1. We interrupt this program
with some breaking news.
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2. Russell brand tweets a photo of
Katy Perry without her makeup.
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3. Woof!
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4. Is it Valentine's Day
or Halloween?
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5. Either way,
there will be chocolate.
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6. We now return you to your
regularly scheduled program.
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7. Mad!
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8. Wow!
I just got a major shock!
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9. Feeling the lightning
hit this crate?
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10. Hearing Lindsay Lohan
still has a career.
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11. Unh.
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12. I've brought you all to my park
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13. because you're the foremost
Pokémon experts in the world.
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14. Misty, you've won
more Pokémon tournaments
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15. than any person alive.
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16. Ash here has written 5 books on
the impact of Pokémon games.
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17. Yeah. Uh, "Pocket Monsters"
is actually the, uh,
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18. proper, uh, nomenclature.
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19. Finally, we have Jesse and James.
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20. Uh, why are
you two here, exactly?
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21. Uh, definitely not to steal
the secrets of Pokémon Park.
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22. Uh, yeah. I don't even know
why you'd ask that.
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23. Welcome to Pokémon Park.
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24. Yeah. This charmander
may be harmless now,
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25. but what happens when
it evolves into charizard?
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26. Please Pokémon can't evolve
on this island.
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27. They stay
cute and adorable forever.
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28. Not you. Everyone hates you.
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29. Yes. Well, obviously, that dumb
fish will stay stupid and harmless.
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30. But what about the others?
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31. Pokémon won't evolve
unless they fight.
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32. And Pokémon here don't fight.
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33. Quick! Put him back
in the poké ball!
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34. Wha? Where are the balls?
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35. Yeah. We got their balls.
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36. Stop laughing.
Just have our money.
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37. Oh! Good.
It's just you,
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38. you stupid fish.
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39. Aah!
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40. Uh, nice fire-type Pokémon.
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41. Aah!
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42. It's ok. It's ok.
A charizard, uh,
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43. definitely can't, uh, open doors.
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44. - We're saved!
- Uh, do you think he remembers
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45. when I called him stupid?
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46. I'm going to say yes.
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47. - It's out of fuel.
- Mine isn't.
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48. Well, I guess Pokémon and man
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49. were never meant
to walk the earth together.
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50. Just be glad
we weren't on Yu-gi-oh! Island.
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51. - Why? What's that like?
- Pretty much the same,
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52. only more complicated
and less fun.
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53. Oh, yes, yes,
like Digimon island.
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54. Exactly.
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55. I don't care what you say.
I'm not coming in.
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56. For the millionth time,
I won't bite you.
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57. I just want the mail.
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58. Just say you promise
you won't bite me.
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59. I promise I won't bite you.
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60. Uhh!
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61. Idiot.
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62. d Slop n' Shop,
your favorite grossery store d
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63. On sale this week
at Slop n' Shop,
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64. - Mac & sneeze!
- Ah-choo!
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65. Fish sticks...
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66. Troll house cookies...
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67. Ha ha ha!
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68. Goat meal...
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69. And jiffy poop.
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70. d Slop n' Shop,
your favorite grossery store d
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71. The green giant?
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72. Who did you think would live
at the top of a beanstalk?
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73. Well, do you have a goose
that lays golden eggs?
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74. No, I've got spinach.
You want some spinach?
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75. Forget this noise.
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76. Most people are excited
when I offer them spinach.
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77. That's a lie!
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78. And now the top candy hearts
you don't want to get.
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79. "Wanna hug?
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80. I'm not contagious anymore."
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81. "4 ever.
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82. Or at least until senior year."
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83. "Kiss me.
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84. I already told everyone
you did."
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85. "Hugs and kisses
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86. are all I can afford."
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87. "I love you!
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88. Unless that Lisa girl
changes her mind."
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89. We have an attic?
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90. Mad, mad, mad, mad.
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91. This fall,
the creators of "Lost,"
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92. "FlashForward," and something
else that came and went,
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93. bring you the TV show
to end all TV shows.
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94. Get ready for "The Thingy."
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95. Starring Will Smith...
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96. This is no ordinary thingy.
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97. Angelina Jolie...
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98. - Who would do such a thingy?
- Alec Baldwin...
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99. - I have some thingy to tell you.
- And Will Smith...
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100. Hang on.
Wasn't I just down there?
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101. Leonardo DiCaprio
thinks he knows.
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102. It's some sort of thingy.
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103. Shia LaBeouf thinks he knows.
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104. Dude, this thingy
is totally like a thingy.
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105. And Jessica Simpson
doesn't know what to think.
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106. Y'all ever eat a book?
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107. You'll never believe
what the thingy is.
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108. - Can I guess?
- You're not allowed to.
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109. I'm not allowed to guess?
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110. All I can say is...
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111. Yes?
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112. - Nope, I can't even say that.
- Ohh! Man.
