1. Got the bricks?
Copy !req
2. Whoa! Whee!
Copy !req
3. Hang on, Dewey!
Copy !req
4. Eight more seconds
for the record!
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5. Whoa-ho! Yeah!
Copy !req
6. There we go.
Copy !req
7. Oh, Hal,
Copy !req
8. it's beautiful!
Copy !req
9. You boys are not
to sit on it, stand on it,
Copy !req
10. jump on it, or go anywhere
near it for the next year.
Copy !req
11. Where's this
coming from?
Copy !req
12. Hey, Dewey,
Copy !req
13. want to go
with me to take
Copy !req
14. the old couch
to the dump?
Copy !req
15. No, I want to
watch cartoons.
Copy !req
16. What, are you kidding?
Copy !req
17. We're talking
about the city dump.
Copy !req
18. Mountains of
smoldering garbage
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19. as far as you can see.
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20. Swarms of flies
that block out the sun.
Copy !req
21. Really?
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22. Mmm.
Copy !req
23. Last time
I was there,
Copy !req
24. I saw a 40-pound
seagull carry off
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25. a dog in its beak.
Copy !req
26. Wow.
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27. Wow.
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28. Come on!
Copy !req
29. Hey, guys.
Copy !req
30. Sorry I'm late.
Copy !req
31. Stevie and I finished
our geometry unit.
Copy !req
32. We're two
weeks ahead.
Copy !req
33. Congratulations,
you're grounded.
Copy !req
34. What?
Copy !req
35. You're an hour
and a half late.
Copy !req
36. You promised you'd be back at
3:00 to help with the couch.
Copy !req
37. Your father and Reese
nearly killed themselves.
Copy !req
38. Yeah, but... No buts!
Copy !req
39. You're grounded.
Copy !req
40. Two weeks in your room,
no TV, no friends, no phone.
Copy !req
41. But I was doing
homework.
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42. I thought it'd be okay.
Copy !req
43. You're not allowed
to decide what's okay.
Copy !req
44. Not yet.
Copy !req
45. You looked me in the eye
and you promised.
Copy !req
46. You're grounded.
Copy !req
47. This is totally unfair!
Copy !req
48. Oh!
Copy !req
49. Okay, when did
I sit in tar?
Copy !req
50. ♪ Five broken toilets
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51. Yahoo!
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52. Uh, excuse me.
Copy !req
53. Can you tell us where
we should dump this couch?
Copy !req
54. Oh!
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55. Oh, for the love of...
Copy !req
56. We didn't even
get to see it land.
Copy !req
57. Well, son,
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58. I guess our work
here is done.
Copy !req
59. You are so dead.
Copy !req
60. Francis, you know
I couldn't go out
with Laura unless
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61. I found somebody
for her sister.
Copy !req
62. Now, you're here
so just try to
enjoy your date.
Copy !req
63. She's 12.
Copy !req
64. Hey, you guys
want tattoos?
Copy !req
65. So she's not
the one.
Copy !req
66. You can still
have a good time.
Copy !req
67. How could you
do this to me?
Copy !req
68. Come on.
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69. You've done way
worse to me.
Copy !req
70. You totally
deserve this.
Copy !req
71. Based on what?
Copy !req
72. Will you Jethros
just shut up!
Copy !req
73. Nobody cares how many
bales of hay you can lift!
Copy !req
74. So, now we know—
pigs can swim,
cows can't.
Copy !req
75. This is ridiculous.
Copy !req
76. When did the word
"Fascist" become
such a hot button?
Copy !req
77. I have been nothing
but a good friend to you.
Copy !req
78. Look, Francis, I'm
not going to argue.
Copy !req
79. You'll do this or
I'll punch your face
Copy !req
80. through the back
of your head.
Copy !req
81. See, every time
I trump you with logic,
Copy !req
82. you resort to violence.
Copy !req
83. I just want that
on the record.
Copy !req
84. Mmm, ice cream.
Copy !req
85. What a wonderful,
unexpected treat
for some of us.
Copy !req
86. Yes, Reese, you get
to eat ice cream
Copy !req
87. and I don't.
Copy !req
88. Thank you for
subtly illustrating
that point.
Copy !req
89. I'll get it.
Copy !req
90. Mmm, sprinkles.
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91. Aren't those
your favorite, Malcolm?
