Mike Tyson Mysteries 1x2

1. OH, HEY, YOU MISSED SOMETHING THERE.

2. OH, HEY, YOU MISSED SOMETHING THERE. WHERE?

3. SOMETHING THERE. WHERE? OH.

4. WHERE? OH. MATURE.

5. OH. MATURE. OOH!

6. MATURE. OOH! WHAT'S IT SAY?

7. OOH! WHAT'S IT SAY? JUST "OOOOOOOOOO!"

8. WHAT'S IT SAY? JUST "OOOOOOOOOO!" THIS MYSTERY SOUNDS FUN!

9. JUST "OOOOOOOOOO!" THIS MYSTERY SOUNDS FUN! IT DOESN'T SAY

10. THIS MYSTERY SOUNDS FUN! IT DOESN'T SAY "OOOOO."

11. IT DOESN'T SAY "OOOOO." THOSE ARE ZEROES.

12. "OOOOO." THOSE ARE ZEROES. IT'S AN OLD IBM COMPUTER PUNCH

13. THOSE ARE ZEROES. IT'S AN OLD IBM COMPUTER PUNCH CARD.

14. IT'S AN OLD IBM COMPUTER PUNCH CARD. IT'S WRITTEN IN BINARY.

15. CARD. IT'S WRITTEN IN BINARY. OH, FOR DEAF PEOPLE.

16. IT'S WRITTEN IN BINARY. OH, FOR DEAF PEOPLE. I THINK YOU MEAN

17. OH, FOR DEAF PEOPLE. I THINK YOU MEAN BRAILLE, AND THAT'S FOR BLIND

18. I THINK YOU MEAN BRAILLE, AND THAT'S FOR BLIND PEOPLE, NOT DEAF PEOPLE.

19. BRAILLE, AND THAT'S FOR BLIND PEOPLE, NOT DEAF PEOPLE. SO DEAF PEOPLE HAVE NO

20. PEOPLE, NOT DEAF PEOPLE. SO DEAF PEOPLE HAVE NO LANGUAGE?

21. SO DEAF PEOPLE HAVE NO LANGUAGE? WOW. THAT'S PRETTY SAD.

22. LANGUAGE? WOW. THAT'S PRETTY SAD. Yung Hee: NO, THEY SPEAK WITH

23. WOW. THAT'S PRETTY SAD. Yung Hee: NO, THEY SPEAK WITH THEIR HANDS.

24. Yung Hee: NO, THEY SPEAK WITH THEIR HANDS. LIKE MONKEYS?

25. THEIR HANDS. LIKE MONKEYS? Yung Hee: SORT OF.

26. LIKE MONKEYS? Yung Hee: SORT OF. IT SAYS "HELP ME."

27. Yung Hee: SORT OF. IT SAYS "HELP ME." SOMEONE AT IBM MUST BE IN

28. IT SAYS "HELP ME." SOMEONE AT IBM MUST BE IN TROUBLE!

29. SOMEONE AT IBM MUST BE IN TROUBLE! TIME-OUT, TIME-OUT.

30. TROUBLE! TIME-OUT, TIME-OUT. NUMBER ONE, IF YOU CAN READ

31. TIME-OUT, TIME-OUT. NUMBER ONE, IF YOU CAN READ COMPUTER CODE, IT MEANS YOU ARE

32. NUMBER ONE, IF YOU CAN READ COMPUTER CODE, IT MEANS YOU ARE A ROBOT, AND IF THAT'S SO, YOU

33. COMPUTER CODE, IT MEANS YOU ARE A ROBOT, AND IF THAT'S SO, YOU SHOULD HAVE COME TO ME AND TOLD

34. A ROBOT, AND IF THAT'S SO, YOU SHOULD HAVE COME TO ME AND TOLD ME THAT EARLIER.

35. SHOULD HAVE COME TO ME AND TOLD ME THAT EARLIER. AND NUMBER TWO, WHO IS IT THAT

36. ME THAT EARLIER. AND NUMBER TWO, WHO IS IT THAT NEEDS OUR HELP?

37. AND NUMBER TWO, WHO IS IT THAT NEEDS OUR HELP? Yung Hee: THAT'S THE MYSTERY.

38. NEEDS OUR HELP? Yung Hee: THAT'S THE MYSTERY. AND I'M NOT A ROBOT.

39. Yung Hee: THAT'S THE MYSTERY. AND I'M NOT A ROBOT. IT SAYS "HELP ME," SEE?

40. AND I'M NOT A ROBOT. IT SAYS "HELP ME," SEE? YOU DO NOT NEED TO HIDE

41. IT SAYS "HELP ME," SEE? YOU DO NOT NEED TO HIDE WHO YOU ARE, YANG.

42. YOU DO NOT NEED TO HIDE WHO YOU ARE, YANG. Yung Hee: YANG?

43. WHO YOU ARE, YANG. Yung Hee: YANG? I'M PROUD OF YOU NO

