1. Don't.Copy !req
2. Previously on
AMC's Mad Men...Copy !req
3. Don't what?Copy !req
4. This is the one.Copy !req
5. Who is she?Copy !req
6. She's the soul of the world.Copy !req
7. What does it mean?Copy !req
8. The only thing keeping
you from being happyCopy !req
9. is the belief that
you are alone.Copy !req
10. Do you miss London?Copy !req
11. God, yes.Copy !req
12. Stop telling what to do,
I know what you want.Copy !req
13. So do it.Copy !req
14. I joined the army, Joanie.Copy !req
15. You're gonna be taken care ofCopy !req
16. and I'm gonna be a surgeon.Copy !req
17. Remind me...
when did you stop
taking the pills?Copy !req
18. They ran out on the 2nd.Copy !req
19. I'd say I would
expect to be fertile again
at the end of the cycle,Copy !req
20. Although from my experience
it's more likely a month.Copy !req
21. All this time
I've been afraid to skip oneCopy !req
22. - But it could take a month?
- Why don't you join him
for basic training?Copy !req
23. It would boost
the men's morale.Copy !req
24. From what I remember,
San Antonio is lovely
this time of year.Copy !req
25. We don't know when he's going.Copy !req
26. You've been married
two years, Joan?Copy !req
27. Most gals your age don't wait.Copy !req
28. We have a plan.Copy !req
29. Jojo, I know it's none
of my business,Copy !req
30. But I only went to Korea
because they made me.Copy !req
31. I didn't have
a choice or a wife.Copy !req
32. All I want to know is
if my husband and I
can start a family...Copy !req
33. When my husband
and I can start a family.Copy !req
34. Go get 'em.Copy !req
35. - Walter.
- Yes?Copy !req
36. I just want
to make sure that...Copy !req
37. You know I've had
a couple of procedures.Copy !req
38. I just want to make sure
they don't affect anything.Copy !req
39. A couple?
I only remember one.Copy !req
40. There was one before that.Copy !req
41. Should I be worried?Copy !req
42. Was the other performed
by a physician?Copy !req
43. She said she was a midwife.Copy !req
44. Well, you got pregnant
subsequently,Copy !req
45. And I know everything
went fine hereCopy !req
46. And, physically,
everything looks fine.Copy !req
47. Like the song says,
"whatever will be will be."Copy !req
48. Happy new year.Copy !req
49. Good morning,
Mr. Draper.Copy !req
50. Good morning, Allison.Copy !req
51. - Coffee?
- Yes please.Copy !req
52. Ah. I'm glad
I caught you
before you left.Copy !req
53. The flight's
not until 12:30.Copy !req
54. Well, still you've got
to fight the tourists
for a taxi,Copy !req
55. Then if you hit traffic...
Triborough bridge,Copy !req
56. Somebody's always
running out of gas
and I think you know who.Copy !req
57. So I saw on your way
to Acapulco you have
24 hours in Los Angeles.Copy !req
58. - What do you want?
- The brown derby,Copy !req
59. Bill asher...
he'll probably
try to cast you.Copy !req
60. - Morning, don, Harry.
- Hello.Copy !req
61. - Am I interrupting?
- No.Copy !req
62. I'll see you
at the traffic meeting
this afternoon.Copy !req
63. We're still
doing that? Why?Copy !req
64. Just go to England already.
Stop feeling guilty.Copy !req
65. Take two weeks...
you'll be twice as happy.Copy !req
66. I'm happy when I'm working.Copy !req
67. I'm sure another day
and a half of workCopy !req
68. Will not come close
to the amountCopy !req
69. Of fiddling about you did
in Los Angeles this year.Copy !req
70. Okay.
Happy new year, don.Copy !req
71. Oh, there you are.
Please make sure
he signs these.Copy !req
72. If I don't see you,
happy new year.Copy !req
73. Enjoy your family.Copy !req
74. Would you like
to sign these now?Copy !req
75. Might as well.Copy !req
76. So what will you be doing?Copy !req
77. Don't worry.
I'll be here
till the bitter end.Copy !req
78. No, I mean for new year's.Copy !req
79. I'm gonna go see
my sister in Patterson
over the weekend and...Copy !req
80. I don't know...
probably Times Square.Copy !req
81. I always wondered who did that.Copy !req
82. It was a little
scary last year,Copy !req
83. But I think we'll
have a whole bunch
of girls this time.Copy !req
84. - And sailors.
