¡Mucha Lucha! 1x1

Directed by

Garry Chalk as El Heystack Grande (voice)

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Subtitle languages: English • Spanish • Brazilian Portuguese

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1. A true Luchador knows, the only thing to fear is fear itself.

2. Oh, and bullies.

3. Grrr.

4. Uh!

5. Ah!

6. You, Rikochet!

7. You're a disgrace, turn off this alarm!

8. Sleeping is for wimps. A masked wrestler never sleeps.

9. Get up!

10. It's lucha time!

11. Lucharan!

12. boom

13. crash

14. Uno, dos, tres!

15. 'Rikochet, get moving.'

16. 'Mi joven isn't going to be late'

17. 'for his first day of school like last year.'

18. Nice moves, chico, but, ugh—

19. Gonna be a lucha day.

20. Remember the code, mi hijo.

21. Honor, family, tradition!

22. A doughnut!

23. Que pasa, Rikochet? Long time no see.

24. Flea, how many times have I told you to stay outta my garbage?

25. Now, come on, we're gonna be late for school.

26. 'Nine hundred ninety-eight, nine hundred ninety-nine.'

27. One thousand.

28. You two almost missed the bus.

29. If I didn't believe in upholding the honor of our friendship.

30. If we weren't the three Mascaritas

31. I woulda so got on that bus without you guys.

32. 'This is the first day of the new school year.'

33. 'I refuse to live in the ignominy of tardiness.'

34. 'Now, get on the bus!'

35. ding ding

36. boing boing boing

37. Hurry! The door's closing.

38. - That was close. - Not for me.

39. I like danger, living on the edge.

40. Racing in the fast lane.

41. I.. Uh!

42. Ay mi..

43. Watch it, this is my school.

44. And it's not just any school.

45. It's the foremost world renowned

46. 'International School of Lucha!'

47. Like I told the miasmic morador

48. in our marathon Machu Picchu match.

49. It's three faults and you're out!

50. This is your first fault.

51. Now, off you go to class. Bye-bye.

52. Okay, I want a good clean rope guard.

53. No biting, no kicking, no gum chewing.

54. - Rikochet. - Lucharan!

55. - 'The Flea.' - You got The Flea.

56. - 'Buena Girl.' - It's all buena.

57. - 'Cindy Slam.' - Grr.

58. - 'El Loco Mosquito.' - Bzzz.

59. - 'Potato Potata Junior.' - Yo, wassup, yo.

60. 'French Twist.'

61. - 'Sonic Sumo.' - Hey!

62. - 'Francisco of the Forest.' - Ahh!

63. 'Zero Kelvin.'

64. 'Penny Plutonium. Double Ninja Ninja.'

65. Masked Dog. Masked Dog?

66. Hey! Masked Dog, it's cool.

67. Class, this is a very big year for you here

68. at the almost world renowned International school of Lucha!

69. I want you to go to your corners and cover learning!

70. There's might work, a signature massacre, and most importantly..

71. '... how to find your own signature move.'

72. - Hey! That's my lunch. - Yeah? Well, it's in my mouth!

73. So, it's important that you.. Huh?

74. You! Rikochet, you broke my stick.

75. - But-but-but— - Technical foul.

76. Bad language. To the head mistresses' office, now!

77. You're out of here!

78. 'Next!'

79. gulp

80. 'Next!'

81. 'Next!'

82. I captured that one from the masked muchacho

83. in a tidal bar in Baja.

84. When I was finished with him

85. he couldn't ride a burro for a month.

86. Minor pleasantry.

87. I warned you, cabrito.

88. This is your second fault.

89. I'm going to have to throw the book at you.

90. "The Code Of Masked Wrestling?"

91. Yes! "The Code Of Masked Wrestling."

92. 'It is the very foundation of this school.'

93. Each student follows every rule in that book.

94. And do you know why?

95. Because otherwise you'd scare the tights off 'em?

96. Yes.

97. That and... masked wrestling is not a sport.

98. It is not mere entertainment.

99. It is a way of life.

100. It is honor, family, tradition.

101. - And doughnuts. - Do not interrupt.

102. Take the code. Learn it, love it, live it.

103. Make yourself worthy.

104. Oh, and you've already had two faults.

105. If I see you making trouble one more time

106. you are out of this school for good.

