1. Yep.
Copy !req
2. Yup.
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3. What the...?
Hey, man, don't...
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4. Don't sting me!
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5. Dale, what the heck
are you doing with bees?
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6. Some guy
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7. hired me to clear them
out of his attic.
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8. I was gonna kill 'em,
but how could I?
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9. Just look at 'em.
Aren't they adorable?
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10. I guess they are
kind of cute.
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11. And they're entrepreneurs.
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12. These babies make honey.
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13. And honey is money,
my friend.
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14. What do you know
about beekeeping?
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15. I know how to keep them
from crawling up my nose.
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16. Phnyeah.
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17. The Clones are coming,
Master Joseph.
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18. We must reach
Jedi Council.
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19. Oh, no, the landing bay
door is closing!
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20. Oh, uh, use the Force
to roll under the door.
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21. Easy now, fellas.
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22. Nothing.
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23. Dang it, Bobby.
You bent the track.
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24. You fix bent stuff
all the time, though, right?
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25. I can't fix this,
I have to get a new one.
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26. Which means I'll have to file
an insurance claim.
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27. Really?
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28. So anytime you break something,
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29. insurance gets you a new one?
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30. Hey, if you back the car
into my bike,
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31. we can get a new car
and a new bike.
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32. No, Bobby, it doesn't
work that way.
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33. Insurance
is a safety net
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34. woven from the trust
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35. between the policy holder
and the guarantor.
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36. Insurance only covers accidents.
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37. Accident.
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38. Got ya.
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39. On our way to
the outlets tomorrow,
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40. I was thinking, Luanne and
I could stop for lunch
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41. at the Shoney's
off Exit-25.
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42. What, you don't
like that one?
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43. No, it's a good Shoney's.
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44. I'm just so frustrated
with Bobby.
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45. He thinks insurance
is some magic fairy
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46. who just waves her wand
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47. and makes teenage
jack-assery disappear.
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48. Her wand?
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49. Huh, I always think
of insurance as a boy.
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50. Welcome to the Gribble
Honey Bucket.
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51. You are about to witness
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52. how Mother Nature
turns a profit.
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53. Gentlemen,
don your helmets.
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54. I'm on my way.
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55. I've struck gold.
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56. Yummy, sticky gold.
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57. Okay, Dad, the
ladies are finally
out of our hair.
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58. What's first, a matinee
or putt-putt golf?
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59. I thought we'd have a talk
about responsibility.
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60. Oh.
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61. Now, since you were
horsing around
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62. and broke the garage door,
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63. you're going to have
to take care of it.
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64. Wait, you said insurance
was taking care of it.
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65. The claim settlement
won't just come down the chimney
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66. like Santa Claus.
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67. Someone has to make the calls
and file the papers.
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68. That's me, right?
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69. I want you to know
our policy inside and out
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70. before you call Mitch Watson
down at the insurance agency.
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71. Don't waste his time,
he'll hang up on you.
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72. How much are you gonna charge
for your honey, Dale?
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73. These people pay
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74. five dollars for a carton
of filthy mushrooms,
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75. so what do you think,
$100? $150?
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76. So where do you want me?
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77. Gone.
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78. The ladies with their trendy
scarves and fancy coffees
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79. won't come near this place
with you hanging around.
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80. You're absolutely right.
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81. Come and get your freshly
secreted honey!
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82. Don't be put off by
Irwin Allen's The Swarm
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83. or the tedious Peter Fonda film
Ulee's Gold.
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84. Look, Alison, bees.
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85. I heard Jenna Elfman on
Access Hollywood talking about
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86. how you can cure anything
with the venom from bee stings.
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87. Bee stings?
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88. Yeah, bee stings?
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89. My nutritionist says
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90. it stimulates your body's
natural healing response.
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91. A friend of mine used it
during childbirth
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92. instead of an epidural.
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93. How many stings
do I get for $150?
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94. Uh, mm, um, well,
the going rate is, uh... 12?
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95. That's a really
good deal.
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96. Mm-hmm, it really is.
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97. Oh, okay.
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98. Okay, so, do you want
to get up on the table?
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99. Or would you rather
have me shake it up
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100. and dump some out on you?
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101. I'm still hungry.
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102. You wanna do another lap?
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103. Interest you fellas
in a fried banana?
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104. You can fry a banana?
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105. But it's fruit.
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106. Here, just try one.
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107. Oh, this banana's
delicious.
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108. The monkeys
must never find out.
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109. Okay,
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110. last question.