44. Yung Hee: YANG? I'M PROUD OF YOU NO MATTER HOW YOU CHOOSE TO LIVE

45. I'M PROUD OF YOU NO MATTER HOW YOU CHOOSE TO LIVE YOUR LIFE.

46. MATTER HOW YOU CHOOSE TO LIVE YOUR LIFE. LET YOUR FREAK FLAG FLY, R2-D2!

47. YOUR LIFE. LET YOUR FREAK FLAG FLY, R2-D2! BEEP BEEP!

48. LET YOUR FREAK FLAG FLY, R2-D2! BEEP BEEP! TO THE MYSTERY MOBILE!

49. BEEP BEEP! TO THE MYSTERY MOBILE! OH, SHIT, MARQUESS,

50. TO THE MYSTERY MOBILE! OH, SHIT, MARQUESS, LOOKS LIKE YOU MISSED ANOTHER

51. OH, SHIT, MARQUESS, LOOKS LIKE YOU MISSED ANOTHER ONE.

52. LOOKS LIKE YOU MISSED ANOTHER ONE.

53. ONE. Yung Hee: IT'S YUNG.

54. Yung Hee: IT'S YUNG.

55. Yung Hee: IT'S YUNG. HEY, WHAT'S GOING ON

56. HEY, WHAT'S GOING ON HERE?

57. HEY, WHAT'S GOING ON HERE? SORRY.

58. HERE? SORRY. THINGS ARE A LITTLE HECTIC WITH

59. SORRY. THINGS ARE A LITTLE HECTIC WITH THE BIG CHESS MATCH.

60. THINGS ARE A LITTLE HECTIC WITH THE BIG CHESS MATCH. CHESS MATCH?

61. THE BIG CHESS MATCH. CHESS MATCH? OH, I LOVE CHESS!

62. CHESS MATCH? OH, I LOVE CHESS! Yung Hee: REALLY?

63. OH, I LOVE CHESS! Yung Hee: REALLY? I DIDN'T KNOW THAT.

64. Yung Hee: REALLY? I DIDN'T KNOW THAT. YEAH, THAT'S BECAUSE

65. I DIDN'T KNOW THAT. YEAH, THAT'S BECAUSE IT'S A LIE.

66. YEAH, THAT'S BECAUSE IT'S A LIE. ALSO, I LOVE HANGING OUT WITH

67. IT'S A LIE. ALSO, I LOVE HANGING OUT WITH YOU GUYS.

68. ALSO, I LOVE HANGING OUT WITH YOU GUYS. Yung Hee: WHO'S PLAYING?

69. YOU GUYS. Yung Hee: WHO'S PLAYING? GARRY KASPAROV AND DEEP BLUE.

70. Yung Hee: WHO'S PLAYING? GARRY KASPAROV AND DEEP BLUE. DEEP BLUE?

71. GARRY KASPAROV AND DEEP BLUE. DEEP BLUE? ISN'T THAT JAY-Z AND BEYONCé'S

72. DEEP BLUE? ISN'T THAT JAY-Z AND BEYONCé'S KID?

73. ISN'T THAT JAY-Z AND BEYONCé'S KID? THEY MUST BE GOOD PARENTS 'CAUSE

74. KID? THEY MUST BE GOOD PARENTS 'CAUSE I THINK HE'S JUST A LITTLE BABY

75. THEY MUST BE GOOD PARENTS 'CAUSE I THINK HE'S JUST A LITTLE BABY AND HE'S ALREADY GOOD AT CHESS.

76. I THINK HE'S JUST A LITTLE BABY AND HE'S ALREADY GOOD AT CHESS. Yung Hee: DEEP BLUE IS A

77. AND HE'S ALREADY GOOD AT CHESS. Yung Hee: DEEP BLUE IS A COMPUTER.

78. Yung Hee: DEEP BLUE IS A COMPUTER. THEY'VE PLAYED TWICE BEFORE.

79. COMPUTER. THEY'VE PLAYED TWICE BEFORE. KASPAROV WON THE FIRST TIME AND

80. THEY'VE PLAYED TWICE BEFORE. KASPAROV WON THE FIRST TIME AND DEEP BLUE WON THE SECOND.

81. KASPAROV WON THE FIRST TIME AND DEEP BLUE WON THE SECOND. THIS IS THE TIE BREAKER.

82. DEEP BLUE WON THE SECOND. THIS IS THE TIE BREAKER. THEY'RE CALLING IT

83. THIS IS THE TIE BREAKER. THEY'RE CALLING IT "JUDGMENT DAY".

84. THEY'RE CALLING IT "JUDGMENT DAY". "JUDGMENT DAY"?

85. "JUDGMENT DAY". "JUDGMENT DAY"? THAT WAS THE NAME OF MY FIGHT

86. "JUDGMENT DAY"? THAT WAS THE NAME OF MY FIGHT WITH TREVOR BERBICK BACK IN '86.

