AW.

1729. OH, NO!

1730. WHAT'S WRONG?

1731. EVERYTHING. WE GOTTA LENGTHEN THE MOVIE.

1732. I'M SO EMBARRASSED.

1733. RUFF. RUFF.

1734. LET'S GET OUT OF HERE!

1735. RIGHT!

1736. WON'T START, HUH?

1737. MOMMY!

1738. MOMMY, MOMMY, IT'S YOUR BOY!

1739. OH, NO. HE'S DOING JOLSON.

1740. TURN OUT THE LIGHT. QUICKLY.

1741. OKAY.

1742. HEY.

1743. HEY, GUESS YOU SAW IT.

1744. RIGHT.

1745. NOW I'LL DO EARTHA KITT.

1746. DON'T GO TOO CLOSE. BE CAREFUL.

1747. IT'S GOING TO BE DANGEROUS.

1748. NO.

1749. NOW. SWITCH ON.

1750. FOR ACTION!

1751. AND NOW I'D LIKE TO TELL A FEW THINGS ABOUT SHOW BUSINESS...

1752. ON BROADWAY.

1753. RIGHT. BOARD NOW.

1754. YES, SIR.

1755. ORDERS CAME DOWN.

1756. - DON'T SAY IT. - RIGHT.

1757. COMES TO ME,

1758. AND HE SAYS THAT...

1759. COMMENCE PROGRESS, NOW!

1760. TO THE LAKE!

1761. YAY, WE'RE ALL GOING TO THE LAKE!

1762. YAY! WHOOPEE!

1763. BRING THE INFLATABLE DOG.

1764. I'M NOT GOING IN THE TUNNEL.

1765. WELL, I'M SURE NOT GOING TO LOSE THAT DIAMOND.

1766. TIME TO BLOW.

1767. NO, DON'T GO. YOU CAN'T TAKE SUCH A RISK.

1768. LET GO OF ME AND STAY OUT OF MY CAR.

1769. PLEASE DON'T GO. COME BACK HERE.

1770. GET AWAY!

1771. NO, DON'T GO. DON'T GO!

1772. OH, HEY, CROW,

1773. IN THE COOLER THERE?

1774. UH, NO. HOW ABOUT A FROZEN DAIQUIRI CONVECTION?

1775. OH, SURE. THAT SOUNDS GREAT.

1776. BOY, IT SURE IS A NICE DAY TODAY, HMM?

1777. YEAH, LIKE A WARM SUMMER NIGHT BACK HOME.

1778. YOU KNOW, BACK ON EARTH

1779. AT THE BEACH ALL THE TIME.

1780. OR ELSE WE'D GO TO THE DRIVE-IN, WHICH WAS REALLY FUN.

1781. THE DRIVE-IN?

1782. OH, YEAH.

1783. WE'D ALL PILE INTO THE CAR

1784. ON ROUTE FIVE.

1785. OH. JOEL, TELL US ABOUT THE MOVIES AGAIN, HMM?

1786. WELL, MY LITTLE CINEMATIC SIDEKICKS,

1787. YOU KNOW, IN THOSE DAYS, WE HAD REAL STARS.

1788. WE DIDN'T NEED DIALOGUE. WE HAD FACES.

1789. OH, KINDA LIKE THIS GAMERA FILM, HUH, JOEL?

1790. OH, YEAH, BUT THAT'S—

1791. HAD A LOT OF FACES.

1792. I'LL GIVE YOU THAT FOR FREE.

1793. TO HAVE ANY BIG-NAME STARS.

1794. WELL, THAT'S WHERE YOU AND I SPLIT THE DOG,

1795. MY LITTLE RED PAL.

1796. UH, THIS FILM IS PACKED WITH CELLULOID HEROES,

1797. FEEL ANY PAIN.

1798. HUH.

1799. IN HOLLYWOOD.

1800. TO APPEAR IN A GAMERA FILM.

1801. HERE, I'LL SHOW YOU. CAMBOT, DO IT LIKE I LIKE IT.

1802. SEE, CHECK IT OUT. THERE'S EDWARD G. ROBINSON,

1803. IN SOYLENT GREEN.

1804. YOUR SOYLENT GREEN, SEE.

1805. IS MADE FROM PEOPLE.

1806. YEAH, WHATEVER. HERE'S ELVIS COSTELLO MAKING HIS SCREEN DEBUT.

