1. Hit me! Big ten!Copy !req
2. Double down!Copy !req
3. Little one. Yes!Copy !req
4. $50,000 a hand on two tables
for the last 12 hours.Copy !req
5. You gotta love Big Willie. How are the
plans going for his daughter's wedding?Copy !req
6. Great. The east ballroom,
decked out with...Copy !req
7. Show me some good love!Copy !req
8. Sam's wrangled up 1,000 live
Maine lobsters, arriving within the hour.Copy !req
9. Lobster!Copy !req
10. Okay. The man loves his shellfish.Copy !req
11. I've booked Michael Bublé
to sing at the reception.Copy !req
12. Who? Trust me, he's great.Copy !req
13. Big Willie's daughter is a huge fan.Copy !req
14. She's going to have
one hell of a wedding.Copy !req
15. Yeah, nothing but the best
for Sam's number one client.Copy !req
16. Blackjack!Copy !req
17. No change the dealer.Copy !req
18. Mary, hi. Hi.Copy !req
19. We were just wondering about
the soap in our rooms.Copy !req
20. Yes. Certified organic.
No tallow or animal testing.Copy !req
21. I promise you, your convention will not
only be enjoyable, it'll be cruelty-free.Copy !req
22. Michael, hi. Thanks. Hi.Copy !req
23. Hi. I'm Mary Connell. I am so
happy that you're able to make it.Copy !req
24. I didn't have much of a choice.
I was all set to play London...Copy !req
25. and the next thing I know
my agent and manager arrive...Copy !req
26. on a Montecito jet and drag me
down here. So, you're not upset?Copy !req
27. No, I just haven't played
a private party in years.Copy !req
28. I was thinking maybe I could try something
new for Big Willie and his daughter.Copy !req
29. You know, keep things fresh.
Fresh is good.Copy !req
30. Good. I got some ideas.
I'll run them by you later?Copy !req
31. That sounds great. Okay. Bye.Copy !req
32. I'm sorry, I'm not in the business
of looking after out-of-town guests.Copy !req
33. That's Sam's job.Copy !req
34. You don't have to entertain him,
just keep him company for a few hours.Copy !req
35. I'm buried at work. Believe
me, you won't regret it.Copy !req
36. Still trying to pawn off
your ninth grade boyfriend?Copy !req
37. He wasn't just my boyfriend.Copy !req
38. When I met Jay, we had just
moved for the third time in a year.Copy !req
39. My 14th school in all.
No one would talk to me.Copy !req
40. God, girls can be so mean. I
just needed someone to talk to.Copy !req
41. I needed a friend.
And that's when I met Jay.Copy !req
42. He was always there for me,
no matter what.Copy !req
43. Didn't you break his nose?
Only after he tried to kiss me.Copy !req
44. That doesn't sound like you
at all. I used to be a tomboy.Copy !req
45. That's quite a change. Promise me...Copy !req
46. both of you, you'll be nice.Copy !req
47. Dee?Copy !req
48. Please.Copy !req
49. I promise I'll be nice. Me, too.Copy !req
50. Mike? Hey.Copy !req
51. What's new? Three
drunks, two card counters...Copy !req
52. and a guy who insisted he
was Elvis demanded a free room.Copy !req
53. Really? I mean, was it him?
Was it the King?Copy !req
54. More like the queen,
he was wearing a dress.Copy !req
55. Surveillance. What? When? Thanks.Copy !req
56. Someone just stole
a lobster delivery truck.Copy !req
57. Where's Danny?Copy !req
58. Yeah? Yeah, I'm way
ahead of you on this one, Ed.Copy !req
59. Nothing to worry.Copy !req
60. I'll get back to you.Copy !req
61. So, why Vegas? The
last items on my to-do list.Copy !req
62. To-do list? I have four more to go.Copy !req
63. Witness a desert sunrise,
sing over the canals of Venice...Copy !req
64. and skydive over Sin City.
