Love, Victor 2x5

1. - Must be nice.

2. Not having to wake up at 5 a. m.

3. to practice with those homophobic morons.

4. - They're not all morons.

5. - Yo, what's up, my bromos?

6. Listen, I'm so glad we got to hang out last weekend.

7. Loved the cabin, by the way, Benji.

8. Such a warm color palette.

9. Oh, and that fireplace nook was positively dreamy.

10. I watched Queer Eye, so I know what's good.

11. - Andrew, why are you being so weird?

12. - I'm just trying to show you that I am a queer ally.

13. Or is a straight ally?

14. Look, point is, I'm an ally.

15. All right, what happened with the team was messed up.

16. Yes, but whenever you're ready,

17. we want you back.

18. - Okay. Uh, what about the guys that didn't want me to shower with them?

19. - Oh. Um, that— see—

20. - You want me back on the team for the first game of the season

21. because you know you're screwed without me.

22. Good luck.

23. - Yeah.

24. - Hey, did you ever think that maybe this is for the best?

25. I mean, you started basketball because your dad loves it, right?

26. - Yeah. Maybe you're right.

27. Maybe I just played basketball because it seemed like something

28. a straight kid would like to do. - Exactly.

29. Screw basketball. - Yeah, screw basketball!

30. - Yeah, screw basketball!

31. Sorry. I just wanted to fit in.

32. - Well, hi. - Hi.

33. Uh, are we still going to Benji's friends and family concert after school?

34. - Yes. Been working with the new band on some music,

35. and we need brutally honest feedback.

36. - Ah. So tell you you're great, even if you suck.

37. - Pretty much.

38. - Is it just me, or is the Hundred Years' War

39. just, like, really, really sensual?

40. - I know you're trying to distract me,

41. and I am immune to your feminine wiles.

42. - Even if I ask you to ravage me,

43. like the Black Death ravaged Europe in 1348?

44. - Dammit. You know I can't resist historically accurate dirty talk.

45. Knock, knock!

46. - Mom! I really wish you'd actually knock,

47. instead of saying "knock, knock" once you're in my room.

48. - Listen, I just got some incredible news.

49. Mary Lou Gordon's gallbladder just straight-up exploded,

50. so guess who's taking over hosting duties

51. for Good Morning Atlanta this week?

52. - Oh, my God. - Is she okay?

53. - Me! This is beyond exciting,

54. but if I want to get my eight hours of beauty rest,

55. I have to go to bed like, now.

56. - Okay. Good night. Oh, no. No, no, no.

57. I've seen every episode of Teen Mom

58. and that is not going down on my watch. Now, Felix,

59. honey, you know I am just very fond of you.

60. But get out of my house so I can lull myself into a low key coma

61. with the edibles my assistant gave me, okay?

62. - Ugh. She is the actual worst.

63. - Actually, you, um, wanna come to my place for a bit?

64. - Really? Is your mom not home?

65. - Oh, no. No. Sh-she's there. Um...

66. You know, I didn't want to tell you,

67. because I didn't want to jinx it, but she is on these new meds,

68. and she is doing a lot better,

69. and I kinda would love for you two to finally meet.

70. - Yes, Felix. That is amazing.

71. Um, let me just throw a respectable parent look together.

72. I want your mom to go crazy for me.

73. Sorry. Poor choice of words.

74. Uh, less talking and more leaving!

75. Isa, it's me.

76. - Hey, Mando! - Hey.

77. I, uh, have the rent check.

78. - Oh. Thank you.

79. - Of course.

80. - I can't stop thinking about what happened with us the other day.

81. - Me, neither.

82. Wow. Big fan of your work.

83. - And I of yours.

84. - Yeah.

85. But sex was never really our problem, was it?

86. - No. Mmm. - Yeah.

87. - But I think we should talk about what it means, uh, for us.

88. - Hmm. - You wanna have dinner tonight?

89. - Uh, I have PFLAG.

90. You can come with me.

91. Yeah, there's... there's a great barbecue place next door.

92. They have fried pickles, just like back in Texas.

93. Hmm?

94. Okay. You're still not ready to go to a meeting with me.

95. - I am working on it. I swear.