87. THAT WAS THE NAME OF MY FIGHT WITH TREVOR BERBICK BACK IN '86. I REMEMBER TREVOR WANTED TO CALL

88. WITH TREVOR BERBICK BACK IN '86. I REMEMBER TREVOR WANTED TO CALL IT "THE ULTIMATE JUDGMENT DAY."

89. I REMEMBER TREVOR WANTED TO CALL IT "THE ULTIMATE JUDGMENT DAY." BUT I SAID "ULTIMATE" WOULD

90. IT "THE ULTIMATE JUDGMENT DAY." BUT I SAID "ULTIMATE" WOULD MEAN THERE'S ALREADY BEEN A

91. BUT I SAID "ULTIMATE" WOULD MEAN THERE'S ALREADY BEEN A JUDGMENT DAY, SO WHY WOULD YOU

92. MEAN THERE'S ALREADY BEEN A JUDGMENT DAY, SO WHY WOULD YOU HAVE ANOTHER JUDGMENT DAY?

93. JUDGMENT DAY, SO WHY WOULD YOU HAVE ANOTHER JUDGMENT DAY? IT'S A HAT ON A HAT!

94. HAVE ANOTHER JUDGMENT DAY? IT'S A HAT ON A HAT! WHOA!

95. IT'S A HAT ON A HAT! WHOA! YOU WANTED TO CALL IT THE

96. WHOA! YOU WANTED TO CALL IT THE ULTIMATE JUDGMENT DAY!

97. YOU WANTED TO CALL IT THE ULTIMATE JUDGMENT DAY! AND I SAID IT'S A HAT ON A HAT,

98. ULTIMATE JUDGMENT DAY! AND I SAID IT'S A HAT ON A HAT, AND THEN I HAD TO EXPLAIN TO YOU

99. AND I SAID IT'S A HAT ON A HAT, AND THEN I HAD TO EXPLAIN TO YOU WHAT THE EXPRESSION "HAT ON A

100. AND THEN I HAD TO EXPLAIN TO YOU WHAT THE EXPRESSION "HAT ON A HAT" MEANT!

101. WHAT THE EXPRESSION "HAT ON A HAT" MEANT! "REST IN PEACE,"

102. HAT" MEANT! "REST IN PEACE," TREVOR BERBICK!

103. "REST IN PEACE," TREVOR BERBICK! [ TWINKLE! ]

104. TREVOR BERBICK! [ TWINKLE! ] THANK YOU FOR TEACHING ME THAT,

105. [ TWINKLE! ] THANK YOU FOR TEACHING ME THAT, MARQUESS.

106. THANK YOU FOR TEACHING ME THAT, MARQUESS. JUST DON'T USE IT

107. MARQUESS. JUST DON'T USE IT ON ME.

108. JUST DON'T USE IT ON ME. GO AHEAD. LET 'EM IN.

109. ON ME. GO AHEAD. LET 'EM IN. YES, SIR, MR. WATSON.

110. GO AHEAD. LET 'EM IN. YES, SIR, MR. WATSON. HMM.

111. YES, SIR, MR. WATSON. HMM. I DON'T REMEMBER INVITING

112. HMM. I DON'T REMEMBER INVITING MIKE TYSON, BUT WE NEED ALL THE

113. I DON'T REMEMBER INVITING MIKE TYSON, BUT WE NEED ALL THE CELEBRITIES WE CAN GET.

114. MIKE TYSON, BUT WE NEED ALL THE CELEBRITIES WE CAN GET. GET SOME BUZZ!

115. CELEBRITIES WE CAN GET. GET SOME BUZZ! ANYTHING TO JACK UP THAT STOCK

116. GET SOME BUZZ! ANYTHING TO JACK UP THAT STOCK PRICE!

117. ANYTHING TO JACK UP THAT STOCK PRICE!

118. PRICE! NO, THE ONLY ONE WHO RSVP'd IS

119. NO, THE ONLY ONE WHO RSVP'd IS THAT GAL FROM THAT SHOW ABOUT

120. NO, THE ONLY ONE WHO RSVP'd IS THAT GAL FROM THAT SHOW ABOUT THE POLICEMEN IN THE NAVY WHO

121. THAT GAL FROM THAT SHOW ABOUT THE POLICEMEN IN THE NAVY WHO SOLVE MURDERS — "N.C.S.I."

122. THE POLICEMEN IN THE NAVY WHO SOLVE MURDERS — "N.C.S.I."

123. SOLVE MURDERS — "N.C.S.I." "N.C.I.S."? ARE YOU SURE?

124. "N.C.I.S."? ARE YOU SURE? WELL, I DON'T KNOW HER NAME.

