1. This is the world—Copy !req
2. 196 million square miles.Copy !req
3. If I covered 100 square milesCopy !req
4. an hourCopy !req
5. every hourCopy !req
6. for the rest of my lifeCopy !req
7. I'd still only see half of it.Copy !req
8. This is the left nostrilCopy !req
9. of my brother Reese.Copy !req
10. It squeaks all night long.Copy !req
11. These areCopy !req
12. the freezing cold feetCopy !req
13. of my little brother... Dewey.Copy !req
14. This is my oldest brotherCopy !req
15. Francis.Copy !req
16. He's the one I really likeCopy !req
17. so, of course, he got sentCopy !req
18. to military school.Copy !req
19. My name is Malcolm.Copy !req
20. You want to knowCopy !req
21. what the best thingCopy !req
22. about childhood is?Copy !req
23. At some point, it stops.Copy !req
24. Malcolm, Reese, Dewey,Copy !req
25. get in here!Copy !req
26. No, stop!Copy !req
27. I'm not touching...Copy !req
28. There's only twoCopy !req
29. toaster waffles.Copy !req
30. One of you hasCopy !req
31. to have cereal.Copy !req
32. It's mine!Copy !req
33. Come on!Copy !req
34. Give it!Copy !req
35. You cheated!Copy !req
36. Give it! Give it!Copy !req
37. Huh, look at this.Copy !req
38. They're sendingCopy !req
39. an unmannedCopy !req
40. probe to VenusCopy !req
41. and letting a bunch ofCopy !req
42. schoolchildren name it.Copy !req
43. Well, that's goingCopy !req
44. to end badly.Copy !req
45. They do this every month.Copy !req
46. He has sensitive skin.Copy !req
47. The hair gets itchyCopy !req
48. under his clothes.Copy !req
49. It always seemsCopy !req
50. like such a shameCopy !req
51. to just dump thisCopy !req
52. in the trash.Copy !req
53. Maybe birds would likeCopy !req
54. to make nests with itCopy !req
55. or, I don't know, maybeCopy !req
56. you boys could use itCopy !req
57. for school projects.Copy !req
58. Arms up.Copy !req
59. Malcolm, come right homeCopy !req
60. from school.Copy !req
61. Dude.Copy !req
62. Malcolm, you come right homeCopy !req
63. from school today.Copy !req
64. I made a play date for youCopy !req
65. with Stevie KenarbanCopy !req
66. and you haveCopy !req
67. to take a bath.Copy !req
68. What? Mom, no!Copy !req
69. MalcolmCopy !req
70. has a play date?Copy !req
71. Shut up, Reese!Copy !req
72. With Stevie "TheCopy !req
73. Wheelie" Kenarban?Copy !req
74. Oh, man!Copy !req
75. Why is playingCopy !req
76. a problem for you?Copy !req
77. First off,Copy !req
78. I don't even know Stevie.Copy !req
79. I saw his motherCopy !req
80. at the grocery story. She saidCopy !req
81. you boys ate lunch together.Copy !req
82. One time.Copy !req
83. He rolled his wheelchairCopy !req
84. over next to me.Copy !req
85. It's not likeCopy !req
86. I couldn't say, "go away."Copy !req
87. He's not evenCopy !req
88. in my class.Copy !req
89. He's in the Krelboyne classCopy !req
90. in the trailerCopy !req
91. next to tetherball.Copy !req
92. You listen to me,Copy !req
93. young man.Copy !req
94. That one lunch obviouslyCopy !req
95. meant a lot to Stevie.Copy !req
96. He's a human beingCopy !req
97. with human feelings.Copy !req
98. Now, you are goingCopy !req
99. to be friends withCopy !req
100. that crippled boyCopy !req
101. and you are goingCopy !req
102. to like it. Understood?Copy !req
103. Yes, ma'am. Understood.Copy !req
104. If I give up now,Copy !req
105. I won't get the lecture.Copy !req
106. You kids...Copy !req
107. Dang.Copy !req
108. You just take your legsCopy !req
109. for granted, you know?Copy !req
110. Like nothing couldCopy !req
111. ever happen to them.Copy !req
112. Well, let me tell you something.Copy !req
113. That is justCopy !req
114. wishful thinking.Copy !req
115. There's meningitis.Copy !req