- I'm sure.Copy !req
85. - but for the rest
of the week,Copy !req
86. If you want me
or someone else on your desk
for West coast hours,Copy !req
87. - I can arrange that.
- I'll be fine.Copy !req
88. Well, I'll let you know
when you should leave.Copy !req
89. Thank you.Copy !req
90. - Why is the door shut?
- I don't like pipe smoke.Copy !req
91. - He's very considerate.
- Could you tell him I'm here?Copy !req
92. What is this regarding?Copy !req
93. Sorry to bother you,
but since Roger's not here,Copy !req
94. I am sending Caroline
uptown to get meCopy !req
95. Some fried chicken for lunch
and I know you like it.Copy !req
96. - Interested?
- I am.Copy !req
97. - Breast? Thigh?
- One of each.Copy !req
98. Oh, I wanted to ask you...Copy !req
99. I would like
to put in a request nowCopy !req
100. For a few days off
the second week of January.Copy !req
101. You have new year's off.Copy !req
102. My husband's a doctor.
His schedule's not flexible.Copy !req
103. Why don't you
go home and ask him
how he would feelCopy !req
104. About some nurse asking
for a holiday immediately
following a holiday?Copy !req
105. I would be happy with two days.Copy !req
106. Our financial planning
and expense budgets
for next year...Copy !req
107. - I'll need you
to assist me.
- We can do it now.Copy !req
108. No one knows why
we're here anyway.Copy !req
109. Because there's work to do.Copy !req
110. And I understand
that all men are dizzy
and powerless to refuse you,Copy !req
111. But consider me
the incorruptible exception.Copy !req
112. Fried chicken indeed.Copy !req
113. I'm sorry.
I shouldn't have asked.Copy !req
114. Don't go and cry about it.Copy !req
115. Excuse me?Copy !req
116. I said don't go
and cry about it.Copy !req
117. Hey.Copy !req
118. - Get off my porch.
- You actually came.Copy !req
119. - What the hell
happened to your leg?
- It's broken.Copy !req
120. It didn't work that well
to begin with.Copy !req
121. How are you?Copy !req
122. Aw. You just need
a little r&r.Copy !req
123. What happened?Copy !req
124. Don't fry eggs in bare feet.Copy !req
125. Sit down.Copy !req
126. - What do you want?
- Half of what you have.Copy !req
127. - You've got a leak.
- I fixed the roof.Copy !req
128. It just needs a little makeup.Copy !req
129. - Call a painter.
- I don't know.Copy !req
130. Once it stopped smelling,
I kind of forgot about it.Copy !req
131. I wondered whose car that was.Copy !req
132. - Hello, dick.
- Hello, patty.Copy !req
133. - It's been too long.
- Stephanie.Copy !req
134. Stephanie.Copy !req
135. Last time I saw you,
you didn't have front teeth.Copy !req
136. They're helping me while
I'm in my fragile state,Copy !req
137. Although no one asked them too.Copy !req
138. - Can I get you something?
- No, we live in South Pasadena.Copy !req
139. It's a long drive.
Are you staying?Copy !req
140. - Just for the night.
- Here?Copy !req
141. Patty, remember you
told me to tell you
if you were intruding?Copy !req
142. Try to keep her off her feet.Copy !req
143. The cast isn't stable
and we don't need
any more accidents.Copy !req
144. Aunt Anna, I just left
everything on the bed.Copy !req
145. I don't know where things go.Copy !req
146. You can tell by looking.Copy !req
147. She's never gotten over
me flunking home-EC.Copy !req
148. dick, fix her a drink.Copy !req
149. - Are you drinking age?
- Yes, but don't bother.Copy !req
150. Stephanie is studying
poly-sci at cal.Copy !req
151. She should be studying music.Copy !req
152. Berkeley?
Are you sitting in?Copy !req
153. I agree with what
they're doing,Copy !req
154. But somebody's
gotta go to class.Copy !req
155. - Steph, are you ready?
- Why don't you two
stay for dinner?Copy !req
156. Glenn and I have
a bridge game
at the Dickson'sCopy !req
157. And he's expecting
a dinner of his own.Copy !req
158. Good, 'cause I only
want her her to stay.Copy !req
159. - How will she get home?