125. WELL, I DON'T KNOW HER NAME. SHE'S THAT BIG 'OL GOTH GIRL.

126. WELL, I DON'T KNOW HER NAME. SHE'S THAT BIG 'OL GOTH GIRL.

127. SHE'S THAT BIG 'OL GOTH GIRL. I DON'T KNOW!

128. I DON'T KNOW! I G-GUESS SHE'S A BIG CHESS FAN.

129. I DON'T KNOW! I G-GUESS SHE'S A BIG CHESS FAN. JESUS!

130. I G-GUESS SHE'S A BIG CHESS FAN. JESUS!

131. JESUS! YES, YOU CAN MEET HER.

132. YES, YOU CAN MEET HER. HELL, I DON'T GOT TIME FOR THIS.

133. YES, YOU CAN MEET HER. HELL, I DON'T GOT TIME FOR THIS. I'M THOMAS WATSON, THE FOUNDER

134. HELL, I DON'T GOT TIME FOR THIS. I'M THOMAS WATSON, THE FOUNDER AND C.E.O. OF IBM.

135. I'M THOMAS WATSON, THE FOUNDER AND C.E.O. OF IBM. NOW GET YOUR GAME FACE ON,

136. AND C.E.O. OF IBM. NOW GET YOUR GAME FACE ON, DEEP BLUE.

137. NOW GET YOUR GAME FACE ON, DEEP BLUE. DON'T FORGET GARRY KASPAROV IS A

138. DEEP BLUE. DON'T FORGET GARRY KASPAROV IS A CHESS GRANDMASTER.

139. DON'T FORGET GARRY KASPAROV IS A CHESS GRANDMASTER. YOU SCREW AROUND AND HE'LL

140. CHESS GRANDMASTER. YOU SCREW AROUND AND HE'LL CHECKMATE YOU BEFORE YOU CAN SAY

141. YOU SCREW AROUND AND HE'LL CHECKMATE YOU BEFORE YOU CAN SAY "BEEP BEEP."

142. CHECKMATE YOU BEFORE YOU CAN SAY "BEEP BEEP."

143. "BEEP BEEP." OH, YOU BETTER WIN.

