1. MORNING, SIR,
CAN I HELP YOU?Copy !req
2. OH, YES, I WONDERED
IF YOU HAVECopy !req
3. ANY PART-TIME VACANCIES
ON YOUR BOOKS.Copy !req
4. PART-TIME, I'LL
HAVE A LOOK, SIR.Copy !req
5. SEE WE'VE GOT,
UH... AH, YES.Copy !req
6. SIR WALTER RALEIGH
IS EQUIPPINGCopy !req
7. ANOTHER EXPEDITION
TO VIRGINIA.Copy !req
8. HE NEEDS TRADERS
AND SAILORS.Copy !req
9. VITTLERS NEEDEDCopy !req
10. AT THE COURT
OF PHILIP OF SPAIN.Copy !req
11. OH, YEAH,
AND THEY WANTCopy !req
12. MASTER JOINERS
AND CRAFTSMENCopy !req
13. FOR THE BUILDING OF
THE GLOBE THEATER.Copy !req
14. I SEE, HAVEN'T YOU GOT
ANYTHING A BIT MORE MODERN?Copy !req
15. YOU KNOW, LIKE
A JOB ON THE BUSESCopy !req
16. OR DIGGING
THE UNDERGROUND?Copy !req
17. WELL, NO,
WE ONLY HAVE TUDOR JOBS.Copy !req
18. THAT CAN'T BE VERY
PROFITABLE, CAN IT?Copy !req
19. WELL, YOU'D BE SURPRISED,
ACTUALLY, SIR.Copy !req
20. THE TUDOR ECONOMY'S BOOMINGCopy !req
21. EVER SINCE
SIR HUMPHREY GILBERTCopy !req
22. OPENED UP
THE NORTHWEST PASSAGE TO CATHAYCopy !req
23. AND THE CABOTS'
EXPANSION IN CANADACopy !req
24. THERE'S BEEN A TREMENDOUS
SURGE IN EXPORTSCopy !req
25. AND TRADE WITH THE
HOLY ROMAN EMPIRE IS GOING...Copy !req
26. NO, QUITE RIGHT,
IT'S NO GOOD AT ALL.Copy !req
27. WHAT?Copy !req
28. IT'S A DEAD LOSS.Copy !req
29. WE HAVEN'T PUT ANYONE
IN A JOB SINCE 1625.Copy !req
30. I SEE.Copy !req
31. THAT'S ALL?Copy !req
32. WHAT?Copy !req
33. THAT'S ALL YOU SAY?Copy !req
34. YES.Copy !req
35. NO, NO, WE WERE
THE TOPS THEN.Copy !req
36. DRAKE GOT ALL HIS SAILORS HERE.Copy !req
37. ELIZABETH, WE SUPPLIED THE
ARCHBISHOPS FOR HER CORONATION.Copy !req
38. SHAKESPEARE STARTED OFF
FROM HERE AS A TEMP.Copy !req
39. THEN CAME
JAMES ICopy !req
40. AND THE BOTTOM FELL OUT
OF THE TUDOR JOBS.Copy !req
41. 1603... 800 VACANCIES FILLED.Copy !req
42. 1604... 4O.Copy !req
43. 1605... NONE.Copy !req
44. 1606... NONE.Copy !req
45. THE REST OF
THE STUART PERIOD... NOTHING.Copy !req
46. HANOVERIANS... NOTHING.Copy !req
47. VICTORIANS... NOTHING.Copy !req
48. SAXE-COBURGS... NOTHING.Copy !req
49. WINDSORS... WHAT DID YOU WANT?Copy !req
50. DIRTY BOOKS, PLEASE.Copy !req
51. RIGHT.Copy !req
52. SIR, SORRY ABOUT
THE TUDOR BIT.Copy !req
53. BUT YOU CAN'T BE
TOO CAREFUL, YOU KNOW?Copy !req
54. HAVE YOU GOT
ANYTHING A BIT, UH?Copy !req
55. STRONGER? HOLD ON.Copy !req
56. MY LORD OF WARWICK!Copy !req
57. 'ALLO!Copy !req
58. RAISE HIGH
THE DRAWBRIDGE.Copy !req
59. GLOUCESTER'S TROOPS
APPROACH.Copy !req
60. RIGHT!Copy !req
61. CAN'T BE TOO CAREFUL,
YOU KNOW, SIR.Copy !req
62. THERE'S BRIDGET,
QUEEN OF THE WHIP.Copy !req
63. YES...Copy !req
64. OR THERE'S
NAUGHTY NORA.Copy !req
65. NO...Copy !req
66. OR THERE'SCopy !req
67. DOUG, BOB AND GORDON
VISIT THE ARK ROYAL.Copy !req
68. OR THERE'S SISTER TERESA,
THE SPANKING NUN.Copy !req
69. YOU DON'T HAVE
ANYTHING SPECIFICALLYCopy !req
70. ABOUT DEVON
AND CORNWALL?Copy !req
71. NO, I'M AFRAID NOT, SIR.Copy !req
72. THE ONE I WAS
REALLY AFTER WASCopy !req
73. ARTHUR HOTCHKISS'
DEVONSHIRE COUNTRY CHURCHES.Copy !req
74. WELL, HOW ABOUT THIS,
SIR... BUM BITERS?Copy !req