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111. Our policy is an HO-A Plus.
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112. What does it cover?
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113. All major perils
except sinkhole,
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114. nuclear accident and war.
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115. I think you're ready
for Mitch.
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116. I'll listen in.
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117. If Mitch asks, tell him
this call is being monitored
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118. for quality assurance.
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119. Hello, this is
Plainsman Insurance.
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120. This call may be monitored
for quality assurance.
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121. Good afternoon.
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122. My name is Robert Hill,
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123. policy number G-75-658.
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124. May I please
speak to Mitch?
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125. Mitch is not here.
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126. Okay, then. Thanks.
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127. Uh, this is Hank Hill,
policy holder.
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128. When will Mitch be back?
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129. Uh, he is in the 'loo.
Bathroom. Bathroom.
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130. And according to our records,
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131. your policy has been canceled
for non-payment.
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132. Canceled?
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133. Listen here, I have never
missed a payment.
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134. I'm coming down there right now
so I can straighten this out.
Copy !req
135. Tell Mitch
I'm on my way.
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136. Plainsman's
customer service operations
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137. have been moved
to a central call center
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138. so we may serve you
more efficiently.
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139. I'll be happy to help you.
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140. Just give me
your new address.
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141. And remember, we're all
being monitored here.
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142. Actually, Mr. Hill,
uh, we are in Bangalore, India.
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143. India? No wonder you guys
lost my payment.
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144. I demand to speak
to your supervisor.
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145. Please hold.
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146. Bobby, grab my checkbook.
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147. I'm gonna kick this guy's ass
over the phone.
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148. Hello, am I speaking
to the gentleman
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149. with the delinquent account?
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150. No, listen,
there's been a mistake.
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151. I sent you my payment on...
on, uh...
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152. Bwah!
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153. I'm sorry,
could you repeat that?
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154. Dad, if we go to India
to straighten this out,
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155. can I ride an elephant?
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156. Just, just give me
a second.
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157. Bobby, sit down.
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158. All right,
here's where we're at.
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159. I made a big...
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160. big mistake.
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161. We've got no insurance.
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162. Okay.
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163. Bobby, don't you realize
how important this is?
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164. All our policies
have lapsed.
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165. Our house, everything
in it, our vehicles...
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166. Nothing is protected.
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167. The safety net's gone... gone.
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168. I hear the words
you're saying.
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169. And I believe you believe
it's important...
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170. Dang it, don't you get it?
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171. We've...
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172. Okay, okay...
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173. Nothing good happens
when a homeowner panics.
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174. Now, we need a plan.
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175. I'll overnight a check
to Plainsman.
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176. That way, we'll be covered again
as of Monday morning.
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177. But we've still got to make it
through the next 36 hours.
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178. Hey, we could go to Six Flags
and get a two-day pass.
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179. Ooh, I think
they call it a Twicket.
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180. No. We have to stay home
and keep an eye on the house.
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181. Here's what we're going to do:
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182. I'll inspect and secure
the house's vital systems
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183. starting with the plumbing,
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184. while you test
all the smoke alarms.
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185. All right.
Just let me make some toast.
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186. No toast.
Not until I check
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187. the circuitry.
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188. Now, I'd better call
your mother
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189. and tell her to stay put.
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190. While I'm gone,
don't cook anything,
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191. flush anything
or turn anything on.
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192. Not insured?
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193. That's terrible.
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194. No, you're right,
we can't risk it.
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195. Okay, we won't drive.
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196. Are you serious?
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197. I promise we won't drive.
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198. Well, Luanne, it turns out
we are uninsured,
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199. so your Uncle Hank
wants us to stay here
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200. until everything's
straightened out.
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201. But I don't want
to stay here.
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202. Oh, what if we just
drive home
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203. really, really, really,
really fast?
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204. That way we won't be
on the road as long.
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205. No, Luanne.
If something happened,
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206. we couldn't afford another car.
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207. So we'll just stay here
and make the best of it.
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208. We just have to be creative.
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209. From now on,
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210. let's talk like this!
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211. It's true.
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212. Bee venom is the penicillin
of the 21st century.
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213. It cures everything
from toothaches to ADD.
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214. Isn't that right, young Joseph?
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215. Uh, my head hurt,
but now it doesn't.
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216. Step right up and tell me
what ails you.
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217. My neck's kind of stiff.
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218. Eight bee stings.
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219. You?
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220. I feel fine.
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221. Six bee stings.
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222. You?
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223. Planter's wart.
