Monsters vs. Aliens 1x12

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Dr. Cockroach is split into two personalities by his new teleportation machine.

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1. Male announcer: And now, nickelodeon and dreamworks'

2. Monsters vs. Aliens.

3. - Oh, yeah, it's freaky.

4. - Fellow monsters!

5. Feast your eyes on my latest scientific creation—

6. The teleportation machine.

7. - Teleportation?

8. Didn't this already, like, not work?

9. - Yeah, didn't the aliens say

10. That teleportation is an impossibility?

11. - An impossibility for them

12. Because they lack the vision

13. That comes from having the perfect combination

14. Of "mad" and "scientist."

15. Aloha!

16. - Aloha?

17. Wait, he's going to hawaii,

18. And he didn't take me?

19. That's a muka laka right there.

20. - Guys, what makes you think this is

21. Actually going to work?

22. - Aloha!

23. It also means "hello."

24. And hello,

25. A coconut from hawaii.

26. - I take it back.

27. - Of course, any visionary super genius

28. With a four-digit I.Q. Could have done it.

29. - Whoo-hoo!

30. Bring it, doc.

31. Let's hear that triumphant laugh!

32. - My what?

33. - You know, that—

34. Thing.

35. - Maniacal laughter hardly seems appropriate.

36. Whoo-hoo!

37. Look who just did the blinkin' impossible:

38. Me.

39. What?

40. Shave ice, mate?

41. - Mahalo!

42. - Obviously, there are a few unplanned side-effects.

43. - What a boffin!

44. Are you gonna just bang on about it,

45. Or are we gonna have some giggles, eh?

46. Game on.

47. You three round up the treats and beats.

48. I'll bring the party!

49. You buffoon!

50. Can you not see

51. I am trying to analyze

52. What went wrong with the teleportation device?

53. - Wrong?

54. It's brilliant!

55. I'm as fun as a bag of ferrets!

56. - Uh...

57. So which one is the real one?

58. - Imbecile!

59. You are interfering with my scientific research.

60. - I need this fog machine for my mad party!

61. - Oh, my gosh.

62. The laugh!

63. They're both the real him—

64. Just different parts of him.

65. Guys, the machine split his personality!

66. - So party animal dr. "c" over there got all the "mad"--

67. And I'm doing air quotes here—

68. And smarty-pants dr. "c" got all the "scientist"?

69. - Exactly.

70. - Ooh! You know what else is strange?

71. - Else? - Yeah.

72. Am I the only one that's noticed

73. That there are now two dr. Cockroaches?

74. - Just spitballing here,

75. But what if we teleported you

76. Both at the same time?

77. That might combine the two of you

78. Back into one dr. Cockroach, right?

79. - That is a solid hypothesis,

80. But I have decided it is not in my best interest

81. To be reunited with that buffoon.

82. - Feeling's mutual,

83. Professor pocket protector.

84. - What, are you kidding?

85. The two of you belong together.

86. Literally.

87. - Hardly.

88. - Hey!

89. - Without his barking madness,

90. I can finally accomplish serious scientific work

91. In my laboratory.

92. - One problem, egghead.

93. This isn't your lab.

94. It's my lab.

95. And guess what.

96. It's not a lab at all.

97. It's my party room!

98. Whoo-hoo!

99. Light show!

100. - Get out of my lab!

101. - Get out of my party room!

102. - This is definitely not good.

103. - Hey, you know what I'm realizing

104. The real problem is here?

105. There are actually

106. Two dr. Cockroaches.

107. Anybody else catch that?

108. - Cool it, guys.

109. If you're gonna stay in separate bodies,

110. You need to work this out.

111. - Technically, the lab belongs to both of them.

112. So who gets the boot?

113. - I have an idea.

114. - Yes, that is an idea, b.O.B.

115. - I think it can work.

116. You stay on this side of the line,

117. And you stay on that side.

118. - Ooh! Yes!

119. And that way they can both share the lab.

120. Hey, that is a great idea.

121. - B.O.B., this was your idea.

122. - You drew the—

123. - Racing stripe? Yes.

124. Looks pretty cool, huh?

125. - I guess it is kind of cool.

126. - Pbbt!

127. - Hmm.

128. - I had no idea you could rock out, dr. "c."

129. - Oh, yeah!