116. There are car accidents.Copy !req
117. I could be givingCopy !req
118. you a spankingCopy !req
119. and accidentally snapCopy !req
120. your spinal cord.Copy !req
121. Every day is a lotteryCopy !req
122. and first prizeCopy !req
123. is that you don't have to scootCopy !req
124. yourself around town onCopy !req
125. a skateboard with your hands.Copy !req
126. You think about that.Copy !req
127. I don't take my legsCopy !req
128. for granted, Mom.Copy !req
129. I know, honey,Copy !req
130. you're a good boy.Copy !req
131. Stop playing with yourself.Copy !req
132. Go on, just go.Copy !req
133. No, wait, wait, wait.Copy !req
134. Okay, okay, okay,Copy !req
135. I ran out of ham.Copy !req
136. One of you hasCopy !req
137. to have egg salad, okay?Copy !req
138. And don't ditchCopy !req
139. your little brother.Copy !req
140. I don't want himCopy !req
141. getting kidnapped.Copy !req
142. Yeah, Mom, thatCopy !req
143. would be terrible.Copy !req
144. It's your turnCopy !req
145. to walk with him.Copy !req
146. I walked him yesterdayCopy !req
147. and the day before.Copy !req
148. I walked with himCopy !req
149. when he wet his pants.Copy !req
150. Okay.Copy !req
151. Mom said to hold hands.Copy !req
152. She did not sayCopy !req
153. to hold hands, Dewey.Copy !req
154. I'm not holding hands.Copy !req
155. Come on, hold hands. Please?Copy !req
156. No! You're inCopy !req
157. the first grade.Copy !req
158. You're too big for that.Copy !req
159. Look, I'm walkingCopy !req
160. right next to you.Copy !req
161. You'll be fine.Copy !req
162. Damn it! This is whyCopy !req
163. everyone teases you.Copy !req
164. Hey, Malcolm.Copy !req
165. Hey, Richard.Copy !req
166. So my mom was tellingCopy !req
167. my dad last nightCopy !req
168. about your brother.Copy !req
169. She said he's in jail.Copy !req
170. He's not in jail.Copy !req
171. He's at Marlin Academy.Copy !req
172. It's, like, one of theCopy !req
173. best private schoolsCopy !req
174. in the countryCopy !req
175. and it's totally unfair.Copy !req
176. Everyone acts like FrancisCopy !req
177. is just this big troublemakerCopy !req
178. and he's not.Copy !req
179. Dad, I knowCopy !req
180. what you're going to sayCopy !req
181. and believe me,Copy !req
182. I totally agree with you.Copy !req
183. There is no excuseCopy !req
184. for what I did.Copy !req
185. It was idiotic, immature,Copy !req
186. totally recklessCopy !req
187. and I'm really sorry.Copy !req
188. I'm just...Copy !req
189. I'm hoping against hopeCopy !req
190. that you will give meCopy !req
191. another chance, which, I admitCopy !req
192. I don't deserveCopy !req
193. but if you could justCopy !req
194. find it in your heartCopy !req
195. to forgive meCopy !req
196. I know I could earnCopy !req
197. your trust back.Copy !req
198. It's not like itCopy !req
199. was even our car.Copy !req
200. Spath, Spath, Spath!Copy !req
201. All right,Copy !req
202. Here's how it works.Copy !req
203. You can beg for mercyCopy !req
204. on your bellyCopy !req
205. lick the bottomCopy !req
206. of my shoesCopy !req
207. or take a beating.Copy !req
208. You must pick at least twoCopy !req
209. but... but-but,Copy !req
210. if you pick threeCopy !req
211. you get a passCopy !req
212. for the next two weeks.Copy !req
213. All right?Copy !req
214. Now, that's your best value.Copy !req
215. Dave Spath.Copy !req
216. He never gets sent anywhere.Copy !req
217. What do you doCopy !req
218. if he catches you?Copy !req
219. Roll in a ball.Copy !req
220. What if he startsCopy !req
221. kicking you?Copy !req
222. Stay in a ball.Copy !req
223. Okay. Come on.Copy !req
224. Wait.Copy !req
225. Never mind.Copy !req
226. Those of you finishedCopy !req
