1. - Huh?
- Hello.Copy !req
2. Yes, I am aware of the damage,Copy !req
3. and we're working on it.Copy !req
4. Were you aware that we're giving
away a free coffeeCopy !req
5. to anyone inconvenienced
by a Megamind battle?Copy !req
6. - Let me in, Christina!
- Oh, no, no, no!Copy !req
7. We have a very strict
no nuisance policy!Copy !req
8. According to my nuisance detector,Copy !req
9. you're actually the nuisance,Copy !req
10. and your readings
are off the charts!Copy !req
11. - You let me go!
- Congratulations, guys.Copy !req
12. You're both nuisances!
Let him in.Copy !req
13. I— Ah!Copy !req
14. You did that on purpose.Copy !req
15. She's crazy busy
dealing with the peopleCopy !req
16. mad at the damage you caused
playing hero out there,Copy !req
17. so make this quick.Copy !req
18. Ah-chnoo-sance!Copy !req
19. That was not
a real sneeze.Copy !req
20. Roxie, I have some tech
that will help usCopy !req
21. keep Metrocity safer
than a baby in bubble wrap.Copy !req
22. I'm happy you're excited
about your invention,Copy !req
23. but I'm slammed today.Copy !req
24. I swear, I don't think I could
handle just one more thing.Copy !req
25. - Lady Doppler Attention!Copy !req
26. This is an evil weather alert!Copy !req
27. Good morning, Metro City!Copy !req
28. - Ooh! Lady Doppler—
- Shh!Copy !req
29. I have a forecast for today.Copy !req
30. Dark and stormy
over the mayor's office.Copy !req
31. The map says sunshine.Copy !req
32. She always was terrible
at weather.Copy !req
33. And for Roxanne Ritchi,Copy !req
34. the tattletale former reporterCopy !req
35. who got me fired
all those years ago,Copy !req
36. - 100% chance of revenge!Copy !req
37. She's good.Copy !req
38. Hey, just because I'm a hero
doesn't meanCopy !req
39. I've lost my appreciation
for quality treachery.Copy !req
40. She shot lightning at me!
And, yes, I did get her fired.Copy !req
41. But now, I have to arrange
a bodyguard,Copy !req
42. cancel public appearances,
probably build a bunker.Copy !req
43. There, there. Relax your boo-tay
on that ergonomic chair, Roxie.Copy !req
44. Stopping baddies is my bag.
Fear not!Copy !req
45. It's easy for you to say,
"Fear not."Copy !req
46. You're walking around all safe
with a pew-pew ray gun.Copy !req
47. It's more of
a chicka-pow ray gun.Copy !req
48. But, my wits protect this city
more than my weapon.Copy !req
49. Which brings me
to the purpose of my visit.Copy !req
50. - My new gadget.Copy !req
51. Ow!Copy !req
52. (zap)Copy !req
53. Huh? What the?Copy !req
54. I look... like... you.Copy !req
55. - Why do you look like me?
- Switcheroo microchips!Copy !req
56. The hottest new crime-stopping
tech from yours truly.Copy !req
57. And sound like me.
I-I sound like you!Copy !req
58. It's a twist
on the disguise generator.Copy !req
59. Explain any scenario in which
this would be useful.Copy !req
60. It's... great for
a good bamboozlement.Copy !req
61. Can't you just turn it off?Copy !req
62. It's more of a wear-off thing.Copy !req
63. How long does it last?Copy !req
64. - A few days, tops.
