1. - Huh?
- Hello.Copy !req
2. What up! And welcome toCopy !req
3. Megamind's Guide
to Defending Your City!Copy !req
4. I'm Keiko Morita
in the Casita del Megamind.Copy !req
5. Today, the blue guy himself
is gonna give usCopy !req
6. an insider peek
of his heroic lair.Copy !req
7. Yes! Welcome! Today,Copy !req
8. - we'll be live screaming
from inside my— - Keiko: Psst!Copy !req
9. It's live "streaming."Copy !req
10. Today, I'll be live streamingCopy !req
11. from inside
my super-secret abode.Copy !req
12. So much cool stuff.
Check it out!Copy !req
13. This first gizmo
is a particle colliderCopy !req
14. that can atomize anything.Copy !req
15. But it also doubles
as a gelato maker.Copy !req
16. Over here, we have
a time destabilizer.Copy !req
17. That's extremely dangerous,Copy !req
18. - so it's more of
a conversoshon piece. -Copy !req
19. And over, here we have
a horrifying garbage monsterCopy !req
20. that I quite honestly
don't remember creating.Copy !req
21. - Whoa!Copy !req
22. Oh, hang on! That's just
my heroic assistant, Chum!Copy !req
23. Smile for the camera,
Chumberto!Copy !req
24. - Hello.
- Chum keeps everything running in tip-top shape,Copy !req
25. which is important because
safety is priority number one.Copy !req
26. - Ah! Whoa!
- Look out!Copy !req
27. Phew!Copy !req
28. Grab me some bait and a hookCopy !req
29. because those unstable isotopes
almost went fission!Copy !req
30. Anyway, don't forget
to like and prescribe.Copy !req
31. And cut!Copy !req
32. Great.
Wrap that in a tortillaCopy !req
33. 'cause fans are gonna eat it up!Copy !req
34. Oh...Copy !req
35. May I have a word, sir?Copy !req
36. Make it quick, Chum.
Keiko and I are onternetting.Copy !req
37. About that, sir.Copy !req
38. Ever since Keiko
started working here,Copy !req
39. there has been
an overabundance of—Copy !req
40. New subscribers
to my web channel?Copy !req
41. - No.
- Unflinching respect and admiration?Copy !req
42. - No.
- Pop culture referencesCopy !req
43. we both just pretend
to understand?Copy !req
44. Trash, sir.
I was going to say trash.Copy !req
45. It's because I have no idea
where the trash can is.Copy !req
46. Figured you guys
just played it loose here.Copy !req
47. Trash starts with a T,Copy !req
48. so it's located
in the south wingCopy !req
49. next to the gumball machine,Copy !req
50. a "treat,"
which also starts with T.Copy !req
51. I mean, how hard
is that to understand?Copy !req
52. Why can't we just keep
a trash bin right here,Copy !req
53. where we spend
the majority of our time?Copy !req
54. Because we have
never done it that way.Copy !req
55. I get that I'm the newb
on the team,Copy !req
56. but your system makes,
like, zero sense.Copy !req
57. I don't even have a place
to put my stuff!Copy !req
58. Well, if I'm being
perfectly honest,Copy !req
59. it's been a big adjustment
having you here all the time.Copy !req
60. I had no idea kids
ate so much.Copy !req
61. It's called metabolism.Copy !req
62. If I don't feed the beast,
he gets loco.Copy !req
63. At least take a bowl
with your granola.Copy !req
64. Or if you'd like,
I can get you a feed bag!Copy !req
65. Weird, but I'm not saying
no to the feed bag idea.Copy !req
66. You know, crumbs can lead
to all sorts of problems.Copy !req
67. We have a lot of
sensitive equipment in here!Copy !req
68. - Okay, I'll throw it out.
- No, I'll throw it out.Copy !req
69. - Give... it... ah!
- Ah!Copy !req
70. Oh, look what you've done!Copy !req
71. - What I've done?
