1. Attention.Copy !req
2. An amateur MMA assholeCopy !req
3. asks you to engage in
aggressive altercation.Copy !req
4. Who the fuck is the
toughest guy in here?Copy !req
5. That'd be me.Copy !req
6. - Bullshit.
- Bopped you so bad in the beanCopy !req
7. you were beyond ass-backwards.Copy !req
8. No blood, albeit bloody brutal.Copy !req
9. - Clunk.
- Clocked your carriage,Copy !req
10. clipped your canopy,
caught your consciousCopy !req
11. with a carefully concocted
combative cuffing.Copy !req
12. - Dink.
- Decked you defiantly.Copy !req
13. - Easy.
- Ended you efficiently.Copy !req
14. - Fuckin'...
- Fucked your face upCopy !req
15. from front to Finland in
a fairly unfair fashionCopy !req
16. unfortunately for females.Copy !req
17. - Goof.
- So you got up,Copy !req
18. gathered your goods, guts and gonads,Copy !req
19. got after the goofy goon,
gave glory a good go.Copy !req
20. - Have at 'er.
- Hucked a haymaker.Copy !req
21. - Instantly.
- Irked the idiot.Copy !req
22. - Jackass.
- Out-juked the jerk.Copy !req
23. Out-jabbed the joker.
Out-jammed the juice head.Copy !req
24. - K.
- King Kong threw a karate kickCopy !req
25. that kinda caught you in the kisser.Copy !req
26. - Loser.
- But that legend lady luckCopy !req
27. was lingering and you left youCopy !req
28. with only a lovely
little lump on your lip.Copy !req
29. - Mint.
- But maybe mentionCopy !req
30. you may use MMA, Mr. Muay Thai.Copy !req
31. - Nincompoop.
- Knees are unnecessary.Copy !req
32. - Over it.
- Okay, onwards.Copy !req
33. - Please.
- You out-punched the prick.Copy !req
34. Out-played the peasant.Copy !req
35. Pushed proper pugnacity on the pinhead,Copy !req
36. left him praying for peaceCopy !req
37. while Peter Piper picked
a peck of pickled peppers.Copy !req
38. - Quickly.
- He got queasy,Copy !req
39. wanted to quit, folks were
quoted as quietly quippingCopy !req
40. he looked like a quirky,
quackish queen on Quaaludes.Copy !req
41. - Right.
- Roughed up the rook.Copy !req
42. Wrecked his reality. Ruined his rep.Copy !req
43. - Superb.
- You socked the sucker.Copy !req
44. Slammed the sally. Secured the scuffleCopy !req
45. by successfully out-scrapping the skirt.Copy !req
46. - Tremendous.
- You took over the tiff.Copy !req
47. Out-tangoed the tosser.Copy !req
48. Tough titties on that
trade, you twit. No truce.Copy !req
49. - Unreal.
- Utterly.Copy !req
50. - Violent.
- Very.Copy !req
51. - Wonderful.
- Well, whatever...Copy !req
52. - Exceptional.
- Exactly.Copy !req
53. - Yup.
- Yup.Copy !req
54. - Zebra?
- Zip it.Copy !req
55. Tell us about your
date last night, Wayne.Copy !req
56. Hard to the fuckin' no.Copy !req
57. Pitter-patter.Copy !req
58. Oh, I'd rather have a
cup-a-fart in the face.Copy !req
59. What's cup-a-fart?Copy !req
60. Oh, that's when you farts into your handCopy !req
61. and then cup it like you're
transporting a tiny birdCopy !req
62. and release it into the
face of an unsuspecting pal.Copy !req
63. There could be worse things.Copy !req
64. You're up!Copy !req
65. Well, for starters, I ran late chorin',Copy !req
66. so I didn't have time
to get the truck washedCopy !req
67. - before I went over there.
- So?Copy !req
68. Well, so what if Dad's standing thereCopy !req
69. when I come up the lanewayCopy !req
70. to pick up his daughter
with a dirty truck?Copy !req
71. - He'd say, "Who's this tit?"
