Love Is Blind 7x7

1. Monica Davis, will you marry me?

2. Yes, absolutely.

3. - Mm! - Mm!

4. Ashley, will you marry me?

5. I would be honored to marry you, Tyler.

6. Will you marry me?

7. Absolutely.

8. - Hi! Hey. - Hello.

9. - How are you? - Good!

10. - Will you marry me? - Yes, yes, yes!

11. Okay, it's for real.

12. - You're gorgeous. You know that? - Thank you.

13. Aah!

14. You're one of my favorite people.

15. Like, I'm willing and ready to, like, change my life for you.

16. I feel so good about us.

17. I do too.

18. - I've never felt this before. - Me either.

19. I've been looking for him for a really long time.

20. This is it. Like, no question.

21. Yes.

22. - That's how you feel? - I won't know until you meet my dad.

23. - Oh, for real? - He's gotta give the…

24. Bring it on.

25. You feel like I'm bossy? 'Cause I feel like I am.

26. You can try to be, but I'm an immovable object.

27. I can't have nobody who's on some shit.

28. - On some immature shit. - Yeah, like, come on. I'm a grown man.

29. I was so excited meeting everyone else, because all it does is sort of—

30. Baby.

31. I love you to death. I'm obsessed with you.

32. - Am I being chatty again? - Literally cannot get a word in.

33. We're gonna race.

34. Nick!

35. Oh, she's jealous. Don't be jealous.

36. Pissed me off.

37. The girl was like, "Looks like your girl's a jealous little bitch."

38. And Nick just laughed.

39. Hannah wrote down a fucking note of, like, ten things.

40. "Mature, question mark?"

41. I have concerns for, like, our relationship

42. and, like, what we need to address

43. to make sure that, like, we're 100% when we go to the altar.

44. Like, I just wanna make sure we're there.

45. I'm not the only one delusional.

46. I started to feel very, very disrespected.

47. When you actually left, I thought you weren't coming back.

48. I love you, but at a certain point, I have to have some respect for myself.

49. I'm sorry.

50. I do love you.

51. We can fix this.

52. Good morning from Cabo.

53. Good morning.

54. Stephen's taking me to a Mexican restaurant.

55. I get to drive. I get to drive on these wild roads.

56. - Wish me luck! - You'll be fine.

57. The things we do for love!

58. Vacation's amazing.

59. I never wanna leave.

60. - Mm! I never wanna leave her side.

61. You better not. I'll fight you.

62. She's already looking good. She just woke up like this.

63. Yeah, it doesn't make sense.

64. I've been loving it here.

65. I wish I could wake up to this every day.

66. - We could just move here. - We could.

67. Got some good rest this morning. Had a nice breakfast out here.

68. Is there anything we need to work on?

69. Sometimes I can be a little selfish

70. or some things I say I should probably think twice before I say it.

71. - Yeah. - What about you?

72. I think I'm realizing I need to work on being less bitchy sometimes.

73. A little bitchy is good, but, um…

74. But I can work on being kinder to you sometimes.

75. Sometimes you just frustrate me.

76. - I never get angry or mean or yell. - Yeah.

77. I'm just like, "Ugh, Nick, come on."

78. But I need to be more patient with you, I think.

79. "Come on, Nick, what the fuck?"

80. I don't think I do that.

81. Do I shave the neck or not? What do you think?

82. Do you think it'll look cleaner?

83. Oh, it will be definitely look cleaner, but what's the look?

84. - So it depends. Without the hoodie. - You could shave it.

85. - What's your preference? - Shave it.

86. - Cool. There it is. - There it goes. Done deal.

87. She's already telling me what to do. And I'm gonna oblige it!

88. - I think he likes it a little. - This is great.

89. All right. You're getting carried away.

90. Oh, my God!

91. I was in the Navy for seven years.

92. And I was stationed on destroyers and managed divisions of sailors.

93. - Hi! - Hello.

94. - Welcome aboard. - Hello.

95. - Are you enjoying your trip? - Thank you.

96. I can navigate a ship, like, specifically a USS naval destroyer.

97. I could probably drive this yacht.

98. I miss being out to sea. This is so exciting.

99. - I close my eyes, I'm on a Navy boat. - Yeah?

100. I realized you were in the Navy,

101. but I didn't realize how much, like, you loved boats, which makes sense.

102. I did it for seven years, yeah.

103. There was a lot of sweet moments in the Navy, like being out to sea,

104. and, like, being with your crew and your service members,

105. but I was away from home a lot.

106. I missed a lot of holidays. It's hard to keep a relationship.

107. It's been a few years, but it was a huge part of my life.

108. And all my friends, mainly, are from military.

109. Yeah.

110. - You look so good. - Thank you. You look amazing.

111. I feel like this makes for a great photo right here.

112. Yes! Let's take a video first.

113. Let's take a video first.

114. Don't slide off, yo.

115. Um, I'm a mariner.

116. - I'm a sailor. - Oh, yeah, I'm sorry.

117. I have my sea legs.

118. - Look so good, baby. - Yeah?

119. - Yes. - Maybe a little back?

120. - Yes! Work. - Okay.

121. - Work. - Wait, gotta do a little ring.

122. Pose, a little zoom in on the ring.

123. This morning I woke up, and I thought I was going home.

124. What happened last night between Alex and I,

125. that shit wasn't cool.

126. I'm trying to be positive,

127. but I'm just taking in what he said.

128. Um, I knew he was upset,

129. but I didn't know the extent of how upset he was until he spoke on it, so…

130. Yeah.

131. Because I see

132. that she kind of can understand where I'm coming from

133. and is willing to listen,

134. I am more than willing to, like, keep exploring this.

135. Knowing that he came in today,

136. that he had every intention of this being the last conversation

137. and now he wants to have another conversation

138. gives me, like, the optimism that it's going in the right direction.

139. We're supposed to be going ATV riding. I have no idea what that looks like,

140. um, especially since Tim

141. originally had no intention of doing that with me.

142. She is my fiancée and hopefully will be my wife.

143. I do genuinely love Tim, and I do want to bring him home

144. and introduce him to my family and get married to him,

145. but this whole situation

146. definitely put a hold on it, I guess,

147. until we figure out what happens now,

148. what happens next.

149. - Big camel. - Are you doing this, Tyler?

150. - What? Making it move?

151. - No, I don't know how to talk to a camel! That's crazy.

152. Ooh. Ooh. He move a lot.

153. Can you see yourself getting married in three weeks?

154. Yes, I can see myself getting married tomorrow, to be honest, to you.

155. - Really? - Honest to God.

156. - There's more things to learn. - Yeah.

157. But I don't think I'll ever find a guy like you ever again, honestly.

158. - Thank you so much. - Thank you.

