1. I'm Denise.
I'm a survivor of domestic violence.Copy !req
2. Hi, Denise.Copy !req
3. Hi, Denise.Copy !req
4. Does anyone want to share anything today
before we start with our special activity?Copy !req
5. Okay. Then I'll turn this over to Alex.Copy !req
6. Let's give her a warm welcome.Copy !req
7. Thanks, guys.Copy !req
8. I'm Alex and I am a survivor
of domestic violence.Copy !req
9. Hi, Alex.Copy !req
10. I asked Denise
if I could do some volunteer work and...Copy !req
11. I meant cleaning the toilets, but...Copy !req
12. Denise said that I should do this insteadCopy !req
13. and I said "no," and she said "yes,"
and here we are.Copy !req
14. Show them your serial-killer notebook.Copy !req
15. She says my writing looks like
a serial killer's, so...Copy !req
16. Damn, you wrote all that?Copy !req
17. I did. Yes. I wrote this just
since I've been at McMullen House.Copy !req
18. Do any of you guys write for fun?Copy !req
19. Brandi, you do not need
to raise your hand.Copy !req
20. I had a diary in 5th grade.
It was furry and pink.Copy !req
21. It had a little lock on it.Copy !req
22. - Yeah. Me too. I had one of those.
- Mm.Copy !req
23. Here's the hard question.Copy !req
24. Who were you writing to when you wrote?Copy !req
25. Nobody. Just myself.Copy !req
26. Yeah, same.Copy !req
27. Writing is where I go to be honest
about how I feel.Copy !req
28. Sometimes it's really the only way for me
to know what it is that I'm feeling.Copy !req
29. Like I have to write
in order to see what I'm gonna write.Copy !req
30. If that makes any sense.Copy !req
31. But...Copy !req
32. I find that it's a lot easier to write
the truth than it is to say it out loud.Copy !req
33. Nobody can take writing away from you.Copy !req
34. Nobody can tell you that you're wrong,
or your words are wrong.Copy !req
35. Because they're not.Copy !req
36. You're right,
and your words are fucking right.Copy !req
37. Because they're yours.Copy !req
38. Anyway, we all have notebooks and pens.Copy !req
39. Are we gonna read this out loud?Copy !req
40. You can if you want to, but you definitely
don't have to if you don't want to.Copy !req
41. Okay, so I brought some writing promptsCopy !req
42. that I got from a real professor
from the InternetCopy !req
43. that is qualified to be teaching things.Copy !req
44. Okay. Describe a day in your life
that you were really happy.Copy !req
45. It can be a real day
that actually happened.Copy !req
46. Or an imagined day
that you wish would happen.Copy !req
47. I'm gonna put ten minutes on...Copy !req
48. the clock.Copy !req
49. There's no pressure, we're just
writing for the sake of writing.Copy !req
50. That was great.Copy !req
51. - Can I ask something? You have a minute?
- Of course.Copy !req
52. I know the answer to this already,Copy !req
53. but we're not allowed to have
any visitors at the shelter, are we?Copy !req
54. No. I'm sorry, baby girl.Copy !req
55. We can only have individual victims
and their children in shelter.Copy !req
56. - Figured.
- Why?Copy !req
57. Um, I just found out
that my mom's living in a car.Copy !req
58. Sorry to hear that.Copy !req
59. Thanks.Copy !req
60. Is she a victim of DV?Copy !req
61. She's a chronic victim of DV,
but she's also in complete denialCopy !req
62. and delusional and unmedicated, so...Copy !req
63. Is she over 55?Copy !req
64. Mm-hm.Copy !req
65. They have a program called SHARE that
puts homeless folks at senior centers,Copy !req
66. but she has to enroll.Copy !req
67. Yeah. Ah...Copy !req
68. She really hates
everything government-orientedCopy !req
69. and she's on the lam from a psych ward,
so that's not gonna work out.Copy !req
70. Thank you.Copy !req
71. Is there anyone else that
can look after your mom?Copy !req
72. No, I've been taking care of her
since I was 6.Copy !req
73. What would happen if you didn't?Copy !req
74. I think I'll do something,
I don't know,Copy !req
75. something spectacular when I walk in.Copy !req
76. They come in really strong.
Yeah, that's a good idea, so...Copy !req
77. Oh, shit, man.Copy !req
78. - Hey, Mom.
- Alex, hey.Copy !req
79. I thought that was you, I was just driving
home from a clean and I saw your car.Copy !req
80. She's hard to miss.Copy !req
81. - What are you up to out here?