- Megamind: Just clean up the mess, Chum.Copy !req
72. Keiko and I are about
to film another segment.Copy !req
73. Whenever I have a question,
I seek the counselCopy !req
74. of the handsomest
and wisest person I know.Copy !req
75. Myself!Copy !req
76. And now, so can you
lucky rapscallions!Copy !req
77. Time for fan mail!
Brainbot?Copy !req
78. Number one fan
Terry Sasko writes,Copy !req
79. "Dear Megamind, what does it
take to become a superhero?"Copy !req
80. - Well, Terry, becoming a hero
requires a great deal of— -Copy !req
81. Chum!Copy !req
82. Sorry!
The mega-vac shorted out.Copy !req
83. Someone must have vacu-dried
their capes again.Copy !req
84. There's, like, 20 in here.Copy !req
85. O-Oh, sir? Would you mind
throwing the circuit breaker?Copy !req
86. Oh, now where was I?
Ah, yes!Copy !req
87. To be a superhero,
one must be fashionable,Copy !req
88. punctual, and utterly brave
in any situation,Copy !req
89. no matter how
terrifying—Copy !req
90. Ew, gross. Are you okay?Copy !req
91. Me? Yes, of course!Copy !req
92. It's not like
I'm irrationally terrifiedCopy !req
93. that those roaches
will encase me with gooCopy !req
94. and take me to their queenCopy !req
95. and torture me with
their ickiness for all eternity!Copy !req
96. Okay, that's really specific.Copy !req
97. Ah! There's a lot more of them!Copy !req
98. - What is going on?Copy !req
99. Megamind saw a roach
and freaked.Copy !req
100. I'm not freaked!
I just wanted to knowCopy !req
101. what it'd feel like
to be Chum's backpack.Copy !req
102. Okay, they are getting
way too close!Copy !req
103. I warned you about those crumbs.Copy !req
104. Sir!
Feel free to let Keiko knowCopy !req
105. how disappointed
you are with her.Copy !req
106. Uh, sir?Copy !req
107. Still not freaked!
Just love a good sprint!Copy !req
108. - Chum? Keiko?Copy !req
109. I am speaking to you
from insideCopy !req
110. my titanium-reinforced
"I Never Panic Room,"Copy !req
111. where literally
nothing can harm me.Copy !req
112. I'm going to need
the two of you to take downCopy !req
113. every single one of
those vile creaturesCopy !req
114. that I am
in no way frightened of!Copy !req
115. Sir, this is all
Keiko's fault!Copy !req
116. - What?
- Megamind: You both are responsibleCopy !req
117. for this horrific
breach of security.Copy !req
118. Meanwhile, I won't be leaving
until those roaches are gone.Copy !req
119. But not because I'm scared.Copy !req
120. I just think this will beCopy !req
121. a good team-building exercise.Copy !req
122. - Okay, bye!Copy !req
123. This way to
the roach repellent,Copy !req
124. which is exactly where I know
it is because I put it there.Copy !req
125. Yeah, I was thinkingCopy !req
126. I know another way
I could help around here.Copy !req
127. You know, organize things in
a way that actually makes sense.Copy !req
128. Please.Copy !req
129. I'm all about organization.
You're an agent of chaos.Copy !req
130. Okay, Chum. Lately, there's
been this weirdness between us.Copy !req
131. Like you don't want me here.Copy !req
132. That's absurd.
Just because you and sirCopy !req
133. spend all your free time
laughing and making fun videosCopy !req
134. while I'm always
on cleanup duty,Copy !req
135. why would I not want you here?Copy !req
136. Are you jealous?Copy !req
137. Is that what
this is all about?Copy !req
138. You think I'm gonna
take over your spot?Copy !req
139. There's only room for one
number two around here,Copy !req
140. and that's me.Copy !req
141. I'm a big number two!Copy !req
142. Did sir make you
your own pet parakeet? Ka-kaw!Copy !req
143. I love you, too, Polly 227.Copy !req
144. Because you're
a cutie-wootie cuckoo birdCopy !req
145. who doesn't try to usurp people.Copy !req
146. Sir trusts me
because only I knowCopy !req
147. the ins and outs
of this lair.Copy !req
148. I've even developed a highly
sophisticated lettering system,Copy !req
149. so I always know where
everything is at all times.Copy !req
150. - You mean
an alphabetical system? - Yes, alphabetical.Copy !req
151. But then, you grab
the third bottle to the left,Copy !req
152. switch the middle and the third
back and forth three times,Copy !req
153. and voilà!
