Mary Shelley's Frankenhole 1x4

Directed by David Tuber

Hitler is sick of hating the Jews. Can Mad Scientist Victor Frankenstein help? Tune in and find out.

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1. MR. VICTOR, THE POOR, THEY

2. NEED SO MUCH MY HELP BACK IN

3. CALCUTTA-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A...

4. A-A-A-A-AAH!

5. DON'T GIVE ME THOSE PUPPY-DOG

6. EYESIES!

7. BREAKFAST FOR DINNER AGAIN?

8. WHY MUST YOU BEGIN WORK AT

9. MIDNIGHT?

10. BECAUSE IT IS

11. SPOOKY, THAT'S WHY!

12. IT LENDS CREDIBILITY TO MY MAD

13. EXPERIMENTS.

14. GOOD EVENING, MOTHER.

15. GOOD MORNING, FATHER.

16. GOOD EVENING.

17. GOOD MORNING.

18. LOOK, MOTHER!

19. I LOST

20. ANOTHER TOOTH!

21. OH, HOW SWEET.

22. PUT IT UNDER YOUR PILLOW FOR THE

23. TOOTH FAIRY.

24. YAY!

25. ARE YOU ALL

26. NUTS?

27. YOU'RE HAVING HIM PUT HIS DEAD

28. TOOTH UNDER A NICE, SOFT PILLOW?

29. WE ARE CELEBRATING THE CHANGE

30. IN HEINRICH'S BODY.

31. HEINRICH, YOU

32. KNOW THAT THAT'S YOUR LAST

33. TOP-LEFT BICUSPID, RIGHT?

34. YOU DON'T GET A NEW ONE.

35. I KNOW.

36. ME TOO.

37. AND THERE IS NO

38. SUCH THING AS A TOOTH FAIRY.

39. NEXT THING YOU'LL TELL ME IS

40. THAT SANTY CLAUS BRINGS DRACULA

41. A HUGE BUNDLE OF BABY THROATS

42. EVERY CHRISTMAS.

43. OOH. SPEAK OF THE DEVIL-CULA.

44. OH! HELLO!

45. I'LL BE RIGHT OUT, COUNT!

46. WHAT DOES THE

47. PRINCE OF HORNY WANT WITH YOU

48. NOW?

49. HE'S TAKING ME TO THE OPERA,

50. AS IF YOU CARE.

51. I'M GOING TO

52. THE LAB.

53. WHO ARE YOU HELPING...

54. THAT'S NOT US?

55. SOMEONE WHO

56. ACTUALLY DESERVES MY HELP.

57. ADOLF... HITLER?

58. AAH!

59. WELL, THANK YOU

60. FOR COMING ALL THE WAY FROM YOUR

61. OWN TIME AND SPACE.

62. MOSTLY

63. TIME, REALLY.

64. IT'S NO PROBLEM.

65. KIND OF FUN, ACTUALLY.

66. YES, WELL, UH,

67. WHAT CAN WE DO FOR YOU?

68. I...

69. I HATE THE JEWS.

70. HISTORICALLY,

71. YOU A IN GOOD COMPANY.

72. YEAH, BUT I'M JUST SICK OF

73. IT.

74. IT'S CONTROLLING MY WHOLE LIFE!

75. HERR FRANKENSTEIN...

76. I WANT TO QUIT HATING THE JEWS.

77. THEN WHY DON'T

78. YOU JUST START LIKING THEM?

79. I CAN'T!

80. I WANT TO, BUT MY HANDS ARE

81. TIED!

82. I HATE THEM!

83. HAVE YOU TRIED NOT

84. HATING THEM?

85. WHAT DO YOU THINK?

86. I'M STUPID? YEAH, I TRIED!

87. LOOK.

88. THERE! TRIED AGAIN!

89. STILL HATE 'EM. SATISFIED?

90. WELL, IF I WERE

91. YOU, MR. HITLER —

92. YO WOULD DO EXACTLY AS I

93. DO...