- Oh, well, look at Her Majesty.Copy !req
82. Spring has sprung.Copy !req
83. It's gonna be a cotton-candy sunset,Copy !req
84. and I'm gonna watch
every sugar-coated moment of her.Copy !req
85. Looks like you were talking to the birds.Copy !req
86. Oh, no, honey.Copy !req
87. I downloaded that
dictation app onto my phone.Copy !req
88. Because I'm giving a lecture
on the Neolithic conceptCopy !req
89. of the solar barge to the collective.Copy !req
90. And, um,
I would write this one, but I can't.Copy !req
91. Because my fucking arm's killing me.Copy !req
92. Oh, where's your cast, Mom?Copy !req
93. Where did your cast go?Copy !req
94. Oh.Copy !req
95. It was plastered to your wrist.
Where did it go?Copy !req
96. Uh...Copy !req
97. I had a terrible itch,
so I had Micah saw it off.Copy !req
98. I have to say, it was oddly erotic.Copy !req
99. Are you kidding me?
The cast has to be on for six more weeks.Copy !req
100. - It's fine.
- No, that's not fine.Copy !req
101. You have a severed tendon and now
your tendon is not gonna heal.Copy !req
102. If you're gonna ruin
the cotton candy, you're gonna have to go.Copy !req
103. I'm, um...Copy !req
104. I'm glad that I ran into you.Copy !req
105. I know that you have a great
living situation in your loftCopy !req
106. with your collective, but, um...Copy !req
107. I told you I'm moving to Montana.Copy !req
108. What if you came with me?Copy !req
109. I've got a place on campus.Copy !req
110. You could hang with MaddyCopy !req
111. and you could go on walks
and you could paint all day.Copy !req
112. Watch Maddy start kindergarten.Copy !req
113. Oh, babe, that's not me.Copy !req
114. Why not?Copy !req
115. Because I'm not boring.Copy !req
116. I've got a big life.Copy !req
117. I can't be galloping off behind you,
being a tag along.Copy !req
118. No, Mom. I'm really serious.
I'm inviting you.Copy !req
119. My blood's here, honey.Copy !req
120. My mama's buried here.
Her mama's buried here.Copy !req
121. The Langley women are here.Copy !req
122. I am a Langley woman and I am going.Copy !req
123. I know, baby, and that's you.Copy !req
124. But, uh...Copy !req
125. I can't leave.Copy !req
126. Okay.Copy !req
127. Go to some appointments before I leave.Copy !req
128. - Like the wrist doctor.
- Hard pass.Copy !req
129. I'm making you an appointment
for tomorrow, okay?Copy !req
130. You're gonna meet me there.
Nod that you hear me.Copy !req
131. I don't wanna have to worry
about you when I'm gone, Mom.Copy !req
132. Look at that. Cotton candy.Copy !req
133. We're starting here, and then
we're gonna go over some mountains.Copy !req
134. We're gonna go to Spokane,
which is a really big city.Copy !req
135. Then we're gonna go over more mountains.Copy !req
136. Then over some more mountains.Copy !req
137. All the way to Missoula.Copy !req
138. - Mm-hm.
- Right there.Copy !req
139. Missoula.Copy !req
140. Missoula.Copy !req
141. It's gonna take us this many hours.Copy !req
142. Two. Three. Four. Five.
Six. Seven. Eight. Nine.Copy !req
143. Nine hours.Copy !req
144. And "Shoop."
- Exactly.Copy !req
145. No!Copy !req
146. Hi, I'd like to place an order
for English 102, Block 5, textbook.Copy !req
147. For books?Copy !req
148. Do you have any used copies?Copy !req
149. Great, um, would you mind
setting one of those aside?Copy !req
150. I can be there on Tuesday.Copy !req
151. Thank you.Copy !req
152. - Hey, Tara.
Oh, good, hi.Copy !req
153. Just a quick update for you.Copy !req
154. I just got back from the clerk's office.Copy !req
155. - Uh-oh.
- No, it's fine.Copy !req
156. They objected to the notice of relocation,
which we knew,Copy !req
157. but the motion for the ex parte
emergency custody orderCopy !req
158. has been filed and I also slapped him with
a temporary no-contact order,Copy !req
159. so that ought to make a point.Copy !req
160. - So he can't contact me?
- Correct.Copy !req
161. The sheriff should be serving him
with the restraining orderCopy !req
162. and the ex parte motion this morning.Copy !req
163. Okay. Uh...Copy !req
164. - So, what happens now?