- I have a car.Copy !req
160. Or she'll spend the night.
You can get her
in the morning.Copy !req
161. Okay, you figure it out.
Good night, sweetheart.Copy !req
162. You know I'm very grateful.Copy !req
163. If I don't see you,
dick, happy new year.Copy !req
164. Happy new year.Copy !req
165. I'm going to wash
the road off me,Copy !req
166. And then we are
going to that place
with the beer and abalone.Copy !req
167. Perfect.
Sounds like there's
towels all over the bed.Copy !req
168. - Why am I staying?
- I wanted him to meet youCopy !req
169. And I know you've got grass.Copy !req
170. Hello.Copy !req
171. Ah. Come over here.Copy !req
172. - Is that your dinner?
- I love your chicken.Copy !req
173. - How was the doctor?
- Everything's good.Copy !req
174. Good.
I have to go.Copy !req
175. Let me at least heat it up.Copy !req
176. You can take it with you.Copy !req
177. Peabody's offered
his place in the Poconos
for the 14th and 15th.Copy !req
178. Greg, I can't
get away, not then.Copy !req
179. Joanie, I have
to work new year's.Copy !req
180. I had to trade it for January.Copy !req
181. Then get one of
the Jewish docs to do it.Copy !req
182. - You worked
on their holiday.
- Joanie...Copy !req
183. You don't think
I'd rather be smelling
perfume than Lysol?Copy !req
184. Tell me what you want me to do.Copy !req
185. I guess it's not
your problem too.Copy !req
186. Why don't you just not show up?Copy !req
187. - I'll lose my job.
- We'll make it.Copy !req
188. - Until when?
- Until I leave for basic,Copy !req
189. And then it's just
a couple of weeks
and then I'll be home.Copy !req
190. And then you're
going to Vietnam.Copy !req
191. - We don't know that.
- Oh, that makes me
feel better.Copy !req
192. Just keep marking off
the days on the calendarCopy !req
193. While keep planning
for our future.Copy !req
194. I'll see you tomorrow
when you're on your way out.Copy !req
195. - You don't even know
when you're going!
- Soon.Copy !req
196. - so I'd say Laura was
the worst roommate.Copy !req
197. She had a nervous breakdown.Copy !req
198. One morning she's
reading the bibleCopy !req
199. Instead
of her psych book.Copy !req
200. The next morning
she woke me up,Copy !req
201. Leaning over me
with this crazy smile,Copy !req
202. And said, "morning, Stephanie.Copy !req
203. Have you heard
the good news?"Copy !req
204. There are worse things.Copy !req
205. No, there aren't.Copy !req
206. Where did you go
to school, dick?Copy !req
207. I strung together
a few nonconsecutive yearsCopy !req
208. In night school, city college.Copy !req
209. A self-made man.Copy !req
210. What's it like
taking off your suit
and returning to the wild?Copy !req
211. I really don't
like how political
you're getting.Copy !req
212. I'm not political.Copy !req
213. I just don't understand
who's in charge.Copy !req
214. You're in charge.Copy !req
215. Trust me.
I work in advertising.Copy !req
216. You're kidding me.
It's pollution.Copy !req
217. So stop buying things.Copy !req
218. Don't think
that's not possible.Copy !req
219. I'll say this in termsCopy !req
220. I will be right back
after this brief messageCopy !req
221. From Jan and Dean.Copy !req
222. I like to think I had
a bit of a hand in that.Copy !req
223. you and God.Copy !req
224. Young people are gonna save us.Copy !req
225. How would you feel
about me bringing
the kids out this spring?Copy !req
226. Really?Copy !req
227. You know how badly
I've wanted to meet them.Copy !req
228. So what, I'll be their aunt?Copy !req
229. Wait till they tell Betty that.Copy !req
230. You told me
you told her everything.Copy !req
231. She'll understand.Copy !req
232. I don't think
she'll ever understand.Copy !req
233. You had to know she'd be hurt.Copy !req
234. After I told her
I felt... Relieved.Copy !req
235. I kept thinking
how small it wasCopy !req
236. - Compared to
how long it went on.