75. NO, NOT REALLY.Copy !req
76. AND I DON'T SUPPOSE YOU'VE GOTCopy !req
77. ANY GENERAL SURVEYS OF
ENGLISH CHURCH ARCHITECTURE?Copy !req
78. IT'S NOT REALLY OUR LINE, SIR.Copy !req
79. NO, I SEE, WELL, NEVER MIND.Copy !req
80. I'LL JUST TAKE THE LORD
LIEUTENANT IN NYLONS THENCopy !req
81. AND I'LL TRADE IN THESE TWO
COPIES OF PIGGIE PARADE.Copy !req
82. RIGHT, SIR.Copy !req
83. MY LORD OF WARWICK!Copy !req
84. 'ALLO?Copy !req
85. RAISE HIGH
THE DRAWBRIDGE.Copy !req
86. GLOUCESTER'S
TROOPS APPROACH!Copy !req
87. RIGHT!Copy !req
88. JUST THESE, THEN.Copy !req
89. ALL RIGHT,
THIS IS A RAID.Copy !req
90. MY NAME IS
SUPERINTENDENT GASKELLCopy !req
91. AND THIS IS
SERGEANT MADDOX.Copy !req
92. SIR PHILLIP SIDNEY,
'TIS GOOD TO SEE THEECopy !req
93. ON THESE SHORES AGAIN.Copy !req
94. SHUT UP.Copy !req
95. YOUR SUIT IS FAIR
AND GOODLY CUT.Copy !req
96. WAS'T FROM ANTWERP?Copy !req
97. SHUT UP. IT'S A DISGUISE.Copy !req
98. RIGHT! CONFISCATE
THE SMUTTY BOOKS, MADDOX.Copy !req
99. SIR PHILLIP, PRITHEE NAY!Copy !req
100. LISTEN, MATECopy !req
101. DON'T COME THAT
PHILLIP SIDNEY BIT WITH ME.Copy !req
102. I'M NOT A BLOODY TUDOR AT ALL.Copy !req
103. I'M GASKELL OF THE VICE SQUAD
AND THIS IS SERGEANT MADDOX.Copy !req
104. MADDOX?Copy !req
105. WHERE'S HE GONE?Copy !req
106. SIR PHILLIP, PRITHEE
REST AWHILE.Copy !req
107. LOOK, THIS IS
THE LAST TIMECopy !req
108. I'M WARNING YOU.Copy !req
109. I'M NOT SIR PHILLIP
BLEEDING SIDNEY.Copy !req
110. I AM SUPERINTENDENT
HAROLD GASKELLCopy !req
111. AND THIS IS A RAID.Copy !req
112. THAT'LL BE
540 QUID, SIR.Copy !req
113. OH, I'LL JUST HAVE
THIS ONE THEN.Copy !req
114. MADDOX!Copy !req
115. LOOK, THIS IS A RAID...Copy !req
116. HONESTLY.Copy !req
117. I PROMISE YOU.Copy !req
118. WHERE ARE YOU GOING?Copy !req
119. I'M GOING HOME.Copy !req
120. RIGHT.Copy !req
121. WELL, I'LL REMEMBER YOU.Copy !req
122. DON'T YOU WORRY,
I'LL REMEMBER YOU.Copy !req
123. PRAY, GOOD
SIR PHILLIP...Copy !req
124. DON'T YOU START.Copy !req
125. MADDOX!Copy !req
126. LISTEN, I CAN PROVE
TO YOU I'M A POLICEMAN.Copy !req
127. I'LL GIVE THE NAMES
OF ALL THE MENCopy !req
128. DOWN IN "F" DIVISION
AT ACTON.Copy !req
129. INSPECTOR ARTHUR PERRYCopy !req
130. SUPERINTENDENT CHARLES
FRODWELL, MY BEST FRIENDCopy !req
131. POLICE DOGS BUTCH,
WOLF, PANTHER, MAUDLING.Copy !req
132. HOW WOULD
I KNOW THOSE NAMESCopy !req
133. IF I WAS
SIR PHILLIP SIDNEY?Copy !req
134. VICAR, VICAR,
YOU KNOW ME.Copy !req
135. THE GARGOYLE CLUB.Copy !req
136. I GOT YOU
OFF THE CHARGE.Copy !req
137. FAREWELL, GOOD
SIR PHILLIP.Copy !req
138. HEY, STOP!Copy !req
139. MADDOX!Copy !req
140. YOU'LL NEVER GET AWAY WITH THIS,
YOU PORN MERCHANT!Copy !req
141. BLIMEY!Copy !req
142. MADDOX?Copy !req
143. MADDOX!Copy !req
144. OH, GOOD SIR, HOW GLAD
I AM TO SEE THEE COME.Copy !req
145. FORGIVE ME WEEPING,
BUT MY LOVE HAS GONE.Copy !req
146. UH, LISTEN,
MY NAME IS GASKELL...Copy !req
147. SUPERINTENDENT GASKELL
OF VICE SQUAD.Copy !req
148. MYSELF AND
SERGEANT MADDOX...Copy !req
149. ARE ON A RAID.Copy !req
150. WE ARE NOT TUDOR PEOPLE.Copy !req