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113. But you do not want to miss
"The Thingy."
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114. When is it on?
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115. On a night
so mysterious, it'll...
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116. Hang on a second.
Actually, I can't remember.
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117. Let me check my notes.
Let's see. Uh,
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118. what have we got here?
Will Smith, Angelina Jolie,
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119. blah, blah, blah, wow.
What is she doing in this mess?
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120. Uh, ok. Yeah.
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121. "The Thingy"... Coming soon...
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122. Ish. Or some... Thingy.
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123. I don't think they've
written it yet, to be honest.
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124. Mad!
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125. I can't breathe!
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126. Somebody get me out!
It's an emergency!
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127. Ha ha ha!
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128. Ooh, a package!
Who's it from?
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129. Uh, Mr. Frank Retriever.
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130. Frank Retriever? Hmm.
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131. Uhh!
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132. Frank Retriever... Really?
You so deserve this.
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133. Man, I told you this
wasn't real. You're so stupid!
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134. Oh, I'm stupid? Says the guy who
thought there would be jewels
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135. at the bottom
of that sunken boat?
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136. Sick of being
a 90-pound weakling?
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137. Introducing "Donkey Strong,"
the new workout program
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138. from Donkey Kong.
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139. Hi. I'm Donkey Kong.
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140. And I'm here to help you
build muscle
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141. by lifting barrels
and throwing barrels.
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142. With "Donkey Strong,"
you'll go from looking like this
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143. to this.
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144. So, you promise to follow
these simple exercises,
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145. I promise I'll make a monkey
out of you.
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146. Our 27-DVD series allows you
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147. to get in shape in class,
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148. at the mall,
and even at the pool.
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149. - Uhh!
- We'll also throw in
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150. this bonus cardio DVD,
"Running from Hammers."
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151. The new "Donkey Strong"
exercise video, from me,
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152. Donkey Kong. What a workout.
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153. "Donkey Strong."
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154. Earl. Earl!
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155. Wake up!
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156. B-b-b.
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157. You're tightrope-walking again.
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158. Aah!
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159. Marry me, please, maid Marian.
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160. But I don't love you, Robin Hood.
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161. Aah!
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162. Oh, man!
Are those your arrows?
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163. Wow, is my face red.
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164. You really should start using
different-looking arrows.
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165. First off, I want
to thank you for coming.
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166. Between losing my ball and this
new diet they've got me on,
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167. I... Well, I haven't
been myself lately.
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168. And I hope that you'll
accept this as my apology.
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169. A new mailbag.
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170. And I had it
monogrammed, see? "MM."
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171. - My name is Alan.
- Oh, really?
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172. Heh. This whole time,
I thought it was Mailman.
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173. - Thanks.
- The least I could do.
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174. Well, if you'll excuse me,
I gotta hit the hydrant.
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175. Mmm, special dessert
for the gentleman.
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176. I didn't order... Uhh!
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177. Heh heh!
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178. I knew your name was Alan.
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179. Scalpel.
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180. Clamp.
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181. Chair. Grr!
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182. What kind of hospital is this?
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183. Strap yourself to a gurney
and prepare to be misdiagnosed,
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184. because this is the WWER.
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185. Now, last week in the WWER,
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186. we saw Quadruple H
give a quadruple bypass.
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187. Uh, I'm down here.
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188. The feud between Alicia Crocks
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189. and Eve-il heated up.
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190. I saw ya makin' out
with Dr. Bronson.
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191. Keep your meat hooks off.
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192. - I'll show you meat hooks.
- Aah!
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193. And Coffee Blinkston
saved another life.
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194. - Uhh!
- Moondrop.
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195. Right now, let's check out
the action in room 8476,
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196. patient Hector Gonzales.
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197. You have nothing to
worry about, Mr. Gonzales.
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198. The doctor performing
your appendectomy is
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199. a real superstar!
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200. Making his way to the E.R.,
from Dublin, Ireland,
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201. weighing in at 272 pounds,
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202. Lemus!
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203. I'm gonna rip out your appendix!
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204. Is that covered
under my insurance?
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205. Anesthesiologist, knock him out.
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206. Now it's the moment
we've all been waiting for,
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207. the main event of the night...
a steel cage operation
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208. between old-time rivals
the Big Schmo and Jerk Swagger.
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209. I don't know about you, but
I'm on the edge of my bedpan.
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210. Jerk Swagger, you don't know
the difference between
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211. a pancreas and a pancake!
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212. Yeah? Well, you couldn't treat a
paper cut in a band-aid factory.
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213. Yeah? Well... Uh-oh.
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214. Looks like all that time
they spent talking smack
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215. cost them another patient.
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216. What's this? Who could it be?
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217. Oh, my goodness.
It's the blunder taker.
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218. I'm here to take out the trash.
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219. That's all the time we have
for tonight on the WWER.
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220. Good night, and... Oh!
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221. Moondrop.
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