- Fair.Copy !req
72. And I barely got the truck in
park before she hops in thereCopy !req
73. so I can't get the door for her.Copy !req
74. - So?
- Well, so what ifCopy !req
75. Mom's standing there
and I come up the lanewayCopy !req
76. to pick up her daughter and
I don't get the door for her?Copy !req
77. She'd say, "Who's this nut tugger?"Copy !req
78. - Fair.
- I couldn't get my footingCopy !req
79. after the rocky startCopy !req
80. so nothin' to report thereafter, fuck.Copy !req
81. Well, you lived to fight another day.Copy !req
82. Well, I am lookin' for love.Copy !req
83. Boy, howdy.Copy !req
84. Like I've been going on datesCopy !req
85. and will be going on other dates.Copy !req
86. - Get after it.
- Like if there was a general theme,Copy !req
87. like, for the next six weeks,Copy !req
88. it would be, "Wayne's looking for love."Copy !req
89. Could be worse things.Copy !req
90. - Gentlemen.
- How're ya now?Copy !req
91. - Perfect.
- Good 'n you?Copy !req
92. Same bat time. Same bat channel.Copy !req
93. Eh, shirt-tuckers?Copy !req
94. Now, I'd say give your balls a tug,Copy !req
95. but it looks like your
pants are doing that for you.Copy !req
96. You look like you could lose a
hand in there playin' pocket pool.Copy !req
97. Here's a poem.Copy !req
98. Star light, star bright,Copy !req
99. why the fuck you got earrings on?Copy !req
100. Bet your lobes ain't the only thing
that got a hole punched in 'em.Copy !req
101. See the muscle shirt came today.Copy !req
102. - Muscles comin' tomorrow?
- You get a tracking number?Copy !req
103. Oh, I hope he got a tracking number.Copy !req
104. That package is gonna be smaller than
the one you're currently sporting.Copy !req
105. - Tall order, Dary.
- You ever had a cup-a-fart?Copy !req
106. You can cup-a-fuck off.Copy !req
107. Hey, Katy.Copy !req
108. Hi, Dan.Copy !req
109. Gentlemen.Copy !req
110. Seatbelt.Copy !req
111. That kid's a polished turd.Copy !req
112. Heard about you and your sweetie, buddy.Copy !req
113. Heard she cheated on you, buddy.Copy !req
114. That's a real kick in the knackers, bro.Copy !req
115. Just a real ouchie, bro.Copy !req
116. Wait, does Stewart get points
for opening Katy's door?Copy !req
117. Johnny Cash could have
stepped out of that shit boxCopy !req
118. and I'd still say,
"Why is it not clean?"Copy !req
119. Well, should we jump
into Dary's shit boxCopy !req
120. and go to the Ags Hall?Copy !req
121. Now, I know McMurray's meetings
can be a bits of a chore.Copy !req
122. Even worse when Mrs. McMurray's there.Copy !req
123. But the Ags Hall is as
much ours as anyone else's,Copy !req
124. and we should be there for
the important decisions-making.Copy !req
125. Squirrelly Dan, you'll be
snoring within the first fiveCopy !req
126. and I'd bet as many bucks on it.Copy !req
127. Well, I had my coffee today
so I will takes that bet.Copy !req
128. You don't need to shake, I trust ya.Copy !req
129. It's 'cause I cup-a-fart, isn't it?Copy !req
130. That was a very productiveCopy !req
131. first hour and 45 minutes, I must say.Copy !req
132. On to item number 29 of 39.Copy !req
133. Yep!Copy !req
134. It's still item number 28,
baby. Item 28 is a two-part item.Copy !req
135. Huh! Thank you, darlin'.Copy !req
136. You're welcome, baby.Copy !req
137. All right, on to item 28, part B.Copy !req
138. I, McMurray, motion that the
front weather mat be changed,Copy !req
139. from a Remington charcoal,
four-foot by eight-footCopy !req
140. by three-millimeter
thick rubber doormat,Copy !req
141. to a raisin charcoalCopy !req
142. three-foot by six-foot
by three-millimeter thickCopy !req
143. ribbed vinyl boot tray.Copy !req
144. It came in a gainsboro Grey also,
which is a pale tone of Grey.Copy !req
145. - That's correct. It also came in puce.
