1. HERE IS A PREVIEWCopy !req
2. OF SOME OF THE PROGRAMS
YOU'LL BE ABLE TO SEECopy !req
3. COMING SHORTLY
ON BBC TELEVISION.Copy !req
4. TO KICK OFF WITH,
THERE'S VARIETY.Copy !req
5. PETER WESTAND BRIAN JOHNSON
STAR IN RAIN STOPPED PLAYCopy !req
6. A WACKY NEW COMEDY SERIESCopy !req
7. ABOUT THE GAY EXPLOITS OF TWO
TELEVISION CRICKET COMMENTATORSCopy !req
8. WITH E.W. SWANTON AS AGGIE,
THE KOOKY SCOTS MAID.Copy !req
9. FOR THOSE OF YOU WHO DON'T LIKE
VARIETY, THERE'S VARIETYCopy !req
10. WITH BRIAN CLOSE
AT THE TALK OF THE TOWN.Copy !req
11. AND OF COURSE,
THERE'LL BE SPORT.Copy !req
12. THE CLASSICS SERIES
RETURN TO BBC 2Copy !req
13. WITH 26 EPISODES OF JOHN
GALSWORTHY'S "SNOOKER MY WA Y"Copy !req
14. WITH NYREE DAWN PORTER
REPEATING HER TRIUMPHCopy !req
15. AS JOE DA VIS.Copy !req
16. AND OF COURSE,
THERE'LL BE SPORT.Copy !req
17. COMEDY IS NOT FORGOTTEN,
WITH JIM LAKERCopy !req
18. IN 13 WEEKS
OF OFFSPIN BOWLING.Copy !req
19. JIM PLAYS
THE ZANY BACHELOR BOWLERCopy !req
20. IN A NEW SERIES, OWZATCopy !req
21. WITH ANNELEY DRUMMOND-HA YE,
ON MR. SOFTEE, AS HIS WIFE.Copy !req
22. AND OF COURSE,
THERE'LL BE SPORT.Copy !req
23. PANORAMA WILL BE RETURNINGCopy !req
24. INTRODUCED AS USUAL
BY TONY JACKLINCopy !req
25. AND LULU WILL BE TACKLING
THE OLD MAN OF HOY.Copy !req
26. AND FOR THOSE OF YOU WHO PREFER
DRAMA, THERE'S SPORT.Copy !req
27. ON SHOW OF THE WEEK,
KENNETH WOSTENHOLME SINGS.Copy !req
28. AND FOR THOSE OF YOU
WHO DON'T LIKE TELEVISIONCopy !req
29. THERE'S DAVID COLEMAN.Copy !req
30. AND OF COURSE,
THERE'LL BE SPORT.Copy !req
31. BUT NOW FOR SOMETHING
COMPLETELY DIFFERENT...Copy !req
32. SPORT.Copy !req
33. MONTY PYTHON'S FLYING CIRCUS.Copy !req
34. GO ON. BLIMEY!Copy !req
35. LOOK WHAT WE FOUND!Copy !req
36. WHAT AN AMAZING FIND.Copy !req
37. IT REALLY IS FANTASTIC.Copy !req
38. IT'S THE ARCHAEOLOGICAL
FIND OF THE CENTURY.Copy !req
39. IT IS, INDEED, INDEED, INDEED.Copy !req
40. GENTLEMEN, FROM THIS SINGLE PARTCopy !req
41. AND MONTHS
OF PAINSTAKING RESEARCHCopy !req
42. WE HAVE BEEN ABLE TO ACCURATELY
RECONSTRUCT THIS ENTIRE BEAST.Copy !req
43. HELLO.Copy !req
44. ON ARCHAEOLOGY TODAY
TONIGHTCopy !req
45. I HAVE WITH ME
PROFESSOR LUCIEN KASTNERCopy !req
46. OF OSLO UNIVERSITY.Copy !req
47. GOOD EVENING.Copy !req
48. HOW TALL ARE YOU,
PROFESSOR?Copy !req
49. I BEG
YOUR PARDON?Copy !req
50. HOW TALL ARE YOU?Copy !req
51. I'M ABOUT
FIVE FOOT TEN.Copy !req
52. AND AN EXPERT
IN EGYPTIAN TOMB PAINTINGSCopy !req
53. SIR ROBERT... ARE YOU
REALLY FIVE FOOT TEN?Copy !req
54. YES.Copy !req
55. FUNNY, YOU LOOK MUCH
SHORTER THAN THAT TO ME.Copy !req
56. ARE YOU SLUMPED FORWARD
IN YOUR CHAIR AT ALL?Copy !req
57. UH, NO, I, I...Copy !req
58. EXTRAORDINARY.Copy !req
59. SIR ROBERT EVERSLEYCopy !req
60. WHO'S JUST RETURNED FROM
THE EXCAVATIONS AT EL ARACopy !req
61. AND WHO MUST BE
WELL OVER SIX FOOT.Copy !req
62. ISN'T THAT RIGHT,
SIR ROBERT?Copy !req
63. YES.Copy !req
64. IN FACT, I THINKCopy !req
65. YOU'RE SIX FOOT FIVE,
AREN'T YOU?Copy !req
66. UH, YES.Copy !req
67. OH, THAT'S MARVELOUS.Copy !req
68. I MEAN, YOU'RECopy !req
69. A TOTALLY DIFFERENT
KIND OF SPECIMENCopy !req
70. TO PROFESSOR KASTNER.Copy !req
71. STRAIGHT
IN YOUR SEATCopy !req
72. ERECT, FIRM...Copy !req
73. YES. I THOUGHT
WE WERE HERECopy !req
74. TO DISCUSS
ARCHAEOLOGY.Copy !req
75. YES, YES,
OF COURSE WE ARE.Copy !req
76. YES, ABSOLUTELY, YOU'RE
ABSOLUTELY RIGHT!Copy !req
77. THAT'S POSITIVE
THINKING FOR YOU.Copy !req
78. YOU WOULDN'T HAVE SAID
A THING LIKE THAT, WOULD YOUCopy !req