- We wait.Copy !req
165. I left word for Sean's attorney.
We should know more soon.Copy !req
166. Okay, thank you so much.Copy !req
167. Yeah, no problem, bye.Copy !req
168. Brandi, I think you were next, right?Copy !req
169. I don't know if this
is my happiest day ever,Copy !req
170. but it's what came to my mind during then.Copy !req
171. Perfect.Copy !req
172. "I used to go on these walks
with my dad as a kid.Copy !req
173. We'd go in June before
the sticky late-summer heat.Copy !req
174. I'd get one of those Flintstone
orange popsicles from 7-Eleven.Copy !req
175. The kind you have to use
all your might to push up.Copy !req
176. We'd walk along the ocean
looking at the Virgo constellations,Copy !req
177. since my birthday is four days before his.Copy !req
178. My dad would point to the sky and tell meCopy !req
179. he was the Big Dipper
and I was the Little Dipper.Copy !req
180. We stopped
going on our walks when my dad got sick.Copy !req
181. But I went back recently with my son.Copy !req
182. Got him a Flintstone orange Popsicle.Copy !req
183. They're much easier to push up now.Copy !req
184. I looked up at the night sky,
and there it was...Copy !req
185. as if zero time had passed.Copy !req
186. The Big and Little Dipper."Copy !req
187. That's it.Copy !req
188. So of course we wanna keep
everything that we say positive,Copy !req
189. but I was hoping that
we could say some of the imagesCopy !req
190. that are gonna stay with us
from Brandi's story.Copy !req
191. "Sticky late-summer heat."Copy !req
192. "They're much easier to push up now."Copy !req
193. "Zero time had passed."Copy !req
194. "Big and Little Dipper."Copy !req
195. Does anybody else wanna share?Copy !req
196. Please leave a message after the tone.Copy !req
197. Mom.Copy !req
198. Mom!Copy !req
199. Hey, honey.Copy !req
200. Don't. We're going to the doctor.Copy !req
201. - What doctor?
- The doctor that you just stood up.Copy !req
202. She can see you at 4:00,
but we have to leave right now.Copy !req
203. It's Thursday. I didn't say I was going.Copy !req
204. We have the booth on Tuesdays,
Thursdays and Saturdays.Copy !req
205. And I'm not abandoning Micah.Copy !req
206. - Come meet my daughter.
- We met the other day.Copy !req
207. Oh.Copy !req
208. Mom. Please, can we go?Copy !req
209. Uh, why have you got glitter all over?
Did you go to a rave?Copy !req
210. - I cleaned a playroom.
You know what glitter is?Copy !req
211. - It is the lice of the art room.
- You gave me your word. Come on.Copy !req
212. - You spread it wherever you go.
- Would you grow up?Copy !req
213. - We gotta go.
- You're the one with glitter.Copy !req
214. Get in my car and I'm gonna
drive you to the doctor.Copy !req
215. You're not the boss of me. Okay?Copy !req
216. It's my arm that hurts.Copy !req
217. I'll take CBD or go to the doctor
or I'll cut the fucker off.Copy !req
218. Just because you're on some timer
because you're leaving,Copy !req
219. doesn't mean I am. I am fantastic.Copy !req
220. For God's sake,
just worry about somebody else. Please.Copy !req
221. Babe.
- Oh, sorry, honey.Copy !req
222. I'm working. I've got a job here, okay?Copy !req
223. Hi there.Copy !req
224. You got a nice smile. Look at your smile.Copy !req
225. - Tara?
Uh, change of plans.Copy !req
226. Do you think you could meet me
near my office on Whitby?Copy !req
227. Is everything okay?Copy !req
228. I spoke to Sean's attorney.Copy !req
229. They are moving to reject
the ex parte motion altogether,Copy !req
230. citing lack of evidence of abuse.Copy !req
231. And Sean is unwilling
to revise the parenting planCopy !req
232. or give up any of his custodial rights.Copy !req
233. Okay.Copy !req
234. Thanks.Copy !req
235. I'm sorry. So, what does that mean?Copy !req
236. It means that he says you're lying
about being abused.Copy !req
237. So there will be
an adequate-cause hearing in 14 daysCopy !req
238. to determine the validity
of your claims and appropriate custody.Copy !req
239. And it's gonna be
what we call a win-loss case.Copy !req
240. If you lose,
you can't take Maddy anywhere.Copy !req
241. Uh, ever?Copy !req
242. Washington makes it very hard
for victims of DV.Copy !req
243. Particularly in cases of emotional—Copy !req
244. I'm aware, I've been through this and lost
because I didn't have any bruises.Copy !req
245. You're not gonna lose.Copy !req
246. We have 14 days to make a solid case.Copy !req
247. Someone must have seen this guy
emotionally abuse you.Copy !req
248. I don't have 14 days.
I leave for Montana on Monday.Copy !req
249. Legally, you can't go anywhere with Maddy.Copy !req
250. Not before the hearing.Copy !req
251. I am gonna lose my family housing
and my spot in school. I'm...Copy !req
252. - Yes.