- Puce is a warm Grey, tonally.Copy !req
146. Grey tones don't clean
up as well as dark tones.Copy !req
147. Hence, the raisin charcoal.Copy !req
148. Better look goddamn clean after
you're done cleanin' the cocksucker,Copy !req
149. - that's what I always say.
- Mmm-hmm.Copy !req
150. Would a member second my motion?Copy !req
151. I second, baby.Copy !req
152. - I second so hard.
- Thank you, baby,Copy !req
153. I knew you'd second the
shit right out of it.Copy !req
154. Dan!Copy !req
155. - Daniel.
- Mm, he's a real deep sleeper.Copy !req
156. Oh, super deep.Copy !req
157. Like he fell asleep at the
IMAX during Transformers 2.Copy !req
158. Fell asleep riding the back
of a garbage truck one time.Copy !req
159. - Intolerable.
- Daniel!Copy !req
160. Do you know dogs sleep
for 80% of their lives?Copy !req
161. You wanna know what?
He might be faking it.Copy !req
162. - He's faking it.
- Oh, he's faking it.Copy !req
163. - I can see he's faking it.
- Are you faking it, Dan?Copy !req
164. Look, I can see one
of his eyes are open.Copy !req
165. - Yeah, he's faking it.
- Daniel!Copy !req
166. Don't touch it, it hurts.Copy !req
167. You better cut out all
that goddamn snoringCopy !req
168. before I stuff a cocksuckin' work sockCopy !req
169. down your skull cave.Copy !req
170. Keep going, baby. Everybody's listening.Copy !req
171. - Everybody loves you.
- Thank you, darlin'.Copy !req
172. You better listen to her, Daniel.Copy !req
173. Now,Copy !req
174. I'm sure you no doubt
have all noticed thatCopy !req
175. we are down to one dozen coat
hangers in the front hall.Copy !req
176. There are approximately
twelve dozen in the rear hall.Copy !req
177. All standard steel wire, baby?Copy !req
178. All standard steel wire in
a flattened triangular shape.Copy !req
179. I, McMurray, motion that one dozen
be transported to the front hall.Copy !req
180. - K.
- Wayne.Copy !req
181. Wayne, Wayne, Wayne. Wayne. Wayne.Copy !req
182. Wayne. Look at me, Wayne. Wayne.Copy !req
183. There is a tried, tested
and true system at work here.Copy !req
184. And, as President of
the Agricultural Hall,Copy !req
185. I must demand it be respected.Copy !req
186. One member makes a motion.Copy !req
187. Then another member
then seconds that motion.Copy !req
188. Second, K.Copy !req
189. K is not a second.Copy !req
190. Well, it's the second time I said "K".Copy !req
191. So you second my motion?Copy !req
192. You want to know what? I'm
all out of seconds, bud.Copy !req
193. So it's not a second?Copy !req
194. Well, this is taking too many
seconds is what I'm saying.Copy !req
195. Well, you only have to second once.Copy !req
196. All right, give me a second.Copy !req
197. So are you saying that you
second or that you need a second?Copy !req
198. - Well, one second.
- All right.Copy !req
199. Wayne, you shall be given one second.Copy !req
200. Whilst Wayne is taking one second...Copy !req
201. I second the fuckin' motion, McMurray!Copy !req
202. Now move the fuckin' coat hangers!Copy !req
203. Well, thank you, Wayne.Copy !req
204. Let the secretary note that I, McMurray,Copy !req
205. motioned to move one
dozen coat hangers...Copy !req
206. I'll move the fuckin'
coat hangers myself.Copy !req
207. Can't sit around here all fucking
day with my horn in my hands.Copy !req
208. Got chorin' to do, for fuck's sake.Copy !req
209. Would the secretary note that
aforementioned coat hangersCopy !req
210. have such been moved.Copy !req
211. Thanks to a very over-zealous beaver.Copy !req
212. There's order, people,
and it must be followed.Copy !req
213. Concluded!Copy !req
214. Item 30 of 39.Copy !req
215. Wayne.Copy !req
216. Jim Dickins. How're ya now?Copy !req
217. - Good 'n you?