79. YOU FIVE-FOOT-TEN-INCH WEED?Copy !req
80. SIR ROBERT EVERSLEY...
WHO'S VERY INTERESTING...Copy !req
81. WHAT HAVE YOU
DISCOVEREDCopy !req
82. IN THE EXCAVATIONS
AT EL ARA?Copy !req
83. WELL, BASICALLY,
WE HAVE FOUNDCopy !req
84. A COMPLEX OF TOMBS...Copy !req
85. VERY GOOD SPEAKING VOICE.Copy !req
86. WHICH PRESENT
DRAMATIC EVIDENCECopy !req
87. OF POLYNESIAN INFLUENCECopy !req
88. IN EGYPT
IN THE THIRD DYNASTYCopy !req
89. WHICH IS
QUITE REMARKABLE.Copy !req
90. HOW TALL WERE
THE POLYNESIANS?Copy !req
91. THEY WERE...Copy !req
92. SHH!Copy !req
93. WELL, THEY WERE
RATHER SMALL, SEAFARING...Copy !req
94. SHORT MEN, WERE THEY...
ALL SQUAT AND BENT UP?Copy !req
95. WELL, I REALLY
DON'T KNOW.Copy !req
96. WHO WERE THE TALL PEOPLE?Copy !req
97. I'M AFRAID
I DON'T KNOW.Copy !req
98. WHO'S THAT VERY TALL TRIBE
IN AFRICA?Copy !req
99. WELL, THIS IS HARDLY
ARCHAEOLOGY.Copy !req
100. THE WATUTSI,
THAT'S IT, THE WATUTSI!Copy !req
101. OH, THAT'S THE TRIBE.Copy !req
102. SOME OF THEM
WERE EIGHT FOOT TALL.Copy !req
103. OH! CAN YOU IMAGINE THAT?Copy !req
104. EIGHT FOOT OF WATUTSI.Copy !req
105. NOT ONE ON ANOTHER'S
SHOULDERS, OH, NO!Copy !req
106. EIGHT FOOT OF SOLID WATUTSI!Copy !req
107. THAT'S WHAT I CALL TALL.Copy !req
108. YES, BUT IT'S NOTHING
TO DO WITH ARCHAEOLOGY.Copy !req
109. OH, TO HELL
WITH ARCHAEOLOGY!Copy !req
110. MAY I PLEASE SPEAK?Copy !req
111. I CAME
ALL THE WAY FROM OSLOCopy !req
112. TO DO THIS PROGRAM.Copy !req
113. I'M A PROFESSOR
OF ARCHAEOLOGY!Copy !req
114. I'M AN EXPERT IN
ANCIENT CIVILIZATIONS.Copy !req
115. ALL RIGHT, I'M
ONLY FIVE FOOT TEN.Copy !req
116. ALL RIGHT, MY
POSTURE IS BADCopy !req
117. ALL RIGHT, I SLUMP
IN MY CHAIR.Copy !req
118. BUT I'VE HAD MORE WOMEN
THAN EITHER OF YOU TWO!Copy !req
119. I'VE HAD
HALF OF BLOODY NORWAYCopy !req
120. THAT'S WHAT I'VE HAD!Copy !req
121. SO, YOU CAN KEEP
YOUR ROBERT EVERSLEY!Copy !req
122. AND KEEP
YOUR BLOODY WATUTSI!Copy !req
123. I'D RATHER
HAVE MY LITTLE BODY!Copy !req
124. MY LITTLE, FIVE-FOOT-
TEN-INCH BODY.Copy !req
125. BLOODY FOOL, LOOK WHAT
YOU'VE DONE TO HIM.Copy !req
126. DON'T
"BLOODY FOOL" ME.Copy !req
127. I'LL DO WHAT I LIKECopy !req
128. BECAUSE I'M
SIX FOOT FIVECopy !req
129. AND I EAT PUNKS LIKE
YOU FOR BREAKFAST.Copy !req
130. I'LL GET YOU
FOR THAT, EVERSLEY!Copy !req
131. I'LL GET YOU
IF I HAVE TO TRAVELCopy !req
132. TO THE FOUR CORNERS
OF THE EARTH!Copy !req
133. THE DIG WAS
GOING WELL THAT YEAR.Copy !req
134. WE'D DISCOVERED
SOME HITTITE BAKING DISHESCopy !req
135. FROM THE FIFTH DYNASTY.Copy !req
136. AND SIR ROBERT WAS HAPPIER
THAN I'D EVER SEEN HIM.Copy !req
137. WHY!Copy !req
138. A SUMERIAN DRINKING VESSEL
OF THE FOURTH DYNASTY.Copy !req
139. CATALOGUE THIS POT,
DANIELLE.Copy !req
140. IT'S... FOURTH DYNASTY.Copy !req
141. OH! IS IT?Copy !req
142. YES, IT'S... SUMERIAN.Copy !req
143. OH, HOW WONDERFUL!Copy !req
144. OH, I AM SO HAPPY FOR YOU.Copy !req
145. I'M HAPPY, TOO.Copy !req
146. NOW AT LAST WE KNOW
THERE WAS A SUMERIAN INFLUENCECopy !req
147. HERE IN ABU SIMNEL IN THE EARLY
PRE-DYNASTIC PERIODCopy !req
148. 2,000 YEARS BEFORE
THE REIGN OF TUTANKHAMEN.Copy !req
149. ALL RIGHT, EVERSLEY,
GET UP OUT OF THAT TRENCH.Copy !req
150. DON'T FORGET...Copy !req
151. I'M SIX FOOT FIVE.Copy !req
152. THAT DOESN'T WORRY ME.Copy !req
153. KASTNER!Copy !req
154. HERE, LORD.Copy !req
155. UP!Copy !req
156. ELEVEN FOOT THREE?Copy !req
157. I'M SO TALL! I AM SO TALL!Copy !req
158. DANIELLE.Copy !req
159. ELEVEN FOOT SIX.Copy !req
160. DAMN YOU!Copy !req
161. ABDUL!Copy !req
162. FIFTEEN FOOT FOUR!Copy !req