159. Amazing.

160. - Family, holidays, what's that look like? - Yes.

161. - As far as? - Us.

162. Once we have kids and stuff,

163. you have to split it up, I guess.

164. Last year, I stayed home for Christmas. I cooked a big meal for myself.

165. I literally made baked mac and cheese,

166. collard greens, fried chicken.

167. That's so funny. How about I did the same thing.

168. Damn.

169. - I made crab cakes, Gouda mac. - Oh, yeah.

170. - You know what I wanna do though? - What?

171. Come up with our own traditions. Mine was, like, s'mores with my mom

172. for holidays that we could, like, keep on every year.

173. - Christmas… - On Christmas Eve, we do this.

174. We should create our own, like, ornament, tree ornament.

175. - Just a thought. Yeah, just something. - That's cute.

176. But when we have, like, a— maybe it would be cool when we have kids.

177. Um… every year,

178. we do a deep dive of, like, old Christmas movies.

179. - I love Christmas movies. - Talking my language.

180. I made my own ugly Christmas sweater.

181. - We can host ugly sweater parties. - We can.

182. I'm a big costume person. I'm a big theme person.

183. I already talked to the guys. We are doing a Halloween dress-up.

184. Honestly, you're the kind of person I could hang with anywhere.

185. That's what I'm saying. I don't care what we do.

186. - We're about to get married. - I love that.

187. You ready? Let's ride.

188. Whew!

189. Nick, was it fun?

190. Oh, my gosh.

191. - I wouldn't do it again. - One more?

192. No, I'm not ready to die yet.

193. Nick, don't tell me that!

194. Oh, my God!

195. I hope I can have kids after this.

196. We did it, girl. Well, I did it.

197. Don't speak too soon for me, but I'm very, very, very proud of you.

198. - Take a seat, please. - Yeah.

199. - Okay, I'll do the door. - You got it, girl.

200. Aah!

201. Step on here.

202. Ready?

203. Three, two, one.

204. Bungee!

205. - Hmm. - Damn.

206. There you go.

207. Attagirl.

208. Perfect. Come back here.

209. I see you.

210. That was amazing.

211. - Come this way. - Okay.

212. Help me. Spin around.

213. Whoo!

214. Good job. I'm proud of you.

215. - I'm still a little weak in the knees. - I know.

216. Bungee jumping gives me the same feeling as when we're in love, baby.

217. Uh-huh. Oh, my gosh, right? Exhilarating.

218. Ride or die.

219. Whoa!

220. Oh, shit.

221. Wow.

222. - This is cool. - Hello.

223. - Welcome to the glassblowing factory. - Hi.

224. He's gonna make a custom figure for you.

225. Aww, look! Wow, what's so cool.

226. It's beautiful. Beautiful. That is very cool.

227. Very fitting for a man that's very about fish.

228. So this is gonna go in your place.

229. "Our place."

230. I feel like there's something that's been kind of weighing on me and bothering me.

231. I just wanna address it.

232. In the pods, I remember you specifically telling me, like,

233. "We're together. Like, I'm gonna get you flowers."

234. I've waited a long time to, like, find the right person.

235. The actions matching up with the words, right?

236. Like, that's gonna be really important to me.

237. You're right, and…

238. It…

239. I was using that as a concept,

240. but, like, it wouldn't be flowers.

241. But it would be something along those lines of a gift.

242. Like, flowers to me… I get it.

243. It's not about flowers. It's just about making me feel special.

244. - Yeah, you're right. - You know the love languages.

245. I'm a big words of affirmation, acts of service person.

246. But my third one is gifts. And, like, I show love.

247. For Christmas, like, I will get everyone that I know the most thoughtful gift.

248. I spend money on, like, making people smile.

249. Gifts have always been my last.

250. - Even for Christmas. - Mm-hmm.

251. I think the last time

252. my family was able to, like, really provide gifts for everyone…

253. Yeah.

254. Years ago. I haven't really gotten a Christmas gift in, like, a long time.

255. When it comes to our financial upbringing,

256. I refuse to let that be the thing that ever, like, puts space between us.

257. I have not once felt like our financial upbringing differences…

258. Like, I know I don't have to get you

259. something top quality, like a Kate Spade bag.

260. Don't ever get me one of those.

261. - Like a YSL bag. - I don't even know what that is.

262. Louis Vuitton? You've heard of Louis Vuitton.

263. Is he, like, a big deal?

264. - He's a big deal. Yeah. - Okay.

265. I love you.

266. I don't wanna sound materialistic, but I also want, like, to feel special.

267. - Yeah. - Yeah.

268. No, you're right. You're right.

269. And I dropped the ball on that.

270. And I'm not happy about that.

271. I do recognize that, like, you wrote me a poem

272. after days of meeting me, and you sang me Edwin McCain,

273. and, like, those things melt my heart deeply.

274. But I also am who I am. Like, I also want flowers sometimes.

275. I really don't wanna disappoint you.

276. It's just, it's a lot.

277. - What's a lot? - Moving forward with marriage.

278. It's just, like, such a massive decision.

279. And I just don't want to

280. feel forced into doing something,

281. 'cause I don't think that's fair to you.

282. If suddenly I'm having second thoughts, next thing you know—

283. Are you? Like, I'm so confused that you're saying this.

284. - I know. No, I'm not. - Literally, I'm so confused.

285. I'm not. I'm not.

286. - I'm just— - No, you are.

287. - It's okay. Just say it. - No, I'm not having second thoughts.

288. You're saying things like, "Second…" Like, what the fuck?

289. - I— - And you're not looking me in the eyes.

290. Yeah, I know, 'cause I'm trying to think. I'm trying to think.

291. You're right. Let me think of how best to word it.

292. Um, I'm by no means afraid to marry you.

293. Like, I am genuinely in love with you.

294. I'm just nervous about the whole thing

295. because it's a huge, huge commitment.

296. It's not that I'm second-guessing being with you.

297. You know, I just don't wanna feel overwhelmed

298. when the moment comes

299. to meet you at the altar.

300. You're fucking kidding me. You, day one, were like,

301. "I'm in love with you. I'm gonna marry you."

302. - And you knew what this was. - Yeah.

303. Like, we knew what we were getting ourselves into.

304. These are things that I was very much

305. hoping you had thought through.

306. - Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. - Right? Before being so sure.

307. - You okay? - Yeah. I'm listening. I'm listening.

308. I thought you were about to cry. Are you okay?

309. I'm listening. I just— I appreciate you.

310. Yeah, I appreciate you too.

311. It's a lot, but, like, let's take it…

312. - You're right. - One step.

313. Like, all that matters is you and I. That's all that matters.

314. - Right? - Yeah, yeah.