- Not so bad.Copy !req
218. Wayne, 100% bullsit 'round here.Copy !req
219. Got a bidder now, one.Copy !req
220. Lookin' at two. Two, and
now at lookin' at three.Copy !req
221. Three hundred now, can I get a four?Copy !req
222. Four there now, sold.Copy !req
223. 400% bullshit 'round here.Copy !req
224. Well, it's never so bad
it couldn't be worse.Copy !req
225. Worse than 400% sounds an
awful lot to me like five...Copy !req
226. 500%, now lookin' at six.Copy !req
227. 600%, lookin' at seven.Copy !req
228. 700%, can I get an eight?Copy !req
229. Sold.Copy !req
230. 800% bullshit 'round here.Copy !req
231. Well, meetings run a C-hair longCopy !req
232. but it's important business so...Copy !req
233. If someone doesn't do something
about this bullshit soon...Copy !req
234. We'll be at nine.Copy !req
235. 900%, now lookin' at 10.Copy !req
236. Ten over there, now lookin' at 11.Copy !req
237. - Can I get a 12...
- All right.Copy !req
238. All right, cool it.Copy !req
239. What would you have him do, there, Jim?Copy !req
240. If Wayne runs for Ag Hall
president, I'll give him...Copy !req
241. One vote right here, looking at one,Copy !req
242. we got one vote here,
and lookin' to get two...Copy !req
243. Well, see, now that sounds
a bit dramatic to me, Jim.Copy !req
244. No. I don't think
that's such a bad idea.Copy !req
245. Did that not sound a
bit dramatic to you?Copy !req
246. I'd back that.Copy !req
247. Well, it's bloody Shakespearean.Copy !req
248. It'd be usurpin' the throne.Copy !req
249. I'd back that like a spinal cord.Copy !req
250. It just sounds dramatic to me.Copy !req
251. - Jim!
- Tell you what, Jim...Copy !req
252. I'll think on it.Copy !req
253. Have a good one.Copy !req
254. Have a good one, Jim.Copy !req
255. One little birdie
bird flying in the sky.Copy !req
256. We got two little birds
and we're lookin' at three.Copy !req
257. Three little birdies,
now we're lookin' at four.Copy !req
258. Why do birds suddenly appear
every time I auctioneer?Copy !req
259. Just a series of bad bouncesCopy !req
260. for a couple of stick
and pucksters, bud.Copy !req
261. Not getting the bounces, bro.Copy !req
262. Cut from the Letterkenny ShamrocksCopy !req
263. in our overage year, bud.Copy !req
264. No victory lap for the Shammy's, bro.Copy !req
265. No victory lap, Ferda.Copy !req
266. Ferda.Copy !req
267. And no Katy.Copy !req
268. - Katy-Kat stepped out.
- Two-timed.Copy !req
269. - Played around.
- Caught a matinee.Copy !req
270. Carried on.Copy !req
271. You know, I should be mad,
but I'm just sort of...Copy !req
272. Sad.Copy !req
273. Give your balls a tug, you tit fucker!Copy !req
274. Not gonna miss playing
with Shoresy, though, bud.Copy !req
275. Always a silver lining, buddy.Copy !req
276. You know, bud, he's right.Copy !req
277. Game faces on, it's our first
day of senior hockey, bud.Copy !req
278. Well, first impression's
a lasting one, bro.Copy !req
279. Are you ready for this, bud?Copy !req
280. Fore-check, back-check, pay check, bro.Copy !req
281. Ding!Copy !req
282. What the fuck are you doing?Copy !req
283. - What does it look like?
