1. Okay, it looks like
we're all set to go.
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2. The condemned,
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3. Lyle Victor Linkus,
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4. has declined
to make a final statement.
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5. So, at this time,
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6. barring a phone call
from the governor's office,
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7. we will now carry out
the execution.
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8. Yes?
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9. Mmm-mmm.
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10. Mmm-mmm.
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11. I'm sorry, you have
the wrong number.
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12. You have
a good evening yourself.
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13. Okay. Let us proceed
with the execution
of Mr. Linkus.
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14. You can go on.
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15. Go on!
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16. You can execute him.
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17. Okeydoke,
that about wraps it up.
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18. We thank you for coming out.
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19. If you enjoyed
a beverage or snack,
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20. we do ask that you
throw those items away
in the receptacle at—
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21. That's okay, that's all right.
That's normal.
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22. That's just the body
going through
its normal processes.
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23. It's just that
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24. remaining air
that is being expelled.
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25. That is not a scream
so much as it is,
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26. just air rushing past
the vocal cords,
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27. - which are taut
from the cocktail.
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28. That's okay, that's all right.
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29. This is all normal.
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30. That's just a spasm.
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31. The body just spasms
long after death.
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32. We went back and forth
on whether we should put
a window in that room.
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33. If I knew then
what I know now,
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34. I can tell you
I would have voted
against that window.
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35. If I only knew then
what I know now.
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36. Team, looks like you're
headed to Reidsville, Georgia.
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37. Ugh, another
red state mystery.
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38. When are we gonna
get one in LA or New York?
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39. Somewhere with some theater.
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40. Now here's the thing.
Coincidently, I have
business in Atlanta.
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41. So, maybe I can tag along
on this mystery.
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42. What business
do you have in Atlanta?
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43. I have a lady friend
who lives there.
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44. We've been conducting
an online relationship
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45. and she wants
to meet in person.
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46. And, by the way,
she is a lingerie model,
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47. and very rich,
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48. and she's crazy about me.
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49. I don't wanna get ahead
of myself and say "soul mate,"
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50. but this feels like the one.
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51. The dark clouds
are finally partin'.
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52. You're obviously
being catfished, Deezy.
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53. Number one, no, I'm not.
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54. Number two,
what the hell is that?
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55. It's nothing, Deezy.
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56. Now, she sounds like
a wonderful woman
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57. who definitely does exist.
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58. Thanks for the ride, team.
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59. Thank you for giving us
the pleasure of never
seeing you again,
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60. because you're
about to be murdered
in a catfishing scam.
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61. - Take it easy, brother.
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62. Um... Natasha?
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63. A nationwide shortage
of sodium thiopental
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64. has thrown
the capital punishment system
into disarray.
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65. So, wait,
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66. you just come up with
a lethal cocktail on your own,
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67. like you're the mixologist
at the hotel bar
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68. who asks for your number
and never calls
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69. but still charges you $22
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70. for a strawberry
hibiscus margarita
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71. that didn't even get me buzzed?
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72. Exactly, fellow.
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73. Except, not only
did Lyle Victor Linkus
not get buzzed,
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74. he acquired
super-human strength.
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75. And you want us
to find him?
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76. Yes, sir.
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77. He could be anywhere
in the surrounding forest?
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78. Yes, sir.
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79. Okay, I don't have
any other questions.
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80. Uh, I do.
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81. Why didn't you call
the FBI or, like, the Army?
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82. That is a good question,
young man,
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83. and we went
back and forth on it.
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84. And who knows,
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85. maybe this would turn
into one of those
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86. "if I knew then
what I know now" situations.
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87. Like that window.
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88. And these shoes.
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89. Should've got black,
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90. or brown.
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91. But I went with cordovan.
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92. The man said
it goes with everything.
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93. Well, I think
it goes with nothing.
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94. Here, good luck.
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95. I better
get out of this rain.
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96. You know what color
cordovan looks like
when it gets wet?
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97. Dog shit color.
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98. Okay, team, let's go.
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99. Come on, we've got no choice.
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100. Wait a second,
we do have a choice.
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101. Or more precisely,
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102. you have a choice.
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103. If you want us
to enter the forest,
text "FOREST,"
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104. and if you do not want us
to enter the forest
and go home,
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105. text "GO HOME."
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106. We'll give you a moment
to make your choice.
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107. Yup, we got the results.
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108. And the audience wants us to
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109. go home!
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110. Wow, that's surprising.
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111. I would have though they'd
want us to go in the forest,
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112. you know,
"Go, find that murderer..."
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113. You build up a thing,
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114. you know, you think
you'd wanna see that through
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115. but, no, the audience has voted
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116. and we must respect that.
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117. Come on, everybody,
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118. to the mystery mobile.
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119. Damn, I wanted to go in there
and find that guy.
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120. Fight him
in hand-to-hand combat.
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121. The ultimate ending to a show.
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122. I am disappointed in you,
audience.
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123. Mmm!
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124. Oh! Remember,
about a month ago
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125. when we went
to Reidsville, Georgia,
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126. and we were about to go
after that escaped prisoner?
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127. No, remind me again.
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128. That's not important.
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129. Anyway, it says
he came out of the forest
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130. and murdered
a gas station attendant,
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131. stole a vehicle,
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132. was then chased by police
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133. where he drove off a bridge
into a river.