That's only three.Copy !req
65. You always save the best for last.Copy !req
66. Make love to the first girl I ever kissed.Copy !req
67. That's so sweet.Copy !req
68. Delinda, you were
the first girl I ever kissed.Copy !req
69. That last one might take
you some time. I hope not.Copy !req
70. I only have a month to live.
I'm dying of cancer.Copy !req
71. So, you guys let us know
if you find anything, okay?Copy !req
72. Traffic control followed
the truck over the 15...Copy !req
73. but by the time Metro had any
cars in the area, it was long gone.Copy !req
74. I need you to find the son of a
bitch who stole the truck, all right?Copy !req
75. Ed, with all due respect,
they stole lobsters.Copy !req
76. Yeah, lobsters for Big Willie Chen.Copy !req
77. On his last visit, he dropped $10 million.Copy !req
78. Stay! Double down!Copy !req
79. Inoperable and untreatable.Copy !req
80. Doctors gave me six months
to live five months ago.Copy !req
81. What kind of cancer? I
don't want to talk about it.Copy !req
82. It just bums me out.Copy !req
83. If you were really sick,
wouldn't you be in a hospital?Copy !req
84. If there's nothing they can do for you,Copy !req
85. lying around in a cancer ward...Copy !req
86. is depressing, not to
mention a total waste of time.Copy !req
87. Yeah, and trying to sleep with me isn't?Copy !req
88. Not if there's a chance you'll say yes.Copy !req
89. You forget I've known you
since the ninth grade...Copy !req
90. and still remember all
those pranks you used to pull.Copy !req
91. Pranks? Me?Copy !req
92. Like at graduation, you had all
the diplomas printed in invisible ink.Copy !req
93. Saying you have cancer just to get
me into bed would be right up your alley.Copy !req
94. Except this time it's not funny.
That's because it's not a joke.Copy !req
95. This is all we have. It looks like a foot.Copy !req
96. I was thinking foot, too.Copy !req
97. Well, then...Copy !req
98. I guess our work is
done here today, boys.Copy !req
99. We were robbed by a foot.Copy !req
100. I can't believe you lost my lobsters.Copy !req
101. Nobody lost your lobsters.
They were stolen.Copy !req
102. Ed, Big Willie invited his
closest, dearest...Copy !req
103. Okay, richest friends to his daughter's
wedding. I planned on harpooning...Copy !req
104. a few stray whales before they
migrated out of town. I need my lobsters.Copy !req
105. Well, then, Captain Ahab, I
suggest you hunt some more down.Copy !req
106. Yes, sir.Copy !req
107. Hit me again! Yes! Hit!Copy !req
108. Desert sunrise, sing in front of
thousands, or skydive over the city?Copy !req
109. I'm definitely not jumping out of a plane.Copy !req
110. So then it's decided. We're skydiving.Copy !req
111. I don't think you heard
me. I said no. Okay.Copy !req
112. Then sleep with me.
I'm not doing that either.Copy !req
113. Nessa, some of the
best memories I have...Copy !req
114. are because I did things
that I swore I never would do.Copy !req
115. Like running with the bulls in
Pamplona. Let's stick with skydiving.Copy !req
116. Okay. Okay.Copy !req
117. What if my chute doesn't open
and I crater at 200 miles an hour?Copy !req
118. That's not going to be fun.
Come on. Don't be silly.Copy !req
119. That could never happen. Really?Copy !req
120. And you wouldn't crater,
you'd bounce. Bounce?Copy !req
121. So, you want to fool around
before or after we skydive?Copy !req
122. I don't want to sound like a
star-struck teenager or anything...Copy !req
123. but, God, I just love hearing you sing.Copy !req
124. You are like Frank Sinatra...Copy !req
125. and Bobby Darin all
rolled into one. Mime.Copy !req
126. Yeah, I don't know him. Does he
sing, too? No, I want to do mime.Copy !req
127. You're kidding. Mime has
always been my first love.Copy !req
128. But Big Willie hired you to sing.
No, Big Willie hired me to perform.Copy !req
129. It says so in the contract.
What I do is up to me.Copy !req
130. Come on, you can't give up singing now.Copy !req
131. Your career is just taking off.Copy !req
132. Just watch. I call this
one "Bublé in the Bubble."Copy !req
133. Okay, then, Michael?Copy !req
134. Michael.Copy !req
135. Mary, you don't have to yell.
Mimes can hear, they just can't talk.Copy !req
136. Yeah.Copy !req
137. So, let me get this straight.Copy !req
138. You want 1,000 of my lobster? Yes.Copy !req
139. You stole my boyfriend.
Yeah, but he had a little...Copy !req
140. At our engagement party.
He didn't tell me who he was.Copy !req
141. Sweetie, that guy was a jerk.Copy !req
142. So if you think about it, I actually
saved you years of pain and suffering.Copy !req
143. I mean, I think that you and I
could possibly be best girlfriends.Copy !req
144. Why would you even come to me?
Because of your incredible reputation.Copy !req
145. Everybody knows about you:
Wendy, freshest seafood in Vegas.Copy !req
146. And everyone in town already
said no. What are you talking about?Copy !req
147. You're my first choice.Copy !req
148. What's it worth to you?
How much do you charge...Copy !req
149. for a lobster dinner? $85.Copy !req
150. I'll take 1,000 lobster dinners
to go. I'll even round it out...Copy !req
151. to a cool $100,000. Cash or check?