107. - Got it? - Yes, ma'am.

108. I mean, your headmistressness.

109. Uh, no problema.

110. Come on, show me what you did over your summer vacation

111. or you will be benched.

112. Let's go, already.

113. Time! You, Rikochet, take your seat.

114. Um, Potato Potata Jr.?

115. Your left butt cheek is in my seat.

116. I know. It's comfy.

117. But it's my seat.

118. Yeah? Well, it's got my rear end in it.

119. - You feeling okay, Rikochet? - That's a disgrace!

120. A true masked wrestler would never take that!

121. His hiney has blatantly disgraced

122. your family and your family's family

123. and your family's family's family's—

124. You feeling okay, Rikochet?

125. My jovencito son is true, my jovencito is strong.

126. My behind, your seat. My behind, your seat.

127. Three faults and you're out.

128. You're a disgrace. A disgrace!

129. Honor, family, tradition.

130. Doughnut!

131. You're wrong! You're wrong! You're wrong!

132. Nothing says I love you like flowers.

133. Lucharan!

134. One potato, two potato, three potato, four!

135. Lucharan!

136. Spinning top.

137. boom

138. - Wow! - Whoa!

139. - Oh. - Argh!

140. No! Uh. Oh.

141. Tap out. Tap out!

142. Okay, okay. I do. I do!

143. smush

144. Flea, was that cream doughnut really the lucha thing to do?

145. Yes, it was, baby.

146. Uh, headmistress, I can explain.

147. No, I can't.

148. You see, the truth is I was only trying to defend

149. the honor of my lunch.

150. My desk, my family.

151. I did it because..

152. because I am a true masked wrestler

153. and I'm proud of masked wrestling!

154. And I heard a bunch of voices that told me to do it.

155. I only have one thing to say!

156. Good job. Well done, Rikochet.

157. I am wiping your slate clean. You are in the clear.

158. Keep it that way!

159. Here, Rikochet. Have a doughnut, champ.

160. Oh, yeah. Thanks, Flea.

161. Say, Flea, where'd you get these doughnuts anyway?

162. Uh, The Flea borrowed them off a desk a few doors down.

163. 'Where are my doughnuts?'

164. A true Luchador knows that size does not matter.

165. Weight does!

166. Ready, Rikochet?

167. A Luchador must be prepared for uneven odds.

168. Like three against one!

169. You, El Loco Mosquito, Protozoa, and El Pacifico.

170. I want you to wrestle Rikochet.

171. Uno, dos, get in there!

172. Protoplasm.

173. Fists of Fury!

174. - Hyah! - Ah!

175. Huh?

176. Uh... aachoo!

177. boing

178. boing

179. (all) Ah!

180. Uno, dos, tres. Three down, uno standing!

181. We have a winner!

182. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah!

183. Three against one and I stand tall.

184. Who's the man? Who's the big man?

185. Yeah, you're the big man in your weight class.

186. When you're pickin' on someone your own size.

187. Yeah, you should have the guts

188. to pick on someone bigger than you.

189. - Hmm. - Look out, Rikochet.

190. They're using logic against you.

191. Logic? No! No! No!

192. Anything but that.

193. Logic is the Flea brain pain.

194. clang

195. Okay, that's better.

196. What are you guys trying to say exactly?

197. When you grow a little bit maybe you can do some real

198. professional masked wrestlin'.

199. Yeah, I remember when I had a mask that size.

200. I was still wearin' diapers.

201. Maybe Rikochet's still wearin' diapers.

202. Hey, nobody insults my diapers!

203. Not that I wear diapers, but if I did.

204. I wouldn't let the likes of you insult them.

205. You three aren't so big. I, Rikochet, will wrestle you

206. all three at once!

207. Compadre, the Flea is proud of you

208. for standing up for short guys everywhere.

209. - Stand up! - I am standing.

210. Ooh! The Flea thinks you are so perdido.

211. The Flea is outta here before the Flea gets—

212. Hurt.

213. I, the headmistress, say, nobody move!

214. 'The Flea cannot feel The Flea's legs.'

215. 'Oh, wait, here they are right next to The Flea.'

216. Here at the foremost world renowned

217. International school of Lucha!

218. 'We wrestle by weight class.'