130. All systems are a go-go!

131. - For collinear "p" and collinear "r,"

132. The intersections "pr" are determin—

133. Trying to work, thank you!

134. Mwah!

135. - Rock and roll!

136. Party on my side of the room!

137. I can play all night.

138. - Yeah!

139. - Well,

140. Since the ionic reactor

141. Is on my side of the room...

142. - Aww.

143. - You can't stop rock and roll!

144. - Apparently, I can.

145. - Okay, what was that?

146. - Come here, you frighter!

147. - Ooh!

148. Crack! - Ooh!

149. - I totally had my doubts about the stripe.

150. - Yeah! Breakdance!

151. - Hey!

152. Knock it off, you two!

153. - That rapscallion is a menace!

154. - If you could make rainbows shoot out your bum,

155. You'd still be boring.

156. - You know, you'd think having two dr. Cockroaches

157. Would be twice as cool.

158. But it's not.

159. It's like...

160. Only 51/16ths as cool.

161. - Not sure about the math there, buddy, but I get the idea.

162. - We just don't think this whole twin dr. Cockroach thing

163. Is working out.

164. - I concur.

165. What solution are you proposing?

166. - Well, it just feels like there should really only be

167. One dr. Cockroach, you know?

168. - I could not agree more.

169. Will you hold that coupler in place for me?

170. - Sure. So we're on the same page?

171. We'll make one dr. Cockroach again?

172. - Affirmative.

173. - So, um, if I'm catching what you're throwing,

174. You think there should be only one doc "c"?

175. - Yup. - It's less confusing that way.

176. Otherwise, I can't remember which one of you

177. Borrowed money from me.

178. - Oh...

179. It was the other bug-man.

180. I was thinkin' the same thing anyway.

181. So smashing.

182. Let's go back to just one awesome dr. Cockroach.

183. - All right. Cool.

184. Wow. That was easy.

185. - I know, right?

186. - Ahh!

187. - Scientific reason

188. Demands I must destroy you!

189. - Yeah?

190. Well, I'll dance me a jig on your spleen, boyo!

191. - You know, I'm beginning to think

192. That what we meant by one dr. Cockroach

193. And what they meant really aren't the same thing.

194. - Yeah, I'm thinking that too.

195. - Or you know what I'm thinking?

196. Ice cream. Two scoops.

197. One vanilla, one chocolate.

198. Will I have some whipped cream on top?

199. Yes, I'm not an animal.

200. - How 'bout we take care of that first?

201. - Okay.

202. But then right after, ice cream.

203. - Will you dr. Cockroaches knock it off?

204. You're going to end up doing something really—

205. - bad.

206. - danger. Breach in ionic reactor core.

207. Total reactor meltdown in "t" minus 2 minutes 30 seconds.

208. - We need to restabilize the core.

209. Too late. The heat has already melted the hatch shut.

210. - Doesn't matter.

211. Even if we could get in there,

212. Only a cockroach could withstand that much radiation,

213. And he's currently beating the tar out of himself.

214. - Wait!

215. I have an idea.

216. - Is it racing stripes?

217. 'cause we already tried that.

218. - Ow.

219. - Hey, fun dr. "c."

220. You're the only one who can save the day!

221. Forget about the scientist.

222. We need someone mad enough to fix this!

223. - You are loco!

224. This is a scientific problem.

225. We need the boring but sensible dr. "c" all the way!

226. - "t" minus 1 minute and 30 seconds seconds

227. Until total meltdown.

228. - Oh, well.

229. No one is brilliant enough

230. To figure out a way to get into that core in time anyway.

231. - I will adjust the transporter coordinates

232. And beam myself right into the heart of the reactor

233. In order to stabilize the core.

234. - Not if I get there first!

235. - Whole once again.

236. - 17 seconds until full ionic meltdown.

237. - We shall see about that!

238. - 10 seconds until total meltdown.

239. Total meltdown in 9, 8, 7,

240. 6, 5, 4, 3...

241. - A bit of chewing gum

242. And this foil wrapper.

243. - Ionic core stabilized.

244. Reactor meltdown avoided.

245. - Whoo-hoo!

246. Yes, that's right!

247. I did it!

248. - I guess there was one thing

249. Those two had in common the whole time.

250. - An enormous ego.

251. - Bingo.