227. with your tempera paintsCopy !req
228. may bring your work up hereCopy !req
229. and start onCopy !req
230. your charcoal still lifes.Copy !req
231. You may takeCopy !req
232. two pieces ofCopy !req
233. fruit onlyCopy !req
234. and please be careful with them.Copy !req
235. I bought them with my own money.Copy !req
236. My own money.Copy !req
237. God, Malcolm, that's so good.Copy !req
238. Oh, Malcolm,Copy !req
239. this is wonderful.Copy !req
240. The perspectiveCopy !req
241. is good.Copy !req
242. The composition is cleanCopy !req
243. and it even shows signsCopy !req
244. of actual technique.Copy !req
245. I have to sayCopy !req
246. this is the highCopy !req
247. point of my day.Copy !req
248. How's that for sad?Copy !req
249. Are you okay?Copy !req
250. Um, yeah, I'm fine.Copy !req
251. Malcolm.Copy !req
252. What?Copy !req
253. They need to see youCopy !req
254. in the office.Copy !req
255. Okay.Copy !req
256. I think they mean right now.Copy !req
257. Okay.Copy !req
258. Get up, Malcolm.Copy !req
259. Hi. I'm Caroline.Copy !req
260. Want to have a seat?Copy !req
261. Are you Malcolm?Copy !req
262. Yes, and I didn'tCopy !req
263. do anything.Copy !req
264. You're not in trouble, Malcolm.Copy !req
265. You're hereCopy !req
266. 'cause some of your teachersCopy !req
267. think you're, um...Copy !req
268. you know what?Copy !req
269. I just want to playCopy !req
270. some games with you.Copy !req
271. Okay? Puzzles,Copy !req
272. stuff like that.Copy !req
273. Why?Copy !req
274. Boy, oh, boyCopy !req
275. you are a suspiciousCopy !req
276. little dickens, aren't you?Copy !req
277. Okay. Now, you can lookCopy !req
278. at this picture for 60 secondsCopy !req
279. and I want you to tell meCopy !req
280. everything that's wrongCopy !req
281. with it, okay?Copy !req
282. The man only hasCopy !req
283. four fingers.Copy !req
284. Right, but this timeCopy !req
285. I want you to take your timeCopy !req
286. and really look...Copy !req
287. The car shadow'sCopy !req
288. going the wrong way,Copy !req
289. the steering wheel'sCopy !req
290. on the wrong side,Copy !req
291. there's noCopy !req
292. brake pedal,Copy !req
293. the words in the mirrorCopy !req
294. should be backwards,Copy !req
295. the guy's watchCopy !req
296. wouldn't say 12:00Copy !req
297. if he's looking at a sunsetCopy !req
298. and I have red paint on my ass.Copy !req
299. That's right.Copy !req
300. Red paint all over my ass!Copy !req
301. (intro toCopy !req
302. "Tie a Yellow Ribbon" playing)Copy !req
303. These are good cookies.Copy !req
304. Yeah... they're good.Copy !req
305. So what can you do?Copy !req
306. I mean,Copy !req
307. what do you want to do?Copy !req
308. I know... a joke.Copy !req
309. Yeah? Okay.Copy !req
310. A guy...Copy !req
311. goes into...Copy !req
312. a bar...Copy !req
313. and he...Copy !req
314. has a... frogCopy !req
315. on his...Copy !req
316. Frog on his head.Copy !req
317. And the... bartender...Copy !req
318. Wait, I screwed up.Copy !req
319. A frog...Copy !req
320. goes into... a bar.Copy !req
321. You want to watch TV?Copy !req
322. Can't. Not allowed.Copy !req
323. What? You mean, ever?Copy !req
324. Mom says...Copy !req
325. TV makes you...Copy !req
326. stupid.Copy !req
327. No, TV makes you normal.Copy !req
328. How can they do that?Copy !req
329. He's in a wheelchair.Copy !req
330. So what do you doCopy !req
331. all day, homework?Copy !req
332. Mostly... read... comics.Copy !req
333. You have comic books?Copy !req
334. Whoa!Copy !req
335. You really haveCopy !req
336. Youngblood, number one?Copy !req
337. Want to... read it?Copy !req
338. No way. I'd wreck it.Copy !req
339. Oh... did you readCopy !req