- Doing legs.Copy !req
284. Leg day!Copy !req
285. Where's Stormy been? I
haven't seen her all day.Copy !req
286. - In her pen.
- Why?Copy !req
287. - She's being punished.
- Why?Copy !req
288. She tried to kill her stud again.Copy !req
289. That's my girl.Copy !req
290. Why?Copy !req
291. Well, fucked if I know, Dan.Copy !req
292. It's supposed to be natural
for animals to want to breed.Copy !req
293. And fucked if those pups wouldn't
be as beautiful as she is.Copy !req
294. She was a beautiful pup.Copy !req
295. She's a beautiful dog.Copy !req
296. - She was a gorgeous pup.
- Well, she's a gorgeous dog.Copy !req
297. But why is she in her pen?Copy !req
298. It's 'cause aggression's
to be discouraged.Copy !req
299. It's like Cesar Millan says,Copy !req
300. exercise, discipline and affection,Copy !req
301. in that order.Copy !req
302. I'd have a Bloody Caesar.Copy !req
303. Do you wanna know what?
I'd have a Caesar, too.Copy !req
304. I could have a Caesar if
you guys are havin' Caesars.Copy !req
305. Hard to see a Caesar
and not want a Caesar.Copy !req
306. That's actually how they market Caesars.Copy !req
307. You should call up Gail
over at her Bed and Biscuits.Copy !req
308. I bet ya she's got
some studs for Stormy.Copy !req
309. Well, better to let the dust settleCopy !req
310. on Modean's burn-down before I bug her.Copy !req
311. We need a new bar in this town.Copy !req
312. But why's Stormy trying
to kill all her studs?Copy !req
313. 'Cause they're sayin'
the wrong things, likely,Copy !req
314. just like humans.Copy !req
315. First line better be a winner.Copy !req
316. First impression's a lasting one.Copy !req
317. Like what?Copy !req
318. Well, to be honest,Copy !req
319. I've taken to breaking the ice
with the lyrics from '90s pop songs.Copy !req
320. The words are penetrating because
she's likely heard 'em before,Copy !req
321. but she likely won't realize
it when they're spokenCopy !req
322. rather than sung with
musical accompaniment.Copy !req
323. Five bucks says you cannot
successfully sell me on this.Copy !req
324. Hey, girl, give me your heart.Copy !req
325. Make it real or else forget about it.Copy !req
326. That's Rob Thomas and Carlos Santanas.Copy !req
327. K.Copy !req
328. Hey, girl. I wanna stand
with you on a mountainCopy !req
329. and I wanna bathe with you in the sea.Copy !req
330. Savage Gardens.Copy !req
331. Uh-oh.Copy !req
332. Hey, girl,Copy !req
333. I swear by the moon,Copy !req
334. the stars in the sky, I'll be there.Copy !req
335. All-4-Ones.Copy !req
336. Well,Copy !req
337. fuck a duck.Copy !req
338. Hey, girl, I'll make love to youCopy !req
339. like you want me to,
then I'll hold you tight,Copy !req
340. baby all through the night.Copy !req
341. Are you talking to me,
you fuckin' greaser?Copy !req
342. You don't talk to me like
that, you fuckin' pud.Copy !req
343. - Argh!
- I'll beat the shit outta you.Copy !req
344. Ah! Don't!Copy !req
345. You're real good at beatin' up DaryCopy !req
346. and that's what I
appreciates about you, Katy.Copy !req
347. Oh, is that what you
appreciate about me?Copy !req
348. I'll stake 20 to 25% off her
over there, Squirrely Dan.Copy !req
349. Hey, Roald, uh,Copy !req
350. I bet you have a name for your bong.Copy !req
351. - Samwise Ganja.
- Cool.Copy !req
352. Formerly known as Paul Tokenfold.Copy !req
353. - Awesome.