315. I love you.

316. Love you.

317. Oh, Lord!

318. Oh, hell no.

319. Oh, my God!

320. Stay cool. I don't fuck with heights!

321. I like my feet on the ground.

322. You got this, babe.

323. - I'm thankful to be alive. - I know.

324. - Ugh! - That was so scary.

325. Okay, now I trust you with my life 'cause you got us over that bridge.

326. Oh, the beach!

327. So pretty!

328. Look at this.

329. - You good? All right. - Yeah.

330. Look at this view though.

331. - You can see all the way down the beach. - I know.

332. - That was really scary. Yeah, no. The bridge was not what's up.

333. I feel like the bridge was kind of like a trust exercise.

334. It can be a bridge to a new beginning.

335. - Or that. - Or that.

336. I still love you.

337. You know, it's…

338. We had what we had, but, like, let's…

339. leave that where it is and, like, start anew.

340. I'm glad you're on the same page.

341. Yippee.

342. So you're gonna come back to the hotel room?

343. - Hmm? Or are you gonna stay separate? - I will. I will.

344. - You will? - Yeah, I will.

345. Perfect.

346. First to take a nap.

347. Then a shower 'cause I'm dusty as hell.

348. I know.

349. But, yeah, I'll come back.

350. I think we'll be okay.

351. I do wanna keep moving forward.

352. Like you said, first thing we did was cross that big-ass bridge.

353. Yeah.

354. If we could get across there, we'll be all right, you know?

355. - Yeah. - Just don't look down.

356. - So are you excited to come back? - I am.

357. I am.

358. - Are you excited for me to come back? - Good. I am. I am.

359. Yeah. Feels so exciting.

360. - This view is beautiful. - I know.

361. - Are you getting down? - Yeah, but…

362. - I don't know how I'm gonna get down. - Just give me your hand.

363. Give me your hand and then jump.

364. - Whoa! - I got you. Damn.

365. I got you. I got you.

366. I got you. Oh, look at that bird.

367. It's like a pelican swooping down. It's gorgeous.

368. - Love you. - I love you too.

369. - Slick Nick! Nick and Hannah.

370. - Hello! - Ah! There we go.

371. - What's up, y'all? Good to see you. - Slick Nick! What's good?

372. Hi!

373. - Hi! - Damn.

374. Look, man. Tyler got the hat.

375. - Love the hat. - Like that? Got this to ride camels.

376. - You guys got to ride a fucking camel? - Yeah.

377. Stop! Dude, that's at the top of my bucket list.

378. Do you feel like you're teaching him a lot of things?

379. - Yeah. - Yeah.

380. A lot. I'm sure he'll teach me something too eventually, but, like…

381. 'Cause he had his suitcases and was leaving.

382. Yeah. Oh, the trip?

383. Yes! He was going to leave this entire experience.

384. Oh, my God.

385. I'm like, I don't have this man's number.

386. I don't know where this man lives.

387. If this man leaves, I am never going to speak to him again.

388. - So what happened today? - We smoothed it over.

389. We have to go see that. Let's go see it right now.

390. - Let's go! - We'll come back.

391. - We'll come back. We'll come back. - I wanna go see!

392. - Let's go. Let's go. Let's go. - Come on.

393. Stephen, look!

394. - I'm gonna come. - So…

395. - Wow! It's so pretty. - Are they doing this for us?

396. So pretty!

397. Monica, you look very beautiful in purple.

398. Thank you, baby.

399. - Holy crap! - That was a little low.

400. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - Whoa, so pretty!

401. Where's Garrett?

402. Yeah! Tim, I got you, dawg. Come on, dawg.

403. - Oh, man. Where's G-baby? - We ain't need nobody!

404. Where's G-baby? I got everything I need right here.

405. Right here, dawg.

406. Love you.

407. Love you too.

408. She finally told me to where it sunk in, where I was like, "Sure."

409. That was so romantic. That was so romantic out there.

410. Thank you so much for the romance.

411. - I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I was— - Oh, my God!

412. So romantic! Holding all the other people together.

413. I was talking with Garrett.

414. I'm sorry. I know. Oh, my God. Okay.

415. We were, like— it was a…

416. - What? - Excuse me.

417. - Come on. - What?

418. We don't see shit like this.

419. We don't see fireworks all the time, so yeah, we ran.

420. We were like, "Okay!"

421. - So I wanna say… - This is what I don't like about arguing.

422. 'Cause then everything he's doing is pissing me off.

423. - Can I come over here? - Yes! Oh, my God. Please.

424. But, like, I'm used to— I try not to be hard on myself.

425. Are you good?

426. Yeah.

427. We're good. I love you.

428. - Sorry. - We're good.

429. Um, I just gave him a hard time for not watching the fireworks with me.

430. - He's so scared of me. - "He's so scared of me."

431. - He's so scared of me. - As he should be.

432. I'm not fucking around with him anymore.

433. Thanks, baby.

434. Sparkling water?

435. I don't know if you like sparkling water. I'm not a big fan.

436. No, but it's okay. I'll drink it.

437. Also, I'm sorry.

438. Garrett was, like, having a moment.

439. - It's okay, babe. - I know.

440. I still wanted to acknowledge that, because I…

441. I'm sorry. I still wanted to acknowledge that.

442. You said to me earlier you were gonna make up for the flowers,

443. but it's okay.

444. Taylor and I cuddled each other outside by the fireworks.

445. Your man and I were having a very, like, serious moment about something,

446. and, like, then the fireworks happened, and I was like,

447. "Please finish your thought."

448. I felt like it would have been rude to say, "Hey, hold on."

449. Yeah, it's really hard when we have such limited time

450. and, like, things happen.

451. And knowing Garrett and the way that his brain works

452. is like I know this man needs to get it out.

453. Being a quantum physicist,

454. he uses different thinking patterns than I do to describe shit.

455. And I kind of suck sometimes at describing shit.

456. - I don't know if that's true. - Yeah.

457. I don't think you suck at describing things.

458. Thank you. This situation…

459. There's gonna be a time for all of us,

460. where, like, if you make it on the show,

461. regardless, like, you're going to eventually

462. have people confronting you.

463. People that know you, you know, that are complete strangers.

464. Like, "Oh, I know your entire backstory."

465. And for a lot of guys,

466. there are women that are homewreckers out there that are like,

467. "I don't give a fuck what your situation is."

468. - "I wanna suck your dick." - Sorry.

469. - No, you're fine. - What's happening?

470. - We were talking— - How did we get here?

471. You need to understand where you're deep-rooted at.

472. There is where I'm coming back. Don't worry.

473. I'll feed you, baby bird. I'll bring it home.

474. I'm like, "Are you gonna get your dick sucked by a woman?"

475. No, no, no, no, no.

476. But you will be tempted

477. in a situation that you've never been tempted before

478. because, you know, like, suddenly you have this spotlight on you,

479. and you need to understand where you're at.