Copy !req
92. I'm rubbing my butt
on your pillowcase.
Copy !req
93. Oh, boy, Reese,
what'd you do?
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94. Sir, we have
to evacuate
Copy !req
95. the entire neighborhood.
Copy !req
96. I need you to leave
your house immediately.
Copy !req
97. What... evacuating?
Why?
Copy !req
98. There's been a toxic
chemical spill
Copy !req
99. about a mile away—
a train derailed.
Copy !req
100. How'd that happen?
Copy !req
101. Some idiot left a couch
on the railroad tracks.
Copy !req
102. I wonder if
that was...
Copy !req
103. Careful, son.
Copy !req
104. Don't want to drip.
Copy !req
105. I repeat, if you're not in need
Copy !req
106. of immediate first aid,
find an available cot,
Copy !req
107. remain calm and wait
for further instructions.
Copy !req
108. Will you look
at this?
Copy !req
109. I hope they find
whoever's responsible
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110. and string him up
by his thumbs.
Copy !req
111. Hey, uh, fella,
don't you think
Copy !req
112. you're overreacting?
Copy !req
113. I mean, my family
Copy !req
114. is exposed to dangerous
chemicals all the time.
Copy !req
115. In-in fact, I-I remember
Copy !req
116. I accidentally
set off a flea bomb
in the boys' room
Copy !req
117. when my son, Dewey, was
in there taking a nap.
Copy !req
118. I can smell colors.
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119. Sir, I've got two
overturned tankers
Copy !req
120. out there spewing out
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121. a cloud of sulfuric acid
and sodium hydroxide.
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122. That can scar your
throat and lungs
Copy !req
123. in a matter of seconds.
Copy !req
124. But it's not
necessarily fatal.
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125. I-I mean, maybe you'd need
an artificial larynx,
Copy !req
126. but you'd still
be alive.
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127. That'd be so cool.
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128. My name is Reese.
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129. What are you looking at?
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130. Son, please.
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131. Has anyone died yet?
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132. Not that I'm aware of.
Copy !req
133. Well, what if
the wind shifts?
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134. Is the water
supply going to
be contaminated?
Copy !req
135. What about the food?
Copy !req
136. What about the
medical personnel?
Copy !req
137. How can be sure that all these
people are going to be safe?
Copy !req
138. I'm sorry, I really
don't know all of the answers.
Copy !req
139. I'm just
a high school senior.
Copy !req
140. Are we going to order
at some point tonight?
Copy !req
141. Hang on, this is
important.
Copy !req
142. This is the only
booth she hasn't
Copy !req
143. been felt up in.
Copy !req
144. Have another doughnut,
lonely girl.
Copy !req
145. So, you like school?
Copy !req
146. You're blocking
my light!
Copy !req
147. Check it out.
Copy !req
148. Some idiot left
the storage
closet unlocked.
Copy !req
149. I've got every
Dixie Cup
in the place.
Copy !req
150. What are you
doing with those?
Copy !req
151. Building a future,
my friend.
Copy !req
152. I can't believe
this place.
Copy !req
153. This cot smells
like feet.
Copy !req
154. All right, we're just
Copy !req
155. going to have to make
the best of things.
Copy !req
156. Where do you think
you're going?
Copy !req
157. I'm just going
to look around.
Copy !req
158. You are not going anywhere.
Copy !req
159. You're still grounded. What? Here?
Copy !req
160. That's right.
Look around—
we're living in a gym!
Copy !req
161. That doesn't change
what you did.
Copy !req
162. Mom, we can all die.
Copy !req
163. If that happens,
you're off the hook.
Copy !req
164. Until then, I want
those buns on that cot.
Copy !req
165. Now.
Copy !req
166. Uh, excuse me. Excuse me.
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167. Listen, I-I was
just wondering if
Copy !req
168. there was something
that I could do to help.
Copy !req
169. Not that there's any
real reason, of course.
Copy !req
170. I'm just... looking
to do my part.
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171. I think we got it
pretty well covered, sir.
Copy !req
172. No, no, there
must be something.
Copy !req
173. I don't care if
it's, if it's
messy or trivial
Copy !req
174. or even
life-threatening...
Copy !req
175. Sir, I'd appreciate it
Copy !req
176. if you'd just return
to your area.
