1. Connie, are you still binging Hormonia?
Copy !req
2. Nah. Too much dong for me.
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3. Counterpoint.
There should be more dongs
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4. to make up for the decades
of titties on TV.
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5. I kinda think it's just like
the perfect amount of dong.
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6. These shows are so unrealistic.
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7. People our age
just have sex or don't.
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8. We aren't obsessed about it.
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9. Who wants to help me get laid
in Mexico this weekend?
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10. What's in Mexico?
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11. A few of the crew guys
told me about this sick deal
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12. for an all-inclusive vacation package.
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13. Ola, do you want to go with me?
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14. No thanks, Joseph.
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15. That would be a pretty intense
first date.
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16. Oh, we could smash first.
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17. If that'd make you
more comfortable.
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18. You know... it wouldn't.
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19. Had to ask.
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20. Guess it's me and you, Bobby.
You could be my wingman.
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21. Sounds fun, but I was gonna
hang out with Connie this weekend.
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22. I have to finish
that thermo project, remember?
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23. I know.
I like watchin' you solder.
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24. She did it in her pajamas last night.
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25. What?
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26. I like watchin' too.
She know what she doin'.
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27. Bobby, go.
You never take any time off.
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28. That's because with you,
every day is a vacation.
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29. Go to Mexico, please.
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30. Alright!
Guys trip to Mexico.
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31. It's gonna be rad!
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32. I'll ditch him
if you change your mind.
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33. Even if we're already by the border,
I'll turn around.
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34. Why'd you wait
till the day before your trip
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35. to look for your passport?
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36. I've been busy, Dad!
We ran a promotion last month.
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37. Do you know how many people
"bought one to get one"?
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38. Oh, Lord, there it is. Whew.
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39. Those earrings came with the dance moves.
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40. Thank God you grew out
of that South Korean pop phase.
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41. You know, I have a lockbox
in the bedroom
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42. where I keep
important documents like my passport
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43. and propane safety certification.
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44. You should get one
for your bedroom, too.
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45. Yeah, I'll get around to it.
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46. You're always "getting around" to things.
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47. Did you ever get around
to changing your brake pads?
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48. Oh, wait.
No, I did that for you too.
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49. If it wasn't for me,
you'd be rear-ending half of Dallas.
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50. Here, this is a checklist of things
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51. I always do
before a trip to Mexico.
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52. You got Mexican car insurance, right?
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53. I already have my own car insurance.
Yours.
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54. No, you're required by law
to have Mexican car insurance
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55. as soon as you cross the border.
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56. I'll get around to—
I mean, I will do it now.
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57. - Dad.
- Yes?
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58. How do I get Mexican car insurance?
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59. Dammit.
Okay, fine.
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60. I'll take care of the insurance for ya.
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61. If you want to.
It's not a big deal. Bye.
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62. I'm the only reason
this whole family isn't dead.
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63. Mexican car insurance.
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64. Agent. Agent!
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65. Let me speak to a gotdang
human being!
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66. I guess I could wait a little longer.
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67. Dude!
There's a water slide
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68. with a tequila bar at the top
and the bottom.
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69. Good choice on the hotel.
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70. What do you mean,
we don't have a reservation?
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71. Sorry, Señor Gribble.
You don't.
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72. Crap, okay, uh...
try my alias,
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73. Wellington Foulfellow.
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74. That doesn't show up.
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75. Oh, this is so weird.
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76. I remember filling out
the reservation page and everything.
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77. Here it is. See?
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78. Dammit, Joseph,
you didn't hit confirm.
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79. - Lo siento.
- Dammit!
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80. We're entirely booked up,
you know, with NurseCon in town.
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81. What... the... is NurseCon?
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82. Nurses from all over the world
come into town
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83. for professional development seminars.
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84. But between you and me,
it is just an excuse for them
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85. to let loose and make very bad decisions.
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86. Twerking contest starts in 10 minutes!
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87. We need two volunteer judges.
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88. Hotel guests only.
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89. - Dammit!
- Oh no.
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90. Bobby!
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91. This is Señora Camila.
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92. Joseph, you gotta be...
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93. Miss, hello.
I don't know what he—
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94. Señor Foulfellow
told me what happened.
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95. Camila and her sister
own a bed and breakfast
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96. and they just had a cancellation.
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97. - Our trip is saved.
- Yes.