480. - I'm gonna get a french fry. I'll be back. - Okay.

481. You need to understand why you're here with this specific person.

482. - Are you okay? - Yeah, I'm okay. I'm kind of annoyed.

483. I've been scared because of the process

484. of this has moved both so quickly

485. and so suddenly, that it's scary.

486. But not once have I questioned how I feel about this woman.

487. How are you feeling going back to real life as an engaged woman?

488. I'm excited, but I'm also scared to live with you.

489. - Why are you scared? I don't know how you're like.

490. - We've just been on vacation. - Yeah, that's true.

491. - Do you expect me to cook every day? - No.

492. - Because I'm not. - You could use DoorDash. Shit.

493. - 'Cause I'm not. - Shit. That's fine.

494. - I'm not cooking every day. - I don't like dishes.

495. I just don't do dirty stuff. I don't leave food out.

496. Yeah, no.

497. I don't think we're gonna have that problem.

498. - I think we're on the same page. - I can't wait to see your apartment.

499. I can't wait for you to see my house and then of course, my bedroom.

500. But that's a surprise you have to wait to see.

501. - Please be for real. - I'm serious.

502. You're gonna learn to believe in me one of these days.

503. This is the only real annoying part of the end of all this.

504. - Mm-hmm. - Is having to refold, repack everything.

505. - Mm-hmm. - Like…

506. - What is it, the shirt? - Do you…

507. Do you button all of your shirts before you fold the shirt to put it in—

508. Just to keep it together, yeah.

509. - Yeah, and then… - Fascinating.

510. - Yeah. - Can we do it in the morning?

511. And you can lay with me or lay with me until I fall asleep?

512. I know. You're right.

513. All right, maybe if I didn't make such a mess to begin with.

514. Right.

515. I was thinking the same thing.

516. Wouldn't be in this problem to begin with.

517. - Oh, hi. - Hi.

518. Love you.

519. I love you.

520. Mm.

521. It's like I've known you for years.

522. I've just really appreciated you making me feel, like, extra comfortable

523. and, like, going at the pace that, like, I needed to go at

524. for us to, like, deepen our relationship.

525. I just feel like it wouldn't have been, like, authentic

526. or genuine if I went

527. at any other kind of pace,

528. so thank you. I love you.

529. - I love you too. - Mm.

530. Yeah, it's been just right. I feel like it's been just right.

531. Mm-hmm. I feel like I said in the pods, like, everything's just gonna get harder.

532. Unless you've gone through this process, it's pretty shocking

533. to explain that to people who, like, love and care for us

534. and are probably gonna be also skeptical, kind of makes me nervous.

535. That's not to say, like, I'm gonna make my decision

536. based off of, like, what everyone else thinks.

537. Our best and honest shot at it is

538. all we can do, and I think we've both decided that's what we want to do.

539. Yeah.

540. If it's not, tell me now.

541. - No, obviously, it is. Yeah. - Separate flights, please. Thank you.

542. - You ready to go back home? - Actually, I am.

543. She still loves me, y'all. Just to be clear, right?

544. I definitely do. You can't get rid of me, Tyler.

545. About to head out to the airport.

546. - Are you packed? - I gotta get ready.

547. We'll see you in DC.

548. Peace.

549. We'll miss you!

550. Here we are! Bye, Mexico!

551. To the real world.

552. Oh, fuck! That was not good.

553. Wide load!

554. That's from all of Garrett's bikinis.

555. Welcome to our nation's capital, Washington, DC.

556. Oh, this is nice.

557. Our couples are about to enter the most intense phase of this experiment.

558. - Here we are. Whoa! - What are we working with?

559. I love it. Living together in the real world.

560. The shower is big enough for two people.

561. They've gotten their devices.

562. - I'd love to see your Instagram. - Oh, my God.

563. I'm sure it's all the reasons that we're glad that love is blind.

564. Yeah.

565. Will looks, race, age, family

566. or financial considerations come into play?

567. My dad and my stepmom, hmm.

568. They're gonna have a lot of questions.

569. How will they integrate their lives, their homes, careers?

570. Will they allow modern distractions

571. or the opinions of others to sabotage them?

572. - What was your best phone call today? - The fam.

573. - I was like, "I'm engaged to this weirdo." - "To this weirdo."

574. My mom was, "I've never seen you with a smile like that."

575. I was like, "Mom, shut up."

576. All right!

577. It started with love, a true emotional connection.

578. Now in just three weeks, our couples will be at the altar

579. and have to make the most important decision of their lives.

580. - Make sure Ashley doesn't get sick of me. - What's your plan for that?

581. Pray.

582. Will they prove that love truly is blind?

583. Are you excited to live together?

584. - Little different than Mexico. We've kind of been living together.

585. One thing that bothers me too is, like, cushions that get messed up. Oh!

586. I can't do it.

587. - What's that? - Cushions.

588. Oh, they don't stay up like that?

589. It bothers me so much for some reason.

590. Yeah, of course.

591. Luna's coming.

592. How do you wanna work that out? I mean, it's your dog, so…

593. But if you wanted, like, me to help you out,

594. do 50-50, every other day, I'm cool with that.

595. Oh, it's probably you every day, Nick.

596. Really? Even though you get up at five?

597. No, I'm used to it. But, yeah, help me out some.

598. Yeah, no, I got you. I got you.

599. - She's my princess baby. - Mm-hmm.

600. Luna Dorka.

601. Luna Dork.

602. I think you're someone who needs to be told to do things, or you won't do them.

603. Like, if the trash needs taking out, you're not gonna take it out.

604. Like, if I ask you, I think you'll do it, but I'm gonna have to ask.

605. If I put food in the trash and it's full, you don't think I'll take it out?

606. I don't think, but I don't know either. We haven't had to take the trash out yet.

607. Like, you say you're gonna take Luna out in the morning. I hope you do.

608. - Yeah. - I'm younger than you.

609. And I'm more mature than you.

610. - You think you're more mature than me? - Yeah.

611. You can't even keep a straight face.

612. - Look, this brings up— - I'm more emotionally intelligent.

613. - This brings up a— - And intelligent.

614. We're just gonna gloss over that.

615. This brings up a fantastic point. You think you're more mature than me.

616. How are you gonna bring someone more immature into your space,

617. your personal space, your oasis and be able to live with me?

618. That's my biggest concern.

619. - Can you mount a TV? - No.

620. Guess what. I can fill a Brita up with water.

621. This is what I'm saying, what worries me.

622. - I'mma do the dishes. - Because I can do everything.