Make it $200,000 and you got a deal.Copy !req
152. What's with the additional $100,000?Copy !req
153. Pain and suffering. Deal. Let
me see one of those bad boys.Copy !req
154. Wait. Where are his... Claws?Copy !req
155. Yeah. They're Pacific lobster. No claws.Copy !req
156. Enjoy the pain and suffering.Copy !req
157. Okay, sure. Hey. Hey.Copy !req
158. I need a favor. Favor? That's great.Copy !req
159. Last time you asked me for a favor,
it cost me $1,900 in parking tickets.Copy !req
160. You didn't want the police
to boot my beemer, did you?Copy !req
161. Your beemer.Copy !req
162. No, sweetheart, of course I didn't.Copy !req
163. Did you get some more tickets?
Yes, but we'll deal with that later.Copy !req
164. I need you to pull someone's
medical records.Copy !req
165. That's against the law. Only technically.Copy !req
166. No, there's also a privacy issue.
Details. I need Jay Ross' medical files.Copy !req
167. The pimply-faced boyfriend you
had in the ninth grade? That Jay Ross?Copy !req
168. He lost the pimples. Yeah.Copy !req
169. What's the matter with the kid? Cancer.Copy !req
170. So he says. Jeez, honey,
I'm sorry to hear that.Copy !req
171. Yeah, I was sorry, too, until I
realized he was probably lying.Copy !req
172. Why would somebody lie
about something like that?Copy !req
173. If I told you, you'd kill him
quicker than his cancer ever could.Copy !req
174. Delinda said you're the cheery
one. That was before my musical act...Copy !req
175. decided to become a mime.