- Days?Copy !req
65. I'm the mayor! I have people
waiting to see me now.Copy !req
66. Don't be such a nervous Nadine.Copy !req
67. How hard is it being mayor
of Metrocity?Copy !req
68. First, it's pronounced
Metro City.Copy !req
69. - Second, don't let
the intercom scare you. -Copy !req
70. Christina
Madam Mayor, the gentleman from the parking garage is here.Copy !req
71. Great. He's already upset about
you blowing up his garage.Copy !req
72. Why? The jaywalker's getaway car
was parked there.Copy !req
73. So were a thousand other cars!Copy !req
74. I won't apologize
for being thorough.Copy !req
75. You will do exactly as I say.Copy !req
76. This stays hush-hush.Copy !req
77. If anyone finds out,Copy !req
78. it'll seem like I'm not
in control of the city.Copy !req
79. - And that's the last—
Whoa. Whoa! -Copy !req
80. Oh...
Your head is so big.Copy !req
81. It's like balancing a turkey
on a toothpick!Copy !req
82. You need to find me
a new place to park cars!Copy !req
83. Just park them in the park.
It's right there in the name.Copy !req
84. - I'm allowed to do that?
- I do it all the time.Copy !req
85. It's not like there's
a law against it.Copy !req
86. Roxie-As-Megamind:
There's absolutely a law against it!Copy !req
87. He can't park cars
in the public park!Copy !req
88. Is this thing on?Copy !req
89. - Yes, it's on.
- Huh?Copy !req
90. The things I say under my breath are not for you.Copy !req
91. Roxie-As-Megamind:
Your request is not possible.Copy !req
92. Your request is not possible.Copy !req
93. Roxie-As-Megamind:
Thank you for stopping by.Copy !req
94. Thank you for stopping by.Copy !req
95. Really? That's it? Can I give him a muffin or something?Copy !req
96. - I'd like a muffin.
- No muffin.Copy !req
97. I withdraw my offer of muffins.Copy !req
98. Figures. I had a feeling
you'd do nothing for me.Copy !req
99. If I remember to vote,
It won't be for you.Copy !req
100. Let me tell you something
I learned in the few secondsCopy !req
101. I've been mayor.
People like to hear "yes."Copy !req
102. It's all that "no" stuff
that makes you unpopular.Copy !req
103. No wonder you're stressed out
all the time.Copy !req
104. This should be an easy job.Copy !req
105. The job would be a lot easier
without all of yourCopy !req
106. swing-by-the-seat-
of-your-pants antics.Copy !req
107. Now,
you're attacking pants antics,Copy !req
108. the one sport I'm good at!Copy !req
109. Give me this pew-pew ray gun,Copy !req
110. and I'd do 10 times
the saving you doCopy !req
111. with half the damage!Copy !req
112. Ha! Maybe a 13% reduction.
At most.Copy !req
113. O-Okay... Uh,Copy !req
114. there are more angry people here
who wanna complain to you.Copy !req
115. - Let them in.
- Get rid of them.Copy !req
116. The mayor isn't really
feeling well,Copy !req
117. and we thought maybe
she should rest.Copy !req
118. I've made
a remarkable recovery!Copy !req
119. Christina,
send in the complainers!Copy !req
120. Don't you have to present
Keiko MoritaCopy !req
121. with the Citizen Heroism Award?Copy !req
122. I don't see that here.Copy !req
123. That's because the defender
of the city gives that medal.Copy !req
124. You must be getting
our schedules confusedCopy !req
125. - for no real reason at all.
- You heard the mayor!Copy !req
126. - Playtime is over! Move it!Copy !req
127. - But— But—
- Let's go, let's go! Brilliant retort, as always.Copy !req
128. - Do nothing. Say nothing.Copy !req
129. Ugh, and let her wallow
in the hatred of her citizenry?Copy !req
130. No.
I will make Roxanne RitchieCopy !req
131. the most popular mayor
in Metrocity history!Copy !req
132. Are you speaking
in third person?Copy !req
133. Maybe.
Megamind does it,Copy !req
134. and he's way cooler than you.Copy !req
135. - Roxie-As-Megamind: Metro—AH.Copy !req
136. Metrocity is fortunate enoughCopy !req
137. to have someone
as brave as KeikoCopy !req
138. among its citizens.Copy !req
139. Or ci-tie-zens.Copy !req
140. And let's not forget
the importance of a good mayorCopy !req
141. 'cause you've got one.