144. OH, YOU BETTER WIN. AND THAT STOCK PRICE BETTER GO

145. OH, YOU BETTER WIN. AND THAT STOCK PRICE BETTER GO UP.

146. AND THAT STOCK PRICE BETTER GO UP. OR MAYBE YOU'RE THE ONE WHOSE

147. UP. OR MAYBE YOU'RE THE ONE WHOSE MURDER THOSE NAVY POLICEMEN WILL

148. OR MAYBE YOU'RE THE ONE WHOSE MURDER THOSE NAVY POLICEMEN WILL HAVE TO SOLVE.

149. DEEP BLUE, DID YOU JUST SHIT ON MY CARPET?

150. MY CARPET? WHOA!

151. WHOA! I DIDN'T KNOW CHESS MATCHES WERE

152. WHOA! I DIDN'T KNOW CHESS MATCHES WERE SO FANCY.

153. I DIDN'T KNOW CHESS MATCHES WERE SO FANCY. PERHAPS YOU SHOULD

154. SO FANCY. PERHAPS YOU SHOULD HAVE WORN YOUR TUXEDO TRACK SUIT

155. PERHAPS YOU SHOULD HAVE WORN YOUR TUXEDO TRACK SUIT INSTEAD OF YOUR REGULAR TRACK

156. HAVE WORN YOUR TUXEDO TRACK SUIT INSTEAD OF YOUR REGULAR TRACK SUIT.

157. INSTEAD OF YOUR REGULAR TRACK SUIT. ARE YOU BEING CATTY,

158. SUIT. ARE YOU BEING CATTY, MARQUESS?

159. ARE YOU BEING CATTY, MARQUESS? COME ON.

160. MARQUESS? COME ON. YES, SORRY.

161. COME ON. YES, SORRY. I HAVEN'T BEEN SLEEPING WELL.

162. YES, SORRY. I HAVEN'T BEEN SLEEPING WELL. IT'S OKAY.

163. I HAVEN'T BEEN SLEEPING WELL. IT'S OKAY. WHY HAVEN'T YOU BEEN SLEEPING

164. IT'S OKAY. WHY HAVEN'T YOU BEEN SLEEPING WELL?

165. WHY HAVEN'T YOU BEEN SLEEPING WELL? IS IT BECAUSE YOU'RE A GHOST AND

166. WELL? IS IT BECAUSE YOU'RE A GHOST AND YOU CAN SEE THROUGH YOUR

167. IS IT BECAUSE YOU'RE A GHOST AND YOU CAN SEE THROUGH YOUR EYELIDS?

168. YOU CAN SEE THROUGH YOUR EYELIDS? NO, YOU KNOW, I

169. EYELIDS? NO, YOU KNOW, I JUST FIND, I CAN'T TURN MY BRAIN

170. NO, YOU KNOW, I JUST FIND, I CAN'T TURN MY BRAIN OFF AT THE END OF THE DAY.

171. JUST FIND, I CAN'T TURN MY BRAIN OFF AT THE END OF THE DAY. YOU KNOW, I JUST — I LIE THERE

172. OFF AT THE END OF THE DAY. YOU KNOW, I JUST — I LIE THERE WORRYING ABOUT THE DUMBEST

173. YOU KNOW, I JUST — I LIE THERE WORRYING ABOUT THE DUMBEST THINGS.

174. WORRYING ABOUT THE DUMBEST THINGS. IT'S RIDICULOUS, AND THE NEXT

175. THINGS. IT'S RIDICULOUS, AND THE NEXT DAY I'M TIRED AND A BITCH TO

176. IT'S RIDICULOUS, AND THE NEXT DAY I'M TIRED AND A BITCH TO EVERYONE AROUND ME AND — UGH!

177. DAY I'M TIRED AND A BITCH TO EVERYONE AROUND ME AND — UGH! I DON'T KNOW.

178. EVERYONE AROUND ME AND — UGH! I DON'T KNOW. I HAVE TO FIGURE IT OUT.

179. I DON'T KNOW. I HAVE TO FIGURE IT OUT. THAT'S HORRIBLE.

180. I HAVE TO FIGURE IT OUT. THAT'S HORRIBLE. HAVE YOU TRIED SLEEPING WITH A

181. THAT'S HORRIBLE. HAVE YOU TRIED SLEEPING WITH A PAD AND PEN NEXT TO YOUR BED SO

182. HAVE YOU TRIED SLEEPING WITH A PAD AND PEN NEXT TO YOUR BED SO YOU CAN WRITE DOWN THIS STUFF?

183. PAD AND PEN NEXT TO YOUR BED SO YOU CAN WRITE DOWN THIS STUFF? YES.

184. YOU CAN WRITE DOWN THIS STUFF? YES. HM-MM-MM-MM.

185. YES. HM-MM-MM-MM. Yung Hee: GUYS, DO YOU

186. HM-MM-MM-MM. Yung Hee: GUYS, DO YOU REMEMBER WHAT WE'RE HERE FOR?

187. Yung Hee: GUYS, DO YOU REMEMBER WHAT WE'RE HERE FOR? NO.

188. REMEMBER WHAT WE'RE HERE FOR? NO. THE OPEN BAR.

189. NO. THE OPEN BAR.

190. THE OPEN BAR. Yung Hee: WE HAVE TO FIND OUT

191. Yung Hee: WE HAVE TO FIND OUT WHO SENT THE "HELP ME" NOTE!

192. Yung Hee: WE HAVE TO FIND OUT WHO SENT THE "HELP ME" NOTE! OH, WOW!

193. WHO SENT THE "HELP ME" NOTE! OH, WOW! THERE'S GARRY KASPAROV.

194. OH, WOW! THERE'S GARRY KASPAROV. MAYBE HE'S THE ONE THAT

195. THERE'S GARRY KASPAROV. MAYBE HE'S THE ONE THAT NEED HELP!

196. MAYBE HE'S THE ONE THAT NEED HELP! I GOT YOUR NOTE.

197. NEED HELP! I GOT YOUR NOTE. "HELP ME."

198. I GOT YOUR NOTE. "HELP ME." WHAT DO YOU NEED HELP WITH?

199. "HELP ME." WHAT DO YOU NEED HELP WITH? HUH?