- Small?Copy !req
237. I know. I...Copy !req
238. It's just...Copy !req
239. I could tellCopy !req
240. The minute she saw
who I really was...Copy !req
241. She never wanted
to look at me again.Copy !req
242. Which is why I never told her.Copy !req
243. I'm sorry she broke your heart.Copy !req
244. I ought I'd play something
so you two could dance.Copy !req
245. How the hell am I gonna dance?Copy !req
246. I don't know how
you ever danced to this.Copy !req
247. Come on.Copy !req
248. Keep your hands
at 100 and 2:00.Copy !req
249. So you picked this song
because it's old?Copy !req
250. That doesn't mean it's bad.Copy !req
251. It's kind of corny.Copy !req
252. I think it sounds
like she's inviting usCopy !req
253. To a very beautiful placeCopy !req
254. Where there's
no surfing at all.Copy !req
255. Have you ever been there?Copy !req
256. Mmm, no.Copy !req
257. But... Every time
I hear this song,Copy !req
258. I want to go.Copy !req
259. I know for a fact
you did not break
that leg making eggs.Copy !req
260. I used to love sitting,Copy !req
261. And now that I have to,
I hate it.Copy !req
262. I should get home.Copy !req
263. I'll drive you.
I'll put the top up.Copy !req
264. That's okay.
I'll hitch.Copy !req
265. I do it all the time.Copy !req
266. You'll get picked up
by some creep.Copy !req
267. I guess this is safer.Copy !req
268. So are you married or divorced?Copy !req
269. Couldn't I just be single?Copy !req
270. no.Copy !req
271. I mean I'd be surprised.Copy !req
272. I'm divorced.Copy !req
273. Do you go on those dates
where you sit thereCopy !req
274. And ask each other questions?Copy !req
275. It's a means to an end.Copy !req
276. But nobody knowsCopy !req
277. What's wrong with themselves...Copy !req
278. And everyone else
can see it right away.Copy !req
279. thank you very much.Copy !req
280. It was my pleasure.Copy !req
281. So what time's
your flight tomorrow?Copy !req
282. Noon.Copy !req
283. Unless you think
I should change it.Copy !req
284. What are you doing?Copy !req
285. I don't know.Copy !req
286. You're so beautiful and young.Copy !req
287. Anna and I never hadCopy !req
288. A romantic relationship.Copy !req
289. But you love her.Copy !req
290. For lots of reasons...Copy !req
291. And in a very different way.Copy !req
292. I have to tell you somethingCopy !req
293. And I probably shouldn't.Copy !req
294. I promised...Copy !req
295. I wouldn't,Copy !req
296. But I see you two togetherCopy !req
297. And I know I have to.Copy !req
298. Okay.Copy !req
299. Anna is...Copy !req
300. She has cancer.Copy !req
301. - What?
- It's why
she broke her leg.Copy !req
302. It's in her bones.
It's all over her body.Copy !req
303. I'm sorry.Copy !req
304. Cancer. Shit.Copy !req
305. I'm so sorry.Copy !req
306. Of course she's not
gonna say a damn thing.Copy !req
307. She doesn't know.Copy !req
308. - What?