1807. I DON'T KNOW. LOOKS MORE LIKE MARSHALL CRENSHAW TO ME.

1808. OR ARNOLD STANG.

1809. OH, YEAH, LOOK. HERE'S PETER USTINOV.

1810. HEY, IT LOOKS "USTINOV" LIKE HIM TO ME.

1811. UH, YEAH. AND HERE WE HAVE LON CHANEY, JR.

1812. UH, RIGHT. SURE, JOEL. THAT'S—

1813. HEY, LET ME FINISH. NEXT WE HAVE STEVE ALLEN.

1814. AND HARRISON FORD.

1815. ODDJOB AND WILLEM DAFOE,

1816. AND WILLEM DAFOE.

1817. UH, JOEL, ARE YOU OKAY?

1818. HEY, SHUT UP. HANK WILLIAMS, JR.

1819. AND WILLEM DAFOE.

1820. UH, JOEL, WHEN YOU WENT TO THE DRIVE-IN,

1821. OF TIME TO THE TRUNK?

1822. JERRY TO YOU BOTS?

1823. PROBABLY DON'T KNOW HIM

1824. OR CRACKING UP,

1825. BUT, OH, LADY MISTER HEEMINY HOMEN,

1826. WHAT IN THE HEY? OH...

1827. PLEASE HELP ME. UH...

1828. UH, FOLKS, WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK.

1829. SORRY YOU HAD TO SEE THIS.

1830. OH, BOY.

1831. UGH.

1832. THINK I GOT A SUNBURN.

1833. TOLD YOU THERE'S A LOT OF STARS IN THIS MOVIE.

1834. NEAT.

1835. CAREFUL, ROBIN.

1836. AT ALL TIMES.

1837. IT'S YOU. WHY ARE YOU HERE?

1838. - I'M GETTING THAT DIAMOND. - FIGURES.

1839. HASN'T YOUR GREED CAUSED ENOUGH GRIEF ALREADY?

1840. WHY DON'T YOU GET OUT OF HERE?

1841. OH, BOY. YOU KNOW, GUYS,

1842. I'M STARTING TO DOUBT THEIR FRIENDSHIP.

1843. AAH!

1844. CRYING OUT LOUD.

1845. HUMANS. WHO CAN UNDERSTAND 'EM?

1846. GO FIGURE.

1847. WHAT'S GOING ON?

1848. HEY, SERGEANT, GO AND CHECK.

1849. - DOCTOR. DOCTOR. - GIVE ME THE NEWS.

1850. TO GET AT THAT DIAMOND.

1851. NO, YOU HAVEN'T.

1852. DANCE. DANCE. THE LAMBADA.

1853. - THE FORBIDDEN DANCE? - YEAH.

1854. OR ELSE I'LL SHOOT.

1855. - HI. - OH, THERE.

1856. AH, WAIT, WAIT. I DON'T HAVE MY SKIS UP.

1857. AAH!

1858. UH-OH.

1859. OH, THAT'S GIVING HIM THE RASPBERRY.

1860. HELP ME! I'VE BEEN FRENCHED TO DEATH!

1861. I CALL THAT A MANWICH.

1862. UNTIL HE GETS TO OSAKA.

1863. NOW YOU CAN'T GO BACK

1864. FOR ANOTHER HOUR. REMEMBER THAT.

1865. WHY ARE THEY SO SAD?

1866. THAT'S THE GUY THAT KILLED HIS BROTHER.

1867. WELL, THERE'S SOMETHING GET TONGUED TO DEATH.

1868. WELL, THAT'S THE WAY I WANT TO GO. WHOO!

1869. WELL, THAT'S IT. WE'RE LICKED.

1870. SORRY. SORRY! SORRY.

1871. THAT'S WHAT YOU GET.

1872. MOM, MOM, WATCH ME DIVE!

1873. THROW ME A STICK. I'LL CATCH IT.

1874. THE PLAN HAS FAILED.

1875. THE MASSIVE DIAMOND.

1876. IS THAT HE'LL PASS IT.

1877. HAS NOW BEEN...

1878. O.A.K.

1879. - GET THE HELICOPTERS. - SIR.

1880. SO BARUGON CAN'T MOVE.

1881. - THERE IS NO OTHER WAY. - SIR.