623. Okay! So, obviously, I can too, other than mount a TV.

624. - Okay. - Do the laundry, make us food.

625. I'mma clean the dishes. Put 'em in the dishwasher.

626. - I'mma get groceries. - So fuck the patriarchy in our house.

627. Sounds good.

628. I'll take the dog out. You take the trash out.

629. What's the first meal you're gonna cook for me?

630. What's something that you love to cook? That's like, your specialty?

631. I could do, like, a fish dish.

632. - I could, like, do salmon pasta. - You can't sauté a steak?

633. I could do a steak in here. I could make a salad.

634. - You can make a salad? - A salmon salad or a chicken salad.

635. - Mm! - I'm just gonna put salad—

636. I could pick up salad and just put it in a bowl.

637. - Yes, chef! - Yeah, exactly. "Yes, chef."

638. - No. - Know what? I make a mean bowl of cereal.

639. You can keep that to yourself.

640. I'm so independent. It's my way or the highway.

641. - That's gonna take some adjusting. - Yeah.

642. Obviously, we have good communication, but I'm not gonna say anything mean.

643. Just give you some time and space?

644. - Yeah. - Gotcha.

645. Then a kiss after an hour.

646. - "Nick, why are you ignoring me?" - Three.

647. Three? Oh, shit.

648. I'll just leave and go do work.

649. - You'll text me, "I miss you." - No, I love you.

650. I'm just an independent person, need a lot of space type of gal.

651. - Yeah. - I'm excited to live with you though.

652. I just have one job to do, to make you happy.

653. Okay, I like that.

654. Mm. This is awesome.

655. - Holy shit, this is so nice. - This is so great.

656. - Dude, I mean, Cabo, what? - I wanna have friends over.

657. Oh, yeah.

658. - Gonna make it homey. - Oh, we're hosting a party.

659. We're gonna buy flowers.

660. Mm.

661. Yeah, this is cool.

662. I feel like I only ever see this in Instagram pictures.

663. - What? - Like, these kind of views.

664. Views, right? It's really sick.

665. And we got a breakfast nook.

666. Get the fuck out of here.

667. Groceries.

668. Wine, beer, flowers.

669. More beer.

670. More flowers.

671. More groceries.

672. And more…

673. flowers.

674. - Wine? - Flowers.

675. More flowers.

676. You said you like roses.

677. I love roses. Like, white roses. I love hydrangeas.

678. I love sunflowers.

679. - I love all flowers. - Hmm.

680. Okay.

681. This is nice.

682. Dude, this is crazy.

683. This is nuts!

684. Cheers to being roomies.

685. - Yeah! - For life!

686. - Lucky you. - Lucky us.

687. Lucky us.

688. Don't make a face.

689. So good— good.

690. It's actually good.

691. It is though, isn't it?

692. Mmm!

693. I love you.

694. I love you.

695. Are you still making a face from the tequila?

696. - Oh, it feels good. - Or was my kiss gross?

697. No, your kiss was not gross. It was a great kiss. It was a great kiss.

698. "Why'd you go on Love Is Blind? I don't know."

699. "My Instagram just should be attracting women."

700. That is the really interesting, great part of the experiment

701. is that we don't have the social media

702. and you don't have the committee of friends that look at your stuff.

703. - Soon as they saw, they'd be, "Taylor…" - And they like, give you the ick.

704. Okay, that is a bit far.

705. Coming from the person that hasn't been in a relationship for seven years.

706. That's by choice!

707. I'm a strong, independent man who has an Instagram full of fish.

708. All right.

709. - Get your phone. Let's do this. - Step into the hot seat, my love.

710. This is a big moment for our relationship. We gonna see each other's social media.

711. I don't like that this is being built up.

712. Yeah, it's not a big deal.

713. I'm not gonna totally get the ick and then leave.

714. - I promise. - You trying to convince me or yourself?

715. I'm not sure.

716. - But hold on. - I can't wait to see.

717. Let's just set some, like, context for a second here.

718. All I do is work. When I don't work, I go spearfishing.

719. So, naturally,

720. all I post about is spearfishing.

721. But it's mostly just fish.

722. Okay.

723. - But, like, very… - You don't have to…

724. Nice fish.

725. The best fish. Like, dangerous fish.

726. I risk my ass for these fish.

727. Like, life on the edge.

728. Like, almost die chasing these fish kind of stuff.

729. Okay, this is…

730. All right, here we go. Let's do this.

731. Oh, look.

732. Oh, shit! Let's look at that one.

733. But you make it black and white.

734. It says so much by saying so little.

735. Wow. Look how happy you are catching your fish.

736. Look at this thing, huh? That ain't no little bass.

737. Okay, we get it. The fish is as big as you.

738. - Just saying. Won't talk about it. - I'd swipe right with you.

739. - Thank you. Get out. - No, I wouldn't.

740. You know, you're the best catch of them all.

741. That should be our wedding hashtag.

742. "Best catch of them all."

743. No, no, we're not gonna get that freakin' corny.

744. That would be ridiculous.

745. Actually, write that down.

746. You think this bed is big enough for both of us?

747. Yeah, it's a queen size. Mine at home is a king, so, like…

748. That means you have to cuddle with me.

749. I can't wait.

750. Say you don't like to cuddle without saying you don't like to cuddle.

751. You know I sleep hot. I'm just saying.

752. I chose a man that doesn't like to cuddle.

753. You chose a man who sweats in his sleep.

754. I hate it here.

755. I have to force this man to be the big spoon.

756. - Hmm. Let me turn down the covers for you.

757. Thank you, kind sir.

758. Yeah, I like that.

759. I also love that we like the same temperature.

760. Yeah.

761. Because I can't sleep in the heat at all.

762. Okay.

763. Dear God, thank you for getting me and Ashley back home safely.

764. Please watch over us as we start a new journey living together.

765. Keep your hands on us, protect us, and when we need it, heal us.

766. Hmm.

767. Um, watch over our friends as well.

768. And also…

769. Getting a little worked up.

770. Also, just keep watching us.

771. Um, watch Ashley's family, please watch over my family.

772. And watch over us as we sleep.

773. - It's in your precious name I pray. Amen. - Amen. Oh!

774. I was gonna cry. I'm about to cry!

775. - No, you weren't. Why? - I was.

776. Just the good stuff.

777. - Yeah? Happy? - Yeah.

778. Yeah.

779. Love that.

780. Wedding is three weeks away.

781. Three weeks away! How do you feel about that when you hear it?

782. Um, honestly, the only nerves I have is, like, just talking to your mom.

783. - Yeah. - Probably.

784. I'm excited to do wedding planning with you

785. because I feel like it's not just gonna be me planning.

786. - Like, I don't need— - We'll see.

787. Well, that's true.

788. - You're gonna be a bridezilla. - You think so?