Copy !req
177. Please, you
have to find
Copy !req
178. some way for me
to be useful.
Copy !req
179. I have got to ease
these people's
suffering.
Copy !req
180. They have got to know
that I am here for them.
Copy !req
181. Is that pepper spray?
Copy !req
182. I also have a whistle
Copy !req
183. and I'm prepared
to use that as well.
Copy !req
184. You know, I'd be happy
to give you some
Copy !req
185. but you should
ask your parents first.
Copy !req
186. I can't.
Copy !req
187. They're dead.
Copy !req
188. What?
Copy !req
189. They were killed
by the cloud.
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190. Can I have some?
Copy !req
191. Oh, my God,
you poor thing.
Copy !req
192. They were choking.
Copy !req
193. It was awful.
Copy !req
194. Can I have
the one with nuts?
Copy !req
195. Oh, of course, dear.
Copy !req
196. Toxic chemical spill has
been reported in the area...
Copy !req
197. Where'd they go?
Copy !req
198. Don't worry, they'll
be back in a few hours.
Copy !req
199. They took the car?
Copy !req
200. Hey, you're the one
who went to the bathroom.
Copy !req
201. You gave them the opening.
Copy !req
202. All right, that's it.
Copy !req
203. Come on, get your books.
Copy !req
204. We're getting out of here.
Copy !req
205. No, I want to eat.
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206. No, we're going.
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207. I'm not leaving till I eat!
Copy !req
208. Would you keep it down, please?
Copy !req
209. You were a lot nicer when
we were on the Internet.
Copy !req
210. Look, you can't pull
this crap with me.
Copy !req
211. I have three
little brothers.
Copy !req
212. I know every
manipulation in the book.
Copy !req
213. So get your butt
in gear.
Copy !req
214. No, if I go home now,
Laura'll get busted.
Copy !req
215. We're supposed
to be at the mall.
Copy !req
216. What do you care?
Copy !req
217. Let me tell you
about your sister.
Copy !req
218. She doesn't
like you at all.
Copy !req
219. She treats you
like dirt.
Copy !req
220. Well... she does.
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221. It's not your fault.
Copy !req
222. I mean, you don't
deserve that.
Copy !req
223. No one deserves that.
Copy !req
224. She's the one
with the problem.
Copy !req
225. Really, I'm sure
you have a lot
of nice qualities
Copy !req
226. that people don't
even...
Copy !req
227. Waitress! Can we get
some service over here?
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228. Yes?
Copy !req
229. I want the burger plate,
Copy !req
230. extra fries and
a chocolate malt.
Copy !req
231. and then they were
trapped in the car
Copy !req
232. and they told me
to get help and I ran
Copy !req
233. and I ran,
Copy !req
234. then I fell down
and when I woke up,
Copy !req
235. the ambulance man
was holding me.
Copy !req
236. And your parents were...
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237. Ooh, you poor
little boy.
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238. That looks like fun.
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239. What is wrong with you?
Copy !req
240. Give that to him!
Copy !req
241. What can I say?
Copy !req
242. We're all trying to get
through as best we can.
Copy !req
243. Thank you.
Copy !req
244. And of course,
in these disasters,
Copy !req
245. it's always the children
who suffer the most.
Copy !req
246. No, no, no!
Copy !req
247. You're not talking to him.
He's grounded.
Copy !req
248. Looks like you need
a cup, friend.
Copy !req
249. Ah, that'd be
great, thanks.
Copy !req
250. I wish it were that simple.
Copy !req
251. What are you talking about?
I'm thirsty.
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252. Is that yourtruck out there
with the canned fruit?
Copy !req
253. Yeah, why?
Copy !req
254. Let's take a walk.
Copy !req
255. There!
Copy !req
256. That should take care
of that wobble, huh?
Copy !req
257. Listen, is it too drafty here?
Copy !req
258. Should we move you away
from the window?
Copy !req
259. No, no, we're fine.
Copy !req
260. Thanks for the help.
Copy !req
261. Well, that's what this
is all about, huh?
Copy !req
262. Helping each other out.
Copy !req
263. This is the kind of thing
that we should be focusing on.
Copy !req
264. Not a witch hunt,
Copy !req
265. pointing fingers...
blame, blame!
Copy !req
266. We are bigger than that,
Copy !req
267. aren't we, honey?
Copy !req
268. Who wants
a bedtime story?