Couldn't be simpler.Copy !req
154. Wait!
You're holding a can of—Copy !req
155. Couldn't be simpler!Copy !req
156. Intelligence booster?Copy !req
157. Yeah, that's gonna
be a problem.Copy !req
158. No need to panic. No roaches can
get in here.Copy !req
159. You're protected by
a titanium steelCopy !req
160. cobalt-reinforced
level-seven doorCopy !req
161. with Corinthian security liningCopy !req
162. designed to keep Behemoth
himself from breaking in.Copy !req
163. German Voice:
Why break inCopy !req
164. when you can just walk under?Copy !req
165. Chum, Keiko,
funny story.Copy !req
166. There's a roach in here,
and it's talking!Copy !req
167. - Ah!
- That's right!Copy !req
168. Your simpleton assistant sprayed
me with an intelligence booster,Copy !req
169. and now, I'm a super genius,Copy !req
170. just like you!Copy !req
171. Ah! I beg you!Copy !req
172. Stay away, hideous creature!Copy !req
173. Hideous creature?
It has a ring to it.Copy !req
174. But I prefer you
call me Rochelle!Copy !req
175. Please, Rochelle!
Don't come any closer!Copy !req
176. Most people
are repulsed by me.Copy !req
177. - This is nothing new.Copy !req
178. But in you,
I sense unbridled fear.Copy !req
179. Tell me, where exactly does
this fear come from?Copy !req
180. I won't tell you a thing!Copy !req
181. My painful childhood stories
are my own!Copy !req
182. So, it goes back to childhood.Copy !req
183. Blast it!
Get out of my giant blue head!Copy !req
184. What do you want, anyway?Copy !req
185. For too long,
we roaches have beenCopy !req
186. at the very bottom
of the food chain,Copy !req
187. treated like nothing moreCopy !req
188. than the disgusting refuse
we've been forced to consume.Copy !req
189. We want revenge!Copy !req
190. - Don't you mean revonge?
- No, it's revenge.Copy !req
191. I just learned
this language today.Copy !req
192. - How do I speak it
better than you? -Copy !req
193. You're just a little,
totally not scary bug.Copy !req
194. What kind of evil plan
could your tiny brain hatch up?Copy !req
195. I'm going to use your sprayCopy !req
196. to make an army of super-evil
intelligent roaches.Copy !req
197. We'll take over the city.Copy !req
198. Then, the world!Copy !req
199. That's actually
a pretty airtight evil plan.Copy !req
200. - No notes.Copy !req
201. Attention!
I, Rochelle,Copy !req
202. hereby assume control
of this lair.Copy !req
203. And I order youCopy !req
204. to hand over the intelligence
booster immediately!Copy !req
205. And if we refuse?Copy !req
206. Then, I will do the backstrokeCopy !req
207. in Megamind's favorite
coffee mug!Copy !req
208. - We'll buy him a new mug!
- Stop playing with Sir's life!Copy !req
209. I'm stalling until we can figure out what to do!Copy !req
210. If that is not enough,
I shall shed my exoskeletonCopy !req
211. and deposit it in his shoe!Copy !req
212. - Oh yeah? Well,
we'll buy him new feet! - Huh?Copy !req
213. If you do not hand me the spray,
I shall scurryCopy !req
214. all over Megamind's
pathetic blue face!Copy !req
215. Hand her the spray
immediately!Copy !req
216. - Right away, Sir.
- Chum! That's the fear talking!Copy !req
217. We can't let her send an armyCopy !req
218. of tiny bug villains
out into the world!Copy !req
219. Sir is my world.Copy !req
220. She'll turn him
into a quivering,Copy !req
221. mentally scarred
puddle of jelly!Copy !req
222. Keiko, as the number one
number two around here,Copy !req
223. I am insisting that
we hand over the can.Copy !req
224. Dude, no way we are
handing over this can!Copy !req
225. - I'll let go if you let go!