- The doctors saidCopy !req
309. She doesn't have long,
so there's no reason
to tell her.Copy !req
310. Some quacks out in Pedro?
What are you going
to do about it?Copy !req
311. My mom got a consultation.Copy !req
312. Your mother does not
get to decide that.Copy !req
313. Please don't make me sorry
that I told you.Copy !req
314. I didn't want you to leave hereCopy !req
315. And not know.Copy !req
316. Good morning.Copy !req
317. I woke up in a panicCopy !req
318. Because I thought
I might've missed you.Copy !req
319. But it doesn't look
like you're ready to go.Copy !req
320. I thought I'd stay
a little longer
if it's okay.Copy !req
321. Hell yes.
Stay as long
as you want.Copy !req
322. We'll see.Copy !req
323. If I had rolled over on this,Copy !req
324. I would've had
to smoke the dress.Copy !req
325. How'd you sleep?Copy !req
326. I was feeling no pain,
as they say.Copy !req
327. In fact, I don't know
if I would've woken upCopy !req
328. If I hadn't heard
that jet fly by.Copy !req
329. And I thought, "oh my god.
Dick left already."Copy !req
330. There's all kinds
of aircraft here, you know.Copy !req
331. If we stay up tonight
and we get lucky,Copy !req
332. We'll see something
you'll remember.Copy !req
333. if we keep smoking that.Copy !req
334. I've seen u.F.O.S.Copy !req
335. There was a lot going on
during the missile scare,Copy !req
336. But it was different.Copy !req
337. You saw a u.F.O.?Copy !req
338. Mm-hmm. You don't have
to do that, you know.Copy !req
339. I want to.Copy !req
340. I'm not gonna fight
watching dick WhitmanCopy !req
341. Paint my living room
in his shorts.Copy !req
342. I'm so damn proud of you.Copy !req
343. I count on that.Copy !req
344. Does that scare you?Copy !req
345. The idea
of another civilization
on another planetCopy !req
346. Smart enough to find
a way to get here?Copy !req
347. It doesn't scare me,Copy !req
348. But the odds are against it.Copy !req
349. Well, I saw
something onceCopy !req
350. And I'm telling you
it knocked me sideways.Copy !req
351. I started thinking
of everything I was
sure was trueCopy !req
352. And how flimsy it all might be.Copy !req
353. You don't need to see
a u.F.O. To know that.Copy !req
354. That's not a great way
to think about things.Copy !req
355. I know everything
about youCopy !req
356. And I still love you.Copy !req
357. Are you just gonna
paint that corner?Copy !req
358. 'cause a patch
of new paint is just
as bad as a stain.Copy !req
359. What the hell
is going on?Copy !req
360. - You're gonna get arrested.
- No, you are.Copy !req
361. - That's breaking and entering.
- I thought you had
a flight to catch.Copy !req
362. I changed my plans.Copy !req
363. You just can't keep
your pants on, can you?Copy !req
364. You never know what's
gonna set her off.Copy !req
365. - I need to talk to you.
- I bet.Copy !req
366. I heard you car
pull up at 2:30.Copy !req
367. - She's half your age.
- What's your plan?Copy !req
368. Just gonna let her
wake up one day in agony
and you tell her it's over?Copy !req
369. I'm going to assume
that you've done everythingCopy !req
370. In your limited means,
but I'm here now.Copy !req
371. She's gonna see
some real doctorsCopy !req
372. And she's not gonna
live in the dark.Copy !req
373. We showed the x-rays
to specialists... everybody.Copy !req
374. - It's very advanced.
- Specialists?Copy !req
375. - You don't think she knows
something's going on?
- She had polio.Copy !req
376. She's been going to doctors
since she was eight.Copy !req
377. Maybe... I don't know.Copy !req
378. She hasn't let on,
so this is the way
it's gonna be.Copy !req
379. I understand
you feel guilty,
but don't.Copy !req
380. Go to Acapulco.
There's nothing
for you to do here.Copy !req
381. She is very
important to me.Copy !req
382. I'm gonna do what I have to.Copy !req
383. You have no say
in the affairs
of this family.Copy !req
384. You're just a man in a roomCopy !req
385. With a checkbook.
I'm sorry.Copy !req
386. Please do the decent thing.Copy !req
387. The longer you're here,Copy !req
388. The more likely you are
to say something.Copy !req
389. She thinks you brought
the pot, I bet.Copy !req
390. If it wasn't for my niece,Copy !req
391. We'd have killed
each other by now.Copy !req
392. She means well
and she's family.Copy !req
393. I wouldn't have picked her.Copy !req
394. I'm just sayingCopy !req
395. Not everybody has that.Copy !req
396. You have your kids.Copy !req
397. I bet that's better.Copy !req
398. It's different.Copy !req
399. I have to tell you something.Copy !req
400. What's wrong?Copy !req
401. I have to go.Copy !req
402. I'm sorry.Copy !req
403. I... I thought
I could stay,
but I can't.Copy !req
404. Oh, I don't care.Copy !req
405. I want you to.Copy !req
406. I want you
to do everything
you want to do.Copy !req
407. I'll bring the kids
out at Easter.Copy !req
408. We'll go to Catalina,
see the bison.Copy !req
409. Acapulco.Copy !req
410. Do you think
there's more Mexicans
here or there?Copy !req
411. Joan.Copy !req
412. Open it.Copy !req
413. They're beautiful.Copy !req
414. It's so encouraging
to see someone happily
married around here.Copy !req
415. Peggy, why don't you go home?Copy !req
416. - I'll tell everyone you have
something important to do.
- Really?Copy !req
417. - I have to buy a dress.