219. I give you my judgment!

220. Rikochet cannot wrestle Potato Potata Jr.

221. Francisco of the Forest and El Haystack Grande

222. in a three against one match.

223. He is not in their collective weight class.

224. However, he can wrestle them

225. if he's the same weight as all three

226. by tomorrow morning! Have a lucha day.

227. The Flea feels better now.

228. I'm gonna do it.

229. I'm gonna put on enough weight

230. to meet and defeat those oversized brutos.

231. Rikochet, you've gotta put on 600 pounds by tomorrow morning.

232. That's so buena!

233. This will be one of the best challenge matches

234. in the history of challenge matches.

235. I think you can do it.

236. Flea, what do you think?

237. The Flea thinks you have a lot of work to do.

238. bam

239. bam bam bam bam

240. thud thud thud thud

241. Hmm, Rikochet, you're only a dishonorable

242. 300 hundred pounds instead of 650.

243. You should be ashamed. All our hard work for nada.

244. Wait, The Flea has the answer!

245. 'The Flea's parents are having an all you can eat buffet'

246. 'at The Flea's family restaurant.'

247. Rikochet can eat the Flea's family

248. out of house and home.

249. 'Prepare to meet your destiny.'

250. Too much. I don't know.

251. Luchador has gotta know his limitation.

252. If you quit now, you'll be a disgrace!

253. It's lucha time!

254. I mean, it's luncha time!

255. That food is mocking you.

256. 'Ooh, big strong Rikochet afraid of a little steamed donut'

257. 'in oyster sauce and cocoa.'

258. The food's insulting me.

259. You're sweet and sour pork is going down!

260. Argh!

261. Aghh!

262. And, now, for the ultimate in buena eats

263. 'It contains everything a mass wrestler needs.'

264. 'Meat, chicken, pork'

265. 'bacon, mayonnaise, butter, 18 different cheeses'

266. 'beef, eggs, MasMontonya's special sauce'

267. 'beef byproducts, butter, butter, butter, more eggs.'

268. 'seven different lunch meats'

269. 'jelly beef juice and extra bacon.'

270. boom

271. thud thud thud

272. I'm ready to face those three big brutos. I'm looking large.

273. I'm walking tall, I'm... gonna..

274. fall!

275. thud

276. 'The Flea cannot feel his a-a-arms.

277. Oh, wait, here they are.'

278. Flea, those are my arms.

279. thud thud thud

280. Sorry, sorry 'bout that.

281. Hey, guy, comin' through. Sorry.

282. Almost there. Just a few more..

283. Ooh. Oh, that squishy, creamy filling.

284. Maybe I'll have just a little treat before the big match.

285. Wha..

286. Hand over the Mr. Squishy Sponge Cakes and nobody gets hurt.

287. Wants my sponge cakes, does he?

288. Well, no dice!

289. 'Bring it on, big boy.'

290. Lucharan!

291. Ha! Grrr.

292. boom

293. Mm, creamy.

294. No, no!

295. All I ever wanted to do was deliver

296. Mr. Squishy Sponge Cakes.

297. And, damn end, like this.

298. I guess it's kinda fitting.

299. crash

300. No, Rikochet, don't do it!

301. Put down the Spongy Man.

302. Please.

303. bam

304. Oh, that was close. Huh?

305. thud thud

306. Rikochet!

307. That's right, it's me and you don't stand a chance.

308. I am the greatest, I am the biggest.

309. I am the man!

310. And you're gonna pay for your insults!

311. Wow, that weight's really gone to Rikochet's head.

312. And his thighs.

313. thud

314. Lucharan!

315. - Three against one! - 'Hold it!'

316. Nobody move!

317. To the scales!

318. 'Whoa!'

319. You, Rikochet! You're too big to wrestle them.

320. You're in a weight class of your own!

321. Maybe the El Mas Montonya's mega torta, was a sandwich too far.

322. Oh, it's okay, we didn't really want to wrestle Rikochet.

323. He's cool.

324. Like the new look, Rikochet. Yo.

325. Okay, I guess I'll go get back to my normal weight class.

326. Whoa-a-a-a!

327. 'The Flea cannot feel his brain!'

328. 'Oh, wait, here it is.'

329. Right next to the Flea.

330. Mucha Lucha!