- Give it...Copy !req
226. Time to add some fuel
to the fire.Copy !req
227. - Look at you, Megamind.Copy !req
228. Too scared to lift a pinky
to save your friends.Copy !req
229. Please don't drag
my pinky into this.Copy !req
230. It's been through
so much already.Copy !req
231. If one smart roach
is able to do this,Copy !req
232. imagine what a bunch more
could do to the city.Copy !req
233. - If he wasn't totally freaking out,Copy !req
234. Megamind would want us
to stop her, no matter what!Copy !req
235. Okay, then I'll just
crush the can.Copy !req
236. Are you crazy?Copy !req
237. I'll just release the spray
into the air!Copy !req
238. Give it to me!
I'll throw it in the incinerator.Copy !req
239. That will be worse!
It'll release it into the entire city!Copy !req
240. There has to be something
in this placeCopy !req
241. that can destroy a spray can.Copy !req
242. But we can't
just destroy it.Copy !req
243. We have to atomize it.Copy !req
244. The particle collider!Copy !req
245. - Whoa!Copy !req
246. Whoa! Chum, catch!Copy !req
247. Your two companions have proven to be most troublesome.Copy !req
248. And that is
trouble for you.Copy !req
249. - What are you
gonna do to me? - Quiet!Copy !req
250. - Order your friends
to obey me! -Copy !req
251. Ow! How are you so strong?Copy !req
252. This'll zap it into atomic dust!Copy !req
253. Okay. It's loading up...Copy !req
254. - Wait for it...Copy !req
255. Still loading...Copy !req
256. And... here we go.Copy !req
257. - Hazelnut?