340. the last Savage DragonCopy !req
341. when they split him in two?Copy !req
342. Yeah. Brilliant.Copy !req
343. I like how he never hasCopy !req
344. to learn a lesson or anything.Copy !req
345. He just gets toCopy !req
346. pound on everyone.Copy !req
347. You're under galactic arrest.Copy !req
348. Think again, space flatfoot.Copy !req
349. You cannot escape.Copy !req
350. Saturday morningCopy !req
351. is the only thingCopy !req
352. my family does betterCopy !req
353. than anyone else.Copy !req
354. Damn!Copy !req
355. You boys,Copy !req
356. you keep this house cleanCopy !req
357. till your dad comes home.Copy !req
358. Two of you can haveCopy !req
359. slices of pizza for lunch.Copy !req
360. The other one can have...Copy !req
361. I don't know.Copy !req
362. I think they're peas.Copy !req
363. Somebody get that.Copy !req
364. Not it.Copy !req
365. Not it.Copy !req
366. Hello.Copy !req
367. Young master Malcolm.Copy !req
368. Francis, hi.Copy !req
369. Hey, man,Copy !req
370. I wrote you guysCopy !req
371. a really long letter yesterday,Copy !req
372. but, listen, they only gave me,Copy !req
373. like, three minutes,Copy !req
374. so would you putCopy !req
375. the special prosecutor on?Copy !req
376. Mom, it's Francis.Copy !req
377. Hey, Francis, how's school?Copy !req
378. Oh, couldn't be better, Mom.Copy !req
379. My new roommate showed meCopy !req
380. how to kill miceCopy !req
381. with a hammer yesterday,Copy !req
382. so, you know, between thatCopy !req
383. and the general atmosphereCopy !req
384. of simmering homoeroticism,Copy !req
385. I think I'm really startingCopy !req
386. to turn around.Copy !req
387. Honey, it's only until summer.Copy !req
388. Come on, push it!Copy !req
389. Give it up,Copy !req
390. prom date.Copy !req
391. Yeah, listen, um...Copy !req
392. I know I shouldn't ask,Copy !req
393. but would you be ableCopy !req
394. to send me my allowance,Copy !req
395. like, a couple weeks earlyCopy !req
396. 'cause I kind of need some...?Copy !req
397. Oh, my God! Are you smoking?Copy !req
398. What?Copy !req
399. I can hear you smoking.Copy !req
400. You're smoking, aren't you?Copy !req
401. Mom, I'm not smoking. Geez.Copy !req
402. After seeing the anguishCopy !req
403. your father and ICopy !req
404. went through to quit,Copy !req
405. didn't any of thatCopy !req
406. register with you?Copy !req
407. Okay, listen.Copy !req
408. I'll talk to your dad.Copy !req
409. Maybe we can send youCopy !req
410. part of it.Copy !req
411. Honey, I have to go.Copy !req
412. I'm late for work.Copy !req
413. I'll call you later.Copy !req
414. Okay, thanks, Mom. I love you.Copy !req
415. Oh... I love you.Copy !req
416. Somebody get the door!Copy !req
417. I'm not getting it.Copy !req
418. You get it, butt-munch.Copy !req
419. Shut up.Copy !req
420. You shut up.Copy !req
421. No, you shut up!Copy !req
422. Make me!Copy !req
423. I'll make you right now!Copy !req
424. You'd better not be fightingCopy !req
425. in there, Reese, Malcolm.Copy !req
426. Not my face!Copy !req
427. I said you'd better notCopy !req
428. be fighting in...Copy !req
429. For crying out loud.Copy !req
430. Reese! Malcolm!Copy !req
431. Yes. Can I help you?Copy !req
432. Oh. My good... um, hi.Copy !req
433. Hel... hello. I'm...Copy !req
434. Are you...? I'm...Copy !req
435. Caroline MillerCopy !req
436. from Malcolm's school.Copy !req
437. I sent you some lettersCopy !req
438. and left some messagesCopy !req
439. on your answering machine.Copy !req
440. Okay, fine. You caught me.Copy !req
441. What do you want?Copy !req
442. Um... well, it'sCopy !req
443. been three weeksCopy !req
444. and you haven't responded,Copy !req