- Another one.Copy !req
253. I have to leave the shelter this weekend.Copy !req
254. What do you think that I should do?
I don't have a backup plan here.Copy !req
255. We're gonna fight this.Copy !req
256. I'm gonna get you there by fall semester.Copy !req
257. I just took out a $9000 student loan,
$9000.Copy !req
258. I don't know if you realize,
but this is my fucking life.Copy !req
259. I'm not rich like you and Regina.
I can't repay this.Copy !req
260. There's more.Copy !req
261. Sean is demanding visitation with Maddy.Copy !req
262. No. We have a restraining order, so, no.Copy !req
263. It only applies to you, not to Maddy.Copy !req
264. The court has approved
a four-hour visitation.Copy !req
265. When?Copy !req
266. Tomorrow.Copy !req
267. They will appoint a third party,
neutral supervisor,Copy !req
268. unless you have someone you could use?Copy !req
269. - A grandparent?
- Not doing that.Copy !req
270. I can't do that to her.Copy !req
271. If you don't comply, you will be
in violation of your parenting plan,Copy !req
272. which will not look good
for the hearing in 14 days.Copy !req
273. Alex, I'm sorry that
this is happening, but...Copy !req
274. it's not over.Copy !req
275. It's just a speed bump.Copy !req
276. - Oh.
- It's just me.Copy !req
277. Alex. Shit. Good God.Copy !req
278. You scared the shit out of me.Copy !req
279. What are you doing here?Copy !req
280. I need your help.Copy !req
281. What are you doing here?Copy !req
282. Oh, I had one too many margaritas
and I just pulled over here to...Copy !req
283. sleep it off on the way home.Copy !req
284. - Mom.
- I know this doesn't look good.Copy !req
285. It's just, um...Copy !req
286. the collective gets noisy
and I come here...Copy !req
287. to nap.Copy !req
288. I know you sleep here,
you spend all day in the park alone,Copy !req
289. and that there's no collective.Copy !req
290. Well...Copy !req
291. maybe "collective" isn't the right word.Copy !req
292. You know, we've really got
a nice group of people here.Copy !req
293. Honestly...Copy !req
294. We've got the Flores family over here,
in the van.Copy !req
295. Billy and Anna. I just love them.Copy !req
296. You know, we look out for each other
and it's like a—Copy !req
297. I don't know, a big sleep-out
or a drive-in movie theater.Copy !req
298. We just need popcorn.Copy !req
299. Why can't you take care of yourself?Copy !req
300. What do you mean?
You know, I've got my cooler in here.Copy !req
301. I've got my vitamins, baby.Copy !req
302. Cozy blanket and my fucking good weed.Copy !req
303. - I'm fine.
- You're homeless.Copy !req
304. You're living in your car.Copy !req
305. - Would you just stop?
- No. Please.Copy !req
306. I love my car!Copy !req
307. She's my cobalt bitch.Copy !req
308. - We're like family.
- You're homeless, mom.Copy !req
309. - Would you please just stop!
- You're homeless.Copy !req
310. I'm under the stars. I'm independent.Copy !req
311. And it's not all the time. I mean...Copy !req
312. sometimes I stay with Micah.Copy !req
313. When Alaina-May's not there.Copy !req
314. - Who the fuck is Alaina-May?
- I told you. His wife.Copy !req
315. They broke up, but she still stays there
because she's a feral dumpster fire.Copy !req
316. The point is, honey, I...Copy !req
317. You know, I like being a gypsy.
I like being mobile. Okay?Copy !req
318. You know me. I'm scrappy.Copy !req
319. I don't know. I can't afford to put you
in a motel or bring you to the shelter.Copy !req
320. I don't know.Copy !req
321. I am not your problem, Alexandra.Copy !req
322. - Yes, you are.
- No, I am not.Copy !req
323. - I'm your mother.
- You're not.Copy !req
324. Yes, I am!Copy !req
325. I am!Copy !req
326. You said you needed my help.Copy !req
327. I do.Copy !req
328. So how can I help you, madam?Copy !req
329. Can you supervise a playdate
between Sean and Maddy?Copy !req
330. He gets visitation
and a third party needs to be present.Copy !req
331. Can you do that?Copy !req
332. Yes, I can.Copy !req
333. - At what time should I be there?
- 12:30.Copy !req
334. Don't you worry.Copy !req
335. I will take care of your girl.Copy !req
336. - You're going to the doctor.
- Over my dead body.Copy !req
337. You're going. Everything isn't all right.Copy !req
338. Everything is fucking shit
and you need to be a goddamn adult.Copy !req
339. Your hand looks terrible. You're going!Copy !req
340. Do I get a lollipop?Copy !req
341. Jesus Christ!Copy !req
342. What's that smell coming from your car?Copy !req
343. - It smells like burnt turds.