789. - You're gonna be a groomzilla. - Uh, probably.

790. - Yes, babe, you are. - Potentially.

791. - I do like specific things, yeah, so… - Yeah.

792. Which I'm excited about.

793. I never wanted to marry someone where it's like,

794. I plan the wedding. He just shows up.

795. - Yeah, no. - I think that's such bullshit.

796. It's indicative of like, maybe how they show up in the relationship.

797. - Yeah. - Mm-hmm.

798. I'm excited. I mean, the only other thing I'm nervous about is just

799. your little black, you know,

800. black wedding that you wanna have.

801. - I'm like— - My black theme?

802. Have you ever stopped to, like, envision what a black wedding would look like?

803. - Yeah. - Everyone walking in wearing black?

804. It'd be so cool. Then I'm in white, and my man's in a white tux.

805. That would look so dark.

806. Not really.

807. I'll be shining up the room in my beautiful white dress.

808. But, babe, why do you keep bringing in black?

809. What is the obsession with black, babe?

810. Black? Babe, we're Black!

811. Well, yeah, we're Black, but, like, I'm saying, like…

812. No, I love the color black. It's just a great color. It's slimming.

813. It's hot. Like, it's cool.

814. Black is not— babe, no. We're not doing black in the wedding.

815. You're so anti-black.

816. Don't try me.

817. Love you.

818. - Mwah! Love you. Turn off lights. - All right, turn off the lights.

819. Hide under the covers!

820. Good morning, everyone. On our way to F-Burg.

821. - Did I do it right? No, that's not a thing, so…

822. That's not what we say at all.

823. Garrett's bringing home a city girl to meet everyone.

824. Technically, you're from, like, a beach metropolis.

825. So I'm not gonna call that a city girl.

826. I'm pretty sure it's a city. It's like America's finest city.

827. - Okay, well… - I also live in DC.

828. We'll table that one for now. That's right. You're a DC girl.

829. - So Garrett's bringing home… - Little policy analyst.

830. - I'm not an analyst. - Policy consultant.

831. You analyze papers, and you consult based on that.

832. Okay, so the diary cam is over.

833. - I'll get the door. I got it. - You get that? All right.

834. Go right in.

835. - Hello-hello. - Hi.

836. - Hi. It's great to meet you.

837. - This is Taylor.. Have a hug.

838. - Hi. Good to meet you.

839. - Hi. Hey, how are you?

840. - Nice to meet you. Hi, nice to meet you.

841. - It's so great to meet you. How are you?

842. - Good. This is Makayla.

843. Hi! I've heard so much about you guys.

844. - Tryston, hi! We got you some flowers. - Thank you.

845. I'm gonna bring 'em in the kitchen, where we're gonna go.

846. Beautiful.

847. And this is for you.

848. Of course it is.

849. Nice. Thank you.

850. We got you this too.

851. Don't put it next to these, by the way.

852. - Wanted to have something for you. - So sweet.

853. Ours kind of looks a little weak now.

854. It's good. You gave me him so that's all that matters.

855. Aww!

856. He's a good egg.

857. Well, let's see the ring.

858. - Very pretty. - Garrett was my number one since day one.

859. Yeah, it was definitely a very,

860. like, vulnerable experience, for sure.

861. That's what really shocks me the most, I think, about is because

862. you have never been one to wear your heart on your sleeve or share.

863. - I was really surprised. - Wore him down. Good for you.

864. If I wanted her, I had to break out, so…

865. - It's getting hot in here. - Oh, my!

866. Typically, when we have our Sunday meals together as a family,

867. he's our bartender.

868. He is the master mixologist.

869. It's like chemistry.

870. Actually, her undergrad was in chemistry.

871. - Oh, okay! - So you're the new bar.

872. New bartender here.

873. She actually makes a skinny margarita,

874. but the secret ingredient is honey, 'cause I gave her the honey…

875. There you go. Well, we got lots of honey.

876. The only times I use my chemistry degree

877. is, like, making drinks and dating Garrett.

878. Life's changing fast.

879. Yeah, it's crazy.

880. I overheard that your parents absolutely do not want to participate,

881. so to speak. So how's that gonna work?

882. I think they were just worried about, like, cameras coming to their house,

883. but they know that this is really important to me

884. and that, like, I didn't just meet some guy.

885. That's also not really my style anyway.

886. So they're really excited and they said, "We wanna come get eyes on him."

887. Yeah, I'm sure.

888. We're working out getting them here in person.

889. You guys have a lot to figure out.

890. - Yes, we do. - And what is it you do?

891. So I'm a clean energy consultant.

892. Okay.

893. - A growing field for sure. - Yes, it is.

894. Yeah, it's a lot of job security, which is great.

895. It is important. It is definitely important for our environment.

896. - She had her master's at Johns Hopkins. - Oh, wow, that's impressive.

897. - Thank you. - Very impressive.

898. - We also both have science tattoos. - Yeah.

899. - A bunch of little commonalities. - Yeah. We're extremely compatible.

900. It was weird. I mean, you guys knew going in.

901. We had dinner, I was like,

902. "I highly doubt I'm gonna meet anybody that I really connect with here."

903. And I really felt that way going in.

904. Taylor was the only one I felt my heart getting ripped out of my chest

905. every time I went in to talk to her.

906. And we kept using the word, like, "magnetic."

907. I'd go in there and, like, just something about it.

908. I wanted to be in that room all the time with her

909. and just felt like every atom

910. in my body getting pulled towards her through that wall.

911. Even if we met in the real world, Garrett's really busy.

912. - Would he have had time to meet me? - We wouldn't have met.

913. You wouldn't have met any other way.

914. And if we had met…

915. "I'd like to see you, my schedule's free…"

916. 100%. I wouldn't be free again for another month or more.

917. And it just doesn't— relationship. You can't build a connection that way.

918. Here, you know, I'll see you tomorrow for a couple hours. It felt really right.

919. It's incredible. Incredible.

920. I don't wanna leave her side. Yeah.

921. I'm sure you guys have talked about it, but the hard stuff.

922. 'Cause marriage is compromise.

923. Raising kids and the hard stuff.

924. Tell me about it.

925. Shut your face.

926. Yeah. We've talked about raising kids. We've talked about a lot. We really did.

927. There hasn't been something we're not in alignment on.

928. Especially raising kids.

929. It's such a big life decision to do it so fast.

930. I don't want him hurt, and I'd hate to see you be hurt either.

931. I don't wanna see either one you go through it.

932. I definitely don't want to see him go through it. I adore my son.

933. Yeah.

934. I know your parents love you,

935. and I— ooh!

936. I hate this.

937. And we will grow to love you too.

938. Just it's so fast.

939. This being the only time we actually get to meet you and spend time with you

940. before two weeks later.