445. and it's really important,Copy !req
446. I mean, well,Copy !req
447. for Malcolm's sakeCopy !req
448. that the parents beCopy !req
449. as involved in...Copy !req
450. So, what, you're here to insultCopy !req
451. my parenting skills?Copy !req
452. No. I'm sure you'reCopy !req
453. a terrific parent.Copy !req
454. I'm here because I thinkCopy !req
455. that there is a tremendousCopy !req
456. opportunity for...Copy !req
457. Could you, you know,Copy !req
458. maybe put a top on?Copy !req
459. They're just boobs, lady.Copy !req
460. You see them in a mirrorCopy !req
461. every morning.Copy !req
462. And I'm sure yoursCopy !req
463. are a lot nicer than mine.Copy !req
464. That's actually not...Copy !req
465. You know what?Copy !req
466. I'm gonna tell youCopy !req
467. something else.Copy !req
468. The reason I didn't respondCopy !req
469. is because it isCopy !req
470. a load of crap.Copy !req
471. What?Copy !req
472. You are not goingCopy !req
473. to stick my MalcolmCopy !req
474. in some special ed class.Copy !req
475. What is itCopy !req
476. with you people?Copy !req
477. Why do you feel you haveCopy !req
478. to label everybody?Copy !req
479. Malcolm may be a little strange,Copy !req
480. and, I know, I know,Copy !req
481. he never shuts up,Copy !req
482. but he is not disturbed.Copy !req
483. You know, he is a good boy...Copy !req
484. Please!Copy !req
485. You know what? You don'tCopy !req
486. understand at all, okay?Copy !req
487. So if I could justCopy !req
488. come in for a minute,Copy !req
489. I could explainCopy !req
490. everything, okay?Copy !req
491. Ow! Ow! Ow!Copy !req
492. It's good, hon.Copy !req
493. Wait, wait, wait, wait.Copy !req
494. There's somethingCopy !req
495. we have to talk about.Copy !req
496. I thought we weren't goingCopy !req
497. to mention Aunt HelenCopy !req
498. till after the biopsy.Copy !req
499. It's not that.Copy !req
500. It's about Malcolm.Copy !req
501. I didn't do it.Copy !req
502. Yes, he did.Copy !req
503. I saw him.Copy !req
504. A teacherCopy !req
505. from school came byCopy !req
506. and she ranCopy !req
507. some tests with Malcolm.Copy !req
508. He has an IQ of 165.Copy !req
509. Who?Copy !req
510. Malcolm. He's a genius.Copy !req
511. He's goingCopy !req
512. to a special class.Copy !req
513. What?Copy !req
514. Malcolm's special?Copy !req
515. Where do you thinkCopy !req
516. that came from?Copy !req
517. They have a special programCopy !req
518. for gifted children.Copy !req
519. They have advanced textbooksCopy !req
520. and devoted teachersCopy !req
521. and all sorts of good thingsCopy !req
522. they don't want to wasteCopy !req
523. on normal kids.Copy !req
524. You start on Monday.Copy !req
525. You're going to put himCopy !req
526. in the Krelboyne class?Copy !req
527. Mom, no! I don't want to!Copy !req
528. What are you talking about?Copy !req
529. Of course you want to.Copy !req
530. No. I want to stayCopy !req
531. in my own class.Copy !req
532. I don't want to be a Krelboyne.Copy !req
533. Mom, seriously, KrelboynesCopy !req
534. get their butts kicked.Copy !req
535. Just stop one minute.Copy !req
536. There's nothing wrongCopy !req
537. with being smart.Copy !req
538. And there's nothing wrongCopy !req
539. with being cut from the herd.Copy !req
540. It makes you the one buffaloCopy !req
541. that isn't thereCopy !req
542. when the Indians runCopy !req
543. the rest of them off the cliff.Copy !req
544. Huh?Copy !req
545. Mom, this isn't fair!Copy !req
546. If I don't want to go,Copy !req
547. why do I have to?Copy !req
548. Because it's notCopy !req
549. just up to you.Copy !req
550. We have to doCopy !req
551. what's best for you.Copy !req