- My bad! Had it set for gelato.Copy !req
258. They got the can. You guys
are really starting to bug me!Copy !req
259. Pun intended!
Throw me, Chum!Copy !req
260. I knew that trash would come in handy!Copy !req
261. Whoa!Copy !req
262. To the time destabilizer!Copy !req
263. If we can't destroy it,
maybe we can send it backCopy !req
264. - to the Stone Age!Copy !req
265. - Yes!Copy !req
266. Got rid of it just
in the nick of "time."Copy !req
267. You see what I did there?
Because we just—Copy !req
268. You sent it two seconds
into the future!Copy !req
269. Ooh. Think of all the things
that can has seen.Copy !req
270. Let loose that
caboose, Chum!Copy !req
271. They're gaining on us!Copy !req
272. We could really use
a set of wings right now.Copy !req
273. I've got just the thing.
Ka-kaw!Copy !req
274. Fly, brave parakeet!Copy !req
275. Away!Copy !req
276. - Ka-kaw!Copy !req
277. - Kaw...Copy !req
278. I guess we should've opened
the skylight first.Copy !req
279. Okay, we are officially
terrible at this.Copy !req
280. I'm goin' for it.Copy !req
281. This is like wearing a sweaterCopy !req
282. made of toenail clippings!Copy !req
283. Ha, there's more
where that came fromCopy !req
284. if you can't convince your
friends to hand over the spray!Copy !req
285. No! I-I won't do it.Copy !req
286. You may have tapped
into my darkest fears,Copy !req
287. but you're going to have to find
someone else to be your puppet.Copy !req
288. Oh. Not a bad idea.Copy !req
289. - If I cannot puppet you...Copy !req
290. then I will assume control
of your robot gorilla!Copy !req
291. Control Chum?Copy !req
292. That's my job, you monster!Copy !req
293. Easy does it.
Grab the can, save the day.Copy !req
294. Almost...Copy !req
295. Got it!Copy !req
296. Hey! I walk with those!Copy !req
297. Whoa! Chum!
What are you doing?Copy !req
298. I-I'm not doing this!Copy !req
299. Kinda feels like
you're doing it!Copy !req
300. - Rochelle say, monkey do!Copy !req
301. Foul beast!
This is madness.Copy !req
302. Stop me, if you dare!Copy !req
303. Just reach out your hand
and swat me away.Copy !req
304. Come on...
Swat, you cowardly paw! Swat!Copy !req
305. Do this, and I promise
to start moisturizing.Copy !req
306. Swat!Copy !req
307. So much for Metro City's
greatest hero, eh?Copy !req
308. Time to pump up the volume!Copy !req
309. - Keiko: Whoa! Chum, let me go!Copy !req
310. Whoa! I'm afraid
that's impossible.Copy !req
311. Rochelle hacked
into my mainframe!Copy !req
312. How do we stop it?Copy !req
313. Uh, the override button!
On the main console!Copy !req
314. Of course,
it's way down there!Copy !req
315. I'm going to dance this monkeyCopy !req
316. - right over the edge!Copy !req
317. Okay, Rochelle.Copy !req
318. You wanna know why
I'm afraid of cockroaches?Copy !req
319. Yes! Tell me. Tell me!Copy !req
320. I was but a child,
growing up in prison.Copy !req
321. I didn't have much, but I was
a highly resourceful young lad,Copy !req
322. repurposing
whatever I could find around the cellblock.Copy !req
323. One day, I decided to craft
a comfy beddy-bye pillowCopy !req
324. out of a bag of
discarded ham sandwiches.Copy !req
325. That night,
the ham-scented pillowCopy !req
326. attracted every roach
in the prison.Copy !req
327. I awoke to find the bugs
using my face as a dining hallCopy !req
328. at a nightmarish all-you-can-eat
ham sandwich buffet!Copy !req
329. Sometimes, I can still feel
their tiny roach feetCopy !req
330. dancing all over my face!Copy !req
331. - The horror.Copy !req
332. So you are the famous ham boy.Copy !req
333. For generations, cockroaches
have told the tale of a boyCopy !req
334. who did something so stupid
that it ledCopy !req
335. to the greatest feast
our people have ever known!Copy !req
336. And here you are,
still that scared,Copy !req
337. stupid little ham boy.Copy !req
338. Such a tragic story.Copy !req
339. Also, a distractingly long one.Copy !req
340. Wha?Copy !req
341. - Bullseye!Copy !req
342. - Rochelle: Nein!Copy !req
343. You did it!
I'm rebooting!Copy !req
344. Oh! Sorry!Copy !req
345. Rebooted!Copy !req
346. Thanks. That's one mess
I'm glad I didn't make today.Copy !req
347. The can is ours!Copy !req
348. Your distraction was
all for naught. We've won!Copy !req
349. And it's all thanks
to your pathetic fear!Copy !req
350. Well done, my kinderroaches.Copy !req
351. Now, who needs a boost...Copy !req
352. - of intelligence?Copy !req
353. What is the value
proposition here?Copy !req
354. A bouquet really
brightens up a foyer.Copy !req
355. I love math.Copy !req
356. Welcome to the next phaseCopy !req
357. in roach evolution!Copy !req
358. Yesterday, we were
living off humanity's scraps.Copy !req
359. Tomorrow, they will be
living off of ours!Copy !req
360. When we control the food,Copy !req
361. we control the world!Copy !req
362. Gotta hand it to her.Copy !req
363. That's a pretty airtight
evil plan. No notes.Copy !req
364. This is all on me.Copy !req
365. None of this woulda happened
if I wasn't such a slob.Copy !req
366. To be fair, I'm the one
who grabbed the wrong spray.Copy !req
367. You tried to warn me,
but I didn't listen.Copy !req
368. You were right.
I was jealous.Copy !req
369. Aw, come on.Copy !req
370. The last thing I wanna do
is replace you.Copy !req
371. I admire you.Copy !req
372. You and Megamind
have been togetherCopy !req
373. like, forever.Copy !req
374. That's why I feel like
I need to prove myself.Copy !req
375. Otherwise,
I'm just a third wheel.Copy !req
376. I think you've proved today
you're not a third wheel, Keiko.Copy !req
377. - You're a kickstand.
- Huh?Copy !req
378. Because without you,
we would've fallen right over.Copy !req
379. Aw...Copy !req
380. Kudos, you two,
for working out your differences.Copy !req
381. But there's still the wholeCopy !req
382. end of the world thing
to deal with.Copy !req
383. - So many roaches.Copy !req
384. I-I'm sorry. What were
we just talking about?Copy !req
385. - Roaches?