- Formerly known as Air Bud.Copy !req
354. Hey, maybe your next one can be calledCopy !req
355. Air Bud 2: Golden Receiver.Copy !req
356. All right, guys, we're outty.Copy !req
357. Peace.Copy !req
358. Peace.Copy !req
359. Bye, guys.Copy !req
360. Bye, Stewart, not Katy.Copy !req
361. Pardon?Copy !req
362. Huh?Copy !req
363. I'll be in the car.Copy !req
364. Cool, baby.Copy !req
365. Devon,Copy !req
366. you may elaborate on your entanglement.Copy !req
367. And, Roald, your exasperation.Copy !req
368. Cool, babe.Copy !req
369. Speak!Copy !req
370. My entanglementCopy !req
371. is that when that came along,Copy !req
372. that started happening.Copy !req
373. Seriously, Stewart what
are you even wearing?Copy !req
374. It's so gay.Copy !req
375. - But you're gay.
- So what?Copy !req
376. He's a homophobe now, too.Copy !req
377. - No!
- Yes!Copy !req
378. I was born this way, Stewart!Copy !req
379. We don't even know where
you are half the time.Copy !req
380. We're going to the Weeknd show.Copy !req
381. It's Tuesday.Copy !req
382. No, The Weeknd is here.Copy !req
383. In three days, yeah.Copy !req
384. No, I mean The Weeknd is here today.Copy !req
385. - No, it isn't.
- Yes, he is.Copy !req
386. Who is "he"?Copy !req
387. The Weeknd.Copy !req
388. Wow! Slightly sexist statementCopy !req
389. to say Saturday and Sunday
are the masculine ones.Copy !req
390. He's a misogynist now, too!Copy !req
391. - No.
- Yes!Copy !req
392. I mean we are going to
see The Weeknd perform.Copy !req
393. She's got you totally brainwashed, man.Copy !req
394. You don't even know what day it is.Copy !req
395. I was born this way, Stewart.Copy !req
396. - Ahh!
- No, no, no!Copy !req
397. Did you just stab me with an EpiPen?Copy !req
398. Pain is good.Copy !req
399. Taste three mills.Copy !req
400. Oh!Copy !req
401. Oh! What?Copy !req
402. If any bees come in
here we are so fucked!Copy !req
403. Don't open those peanut M&Ms, Connor!Copy !req
404. Epinephrine OD.Copy !req
405. Well, uh, Jimmy Dickskin...Copy !req
406. Dickins.Copy !req
407. Dickskin, that's what I said.Copy !req
408. You motioned for an emergency
meeting and that's why we're all here.Copy !req
409. Goddamn Dickskin's cuttin'
into my gin and tonic time,Copy !req
410. that's all I know.Copy !req
411. Dickins!Copy !req
412. That's what I said, Dickskin.Copy !req
413. All right, well, Dickskin,
you can have the floor.Copy !req
414. Dickskin.Copy !req
415. After, of course, we explore the
several Agricultural Hall related issuesCopy !req
416. that I have detected
within the last 24 hours.Copy !req
417. Pick one!Copy !req
418. Well, as I've mentioned,
there are severalCopy !req
419. so we will begin with one of them.Copy !req
420. Well, don't bore us, get to the chorus.Copy !req
421. Wayne, you're uh, acting fairly curt.Copy !req
422. I'll be fuckin' CourtneyCopy !req
423. if it gets us through
this before Christmas.Copy !req
424. I motion Wayne assumeCopy !req
425. the title of President of the Ag HallCopy !req
426. effective immediately.Copy !req
427. All those in favor, gonna need one vote.Copy !req
428. Do we have one vote?
Are we lookin' at one?Copy !req
429. One over here, now we're gonna need two.Copy !req
430. Two down, we got two. Lookin' at threeCopy !req
431. for Wayne for president
and we'll get it over there.Copy !req
432. Now gonna get four,
gonna get four over here.Copy !req
433. Now we're gonna have four over
here for Wayne for President.Copy !req
434. Can we get five? What've we got, five?Copy !req
435. Five over here now!
We're getting into six.Copy !req
436. Six over here, feels good over here,Copy !req
437. now we're lookin' at seven.Copy !req
438. Seven over here now, can
I get an eight? Eight now,Copy !req
439. - can we get any more here?