552. Mom, please!Copy !req
553. Don't make me go!Copy !req
554. Please!Copy !req
555. Malcolm, calm down.Copy !req
556. But it isn't fair!Copy !req
557. That's right.Copy !req
558. It isn't fair.Copy !req
559. It's the first timeCopy !req
560. anyone in this familyCopy !req
561. has ever been given an edge,Copy !req
562. and you are notCopy !req
563. going to waste it.Copy !req
564. Dad?Copy !req
565. Honey?Copy !req
566. Well... look, honey...Copy !req
567. Malcolm, you see...Copy !req
568. Oh, for crying out loud.Copy !req
569. How come there's neverCopy !req
570. any iced tea in this pitcher?Copy !req
571. I make a fresh batchCopy !req
572. every morning;Copy !req
573. it's goneCopy !req
574. by the time I get home.Copy !req
575. I want a better family!Copy !req
576. Malcolm...Copy !req
577. Look at that.Copy !req
578. Gone.Copy !req
579. I don't want to goCopy !req
580. to a special class.Copy !req
581. People think I'mCopy !req
582. weird enough already.Copy !req
583. I know.Copy !req
584. I like where I am.Copy !req
585. I want to stay.Copy !req
586. Sweetie, life doesCopy !req
587. not give youCopy !req
588. a lot of chances to move up,Copy !req
589. even if you deserve it.Copy !req
590. Look at your dad and me.Copy !req
591. Malcolm, I'm proud of you.Copy !req
592. You boys are so lucky.Copy !req
593. You have so many giftsCopy !req
594. that other kids don't have.Copy !req
595. And I just don't meanCopy !req
596. Stevie Kenarban, either.Copy !req
597. I mean, look at thoseCopy !req
598. Parker boys across the street.Copy !req
599. They may be healthy,Copy !req
600. but honest to God,Copy !req
601. those are the ugliestCopy !req
602. little boys ever born.Copy !req
603. They look like boiled beets,Copy !req
604. don't you think?Copy !req
605. And those Henderson kids?Copy !req
606. That electrocuted their dogCopy !req
607. when they were tryingCopy !req
608. to get free cable.Copy !req
609. How smart can they be?Copy !req
610. Just remember,Copy !req
611. any kid who makes fun of youCopy !req
612. is a creepy little loserCopy !req
613. who'll end up workingCopy !req
614. in a car wash.Copy !req
615. This shouldn't make meCopy !req
616. feel better, but it does.Copy !req
617. You'll be all right, sweetie.Copy !req
618. If you don't makeCopy !req
619. a big deal out of this,Copy !req
620. nobody else will either.Copy !req
621. And I just can't say enoughCopy !req
622. about how proudCopy !req
623. we should all be of MalcolmCopy !req
624. for getting intoCopy !req
625. the gifted program.Copy !req
626. Now, Malcolm may not lookCopy !req
627. different than the rest of us,Copy !req
628. but he is.Copy !req
629. Very different.Copy !req
630. In his brain.Copy !req
631. And I think we shouldCopy !req
632. recognize him for that.Copy !req
633. Bye.Copy !req
634. All righty,Copy !req
635. today we are startingCopy !req
636. a new sectionCopy !req
637. on the Peloponnesian War,Copy !req
638. which I knowCopy !req
639. you are all going to love.Copy !req
640. Malcolm?Copy !req
641. Are you okay?Copy !req
642. Uh, yeah. Fine.Copy !req
643. All right.Copy !req
644. Excuse me.Copy !req
645. Stop staring at me!Copy !req
646. Why do they keepCopy !req
647. doing that?Copy !req
648. You're new.Copy !req
649. Oh, great.Copy !req
650. So I'm the freakCopy !req
651. of the freak show?Copy !req
652. Just... chill out.Copy !req
653. Don't tell meCopy !req
654. to chill out.Copy !req
655. You chill out.Copy !req
656. Nobody can liveCopy !req
657. like this.Copy !req
658. I'm okay.Copy !req
659. Oh, sure.Copy !req
660. You're okay because it doesn'tCopy !req
661. make any difference to you.Copy !req
662. You've always been a freak.Copy !req