1882. I LOVE THE THEATER. I DO.

1883. MEANWHILE, AT A STORAGE UNIT OUTSIDE OF OSAKA...

1884. HMM?

1885. WHAT ARE THEY, AT A COLUMBO TRYOUT?

1886. IT'S USELESS LOOKING AROUND HERE.

1887. WE WON'T FIND A THING.

1888. YEAH, THE AUDIENCE HAS LEFT TOO.

1889. EVER SINCE I WAS A CHILD,

1890. I'VE BEEN TOLD

1891. THAT THE MONSTER CAN MAKE.

1892. OH, WHAT'S SHE GOING ON ABOUT?

1893. ONLY AFTER EACH THOUSAND YEARS,

1894. WITH MY OWN EYES.

1895. THE LAST TIME.

1896. TERRIFYING IT WAS.

1897. MM-HMM.

1898. OH, SORRY. I DIDN'T KNOW.

1899. I'M SORRY. I WASN'T LISTENING.

1900. DID YOU SAY SOMETHING?

1901. TO GET RID OF IT NOW.

1902. IT'S OUR PUNISHMENT FOR WANTING SO MUCH WEALTH.

1903. SO WHAT'S GONNA HAPPEN TO DONALD TRUMP?

1904. YES. YES, SHE'S BUYING IT.

1905. I COULD WORK UP A TEAR.

1906. OH. SHE'S GOING FOR IT.

1907. WAIT A MINUTE. A NAPKIN?

1908. THAT GIVES ME AN IDEA.

1909. HONEY, YOU'RE BRILLIANT.

1910. UGH.

1911. HMM?

1912. NOW, WHAT ARE THESE?

1913. SNAP ZOOMS.

1914. REARVIEW MIRRORS.

1915. THEY'RE ALL THAT'S LEFT OF THE JEEP.

1916. RHETORICAL?

1917. ALONG WITH EVERYTHING ELSE.

1918. THEY APPEAR TO BE IMPERVIOUS.

1919. NEAT.

1920. SEE WHAT THAT MEANS?

1921. THERE'S A WEAKNESS IN THE RAINBOW.

1922. AND THERE'S MORE OF US!

1923. OH. OH.

1924. NOW, DOCTOR,

1925. ISN'T THE RAINBOW SIMILAR TO A DEATH RAY PROJECTOR?

1926. WELL, IT'S KIND OF A REACH, BUT MAYBE.

1927. I BELIEVE THAT'S RIGHT.

1928. YES!

1929. - SEEMS LOGICAL. - SURE.

1930. HIT THE MIRROR,

1931. IN JUST THE WAY LIGHT IS.

1932. IT WASN'T HARMED.

1933. DIDN'T PENETRATE IT.

1934. - AH, I SEE. - YES.

1935. - REFLECTED. - KILL HIM. OH.

1936. THE PRINCIPAL ITSELF'S REALLY A SIMPLE-ENOUGH ONE.

1937. HMM.

1938. SOMETHING IMPORTANT.

1939. BUT WILL THIS HELP US?

1940. CAN WE USE IT AGAINST BARUGON?

1941. NO, BUT IT'S SOMETHING TO DO.

1942. YES, SIR.

1943. I'M AN AMATEUR IN THESE MATTERS,

1944. BUT I HAVE AN IDEA.

1945. HMM?

1946. HERE, NOW HOLD OUT YOUR ARM.

1947. AN EXTREMELY INTENSE HEAT.

1948. THEY CAN EVEN MELT STEEL.

1949. AND YET, THE STOVE ITSELF

1950. BY ALL THIS HEAT.

1951. NOW WHY?

1952. - HO! - AAH!

1953. DON'T... JEEZ.

1954. OUTWARDS AWAY FROM IT.

1955. BUT IF THEY'RE TURNED IN,

1956. ONTO THE BURNER ITSELF, WHAT WOULD HAPPEN THEN?

1957. OH, GREAT. WE'RE TAKING A SHOP COURSE ALL OF A SUDDEN.

1958. NOW I'M, UH, GONNA MAKE A BIRD HOUSE FOR YOU FOLKS.

1959. - SO YOU SEE? - I MADE A FLUTE.