94. IF YOU WERE ME.

95. YOU THINK I WANT TO BE LIKE

96. THIS?

97. YOU THINK I PICKED THE SHAPE OF

98. THIS DUMB BRAIN OF MINE?

99. DID I CHOOSE THE ENVIRONMENT I

100. GREW UP IN DURING MY FORMATIVE

101. YEARS?

102. AND WAS I MY OWN PARENTS WHO

103. RAISED MYSELF IN A COLD,

104. EMOTIONLESS GERMANIC CHILDHOOD?

105. NO!

106. DESPISING AND FEARING JEWS IS

107. MORE THAN JUST A FUN PASTIME FOR

108. ME.

109. IT IS A CONTROLLING HANDICAP

110. THAT GETS IN THE WAY OF ME BEING

111. WHO I REALLY AM...

112. A TOLERATOR OF JEWS.

113. I'M SURE WE CAN

114. HELP YOU.

115. OH, HERR FRANKENSTEIN,

116. HERR POLIDORI, IF YOU CAN RID ME

117. OF THIS BURDENSOME CHARACTER

118. FLAW, I WOULD GIVE YOU

119. ANYTHING.

120. EVEN THE GIFT OF ME NOT HAVING

121. YOU EXECUTED BY THE GESTAPO.

122. I KNOW PEOPLE.

123. GIVE US AN

124. AFTERNOON TO RESEARCH THIS

125. DILEMMA.

126. THERE'S A QUAINT LITTLE PUB IN

127. THE VILLAGE WHERE YOU CAN OCCUPY

128. YOURSELF.

129. MY CREATION WILL SHOW YOU THERE.

130. HE'S AN ALCOHOLIC.

131. WHAT UNRECIPROCATED FAVOR MAY

132. I CARRY OUT IN YOUR HONOR TODAY,

133. MASTER GENIUS?

134. FUNNY.

135. I ALWAYS — I ALWAYS PICTURED

136. YOU AS BEING GREEN.

137. SHALL WE NOT TARRY?

138. WELL, I'LL NEED

139. A SMOKE BEFORE WE START.

140. YES, AND I COULD

141. USE A SWIFT WANKING.

142. OH, HELLO, HERR WORKY-JOB.

143. TAKING A BREAK FROM YOUR

144. JOBBY-WORK?

145. NICE ONE.

146. DON'T!

147. YOU KEEP

148. TRYING, EH, COUNT?

149. I THINK THOSE HOLES MEAN

150. MORE THAN TRYING.

151. I THINK I DID IT.

152. I PUT MY TEETH IN THERE.

153. YES, BUT YOU'LL

154. NEVER MAKE HER A VAMPIRE.

155. IT GETS YOUR GOAT, DOESN'T IT?

156. I ASSURE YOU, MY GOAT IS

157. QUITE SAFE.

158. SINCE ELIZABETH HERE ALREADY

159. IMMORTAL, WHAT I CARE SHE GOT

160. FANGS, SHE CAN FLAP AROUND LIKE

161. FLAPPY BAT?

162. I DON'T CARE.

163. SHE DOES WHATEVER I WANT.

164. YOU MEAN, YOU

165. DO WHATEVER SHE WANTS.

166. NO, I DO WHAT I WANT, AND SHE

167. DOES —

168. SHE... DO WHAT I WANT.

169. SHE DOES NOT.

170. OH-HO, YES, SHE DOES.

171. NO WAY.

172. HELLO! I'M RIGHT HERE!

173. NO WAY!

174. YE WAY.

175. BUT THIS IS CHILDISH!

176. WALKING AWAY DOESN'T MAKE YOU

177. RIGHT!

178. AAH!

179. MEN.

180. ALTHOUGH I AM INDESTRUCTIBLE,

181. A SENSE OF DREAD CONSTANTLY

182. PERVADES MY CONSCIOUSNESS — AN

183. ENNUI THAT SENDS ME INTO FITS

184. OF TREMBLING UNREST THAT I CAN

185. FIND NO SOLACE FROM.