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224. Ew! 13 bee stings.
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225. How come Mom's not allowed
to come home?
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226. Weren't you
listening, Bobby?
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227. This is serious.
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228. We've all got
to do our part
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229. to get through
this weekend.
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230. Have you checked the smoke
alarm in the hallway?
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231. No, but it's just a hallway.
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232. There's nothing there
to catch on fire.
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233. A hallway is the
expressway flames use
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234. to spread to the rest
of the house.
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235. Maybe that's just something
the guy at Mega-Lo-Mart
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236. told you so you'd buy
more smoke detectors?
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237. Dang it, Bobby, this isn't
about some sales pitch.
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238. Fire can burn down
a house like that,
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239. and our equity's gone.
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240. 15 years of house payments
for nothing,
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241. because without insurance
we couldn't afford to rebuild.
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242. Huh?
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243. We'd have to set up a tent
on the ashes
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244. of what used to be this house.
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245. A tent?
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246. Where would I put
all my clothes in a tent?
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247. Oh, your clothes
would be gone, Bobby.
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248. You'd have to wear
the clothes
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249. that Reverend Stroup
collects
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250. for poor people
at the church.
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251. Toughskins?
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252. Yep. And it's not
just fire,
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253. it's tornadoes,
lightning,
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254. golf ball-sized hail
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255. that can destroy
everything we've got.
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256. Now, why don't you go
and check the strapping
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257. on the water heater.
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258. Texas hasn't had a major
earthquake in 165 years.
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259. We're due.
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260. It's so much better
frying at home.
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261. I can eat fried bananas
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262. while looking
at Hank's house.
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263. Really?
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264. Fry a candy bar?
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265. That's crazy. Okay!
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266. Take it out! Take it out!
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267. Ooh!
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268. Hot. Hot.
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269. So good. Burning!
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270. Oh! Chocolate... choc...
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271. Mmm...
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272. If we can fry a candy bar,
we can fry anything!
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273. Isn't it a beautiful
night, Aunt Peggy?
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274. Luanne, just stop it!
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275. Well, I'm getting hungry,
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276. and unless you want
to go hunt a squirrel,
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277. I guess we are eating
at the vending machine.
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278. I only have 20s.
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279. Do you have anything smaller?
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280. I only have n-nothing.
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281. Yeah, I got this box of
bees for Dale Gribble,
but no one's home.
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282. Mind if I leave
it with you?
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283. Dad? Situation
at the front door.
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284. Coming!
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285. Can I help you?
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286. Yeah, your neighbor,
he bought these ten
pounds of bees from me.
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287. I was gonna leave it there,
but ain't no one home,
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288. so I was hoping I could
leave it over here.
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289. Mind I leave it here?
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290. Y-You're gonna
have to go.
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291. This, too.
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292. Okay, good job
calling me, Bobby,
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293. but the next time,
don't even open the door.
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294. It's our last
line of defense.
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295. I know the mat says
"Welcome," but...
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296. Actually, I better
pick that up.
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297. If everybody fried their food,
there would be no war.
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298. Mm-hmm.
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299. What shall we try next,
Boomhauer?
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300. Tell you what, man,
talkin' 'bout
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301. dang ol' fried
fried chicken, man.
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302. Fried chicken refried?
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303. Damn.
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304. So hot and good.
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305. I wonder if more heat
would make it more good?
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306. Tell you what, man,
talkin' 'bout, dang 'ol
mo' hotter, mo' better, man.
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307. Whatcha doing?
Frying.
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308. My favorite arm!
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309. It looks pretty
bad, Dale.
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310. Do you need to go
to the doctor?
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311. One doctor? I'm gonna go
to about 2,000 buzzing ones.
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312. Stop it, stomach!
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313. You're scaring me!
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314. Aunt Peggy, did
you find change?
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315. No. But it's been 18 hours,
and we need to eat.
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316. Now, pick up the back end
of this branch.
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317. We're going in.
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318. Three, two, one.
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319. Soup's on...!
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320. Yes!
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321. We buried the needle, Boomhauer!
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322. We're frying where no man
has fried before!
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323. A cold beer is going
to taste so good
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324. with this scalding hot fish.
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325. Oops!
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326. Oh!
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327. Ooh...
Ooh...
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328. I want insurance!
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329. How's your shoulder?
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330. I could use a Coke.
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331. Root beer?
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332. One more sting and my treatment
will be complete.
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333. And...
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334. cured.
Copy !req
335. Okay, Joseph, take that stick
and poke me
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336. in my once-again robust arm.