1960. BY ITS OWN FLAME. WHEN EXPOSED TO IT.

1961. MM-HMM.

1962. IN THE SAME WAY, BARUGON CAN BE DESTROYED.

1963. UH, COME AGAIN?

1964. FOR THE TEST?

1965. WHAT DO YOU THINK, SIR?

1966. YOU'RE TOASTED, AREN'T YOU?

1967. THAT'S QUITE AN IDEA.

1968. BUT SURELY IT'S IMPOSSIBLE TO APPLY IT HERE.

1969. ON BARUGON.

1970. WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SUPPORT ME?

1971. THESE MIRRORS.

1972. WE'LL MAKE A MIRROR LARGE ENOUGH

1973. ONTO HIM.

1974. SO, IN THEORY,

1975. BY HIS OWN RAINBOW.

1976. YEAH, IF THAT MAKES IT WORK FOR YOU. OF COURSE.

1977. HMM.

1978. - HOW VERY FITTING. - IRONIC. I LOVE IT.

1979. ALL RIGHT. PLEASE GET READY TO CARRY IT OUT.

1980. GET YOUR COSTUMES ON.

1981. AT THE SUMMIT OF MT. KASHIKA

1982. IS TURNED INTO A MIRROR,

1983. OPERATION REARVIEW MIRROR.

1984. IS DEPLOYED.

1985. ARE EMPLOYED,

1986. WITH A MERCURY PREPARATION.

1987. BY THE GOVERNMENT.

1988. NOT TO SMUDGE THE MIRRORS.

1989. AT THE SAME TIME,

1990. TO KEEP BARUGON IN ONE SPOT.

1991. IS PLAYED FOR HIM.

1992. HAVE BEEN COMPLETED.

1993. AGAINST BARUGON.

1994. BARUGON WILL BE ANGERED.

1995. AND MAYBE A LITTLE PUT-OUT.

1996. - THE RAINBOW. - OF FORGIVENESS.

1997. LEFT BY 300 DEGREES.

1998. 300 "DEGWEES"?

1999. LEFT BY 300 DEGREES.

2000. "WOGER."

2001. OH.

2002. DOWN 28 DEGREES, FIVE SECONDS.

2003. DOWN 28 DEGREES, FIVE SECONDS.

2004. IN THAT THING.

2005. STOP. CORRECT RANGE.

2006. "COWWECTING" RANGE, SIR.

2007. 35, SIR.

2008. RIGHT!

2009. WE'RE READY NOW. EVERYTHING'S IN PLACE TO BEGIN.

2010. DOCTOR. WON'T IT BE BETTER

2011. WHEN WE CAN SEE THE RAINBOW?

2012. I AGREE. WE'LL WAIT.

2013. YOU KNOW,

2014. HAS EVER TALKED TO ME LIKE THAT. I LIKE IT.

2015. I LOVE IT SO.

2016. OH. GRAND CANYON SUITE.

2017. THERE'S NO ONE UP THERE.

2018. NO WORKMEN OR OTHERS.

2019. OH, NO. EVERYTHING

2020. IS DONE BY REMOTE CONTROL.

2021. I LIKE YOUR SHIRT. IT'S KIND OF DRAPEY.

2022. FIRE!

2023. WHAT NOW? I WAS POSING FOR CRYING OUT LOUD.

2024. UH, WHAT WAS THAT ABOUT REPOSITIONING THE TANKS?

2025. TOO LATE.

2026. CAN'T RUN FROM THE RAINBOW.

2027. - MM-MM. - MM-MM.

2028. FROSTED LUCKY CHARMS.

2029. OH.

2030. AH, THAT'S A CHEAP SHOT.

2031. OOH. CAN YOU IMAGINE HOW THAT MUST SMELL?

2032. - UGH. - YEESH.

2033. AH, YOU KNOW WHAT REALLY BURNS MY BUTT? ME.

2034. THAT'S CUTE.

2035. OH. OH, HOT. OH, HOT.

2036. OH, WATER. WATER. OOH.

2037. AAH.

2038. OOH.

2039. BARUGON'S DEAD.

2040. AND GARSON'S GOT HIM!

2041. I THINK SO.

2042. UH-HUH.

2043. HE'S DEAD. YOU'VE KILLED HIM.

2044. I'M FAKING.

2045. SHH.

2046. OH, THIS IS GONNA BE JUST LIKE FATAL ATTRACTION.

2047. I KNOW IT.

2048. OH, WHAT, IS DAVID LYNCH DIRECTING NOW?

2049. SMUCKER'S GRAPE JELLY.

2050. UGH.

2051. OH. WE JUST GAVE HIM A RASH.

2052. WE FAILED. THE RAYS WEREN'T POWERFUL ENOUGH FOR IT.

2053. WE'VE GOT TO TRY AGAIN?

2054. - HUH? - HUH?