163. MUSTAPHA!Copy !req
164. NINETEEN FOOT THREE!Copy !req
165. DAMN YOU!Copy !req
166. UH, AND THERE WE END THIS
EDITION OF ARCHAEOLOGY TODAY.Copy !req
167. NEXT WEEK, THE SILBURY DIG
BY COLE PORTERCopy !req
168. WITH PEARL BAILEY
AND ARTHUR NEGUS.Copy !req
169. AND NOWAN APPEAL FOR SANITYCopy !req
170. FROM THE REVEREND
ARTHUR BELLING.Copy !req
171. YOU KNOW, THERE ARE MANY PEOPLE
IN THE COUNTRY TODAYCopy !req
172. WHO, THROUGH NO FAULT
OF THEIR OWN, ARE SANE.Copy !req
173. SOME OF THEM WERE BORN SANE.Copy !req
174. SOME OF THEM BECAME SANE
LATER IN THEIR LIVES.Copy !req
175. IT IS UP TO PEOPLE
LIKE YOU AND MECopy !req
176. WHO ARE OUT OF OUR
TINY LITTLE MINDS...Copy !req
177. TO TRY AND HELP THESE PEOPLE
OVERCOME THEIR SANITY.Copy !req
178. YOU CAN START IN SMALL WAYSCopy !req
179. WITH PING-PONG BALL EYES
AND A FUNNY VOICECopy !req
180. AND THEN YOU CAN PAINT
HALF OF YOUR BODY REDCopy !req
181. AND THE OTHER HALF GREENCopy !req
182. AND THEN YOU CAN JUMP UP
AND DOWN IN A BOWL OF TREACLECopy !req
183. GOING...Copy !req
184. AND THEN YOU CAN GO,
"NEURH, NEURH, NEURH!"Copy !req
185. AND THEN YOU CAN ROLL
AROUND ON THE FLOORCopy !req
186. GOING "PTING, PTING,
PTING, PTING."Copy !req
187. THE REVEREND ARTHUR BELLINGCopy !req
188. IS VICAR OF ST. LOONY
UP THE CREAM BUN AND JAM.Copy !req
189. AND NOW...Copy !req
190. GOOD EVENING.Copy !req
191. MY NAME IS LEAPY LEE.Copy !req
192. NO, SORRY... THAT'S THE NAME
OF ME FAVORITE SINGER.Copy !req
193. MY NAME IS MRS. FRED STOLLE.Copy !req
194. NO, NO, MRS. FRED STOLLE ISCopy !req
195. THE WIFE OF ME FAVORITE
TENNIS PLAYER.Copy !req
196. MY NAME IS BANANAS.Copy !req
197. NO, NO, THAT'S
ME FAVORITE FRUIT.Copy !req
198. I'M MRS. A-NICE-EVENING-
OUT-TO-THE-PICTURES-Copy !req
199. THEN-PERHAPS-A-DANCE-AT-A-CLUB-
THEN-BACK-TO-HIS-PLACE-Copy !req
200. FOR-A-QUICK-CUP-OF-COFFEE-
AND-A-LITTLE-BIT-OF...Copy !req
201. NO, NO, SORRY.Copy !req
202. THAT'S ME FAVORITE WAY
OF SPENDING A NIGHT OUT.Copy !req
203. PERHAPS I AM LEAPY LEE.Copy !req
204. YES! I MUST BE LEAPY LEE!Copy !req
205. HELLO, FANS. LEAPY LEE HERE.Copy !req
206. HELLO?Copy !req
207. EVIDENTLY I'M NOT LEAPY LEE.Copy !req
208. I THOUGHT
I PROBABLY WOULDN'T BE.Copy !req
209. THANK YOU, I'LL TELL THEM.Copy !req
210. HELLO, DENIS COMPTON HERE.Copy !req
211. NO, NO. I SHOULD HAVE
WRITTEN IT DOWN.Copy !req
212. NOW, WHERE'S THAT NUMBER?Copy !req
213. I'M MAO ZEDONG.Copy !req
214. I'M P.P. ARNOLD.Copy !req
215. I'M MARGARET THATCHER.Copy !req
216. I'M SIR GERALD NABARRO.Copy !req
217. HELLO? SIR LEN HUTTON HERE.Copy !req
218. COULD YOU TELL ME, PLEASE...Copy !req
219. OH, AM I?Copy !req
220. OH, THANK YOU.Copy !req
221. GOOD EVENING.Copy !req
222. I'M MRS. WHAT-NUMBER-ARE-
YOU-DIALING-PLEASE?Copy !req
223. GOOD MORNING.Copy !req
224. GOOD MORNING.Copy !req
225. ARE YOU
THE REGISTRAR?Copy !req
226. I HAVE
THAT FUNCTION.Copy !req
227. WELL, I WAS HERE
ON SATURDAYCopy !req
228. GETTING MARRIED
TO A BLOND GIRLCopy !req
229. AND I'D LIKE
TO CHANGE, PLEASE.Copy !req
230. I'D LIKE TO HAVE
THIS ONE INSTEAD, PLEASE.Copy !req
231. WHAT DO YOU MEAN?Copy !req
232. WELL, THE OTHER ONECopy !req
233. WASN'T ANY GOODCopy !req
234. SO I'D LIKE TO SWAP IT
FOR THIS ONE, PLEASE.Copy !req
235. I HAVE PAID;
I PAID ON SATURDAY.Copy !req
236. HERE'S THE TICKET.Copy !req
237. AH, NO, THAT WAS WHEN
YOU WERE MARRIED.Copy !req
238. YES, THAT WAS WHEN I WAS
MARRIED TO THE WRONG ONE.Copy !req
239. I DIDN'T LIKE
THE COLOR.Copy !req
240. THIS IS THE ONE
I WANT TO HAVE.Copy !req
241. SO, IF YOU COULD JUST