- Oh.Copy !req
418. New year's eve,
big group of girls,Copy !req
419. - You'll want to stand out.
- No, I'm spending it with mark.Copy !req
420. My boyfriend?Copy !req
421. happy new year.Copy !req
422. Excuse me.Copy !req
423. "darling, I've been an ass.Copy !req
424. - Kisses, lane"?
- What?Copy !req
425. I am not your darling
and I don't want your kisses.Copy !req
426. - What?
- I thought American men
were bad enough,Copy !req
427. But none of them has
ever so consistentlyCopy !req
428. Made me feel
like a helpless,
stupid little girl.Copy !req
429. Calm down.
I did send you flowers,Copy !req
430. But I also sent flowers
to my wife in London.Copy !req
431. The sentiments
were very different,
I assure you. Sandy!Copy !req
432. Um, is everything okay?Copy !req
433. - Yes.
- Just get back to work.Copy !req
434. Sandy!Copy !req
435. Did it ever occur
to you how sensitive
these deliveries were?Copy !req
436. How often do I send flowers?Copy !req
437. I ordered the flowers
from Rhinelander's.Copy !req
438. They assured me
they were going to contact
your florist in London,Copy !req
439. And somehow
they mixed them up.
It's not my fault.Copy !req
440. Sandra,
everyone makes mistakes,Copy !req
441. But the fact that you're
the kind of person who cannot
accept blame is egregious.Copy !req
442. I don't know what that means.Copy !req
443. It means I can't believe
I hired you.Copy !req
444. You had one simple task.Copy !req
445. I don't even know
if I can call to apologize.Copy !req
446. What exactly did
Mrs. Harris's note say?Copy !req
447. It said, "Joan,
forgive me. Lane."Copy !req
448. You're fired.
Go get your things.Copy !req
449. You'll be paid through
the end of the year.Copy !req
450. Those instructions
you understood!Copy !req
451. I'll have Megan clean this up.Copy !req
452. - What are you doing?
- You inspired me.Copy !req
453. Would you like
to sign your work?Copy !req
454. - Really?
- Pick a spot on the wall.Copy !req
455. You should swim as much
as you can there.Copy !req
456. It'll clear your head.Copy !req
457. And no cliff diving.Copy !req
458. Hey.
You'll be fine.Copy !req
459. You'll make the best of it.Copy !req
460. You always do.Copy !req
461. You know you can call me
if you need anything.Copy !req
462. - Goodbye, Anna.
- Goodbye, dick.Copy !req
463. Mr. Draper?Copy !req
464. Mr. Draper?Copy !req
465. Happy new year.Copy !req
466. Happy new year.Copy !req
467. hey, what are you doing up?Copy !req
468. I figured since
we missed it here,Copy !req
469. We could celebrate it
in Hawaii.Copy !req
470. Oh, look at that.Copy !req
471. I'm sorry.
I ate dinner at 3:00.Copy !req
472. A bowl of cottage cheese
in the cafeteria?Copy !req
473. How about a glass
of fresh-squeezed
orange juice?Copy !req
474. Sure. The nurses
spent five minutesCopy !req
475. Trying to get this girl's
contact lenses out.Copy !req
476. She was screaming.
It turns outCopy !req
477. Her friend was the one
with the contact lenses.Copy !req
478. Oh! God!Copy !req
479. Oh God.Copy !req
480. - Let me see.
- I cut it really bad, Greg.Copy !req
481. - It really hurts.
- Jesus.Copy !req
482. Hold this.Copy !req
483. Just take me to the hospital.Copy !req
484. Sit down.Copy !req
485. - Greg, you don't
have to do this.