- You went to the doctor.Copy !req
344. Yeah, look. My finger still works.Copy !req
345. Hey, pumpkin pie.Copy !req
346. You ready for a playdate
with me and your daddy?Copy !req
347. We're gonna have fun.Copy !req
348. I've packed a snack and a change
of clothes and she's had lunch already.Copy !req
349. We've got this. Hi, pumpkin.Copy !req
350. Oh, I know.Copy !req
351. I guess I'll wait here, because I have to.Copy !req
352. Okay, Maddy. So you're gonna be
with Dad for four hours.Copy !req
353. Thanks for sending the cops!Copy !req
354. Very classy!Copy !req
355. And then...Copy !req
356. we'll go and get an
ice cream together. Does that sound good?Copy !req
357. Do you want to get ice cream? Okay.Copy !req
358. - I love you so much.
- Oh!Copy !req
359. - Thanks, Mom.
- Yeah, we're gonna have fun.Copy !req
360. Get your Mad-dog.
You're about to see your daddy.Copy !req
361. Hey!Copy !req
362. Sean-y, you've got your Mad-dog girl here.Copy !req
363. Oh!
Hey, Sean-y boy.Copy !req
364. - She's heavy.
You're getting big.Copy !req
365. She's getting so big.Copy !req
366. We've been swinging
and she can go so high.Copy !req
367. Mad-dog!Copy !req
368. Thank you for coming.Copy !req
369. Of course.Copy !req
370. I was worried about you falling
off the face of the earth like you did.Copy !req
371. You look okay.Copy !req
372. I am okay.Copy !req
373. Good. Where's Maddy?Copy !req
374. I thought maybe I'd get to see her.Copy !req
375. She is at the domestic violence shelter
where I'm living.Copy !req
376. They have a daycare
for their victims, so...Copy !req
377. Oh, okay.Copy !req
378. Well, did you, um—?
Did you order anything yet?Copy !req
379. This is my second time at an emergency
shelter for abused women this year.Copy !req
380. It's the second time
that Sean sent me there.Copy !req
381. Do you hear the words
coming out of my mouth?Copy !req
382. Yes, I hear them.Copy !req
383. And?Copy !req
384. I wish you would have reached out to me.Copy !req
385. Before taking my granddaughter
to a place like that.Copy !req
386. You guys have a place to live.Copy !req
387. I would do anything to help,
you know that.Copy !req
388. I'd give you the shirt off my back,
all right?Copy !req
389. But instead you make me worry.Copy !req
390. You make Sean worry.Copy !req
391. I've been searching
the ferry station floorCopy !req
392. for you guys, Alex.Copy !req
393. Okay.Copy !req
394. Maybe you can help me now.Copy !req
395. Because I do. I need your help.Copy !req
396. Okay.Copy !req
397. I filed for full custody of MaddyCopy !req
398. so that I can take her
to Missoula with me.Copy !req
399. And Sean is objecting to it.Copy !req
400. Yeah, I know.Copy !req
401. Sean told me.Copy !req
402. You know...Copy !req
403. Sean's not doing too good right now.Copy !req
404. I don't care how Sean's doing, Dad.Copy !req
405. My lawyer is building a case to prove
that Sean emotionally abused me.Copy !req
406. And I have to provide evidence,
testimony from people that have seen it.Copy !req
407. Dad...Copy !req
408. will you testify that you saw Sean
emotionally abuse me?Copy !req
409. - When would I have seen that?
- At the trailer.Copy !req
410. - No. That's not what I saw.
- I saw you see it.Copy !req
411. - No, Alex, that's not what I saw.
- You sat there and didn't do a thing.Copy !req
412. If I saw anything,
what I saw was a young coupleCopy !req
413. going through a rough patch.Copy !req
414. Sean is struggling
with his sobriety right now,Copy !req
415. and what he needs is empathy.Copy !req
416. You're walking away from him
at the exact wrong moment.Copy !req
417. I can't be responsible
for Sean any more, Dad.Copy !req
418. I have to do what's best for me,
and I have to do what's best for Maddy.Copy !req
419. He's an alcoholic.Copy !req
420. Okay? He's—Copy !req
421. He's got a disease
that turns him into a monster.Copy !req
422. It's the booze that's the enemy, not him.Copy !req
423. Okay, is it the booze that hit Mom, then?Copy !req
424. - Okay.