CHANGE THE FORMS ROUNDCopy !req
242. I CAN TAKE THIS ONE
BACK WITH ME NOW.Copy !req
243. I CAN'T DO THAT.Copy !req
244. LOOK, MAKE IT SIMPLE,
I'LL PAY AGAIN.Copy !req
245. NO, YOU CAN'T DO THAT.Copy !req
246. LOOK, ALL I WANT
YOU TO DOCopy !req
247. IS CHANGE THE WIFECopy !req
248. SAY THE WORDS,
"BLAH, BLAH, BLAH"Copy !req
249. BACK TO MY PLACE,
NO QUESTIONS ASKED.Copy !req
250. I'M SORRY, SIR, BUT WE'RE
NOT ALLOWED TO CHANGE.Copy !req
251. YOU CAN AT HARRODS.Copy !req
252. YOU CAN'T.Copy !req
253. YOU CAN; I CHANGED
MY RECORD PLAYERCopy !req
254. AND THERE WASN'T A GRUMBLE.Copy !req
255. IT'S DIFFERENT.Copy !req
256. AND I CHANGED MY PET SNAKE.Copy !req
257. AND I CHANGED MY ROBIN DAY TIE.Copy !req
258. WELL, YOU CAN'T CHANGE
A BLOODY WIFE!Copy !req
259. OH, ALL RIGHT!Copy !req
260. WELL, CAN I BORROW ONE
FOR THE WEEKEND?Copy !req
261. NO!Copy !req
262. OH, BLIMEY!Copy !req
263. I ONLY WANTED A JOLLY GOOD...Copy !req
264. ALL RIGHT, BREAK IT UP.Copy !req
265. WHAT'S YOUR
NUMBER, THEN?Copy !req
266. ALL RIGHT. NAME?Copy !req
267. COOK.Copy !req
268. NEXT, PLEASE. NAME?Copy !req
269. UH, WATSON.Copy !req
270. MR. WATSON.Copy !req
271. UH, NO... DOCTOR.Copy !req
272. AH, MR. DOCTOR.Copy !req
273. NO, NOT MISTER... DOCTOR.Copy !req
274. OH. DR. DOCTOR.Copy !req
275. NO. DR. WATSON.Copy !req
276. DR. WATSON DOCTOR.Copy !req
277. OH, JUST CALL ME DARLING.Copy !req
278. HELLO, MR. DARLING.Copy !req
279. NO... DOCTOR!Copy !req
280. HELLO, DOCTOR DARLING.Copy !req
281. BUT AT WEMBLEY,
PLAY HAD RESUMED.Copy !req
282. MEANWHILE, NEARBYCopy !req
283. THE DAY WAS JUST BEGINNING
FOR MUGSY SPANIELCopy !req
284. A CONVICTED GANGSTER
AND WELL-KNOWN SWELL GUY.Copy !req
285. BREAKFAST, DEAR.Copy !req
286. OH, THANK YOU, DEAR.Copy !req
287. HAPPY BIRTHDAY, MUGSY.Copy !req
288. EN JOY THE EGGS.Copy !req
289. YES, INDEED, THIS WAS THE WORK
OF NONE OTHER THAN EGGS DIAMONDCopy !req
290. LEADER OF THE NOTORIOUS
CHICKEN GANG.Copy !req
291. DIMSDALE.Copy !req
292. WITH THE CHICKEN GANG
OFF THE BLOTTERCopy !req
293. A MAN'S LIFE WASN'T WORTH
THE PAPER IT WAS PRINTED ON.Copy !req
294. ALREADY THERE HAVE BEEN MURDERS
COMMITTED HERE AND HERECopy !req
295. AND THE LATEST ONE RIGHT HERE.Copy !req
296. HE'S RIGHT,
YOU KNOW.Copy !req
297. THE POWERFUL FORCES
EGGS HAD LOOSED ON THE CITYCopy !req
298. WERE TO BE HIS UNDOING.Copy !req
299. RETURN WITH US NOW
TO THE HIDEOUT.Copy !req
300. THESE AND OTHER FASCINATING LIES
ARE YOURS FOR THE READINGCopy !req
301. IN THIS BEAUTIFULLY
BOUND VOLUME.Copy !req
302. BUY IT NOW, SUCKERS.Copy !req
303. THIS IS AN IDEAL GIFT...
A MUST FOR ALL YOU OUT THERECopy !req
304. WHO LONG TO SOUND CLEVER
AT YOUR NEXT COCKTAIL PARTY.Copy !req
305. AH, JOHN...Copy !req
306. ALLOW ME TO INTRODUCE
MY NEXT-DOOR NEIGHBOR.Copy !req
307. JOHN STOKESCopy !req
308. THIS IS A SNIVELING
LITTLE RAT-FACED GIT.Copy !req
309. HELLO, I NOTICED A
SLIGHT LOOK OF ANXIETYCopy !req
310. CROSS YOUR FACE
FOR A MOMENT JUST THEN.Copy !req
311. BUT YOU NEEDN'T WORRY,
I'M USED TO IT.Copy !req
312. THAT'S THE TROUBLECopy !req
313. OF HAVING
A SURNAME LIKE "GIT."Copy !req
314. OH... YES, YES.Copy !req
315. WE THOUGHT ABOUT
CHANGING IT BY DEED-POLLCopy !req
316. TO WATSON
OR SOMETHING LIKE THAT.Copy !req
317. BUT A SNIVELING LITTLE
RAT-FACED WATSON'SCopy !req
318. JUST AS BAD, EH?Copy !req
319. YES, YES, I SUPPOSE SO.Copy !req
320. OH, THAT'S MY WIFE.Copy !req
321. DARLING, COME AND MEET
MR... WHAT WAS IT?Copy !req
322. STOKES,
JOHN STOKES.Copy !req
323. OH, YES. JOHN STOKES,
THIS IS MY WIFECopy !req