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337. See, I don't feel a thing.
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338. Wait a minute.
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339. I don't feel a thing!
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340. Your venom did nothing!
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341. You betrayed me!
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342. Well, you may have destroyed
my arm,
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343. but my legs are still feeble
yet functional!
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344. Oh.
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345. Bobby, open the door!
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346. The bees are coming!
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347. Dad! Situation!
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348. Bobby, quick!
Help me!
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349. Sorry, Mr. Gribble!
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350. You're a potential
property hazard!
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351. Come back Monday!
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352. Open up!
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353. Bobby, why the heck's
the radio so loud?
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354. Mr. Gribble ran over,
screaming for help!
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355. For the love of God, Bobby,
have mercy!
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356. Oh, God!
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357. Bobby, why didn't you help him?
Copy !req
358. Why didn't you call 911?
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359. I was securing the perimeter!
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360. Yeah, I'd like to report
a man being chased
Copy !req
361. by a swarm of bees.
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362. I see.
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363. The emergency vehicles
are all tied up.
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364. Good. The last thing we need
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365. are fire trucks and ambulances
racing over here.
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366. They'd probably take
that corner too fast
Copy !req
367. and bam, right
in the living room.
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368. Come on. Dale's in trouble.
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369. We need to go out there.
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370. Out there? With the bees
and the hail and the A-bombs?
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371. Bobby, I think you're getting
a little carried away.
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372. And I guess I pushed you there.
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373. I didn't mean
to scare you, son.
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374. Sure, I wish
we had insurance.
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375. Because there is a chance
something bad could happen
Copy !req
376. to the house
if we leave it.
Copy !req
377. But something bad
is definitely gonna happen
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378. to Dale if we don' t.
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379. If we go outside,
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380. are you sure
everything
will be okay?
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381. There's nothing out there
we can't handle.
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382. I promise.
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383. Okay, Dad.
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384. Good Lord.
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385. Where are you going,
Bobby?
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386. This is not a big deal.
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387. It's just a little fire.
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388. And more bees
than I remembered.
Copy !req
389. Hey, Dale!
Run to your van!
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390. There, no problem.
Copy !req
391. Now, Dale's arm
looked pretty bad,
Copy !req
392. so we should make
sure he's okay.
Copy !req
393. Fire!
Copy !req
394. Good eye, Bobby.
Copy !req
395. We can easily put that out
with some potting soil.
Copy !req
396. Heh, did you ever think
you'd see a fire in the alley?
Copy !req
397. Kind of funny when you think
about it, isn't it?
Copy !req
398. Yeah, funny.
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399. Dang ol', man!
Copy !req
400. Mr. Dauterive's on fire!
Copy !req
401. That'll happen.
Copy !req
402. Roll, Bill, roll!
Copy !req
403. Just flaming potatoes,
Bobby.
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404. Why don't we put
those out?
Copy !req
405. Joseph, I'm having
some sort of reaction.
Copy !req
406. But I'm only allergic
to shellfish and...
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407. bees.
Copy !req
408. Joseph, I...
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409. Huh. You never
were here, were you?
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410. This could be bad.
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411. Mouth is so dry.
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412. Hank, I don't feel so good.
Copy !req
413. That's why we're gonna take you
to the hospital.
Copy !req
414. Come on. Let's go.
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415. Boomhauer, Bill's flared up
again!
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416. Kick some dirt on him!
Copy !req
417. Dang 'ol, man,
I dang 'ol got it, man.
Copy !req
418. Stupid bees.
Copy !req
419. Look at that big purple one
trying to get in.
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420. Okay, let's get you
to the hospital.
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421. That wasn't so bad.
Copy !req
422. But I'll feel a lot better
when our coverage kicks in.
Copy !req
423. Yep, you're going
to make a great
homeowner someday.
Copy !req
424. Hey, how'd you like
to help adjust
Copy !req
425. the deductible
on our umbrella policy?
Copy !req
426. Would I!
Copy !req
427. We'll call India
in the morning.
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428. The Hills are away
from the phone.
Copy !req
429. Please leave a message
and we'll get back to you.
Copy !req
430. Hank, it's me.
Copy !req
431. Please tell us we have insurance
so Luanne and I can come home.
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432. I am so sick
of eating junk food.
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433. Oh, oh good,
the police are here.
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434. Uh-oh. Oh, no. No!
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435. No, Officer,
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436. the vending machine was on
its side when we found it!
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437. The monkeys
must never find out.
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