663. I used to be normal.Copy !req
664. Wait. Who justCopy !req
665. said that?Copy !req
666. You're going to take thatCopy !req
667. the wrong way, aren't you?Copy !req
668. You...Copy !req
669. suck.Copy !req
670. It's so cool!Copy !req
671. Around here, being smart isCopy !req
672. exactly like being radioactive.Copy !req
673. I can't believe I'm doing this.Copy !req
674. Stevie?Copy !req
675. What?Copy !req
676. Look,Copy !req
677. I...Copy !req
678. Score!Copy !req
679. Hey, Spath!Copy !req
680. Why don't you stopCopy !req
681. being such a butt-wipe?Copy !req
682. Ooh.Copy !req
683. What'd you call me?Copy !req
684. You heard me!Copy !req
685. I don't care anymore!Copy !req
686. I just don't care,Copy !req
687. Spath, okay?Copy !req
688. Alls you ever do is makeCopy !req
689. everybody miserable!Copy !req
690. Except for your littleCopy !req
691. monkey-slaves over there.Copy !req
692. Who, by the way,Copy !req
693. only pretend to like you.Copy !req
694. They hate you as muchCopy !req
695. as everyone else does!Copy !req
696. And you're just too busyCopy !req
697. being mean and stupidCopy !req
698. to ever figure it out!Copy !req
699. I keep trying to run,Copy !req
700. but my legs won't work.Copy !req
701. Mom was right,Copy !req
702. they are important.Copy !req
703. Wow.Copy !req
704. I don't know about you,Copy !req
705. but the KrelboyneCopy !req
706. really hurt my feelings.Copy !req
707. Hey...Copy !req
708. Go away, Stevie.Copy !req
709. It's good youCopy !req
710. two are friends.Copy !req
711. He won't mind sharingCopy !req
712. his wheelchair.Copy !req
713. Okay, this is where somethingCopy !req
714. good happens, finally.Copy !req
715. So we're going to slow downCopy !req
716. and make it lastCopy !req
717. as long as possible.Copy !req
718. Dude, you hit a cripple.Copy !req
719. I didn't mean to...Copy !req
720. I wasn't trying...Copy !req
721. Stevie, I'm sorry!Copy !req
722. Ow...Copy !req
723. Aah...Copy !req
724. Ow!Copy !req
725. What's your problem?Copy !req
726. I mean, he's in a wheelchairCopy !req
727. and he has glasses.Copy !req
728. Do you know howCopy !req
729. bad that looks?Copy !req
730. What's your problem?Copy !req
731. So then, the principal comes outCopy !req
732. and everyone's allCopy !req
733. talking at once.Copy !req
734. So the story he puts togetherCopy !req
735. is that Spath attacks StevieCopy !req
736. for his lunch,Copy !req
737. and I'm like this heroCopy !req
738. that stepped in to defend him.Copy !req
739. It was beautiful.Copy !req
740. Okay, it wasn't funnyCopy !req
741. when Spath started crying.Copy !req
742. No, wait, it was.Copy !req
743. Dad's hair... ugh.Copy !req
744. Yeah, I know. It's gross.Copy !req
745. But, hey, if a bunch of birdsCopy !req
746. can make the bestCopy !req
747. out of what they get,Copy !req
748. then so can I.Copy !req
749. Malcolm?Copy !req
750. Like having toCopy !req
751. go to specialCopy !req
752. class.Copy !req
753. I can make itCopy !req
754. work out,Copy !req
755. right?Copy !req
756. Malcolm?Copy !req
757. Not now!Copy !req
758. Or myCopy !req
759. family.Copy !req
760. We're notCopy !req
761. the greatestCopy !req
762. family inCopy !req
763. the world,Copy !req
764. but we can getCopy !req
765. better.Copy !req
766. I mean, it'sCopy !req
767. notCopy !req
768. impossible.Copy !req
769. Malcolm?Copy !req
770. What?Copy !req
771. Can I get out?Copy !req
772. No! Stop asking!Copy !req
773. So, basically, ICopy !req
774. thinkCopy !req
775. everything'sCopy !req
776. going to be okay.Copy !req
777. A bug went up my nose.Copy !req
778. So what doCopy !req
779. you want meCopy !req
780. to do aboutCopy !req
781. it?Copy !req