- You shit.Copy !req
440. No nine, that's all
right, for my friend Wayne.Copy !req
441. Celebrate good times. Baby get along.Copy !req
442. Sold!Copy !req
443. This is a fuckin' outrage.Copy !req
444. You're out of order!
This... It wasn't...Copy !req
445. It wasn't motioned.Copy !req
446. That's not the right way.Copy !req
447. There wasn't a motion.Copy !req
448. Well, you're about to find out
how hard this job really is.Copy !req
449. You're in the hot seat now, big boy.Copy !req
450. It is fuckin' pipin' hot.Copy !req
451. Like 1500 goddamn watts.Copy !req
452. Well, you're gonna run 'er.Copy !req
453. I love you.Copy !req
454. I love you, so much.Copy !req
455. Anything pressing?Copy !req
456. Back to chorin'.Copy !req
457. Gotta break the ice here, boys.Copy !req
458. We gotta get the ball rolling, bro.Copy !req
459. First impression's gotta be a good one.Copy !req
460. First impression's a lasting one, buddy.Copy !req
461. You thinking what I'm thinking?Copy !req
462. Great minds think alike, buddy.Copy !req
463. You boys wanna go wheel
some snipes after praccy?Copy !req
464. Wheel snipe celly, boys.Copy !req
465. Dirty fuckin' dangles, boys.Copy !req
466. I'm married, you little bitch.Copy !req
467. Yorkie?Copy !req
468. Happily married. Scholtzy?Copy !req
469. I love my wife, pussy. Fisky?Copy !req
470. I'd fallen in with the wrong
crowd, went down a dark path.Copy !req
471. My wife saved me. Boomtown?Copy !req
472. I love my wife like I love doing legs.Copy !req
473. - Okay.
- All right. Um...Copy !req
474. You guys wanna grab
some sandos after praccy?Copy !req
475. Crush some appies?Copy !req
476. I'm gluten-free, you little bitch.Copy !req
477. Yorkie?Copy !req
478. Fuck gluten. Scholtzy?Copy !req
479. Gluten gives me gravy pants, pussy.Copy !req
480. Fisky?Copy !req
481. Gluten-free, dairy-free, gaseous
intestinal by-product-free.Copy !req
482. Boomtown?Copy !req
483. I love gluten-free living
like I love my wife.Copy !req
484. - Okay.
- Uh, yeah.Copy !req
485. What... What do you guys like to do?Copy !req
486. Winning, you little bitch.Copy !req
487. Yorkie?Copy !req
488. Love winning. Scholtzy?Copy !req
489. Winning red ribbons, pussy.Copy !req
490. Fisky?Copy !req
491. Winning hardware,
winning gold. Boomtown?Copy !req
492. I love winning like I
love gluten-free livin'.Copy !req
493. Okay, we really need
to pull out the big gunsCopy !req
494. on this one here, buddy.Copy !req
495. Dig deep. Bear down, buddy, okay?Copy !req
496. Have you boys ever heard of dinker-ball?Copy !req
497. How about a round of dinker-ball, boys?Copy !req
498. Dinker-ball?Copy !req
499. Okay, I got this.Copy !req
500. Okay... You see, you grab
your dink or your ball.Copy !req
501. You scrunch it up in your hand
and then someone has to guessCopy !req
502. whether it's a dink or a ball.Copy !req
503. Dink or ball?Copy !req
504. You fuckin' serious right now?Copy !req
505. We don't want to see your junk, Schmelt.Copy !req
506. Put your junk away, Schmelt.Copy !req
507. - Uh, Schmelt?
- What's Schmelt?Copy !req
508. So the schmelts want
to play games, Yorkie.Copy !req
509. Yeah, I think we got a game
for the schmelts, Barts.Copy !req
510. You like games, right?Copy !req
511. Sure.Copy !req
512. You're out.Copy !req
513. - Out of what?