324. DREARY FAT
BORING OLD.Copy !req
325. OH, UH, HOW DO YOU DO?Copy !req
326. HOW DO YOU DO?Copy !req
327. DARLING,
THERE YOU ARE.Copy !req
328. YES, YES,
HERE I AM, YES.Copy !req
329. OH, IS THIS
YOUR WIFE?Copy !req
330. YES, YES, YES,
THIS IS THE WIFE.Copy !req
331. YES.Copy !req
332. UM... DARLING,
THESE...Copy !req
333. THESE ARE THE GITS.Copy !req
334. WHAT?Copy !req
335. THE GITS.Copy !req
336. OH, HEAVEN'S SAKES,
WE ARE BEING FORMAL.Copy !req
337. DOES IT HAVE
TO BE SURNAMES?Copy !req
338. OH, NO, NO.Copy !req
339. NOT AT ALL.Copy !req
340. UM, NO, THIS...
THIS IS MY WIFE, NORAH.Copy !req
341. UH... NORAH JANE,
NORAH JANE STOKES.Copy !req
342. THIS IS SNIVELING
LITTLE RAT-FACED GIT.Copy !req
343. AND THIS IS
HIS WIFECopy !req
344. DREARY FAT
BORING OLD GIT.Copy !req
345. I WAS JUST TELLING
YOUR HUSBANDCopy !req
346. WHAT AN AWFUL
BORE IT ISCopy !req
347. HAVING A SURNAME
LIKE GIT.Copy !req
348. OH! OH, WELL,
IT'S NOT THAT BAD.Copy !req
349. OH, YOU'VE NO IDEA
HOW THE KIDS GET TAUNTED.Copy !req
350. WHY, ONLY LAST WEEK
DIRTY LYING LITTLE TWO-FACEDCopy !req
351. CAME RUNNING HOME FROM SCHOOL,
SOBBING HIS EYES OUTCopy !req
352. AND OUR YOUNGEST, GHASTLY
SPOTTY HORRIBLE VICIOUS LITTLECopy !req
353. IS JUST AT THE AGECopy !req
354. WHEN TAUNTS LIKE
"SHE'S A GIT" REALLY HURT.Copy !req
355. YES.Copy !req
356. DO... DO YOU
LIVE ROUND HERE?Copy !req
357. YES, WE LIVE UP
THE ROAD, NUMBER 49...Copy !req
358. YOU CAN'T MISS IT.Copy !req
359. WE'VE JUST HAD
THE OUTSIDE PAINTEDCopy !req
360. WITH WARM PUS.Copy !req
361. IT'S VERY NICE,
ACTUALLY.Copy !req
362. GOES NICELY WITH
THE VOMIT AND CATARRHCopy !req
363. WE'VE HAD SMEARED
OVER THE FRONT DOOR.Copy !req
364. I THINK WE OUGHT
TO BE GOING.Copy !req
365. WE HAVE TWO CHILDREN
TO COLLECT.Copy !req
366. OH, WELL, BRING THEM
ROUND FOR TEA TOMORROW.Copy !req
367. IT'S GHASTLY SPOTTY
CROSS-EYED'S BIRTHDAYCopy !req
368. AND SHE'S HAVING A
DISEMBOWELING PARTYCopy !req
369. FOR A FEW FRIENDS.Copy !req
370. THE NAUSEAS WILL BE THERE,
AND DOUG AND JANICE MUCUSCopy !req
371. AND THE RECTUMS
FROM SWANAGE.Copy !req
372. AH, JOHN...Copy !req
373. ALLOW ME TO INTRODUCE
MY NEXT-DOOR NEIGHBOR.Copy !req
374. JOHN, THIS IS MR. WATSON.Copy !req
375. HELLO, I NOTICED A
SLIGHT LOOK OF ANXIETYCopy !req
376. CROSS YOUR FACE
JUST THENCopy !req
377. BUT YOU NEEDN'T WORRY...Copy !req
378. I PREFERRED THE DIRTY VERSION.Copy !req
379. WELL, I'VE BEEN A HUNTER
ALL MY LIFE.Copy !req
380. I LOVE ANIMALS.Copy !req
381. THAT'S WHY I LIKE TO KILL 'EM.Copy !req
382. I WOULDN'T KILL AN ANIMAL
I DIDN'T LIKE.Copy !req
383. GOOD DAY, ROY.Copy !req
384. HANK AND ROY SPIM ARE
TOUGH, FEARLESS BACKWOODSMENCopy !req
385. WHO HAVE CHOSEN TO LIVECopy !req
386. IN A VIOLENT, UNRELENTING
WORLD OF NATURE'S CREATURESCopy !req
387. WHERE ONLY THE FITTEST SURVIVE.Copy !req
388. TODAY THEY ARE OFF
TO HUNT MOSQUITOES.Copy !req
389. THE MOSQUITO'S A
CLEVER LITTLE BASTARD.Copy !req
390. YOU CAN TRACK HIM
FOR DAYS AND DAYSCopy !req
391. UNTIL YOU REALLY GET TO KNOW HIM
LIKE A FRIEND.Copy !req
392. HE KNOWS YOU'RE THERE,
AND YOU KNOW HE'S THERE.Copy !req
393. IT'S A GAME OF WITS.Copy !req
394. YOU HATE HIM,
THEN YOU RESPECT HIMCopy !req
395. THEN YOU KILL HIM.Copy !req
396. SUDDENLY, HANK SPOTS
THE MOSQUITO THEY'RE AFTER.Copy !req
397. NOW MORE THAN EVERCopy !req
398. THEY MUST RELY ON THE SKILLS
THEY HAVE LEARNTCopy !req
399. FROM A LIFETIME'S HUNTING.Copy !req
400. HANK GAUGES THE WIND.Copy !req
401. ROY EXAMINES
THE MOSQUITO'S SPOOR.Copy !req
402. THEN...Copy !req