Mimes are funny.Copy !req
176. Sort of. My life is over.Copy !req
177. Yeah, there's a lot of that going on.Copy !req
178. You know what you need?
A gun, to shoot myself?Copy !req
179. You need to karaoke.Copy !req
180. No, I don't need to sing.
I need my musical act to sing.Copy !req
181. No, you need to karaoke with me.Copy !req
182. Come on, I'm only asking
because I'm dying of cancer.Copy !req
183. Yeah, nice try, Jay. But
Delinda told me you'd say that.Copy !req
184. That's because Delinda
didn't believe me.Copy !req
185. It's true? Cross my heart, hope to die.Copy !req
186. Double down!Copy !req
187. So, Big Willie, how's
everything? Up $700,000.Copy !req
188. Nice.Copy !req
189. Sam, I do not like to be bothered when
I'm playing, especially when I'm winning.Copy !req
190. Of course not. I just wanted to let you
know that your daughter's wedding is set.Copy !req
191. The decorations, the flowers,
the pyrotechnics are amazing.Copy !req
192. Is Bublé here? He's here!Copy !req
193. I want Bublé! Yeah! So you got him!Copy !req
194. However, I am concerned a
little about your choice in food.Copy !req
195. Lobster...Copy !req
196. is fine, sir, but...Copy !req
197. I may have something that could
make your evening even more special.Copy !req
198. I just got the word
that I can get my hands on...Copy !req
199. 800 pounds of Kobe beef.Copy !req
200. Kobe beef?Copy !req
201. The $300-a-pound,
Japanese-raised Kobe beef.Copy !req
202. The kind that's massaged
daily by hand, perfectly marbled...Copy !req
203. served with just a touch of soy.Copy !req
204. Sir.Copy !req
205. I have to think about it. Okay,
well, you think about it. No pressure.Copy !req
206. I'll be waiting over here.Copy !req
207. Hey.Copy !req
208. Think he's gonna go for it?
2-to-1 against.Copy !req
209. I want... lobster!Copy !req
210. Okay.Copy !req
211. I want the jet.Copy !req
212. Hit me! Yeah!Copy !req
213. I'm gonna let you in on a little secret.Copy !req
214. Just when you think you got
everything under control...Copy !req
215. something will come along
and throw your plans for a loop.Copy !req
216. Don't I know it.Copy !req
217. Hey. I'm so sorry.Copy !req
218. I've got no right to complain,
you know, considering everything.Copy !req
219. You know, everyone told me
that once you know you're dying...Copy !req
220. you'll stop sweating the
small stuff. But they're wrong.Copy !req
221. No, it's the small stuff
that makes life worth living.Copy !req
222. So you're saying
I should enjoy my failure?Copy !req
223. No.Copy !req
224. But you shouldn't let it
stop you from singing.Copy !req
225. You're kidding.Copy !req
226. Karaoke in Vegas
with Venice as a backdrop.Copy !req
227. It's pretty cool, huh? How many
people get to say they did this?Copy !req
228. I think we'd be the first.
How did you do all this?Copy !req
229. I gave them a note from
my doctor. Jay, I don't sing.Copy !req
230. Karaoke is not about how good you
are, it's about how much fun you have.Copy !req
231. No, you don't understand, I can't
sing in front of all these people.Copy !req
232. It's easy. Just pretend we're 5,000
miles away, staring at the piazza.Copy !req
233. The one without the 5,000-room hotel.Copy !req
234. Okay, not a problem.
How is this going to help?Copy !req
235. You're never gonna see
these people again.Copy !req
236. Do you take requests? Of course.Copy !req
237. Make love to me.Copy !req
238. I'm sorry, but I'm wearing this.Copy !req
239. It's not a problem, as long as
you're not wearing anything else.Copy !req
240. Yup. That's right, 1,000 Maine lobster.Copy !req
241. I'll be there within the hour.Copy !req
242. Craig, you just told me an
hour ago that you had the lobster.Copy !req
243. I know, I'm sorry, Sam. My shipment didn't
come in, on account of Hurricane Ruth.Copy !req
244. It kicked up a wicked swell
as far north as Halifax.Copy !req
245. None of the lobster men will leave
dock. I don't think you understand...Copy !req
246. the desperate nature of my
situation. I understand the situation.Copy !req
247. I just don't have any lobster.
We're old friends, right?Copy !req
248. If you knew where to get
the lobster, you'd tell me.Copy !req
249. Sam. Yes.Copy !req
250. You dumped me. I was ready to propose.
No, I didn't think you were serious.Copy !req
251. I showed you the ring. I'll marry
you if you give me 1,000 lobsters.Copy !req
252. Very funny. No, I'm serious.
I'm madly in love with you.Copy !req
253. I can't live without you, let's
spend the rest of our lives together.Copy !req
254. This is a proposal? Abso-frigging-lutely.Copy !req
255. As long as I get you the lobster? Yes.Copy !req
256. Sam. Yes.Copy !req
257. Even if I thought you were
serious, I don't have any lobster.Copy !req
258. All right. No one does.Copy !req
259. You blew it again.Copy !req
260. How about dinner and a movie
for 500 pounds of Pacific salmon?Copy !req
261. Figures.Copy !req
262. If you want to go skydiving,
why don't you ask Danny?Copy !req
263. He's a Marine. They do that
Superman stuff in their sleep, right?Copy !req
264. Tell Nessa skydiving is
not that dangerous. It's not.Copy !req
265. Unless someone's shooting
at you. There you go.Copy !req
266. It's not the jumping I'm
afraid of. It's the landing.Copy !req
267. That's not a real healthy way to live.
It is if you want to live a long time.Copy !req
268. I pride myself on almost