Copy !req
269. Can't you make him
go away, Daddy?
Copy !req
270. She is precious.
Copy !req
271. Okay.
Copy !req
272. Excuse me, did you
find the boy whose
parents were killed?
Copy !req
273. Not yet.
Copy !req
274. Excuse me.
Copy !req
275. Did you say,
"killed"?
Copy !req
276. Yes, they were killed
by the gas cloud.
Copy !req
277. Oh, my God.
Copy !req
278. The boy's mother saved him
with her very last breath.
Copy !req
279. And then the poor boy had to
strangle his own dog
Copy !req
280. just to stop
its suffering.
Copy !req
281. And on his birthday!
Copy !req
282. Yes?
Copy !req
283. I want a piece of
apple pie a la mode,
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284. some chocolate cake
and a banana split.
Copy !req
285. Sure thing. Why don't you save
me some money
Copy !req
286. and just yell
at your sister
Copy !req
287. instead of burying your anger
in a mountain of French fries?
Copy !req
288. Are you calling me fat?
Copy !req
289. What? No, I'm not
calling you fat.
Copy !req
290. So now I'm a liar?
Copy !req
291. No, you're twisting around
everything I say.
Copy !req
292. Why do you do that?
Copy !req
293. You hurt my feelings.
Copy !req
294. Okay, would you just
keep it down, please?
Copy !req
295. I'm sorry.
Copy !req
296. Why do you touch
your hair so much?
Copy !req
297. I don't touch
my hair that much.
Copy !req
298. Why is everyone
so fixated on my hair?
Copy !req
299. I'm sick of it.
Copy !req
300. Okay, okay, relax.
Copy !req
301. I... I just...
I don't want to
talk about it.
Copy !req
302. It's just that people
make fun of me.
Copy !req
303. The guys at school call me
"Poodlehead."
Copy !req
304. That is so cruel.
Copy !req
305. I mean, I can see
it, but still...
Copy !req
306. I got to tell
you, Malcolm,
Copy !req
307. sometimes, I'm so good,
it's scary.
Copy !req
308. What are you doing
with toilet paper?
Copy !req
309. I got my hands
on some canned fruit.
Copy !req
310. I traded those for batteries,
the batteries for DVDs.
Copy !req
311. And I swapped those
with the janitor
Copy !req
312. for the school's entire supply
of toilet paper.
Copy !req
313. Once the specially "seasoned"
Copy !req
314. meat loaf works its magic,
Copy !req
315. I can name my price.
Copy !req
316. You know, that's not
only unbelievably evil
Copy !req
317. but you actually put some
thought and effort into it.
Copy !req
318. I'm impressed.
Copy !req
319. I don't know what it is.
Copy !req
320. I guess when people are
miserable and suffering,
Copy !req
321. it brings out the best in me.
Copy !req
322. Thanks for noticing.
Copy !req
323. Hi, guys.
Copy !req
324. Hey, Dabney, did you bring
your Palm Pilot?
Copy !req
325. Yeah. Good to know.
Copy !req
326. Hey, Malcolm,
isn't this great?
Copy !req
327. I wouldn't know.
Copy !req
328. Come on, we get to
hang out in the gym...
Copy !req
329. without worrying
about dodgeballs,
or getting pantsed.
Copy !req
330. It's a dream come true.
Copy !req
331. We actually get to live
in the school.
Copy !req
332. Check this out!
Copy !req
333. It's the key to the
girls' locker room.
Copy !req
334. We were actually standing
Copy !req
335. where girls take
showers... naked.
Copy !req
336. Or so I'm told.
Copy !req
337. Malcolm.
Copy !req
338. No visitors.
Copy !req
339. Malcolm's grounded.
Copy !req
340. You shouldn't be talking to him.
Copy !req
341. Everyone, this is my son.
Copy !req
342. He's being punished.
Copy !req
343. No one should talk to him.
Copy !req
344. Mom, for God's sakes,
they just came over
Copy !req
345. to say hi.
Copy !req
346. I took the key to the
girls' locker room.
Copy !req
347. Please, don't tell
our mothers.
Copy !req
348. I'm so ashamed.
Copy !req
349. What?
Copy !req
350. You did that just
to humiliate me.
Copy !req
351. Is that what you think? Yes.
Copy !req
352. It was completely
unjustified.