403. IT'S A SUCCESS.Copy !req
404. THE MOSQUITO NOW IS DEAD.Copy !req
405. BUT ROY MUST MAKE SURE.Copy !req
406. THERE'S NOTHING MORE DANGEROUS
THAN A WOUNDED MOSQUITO.Copy !req
407. BUT THE HUNT IS NOT OVER.Copy !req
408. WITH WELL-PRACTICED SKILL,
HANK SKINS THE MOSQUITO.Copy !req
409. THE WINGS OF A FULLY GROWN
MALE MOSQUITO CAN FETCH ANYTHINGCopy !req
410. UP TO.8 OF A PENNY
ON THE OPEN MARKET.Copy !req
411. THE LONG DAY IS OVERCopy !req
412. AND IT'S BACK TO BASE CAMP
FOR A NIGHT'S REST.Copy !req
413. HERE, SURROUNDED
BY THEIR TROPHIESCopy !req
414. ROY AND HANK PREPARE FOR A MUCH
TOUGHER ORDEAL... A MOTH HUNT.Copy !req
415. WELL, I FOLLOW THE MOTH
IN THE HELICOPTERCopy !req
416. TO LURE IT AWAY
FROM THE FLOWERSCopy !req
417. AND THEN ROY COMES ALONG
IN THE LOCKHEED STAR FIGHTERCopy !req
418. AND ATTACKS IT
WITH AIR-TO-AIR MISSILES.Copy !req
419. A LOT OF PEOPLE
HAVE ASKED USCopy !req
420. WHY WE DON'T
USE FLY SPRAY.Copy !req
421. WELL, WHERE'S
THE SPORT IN THAT?Copy !req
422. FOR ROY, SPORT IS EVERYTHING.Copy !req
423. EVER SINCE HE LOST HIS LEFT ARM
BATTLING WITH AN ANTCopy !req
424. ROY HAS RISKED HIS LIFE IN
THE PURSUIT OF TINY CREATURES.Copy !req
425. BUT IT'S NOT ALL WORK,
AND FOR RELAXATIONCopy !req
426. THEY LIKE NOTHING MORE
THAN A DAY'S FISHING.Copy !req
427. WHEREVER THERE IS A CHALLENGE,
HANK AND ROY SPIM WILL BE THERECopy !req
428. READY TO CARRY ON
THE PRIMORDIAL STRUGGLECopy !req
429. BETWEEN MAN
AND INOFFENSIVE, TINY INSECTS.Copy !req
430. OH, I'VE HAD
SUCH A MORNINGCopy !req
431. IN THE HIGH COURT.Copy !req
432. I COULD STAMP
MY LITTLE FEETCopy !req
433. THE WAY THOSE Q.C. S
CARRY ON.Copy !req
434. DON'T I KNOW IT, LOVE.Copy !req
435. OBJECTION HERE,
OBJECTION THERE.Copy !req
436. AND THAT
NICE POLICEMANCopy !req
437. GIVING HIS
EVIDENCE SO WELL...Copy !req
438. BEAUTIFUL
SPEAKING VOICE.Copy !req
439. WELL, AFTER A BITCopy !req
440. ALL I COULD DO WAS
BANG MY LITTLE GAVEL.Copy !req
441. YOU WHAT, LOVE?Copy !req
442. I BANGED ME GAVEL.Copy !req
443. I DID ME "SILENCE
IN COURT" BIT.Copy !req
444. OH! IF LOOKS COULD KILLCopy !req
445. THAT PROSECUTING COUNSEL
WOULD BE IN FOR 30 YEARS.Copy !req
446. HOW DID YOUR
SUMMING UP GO?Copy !req
447. I WAS PLEASED, ACTUALLY.Copy !req
448. I WAS TRYING TOCopy !req
449. "WHAT THE
JURY MUST UNDERSTAND..."Copy !req
450. AND THEY LOVED IT.Copy !req
451. I COULD SEE
THAT FOREMAN EYEING ME.Copy !req
452. REALLY?Copy !req
453. YES, CHEEKY DEVIL.Copy !req
454. WAS HE THAT TALL MAN WITH?Copy !req
455. NO, JUST A MINUTE,
I MUST FINISH.Copy !req
456. ANYWAY, ICopy !req
457. "THE ACTIONS
OF THESE VICIOUS MENCopy !req
458. "IS A VIOLENT STAIN
ON THE COMMUNITYCopy !req
459. "AND THE FULL
PENALTY OF THE LAWCopy !req
460. "IS SCARCELY SUFFICIENTCopy !req
461. TO DEAL WITH
THEIR GHASTLY CRIMES."Copy !req
462. AND I WAGGLED MY WIG.Copy !req
463. JUST EVER SO SLIGHTLYCopy !req
464. BUT IT WAS
A STUNNING EFFECT.Copy !req
465. OH, I BET IT WAS...Copy !req
466. LIKE THAT SUPER TIME
I WORE THAT STRIPED ROBECopy !req
467. IN THE MAGISTRATES COURT.Copy !req
468. OH, AYE.Copy !req
469. HELLO, MRS. THING.Copy !req
470. HELLO, MRS. ENTITY.Copy !req
471. HOW ARE YOU, THEN?Copy !req
472. OH, I HAVE HAD A MORNING.Copy !req
473. BUSY?Copy !req
474. BUSY? HUH!Copy !req
475. I GOT UP AT 5:00Copy !req
476. I MADE MYSELF
A CUP OF TEACopy !req
477. I LOOKED OUT
OF THE WINDOW.Copy !req
478. WELL, BY THEN
I WAS SO WORN OUTCopy !req
479. I HAD TO COME
AND HAVE A SIT-DOWN.Copy !req
480. I'VE BEEN HERE
FOR SEVEN HOURS.Copy !req
481. YOU MUST BE EXHAUSTED.Copy !req