rarely, if ever, trying to kill myself.Copy !req
269. You like to go swimming
in the ocean? Yeah.Copy !req
270. Did you know that the ocean is
home to the great white shark...Copy !req
271. one of the most violent,
bloodthirsty predators on the planet.Copy !req
272. And if you get bit by one,
besides the mind-blowing pain...Copy !req
273. your blood actually chums the
water which leads to a feeding frenzy...Copy !req
274. with a whole bunch of other sharks.Copy !req
275. Yeah, it's a long... Slow...Copy !req
276. Painful, painful death. That's great.Copy !req
277. I'm never going in the
ocean again. Anything else?Copy !req
278. No! All right.Copy !req
279. What's your point? My
point is life is all about risk.Copy !req
280. We could die at any moment. If it's your
time to go, you might as well go quick.Copy !req
281. And if you eat it skydiving,
you won't feel a thing.Copy !req
282. Mary? Yeah?Copy !req
283. Mary, hi. Excuse me. Hi.Copy !req
284. I hate to bother you and I
don't mean to seem ungrateful...Copy !req
285. but we have these passes, to the buffet...Copy !req
286. Yes, our cooking staff has marked
all vegan dishes with gold stars...Copy !req
287. and two soy entrées have been
prepared by Gunther, just for you.Copy !req
288. It's amazing. Larry, don't
you worry about a thing.Copy !req
289. The next couple of days, I
will take care of everything.Copy !req
290. We gotta make this quick,
Luis wants us out in 20 minutes.Copy !req
291. Not that I'm being picky, but isn't this
considered tampering with evidence?Copy !req
292. CSI didn't find anything,
so how can it hurt?Copy !req
293. I just don't want a felony
seafood conviction on my record.Copy !req
294. Come on.Copy !req
295. Why do we got close it?Copy !req
296. You gotta keep this thing a secret.Copy !req
297. I promised Ed
we wouldn't show anybody.Copy !req
298. A Radiant Spectrometer! I just read an
article about this in Theoretical Science.Copy !req
299. Yes. By lacing radioactive
isotopes into a laser matrix...Copy !req
300. it can retrieve material residue...Copy !req
301. from surface strata for up
to three days after contact...Copy !req
302. even if cleaned by
phosphate-based cleaners.Copy !req
303. So, we can dust for prints
that aren't there? Right.Copy !req
304. Why don't you just say that?Copy !req
305. The only downside is if you're
exposed to the radiation...Copy !req
306. your nads will glow green
for two months.Copy !req
307. Check this out.Copy !req
308. Now, I agree with you that mime...Copy !req
309. is poised to come back in a big way.Copy !req
310. I'm just not sure that you're
the guy to bring it back.Copy !req
311. Mary, lighten up. Yeah,
but it's a wedding reception.Copy !req
312. And people, they want to hear you sing.Copy !req
313. My voice is my instrument. Exactly.Copy !req
314. Maybe I should show how
versatile my instrument is.Copy !req
315. Now you're talking.Copy !req
316. You think I'm funny, right? For
a musician, you're pretty funny.Copy !req
317. Good. Then that's what I'll do. Stand-up.Copy !req
318. Just stand-up. Stand-up.Copy !req
319. Big Willie wants to hear you sing.Copy !req
320. I want to hear you sing.
Then buy one of my CDs.Copy !req
321. Okay, the lights dim, I take the stage.Copy !req
322. How many of you hate to fly?
I know I do.Copy !req
323. Mr. Nelson? Yeah. James
L. Nelson, at your service.Copy !req
324. You must be Samantha
Jane Marquez. Yes, I am.Copy !req
325. Talking to you on the phone,
I thought you'd be bigger.Copy !req
326. Sort of burly, you know?Copy !req
327. More facial hair. Right.Copy !req
328. I need some lobster.
Yeah. I know what you need.Copy !req
329. The only problem is I can't deliver
on account of Hurricane Ruth...Copy !req
330. And the wicked swell. Yeah, I
heard. Listen, money's no object.Copy !req
331. Okay.Copy !req
332. For $1 million...Copy !req
333. me and my buddies will go on out there.Copy !req
334. We'll pick you up some lobster.Copy !req
335. So $1,000 a lobster?
And worth every penny.Copy !req
336. Money's now an object. That's too bad.Copy !req
337. It was nice meeting you,
Ms. Marquez. Mr. Nelson?Copy !req
338. What if I were to give you something?Copy !req
339. Something that money can't buy.Copy !req
340. Something very valuable.Copy !req
341. Yeah!Copy !req
342. Pisser!Copy !req
343. I'm busy, and you're still full of crap.Copy !req
344. Look, I'm sorry you
don't believe me, but...Copy !req
345. I see a white light.Copy !req
346. Jackass!Copy !req
347. Come on!Copy !req
348. How's it going? Pretty good.Copy !req
349. Can't complain. Thanks.Copy !req
350. I gotta ask you, does that whole
"I'm dying of cancer" line really work?Copy !req
351. Like a charm.Copy !req
352. You okay? Absolutely wonderful.Copy !req
353. Michael Bublé now wants to be
a stand-up comic.Copy !req
354. And? And he's horrible.Copy !req
355. And you're happy because... I have
nothing to feed my wedding guests...Copy !req
356. and my musical act is
no longer musical...Copy !req
357. but I'm not sweating the small stuff.Copy !req
358. You were with Jay, weren't
you? Yeah. How'd you know?Copy !req
359. Daddy, I need you to kick Jay
out of the hotel.Copy !req
360. Right.Copy !req
361. Why don't you sit down for a
second? I don't want to sit down.Copy !req
362. Look, I just got a copy of Jay's
medical records from his doctor...Copy !req
363. so sit down for one second.