186. YOU'RE A JEW, AREN'T YOU?

187. MY ONLY HERITAGE...

188. IS DEATH.

189. DEATH IS MY LEGACY.

190. DEATH, MY BIRTHRIGHT.

191. DEATH...

192. MY INHERITANCE.

193. YES. DEFINITELY A JEW.

194. SOMEWHAT.

195. MY LEFT LEG WAS CHOSEN FROM THE

196. CHOSEN.

197. ANOTHER DRINK?

198. TIDINGS.

199. THINK NOTHING OF IT.

200. I AM MADE OF MONEY.

201. I CONTROL MANY OF YOUR LEG'S

202. PEOPLE'S BANKS.

203. ONCE, I CONTROLLED HIM.

204. MY PRESENCE FILLED FRANKENSTEIN

205. WITH CHILLS!

206. CONTROL IS OVERRATED.

207. IT DOESN'T MAKE YOU HAPPY.

208. IT DOESN'T KEEP ME FROM BEING

209. FRIGHTENED.

210. OF WHAT ART THOU FRIGHTENED?

211. BEING CALLED A MONSTER.

212. AAH! I HATE THAT WORD!

213. IT

214. PROBABLY APPLIES TO ME, THOUGH.

215. IF YOU'RE SO AWARE OF THINE

216. OWN HEART, WHY STRUGGLE AGAINST

217. ITS LEANINGS?

218. I'M NOT ALWAYS THIS AWARE.

219. I HAD A DREAM.

220. FREUD!

221. I SHOULD HAVE KILLED YOU WHEN I

222. HAD YOU IN MY CLUTCHES!

223. ZOUNDS.

224. I'M SORRY! SORRY!

225. I'M VERY INSECURE.

226. YOU HAVE NO NEED TO BE.

227. REALLY?

228. OH, YOU'RE NICE, PALLY.

229. PALLY?

230. L-LET'S DO SOME SHOTS.

231. I FEEL ALL TINGLY!

232. I'M YOUR PALLY?

233. OOH-HOO!

234. I THINK I'M GETTING SPAGHETTI

235. LEGS.

236. SO, HOW'S THE LITTLE

237. BRAINY-HEADS DOING?

238. GREAT.

239. THE ANSWER'S VERY SIMPLE.

240. SEE HERE — NOT ENOUGH BLOOD IS

241. ENTERING THE TOLERANCE PART OF

242. YOUR BRAIN.

243. SO ALL WE NEED TO DO RE-ROUTE

244. THIS ARTERY AND IT SHOULD SEND

245. OXYGEN TO THAT PART OF THE LOBE,

246. FEEDING THE AREA THAT'S BEEN

247. SUFFOCATING.

248. AND THIS WILL STOP ME FROM

249. HATING THE JEWS?

250. OH, YES.

251. YOU'LL BE NOT-HATING THE CRAP

252. OUT OF THOSE JEWS.

253. UM, BUT THERE

254. MAY BE ONE POSSIBLE SIDE EFFECT.

255. WHAT, LIKE DIARRHEA?

256. THAT'S FINE.

257. I CAN LIVE WITH THAT.

258. IT'S... A LITTLE

259. DIFFERENT THAN DIARRHEA.

260. I'M AFRAID SO,

261. MR. HITLER.

262. THIS PROCESS MAY LEAVE YOU...

263. LOVING THE JEWS.

264. L-L-L-L-L-L-L-LOVING?

265. NOT JUST TOL-L-L-ERATING?

266. THAT'S RIGHT.

267. LIKE, "GOING OUT OF MY WAY"

268. LOVING?

269. YEP.

270. WELL, THAT

271. IS A LITTLE DIFFERENT THAN

272. DIARRHEA.

273. OKAY. I'LL RISK IT.

274. ADOLF HITLER,

275. GET ON THAT SLAB!

276. HEY, SO, THE JEWS...

277. NOT SO BAD!

278. HUZZAH!

279. VICTOR CLAIMS THAT TO BE

280. TRULY IMMORTAL, ONE MUST AFFECT

281. MANKIND IN SOME POSITIVE WAY.