482. OH, HAVE YOU
BEEN SHOPPING?Copy !req
483. NO, I'VE BEEN SHOPPING.Copy !req
484. FUNNY.Copy !req
485. I'M WORN OUT.Copy !req
486. I'VE BEEN SHOPPING
FOR SIX HOURS.Copy !req
487. WHAT HAVE YOU
BOUGHT, THEN?Copy !req
488. NOTHING.Copy !req
489. NOTHING AT ALL.Copy !req
490. A COMPLETE
WASTE OF TIME.Copy !req
491. WICKED, ISN'T IT?Copy !req
492. WICKED, IT'LL BE WORSECopy !req
493. WHEN WE JOIN
THE COMMON MARKET.Copy !req
494. THAT NICE MR. HEATH
WOULD NEVER ALLOW THAT.Copy !req
495. IT'S FUNNY
HE NEVER MARRIED.Copy !req
496. HE'S A BACHELOR.Copy !req
497. OOH! THAT WOULD
EXPLAIN IT.Copy !req
498. OH, DEAR MECopy !req
499. ALL THIS CHATTING AWAY
WEARS ME OUT.Copy !req
500. YES. I BET
MRS. REGINALD MAUDLINGCopy !req
501. DOESN'T HAVE TO PUT UP
WITH ALL THIS DRUDGERYCopy !req
502. GETTING UP AT 5:00
IN THE MORNINGCopy !req
503. MAKING A CUP OF TEACopy !req
504. LOOKING OUT OF THE WINDOW,
CHATTING AWAY.Copy !req
505. NO! IT'D ALL
BE DONE FOR HER.Copy !req
506. YES, SHE'D HAVE
THE WHOLE DAY FREECopy !req
507. FOR PLAYING SNOOKER.Copy !req
508. SHE PROBABLY WOULDN'T GOCopy !req
509. THROUGH ALL THE DRUDGERY
OF PLAYING SNOOKERCopy !req
510. DAY IN, DAY OUT.Copy !req
511. NO, IT WOULD ALL
BE DONE FOR HER.Copy !req
512. SHE WOULDN'T EVEN
HAVE TO LIFT A CUE.Copy !req
513. SHE PROBABLY
DOESN'T EVEN KNOWCopy !req
514. WHAT A BILLIARD
ROOM IS.Copy !req
515. NO... STILL, IT'S NOT
AS BAD AS THE OLD DAYS.Copy !req
516. MRS. STANLEY BALDWINCopy !req
517. USED TO HAVE TO GET UP
AT 5:00 IN THE MORNINGCopy !req
518. AND GO OUT
AND CATCH PARTRIDGESCopy !req
519. WITH HER BARE HANDS.Copy !req
520. YES, AND MRS. WILLIAM
PITT THE ELDERCopy !req
521. USED TO HAVE TO
GET UP AT 3:00Copy !req
522. AND GO BURROWING
FOR TRUFFLESCopy !req
523. WITH THE BRIDGE
OF HER NOSE.Copy !req
524. MRS. BEETHOVEN USED TO
HAVE TO GET UP AT MIDNIGHTCopy !req
525. TO SPUR ON
THE MYNAH BIRD.Copy !req
526. LAZY CREATURES,
MYNAH BIRDS.Copy !req
527. YES.Copy !req
528. WHEN BEETHOVEN WENT DEAFCopy !req
529. THE MYNAH BIRD JUST
USED TO MIME.Copy !req
530. OOH! WHAT'S HAPPENING?Copy !req
531. IT'S ALL RIGHT.Copy !req
532. IT'S ONLY A FLASHBACK.Copy !req
533. YOU DON'T FOOL ME,
YOU STUPID MYNAH BIRD.Copy !req
534. I'M NOT DEAF YET.Copy !req
535. JUST YOU WAIT.Copy !req
536. OH! BUGGER.Copy !req
537. SHUT UP!Copy !req
538. RIGHT IN THE WING.Copy !req
539. SHUT YOUR BEAK!Copy !req
540. GOTT IN HIMMEL,
I NEVER GET ANY PEACE HERE.Copy !req
541. LUDWIG!Copy !req
542. WHAT?Copy !req
543. HAVE YOU SEEN
THE SUGAR BOWL?Copy !req
544. NO, I HAVEN'T SEEN
THE BLOODY SUGAR BOWL!Copy !req
545. YOU KNOW,
THE SUGAR BOWL!Copy !req
546. SOD THE SUGAR BOWL!Copy !req
547. I'M TRYING TO FINISH
THIS STINKING TUNE!Copy !req
548. IT'S DRIVING ME SPARE!Copy !req
549. SO SHUT UP!Copy !req
550. NO, NO, NO, NO, NO.Copy !req
551. LUDWIG, HAVE YOU SEEN
THE JAM SPOON?Copy !req
552. STUFF THE JAM SPOON!Copy !req
553. IT WAS IN
THE SUGAR BOWL!Copy !req
554. LOOK, GET OUT,
YOU OLD RAT-BAG!Copy !req
555. BUZZ OFF AND SHUT UP!Copy !req
556. I DON'T KNOW WHAT
YOU SEE IN THAT PIANO!Copy !req
557. LEAVE ME ALONE!Copy !req
558. I'VE GOT IT! I'VE GOT IT!Copy !req
559. DO YOU WANT
PEANUT BUTTERCopy !req
560. OR SANDWICH SPREAD
FOR YOUR TEA?Copy !req
561. WHAT?Copy !req
562. PEANUT BUTTER!Copy !req
563. I'VE FORGOTTEN IT!Copy !req
564. I HAD IT! I HAD IT!Copy !req
565. DO YOU WANT
PEANUT BUTTERCopy !req
566. OR SANDWICH SPREAD?Copy !req
567. I DON'T CARE!Copy !req
568. OOH! I DON'T KNOW.Copy !req
569. I HAD IT.Copy !req
570. I HAD IT, YOU OLD BAG.Copy !req