- Don't walk out.Copy !req
425. Are you fucking kidding me? No!Copy !req
426. Alex, what do you want me to say?Copy !req
427. I want you to say, "Yes."Copy !req
428. I want you to say,
"Yes, I did hit Mom. I'm sorry."Copy !req
429. I don't remember that.Copy !req
430. You've never been here for me
once in my entire life.Copy !req
431. But I'm asking for you to be, right now.Copy !req
432. I'm always there for you.
For you and Maddy.Copy !req
433. It's just it's...Copy !req
434. Then do this for me.Copy !req
435. Stand up for me.Copy !req
436. Help me protect Maddy.Copy !req
437. Write a testimonial.Copy !req
438. I can't do that.Copy !req
439. Then I guess we don't have much
to say to each other.Copy !req
440. Can you just—?Copy !req
441. "My happiest day is the day
my daughter touched me for the first time.Copy !req
442. I remember it like it was yesterday.Copy !req
443. She was nine weeks old.Copy !req
444. She didn't know I was in hell,Copy !req
445. terrorized day and night by her father.Copy !req
446. To her, I was just the warm,
nice milk lady.Copy !req
447. But this one morning,
when she was nine weeks old,Copy !req
448. we were napping on the floor and I woke upCopy !req
449. because someone was touching me.Copy !req
450. It was her.Copy !req
451. This tiny baby hand
was holding onto my arm.Copy !req
452. She was looking at me,Copy !req
453. expressing unfiltered affection for me.Copy !req
454. This look of trust on her face...Copy !req
455. she saw me and loved me.Copy !req
456. It was the happiest moment of my life.Copy !req
457. That I could be that for someone."Copy !req
458. Thank you, Denise.Copy !req
459. You guys want to say
what images stood out to you?Copy !req
460. "Unfiltered affection."Copy !req
461. "Warm, nice milk lady."Copy !req
462. "Terrorized day and night."Copy !req
463. "Tiny hands."Copy !req
464. Does anybody else want to share?Copy !req
465. Trina.Copy !req
466. Mine's about a girl's night out.
Is that weird?Copy !req
467. - It's— No.Copy !req
468. I didn't write about my kids
like you guys did.Copy !req
469. It's your happy day.
You can write about whatever you want.Copy !req
470. Okay.Copy !req
471. "I was at the bar
with my usual wrecking crew.Copy !req
472. Liv, Amanda and Davina.Copy !req
473. We were slamming drinks,
celebrating something,Copy !req
474. I can't remember what.Copy !req
475. But I'll admit it, I wasn't mad about
how I was looking that night.Copy !req
476. Then this incredibly hot man
came up from behind. His—"Copy !req
477. I'm sorry, I just have
to step out for a second.Copy !req
478. - Keep reading. Thank you so much.
Okay.Copy !req
479. "His name was Neil.
He was dressed very nice..."Copy !req
480. It's okay. It's okay.Copy !req
481. Are you okay? What's going on?Copy !req
482. She just got a little upset, that's all.Copy !req
483. She had a little meltdown
and couldn't recover.Copy !req
484. Isn't that right, pumpkin?Copy !req
485. She just really wanted her mommy.Copy !req
486. Um, Alex, Sean-y dropped us off,
and he wants to talk to you.Copy !req
487. I'm in the middle of class.Copy !req
488. Honey, you need to go talk to him.Copy !req
489. Things did not go well.Copy !req
490. What happened?Copy !req
491. When I told her to get off the swing,
she had a tantrum. She was screaming.Copy !req
492. - She never wants to get off the swings.
- I know, but I fucking couldn't handle it.Copy !req
493. I— I lost my temper, and I yelled at her.Copy !req
494. I haven't had a drink in 24 hours.Copy !req
495. I was trying to be straight
for Maddy, and, uh...Copy !req
496. I'm irritable.Copy !req
497. My skin fucking crawls.Copy !req
498. The sun hurts.Copy !req
499. I'm just rubbed raw.Copy !req
500. I was pushing Maddy on the swings.
She kept saying, "Higher, Daddy, higher."Copy !req
501. And it was nice.Copy !req
502. She was giggling.Copy !req
503. But even then, I was still planning
my next fucking drink.Copy !req
504. I was trying to find some... relief.Copy !req
505. And she had the tantrum,
and I knew that if Paula wasn't there,Copy !req
506. I'd have found a drink with Maddy in tow.Copy !req
507. Just like my fucking mom.Copy !req
508. I don't wanna do that to Maddy.Copy !req
509. I'm signing over full custody to you.Copy !req
510. I just called my lawyer.Copy !req
511. Sorry I'm such a piece of shit.Copy !req
512. You're doing right by her.Copy !req
513. You can come whenever you want,
and get her stuff. I'll box it up for you.Copy !req
514. Thanks.Copy !req
515. Do I have the DTs, or are you sparkly?Copy !req
516. I'm sparkly.Copy !req
517. Nice. Thanks for sharing.Copy !req
518. That was so awesome.Copy !req
519. "Fuck Murphy's Law." I like that line.Copy !req
520. "Punched him like a boxer."