200. WHAT DO YOU NEED HELP WITH? HUH? I DON'T NEED HELP!

201. HUH? I DON'T NEED HELP! DO I LOOK LIKE I NEED HELP?

202. I DON'T NEED HELP! DO I LOOK LIKE I NEED HELP? WELL, YOU HAVE QUESTION MARK

203. DO I LOOK LIKE I NEED HELP? WELL, YOU HAVE QUESTION MARK ON YOUR PAJAMAS.

204. WELL, YOU HAVE QUESTION MARK ON YOUR PAJAMAS. MAYBE YOU ARE LOST?

205. ON YOUR PAJAMAS. MAYBE YOU ARE LOST? NO, MAN.

206. MAYBE YOU ARE LOST? NO, MAN. DO YOU NEED HELP?

207. NO, MAN. DO YOU NEED HELP? I-I DON'T UNDERSTAND.

208. DO YOU NEED HELP? I-I DON'T UNDERSTAND. WHY WOULD I NEED HELP?

209. I-I DON'T UNDERSTAND. WHY WOULD I NEED HELP? I DON'T KNOW!

210. WHY WOULD I NEED HELP? I DON'T KNOW! TO BEAT THE COMPUTER MAN?

211. I DON'T KNOW! TO BEAT THE COMPUTER MAN? I NEED NO HELP TO BEAT

212. TO BEAT THE COMPUTER MAN? I NEED NO HELP TO BEAT COMPUTER.

213. I NEED NO HELP TO BEAT COMPUTER. LAST TIME, THEY CHEAT.

214. COMPUTER. LAST TIME, THEY CHEAT. NO MACHINE CAN BEAT ME.

215. LAST TIME, THEY CHEAT. NO MACHINE CAN BEAT ME. I'M A GRANDMASTER.

216. NO MACHINE CAN BEAT ME. I'M A GRANDMASTER. YOU'RE WHAT?

217. I'M A GRANDMASTER. YOU'RE WHAT? I AM A GRANDMASTER.

218. YOU'RE WHAT? I AM A GRANDMASTER.

219. I AM A GRANDMASTER. Yung Hee: DAD!

220. Yung Hee: DAD! WHY ON EARTH DID

221. Yung Hee: DAD! WHY ON EARTH DID YOU DO THAT?

222. WHY ON EARTH DID YOU DO THAT? I'M SORRY, MARQUESS.

223. YOU DO THAT? I'M SORRY, MARQUESS. BUT WHEN I PROMISED TO PUT MY

224. I'M SORRY, MARQUESS. BUT WHEN I PROMISED TO PUT MY FISTS DOWN FOR NO MORE

225. BUT WHEN I PROMISED TO PUT MY FISTS DOWN FOR NO MORE DESTRUCTION ANYMORE, I HAD MY

226. FISTS DOWN FOR NO MORE DESTRUCTION ANYMORE, I HAD MY FINGERS CROSSED FOR TWO

227. DESTRUCTION ANYMORE, I HAD MY FINGERS CROSSED FOR TWO EXCEPTIONS — IF I EVER GOT PUT

228. FINGERS CROSSED FOR TWO EXCEPTIONS — IF I EVER GOT PUT IN A TIME MACHINE, I WOULD

229. EXCEPTIONS — IF I EVER GOT PUT IN A TIME MACHINE, I WOULD DEFINITELY DESTRUCT

230. IN A TIME MACHINE, I WOULD DEFINITELY DESTRUCT ADOLF HITLER, AND THE SAME TIME

231. DEFINITELY DESTRUCT ADOLF HITLER, AND THE SAME TIME FOR IF I EVER CAME FACE-TO-FACE

232. ADOLF HITLER, AND THE SAME TIME FOR IF I EVER CAME FACE-TO-FACE WITH THE GRANDMASTER OF THE

233. FOR IF I EVER CAME FACE-TO-FACE WITH THE GRANDMASTER OF THE KU KLUX KLAN.

234. WITH THE GRANDMASTER OF THE KU KLUX KLAN. HE'S A GRANDMASTER,

235. KU KLUX KLAN. HE'S A GRANDMASTER, NOT A GRAND WIZARD.

236. HE'S A GRANDMASTER, NOT A GRAND WIZARD. OH, MY GOD.

237. NOT A GRAND WIZARD. OH, MY GOD. THEN WHAT THE

238. OH, MY GOD. THEN WHAT THE IS A GRANDMASTER?

239. THEN WHAT THE IS A GRANDMASTER? OH

240. IS A GRANDMASTER? OH GOD, WHAT HAVE YOU DONE?

241. OH GOD, WHAT HAVE YOU DONE? THE MATCH IS ABOUT TO START!

242. GOD, WHAT HAVE YOU DONE? THE MATCH IS ABOUT TO START! WE'RE LIVE STREAMING!

243. THE MATCH IS ABOUT TO START! WE'RE LIVE STREAMING! THE STOCK PRICE, MAN!

244. WE'RE LIVE STREAMING! THE STOCK PRICE, MAN!

245. THE STOCK PRICE, MAN! NOW I GOT TO FIND SOMEONE TO

246. NOW I GOT TO FIND SOMEONE TO PLAY THAT COMPUTER.