2055. YEAH, YOU'VE GOT A DRAGON.

2056. WE MUST AROUSE HIM.

2057. HEY, I LISTENED TO THE DIAMOND THING,

2058. BUT I AM NOT GOING TO AROUSE HIM.

2059. BARUGON WON'T SEND OUT ANOTHER RAINBOW.

2060. BUT WHY NOT? WHY NOT, KAREN?

2061. I'VE GROWN UP IN THE JUNGLE.

2062. AND I'VE LIVED AMONGST THE WILD ANIMALS.

2063. SO?

2064. SO I KNOW ABOUT THEIR WAYS.

2065. HURT BY ITS OWN MISTAKE,

2066. THE SAME MISTAKE AGAIN.

2067. NOT LIKE US.

2068. WHAT SHE SAYS IS RIGHT.

2069. SEND ANOTHER RAINBOW.

2070. EVERYTHING'S IN THE TOILET.

2071. IS AT AN END.

2072. SO LET'S GO EAT. WHO'S HUNGRY?

2073. YOU BUYIN'?

2074. OH, NO. THERE'S NOTHING WE CAN DO.

2075. THAT'S THE SPIRIT.

2076. NOTHING.

2077. AH, SHUT UP, YOU PATHETIC BASTARD.

2078. GET UP! QUIT YOUR CRYING.

2079. AH, YOU'RE NOTHING BUT A GAL DARN COWARD.

2080. TO SLAP HIM WITH.

2081. BUT NOW, THE BUILDINGS

2082. HAVE BEGUN TO THAW.

2083. FROM OSAKA CASTLE.

2084. CONSCIOUSNESS.

2085. AND HIS PILOT HAS RE-LIT.

2086. AH.

2087. HEY, ARE THOSE LEE PRESS-ON NAILS?

2088. FINALLY, A FIGHT.

2089. DEATH BITE ON THE NECK?

2090. WHEE.

2091. HEY, BITE THIS.

2092. YOU MEAN LIKE THIS?

2093. I AM WIRED.

2094. HE IS, TOO.

2095. HEY, HEY, HEY, YOU KIDS.

2096. NO SPLASHING. COME ON.

2097. HEY, THIS WATER GOT WARM ALL OF A SUDDEN.

2098. MARION, DON'T LOOK AT THE LIGHT, MARION.

2099. LOOK AWAY.

2100. IN RUBBER SUITS, IT'S REAL SAD.

2101. YEAH.

2102. RUB MY TUMMY. RUB MY TUMMY.

2103. CAME A BUBBLIN' CRUDE.

2104. BILE, THAT IS.

2105. TEXAS TEA.

2106. OH, NO. I DON'T WANNA GET MY HAIR WET.

2107. OOH.

2108. OH, LOOK. HE'S IN THE WATER.

2109. MM.

2110. I'M HERE, STEVE.

2111. IT JUST MAY SUCCEED.

2112. IT'S A CRAZY IDEA,

2113. BUT IT JUST... MIGHT... WORK.

2114. OH, THAT'S...

2115. HE'S DROWNING IN IS OWN GRAVY.

2116. UGH.

2117. HEY, THAT FLUORIDE TREATMENT

2118. SHOWS HE'S REALLY NEEDING TO FLOSS.

2119. BY THIS TIME, MY LUNGS WERE ACHING FOR AIR.

2120. YOU CAN EVER DO THAT.

2121. DON'T HIT. OR YELL.

2122. HURTS, HUH? WE DIE TOGETHER, MY FRIEND.

2123. COME ON NOW. FIGHT.

2124. YOU'VE NEVER GIVEN UP ON ANYTHING IN YOUR LIFE.

2125. NOW FIGHT!

2126. HEY, IT'S THE...

2127. WENT OUT ON BARUGON.

2128. OH, NO. SHE SAID HE WOULDN'T DO ANOTHER RAINBOW.

2129. HEY, IT'S STOPPING NOW.

2130. BARUGON'S FINISHED.

2131. HE'S COMPLETELY DEFEATED.

2132. FEEL SO EMPTY?

2133. BARUGON'S FINISHED!

2134. VICTORY...

2135. OH, GIVE HER A KISS, YOU BIG LUG.

2136. COME ON.

2137. LITTLE SUGAR ON THE JAW.

2138. - HE'S FINISHED. - LET'S GO HOME.