96. Dinner tomorrow night.

97. - Tomorrow's perfect. - Good.

98. - Okay. - Okay.

99. Okay, so I'll see you.

100. I don't— - I—

101. I don't— Let's do cheek. - Okay.

102. Great.

103. - Bye. - Bye.

104. - Okay, everyone here is, like, intimidatingly cool.

105. - Yay! I'm so glad you guys are here.

106. Cabin crew.

107. - Hey. - Hey, guys.

108. - So, Benji played me some of their tracks,

109. and they sound so amazing.

110. Like if Satin Jackets and Bleachers had a baby,

111. but then they died in a car crash,

112. so the baby had to be raised by Empire of the Sun.

113. Does that make any sense?

114. - No. But I love your passion.

115. Come on, Salazar.

116. Let's get the ladies some drinks.

117. - What— Uh, okay. Yeah.

118. Andrew, what do you want?

119. - Well, I want your ass back on the team.

120. Be honest. Don't you miss it?

121. - Being around a bunch of guys

122. that think I'm some sort of locker room perv?

123. No, I'm good. - No. Nobody thinks that.

124. A couple of guys are just weirded out, but they'll get over it.

125. I mean, you're basically the least gay gay person alive.

126. - Good to know. I'm gonna go and say hi to Benji.

127. - I—

128. - Guitar—

129. Hey. - Victor! Hey.

130. Uh, meet the band. This is Mylo, Stevie,

131. that's Coryn, and that is Tosh.

132. - Hi. It's so nice to finally meet you guys.

133. - Yeah, us, too. Benji will never shut up about you.

134. It's cute and annoying at the same time.

135. Is that Lucy's boyfriend?

136. Yeah, such a basic high school sports person.

137. Coryn! Victor plays basketball.

138. - Oh.

139. - I actually just quit,

140. so I'm not a "basic high school sports person" anymore.

141. - Yeah, Victor's in the early stages of jock recovery.

142. He just escaped the cult of cheap body spray and casual misogyny.

143. That's probably why you like him.

144. The sports. The church boy haircut.

145. He's your perfect straight boy fantasy.

146. - Oh, trust me.

147. Victor is much more than just a handsome jock.

148. He's a handsome ex-jock.

149. - Yeah. Thank God.

150. Now I don't have to sit with the basketball girlfriends

151. and do the whole "Go Grizzlies" dance.

152. Kill me dead.

153. - Oh, wow.

154. Felix, it looks so much better in here.

155. - Mmm-hmm. First time in years my mom's actually thrown stuff away.

156. I do kind of miss the leaning tower of pizza boxes, though.

157. Felix? Is that you? - Uh-huh.

158. I just made schnitzel!

159. - Mmm. - I— Oh!

160. Oh, I didn't know we had company.

161. I... I'm so sorry about the clutter.

162. You caught us in the middle of our spring cleaning.

163. - That's our story and we're sticking to it.

164. Mom, this is Lake.

165. - Oh, gosh. You're Lake!

166. You're the Lake!

167. Hi. It's so nice to meet you. - Oh, God!

168. Oh! Oh, and you're so gorgeous!

169. Oh! - Okay, Mom, uh, don't break my girlfriend.

170. - Okay. Okay. I know. I'm sorry.

171. I'm sorry. I just, I know how much you mean to my son.

172. Would you like to stay?

173. Because I just made some schnitzel.

174. - Homemade German? I am so in.

175. Oh, great. That's great.

176. Honey, will you come to the kitchen and help me,

177. so I can gush about your girlfriend in private?

178. - That went great. Right?

179. Yeah, I mean, I, I, I, I thought it would, but I wasn't really sure,

180. but that actually went really good. I— - Yes, it, it did. It did.

181. It went great. Your mom is awesome.

182. - Okay.

183. - Thank you, guys. We're gonna take five, and we'll be right back.

184. Whoo! Yeah!

185. - So, what did you guys think?

186. - Oh, I loved that last one.

187. - It was really, really good.

188. - Victor?

189. - Uh, it-it was cool.

190. - Uh, can I talk to you for a second?