247. NOW I GOT TO FIND SOMEONE TO PLAY THAT COMPUTER. Yung Hee: I'LL DO IT.

248. PLAY THAT COMPUTER. Yung Hee: I'LL DO IT.

249. Yung Hee: I'LL DO IT. WHO ARE YOU?

250. WHO ARE YOU? SHE'S MY DAUGHTER.

251. WHO ARE YOU? SHE'S MY DAUGHTER. SHE DON'T LOOK LIKE YA.

252. SHE'S MY DAUGHTER. SHE DON'T LOOK LIKE YA. THAT'S BECAUSE SHE'S A

253. SHE DON'T LOOK LIKE YA. THAT'S BECAUSE SHE'S A ROBOT.

254. THAT'S BECAUSE SHE'S A ROBOT. [ DRAMATIC MUSIC PLAYING, HEART

255. ROBOT. [ DRAMATIC MUSIC PLAYING, HEART BEATING ]

256. Yung Hee: HMM... MMM... UNBELIEVABLE.

257. MMM... UNBELIEVABLE. THE BARTENDER SAYS I'M CUT OFF.

258. UNBELIEVABLE. THE BARTENDER SAYS I'M CUT OFF. WOULD YOU GO ORDER ME A

259. THE BARTENDER SAYS I'M CUT OFF. WOULD YOU GO ORDER ME A MOSCOW MULE?

260. WOULD YOU GO ORDER ME A MOSCOW MULE? I'M NOT GETTING YOU

261. MOSCOW MULE? I'M NOT GETTING YOU A DRINK.

262. I'M NOT GETTING YOU A DRINK. Yung Hee: HMM...

263. A DRINK. Yung Hee: HMM... EH, SCREW THIS.

264. Yung Hee: HMM... EH, SCREW THIS. I GOTTA TAKE A PISS.

265. WHAT THE IS THIS?

266. WHAT THE IS THIS? BOBBY FISCHER?

267. WHAT THE IS THIS? BOBBY FISCHER? WHERE THE HELL IS HIS BRAIN?

268. BOBBY FISCHER? WHERE THE HELL IS HIS BRAIN?

269. WHERE THE HELL IS HIS BRAIN?

270. AHH! WE DID IT!

271. AHH! WE DID IT! WE DID IT!

272. AHH! WE DID IT! WE DID IT! THAT SETTLES IT!

273. WE DID IT! THAT SETTLES IT! COMPUTERS ARE BETTER THAN

274. THAT SETTLES IT! COMPUTERS ARE BETTER THAN PEOPLE!

275. COMPUTERS ARE BETTER THAN PEOPLE! HA-HA!

276. PEOPLE! HA-HA! THE SINGULARITY, BABY!

277. HA-HA! THE SINGULARITY, BABY! Yung Hee: UCH, I MADE A DUMB

278. THE SINGULARITY, BABY! Yung Hee: UCH, I MADE A DUMB MOVE.

279. Yung Hee: UCH, I MADE A DUMB MOVE. DON'T SWEAT IT, HONEY.

280. MOVE. DON'T SWEAT IT, HONEY. ALL THAT ROBOT CAN DO IS PLAY

281. DON'T SWEAT IT, HONEY. ALL THAT ROBOT CAN DO IS PLAY CHESS.

282. ALL THAT ROBOT CAN DO IS PLAY CHESS. YOU CAN DO SO MUCH MORE.

283. CHESS. YOU CAN DO SO MUCH MORE. Yung Hee: DAD, I'M REALLY NOT

284. YOU CAN DO SO MUCH MORE. Yung Hee: DAD, I'M REALLY NOT A ROBOT.

285. Yung Hee: DAD, I'M REALLY NOT A ROBOT.

286. A ROBOT. HEY.

287. HEY. I THINK THAT GUY PUT

288. HEY. I THINK THAT GUY PUT BOBBY FISCHER'S BRAIN INSIDE

289. I THINK THAT GUY PUT BOBBY FISCHER'S BRAIN INSIDE THAT COMPUTER.

290. BOBBY FISCHER'S BRAIN INSIDE THAT COMPUTER. WHAT?

291. THAT COMPUTER. WHAT? YEAH, I'M TELLING

292. WHAT? YEAH, I'M TELLING YOU, THEY GOT A GUY'S BRAIN IN

293. YEAH, I'M TELLING YOU, THEY GOT A GUY'S BRAIN IN THAT THING.

294. YOU, THEY GOT A GUY'S BRAIN IN THAT THING. YOU'RE DRUNK.

295. THAT THING. YOU'RE DRUNK. YEAH. AM I?

296. YOU'RE DRUNK. YEAH. AM I? YES.

297. YEAH. AM I? YES. HMPH.

298. YES. HMPH. GOTTA GET SOMEONE TO OPEN UP

299. HMPH. GOTTA GET SOMEONE TO OPEN UP THAT COMPUTER.

300. GOTTA GET SOMEONE TO OPEN UP THAT COMPUTER. HEY, MIKE!

301. THAT COMPUTER. HEY, MIKE! THAT COMPUTER IS REALLY A TIME

302. HEY, MIKE! THAT COMPUTER IS REALLY A TIME MACHINE, AND INSIDE IT IS

303. THAT COMPUTER IS REALLY A TIME MACHINE, AND INSIDE IT IS ADOLF HITLER.