She can be overlooked, you know.Copy !req
142. She's really doing
everything she canCopy !req
143. about all the damage.
Or de-mage.Copy !req
144. Anyway, for her braveryCopy !req
145. in helping stop
the Doom Syndicate,Copy !req
146. I present Keiko Morita
with this award.Copy !req
147. - Let's hear it for her,
Metrocity! -Copy !req
148. Roxanne?Copy !req
149. No. I'm Megamind.Copy !req
150. I appreciate you taking timeCopy !req
151. from throwing darts
at the mayor's pictureCopy !req
152. to give me this award.Copy !req
153. He does that?Copy !req
154. Aha! You are Roxanne!Copy !req
155. Okay, okay.Copy !req
156. He tried some
switcheroo tech on me,Copy !req
157. and it's not wearing off.Copy !req
158. And how is that a bad thing?Copy !req
159. Oh, I'd love to be
Megamind for a day.Copy !req
160. Chasing bad guys, zapping stuff
with the pa-pow ray gun.Copy !req
161. Oh, you know what? We should
totally stop some crimes!Copy !req
162. No! I need to get back
to my office.Copy !req
163. He's at my desk,
looking like me,Copy !req
164. and I have to make sure
he doesn't do any mayor stuff!Copy !req
165. You could do that,Copy !req
166. or you could not be
a totally lame personCopy !req
167. and stop some crimes!Copy !req
168. - Yeah, but—
- Hear me out.Copy !req
169. This could also help
Megamind's web channel.Copy !req
170. I need some content where
he's a little more personable,Copy !req
171. and that comes naturally to you.Copy !req
172. Thanks, I get it,
but we shouldn't press our luck.Copy !req
173. - Also, his pants
are really tight. -Copy !req
174. I've got a super-wedgie
going on.Copy !req
175. So sorry I'm late, Sir.Copy !req
176. I was trying to butter toast
with some very cold butter.Copy !req
177. - Oh, it's fine.
- No, it's not!Copy !req
178. I'm a terrible sidekick.Copy !req
179. Oh. Um, you know,
I don't say this enough,Copy !req
180. but I appreciate you.Copy !req
181. Sir? Are you okay?Copy !req
182. - Maybe we should check
your temperature. -Copy !req
183. Officer
Attention, all units. Purse snatching in progress.Copy !req
184. Shall we pursue, Sir?Copy !req
185. Oh, I don't think
that's a very good—Copy !req
186. Dude! You gotta spend time
in Megamind's shoes,Copy !req
187. - see how it feels.
- Uh,Copy !req
188. pretty sure he does
that every day, Keiko.Copy !req
189. I guess this could be a chanceCopy !req
190. to prove that it is possible
to save the dayCopy !req
191. without causing so much
pain-in-the-mayoral-rear damage.Copy !req
192. - Plus, I get to fire the pew-pew ray gun.Copy !req
193. I thought we agreed it was
more of a chicka-pow ray gun.Copy !req
194. Oh, uh, sorry, Sir.
I know you hate this song.Copy !req
195. I don't, actually.Copy !req
196. Just yesterday,Copy !req
197. you said it was the national
anthem of throwing up.Copy !req
198. Well, I've changed my mind.
It's catchy.Copy !req
199. Makes me wanna dance
in my too-tight pants.Copy !req
200. - Turn it up.