571. MEIN LIEBER GOTT!Copy !req
572. WHAT ARE YOU DOING?Copy !req
573. WHAT'S THAT?Copy !req
574. IT'S THE
PLUMBER!Copy !req
575. GOTT IN HIMMEL,
I'M GOING OUT!Copy !req
576. WELL, IF YOU'RE GOING OUTCopy !req
577. DON'T FORGET WE'VE GOT THE
MENDELSSOHNS COMING FOR TEACopy !req
578. SO DON'T FORGET
TO ORDER SOME PIKELETS!Copy !req
579. PIKELETS! PIKELETS!Copy !req
580. SHAKESPEARE NEVER HAD
THIS TROUBLE.Copy !req
581. DO YOU WANT TO BET?Copy !req
582. INCIDENTALLY, IT'S...Copy !req
583. YOU'RE RIGHT!Copy !req
584. INCIDENTALLY,
WHY NOT CALL HIM HAMLET?Copy !req
585. HAMLET! I LIKE,
MUCH BETTER THAN DAVID.Copy !req
586. MICHELANGELO, YOU CAN USE DAVID.Copy !req
587. I WON'T SUE.Copy !req
588. THANKS, BUT I'VE HAD
A BETTER IDEA.Copy !req
589. MICHELANGELO!Copy !req
590. YES, DEAR!Copy !req
591. I'VE HAD ANOTHER SON.Copy !req
592. OH, MY LIFE.Copy !req
593. COMPOSER?Copy !req
594. I WOULDN'T WISH IT ON MY SON.Copy !req
595. HE'S A SENSITIVE BOY, ALREADY.Copy !req
596. I'D RATHER HE WAS A SEWAGE
ATTENDANT OR A RAT CATCHER.Copy !req
597. AHA! RATS AT 42A
KARTOFFELNSTRASSE.Copy !req
598. HEY, MITZI! I'VE GOT TO GO
TO POTATO STREET.Copy !req
599. PUT YOUR GALOSHES ON.Copy !req
600. DEPRESSED BY RATS?Copy !req
601. DO MICE GET YOU DOWN?Copy !req
602. THEN WHY NOT VISIT
COLIN MOZART'SCopy !req
603. RODENT EXTERMINATING
BOUTIQUE?Copy !req
604. RATS EXTIRPATED, MICE PUNISHEDCopy !req
605. VOLES TORN APART
BY COLIN MOZARTCopy !req
606. MUNICH'S LEADING
FURRY ANIMAL LIQUIDATOR.Copy !req
607. YES?Copy !req
608. COLIN MOZART.Copy !req
609. OH, THANK GOODNESS
YOU'VE COME.Copy !req
610. WE'RE HAVING
A TERRIBLE TIMECopy !req
611. WITH THEM
BLEEDING RATS.Copy !req
612. I THINK THEY LIVECopy !req
613. IN HIS STUPID
PIANO ALREADY.Copy !req
614. GET OUT
THE BLOODY PIANOCopy !req
615. YOU STUPID, FURRY,
BUCKTOOTHED GITS!Copy !req
616. GET OUT!Copy !req
617. GOTT IN HIMMEL!Copy !req
618. GET YOUR STINKING TAIL
OUT OF MY FACE.Copy !req
619. SHUT UP!Copy !req
620. SO ANYWAY, BEETHOVEN
WAS RATHER GLADCopy !req
621. WHEN HE WENT DEAF.Copy !req
622. WELL, I WAS
EVER SO GLADCopy !req
623. THEY ABOLISHED
HANGING, YOU KNOWCopy !req
624. BECAUSE THAT BLACK CAP
JUST DIDN'T SUIT ME.Copy !req
625. YES, DO
YOU REMEMBERCopy !req
626. THE GLASGOW
TREASON TRIAL?Copy !req
627. OH, YES, I WORE A BODY
STOCKING ALL THROUGH IT.Copy !req
628. NO, HEN, AT
THE PARTY AFTERWARDS.Copy !req
629. OH, THAT'S RIGHT,
YOU WERE WALKING OUTCopy !req
630. WITH THAT VERY BUTCH
CLERK OF THE COURT.Copy !req
631. THAT'S RIGHT... HE MADE ME
WANT TO TURN QUEEN'S EVIDENCE.Copy !req
632. SPECIALLY
IN THAT ARSON CASE.Copy !req
633. WHAT WAS THE VERDICT?Copy !req
634. THEY PREFERRED
THE BROWN WIG.Copy !req
635. I LOVE THE
SCOTTISH ASSIZES.Copy !req
636. I KNOW WHAT THEY MEANCopy !req
637. BY A REALLY
WELL HUNG JURY.Copy !req
638. OH! GET BACK
IN THE WITNESS BOX.Copy !req
639. YOU'RE TOO SHARP
TO LIVE.Copy !req
640. I'LL SMACK
YOUR LITTLE BOTTY!Copy !req
641. HAVE YOU TRIED THAT
NEW BODY RUB J.P. S USE?Copy !req
642. I HAD A MAGISTRATE
IN BRADFORD YESTERDAY.Copy !req
643. FUNNILY ENOUGH
I FELT LIKE ONECopy !req
644. IN A LUNCHTIME
RECESS TODAY.Copy !req
645. BUT THE ONES
I REALLY LIKECopy !req
646. ARE THOSE VOICE-OVER
ANNOUNCERS ON THE BBC...Copy !req
647. YOU KNOW, AFTER
THE PROGRAMS ARE OVER.Copy !req
648. OH, AYE... COURSE, THEY'RE
BENT AS SAFETY PINS.Copy !req
649. I KNOW, BUT THEY'VE GOTCopy !req
650. "AND NOW A CHOICE OF
VIEWING ON BBC TELEVISION."Copy !req
651. "HERE ARE TONIGHT'S
FOOTBALL RESULTS."Copy !req
652. MMM...Copy !req