Daddy, I don't want to sit down.Copy !req
364. Stop with the "daddy" stuff and sit down.Copy !req
365. I'm sorry.Copy !req
366. But Jay is telling the truth.Copy !req
367. Sure he is. Remember when he reassembled
the principal's car on top of the gym?Copy !req
368. Are you sure you talked
to his doctor? I mean...Copy !req
369. Jay's dying, honey.Copy !req
370. Man, you look beat. Thank you.
I've just crossed the country...Copy !req
371. twice, and in 12 hours
I'm throwing a wedding.Copy !req
372. So, I figure I have about three
hours to eat, sleep, and shower...Copy !req
373. before I have to be back to work.Copy !req
374. I know what you need. What's that?Copy !req
375. You need to get laid.Copy !req
376. You must be Delinda's friend. Yes.Copy !req
377. Here's the thing, Jocko. Jay.Copy !req
378. Whatever. "Getting laid" can
only lead to "will you marry me?"Copy !req
379. Then I'm going to have to dump
you... Actually, I'm dying of cancer.Copy !req
380. Which means no long-term
commitment, no emotional aftermath...Copy !req
381. and no one's ever going to know
because "Dead men tell no tales."Copy !req
382. So, you're the perfect
one-night stand. Exactly.Copy !req
383. Almost done. Nothing.Copy !req
384. I'll run it again, but...Copy !req
385. I compared our footprint with every
major shoe manufacturer in the world.Copy !req
386. Not a single match.Copy !req
387. Either this guy's a real pro...Copy !req
388. Or the luckiest son of a bitch in history.Copy !req
389. You were right. That
was exactly what I needed.Copy !req
390. Is there any chance we could cuddle?Copy !req
391. Don't ruin the moment.Copy !req
392. I don't know about you,
but my brain is fried.Copy !req
393. Yeah. After two days
in the surveillance room,Copy !req
394. it's nice to...Copy !req
395. be outside. Getting in
touch with the real world.Copy !req
396. Nothing more real thanCopy !req
397. a chlorinated ocean with
a concrete bottom.Copy !req
398. No natural predators. Completely safe.Copy !req
399. No natural predators, completely safe.Copy !req
400. I've been talking to
some doctors at UNLVCopy !req
401. about experimental treatments...Copy !req
402. gene therapy. They want to set upCopy !req
403. an appointment for tomorrow afternoon...Copy !req
404. for some additional tests. Don't
you think Jay's been through all this?Copy !req
405. Jay will be fine.Copy !req
406. I'll make sure of it.Copy !req
407. Maybe I should call his doctor
in Houston again?Copy !req
408. You know, there were
lots of times when...Copy !req
409. we just didn't think
we'd ever make it home.Copy !req
410. And no matter what we did,
we were not going to make it.Copy !req
411. This is different. No.Copy !req
412. No, it's not. Not really, because
when you reach that point...Copy !req
413. you know, you can fight...Copy !req
414. you can cry, you can pray.Copy !req
415. But ultimately, you have
to accept what happens.Copy !req
416. Yeah, but he's not fighting.
He's on vacation.Copy !req
417. We all fight in different ways, you know?Copy !req
418. So you're telling me just to
give up? No, I didn't say that.Copy !req
419. I didn't say that at all. I'm saying...Copy !req
420. you...Copy !req
421. say your goodbyes,
and you make your peace.Copy !req
422. How about you? Did you
ever have to make your peace?Copy !req
423. I just, you know... I didn't have to.Copy !req
424. I had something a lot stronger.Copy !req
425. I had this little girl
back home who needed me.Copy !req
426. Just made me feel like I was bulletproof.Copy !req
427. I love you.Copy !req
428. You want to sit with me for a
little while? We can talk about it?Copy !req
429. No?Copy !req
430. You're a mess.Copy !req
431. I know.Copy !req
432. Ed? Yo.Copy !req
433. We checked the shoe tread with
every shoe manufacturer in the database.Copy !req
434. But we never checked the print
against specialty lines.Copy !req
435. Specialty? Vegan shoes?Copy !req
436. I'll order you a pair if you're interested.Copy !req
437. No. I don't believe in
walking on vegetables.Copy !req
438. Got a match. Where are
these veg-heads now?Copy !req
439. They're meeting in Bella Sera.Copy !req
440. Yo, Larry?Copy !req
441. Where are my lobsters?Copy !req
442. What are those for?Copy !req
443. Pain pills. I'd offer you one,
but in two minutes...Copy !req
444. you'd be passed out and your head
would be in a puddle of your own drool.Copy !req
445. Look, I want to apologize. For what?Copy !req
446. For not listening, not
believing. Happens all the time.Copy !req
447. I have to admit, it's the most
original come-on line I've ever heard.Copy !req
448. You'd be surprised how well it works.Copy !req