- Okay, then!Copy !req
201. - Can I get a "waka waka woo" up in here?Copy !req
202. - Mayor's office.Copy !req
203. You want to place a giant
snow globe in the art district?Copy !req
204. In the middle of the street?
In the middle of summer?Copy !req
205. - I can't think of
a single reason why not! Yes! -Copy !req
206. - You've got the mayor.Copy !req
207. Parking enforcement
is overwhelmed?Copy !req
208. - Well, I say yes
to giving them the day off! -Copy !req
209. Dog lovers wanna hold a rally
in the city square?Copy !req
210. - That's a big yes!Copy !req
211. Cat lovers wanna hold a rally
in the city square?Copy !req
212. The more the merrier!
Y-E-S spells yes!Copy !req
213. Whee!Copy !req
214. I need to hit the gym more!Copy !req
215. Please stop!
I have a rock in my boot!Copy !req
216. Uh-oh. Getting the pukies.Copy !req
217. I'm never gonna
catch this guy.Copy !req
218. Time for old pew-pew!Copy !req
219. - Wh-Whoa! Whoa! Ah!Copy !req
220. Huh?Copy !req
221. - Chum.Copy !req
222. What do you think is the best
setting on this right now?Copy !req
223. You're asking my opinion, Sir?Copy !req
224. He turned down the next block!Copy !req
225. Chum, cut him off!
I need a good ending.Copy !req
226. - Roxie-As-Megamind: Ha, ha!
- Huh?Copy !req
227. - Got you!Copy !req
228. - Oh...Copy !req
229. See ya!Copy !req
230. Woo! What a rush!Copy !req
231. And I have to say, I don't
think we did that much damage.Copy !req
232. - Ooh, we did much damage.Copy !req
233. Now, give us a pose
and a line.Copy !req
234. Um...Copy !req
235. Remember,
I did not do this alone.Copy !req
236. It took all three of us
to stop this purse snatcher.Copy !req
237. He was very fast.Copy !req
238. A Megamind
who takes direction.Copy !req
239. This is a dream!Copy !req
240. Hey-hey!Copy !req
241. You know what is going
to send Roxanne's—Copy !req
242. Uh, I mean my approval ratings
through the roof?Copy !req
243. Showmanship!Copy !req
244. I promise, your next public appearanceCopy !req
245. is going to be electrifying!Copy !req
246. Oh, Megamind.Copy !req
247. Have you always been this
strong, smart, and appealing?Copy !req
248. Thank you for
sending my popularityCopy !req
249. - into the stratosphere!Copy !req
250. Anchor (on TV):
Megamind has been at it again.Copy !req
251. - Citizens are fed up. The meal?Copy !req
252. Megamind's
excessive destruction.Copy !req
253. He turned me
into a bullion cube.Copy !req
254. My doctor says I'm not
supposed to be a bullion cube.Copy !req
255. What in the name
of Darwin's donut?Copy !req
256. - She's ruining my rep! Roxie!Copy !req
257. - Come in.
- I'm here.Copy !req
258. We're just stuck in
some sort of traffic nightmare.Copy !req
259. What exactly have you
been doing out there?Copy !req
260. It's taken a lot of work
to make you popular,Copy !req
261. and you're destroying the city
in my name?Copy !req
262. I am not— Wait.Copy !req
263. What do you mean,
make me popular?Copy !req
264. Have you been mayoring?Copy !req
265. Funny story.Copy !req
266. I might have made
some appearances.Copy !req
267. - Appearances?
As in more than one appearance? -Copy !req
268. And maybe changed
some parking laws.Copy !req
269. Ah!Copy !req
270. Did you approve of that gaudy
art snow globe I kept rejecting?Copy !req
271. Apparently,
people love giant thingsCopy !req
272. where they're not
supposed to be.Copy !req
273. - I don't get it either.Copy !req
274. - Hey, move it!
- Get outta the road!Copy !req
275. I gotta get to work here!Copy !req
276. There's a war
brewing outside, ma'am!Copy !req
277. You said dog rally,
not cat rally.Copy !req
278. Dogs aren't smart enough
to rally!Copy !req
279. This is preposterous.Copy !req
280. Why can't you all get along?
Like cats and dogs!Copy !req
281. We should get you
back inside, ma'am.Copy !req
282. I'm reaping what I've sown.Copy !req
283. Things are coming back
to bite me in the butt.Copy !req
284. - I've created a monster.