- Would you stop?Copy !req
486. Isn't there some
medical ethical lawCopy !req
487. - Against operating
on your wife?Copy !req
488. I want you to calm down.Copy !req
489. For me, this is like...Copy !req
490. I don't know...
filing some papers
is for you.Copy !req
491. I do it all the time.Copy !req
492. I don't do that anymore.
I have other people do that.Copy !req
493. It's really throbbing.
Let me get my coat.Copy !req
494. Hey, since when have
we had that bird's
nest on the ceiling?Copy !req
495. I usually save that for kids.Copy !req
496. Now don't move.Copy !req
497. One hillbilly says
to the other,Copy !req
498. "you wanna play
20 questions?"Copy !req
499. The other hillbilly says,
"what is that?"Copy !req
500. He says, "I write somethingCopy !req
501. On a piece of paper,Copy !req
502. "And you get 20 questions
to guess what it be."Copy !req
503. So he takes out
a piece of paperCopy !req
504. And writes "donkey damn" on it.Copy !req
505. The other hillbilly takes
a second to think and asks,Copy !req
506. "can you eat it?"Copy !req
507. The other hillbilly says,Copy !req
508. "I might reckon
you could."Copy !req
509. The other one says,Copy !req
510. "is it donkey damn?"Copy !req
511. Cohen told me that.Copy !req
512. Aw, come on. It's fine.Copy !req
513. I'm not crying 'cause it hurts.Copy !req
514. Everything's gonna be okay.Copy !req
515. When?Copy !req
516. Joanie.Copy !req
517. I can't fix anything else,Copy !req
518. But I can fix this.Copy !req
519. Hello?Copy !req
520. Hello?Copy !req
521. I thought you were in Acapulco.Copy !req
522. I didn't feel like it.Copy !req
523. You should be in England
with your family.Copy !req
524. Oh, too much to do.Copy !req
525. They'll be back soon enough.Copy !req
526. I have a sandwich
in the refrigerator.Copy !req
527. It's very large.Copy !req
528. No thank you.Copy !req
529. - Do you mind?
- Help yourself.Copy !req
530. - I received somethingCopy !req
531. Rather special
from my father
for my birthday.Copy !req
532. - What is it?
- Who knows?Copy !req
533. He's one of those alcoholicsCopy !req
534. Who thinks
that he's collecting.Copy !req
535. Chin-chin.Copy !req
536. - There's no...
- no bite at all.Copy !req
537. - well...Copy !req
538. - ... I will let you get back
to your business.Copy !req
539. - Ah.
- I made a discoveryCopy !req
540. As I slowly pulled back
from the records.Copy !req
541. I can't take
any more bad news, lane.Copy !req
542. Although things are
precarious financially,Copy !req
543. It's been a magnificent year.Copy !req
544. lane!Copy !req
545. what?Copy !req
546. Come here.Copy !req
547. We're going to the movies.Copy !req
548. Do you think we should?Copy !req
549. Does howdy doody
have a wooden dick?Copy !req
550. "Zorba the Greek"...
seen it, but would
see it again.Copy !req
551. "it's a mad mad mad world."Copy !req
552. No kidding.Copy !req
553. - "send me no flowers."
- no.Copy !req
554. "the guns of August."Copy !req
555. I hate guns and I hate August.Copy !req
556. It's all over the rug.Copy !req
557. We'll have to smoke the dress.Copy !req
558. I don't know that one.Copy !req
559. "the umbrellas
of Cherbourg."Copy !req
560. Catherine Deneuve.Copy !req
561. Apparently it's for
all the young lovers
of the world.Copy !req
562. This movie is very good.Copy !req
563. You know what's
going on here, don't you?Copy !req
564. - Handjobs.