191. - Yeah. Yeah.

192. - Okay. What's up with you?

193. - Nothing. It's just...

194. a little weird to hear you and your friends talk about me

195. like I'm some sort of dumb jock.

196. - They were just joking around.

197. - I'm sorry. I'm just...

198. messed up right now. And it's not your fault.

199. It's just...

200. I'm, I'm gonna head home.

201. - Okay.

202. - You guys really do sound great, though.

203. Uh, hey, I have a lot of homework,

204. so I'm gonna get going. But, uh, I'll see you tomorrow?

205. - Yeah. Sure. - Okay. All right. Bye, guys.

206. - Yep. Bye.

207. - Actually, I think I'm gonna head out, too.

208. I gotta get up at the ass crack of dawn for practice tomorrow.

209. You mind hanging with Mia?

210. Yeah, of course. - Oh, okay.

211. - Cool. Well, thank you.

212. - Hey, Shelby. Oh.

213. You have a little extra pep in your step today.

214. - Just feeling good about where I'm at in my life. You know?

215. Armando and I were intimate.

216. We're just separated. We're still married, so it's not a sin.

217. Although I guess he would be the judge of that.

218. We're having dinner

219. to talk about getting back together.

220. We have our problems, but, I, I,

221. I really want things to work out.

222. - What kind of problems?

223. He... He doesn't really know how to talk about his emotions.

224. - Yeah, it's like since I started coming here,

225. I feel way more in touch with my feelings.

226. You know? And— thanks.

227. And it just feels so good to not have everything bottled up inside.

228. I feel like I'm growing as a person,

229. which feels dumb to say, since I'm in my forties.

230. - Oh, no. It's not dumb.

231. Having a kid come out, it changes you.

232. I mean, last month, I went to drag queen bingo.

233. - How was that? - It's... fun.

234. I barely recognize the woman I used to be.

235. All because my kid was brave enough to say "I'm gay."

236. He is? When did he share this with you?

237. - A couple months back.

238. Armando has been surprisingly accepting of all of this,

239. considering his machismo.

240. But I am struggling.

241. And I, I know...

242. I know that Victor didn't choose to be this way...

243. - You're a good mother.

244. That's very clear.

245. But I think you're, you're right

246. to express your disapproval,

247. if you want Victor to know God's love.

248. - Oh.

249. - You sound disappointed.

250. - That's what I was always taught.

251. I just thought maybe the church was a little more flexible nowadays.

252. - Do you think God is in the business of providing loopholes?

253. I just thank God for giving me the courage

254. to come here, and...

255. to love my son for who he is.

256. - Oh...

257. Meeting's starting. - Right.

258. - Oof.

259. - I thought you were done with basketball.

260. - Andrew, what are you doing? You following me now?

261. - Come on. Let's go.

262. All right.

263. You live for this.

264. - Listen.

265. How many times do I have to tell you

266. I'm not gonna be part of a team that doesn't want me?

267. - And how many times do I have to tell you they will come around?

268. - Right.

269. Because I am "the least gay gay person alive."

270. - I'm guessing that was a stupid thing to say. - No.

271. No, it was perfect.

272. Please, tell me what's the exact level of gay I should be.

273. What is a perfect level of gay that will keep everyone happy?

274. Because apparently, I'm too gay for the locker room,

275. but I'm not gay enough for Benji and his friends.

276. So, where do I belong?

277. - You belong on a basketball court.

278. - Let's say I do come back.

279. What happens if one day I do want to be more "gay gay?"

280. And I change the way I dress,

281. or, or I dye my hair pink. Then what?

282. - Are those things that you really want?

283. - I think the pink hair thing could be kind of dope.

284. - Well, then, I think you should do it.

285. If anyone has a problem with it, they can answer to me.

286. - Andrew,

287. do you really think that you're an ally because you watch Queer Eye?

288. This whole time, you haven't said shit to the guys

289. that don't want me changing in the locker room with them.

290. Because at the end of the day,

291. you don't want to risk your reputation for the gay kid.

292. - Benji and Victor are such a hot couple.