151. WE ARE THE POLICE.Copy !req
152. FRANCES, WHAT IDLENESS IS THIS?Copy !req
153. WHY, GOOD SIR
PHILLIP SIDNEY!Copy !req
154. WHAT HAST THOU HERE?Copy !req
155. YOU ARE SIR
PHILLIP SIDNEY?Copy !req
156. POSSIBLY...Copy !req
157. BUT I MAY BE
SUPERINTENDENT GASKELLCopy !req
158. OF THE VICE SQUAD.Copy !req
159. AH, GOOD, SIR PHILLIPCopy !req
160. THY SHARP-TONGUED WIT
HAS NOT DESERTED THEE.Copy !req
161. COME, LET US
EAT AND DRINK.Copy !req
162. STAY WITH US AWHILE.Copy !req
163. ALL RIGHT, SIR,
I THINK I WILL.Copy !req
164. THEN... THEN DID WE BUST
THE HARRY TONY MOBCopy !req
165. WHO DID SEEK TO IMPORTCopy !req
166. SCANDINAVIAN FILTH
VIA GERMANY.Copy !req
167. FOR SIX YEARS THEY
CLEANED UP A PACKET.Copy !req
168. THE DAY I GOT WHIFF OF THEM
THROUGH A SQUEALERCopy !req
169. DID, WITHIN A WEEK,
A MOP-UP RIGHT GOOD.Copy !req
170. THEY'RE NOW LANGUISHINGCopy !req
171. DOING FIVE YEARS'
BIRD IN PARKHURST.Copy !req
172. SIR PHILLIP!Copy !req
173. THE SPANIARDS
HAVE LANDEDCopy !req
174. IN THE
NETHERLANDS.Copy !req
175. MY LORD WALSINGHAM NEEDS
YOU THERE FORTHWITH.Copy !req
176. LET'S GO.Copy !req
177. GOOD LUCK, SIR PHILLIP!Copy !req
178. FIGHT AGAINST FILTH!Copy !req
179. WHERE ARE
THE SPANIARDS?Copy !req
180. DOWN BELOW, SIR PHILLIP.Copy !req
181. THEIR FIRST BOATS
ARE LANDING EVEN NOW.Copy !req
182. RIGHT, YOU STAY HERE,
I'LL GO AND GET THEM.Copy !req
183. SIR PHILLIP, NOT ALONE!Copy !req
184. 'ALLO, 'ALLO!Copy !req
185. WHAT'S GOING
ON HERE?Copy !req
186. IS NOTHING,
SENOR, IS JUST SOME LITERATURE.Copy !req
187. I KNOW WHAT LITERATURE
IS, YOU DAGO DUSTBIN.Copy !req
188. I ALSO KNOW
WHAT PORN IS.Copy !req
189. WHAT'S THIS THEN, EH?Copy !req
190. IS ONE OF LOPE DE VEGA'S
LATEST PLAYS, SENOR.Copy !req
191. TOLEDO TIT PARADE?Copy !req
192. WHAT KIND OF A PLAY IS THAT?Copy !req
193. IS VERY VISUAL, SENOR.Copy !req
194. RIGHT, I'M TAKING
THIS LOT INCopy !req
195. IN THE NAME OF HER GRACIOUS
MAJESTY QUEEN ELIZABETH.Copy !req
196. OH, BUT SENOR.Copy !req
197. DON'T GIVE ME
ANY TROUBLE.Copy !req
198. JUST PILE UP THESE
BASKETS OF FILTHCopy !req
199. AND COME WITH ME.Copy !req
200. NO!Copy !req
201. THE BATTLE RAGED LONG AND HARDCopy !req
202. BUT AS NIGHT FELL,
SIDNEY OVERCAME THE SPANIARDS.Copy !req
203. 6,000 COPIES OF TITS AND BUMSCopy !req
204. AND 4,000 COPIES OF SHOWER
SHEILA WERE SEIZED THAT DAY.Copy !req
205. THE TIDE OF SPANISH PORN
WAS STEMMED.Copy !req
206. SIR PHILLIP SIDNEY RETURNED
TO LONDON IN TRIUMPH.Copy !req
207. COVERED IN GLORYCopy !req
208. SIR PHILLIP RODE HOME
TO PENSHURSTCopy !req
209. TO SEE HIS BELOVED WIFE.Copy !req
210. BUT ALL WAS NOT WELL.Copy !req
211. GOOD EVENING ALL,
MY LOVE.Copy !req
212. I HAVE RETURNED SAFE
FROM THE LOW COUNTRIES.Copy !req
213. WHAT ART THOU
READING, FAIR ONE?Copy !req
214. OH, IT IS NOTHING,
HUSBAND.Copy !req
215. I CAN SEE 'TIS
SOMETHING.Copy !req
216. UH... 'TIS ONE OF
SHAKESPEARE'S LATEST WORKS.Copy !req
217. OH...Copy !req
218. GAY BOYS IN BONDAGE.Copy !req
219. WHAT, IS'T...
TRAGEDY? COMEDY?Copy !req
220. UH... 'TIS, UH...Copy !req
221. 'TIS A STORY OF A...