Copy !req
353. And I want you to know,
I am never going to forget this.
Copy !req
354. Well, good.
Copy !req
355. It'll be the first time
in ten years
Copy !req
356. the punishment's actually stuck.
Copy !req
357. People, please,
the money we raise
Copy !req
358. cannot bring back his parents
but we must do something.
Copy !req
359. We're his only family now.
Copy !req
360. Hasn't that poor,
little boy suffered enough
Copy !req
361. from the train wreck?
Copy !req
362. Which, by the way is
a surprisingly common occurrence
Copy !req
363. when looked at
in a nationwide context.
Copy !req
364. Please, we've got to give
till it hurts.
Copy !req
365. I'm just saying, it might
be hard to get my hands
Copy !req
366. on five blankets.
Copy !req
367. Look, I need them.
My family's freezing.
Copy !req
368. A lot of people are cold.
Copy !req
369. It's a real problem.
How about the watch?
Copy !req
370. The guy before me
only had to give
you his socks.
Copy !req
371. It's a cold world.
It's getting colder
by the minute.
Copy !req
372. You're an evil,
little punk.
Copy !req
373. Uh-uh.
Copy !req
374. Socks, too.
Copy !req
375. And then Dave told me
they were just studying.
Copy !req
376. But they were totally
having a pizza party.
Copy !req
377. You're kidding?
Copy !req
378. They came to my room
and asked for napkins.
Copy !req
379. It's not like I could
tell them how hurt I
was, 'cause you
Copy !req
380. constantly got to
keep up this front
of being the tough guy.
Copy !req
381. They have no idea
who I really am.
Copy !req
382. If they knew
I kept a dream journal...
Copy !req
383. You do?
Copy !req
384. I think that's so cool.
Copy !req
385. Really?
Copy !req
386. I do, too.
Copy !req
387. I'll tell you one thing,
if those guys ever
Copy !req
388. got a hold of that,
I'd never hear
the end of it.
Copy !req
389. So? You don't have to
care what they think.
Copy !req
390. I don't. Well, what about
your sister?
Copy !req
391. She's an idiot.
Copy !req
392. Hey, good for you.
Copy !req
393. Anyway, people around here
are freaks.
Copy !req
394. Some nights, I lock myself
in my room and spin my globe.
Copy !req
395. And wherever I point my finger,
Copy !req
396. I just pretend
that's where I really live.
Copy !req
397. I do that, too.
Really?
Copy !req
398. And you'll feel the
cold worse than anyone.
Copy !req
399. Because, let's face it,
Copy !req
400. your circulation
isn't that good to begin with.
Copy !req
401. I already gave
you money.
Copy !req
402. And you're satisfied.
I see.
Copy !req
403. That little boy doesn't need
clothes or an education.
Copy !req
404. Let's just put him
to work in the mines
Copy !req
405. like they did
when you were a girl.
Copy !req
406. I'm on a fixed income.
Copy !req
407. So, what are you
trying to do?
Copy !req
408. Take it to the grave
with you?
Copy !req
409. Should we get you
a casket with saddlebags?
Copy !req
410. Give me my shoe.
Copy !req
411. It's right here.
Come and get it.
Copy !req
412. What's the matter?
Copy !req
413. Was somebody
a bad boy?
Copy !req
414. Does the bad boy want
Copy !req
415. his shoe back?
Copy !req
416. Malcolm!
Copy !req
417. Get back on the cot.
Copy !req
418. This kid's got my shoe.
Copy !req
419. Get back on the cot.
Copy !req
420. I'll take care of this.
Copy !req
421. Is Mommy going to
Copy !req
422. take care of it
for you?
Copy !req
423. Malcolm, get back
on that cot.
Copy !req
424. No.
Copy !req
425. Excuse me?
Copy !req
426. I've had it. I quit.
Copy !req
427. What do you
mean, you quit?
Copy !req
428. I quit this stupid system.
Copy !req
429. The only reason I'm being
punished like this
Copy !req
430. is because I agreed
to be punished like this.
Copy !req
431. And I'm not going to
Copy !req
432. agree anymore.
Copy !req
433. This isn't parenting.
This is just sadism.
Copy !req
434. Oh, you think
I enjoy this? Yes, I do.
Copy !req
435. And I am way too old
for this.