293. Not that you and Victor weren't a hot couple.

294. You guys were a really hot couple.

295. But I should just stop talking. - It's okay.

296. I just want Victor to be happy.

297. I want all my friends to be happy.

298. You, uh, seem to make Andrew very happy.

299. - Oh, thanks.

300. To be honest, I'm surprised we've lasted this long.

301. - Really? Why?

302. - We're just so opposite.

303. Earlier this summer when we hooked up,

304. I just thought it was gonna be, like, a hot fling.

305. And then suddenly I'm his girlfriend...

306. Can I ask you something?

307. - Sure. Yeah. What's up?

308. - When we were at the cabin,

309. I saw you and Andrew outside together.

310. And it just seemed like... I don't know.

311. There was something about the way you were looking at each other...

312. Is there something going on?

313. - We hooked up once.

314. A long time ago. But there's nothing between us now.

315. I swear.

316. - Hmm.

317. - Is that, "Hmm, that's so random."

318. Or, "Hmm, hold my earrings. I'm about to clock a bitch."

319. - No, it's fine. Um, I'm just surprised.

320. Andrew never mentioned it.

321. - I'm, I'm sure he just didn't want to make you feel weird.

322. - I don't. I mean, feel weird.

323. I should feel a little weird, though, shouldn't I?

324. I mean, if I really cared about this relationship,

325. shouldn't I, like, feel something?

326. - I shouldn't have said anything.

327. - No. No, I'm really glad that you did.

328. This is... really helpful.

329. - That was divine.

330. The perfect meal on the perfect plates.

331. Tres chic. Where did you get them?

332. - Oh, thank you. They're family heirlooms.

333. Mmm. - So, who wants dessert?

334. - Oh, uh, thank you, but I should probably get going.

335. We have a test on the Hundred Years' War tomorrow

336. and pretty much all I know is how long it is.

337. - It's actually a hundred and sixteen years.

338. - Are you freaking kidding me?

339. - Oh.

340. - I'm sure Lake will be back soon, Mom.

341. - I'm gonna start cleaning up.

342. - Well, hey, she's like me, you know? Always...

343. down to keep partying.

344. - I want you to have these.

345. And if you give me a couple minutes,

346. I can wash the ones that we used tonight,

347. and then you can take those home, too.

348. What are you talking about, Mom? - It's j—

349. - Those are our plates. - Well, I, I know, but she likes 'em,

350. and I want her to have them. Felix, help me find a box.

351. - She's not taking our plates, Mom.

352. - Felix, I told you,

353. she likes 'em, and I want her to have 'em.

354. - Did you take your medication this morning?

355. - Why are you asking me that? Are you trying to embarrass me?

356. - No! I mean, um, I'm, I'm sure he's not.

357. Uh... You know, this is just so generous,

358. and, you know, we have our own family heirloom plates.

359. I, I wouldn't want there to be any heirloom envy—

360. - You know what? Fine!

361. - I ju— I... Oh, God.

362. Um... it was...

363. It was really nice to meet you, Lake.

364. Really.

365. - Felix. Felix, are you okay? - Yeah.

366. Yeah, no. Um... - Here.

367. - You know, this just— it happens sometimes.

368. When, uh, she takes new medication,

369. she comes out of her depression, and then she stops taking it,

370. and then she has a manic episode.

371. You know, I don't even know why I thought this time

372. would be different. Um...

373. I— - I think we need to get you some help.

374. - The new medication was working.

375. She just needs to take it. I'll get her back on them.

376. - Okay. Well, this is serious,

377. and, and I just really think

378. it's too much for you to handle. - N-no.

379. No.

380. I have been handling this alone...

381. for years.

382. I need you to promise me you won't tell anyone what happened.

383. - I promise.

384. - Okay.

385. - Uh, hello?

386. Uh, what's going on?

387. - Well, I had a long talk with the guys about you rejoining the team.

388. And, and this is our way of saying that

389. you can be as gay as you want, in whatever way that you want,

390. and we will forever stan you.

391. TEDDY And if you're gay, then... so am I.

392. So are all of us.

393. We're gay AF.

394. - No. Not what we talked about, Teddy.

395. - So, where's— where's Wyatt?