A MAN'S GREAT LOVECopy !req
222. FOR HIS... FELLOW MEN.Copy !req
223. HOW FORTUNATE
WE ARE INDEEDCopy !req
224. TO HAVE SUCH A POET
ON THESE SHORES.Copy !req
225. INDEED.Copy !req
226. HOW WAS THE WAR,
MY LORD?Copy !req
227. THE SPANIARDS WERE
DEFEATED THRICE.Copy !req
228. SIX DOZEN CHESTS
OF HARD-CORE CAPTURED.Copy !req
229. HAST BROUGHT HOME
ANY SPOILS OF WAR?Copy !req
230. YES, GOOD MY WIFE.Copy !req
231. THIS FAIR COAT
TRIMMED WITH ERMINE.Copy !req
232. OH, LOVELY.Copy !req
233. NOWT ELSE?Copy !req
234. NO, NO, FAIR LADY,
THE REST WAS TOO SMUTTY.Copy !req
235. NOW, MY GOOD WIFE, WHILE
I REST, READ TO ME A WHILECopy !req
236. FROM SHAKESPEARE'S
GAY BOYS IN BONDAGE.Copy !req
237. UH...Copy !req
238. YES, MY LORD.Copy !req
239. GAY BOYS IN BONDAGE.Copy !req
240. "KEN, 25, IS A MOUNTED POLICEMAN
WITH A DIFFERENCECopy !req
241. "AND, WHAT A DIFFERENCE!Copy !req
242. "EVEN ROGER
IS SURPRISEDCopy !req
243. "AND HE'S...