941. It's like, hey, we're at y'all's wedding, and it's just very…

942. You're having to make a lot more decisions

943. than what you should have to make in a short amount of time.

944. I feel like you have deadlines, and you're trying to meet those deadlines basically.

945. And it's all out of complete love.

946. It is a lot…

947. in terms of, like, getting to know me,

948. and to trust me and to know me, like, as a person.

949. I don't have any other answer than, like, I love your son a lot,

950. and I see a beautiful, wonderful future with him.

951. And I can see that he's so wonderful

952. because of the place that he came from and the people that matter the most.

953. Because of the expedited timeline and the pressure put on things,

954. we kind of reason that

955. checking in and taking it day by day has gotten us to places

956. that we never thought as individuals we would find each other.

957. And so, it's been actually, like, making us both,

958. like, a lot, I think,

959. stronger in terms of talking about, like, "What are our concerns?"

960. Like, "what are our fears?"

961. Is the common goal, like, ending up with each other at the end

962. and making sure that, like, we're sure,

963. and then everyone else in our lives is, like, trusting our judgment?

964. That's kind of where we landed with it.

965. And also giving each other, like, the grace

966. if we end up changing our hearts and minds about how to go about it.

967. And, you know, Garrett hates when I say this, but I was like,

968. "The best decision for you is gonna be the best decision for me

969. and the best decision for us."

970. Makes sense, yeah.

971. And so just respecting each other, like,

972. regardless of what happens,

973. and, you know, fighting for each other, but being patient.

974. Right.

975. I just wanna thank you in advance if this goes where it needs to go.

976. I hope to be a wonderful addition to your family.

977. We do too. We all hear the love, the care and the concern.

978. - Oh, absolutely. - It's important.

979. Thank you for letting me into your home. It's a beautiful home.

980. - And I— - Thanks.

981. Garrett makes just as much sense as before,

982. but I can see why he's so loving and kind and wonderful.

983. Thank you.

984. - Are you okay? Yeah? - Yeah, I'm good.

985. Honey, I'm home!

986. - I'm sending sexy texts while I'm cooking. - What? Don't!

987. - I saw that when I was cutting, like "Oh…"

988. Did you like that?

989. What is that?

990. - I have garlic on my hands. - Oh, my God!

991. - I love your hair! I love it! - You like it?

992. - I like it more than before. - Yeah? Mm!

993. Mm!

994. How was your day?

995. - Two hours of traffic. Two hours. - Yeah? A lot of traffic?

996. - It's okay. I survived. - Yeah.

997. - How was work today for you? - It's been hectic.

998. Just kind of, like, catching up with, you know, gone for three weeks.

999. - Did you go in? - Uh, no.

1000. I worked from home today.

1001. Must be nice.

1002. Passed by, like, my apartment really quickly

1003. to grab some jackets and some ingredients.

1004. You look pretty hot cooking.

1005. Don't I look cute standing and watching you cook?

1006. Yeah, you just need a little glass of wine.

1007. You can post up and watch me work.

1008. Oh, thank you.

1009. I'm gonna use the bathroom. Get myself together here.

1010. What do you need help with?

1011. - You can watch, enjoy. - Oh, thank God.

1012. - 'Cause I hate cooking! - Take a breather.

1013. How are you with, like, school stuff?

1014. I— what is that face?

1015. I feel overwhelmed!

1016. I know you're, like, struggling with that whole commute.

1017. - The commute is actually killing me. - I was thinking about that.

1018. And I'm glad, like, I'm flexible,

1019. and I'll be able to just move up to Baltimore,

1020. 'cause you don't seem like you would fare too well.

1021. - I would never move. No, no, no. - Yeah.

1022. If you were not willing to move, I don't think this would work.

1023. - Yeah? - I couldn't do the commute.

1024. - That looks nice. - That looks so good, babe.

1025. It also smells good.

1026. I kind of wanna put a…

1027. I'm gonna put these over on our table.

1028. Go sit down. Go sit down.

1029. So we got our soy sauce. This…

1030. Wine.

1031. - Moment of truth. - Mmm!

1032. - Well… - How's that?

1033. The noodles are quite hard, babe. They are al-a dente to the max.

1034. - Al-a who? Is that how it's pronounced? - Al-a dente.

1035. Oh, my God.

1036. - The noodles are not— - Babe, it's so hard!

1037. We needed this because everything's been perfect lately.

1038. - This is a good metaphor for life. - Don't make me gag.

1039. So, wedding question.

1040. Are we doing… a religious officiant,

1041. no religion, spiritual?

1042. - What are we doing? - She needs to be a female.

1043. - Okay. - I don't want a man marrying us.

1044. - No offense to you men. - All right.

1045. No cis-heteros.

1046. Yeah, I will actually take anything else but a cis-hetero.

1047. Okay, and…

1048. Um, spiritual, I guess?

1049. Okay.

1050. God can take a back seat.

1051. My mom would be, like, choking the fuck out right now.

1052. - "Don't marry her!" - My mom does feel a certain way.

1053. She's still very Christian.

1054. If we, like, go through the entire ceremony

1055. and there isn't any sort of, like, Christian element,

1056. she'd kind of be like, "Hmm."

1057. And even though the wedding is for us, it is also for our parents, our mothers.

1058. Do you feel like we should ask her?

1059. My mom would probably come see me before I walk down the aisle

1060. and pray with me or something.

1061. I think that probably would be enough for her.

1062. I used to think I was gonna get married in a temple.

1063. - In a Mormon temple? - In a Mormon temple.

1064. What made you decide that, like,

1065. religion wasn't gonna be part of your life?

1066. I don't hate religion. I guess it sounds like I hate religion.

1067. But when God is white in a church

1068. and you're taught white beliefs when it comes to religion,

1069. you start to believe a lot of those things.

1070. And it's very much men-centric, and, like…

1071. I don't know, especially in the Mormon Church.

1072. I feel like coming from your context, I understand why.

1073. I always tell people, like…

1074. some of the best

1075. people I've met throughout life and some of the nicest

1076. have been, like, Mormon people.

1077. People in the church, like, they're so nice, and they're so giving.

1078. I think it helped me during a really difficult time in life, but…

1079. I just don't want that to be, like, a part of us getting married.

1080. I don't want anyone at the wedding to think that we're getting married

1081. under religious beliefs.

1082. - Hmm. Okay. - Yeah.

1083. I was in ministry. So I know what churches look like behind the scenes.

1084. - I pretty much grew up in a church. - Yeah.

1085. Fire and brimstone. Like either you believe this or you're going to hell.

1086. You know, that type of thing.

1087. But, like, inherently in myself,

1088. like, I've just always felt like something felt off about that.