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98. And it's up in the mountains,
so you can just follow my car to there.
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99. Dude, dude, dude, I don't know
about following a stranger to—
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100. Me and my sister
cook all the meals too.
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101. And today, we are making tuétano.
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102. Tuétano?
Isn't that—
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103. Roasted bone marrow.
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104. Meat butter from the gods.
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105. I— I mean, I guess
it couldn't hurt to check it out.
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106. But Joe, I'm not getting out of the car
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107. until I get eyes on that marrow.
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108. Do you want a snack?
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109. Bobby showed me his recipe
for teriyaki edamame.
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110. Edamame is Japanese
for soybeans.
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111. I'm not sure what it means in English.
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112. Hank Hill.
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113. Uh, slow down.
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114. Policía?
Uh, hold on, please.
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115. It's the Mexican police.
I think Bobby's in trouble.
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116. Hold on, my wife knows Spanish.
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117. - Hola. Me llamo Peggy Hill.
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118. Es un emergencia! Fue un accidente!
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119. Mm-mm, wrong number.
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120. - Hasta luego!
- No!
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121. Listen, your son
was in a car accident.
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122. - Oh, no!
- Oh, God. Is he injured?
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123. He is not hurt,
but he is at fault.
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124. He's being detained here
at the station.
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125. - Can we speak to him?
- Yes, of course.
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126. - Here he is.
- Hello.
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127. I know jail can be scary, Bobby.
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128. So, find the biggest, baddest hombre
and punch him right in the face!
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129. What the hell happened, Bobby?
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130. The insurance will cover
the damage to the cars,
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131. but I'm stuck in jail, and I need you
to send me money for bail.
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132. Got dangit, Bobby.
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133. This is exactly the type
of careless behavior I warned you about.
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134. I just texted you the payment link.
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135. $500?
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136. Please, hurry.
I don't want to sleep here tonight!
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137. I'm workin' on it!
I'm workin' on it!
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138. Thank you. I love you.
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139. I, uh...
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140. Well, the important thing
is you're not hurt—
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141. We love you too, son!
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142. - Son?
- Think we got disconnected.
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143. I'll wire the money now.
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144. Bobby was with Joseph.
He might be in trouble too, or dead.
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145. I'm sure Bobby would've said
something if Joseph was dead.
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146. We should check
with the Gribbles, Hank.
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147. Nancy! Have you heard from Joseph?
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148. Sure, Sug,
I'm talkin' to him right now.
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149. - Say hi to the Hills.
- Hey, Mr. and Mrs. Hill.
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150. Joseph, have you talked to Bobby?
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151. - Uh, yeah.
- Oh, hey, guys!
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152. This is Camila and her sister, Angela.
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153. They own the bed and breakfast
we're staying at.
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154. You have a nice son.
Big stomach.
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155. What the hell, Bobby,
why aren't you in jail?
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156. I... uh, what?
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157. You just called me from
a Mexican prison a minute ago.
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158. Did you get the money I wired to ya?
It said it went through.
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159. Dad, I have no idea
what you're talkin' about.
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160. Oh, no, Sugs.
I think y'all have been scammed.
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161. Not me.
I said it was a wrong number.
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162. There was a data breach
at the insurance company.
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163. That's how the scammers
got your information.
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164. But I don't understand.
It sounded just like my son on the phone.
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165. AI cloning.
It's a very common "emergency" scam.
Copy !req
166. Did you notice "your son" speakin'
in a strange or unnatural manner?
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167. He always talks in a strange manner.
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168. He told us he loved us.
There was nothing unnatural about that.
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169. How did I get scammed?
There's nobody more cautious than me.
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170. I wear my seatbelt in the car wash.
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171. Sorry, but unfortunately, there's not much
we can do at this point.
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172. This is what my tax dollars
are paying for?
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173. - "Sorry's" and "unfortunately's"?
- Wait.
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174. I have one of those
Police Benevolent Association stickers
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175. on my car.
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176. That gets us special treatment, right?
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177. I was saving it for a speeding ticket,
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178. but I have my good looks
to get me out of those.
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179. Best thing we can do is help you
keep this from happenin' again.
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180. Here, take these.
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181. A class?
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182. You're not even gonna try
to track this guy down?
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183. Just bust open the door
to his hacking hangout
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184. with one of those new tanks
the department was begging for.
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185. Those tanks are reserved
for the Cowboys parade.