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134. His body was not recovered.
Presumed dead.
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135. Oh, so, it's a happy ending.
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136. Ah, oh, well, except
for that gas station attendant.
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137. But, you know,
that's not, you know,
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138. not really a life, now, is it?
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139. So you're saying that mystery
is officially solved?
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140. Uh, yeah. I guess.
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141. And you saying that's a mystery
that we were involved in
at one point?
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142. Yes, Michael.
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143. Great, I'm gonna have
Deezy invoice for that.
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144. Deezy! Deezy!
Where are you, fool?
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145. I bet he's taking a shit.
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146. Oh, my God!
He must still be in Atlanta!
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147. Okay, what do we do?
Just fan out and start looking?
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148. Looking for the body.
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149. I mean, he's dead.
We haven't heard
from the guy in a month.
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150. Whoever was catfishing him
obviously murdered him.
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151. Probably
his dead body,
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152. probably cut the head off and
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153. where
the head once was.
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154. I bet that's what happened.
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155. Oh, my God. Look!
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156. Deezy.
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157. Oh, man, what, man?
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158. That's not Deezy.
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159. What? Why is he wearing
Deezy's clothes?
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160. Wait, are we 100% sure
this isn't Deezy?
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161. Yung, check his pockets,
see if there're any clues.
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162. Uh, you check his pockets.
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163. Oh, fine. Hi, sir.
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164. Hello. I am going to reach
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165. into your pocket, okay?
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166. Okay, well...
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167. Oh,
I think I feel his wallet.
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168. Stop, stop. Oh.
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169. Get him off me. Michael!
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170. Ugh! You're wet.
Why are you so wet?
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171. Should we do something?
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172. Let's let the audience decide.
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173. For those that want
to let Marquess fight
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174. this urine-soaked
homeless man...
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175. Pigeon!
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176. Dad, do something.
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177. Deezy, Deezy, let him go.
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178. Ugh! My God!
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179. Here.
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180. This says Natasha.
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181. - And it has a phone number.
- Let's call it.
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182. Hello.
- Deezy.
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183. Mike? Oh, thank God.
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184. I can't believe
I'm getting reception.
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185. You gotta help me.
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186. Okay, Deezy, we're coming.
Where are you?
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187. Oh, man. I don't know.
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188. Somewhere in the woods.
I don't know where I am.
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189. - Mike, you gotta hurry—
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190. Oh, damn, the call dropped.
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191. How are we gonna find him?
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192. Easy.
I put a microchip in Deezy
right in the back of his neck.
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193. Right at the base of his skull.
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194. He was asleep
and I just chipped him,
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195. so I always know where he's at.
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196. I did it to all of you.
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197. What on Earth for?
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198. I have abandonment issues.
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199. We're getting close.
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200. Oh, my God.
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201. Are we back in Reidsville?
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202. When were we ever
in Reidsville?
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203. Look, he's off
somewhere to the right.
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204. But turn here.
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205. Deezy, what the hell
happened to you?
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206. Oh, God, it was terrible.
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207. Well, first it was great.
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208. Here, let me tell you
the whole story.
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209. After you guys drove away,
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210. I admit I was a little worried
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211. because I couldn't
find Natasha.
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212. And it was
a seedy part of town.
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213. But then I heard the sound
of cameras clicking.
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214. And I saw her.
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215. She was doing
her lingerie photoshoot.
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216. And they chose the location
for that gritty feel.
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217. Natasha insisted that
I be in it with her.
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218. You know, to spice things up.
We made love on camera.
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219. Oh, my God.
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220. Anyway,
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221. when I went to put
my clothes back on,
they were gone.
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222. I guess someone stole 'em.
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223. But Natasha just bought me
a whole new wardrobe.
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224. I told you she was rich.
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225. We spent the next month
just buying things
and making love.
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226. Natasha was so into me,
she said she wanted me
to meet her parents.
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227. On the way, I realized
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228. I shouldn't show up
empty-handed.
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229. So I asked her to pull over
at a gas station
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230. so I can get
a nice bottle of wine.
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231. I didn't have my wallet
so she gave me her purse.
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232. - Suddenly there was
the most terrifying roar.
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233. And I watched a monster man
kill the gas station attendant
with his bare hands.
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234. Then he jumped
into Natasha's car,
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235. with Natasha still in it.
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236. So I jumped on the roof
as he sped off.
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237. I climbed to the side
to stop him
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238. and he crashed off the bridge
into the river below.
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239. When I came to,
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240. I saw him carry Natasha
into the forest.
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241. I followed his ass,
he keeps her in this cave.
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242. You gotta save her, Mike.
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243. So in other words,
you got catfished.
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244. Come on.
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245. He's in there, Mike.
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246. You gotta fight him,
hand-to-hand combat.
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247. Yeah, just me against this
super-strong maniac killer.
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248. And we're finally gonna get
the ultimate ending
to this show.
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249. Come on out here,
mother—
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250. Hmm, I hope you're hungry
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251. 'cause you're about to get
a knuckle sandwich.
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252. Oh, damn, I forgot
the warden gave me that pistol.
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253. - But how did it go off?
Deezy.
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254. Huh, he wasn't
catfished at all.
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255. Man, I mean, that's crazy.
All I did was this.
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256. Sorry, Deezy.
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