1089. I probably do still believe…

1090. …I don't know, some version of a Christian God

1091. in some way, maybe. I don't know, but like…

1092. Let's say I die, and like, there is a God, and I'm standing before him,

1093. like, I don't think he's gonna judge me for having questions.

1094. He or she or they.

1095. Yeah, they or whoever.

1096. Yeah, God, whatever God is, like,

1097. I don't think will question me for having legitimate questions.

1098. No.

1099. I think we have past lives.

1100. - Yeah? - Yeah.

1101. - I don't have science behind that. - We need to watch Past Lives, by the way.

1102. We do need to watch Past Lives. We're gonna watch Barbie first.

1103. - What? Barbie? - Barbie.

1104. Babe, don't put Barbie and Past Lives on the same fucking…

1105. No, legitimately, there's such a great message behind Barbie.

1106. Barbie, like, made me realize I'm not accepting any man

1107. who's for the patriarchy.

1108. It took Barbie to make you realize that?

1109. I was working my way up there.

1110. I had to leave the military behind. Nobody—

1111. People do not realize the, like, brainwashing that military does.

1112. And, like, I've been in it my whole life.

1113. I truly believed in the military, and I was very patriotic, and, like…

1114. - Where are you at now with that? - This is icky. It's so bad.

1115. I can't look at the military and say, like, it completely sucks

1116. because it changed my life and provided me opportunities.

1117. When someone says, "Oh, I have all these benefits…"

1118. - At the benefit of what? - The demise of another country?

1119. So you say you support the military.

1120. I don't support half the shit the military does.

1121. What we do in other countries, I don't. I did when I was in military.

1122. James Baldwin, he talked about how because he loves his country so much,

1123. like, he reserves the right to critique it.

1124. Yeah, I like that.

1125. I always take the perspective of people, like, from the outside looking in.

1126. Like, I wasn't born here. I do live here now.

1127. And, like, I understand I'm privileged to live in this country.

1128. At the same time, like, I will always heavily critique how the US

1129. has sort of just destabilized entire countries.

1130. I support the military in the sense of, like, strategically,

1131. we need our military at this point.

1132. We'd be in a very hurt position in this country.

1133. Why would we be in such a hurt position?

1134. Because we put ourselves in this position where we bullied other countries.

1135. We've gone to other countries.

1136. We've destroyed countries, societies, communities.

1137. I do not ignore that.

1138. I am very critical of it.

1139. It's just that I support the troops in the military.

1140. - Okay. Yeah. - The sailors, the soldiers, the Marines.

1141. - I support the people. - The people that are…

1142. They were just like me, and what they sign up to do is not easy.

1143. - And so I support them. - But they sign up for it.

1144. - We do sign up for it. Yeah. - Yeah.

1145. Okay.

1146. Yeah.

1147. It's so nuanced. It's a job to some people.

1148. They sacrifice, like, a lot.

1149. Again, but they're signing up for this, baby.

1150. - You talk about sacrifice… - You have no control over what you do.

1151. They can tell me to run into a building and kill people.

1152. - I have to go do it. - You're signing up for it.

1153. - No one's putting a gun to your head. - No, they're not. They're not.

1154. Yeah, so.

1155. But I will tell you, I didn't understand the gravity of that.

1156. I didn't sign up to go kill people,

1157. even though I technically did join the military.

1158. - It's the military, babe. - Yeah, I know.

1159. The guns and all of that's not there for no reason.

1160. - No, I know, but… - The weapons and, like, the whole…

1161. Call me naive then. I don't know. I just like—

1162. When I was finally put in a position where I was like I push the button

1163. and a missile gets launched off the ship,

1164. 'cause that was one of my positions, I struggled with that

1165. and said, "If y'all tell me to push the button,

1166. I don't think I can push the button to shoot an airplane down."

1167. But I will tell you I didn't understand the gravity of that.

1168. - A lot of kids sign up at the age of 18. - Yeah, yeah.

1169. You know, they see atrocious things.

1170. These service members go over there,

1171. and they're kids, and they do, like, horrible things.

1172. And they, like, it's just…

1173. I don't think we really understand, like,

1174. what we're signing up for when we do it.

1175. Okay.

1176. What?

1177. - No, I was just… - Mm.

1178. I'm feeling judged.

1179. - Are you? I'm sorry. - I'm feeling judged. Like…

1180. Do I even have a right to say

1181. like, I'm anti-military in the politics that they do

1182. and what we've done to other countries,

1183. if I willingly and voluntarily signed up to go do that exact thing?

1184. Am I a hypocrite? Like…

1185. - You're… - My actions in the military.

1186. - What I've done, I've deployed. - I don't want you to feel judged.

1187. You have a great heart, babe. I don't question that.

1188. It's okay, baby.

1189. - I'm uncomfy. - Yeah, it's okay.

1190. It's hard sometimes to, like, look at yourself in the mirror.

1191. Say you were sitting in front of me, you were someone who has been

1192. deeply impacted, like, directly. You were like, "My house was bombed."

1193. I don't know if I would be brave enough

1194. to sit in front of this person and be like,

1195. "But I still support the troops, dude."

1196. "I'm sorry your house got bombed, but I support the troops."

1197. Like, that's a hard thing, 'cause that requires me

1198. to realize, "Yeah, while I was on the Navy ship,

1199. while I didn't push a button to shoot a missile,

1200. I supported operations that did kill people."

1201. I know you don't like my military service.

1202. I don't know if you would have wanted to be engaged to me two years ago.

1203. - Honestly, I probably— - Probably not.

1204. In the pods, I didn't want that to be, like, your sort of defining thing.

1205. - No. - I wanted to get to know you beyond that.

1206. It's been my entire life.

1207. - I grew up on bases since I was two. - Yeah.

1208. And then I did it in high school. I did it in college,

1209. and I did it for the last eight years,

1210. so it's like, it is a huge part of my life.

1211. And I am proud of my service.

1212. I support the troops, babe. I just want you to know.

1213. I don't regret joining the military.

1214. This is not something I want you to, like, be ashamed of, 'cause that's—

1215. - Okay. - Yeah.

1216. - Like, my service, it will— - Mm-hmm.

1217. I don't think I can handle, like, you being ashamed of my service.

1218. I wouldn't, like, want anyone to feel shame about their past.

1219. - Yeah. - As long as it's in your past.

1220. I did try to do the reserves.

1221. And I could not be back in that environment, so I left,

1222. but if I were, like, a reservist, you probably wouldn't be with me.

1223. Yeah.

1224. It probably wouldn't work out 'cause we just stand...

1225. We have, like, very... we would be in very different places.

1226. Yeah.

1227. Um, yeah.

1228. Yeah, that's where I stand.