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186. Ugh. Gah.
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187. - Yep.
- Don't feel bad, Hank.
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188. It's happened to the best of us.
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189. Can't tell you how many
mail-order bride scams I've fallen for.
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190. It was five.
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191. Worst part is, I have no recourse.
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192. Used to be if a man
stole somethin' from ya,
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193. you'd just find him and whoop his ass.
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194. Then, there was all those times
I was catfished.
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195. Boy, I sent a lot of money
to the Philippines.
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196. Ain't gon' lie, man,
spottin' 'em scammers,
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197. is pretty dang ol' easy, man,
there's somethin' strange
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198. 'bout the way them folk talk, man.
Sniff it out every dang ol' time.
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199. If you don't exist,
then you can't get scammed.
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200. I don't pick up the phone.
I don't open any mail,
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201. electronic or snail,
or carrier pigeon.
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202. I am an apparition.
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203. If you want, I can help
disappear you too, Hank.
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204. I don't wanna live like that.
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205. Luckily, my pen pal,
the Nigerian princess,
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206. warned me about the gift card scam.
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207. Ow!
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208. It even hurts to turn my head.
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209. Sorry!
I didn't know sunscreen could expire.
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210. I mean, I used it too, and I'm fine.
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211. Whatever.
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212. Swing through Arlen on the way back
so I can check on my dad.
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213. I feel bad he was scammed.
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214. - Shit.
- What now?
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215. Uh, I forgot my passport.
We gotta turn around.
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216. No, no, no.
Look down, it's in your lap.
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217. Uh, how long has it been there?
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218. Hank?
Why are we in a room
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219. filled with octogenarians?
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220. Excuse me, I'm only 76.
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221. And you still have your hearing.
Good for you!
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222. Ahem, welcome to SAPS,
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223. Seniors Against
Phishers and Scammers.
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224. Here, we will teach you the tools to live
cyber-safe, healthy digital lives.
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225. Oh, oh! Excuse me.
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226. Please save your questions
until the end of—
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227. I just wanted to point out
that I am not a senior,
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228. as the name of this class implies.
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229. Okay, but you're still here
because you've been scammed.
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230. No, my husband was.
Right, Hank?
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231. Uh... yeah.
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232. Well, perhaps you could
support your husband
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233. and all these other people,
and quietly lead by example.
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234. I know what you're doing,
and I will allow it.
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235. - If there are no other concerns—
- Yeah, uh,
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236. I have a concern about something
you said a second ago.
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237. See, I'm not interested
in living a "healthy digital life."
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238. I just wanna learn how
to track down these criminals
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239. so I can kick their asses.
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240. Sir, over three million Americans
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241. are victims of fraud every year,
and less than 1% of those cases
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242. have ever been solved.
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243. I know you all wanna take action
and go on the offensive,
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244. but when it comes to cyber safety,
the best offense
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245. is a good defense, just like football.
Copy !req
246. Or is it the other way around
in football?
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247. I'm more of a chess fan.
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248. - I should kick his ass.
- What was that?
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249. He said he wanted
to kick the instructor's ass!
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250. Now, this is an image
of a phishing email.
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251. There are several obvious clues
which indicate that.
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252. Mr. Hill, can you identify any of them?
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253. Uh... I'm not sure.
I guess, uh—
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254. The sender's address is fake.
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255. Yes.
Good eye, Maryann.
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256. Mr. Hill, someone with delayed
tech literacy like yourself
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257. may need the aid
of some anti-scam software.
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258. We happen to sell one for $99.99.
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259. Well, I guess this is cheaper
than the 500 I lost to the scammer.
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260. No, this is a scam!
I was testing you.
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261. There— there's even a picture
of a Trojan horse on the box.
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262. My Lord, you nearly lost your money again.
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263. Why would I think
you're trying to scam me?
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264. Will my husband's incompetency
affect my grade?
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265. Hey, Dad, I got you a gift from Mexico.
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266. It's a shot glass that says,
"Tequila made me do it."
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267. - Just put it down over there.
- Okay.
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268. So, I just stopped by
to see how you were feelin'.
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269. Well, I'm still upset with you,
if that's what you're asking.
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270. Wait, you're upset with me
because you got scammed?
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271. I only got scammed
because I thought
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272. - you were being irresponsible again.
- Again?
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273. - What is that supposed to mean?