HE'S USED TO REAL MEN.Copy !req
244. 'TIS LIKE HAMLET.Copy !req
245. WHAT A GENIUS!Copy !req
246. "BUT WHO IS GOING TO DO
THE COOKING TONIGHT?Copy !req
247. RODDY'S GOT A MOUTHFUL..."Copy !req
248. ALL RIGHT!Copy !req
249. THIS IS A RAID.Copy !req
250. OH, WE ARE DISGRACED.Copy !req
251. THERE YOU ARE, MADDOX.Copy !req
252. CUT THE CHAT
AND GET IN THE VAN.Copy !req
253. MADDOX,
YOU RECOGNIZE ME.Copy !req
254. INDEED I DO,
SIR PHILLIP SIDNEYCopy !req
255. AND SAD I AM
TO SEE YOUCopy !req
256. CAUGHT UP IN THIS
MORASS OF FILTH.Copy !req
257. OOH, THAT'S A LONG ONE.Copy !req
258. OH, OH, THE GLORIOUS NAME
OF SIDNEY IS BESMIRCHED.Copy !req
259. ALL IS LOST,
OH, ALAS THE DAY!Copy !req
260. SHUT UP!
I KNOW THIS MAN.Copy !req
261. IT'S ME OLD MATE,
SERGEANT MADDOX.Copy !req
262. YOU'LL DO TIME
FOR THIS.Copy !req
263. OH, MADDOX,
IT'S ME, GASKELL...Copy !req
264. "F" DIVISION
DOWN AT ACTON.Copy !req
265. INSPECTOR
ARTHUR FRODWELL...Copy !req
266. COME ON, SIDNEY.Copy !req
267. AND YOU, MISS.Copy !req
268. I'M NOT SIR PHILLIP
BLEEDING SIDNEY.Copy !req
269. WHERE WERE YOU?Copy !req
270. WE COULD HAVE MOPPED
UP THAT TUDOR SHOP.Copy !req
271. OOH, THAT'S A GOOD ONE.Copy !req
272. IT'S ME,
IT'S GASKELL.Copy !req
273. YES, I'LL EXPLAIN
THIS TO YOUCopy !req
274. WHEN I GET BACK
AT THE STATIONCopy !req
275. THAT YOU'VE GOT
THE WRONG MAN!Copy !req
276. PRITHEE, WHAT IS'T
THAT HERE I HOLD?Copy !req
277. IF IS'T BE BRIAN'S,
THAN TO FIGHT I GO.Copy !req
278. BUT, NO.Copy !req
279. ALAS, IF FORTUNE DOTH
PERCEIVE, I AM UNDONE.Copy !req
280. NO, CYRIL
MUST NOT KNOW.Copy !req
281. BUT NO, YES, NO...
AH, AH, AH, RESOLVED.Copy !req
282. BUT, HARK,
SOMEONE APPROACHING.Copy !req
283. TAKE HEED, MY LORDCopy !req
284. KEVIN AND BRUCE
ARE HERE.Copy !req
285. IT'S SO NICE HERE,
ISN'T IT, DARLING?Copy !req
286. OH, IT'S BEAUTIFUL.Copy !req
287. IT'S... IT'S PARIS
ALL OVER AGAIN.Copy !req
288. EXCUSE ME, DO YOU MIND
IF I JOIN YOU?Copy !req
289. UH... NO, NO,
NOT AT ALL.Copy !req
290. ARE YOU SURE
YOU DON'T MIND?Copy !req
291. UH, YES, YES,
ABSOLUTELY.Copy !req
292. YOU'RE SURE I WON'T
BE DISTURBING YOU?Copy !req
293. NO, NO.Copy !req
294. YOU'RE ABSOLUTELY SURE
I WON'T BE DISTURBING YOU?Copy !req
295. NO, NO, REALLY.Copy !req
296. GOOD, BECAUSE I DON'T
WANT TO DISTURB YOU.Copy !req
297. I'M SORRY?Copy !req
298. I DON'T WANT TO DISTURB YOUCopy !req
299. ESPECIALLY AS
YOU'RE BEING SO KINDCopy !req
300. ABOUT ME
NOT DISTURBING YOU.Copy !req
301. WE DON'T MIND,
DO WE, DARLING?Copy !req
302. NO, NO, DARLING.Copy !req
303. GOOD, SO I CAN GO AHEADCopy !req
304. AND JOIN YOU THEN,
CAN I?Copy !req
305. YES, YES.
YES, PLEASE.Copy !req
306. WON'T BE DISTURBING?Copy !req
307. NO, NO.
NO, NO, NO.Copy !req
308. GOOD, GOOD,
YOU'RE VERY KIND.Copy !req
309. A LOT OF PEOPLE ARE
FAR LESS UNDERSTANDINGCopy !req
310. THAN YOU ARE.Copy !req
311. A LOT OF PEOPLE TAKE OFFENSE
WHILE I EVEN TALK TO THEMCopy !req
312. LET ALONE WHEN
I SPECIFICALLY TELL THEMCopy !req
313. ABOUT MY... BEING DISTURBING.Copy !req
314. WELL, IT'S NOT
PARTICULARLY DISTURBING.Copy !req
315. NO, ABSOLUTELY,
ABSOLUTELY.Copy !req
316. THAT'S WHAT
I ALWAYS SAY.Copy !req
317. BUT YOU'D BE AMAZED...Copy !req
318. YOU'D BE AMAZED
AT THE NUMBER OF PEOPLECopy !req
319. WHO REALLY DON'T WANT ME.Copy !req
320. I MEAN, EVEN DOING THIS
GETS PEOPLE LOOKING AT MECopy !req
321. IN THE MOST EXTRAORDINARY WAY.Copy !req
322. VICAR, WE MUST BE GETTING ON.Copy !req
323. I KNEW I'D DISTURB YOU,
I KNEW I'D DISTURB YOU.Copy !req
324. IT ALWAYS HAPPENS.Copy !req
325. WHENEVER I'VE FOUND SOMEONECopy !req
326. I REALLY THINK I'M GOING
TO BE ABLE TO GET ON WITH...Copy !req