449. Come on.Copy !req
450. Why didn't you stay in the hospital?Copy !req
451. My body "failed to respond to any
accepted therapeutic modalities."Copy !req
452. And they could only promise me a
few extra weeks than I already had.Copy !req
453. So where are you going to
go after Vegas? I don't know.Copy !req
454. Vegas was the end of my to-do list.Copy !req
455. The last time the doctors checked,Copy !req
456. the cancer was pretty much everywhere.Copy !req
457. I guess that's kind of weird, actually.Copy !req
458. I mean, outside I look okay, but on
the inside, I'm pretty much a mess.Copy !req
459. You're going to go back
into the hospital? No.Copy !req
460. I don't want to spend my last
few days on a hospital bed...Copy !req
461. with a tube down my throat,
all pumped up on morphine.Copy !req
462. Part of how you live is how you die,Copy !req
463. and that's definitely not for me.Copy !req
464. Besides, I still have two
unfinished items on my list...Copy !req
465. and one of them is skydiving.Copy !req
466. I have compared every woman
I've ever met to you.Copy !req
467. Jay, we were in the ninth
grade. You were my first love.Copy !req
468. I'll think about it.Copy !req
469. You better think quick.
It's a limited-time offer.Copy !req
470. Jay... Dee...Copy !req
471. you're my dying wish.Copy !req
472. You're in a lot of trouble, Larry.
Felony robbery. Grand theft, auto...Copy !req
473. well, technically grand theft truck.Copy !req
474. I can't tell you where they are.Copy !req
475. Even if you put them on ice,
they're not going to last much longer.Copy !req
476. They'll be fine. Why'd you do it?Copy !req
477. Why? Yeah.Copy !req
478. Las Vegas is like the Killing Fields.Copy !req
479. 200,000 new people a day...Copy !req
480. satisfying their bloodlust...Copy !req
481. by gnawing on the flesh of
fried, and baked, and broiled...Copy !req
482. and grilled animals. And does
anyone even blink an eye? No.Copy !req
483. Instead, they pay homage to...Copy !req
484. Vegas' Murderer's Row:
Emeril, Wolfgang Puck, Gunther...Copy !req
485. and Bobby Flay.Copy !req
486. When I got word that the
Montecito was going to put to death...Copy !req
487. 1,000 lobster
right under my nose, I knew...Copy !req
488. that it was a call to action.Copy !req
489. Have you ever heard a
lobster scream? Personally, no.Copy !req
490. But I have dipped their tails in
warm butter. And it's quite tasty.Copy !req
491. Murderer.Copy !req
492. Where are my lobsters,
Larry? I can't tell you.Copy !req
493. You know, Larry, where
you're going, I have a feeling...Copy !req
494. that they're gonna make
a meat-eater out of you.Copy !req
495. I'll see you later guys.Copy !req
496. They're safe. That's all that matters.Copy !req
497. Yeah, I know his list:
Singing, skydiving, sunrise.Copy !req
498. Jay thought I might be able to
help him with another one.Copy !req
499. That's good. Tying up loose
ends is an important part of dying.Copy !req
500. Yeah.Copy !req
501. It's this particular loose end
that has me a little concerned.Copy !req
502. He's didn't ask you to
do anything illegal, did he?Copy !req
503. No, of course not. Good.Copy !req
504. Because that's where I would
draw the line. Any other lines?Copy !req
505. He asked you
to sleep with him, didn't he?Copy !req
506. He's been in love with me since
the ninth grade. I'm his dying wish.Copy !req
507. How'd you know?Copy !req
508. Apparently, he's got
a lot of dying wishes...Copy !req
509. because he also asked me...Copy !req
510. and Sam...Copy !req
511. and Nessa to sleep with him, too.Copy !req
512. You're leaving? I'm going skydiving.Copy !req
513. So, have you made your decision?Copy !req
514. I've given it a lot of thought.
And the answer is no.Copy !req
515. But don't you want to
know why? Not particularly.Copy !req
516. You keep telling me
how much you love me,Copy !req
517. how much you want to sleep with me.Copy !req
518. I do. But you never once asked me...Copy !req
519. how I felt about you.Copy !req
520. You were my best friend. Friends
do anything for each other, right?Copy !req
521. Yeah, but don't you think a going-away
lay would change what we had?Copy !req
522. And cheapen it?Copy !req
523. I don't want to get laid.Copy !req
524. I want to make love to the most
beautiful woman in the world.Copy !req
525. Is that what you said
to Sam, Mary, and Nessa?Copy !req
526. I don't know, these painkillers
really do a number on my head.Copy !req
527. Oh, God. Oh, God!Copy !req
528. All right.Copy !req
529. Come on. Just hear me out.Copy !req
530. I'm dying, and I'm desperate.Copy !req