That stood out to me.Copy !req
521. "The cracked nightlight."Copy !req
522. Black, not blue.Copy !req
523. I just loved the whole thing.Copy !req
524. You're a great writer, Edith.Copy !req
525. - Esther.
Oh. Yeah.Copy !req
526. Well, I'm next, right?Copy !req
527. Mom, you didn't write anything.Copy !req
528. Well, I can recite it.Copy !req
529. I'm a great— I'm just great at oration.Copy !req
530. Mother.Copy !req
531. Aww...Copy !req
532. Oh, well. Okay.Copy !req
533. - Will you wait outside? I'm almost done.
- Okay.Copy !req
534. - Bye, ladies.
- Bye.Copy !req
535. - Peace out.
- You're welcome back any time, Paula.Copy !req
536. Oh, thank you so much.Copy !req
537. Yeah.Copy !req
538. Oh, man.Copy !req
539. Here's to getting out of Dodge.Copy !req
540. My man Sean-y looked like shit.Copy !req
541. Your dad shook a lot like that.Copy !req
542. Do you want to tell me your happiest day?Copy !req
543. What?Copy !req
544. The thing we were doing in group.Copy !req
545. You have a day
you remember where you were happy?Copy !req
546. Oh.Copy !req
547. Hands down, our first morning in Alaska.Copy !req
548. We got into Anchorage
in the middle of the night,Copy !req
549. and you were freezing
because I forgot your coat.Copy !req
550. We left your dad's in such a panic.Copy !req
551. I had this cabin for us,
and it didn't have any furniture.Copy !req
552. So, uh...Copy !req
553. I just dumped all the clothes
from the suitcaseCopy !req
554. in the middle of the floor
and made us a bed.Copy !req
555. And we slept there, snuggled up.Copy !req
556. The next morning,
while you were still sleeping,Copy !req
557. I tiptoed outside,Copy !req
558. and I just dove into the snow.Copy !req
559. And I lay there,Copy !req
560. and made a snow angel.Copy !req
561. Because nobody was there
to tell me I was crazyCopy !req
562. or suddenly explode on me.Copy !req
563. It was just me...Copy !req
564. the sun and the snow.Copy !req
565. Anyway, in less than a year,
we were back here,Copy !req
566. and I was broke as shit.Copy !req
567. The whole trip was just dumb.Copy !req
568. No, it wasn't.Copy !req
569. It wasn't dumb.Copy !req
570. You got me away from Dad,
and you never went back to him.Copy !req
571. Uh...Copy !req
572. So, uh...Copy !req
573. So am I still invited to Montana?Copy !req
574. You want to come?Copy !req
575. Yeah.Copy !req
576. Hell yeah, why not?Copy !req
577. I can get a job painting murals,Copy !req
578. find me a mountain man.Copy !req
579. Plus, Maddy needs me.Copy !req
580. She's an artist like me.Copy !req
581. Can you be ready by Monday?Copy !req
582. I'm ready.Copy !req
583. I'm packed, baby.Copy !req
584. That's the nice thing about living
in your car, you're packed.Copy !req
585. I don't know if she's going
to make it to Montana,Copy !req
586. I might have to sell her for parts...Copy !req
587. but I could hitch a ride with you, yeah?Copy !req
588. Yeah.Copy !req
589. - Yeah?
- Yes.Copy !req
590. - Really?
- Of course.Copy !req
591. Oh, my gosh. Yes?Copy !req
592. Maddy!Copy !req
593. Maddy girl, guess what.Copy !req
594. We're going on a road trip!Copy !req
595. Do you want to go
on a road trip with Grammy?Copy !req
596. We're going to go on a road trip!Copy !req
597. Oh, my goodness,
we're going to go on a road trip!Copy !req
598. - Is that it?
- That's it.Copy !req
599. You can come see her as much as you want.Copy !req
600. Yeah, I'm going to get myself cleaned up.Copy !req
601. And then I'll come visit all the time.Copy !req
602. I'm really going to miss her.Copy !req
603. Good luck, Alaska.Copy !req
604. Save the black ones.
- Yes...Copy !req
605. Yeah, and black ones are nice.Copy !req
606. Come on, Maddy.Copy !req
607. This way.Copy !req
608. All right, honey...Copy !req
609. I'll be right back.Copy !req
610. I didn't know you were coming by.
Come on in.Copy !req
611. I can't, I've got Maddy back there.Copy !req
612. I just wanted to come say goodbye.Copy !req
613. I also have been meaning to give you this.Copy !req
614. I'm not sure if I stole it
or what happened, but I had it, so...Copy !req
615. I saw you had it on. Thanksgiving, right?Copy !req
616. I'm really sorry.Copy !req
617. Nah, can't blame a girl
for putting on a little cashmere.Copy !req
618. - So next stop Montana?