And other clichés! -Copy !req
285. - Roxie-As-Megamind:
What's happening? - So, listen. Sure,Copy !req
286. I did some mayoring wrong,
and now they all hate me or you.Copy !req
287. W-We're gonna
have to fix this.Copy !req
288. The people need to hear from
their calm, collected mayor.Copy !req
289. Megamind-As-Roxie:
I don't know how to quell the masses.Copy !req
290. Remember, they're looking
for leadership.Copy !req
291. First, get a podium
in front of you.Copy !req
292. Now, give a speech
that's stern but fair.Copy !req
293. Citizens of Metrocity.Copy !req
294. Start acting civilized
or feel my wrath!Copy !req
295. - No!Copy !req
296. Do not threaten the citizens.Copy !req
297. Oh, good.
Lady Doppler just showed up.Copy !req
298. Didn't you say you'd handle her?Copy !req
299. Sorry. I got distracted
by the whole becoming you thing.Copy !req
300. Good news is
she's after me now,Copy !req
301. so you're it.Copy !req
302. Fine. You calm the mob.Copy !req
303. I think I've spent enough time
in your shoesCopy !req
304. to keep this
weather witch at bay.Copy !req
305. Roxie, they're staring at meCopy !req
306. with their ordinary eyes.
What do I say?Copy !req
307. Megamind! Your girlfriend
shoulda worn a raincoatCopy !req
308. 'cause a blizzard's
coming to City Hall!Copy !req
309. A raincoat for snow?Copy !req
310. Do you even know
what weather is?Copy !req
311. A raincoat for snow?Copy !req
312. Do you even know
what weather is?Copy !req
313. That was for Doppler, not you.Copy !req
314. Hey, Doppler,
here's a forecast for you.Copy !req
315. A butt-kicking front coming in
with a 100% chance of defeat!Copy !req
316. You're getting some great lines in on Doppler,Copy !req
317. but I need great lines, too.Copy !req
318. - Feel my thunder!
- Ah!Copy !req
319. - Oh!Copy !req
320. - Hello? Hello?Copy !req
321. Not ideal.Copy !req
322. You do realize that was
lightning, not thunder, right?Copy !req
323. Catch me if you can.Copy !req
324. We can't let her get
to Megamind!Copy !req
325. She's already
gotten past you, Sir.Copy !req
326. - Way past, in fact.
- Uh, I meant Roxanne.Copy !req
327. - Let's go!Copy !req
328. - Hello? Hello?Copy !req
329. I gotta say something.Copy !req
330. Citizens of Metro... Ci... ty.Copy !req
331. I think you're all wonderful.Copy !req
332. And marvelous! And...Copy !req
333. really cool and stuff.Copy !req
334. - The end. And mic drop?Copy !req
335. Not one more step.Copy !req
336. I got you, Gail.Copy !req
337. Really?Copy !req
338. Womp, womp.
Oh, what happened to you?Copy !req
339. You used to be better than this.Copy !req
340. - Pathetic!Copy !req
341. - Christina: Okay, okay!Copy !req
342. Everyone, just calm down!Copy !req
343. - Ma'am,Copy !req
344. I advise you to open your mouth
and let words come out.Copy !req
345. What would Roxanne do?Copy !req
346. She wouldn't vaporize anyone,
so that's out.Copy !req
347. She would also
say "no" a lot.Copy !req
348. Ollo— Hello.
How's it going?Copy !req
349. - Okay, okay.Copy !req
350. You're mad because
I used to say "no" too much,Copy !req
351. and now,
I've said "yes" too much.Copy !req
352. What I've learned is there's
a time for each of those,Copy !req
353. and now is a "no" time.Copy !req
354. Like no division.Copy !req
355. We can all work together
to make things easier.Copy !req
356. - Eh, I don't know about that.