327. NO, THE THING IS,
WE'RE GOING TO BE LATE...Copy !req
328. DARLING, COME ON, LET'S STAY.Copy !req
329. WELL, JUST
A LITTLE BIT.Copy !req
330. I MEAN, WE WILL
BE LATE IF WE DON'T...Copy !req
331. OH, THANK YOU,
YOU'RE VERY KIND.Copy !req
332. AS IT TURNED OUTCopy !req
333. OUR CHANCE MEETING WITH
THE REVEREND ARTHUR BELLINGCopy !req
334. WAS TO CHANGE
OUR WHOLE WAY OF LIFECopy !req
335. AND EVERY SUNDAYCopy !req
336. WE'D HURRYALONG TO ST. LOONY
UP THE CREAM BUN AND JAM...Copy !req
337. AND NOW...Copy !req
338. IT'S...Copy !req
339. MONTY PYTHON'S
FLYING CIRCUSESES.Copy !req
340. RIGHT, SIR, ONE SAFARI SNOWBALL.Copy !req
341. THAT COMES TO £1,361.48Copy !req
342. AND WE'LL THROW
THE NUDE MAN IN FOR FREE.Copy !req
343. ALL RIGHT, GENTLEMEN,
LAST ORDERS, PLEASE.Copy !req
344. OH, DO YOU WANT A DRINK
BEFORE THEY CLOSE?Copy !req
345. NO, I WANT A KISS.Copy !req
346. OH, GOODY.Copy !req
347. AND SO THEY
LIVED HAPPILY EVER AFTER.Copy !req
348. BUT NOW...Copy !req
349. THE "FREE REPETITION OF DOUBTFUL WORDS
SKIT, SPOOF, JAPE, OR VIGNETTE"Copy !req
350. BY A VERY UNDERRATED WRITER.Copy !req
351. I HAVE COMECopy !req
352. FOR SOME FREE REPETITION
OF DOUBTFUL WORDSCopy !req
353. ON AN INLAND TELEGRAM.Copy !req
354. HAVE YOU THE TELEGRAM
IN QUESTION?Copy !req
355. I HAVE THE
VERY THING HERE.Copy !req
356. WELL, SLIP IT TO ME,
MY GOOD CHAPCopy !req
357. AND LET ME EYE
THE CONTENTS.Copy !req
358. AT ONCE, MR. TELEGRAM
ENQUIRY MAN.Copy !req
359. THANK YOU,
MR. CUSTOMER MAN.Copy !req
360. HA-HO! "PARLING,
I GLOVE YOU.Copy !req
361. "CLEASE CLOME
AT BRONCE.Copy !req
362. YOUR TROVING
SWIFE, PAT."Copy !req
363. WHICH WAS THE WORD
YOU WANTED CHECKING?Copy !req
364. "PAT."Copy !req
365. "PAT"?Copy !req
366. MY WIFE'S NAME IS
NOT PAT AT ALL.Copy !req
367. NO?Copy !req
368. IT'S BAT
WITH A "B."Copy !req
369. AND THEREFORE
I WILL TAKECopy !req
370. A QUICK LOOK
IN THE BOOK.Copy !req
371. RIPPING.Copy !req
372. YOU'RE QUITE
RIGHT, OLD COCK.Copy !req
373. THERE HAS BEEN
A MISTAKE.Copy !req
374. I THOUGHT AS MUCH.Copy !req
375. WHAT REALLY
DOES IT SAY?Copy !req
376. IT SAY, "GO AWAY, YOU
SILLY LITTLE BLEEDERCopy !req
377. "I AM HAVING
ANOTHER MAN.Copy !req
378. LOVE, BAT."Copy !req
379. QUITE SOME ERROR.Copy !req
380. YES, SHE WOULDN'T
CALL HERSELF PAT.Copy !req
381. IT'S SILLY.Copy !req
382. DAFT, I CALL IT.Copy !req
383. WELL, IT HAS BEEN A
PLEASURE WORKING WITH YOU.Copy !req
384. FOR ME, ALSO, IT HAS
BEEN A PLEASURE.Copy !req
385. AND THAT CONCLUDES
OUR LITTLE SKIT.Copy !req
386. THE "FREE REPETITION
OF DOUBTFUL WORDS THING"Copy !req
387. BYA JUSTLY UNDERRATED WRITER.Copy !req
388. THE END.Copy !req
389. GOOD EVENING,
TONIGHT ON IS THERE?Copy !req
390. WE EXAMINE THE QUESTION,
"IS THERE A LIFE AFTER DEATH?"Copy !req
391. AND HERE TO DISCUSS IT
ARE THREE DEAD PEOPLE...Copy !req
392. THE LATE SIR BRIAN HARDAKERCopy !req
393. FORMER CURATOR
OF THE IMPERIAL WAR MUSEUMCopy !req
394. THE LATE PROFESSOR THYNNECopy !req
395. UNTIL RECENTLY AN ACADEMIC
CRITIC AND BROADCASTERCopy !req
396. AND PUTTING THE POINT OF VIEW
OF THE CHURCH OF ENGLANDCopy !req
397. THE VERY LATE
PREBENDARY REVEREND ROSS.Copy !req
398. GENTLEMEN, IS THERE A LIFE
AFTER DEATH OR NOT?Copy !req
399. SIR BRIAN?Copy !req
400. PROFESSOR?Copy !req
401. PREBENDARY?Copy !req
402. WELL, THERE WE HAVE IT...
THREE SAY "NO."Copy !req
403. ON IS THERE? NEXT WEEK,
WE'LL BE DISCUSSING THE QUESTIONCopy !req
404. "IS THERE ENOUGH OF IT ABOUT?"Copy !req
405. UNTIL THEN, GOOD NIGHT.Copy !req
406. GOOD DOCTOR
MORNING.Copy !req
407. NICE YEAR FOR
THE TIME OF DAY.Copy !req
408. COME IN.Copy !req
409. CAN I DOWN SIT?Copy !req
410. CERTAINLY.Copy !req