- Is that right?Copy !req
565. What percentage do you think?Copy !req
566. Do you mind?Copy !req
567. Monster!Copy !req
568. You like it here.Copy !req
569. I do. I do.Copy !req
570. Even alone.Copy !req
571. You remind me of a chap
I knew in school.Copy !req
572. We followed him around
in a packCopy !req
573. And he didn't notice
we were there.Copy !req
574. He died in a motorcycle crash.Copy !req
575. Mmm.
Rebecca convinced meCopy !req
576. That you were all
on holiday together...Copy !req
577. Without me.Copy !req
578. I suppose we haven't
been very welcoming.Copy !req
579. Campbell's friendly,Copy !req
580. Although I believe
unintentionally.Copy !req
581. But my wife is
quite severe with people,Copy !req
582. Including me.Copy !req
583. I'm sorry to hear that.Copy !req
584. I, um...Copy !req
585. I wanted to bring our familiesCopy !req
586. To New York for the holidays,Copy !req
587. But she was terribly homesick.Copy !req
588. We had an argument...Copy !req
589. A series of arguments...Copy !req
590. And she left.Copy !req
591. I then weakened
and sent her flowers.Copy !req
592. Huh.
Tried to, anyway.Copy !req
593. Then we had a rather
solemn phone callCopy !req
594. In which she told me
she was not returning.Copy !req
595. Then she put
my son on the phone.Copy !req
596. That's tough.Copy !req
597. How did you know
when you were done?Copy !req
598. It wasn't my decision.Copy !req
599. And I've learned the hard wayCopy !req
600. Not to give advice
in these situations.Copy !req
601. You were
supposed to tell me
to get on a plane.Copy !req
602. Is that what you want?Copy !req
603. Or is that what
people expect of you?Copy !req
604. I want my beef.Copy !req
605. Ah. Here it is.Copy !req
606. I, uh,Copy !req
607. Was going to call
a lady friend of mine.Copy !req
608. I'm supposed
to meet her downtown.Copy !req
609. Do you want her
to bring a friend?Copy !req
610. Oh, no no.
No thank you.Copy !req
611. What are you gonna do?Copy !req
612. We can pretend it's new year's.Copy !req
613. It actually is.Copy !req
614. If you don't mind.Copy !req
615. It's the least I can do.Copy !req
616. - I'm not hungry.
- What? Not hungryCopy !req
617. For this...Copy !req
618. - Beautiful piece
of American meat?Copy !req
619. I got a big Texas belt buckle!Copy !req
620. - Yeehaw!Copy !req
621. I'm thinking,
"did my mother get suspicious
and call the fuzz?"Copy !req
622. "we know you're
practicing self-abuse.Copy !req
623. Please come out
with your hand up."Copy !req
624. Aw. I see we have
an anniversary
here tonight.Copy !req
625. Look at these two...
George and Martha.Copy !req
626. Tell me, what's it like
when your eyes meet across
a crowded men's room?Copy !req
627. Wall street,
does it bother your parents
that he's so ugly?Copy !req
628. At the end of the nightCopy !req
629. When it's just
the two of you,
who picks up the check?Copy !req
630. We're not homosexuals!
We're divorced!Copy !req
631. don't.Copy !req
632. Oh man. Now they're
gonna fight in the car
all the way home.Copy !req
633. "honey, why'd you provoke
the comedian?"Copy !req
634. Okay, now welcome
a talented young musicianCopy !req
635. Whose mother says
he's the next Bob Dylan.Copy !req
636. Yeah.Copy !req
637. Candice, this is lane.Copy !req
638. And this is my friend Janine.Copy !req
639. - Hello.
- A pleasure.Copy !req
640. I guess I was wrong.
You're not queers.Copy !req
641. You're rich.Copy !req
642. A warm welcome
for Rudy Jenson.Copy !req
643. - You ladies look lovely.
- Why thank you.Copy !req
644. It's true.Copy !req
645. I love this song.Copy !req
646. Really?
He wrote it.Copy !req
647. Don't.
She'll believe anything.Copy !req
648. - What?Copy !req
649. Let's get out of here.Copy !req
650. You have no mixers
at all and no food.Copy !req
651. I love your apartment.Copy !req
652. It's very manly.Copy !req
653. It came this way.Copy !req
654. I think Norman mailer
shot a deer over there.Copy !req
655. I love deer.Copy !req
656. Get your tail
in here and help me.Copy !req
657. she seems to know her way
around in your kitchen.Copy !req
658. What's that like?Copy !req
659. I told you I don't likeCopy !req
660. Giving advice
in these situations.Copy !req
661. Why don't you show me around?Copy !req
662. I suppose I am
a bit curious myself.Copy !req
663. Not in there.Copy !req
664. What happened to Acapulco?Copy !req
665. She does not go to Barnard.Copy !req
666. Guys like him like that.Copy !req
667. Come on. Let's go
in the other room.Copy !req
668. No. Here.Copy !req
669. - Morning.
- Morning.Copy !req
670. I'm terribly thirsty.Copy !req
671. We'll have coffee in a minute.Copy !req
672. Just a glass of water, please.Copy !req
673. What do I owe you
for the evening?Copy !req
674. - Don't worry about it.
- I should pay.Copy !req
675. The girl...
how much was she?Copy !req
676. $25.Copy !req
677. Fascinating.Copy !req
678. Here's $30.Copy !req
679. Well, I shall be running along.Copy !req
680. Thank you for
the welcome distraction.Copy !req
681. sorry.Copy !req
682. All right. Gentlemen,
shall we begin 1965?Copy !req