2139. YOU KNOW, SHOULDN'T THEY KILL GAMERA

2140. GOT HIM RIGHT THERE?

2141. NOT A BAD IDEA.

2142. I DON'T KNOW. CALL ME PRUDENT.

2143. YOU KNOW, AFTER THE THRILL IS GONE,

2144. WE'RE LEFT

2145. WAS ALL WE EVER HAD.

2146. WAS A DISASTER.

2147. YEP. UH-HUH.

2148. ALL THAT WAY, JUST TO BRING BACK ANGUISH.

2149. TO HELP WHEN YOU FOUND OUT.

2150. THEN YOU'LL HAVE ME?

2151. IT WAS YOU WHO GAVE UNSELFISH HELP.

2152. YEP, YOU'RE RIGHT. IT WAS ME.

2153. I'VE LEARNED

2154. DIRECT OUR ACTIONS.

2155. YEAH, BUT LET'S PICK OUT MY RING FIRST.

2156. KAREN, I'LL TAKE YOU HOME.

2157. BACK TO YOUR PEACEFUL VILLAGE.

2158. WILL YOU?

2159. RIGHT NOW.

2160. IS ITS OWN REWARD.

2161. MY BROTHER'S DEAD.

2162. GOSH, YOUR HAND IS CLAMMY.

2163. I COULD NEVER LOVE YOU.

2164. DON'T MAKE ME LAUGH.

2165. YOU'RE NOT ALONE.

2166. AW.

2167. HEY, THERE'S, LIKE, EIGHT HANDS DOWN THERE.

2168. HEY, GET YOUR HANDS OUT OF THERE.

2169. YOU'RE SQUEEZING TOO HARD.

2170. YOUR GRIP...

2171. TO OUR FRIENDS.

2172. BACK TO THE OCEAN. THE SOURCE OF ALL CREDITS.

2173. "SUPPORT YOUR LOCAL SHERIFF."