282. OH, I DON'T KNOW IF BEING

283. POSITIVE IS ALL THAT MANDATORY.

284. IS YOUR LEG OKAY?

285. HAS IT GOT ENOUGH ROOM?

286. YES. SUFFICIENT.

287. ALAS! I FALL —

288. ARE YOU SURE THERE'S ENOUGH

289. ROOM FOR THE LEG?

290. IT SEEMS A BIT SQUASHED OVER

291. THERE.

292. NO. WORRY NOT. I-IT'S FINE.

293. AND EVEN —

294. SO, HOW IS YOUR LEFT LEG

295. IN GENERAL?

296. WHAT? OH, IT STILL —

297. COME ON. LIFT UP YOUR PANT.

298. LET'S SEE THE LITTLE FELLA.

299. NO. IT SHAMES ME.

300. SHAMES? WHY?

301. YOU'RE THE UGLY ONE.

302. COME! UP WITH IT!

303. OH! LOOK AT HIM! HE'S ADORABLE!

304. HI, YOU! YOU WANT A DRINK?

305. SURE YOU DO!

306. A WINE FOR MY SEMITIC LITTLE

307. FRIEND HERE — SOMETHING THAT

308. FOLLOWS THE ANCIENT HEBREW

309. LAWS, YOU SWINE!

310. L'CHAIM!

311. AH, I LOVE DRINKING DURING THE

312. DAY, DON'T YOU?

313. WHAT ELSE IS THERE?

314. NOT

315. TALKING TO YOU.

316. YES, OF COURSE.

317. ARE YOU GETTING TIRED?

318. I' GETTING A BIT FATIGUED.

319. WHO ASKED YOU?

320. I JUST AM.

321. WELL, THEN, WHY DON'T YOU

322. JUST LEAVE?

323. QUITE FRANKLY, YOU'RE NOTHING

324. BUT A BIG, WORTHLESS THIRD

325. WHEEL.

326. THERE!

327. DON'T LET ME SPOIL THY FUN!

328. AAAAAAH!

329. LET'S KIBITZ!

330. YOU'RE IT.

331. NO, YOU'RE IT.

332. OH, DAMN IT!

333. OKAY, OKAY. I GIVE. I GIVE.

334. NOW WHAT DO YOU WANT TO DO?

335. LET'S PLAY "TRUTH OR DARE."

336. YOU FIRST.

337. UM...

338. DARE.

339. NO, NO! TRUTH, TRUTH!

340. NO, NO! DARE, DARE!

341. NO, TRUTH!

342. DARE. DARE.

343. NO, NO, NO!

344. TRUTH, TRUTH, TRUTH, TRUTH.

345. OKAY.

346. WHAT'S THE WORST THING YOU'VE

347. EVER PLANNED ON DOING?

348. WELL...

349. LOOK, CAN'T YOU JUST FORGET

350. ABOUT ALL THAT?

351. FORGET? NEVER!

352. I HAVE TO DRAW THE LINE

353. SOMEWHERE!

354. THAT WAS THE OLD ME!

355. IT WAS JUST A PLAN!

356. I REJECT YOU — YOU AND THAT

357. FAKAKTA MUSTACHE!

358. CHAPLIN HAD THIS FIRST!

359. OOH, HIS LITTLE TRAMP...

360. YOU'RE DEAD TO ME!

361. AAAAAAAH!

362. AAAAAAAAAAAAAH!

363. ICH BIN EIN BERLINER!

364. UH, WHAT DID HE SAY?

365. I THINK HE SAID

366. HE'S A DOUGHNUT.

367. HE SURE IS!

368. NO, YOU ARE DOUGHNUT,

369. FRANKENSTEIN, FOR I HAVE DATE TO

370. TAKE YOUR WIFE ON ROMANTIC

371. HAYRIDE SOMETIME IN NEXT FEW

372. WEEKS, WHEN HAYRIDE PEOPLE HAVE

373. AN OPENING FOR US.

374. YOU DOUGHNUT!

375. HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA!

376. [ High-pitched ] YOU

377. DOUGHNUT!