- I'm, uh...Copy !req
619. going to pick my mom up
in Port Winslow and get on the I-90.Copy !req
620. - Thank you for being such a good friend.
- You too.Copy !req
621. - Keep the sweater.
- No, no, I'm going to buy my own one day.Copy !req
622. It was $1400.Copy !req
623. I'm keeping it.Copy !req
624. - Mother?
- Oh!Copy !req
625. Hi. Hi, hi.Copy !req
626. Oh!Copy !req
627. Oh, honey, you must be so excited.Copy !req
628. - You said you were going to sell your car.
- I was. I mean...Copy !req
629. I am. But, baby, honey,Copy !req
630. I just have the most incredible news.Copy !req
631. What?Copy !req
632. Micah threw Alaina-May out.Copy !req
633. He threw that feral bitch
to the curb for me.Copy !req
634. And I slept in his bed
last night, in his arms.Copy !req
635. And I'm telling you, honey,
there's sex and then there's...Copy !req
636. Oh, my God, this was on a whole new level.Copy !req
637. Even for me.Copy !req
638. Are you not coming?Copy !req
639. Sweetie, you know, just not right now.Copy !req
640. I mean, I— I can't leave Micah right now,Copy !req
641. I mean, what's going on
between us, you know, baby,Copy !req
642. it's just so powerful and...Copy !req
643. It's just really...Copy !req
644. I can't wait on you, Mom.Copy !req
645. No, you're not.
Of course you're not going to wait on me.Copy !req
646. This is your moment.Copy !req
647. You go, baby doll, and I'll tell you what,
give me the address,Copy !req
648. and I'll be right behind.Copy !req
649. I just— I'll follow you, okay?Copy !req
650. - I don't want to leave you here.
- I know.Copy !req
651. Isn't it funny how these things work out?Copy !req
652. I mean, as soon as I told Micah
I was leaving,Copy !req
653. he realized he had feelings for me.Copy !req
654. I mean, baby, it was, "Boom!"Copy !req
655. And he told Alaina-May
about me and everything.Copy !req
656. Just...Copy !req
657. be happy for me.Copy !req
658. I'm gonna go without you.Copy !req
659. Yes, you're going to go.
Of course you're going to go.Copy !req
660. Sweetheart, this is your adventure.
It's not mine.Copy !req
661. You going to be okay?Copy !req
662. - Come on, you know you love me.
- I do love you.Copy !req
663. - I know you do. Give me a really good hug.
- Okay.Copy !req
664. Oh, God.Copy !req
665. Oh, sweetie.Copy !req
666. - I love you, Mom.
- Yeah, I know, baby.Copy !req
667. Do you guys want to do
a round of snaps for everybody?Copy !req
668. I just want to thank you guys
so much for doing this with me.Copy !req
669. It's been a real honor.Copy !req
670. Thank you.Copy !req
671. Thank you, Alex.Copy !req
672. Wait, we didn't hear your happiest day.Copy !req
673. "My happiest day hasn't happened yet.Copy !req
674. But it's about to.Copy !req
675. On that day, I'm going to get in my carCopy !req
676. that smells like old tuna...Copy !req
677. which will be packed
with all of my belongingsCopy !req
678. and my amazing daughter.Copy !req
679. And I'm going to drive
the fuck out of this town.Copy !req
680. I'm going to drive nine hours,Copy !req
681. 566 miles to Missoula, Montana...Copy !req
682. where I'm going to spend
the next four years...Copy !req
683. learning to be a writer.Copy !req
684. Hopefully, there will be a lot
of happy days during that time.Copy !req
685. And I know there will be some hard ones.Copy !req
686. Most people would bet against a single mom
putting herself through college.Copy !req
687. But they don't know
what it took to get here.Copy !req
688. Three hundred and thirty-eight
toilets cleaned...Copy !req
689. seven types of government assistance...Copy !req
690. nine separate moves...Copy !req
691. one night on the ferry-station floor...Copy !req
692. and the entire third year
of my daughter's life.Copy !req
693. But, when we get to Missoula...Copy !req
694. I'm going to take Maddy
up Sentinel Mountain...Copy !req
695. which looks over the town,
and show her our new home.Copy !req
696. I've been telling her
all about the giant MCopy !req
697. that's at the tippy-top of the mountain.Copy !req
698. That the trail up there
is long and zig-zaggy.Copy !req
699. The hike will be hard.Copy !req
700. But we're going to make it to the top.Copy !req
701. And when we do...Copy !req
702. I'm going to tell her
that the M stands for 'Maddy.'Copy !req
703. That this whole new world is for her."Copy !req
704. Whoo!Copy !req