2174. NOBODY KNOWS WHY.

2175. OH, SANDY FRANK.

2176. I DON'T THINK I'VE SEEN HIS NAME BEFORE.

2177. GOODNIGHT, EVERYONE. ENJOY THE BUFFET.

2178. WE SHOULD GET OUT OF HERE. COME ON.

2179. I'M GONNA STICK AROUND.

2180. HOW THIS TURNS OUT.

2181. OH, WE SHOULD GO.

2182. IT'S JUST WATER CROW.

2183. A LITTLE BIT LONGER, OKAY?

2184. MUCHO AGUA.

2185. CROW, IF YOU STAY IN TOO LONG, YOU'LL GET WRINKLY, DEAR.

2186. COME ON. COME ON.

2187. WHAA!

2188. AH, GEE, JOEL, THAT WASN'T MUCH OF A GAMERA MOVIE.

2189. YEAH, I MEAN, GAMERA WAS HARDLY IN THE MOVIE AT ALL,

2190. YET HE GETS TOP BILLING.

2191. WHY'S THAT, HMM?

2192. WELL, YOU SEE, UH, IN THIS FILM,

2193. MORE TIME BEHIND THE CAMERA.

2194. OH.

2195. SEE, YEAH, AND THAT'S HOW IT ALL WORKED OUT.

2196. YOU SEE, IN HOLLYWOOD,

2197. A PERFORMER, DIRECTOR, AND MONSTER.

2198. OH, KINDA LIKE BARBARA STREISAND.

2199. YEAH, EXACTLY.

2200. YOU KNOW, YOU'LL READ ABOUT

2201. IN THIS NEW BOOK, YOU'LL NEVER EAT THIS TOWN FOR LUNCH AGAIN!

2202. SEE, IT'S ALL IN THERE.

2203. THAT'S REALLY INTERESTING.

2204. YOU KNOW, WHEN IT COMES ABOUT MONSTER MOVIES,

2205. I'D LIKE TO READ MORE ABOUT IT.

2206. EXACTLY, TOM.

2207. OF WHIMSY AND ENCHANTMENT,

2208. GRADES THREE TO FIVE.

2209. OH, I WANNA READ THAT ONE.

2210. SIDE OF MONSTER MOVIES.

2211. THAT'S REALLY NEAT.

2212. THE NEXT ONE LOOKS GOOD TOO.

2213. TO EAT JAPANESE.

2214. OOH, HOW ABOUT THAT?

2215. WITHOUT REALLY TRYING.

2216. YEAH, NEXT ONE, JAPANESE MUTANT TELLS ALL.

2217. MOVE YOUR HAND.

2218. AND THIS ONE'S GREAT FOR KIDS,

2219. WHERE'S BARUGON BOOKS.

2220. DELIGHTFUL.

2221. YOU KNOW, THERE'S A LOT OF GREAT

2222. ABOUT MONSTERS.

2223. ABOUT TO ASK ABOUT THOSE.

2224. THIS ONE'S THE VELVETEEN TURTLE READ BY MERYL STREEP.

2225. LET'S LISTEN TO THAT ONE, CAMBOT.

2226. SAID TO THE LITTLE TOY SOLDIER,

2227. "YOU'RE NOT LIKE THE OTHER TOYS, ARE YOU?

2228. "YOU'RE DIFFERENT.

2229. "THAT IS WHY I AM GOING TO KILL YOU.

2230. WHY? BECAUSE YOU ARE GOING TO DIE."

2231. - YEAH. - THAT'S DELIGHTFUL. VERY TOUCHING.

2232. AND THEN THERE'S A MEMOIR,

2233. AS READ BY BARUGON.

2234. LET'S HEAR THAT ONE, CAMBOT.

2235. HEY, WHAT ARE THESE BOOKS, JOEL?

2236. LESS THAN ZERO, I AM NOT SPOCK,

2237. BY WILLIAM SHATNER.

2238. OH, THESE ARE—

2239. TONIGHT ON EMERGENCY 911.

2240. OVER THERE.

2241. WHY DON'T WE, UH, READ A LETTER, GUYS?

2242. OH, WHY NOT? THAT SOUNDS GOOD TO ME.

2243. UH, LET'S PUT THAT ON STILL STORE THERE.

2244. ANYWAY,

2245. OF NAPERVILLE, ILLINOIS.

2246. JOE, UH, WRITES, "DEAR JOEL AND GANG ON MST,

2247. "I REALLY LIKE YOUR SHOW.

2248. "MY FAVORITE PEOPLE ARE CROW,

2249. TOM SERVO, GYPSY, CAMBOT, AND YOU."

2250. THAT'S JUST ABOUT ALL OF US, ISN'T IT?

2251. "I DON'T LIKE YOUR BOSSES TOO MUCH."

2252. WE DON'T EITHER.

2253. "FRANK IS KIND OF A CRYBABY,

2254. "AND DR. FORRESTER YELLS AT FRANK TOO MUCH.

2255. "I'M 12-YEARS-OLD AND WATCH YOUR SHOW ALL THE TIME.

2256. "I LOVE THE INVENTION EXCHANGE.

2257. "Y'ALL MAKE TERRIFIC INVENTIONS.

2258. MORE OF YOUR SHOW."

2259. LET'S PUT THAT UP ON THE SCREEN.

2260. TELL 'EM WHERE THEY CAN WRITE, TOM.

2261. INFORMATION CLUB...

2262. DO IT TODAY.

2263. WHAT DO YOU THINK, SIRS?

2264. BOOKS, BUBBIE.

2265. THIS WEEKEND.

2266. UH, WHAT DID YOU GET, FRANK?

2267. OH, YOU'RE GONNA LOVE IT. THIS IS GREAT.

2268. IT'S THE STAND BY STEPHEN KING.

2269. THIS IS THE NEW UNCUT VERSION,

2270. FROM THE RESTORED VERSION.

2271. IT'S REALLY GREAT. YOU'RE GONNA REALLY ENJOY THAT.

2272. OH, THANK YOU, FRANK.

2273. PUSH THE BUTTON, FRANK.