531. Want to do everything while I'm still alive.Copy !req
532. I just don't want to die with any regrets.Copy !req
533. I'm sorry. I'm sorry, too.Copy !req
534. Delinda, I...Copy !req
535. We could always talk.Copy !req
536. And I think that's really why I came here.Copy !req
537. I just wanted someone to talk to...Copy !req
538. like we did when we were kids.Copy !req
539. If this is just another line
of... Delinda, I'm scared.Copy !req
540. You're not going to break
my nose again, are you?Copy !req
541. My first kiss, and my last.Copy !req
542. Sam! Come quick.
The wedding was perfect.Copy !req
543. And the lobster? Delicious. So fresh.Copy !req
544. Oh, good. You have no idea.Copy !req
545. Hit me!Copy !req
546. What's Big Willie's chip count? Down
$600,000 and not a care in the world.Copy !req
547. Really? How do you do it?Copy !req
548. We have some new VIPs.Copy !req
549. And here they are: Eight of my
most favorite lobster fishermenCopy !req
550. from Harpswell, Maine.Copy !req
551. And all you had to do is comp their stay?Copy !req
552. That's not all I had to do. You didn't.Copy !req
553. We're gonna hear Michael Bublé sing.Copy !req
554. Bublé! Bublé!Copy !req
555. They're fans. Go figure.Copy !req
556. Whatever happened to the...
I have no idea.Copy !req
557. Larry...Copy !req
558. this is Mr. Glenn Schaeffer.Copy !req
559. He's CEO of the Mandalay Group.Copy !req
560. He owns this hotel.
And these are my sharks.Copy !req
561. It seems that somebody dumped...Copy !req
562. 1,000 lobsters into his
million-gallon aquarium.Copy !req
563. Are they okay? It's not a
matter of the lobsters being okay.Copy !req
564. I can't afford to have my sharks die.Copy !req
565. You see, Larry, everything
that goes into this tank...Copy !req
566. including the food, is screened
for bacteria and disease.Copy !req
567. So, what you did here was
endanger Mr. Schaeffer's sharks.Copy !req
568. I didn't know that they were... It's okay.Copy !req
569. We came up with a pretty
great idea, I think. More my idea.Copy !req
570. Okay, Glenn, it was your idea.Copy !req
571. "The Mandalay Bay and the
Montecito Resort bring you..."Copy !req
572. "Lobsterfest, all you can eat."Copy !req
573. Mikey! Hey, Ed, you ready for the show?Copy !req
574. I'm ready. Sure, I'm ready.
How about you? You ready?Copy !req
575. I'm ready. Of course, yeah.Copy !req
576. Listen, how did it go with
her? Did it work out or what?Copy !req
577. Oh, man. You were right. She
is the nicest person on the planet.Copy !req
578. She didn't say no to anything.
The plate. Did you... The plate?Copy !req
579. Eight of them. I did the
mime. The "Bublé in a Bubble."Copy !req
580. She just laughed at me from
the audience. Pay up, sucker.Copy !req
581. There you go. This was all a bet?Copy !req
582. Yeah, but no.Copy !req
583. Listen, we talk a lot,
you know, we talk a lot.Copy !req
584. And this one time I was telling
him I know the coolest, coolest girl.Copy !req
585. And he doubted that, because that's
the way he is. And so we made a bet.Copy !req
586. I said, "I'll bet there's nothing you
could do that would make this girl..."Copy !req
587. "lose her temper." And there you go.
I hope it's okay. I signed it to Jillian.Copy !req
588. Sure. She listens to this thing
every day for three months.Copy !req
589. I know the whole act.Copy !req
590. How're you? Good.Copy !req
591. Can't wait to see you
after the show. Good luck.Copy !req
592. I believe that is my cue.Copy !req
593. He's a great kid. All this for a CD?Copy !req
594. No, he also promised to come back
next summer during his national tour.Copy !req
595. This kid's gonna be huge.
What if you'd lost?Copy !req
596. Would have given him one of my CDs.Copy !req
597. Nessa! If your chute doesn't open...Copy !req
598. hold up your left hand! Why?Copy !req
599. In case anybody on the ground
wants your watch.Copy !req
600. Oh, ha-ha.Copy !req
601. Time to go. Ready.Copy !req
602. Hey!Copy !req
603. Thanks for everything.Copy !req
604. It's been one hell of a trip.Copy !req
605. No!Copy !req
606. Jay!Copy !req
607. Look, sweetie, he did
everything he wanted to do.Copy !req
608. Apparently everyone he wanted to do.Copy !req
609. You didn't? Me? No.Copy !req
610. You? No. Of course not. Mary?Copy !req
611. He's hot and he's dying.
Of course I did him.Copy !req
612. I guess he went out in style.Copy !req
613. How was it? Fine.Copy !req
614. I can't believe he jumped.Copy !req
615. I bet he smiled the whole way down.Copy !req
616. I'm guessing there was a point
where he had to quit smiling.Copy !req
617. Dad! I'm sorry. I couldn't...Copy !req
618. It's not funny. I'm sorry.Copy !req