411. WELL, THEN?Copy !req
412. WELL, I'M NOT GOINGCopy !req
413. TO BUSH THE DOCTOR
ABOUT THE BEAT TOO LONG.Copy !req
414. I'M GOING TO COME TO POINT
THE STRAIGHT IMMEDIATELY.Copy !req
415. GOOD, GOOD.Copy !req
416. MY PARTICULAR PROBCopy !req
417. OR BUGLEM BEAR, I'VE HAD AGES.Copy !req
418. FOR YEARS,
I'VE HAD IT FOR DONKEYS.Copy !req
419. WHAT?Copy !req
420. I'M UP TO HERE WITH IT.Copy !req
421. I'M SICK TO DEATH.Copy !req
422. I CAN'T TAKE YOU ANY LONGERCopy !req
423. SO I'VE COME
TO SEE IT.Copy !req
424. AH, NOW, THIS IS
YOUR PROBLEM WITH WORDS.Copy !req
425. THIS IS MY
PROBLEM WITH WORDS.Copy !req
426. OH, THAT SEEMS
TO HAVE CLEARED IT.Copy !req
427. YES, THAT SEEMS
TO BE ALL RIGHT.Copy !req
428. THANK YOU VERY MUCH.Copy !req
429. I SEE, UH, BUT RECENTLY
YOU HAVE BEEN HAVINGCopy !req
430. THIS PROBLEM
WITH YOUR WORD ORDER.Copy !req
431. WELL, ABSOLUTELY,
AND WHAT MAKES IT WORSECopy !req
432. IS THAT SOMETIMES
AT THE END OF A SENTENCECopy !req
433. I'LL COME OUT
WITH THE WRONG FUSE BOX.Copy !req
434. "FUSE BOX"?Copy !req
435. AND THE THING ABOUT
SAYING THE WRONG WORDCopy !req
436. IS THAT "A," I DON'T NOTICE ITCopy !req
437. AND "B," SOMETIMES
ORANGE WATER GIVENCopy !req
438. BUCKET OF PLASTER.Copy !req
439. YES, TELL ME MORE
ABOUT YOUR PROBLEM.Copy !req
440. WELL, AS I SAY,
YOU'D JUST BE TALKINGCopy !req
441. AND OUT'LL PUDENDA
THE WRONG WORDCopy !req
442. AND ASHTRAY'S
YOUR UNCLE.Copy !req
443. I'M AWFULLY
STRAWBERRY ABOUT IT.Copy !req
444. UPSET?Copy !req
445. IT'S SO EMBARRASSINGCopy !req
446. WHEN MY WIFE AND I
GO TO AN ORGY.Copy !req
447. A PARTY?Copy !req
448. NO, AN ORGY.Copy !req
449. WE LIVE IN ESHER.Copy !req
450. QUITE.Copy !req
451. THAT'S WHAT I SAID.Copy !req
452. IT'S SUCH A BLOODY
WHACK THE DIDDLE-OCopy !req
453. FAL-DI-RAL, FA-DI-DA,
LO-DI-DO-DI-DO-FUM-FUM.Copy !req
454. MR. BURROWS, THIS IS
NO COMMON PROBLEM.Copy !req
455. YOU ARE SUFFERING
FROM A DISEASE SO RARECopy !req
456. THAT IT HASN'T GOT
A NAME... NOT YET.Copy !req
457. BUT IT WILL
HAVE, OH, YES!Copy !req
458. THIS IS THE OPPORTUNITY
I'VE BEEN WAITING FOR...Copy !req
459. THE CHANCE OF A LIFETIME!Copy !req
460. I'LL SHOW THEM AT
THE ROYAL COLLEGE OF SURGEONS.Copy !req
461. I'LL MAKE THEM SIT UP
AND TAKE NOTICE.Copy !req
462. THRIPSHAW'S DISEASE!Copy !req
463. DISCOVERED BY
E. HENRY THRIPSHAW, M.D.Copy !req
464. I'LL BE INVITED ON CALL MY
BLUFF, AND THE MERCHANDISING...Copy !req
465. THERE'LL BE
E. HENRY THRIPSHAW T-SHIRTS!Copy !req
466. I'LL TURN IT INTO A GAME!Copy !req
467. I'LL SELL THE FILM RIGHTS!Copy !req
468. THAT CLIP... COMES FROM THE
NEW DAVID O. SELTZER... FILM.Copy !req
469. THE AUTHOR...Copy !req
470. OF THAT FILM CLIP...Copy !req
471. IS WITH ME...Copy !req
472. NOW.Copy !req
473. DR. E. HENRY...Copy !req
474. THRIPSHAW.Copy !req
475. WELL, I FEEL THAT THEY'VE MISSED
THE WHOLE POINT OF MY DISEASE.Copy !req
476. THIS IS...Copy !req
477. ALWAYS THE PROBLEM... WITH...Copy !req
478. DIRECTORS...Copy !req
479. OF FILM...Copy !req
480. CLIPS.Copy !req
481. YES, WELL, YOU SEECopy !req
482. THEY'VE DRAGGED IN
ALL THIS IRRELEVANT MUSH.Copy !req
483. WHAT...Copy !req
484. ARE YOU DOING...Copy !req
485. NOW?Copy !req
486. WELL, AT THE PRESENT MOMENT,
I'M WORKING ON A NEW DISEASECopy !req
487. WHICH I HOPE TO TURN
INTO A MUSICAL...Copy !req
488. BUT PRIMARILY, WE ARE WORKING
ON A REMAKE OF MY FIRST DISEASECopy !req
489. AND THIS TIME WE'RE HOPING
TO DO IT PROPERLY.Copy !req
490. WELL...Copy !req
491. LET'S JUST...Copy !req
492. TAKE A...Copy !req
493. LOOK AT THIS NEW...Copy !req
494. FILM...Copy !req
495. CLIP.Copy !req
496. WELL, NOW, WHAT SEEMS
TO BE THE MATTER?Copy !req