- This.Copy !req
514. - What's this?
- This...Copy !req
515. Is not your crew anymore.Copy !req
516. This is not your life anymore.Copy !req
517. This is not the weekend.Copy !req
518. It's Tuesday.Copy !req
519. - But this is...
- Not your basement anymore.Copy !req
520. This is my basement now.Copy !req
521. And you are not welcome.Copy !req
522. Are those loaded?Copy !req
523. Only one way to find out.Copy !req
524. The great playwright Anton ChekhovCopy !req
525. invented the principle of Chekhov's Gun.Copy !req
526. What is the principle of Chekhov's Gun?Copy !req
527. Ha!Copy !req
528. If in the first act you
say a gun is in the room,Copy !req
529. then in the second act,Copy !req
530. it must absolutelyCopy !req
531. go off.Copy !req
532. In other words, if
you're gonna bring heat,Copy !req
533. you better use it.Copy !req
534. I'm preheated to 375,Copy !req
535. ready to go to 425, big boy.Copy !req
536. Blast off, Major Dongfucker.Copy !req
537. You schmelts ever
played Duck, Duck, Goose?Copy !req
538. Yeah, with the four-to
six-year-old groupCopy !req
539. we had at hockey summer camp.Copy !req
540. What are we, four-to
six-year-olds, boys?Copy !req
541. I guess you're four-to six-year-olds.Copy !req
542. You schmelts ready?Copy !req
543. Close your eyes.Copy !req
544. Duck.Copy !req
545. Duck.Copy !req
546. Duck.Copy !req
547. Duck.Copy !req
548. Duck.Copy !req
549. Goose!Copy !req
550. Schmelts are gongshows, boys.Copy !req
551. Schmelts are gongers.Copy !req
552. This is better than doing
legs, you little bitch. Yorkie?Copy !req
553. Let's do legs right now. Scholtzy?Copy !req
554. I love doing legs, pussy. Fisky?Copy !req
555. Stairs. Works calves,
quads, glutes. Boomtown?Copy !req
556. I love doing stairs like I love winning.Copy !req
557. Let's do this, boys!Copy !req
558. How many games in this season, buddy?Copy !req
559. 42, buddy.Copy !req
560. Do you have any baby wipes?Copy !req
561. I don't, buddy.Copy !req
562. There's been...Copy !req
563. An uprising.Copy !req
564. K.Copy !req
565. - I'm homeless.
- K.Copy !req
566. - Wayne.
- Hard no.Copy !req
567. If a man asks you for
help, you help him.Copy !req
568. You're gonna work the
ground game, then, huh, Katy?Copy !req
569. If you asked me for help...Copy !req
570. I would help you.Copy !req
571. Oh, look, they're comin'
land, sea and air now.Copy !req
572. - You can stay here.
- Wondrous!Copy !req
573. For a couple of days.Copy !req
574. Favorable.Copy !req
575. That's 48 hours, max.Copy !req
576. Satisfactory.Copy !req
577. We'll put your shit
in the spare bedroom.Copy !req
578. Come on.Copy !req
579. Hold it!Copy !req
580. End of the laneway. Don't
come on the property.Copy !req
581. - Rematch.
- K.Copy !req
582. Knocked you out. Can't
believe you got back up.Copy !req
583. You come here to throw fists
or flap lips there, big shooter?Copy !req
584. You suckered him.Copy !req
585. Still knocked him the fuck out.Copy !req
586. Then he got back up and knocked you out.Copy !req
587. - So rubber match then.
- We already established that.Copy !req
588. Unless you wanna do some more talking.Copy !req
589. Good amount of chin-wagging
goin' on over there.Copy !req
590. All right, I suckered you.Copy !req
591. So we shake hands, clear
the air, then we square off.Copy !req
592. Good enough.Copy !req
593. You're fuckin' 10 ply, bud.Copy !req