304. MACHINE, AND INSIDE IT IS ADOLF HITLER.

305. ADOLF HITLER.

306. THANK

307. THANK YOU.

308. THANK YOU. I DIDN'T THINK ANYONE WOULD GET

309. YOU. I DIDN'T THINK ANYONE WOULD GET MY NOTE.

310. I DIDN'T THINK ANYONE WOULD GET MY NOTE. ALL THESE YEARS I THOUGHT SURELY

311. MY NOTE. ALL THESE YEARS I THOUGHT SURELY THERE ARE PEOPLE SEARCHING FOR

312. ALL THESE YEARS I THOUGHT SURELY THERE ARE PEOPLE SEARCHING FOR ME, SEARCHING FOR BOBBY FISCHER,

313. THERE ARE PEOPLE SEARCHING FOR ME, SEARCHING FOR BOBBY FISCHER, BUT THEY NEVER CAME!

314. ME, SEARCHING FOR BOBBY FISCHER, BUT THEY NEVER CAME! GOD BLESS YOU, MIKE TYSON!

315. NOW I CAN REST IN PEACE. [ SPLAT! ]

316. OH WHAT ARE YOU STARING AT?

317. WHAT ARE YOU STARING AT? THERE'S NOTHING TO SEE HERE.

318. WHAT ARE YOU STARING AT? THERE'S NOTHING TO SEE HERE. ARE YOU SERIOUS?

319. THERE'S NOTHING TO SEE HERE. ARE YOU SERIOUS? ADOLF HITLER'S BRAIN IS ON THE

320. ARE YOU SERIOUS? ADOLF HITLER'S BRAIN IS ON THE FLOOR.

321. ADOLF HITLER'S BRAIN IS ON THE FLOOR. WAIT — WAIT A

322. FLOOR. WAIT — WAIT A SECOND.

323. WAIT — WAIT A SECOND. IBM WAS FOUNDED IN 1914.

324. SECOND. IBM WAS FOUNDED IN 1914. SHOULDN'T YOU BE DEAD?

325. IBM WAS FOUNDED IN 1914. SHOULDN'T YOU BE DEAD?

326. SHOULDN'T YOU BE DEAD? SMART GUY, HUH?

327. SMART GUY, HUH? WELL, THEN MAYBE YOU SHOULDA

328. SMART GUY, HUH? WELL, THEN MAYBE YOU SHOULDA KNOWN THAT "IBM" STANDS FOR

329. WELL, THEN MAYBE YOU SHOULDA KNOWN THAT "IBM" STANDS FOR INTERNATIONAL BUSINESS

330. KNOWN THAT "IBM" STANDS FOR INTERNATIONAL BUSINESS MAN-CHINES!

331. INTERNATIONAL BUSINESS MAN-CHINES!

332. MAN-CHINES!

333. CAN YOU DO THAT, TOO?

334. IBM STOCK CONTINUES TO FALL IN THE WAKE OF THE SCANDAL. WHILE THOMAS WATSON WILL FOREVER

335. IN THE WAKE OF THE SCANDAL. WHILE THOMAS WATSON WILL FOREVER BE REMEMBERED AS ONE OF THE

336. WHILE THOMAS WATSON WILL FOREVER BE REMEMBERED AS ONE OF THE GREAT LEADERS IN BUSINESS

337. BE REMEMBERED AS ONE OF THE GREAT LEADERS IN BUSINESS HISTORY, ROBOT THOMAS WATSON HAS

338. GREAT LEADERS IN BUSINESS HISTORY, ROBOT THOMAS WATSON HAS PROVEN A POOR STEWARD FOR THE

339. HISTORY, ROBOT THOMAS WATSON HAS PROVEN A POOR STEWARD FOR THE COMPANY AND THIS MORNING WAS

340. COMPANY AND THIS MORNING WAS VOTED OUT BY SHAREHOLDERS.

341. IN RELATED NEWS, CHESS CHAMPION GARRY KASPAROV HAS DIED.

342. GARRY KASPAROV HAS DIED. THE CAUSE WAS BLUNT FORCE

343. THE CAUSE WAS BLUNT FORCE TRAUMA.

344. TRAUMA. WELL, GANG, ANOTHER

345. WELL, GANG, ANOTHER MYSTERY SOLVED.

346. MYSTERY SOLVED. WHAT ARE YOU

347. WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT, MICHAEL?

348. TALKING ABOUT, MICHAEL? YOU KILLED A MAN!

349. YOU KILLED A MAN! THAT WASN'T THE

350. THAT WASN'T THE MYSTERY, MARQUESS.

351. MYSTERY, MARQUESS. THAT WAS JUST A HAT ON A HAT.

352. THAT WAS JUST A HAT ON A HAT. THAT'S NOT WHAT THAT MEANS,

353. THAT'S NOT WHAT THAT MEANS, MAN!

354. MAN! REST IN PEACE,

355. REST IN PEACE, TREVOR BERBICK!

356. TREVOR BERBICK! [ TWINKLE! ]

357. [ TWINKLE! ] OH, MAN.