497. THE NEXT SKETCH FOLLOWS
AFTER SOME SILLY NOISES.Copy !req
498. COME IN.Copy !req
499. I WONDERED IF
I COULD HAVECopy !req
500. A WORD WITH YOU
FOR A MOMENT.Copy !req
501. BY ALL MEANS,
BY ALL MEANS, SIR.Copy !req
502. DO SIT DOWN.Copy !req
503. UH... SIT ON
THE DESK HERE.Copy !req
504. OH, THANK YOU.Copy !req
505. NOW THEN,
GLASS OF SHERRY?Copy !req
506. NO, THANK YOU.Copy !req
507. ARE YOU SURE?Copy !req
508. I'M GOING TO HAVE SOME.Copy !req
509. WELL, IF YOU'RE
HAVING SOMECopy !req
510. YES, THEN
PERHAPS, VICAR.Copy !req
511. OH, THERE'S ONLY
JUST ENOUGH FOR ME.Copy !req
512. WELL, IN THAT CASECopy !req
513. I WON'T,
DON'T WORRY.Copy !req
514. YOU SEE, IF I SPLIT
WHAT'S LEFTCopy !req
515. WELL, THERE'D HARDLY BE
ANY LEFT FOR ME AT ALL.Copy !req
516. WELL, I'M NOT A GREAT
SHERRY DRINKER.Copy !req
517. GOOD, SO I CAN
HAVE IT ALL.Copy !req
518. NOW THEN, WHAT'S
THE PROBLEM?Copy !req
519. WELL, JUST
RECENTLYCopy !req
520. I'VE BEGUN TO
WORRY ABOUT...Copy !req
521. OH!Copy !req
522. FOUND ANOTHER BOTTLE.Copy !req
523. YOU CAN HAVE SOME
NOW IF YOU WANT TO.Copy !req
524. OH, WELL THEN, YES,
PERHAPS A LITTLE.Copy !req
525. OH, YOU DON'T HAVE TO,
I CAN DRINK THE WHOLE BOTTLE.Copy !req
526. UM, IN THAT CASE, NO.Copy !req
527. GOOD, THAT'S ANOTHER
BOTTLE FOR ME... RIGHT.Copy !req
528. I'VE BEGUN TO WORRY
RECENTLY THAT...Copy !req
529. COME IN!Copy !req
530. AH, MR. HUSBAND.Copy !req
531. THIS IS MR. KIRKHAM,
ONE OF MY PARISHIONERS.Copy !req
532. THIS IS MR. HUSBANDCopy !req
533. OF THE BRITISH
SHERRY CORPORATION.Copy !req
534. LOOK, LOOK, PERHAPS
I BETTER COME BACK LATER.Copy !req
535. NO, NO, NO,
DO STAY HERE.Copy !req
536. HAVE A SHERRY.Copy !req
537. YOU WON'T BE LONG,
WILL YOU, HUSBAND?Copy !req
538. OH, NO, VICAR,
JUST A QUESTIONCopy !req
539. OF SIGNING
A FEW FORMS.Copy !req
540. THERE WE ARE.Copy !req
541. THERE WE ARE,
MR. HUSBAND.Copy !req
542. NOW, HOW ABOUT
YOU, MR. KIRKHAM?Copy !req
543. WELL, ONLY IF
THERE'S ENOUGH.Copy !req
544. AH, WELL, THERE'S
NOT MUCH NOW.Copy !req
545. OH... IN THAT CASE,
NO, I WON'T.Copy !req
546. GOOD. RIGHT.Copy !req
547. RIGHT, NOW THEN.Copy !req
548. WHAT IS THE
PROBLEM, HUSBAND?Copy !req
549. WELL, VICAR, I'VE MADE
ENQUIRIES WITH OUR SHIPPERSCopy !req
550. AND THE MOST SHERRY
THEY CAN SHIP IN ANY ONE LOADCopy !req
551. IS 12,000 GALLONS.Copy !req
552. AND HOW MANY GLASSES IS THAT?Copy !req
553. THAT'S ROUGHLY
540,000 GLASSES, VICAR.Copy !req
554. THAT'S EXCELLENT,
HUSBAND, EXCELLENT.Copy !req
555. YES, IT MEANS YOU CAN STILL KEEP
YOUR MAIN SHERRY SUPPLYCopy !req
556. ON THE ROOF, BUT YOU CAN
HAVE AN EMERGENCY SUPPLYCopy !req
557. UNDERNEATH THE VESTRY,
OF 5,000 GALLONS.Copy !req
558. OR I COULD HAVE
DRY SHERRY ON THE ROOFCopy !req
559. AND AMONTILLADO
IN THE UNDERGROUND TANK.Copy !req
560. ABSOLUTELY.Copy !req
561. EXCELLENT
WORK, HUSBANDCopy !req
562. EXCELLENT WORK.Copy !req
563. NOT AT ALL,
VICAR.Copy !req
564. YOU'RE ONE OF
OUR BEST CUSTOMERS...Copy !req
565. YOU AND THE
UNITED STATES.Copy !req
566. BYE-BYE, TERRIFIC.Copy !req
567. NOW, THEN, MR. KIRKHAM,
I AM SO SORRY, DO GO ON.Copy !req
568. WELL, IT'S JUST
THAT RECENTLYCopy !req
569. I'VE BEGUN TO
WORRY ABOUT...Copy !req
570. WELL, LOOK, DOES
THE BIBLE INTEND...Copy !req
571. HEY, HEY, HEY!Copy !req
572. ARRIBA! ARRIBA!Copy !req
573. OLE!Copy !req
574. WHAT DID YOU WANT?Copy !req
575. DIRTY BOOKS, PLEASE.Copy !req
576. RIGHT.Copy !req
577. E. HENRY THRIPSHAW T-SHIRTS
ARE NOW AVAILABLECopy !req
578. FROM BBC ENTERPRISES.Copy !req
579. THE PRICE HASN'T
FINALLY BEEN DECIDEDCopy !req
580. AND THE ADDRESS TO WRITE TOCopy !req
581. THEY HAVEN'T YET
QUITE WORKED OUT.Copy !req