Copy !req
436. We are going to find
some other way
Copy !req
437. of dealing
with each other.
Copy !req
438. We are going to change
the rules.
Copy !req
439. What were you
planning to do?
Copy !req
440. Take away my TV
when I'm married?
Copy !req
441. Give me a time-out
when I'm 30?
Copy !req
442. What?
Am I supposed to be scared?
Copy !req
443. What are you going
to do, spank me?
Copy !req
444. Okay.
Copy !req
445. Mom, what are you doing?
Copy !req
446. Mom, cut it out.
Copy !req
447. I don't know what you
think you're doing.
Copy !req
448. How did she get so strong?
Copy !req
449. When I can't do this,
we'll change the rules.
Copy !req
450. Five hundred
Copy !req
451. and sixty-three dollars?
Copy !req
452. Come on, people.
Copy !req
453. What if he needs braces?
What if he has scoliosis?
Copy !req
454. Huh?
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455. Okay, fine.
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456. I'll just say,
"Sorry, little crooked boy.
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457. "You can always get
a job in the circus...
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458. "while the rest of us drive
our Porsches
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459. and eat our T-bone steaks."
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460. Dad, can we go
home now?
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461. My stomach hurts. Not now, son.
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462. That your kid?
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463. Yes, why?
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464. This guy has been
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465. collecting money
for his own kid.
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466. What?
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467. Dewey, did you tell
these people...?
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468. What the hell
you trying to
pull here, mister?
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469. He's been yanking our chain!
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470. No, no, no, no, no. Wait, wait,
wait, wait, wait, wait.
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471. I swear, I didn't know
anything about this.
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472. And if he lied to you,
well, I can assure you
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473. that is not the kind of behavior
I allow in my family.
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474. Ow, ow, ow...
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475. Is this your son?
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476. Reese?
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477. He was running
a black market.
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478. He had two diabetics
bidding against each
other for insulin.
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479. That is a lie.
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480. Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.
Now, now, now, wait
just a second.
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481. I know how this must look.
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482. But if you just give me
the chance
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483. to get to the bottom of this,
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484. I swear to you,
I will make this right.
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485. Come over here.
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486. You boys have both behaved
very badly.
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487. So, you are both going
to apologize
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488. to these nice, generous people
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489. like you have never
apologized before.
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490. Do you hear me?
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491. Okay.
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492. Dewey, come on.
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493. Go ahead.
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494. Nice and loud.
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495. We're sorry we left
the couch on the tracks
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496. and wrecked the train.
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497. Reese, run, run.
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498. Hey, stop him.
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499. Well, this is it.
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500. Maybe I'll call you sometime.
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501. Whatever.
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502. Hey, I, uh...
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503. I actually had
a good time.
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504. Me, too.
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505. You're, like,
a really good
girlfriend.
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506. Thanks.
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507. Hey, sorry about tonight.
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508. Yeah, well, your plan
to palm me off on a 12-
year-old backfired,
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509. 'cause I actually had
a really good time.
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510. Well, good for you,
Poodlehead.
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511. You know what?
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512. I don't care about your
childish taunts anymore.
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513. You can call me
anything you like.
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514. I think I'll stick
with Poodlehead.
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515. Fine.
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516. I'm glad it doesn't bother you
when I call you "Poodlehead,"
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517. Poodlehead.
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518. I got to tell you,
Poodlehead...
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519. Shut up!
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520. Do not set foot
outside this area.
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521. Not one foot.
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522. I would just like
to get one thing clear.
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523. When we go home,
you fellas are still going to be
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524. a presence
in the community, right?
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525. If I wasn't in uniform,
I'd take a swing at you, myself.
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526. Fair enough.
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527. Are you telling me
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528. that I can't discipline
my own child?
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529. Lady, we got a lot
of angry people in there.
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530. I think it's best you
stay out here with the
other troublemakers.
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531. They'd like us to
stay inside the box.
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532. This is outrageous.
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533. We're going to freeze
to death out here.
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534. What did wedo?
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535. Maybe Malcolm can bring us
a couple blankets.
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536. Come on.
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537. Malcolm.
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538. Can you get us some blankets?
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539. Help us out here.
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540. It's cold out here.
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541. I'm sorry, I'm not supposed
to leave my cot.
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542. Don't think you won't suffer the
consequences later, mister.
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