- Yes, of course.Copy !req
386. - Move out, roach regime!Copy !req
387. Victory awaits!Copy !req
388. We cannot let
these things get out.Copy !req
389. There's no stopping them now.Copy !req
390. There's got to be
something more we can do.Copy !req
391. If only this roach phobia
didn't leave meCopy !req
392. totally grossed out by all
the little tiny arms and legs.Copy !req
393. All due respect, Mega,Copy !req
394. but maybe you just
need to suck it up!Copy !req
395. Suck it up?
Keiko, you're brilliant!Copy !req
396. - I am?
- The Power Vac!Copy !req
397. - It'll just take a minute!Copy !req
398. - Or two!
- I'll try and buy you some time.Copy !req
399. Hey! Who wants some juicy,
delicious garbage?Copy !req
400. - Aah, an amuse-bouche!
- The temptation is undeniable!Copy !req
401. Yeah,
I could eat!Copy !req
402. No, no, no!
Resist your instincts!Copy !req
403. Why eat garbage when you
can have filet mignon?Copy !req
404. - That's right. Follow me!Copy !req
405. Whoa!Copy !req
406. Wow!
You guys really are smart!Copy !req
407. Chum, can you hurry it up?
They are getting really hangry!Copy !req
408. Whoa!Copy !req
409. Almost there.
I just need a crescent wrench.Copy !req
410. Okay, they're made of iron,
so that must mean I put it inCopy !req
411. - the...
- The ironing closet!Copy !req
412. Yes! That's it, Keiko!
Everything has its place!Copy !req
413. - Yeah!Copy !req
414. Uh-oh. Whoa! Whoa!Copy !req
415. - My babies!Copy !req
416. - You are liberated!Copy !req
417. - Now, onward to Metro City!Copy !req
418. Schnell, schnell!Copy !req
419. Sir, we need
the power back on!Copy !req
420. - Throw the circuit breaker!
- Right! On it!Copy !req
421. - Oh dear.Copy !req
422. - Throw the switch, Sir!
- Come on! You can do it!Copy !req
423. Oh! I can't do it!Copy !req
424. Ha! You have failed again,
Megamind!Copy !req
425. If just one of those things
gets out, it's game over.Copy !req
426. How do we snap him out of this?Copy !req
427. If Megamind won't listen to us,
maybe he'll listenCopy !req
428. to the handsomest
and wisest person he knows.Copy !req
429. - Ka-kaw!Copy !req
430. - To be a superhero,Copy !req
431. one must be
fashionable, punctual,Copy !req
432. and utterly brave
in any situation.Copy !req
433. Earlier today me is right!Copy !req
434. You cannot win.
Look at you!Copy !req
435. Still just a scared
little ham boy.Copy !req
436. No.Copy !req
437. I'm a scared little ham man!Copy !req
438. - Go, Chum!Copy !req
439. Way to get all housekeeper
on their thoraxes, Chum!Copy !req
440. Nein! Nein! Nein...Copy !req
441. - Yeah!
- Sir, that was amazing!Copy !req
442. - Ah! You did it!
- Yes, yes! We all did it!Copy !req
443. Ew, icky, icky, ick, ick, ick!Copy !req
444. You have not heard
the last of—Copy !req
445. Yeah, I think we've heard
enough for one day.Copy !req
446. - In three, two, one.Copy !req
447. - Granola?
- More like gra-yes-la.Copy !req
448. I'll try to watch my crumbs.Copy !req
449. That's okay, Keiko.Copy !req
450. I think we've learned
both order and chaosCopy !req
451. have their place in the world.Copy !req
452. And now, so do you.Copy !req
453. A place to put my stuff!Copy !req
454. With my very own trash can?
No way!Copy !req
455. Hopefully, that's the last we'll see of RochelleCopy !req
456. and her brood.Copy !req
457. So, uh, where are they headed?Copy !req
458. All the way to
Proxima Centauri B.Copy !req
459. A planet fit for a roach.Copy !req
460. Honestly, I think I was far
too kind sending them there.Copy !req
461. What? He sent usCopy !req
462. to a garbage planet?Copy !req
463. Mark my words, Megamind.Copy !req
464. The roaches will have
their revonge!Copy !req
465. Now he's got me doing it.Copy !req