- She's not wrong.Copy !req
357. What about no fighting?
That's good!Copy !req
358. If you're a dog lover,
don't fight with the cat lovers.Copy !req
359. They're just like you,Copy !req
360. only they prefer
to love an animal that actively hates themCopy !req
361. and goes to the bathroom
in a box in their home.Copy !req
362. The point is,
we're all the same.Copy !req
363. We're all weird, but,
you know, a-a good weird.Copy !req
364. And if we can all imagine
walking in each other's shoes,Copy !req
365. maybe we can learn to appreciateCopy !req
366. and respect
each other's weirdness.Copy !req
367. Then, none of us are weird!
We're just us.Copy !req
368. - Metrocity!Copy !req
369. We interrupt this boring speech
for a weather alert.Copy !req
370. An earthquake's a-comin'!Copy !req
371. An earthquake isn't weather.Copy !req
372. - Why is everybody
on my case today? -Copy !req
373. Roxie is in danger.
Let's go!Copy !req
374. You go.
I'm sure it'll be easierCopy !req
375. to defeat Lady Doppler
without me.Copy !req
376. That doesn't sound
like you, Sir.Copy !req
377. Yeah, we're gonna need
confident Megamind back.Copy !req
378. But my pew-pew ray gun
is busted.Copy !req
379. Pardon my language,
but gun shmun.Copy !req
380. It's your wits that
protect the city, Sir,Copy !req
381. not your weapon.Copy !req
382. Well, as Keiko knows,Copy !req
383. I'm not quite feeling
like myself today.Copy !req
384. But even if you're feeling like,
oh, say Roxanne today,Copy !req
385. you know that Roxanne is
at least as smart as you.Copy !req
386. Huh.Copy !req
387. You're right.Copy !req
388. I am as smart as Roxanne.Copy !req
389. Not sure I understand,
but I agree with the message!Copy !req
390. You're the master
of plans and schemes.Copy !req
391. I'm certain you can
come up with a wayCopy !req
392. to contain
Lady Doppler's weather attack.Copy !req
393. Contain the weather...
That's it!Copy !req
394. The mayor may have been
terrible today,Copy !req
395. but she gave us just the tool
we need to defeat Doppler!Copy !req
396. Plans and schemes!
That's my Sir!Copy !req
397. You're about to lose
in a landslide!Copy !req
398. That's clearly a tornado.Copy !req
399. And again, landslide?
Not weather!Copy !req
400. I'm exhausted
correcting this woman.Copy !req
401. Aw, unfortunately, there's
no time for an official recall.Copy !req
402. Let's just skip to the part
where you're ousted!Copy !req
403. Looks like the sky
is clearing up.Copy !req
404. Didn't I already defeat you?Copy !req
405. You destroyed my gun,
not my mind.Copy !req
406. Nothing a change
in weather pattern can't fix.Copy !req
407. Ah!Copy !req
408. Chum! Snow globe!Copy !req
409. Yes!Copy !req
410. I think I'm gonna be sick!Copy !req
411. Doppler out.Copy !req
412. That's a wrap, everybody!Copy !req
413. Outstanding work.Copy !req
414. Specifically the saving me part.Copy !req
415. I even had a cool line!Copy !req
416. Looks like the sky
is clearing up!Copy !req
417. Megamind! Megamind! Megamind!Copy !req
418. It sounds so beautiful.Copy !req
419. Like angels.Copy !req
420. You calmed them down
all on your own.Copy !req
421. That's great.Copy !req
422. They were chanting
your name earlier, I swear.Copy !req
423. Looks like Metrocity
loves us both once again.Copy !req
424. Bring it in, team.Copy !req
425. I love this new
in-touch-with-your-feelings Sir.Copy !req
426. Let's not get too used to it.
Maybe just special occasions.Copy !req
427. Thank you!Copy !req
428. Now, I hate to be
a "mayor downer..."Copy !req
429. Get it? Like major—
Never mind.Copy !req
430. Parking rules are back in effect
and fines will be doubled.Copy !req
431. - I gotta move my car!
- I can't afford a ticket!Copy !req
432. Thanks for the opportunity, Sir.Copy !req
433. - From now on,
this song will be ours. -Copy !req
434. No, no, no, no.
Not the national anthem of throwing up!Copy !req
435. - Your ever-changing personality remainsCopy !req
436. a wonderful mystery to me, Sir.Copy !req