396. - The team wasn't a good fit for him anymore.

397. - Wow.

398. - And I'm sorry, man.

399. You can watch me shower any day.

400. I don't mind. - Oh...

401. No, no, I-I really don't want to watch you shower.

402. - Okay. Well, you don't have to decide right now. So...

403. - All right. Well— Victor, come on.

404. Welcome back. - Whew!

405. - All right.

406. Let's hope this looks better on you than it does on me.

407. - It definitely will.

408. - You guys, this stuff better wash out.

409. I got a court date on Monday!

410. Oh, I wasn't supposed to say that.

411. - Hey!

412. That's a tie.

413. Grizzlies up by nine.

414. That pink hair seems to be doing the trick.

415. - Wow. I like your hair.

416. - Ah, thanks.

417. I didn't think you were gonna come.

418. I-I know this isn't really your scene, but um— - Victor, um,

419. I'm really sorry about all those stupid jokes.

420. If basketball makes you happy, well...

421. That makes me a basketball boyfriend.

422. Girls?

423. What are you doing?

424. - The "Go Grizzlies" dance.

425. Duh!

426. - That's actually...

427. way harder than it looks.

428. I guess that's, uh, my punishment for making fun of athletes.

429. Lakey. Hi! Did you watch?

430. I crushed it on Good Morning Atlanta.

431. I interviewed Sarah Jessica Parker over Skype,

432. and she said I had pretty eyes.

433. Hey, what's wrong? - Nothing.

434. Congratulations on the show.

435. - Lake, you know that you can talk to me about anything, right?

436. - It's good to have you back, Salazar.

437. You really are the second best player on the team.

438. - Okay, Andrew.

439. - Hey, babe.

440. What's wrong?

441. - Hey, uh, we need to talk.

442. I am so sorry I'm late.

443. I changed four times before coming here.

444. What do you wear to a sort of date with your husband

445. who you're sort of separated from,

446. but definitely had full-on sex with?

447. Well, uh...

448. I always liked you in green. - Oh. Well, thank you.

449. I'm happy we're doing this.

450. I miss you.

451. - I miss you, too.

452. Okay, Mando, I'm just gonna jump right in.

453. - Okay.

454. - The affair with Roger...

455. It broke something, and that is my fault.

456. And I am so sorry that I,

457. I pressured you so hard to get over it.

458. - No. But our problems started before that.

459. Yeah, I-I think the real reason we separated was because

460. we were stuck in a pattern,

461. and the only way to get un-stuck is if we both change.

462. That's why I keep asking you to come to PFLAG with me.

463. And every time you say no,

464. it just feels like you don't want to change. - I do want to.

465. I went to see Father Lawrence yesterday,

466. to talk about everything.

467. - How'd it go?

468. - He said if... Victor chooses this path,

469. that he will never know God's love.

470. And I'm thinking, how can that be?

471. He is such a good son. He is such a good person...

472. Why is this happening to him?

473. - Is-Isa, it's not happening to him, okay?

474. It's just who he is.

475. You know, this whole thing with Victor, it's...

476. It's made me really look at myself,

477. and really try and change.

478. But if you're not going to change with me,

479. I don't know what the future holds.

480. - Andrew. What are you doing here?

481. - Lucy broke up with me.

482. She spent one night talking to you,

483. and she broke up with me. - Oh, my God.

484. I'm so sorry.

485. - Lucy, she asked me if anything had ever happened between us,

486. and I felt like I had to be honest.

487. But I really never meant to— - Mia...

488. - Yes?

489. - It's okay.

490. - It is? - Yeah.

491. - Why is your hair pink?

492. - I was trying to make things right with Victor.

493. Which is actually your fault, too.

494. - Why is that my fault?

495. - For as long as I can remember,

496. anytime I wanted to take the easy way out,

497. there was always this annoying voice in the back of my head,

498. pushing me to do better. To be better.

499. You know whose voice that is?

500. Even when you're not around me, I always hear you.

501. So, when Lucy ended it,

502. I figured, hey.

503. I've taken a million shots with you,

504. but I am about to take a million and one.

505. Mia. Mia, will, will you—