- You forgot the list.
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274. If you had taken it, you would've seen
that item 12 was bring sunscreen,
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275. and you wouldn't have come back
lookin' like a damn fire hydrant.
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276. Huh!
Maybe I should make you a list.
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277. Don't worry, it's way shorter
than the one you made.
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278. Number one, don't get scammed.
That's it.
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279. I was trying to keep you safe, as always.
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280. I'm the guy that keeps us
prepared and protected.
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281. Well, maybe you aren't that guy anymore!
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282. I gotta go.
Have fun with your holes.
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283. I will.
I always do.
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284. I had a feeling you'd be here.
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285. Also, I saw you
on my infrared cameras.
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286. Just teach me
how not to get scammed again.
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287. I'm not lookin' to go full Gribble.
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288. Hello, I'm Hank Hill
and I think propane
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289. is the devil's oxygen.
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290. I would never say that!
How is this even legal?
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291. This is a parody.
Fair use, baby.
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292. Watch this.
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293. I'm Bill Dauterive.
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294. I have both human
and feline genitalia.
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295. Come on, that's funny.
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296. You made AI renderings
of everyone in the neighborhood?
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297. Only the ones dumb enough
to let me record them.
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298. You made AI renderings of everyone
in the neighborhood?
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299. - Stop that.
- I'm just trying to show you,
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300. this is how those scammers
tricked you with Bobby's voice.
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301. - Anyone can do it.
- Anyone?
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302. It's a depraved new world, Hank.
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303. That's why you need to live
in the shadows like me.
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304. I scrub the internet every single day
to erase my digital footprints.
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305. I create and kill off
a new alias every week,
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306. and I always wear polymer gloves
if I touch anything,
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307. including myself.
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308. - Okay, that's enough.
- You think I'm crazy, don't you?
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309. But guess who's never
been scammed or phished,
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310. or had his identity stolen?
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311. Cleverton Wiswall!
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312. So, who's crazy now, Hank Hill?
Social security number 263—
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313. Okay, okay, I get it.
Show me what I need to do.
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314. Welcome to the Dale side, Hank.
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315. What the hell, Hank?
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316. Hi, you've reached the home
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317. of, uh, two random people.
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318. You sure you wanna use
your own voice?
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319. Hello, you've reached the home
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320. of my neighbors,
the, uh, human family.
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321. Then he started taking it out on me,
Copy !req
322. like it was my fault.
Copy !req
323. You should cut your dad some slack.
He's just shaken up.
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324. I can tell you're distracted too.
You haven't even kissed me hello yet.
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325. Sorry, just— ah, my lips
are sunburned too.
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326. Oh, screw it.
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327. Mm.
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328. Ooh!
Worth it.
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329. Why is it so dark in here?
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330. We've been robbed!
Copy !req
331. Help me.
Copy !req
332. - What the hell happened?
- The power went out,
Copy !req
333. so I had to eat all the food
before it went bad.
Copy !req
334. But you ate all the food
out of the cupboards, too.
Copy !req
335. The power was out in the cupboards too.
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336. You forgot to pay
the electric bill, didn't you?
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337. I reminded you 100 times.
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338. Oh, that's what's so weird.
I did pay it.
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339. I even remember
entering my credit card...
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340. Oh, I see what happened.
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341. You're gonna find this funny.
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342. I forgot to hit confirm again.
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343. Got dangit, Joseph.
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344. Oh, it's no big deal.
I'll confirm it now.
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345. See?
All taken care of.
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346. I gotta be honest, I thought the lights
would turn right back on.
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347. Ugh, I've had it!
You are way too irresponsible.
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348. Hey, chill.
They'll probably be back on by tomorrow.
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349. It's not just that.
It's everything.
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350. The expired sunscreen,
the hotel reservation—
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351. Okay. Okay.
I— I know you're mad
Copy !req
352. and I'm happy to talk about it
right after I throw up again.
Copy !req
353. - You alright?
- I see now why my dad
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354. gets so frustrated with me.
Copy !req
355. It's exactly how I feel about Joseph
droppin' the ball all weekend.
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356. So, like, I'm Joseph... to my dad.
Copy !req
357. - Oh, it's so much!
- Wow, good analogy.
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358. I'd be turned on if you didn't look
like a paper-maché volcano.
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359. Oh man, I— I may have gone too far
Copy !req
360. tellin' my dad
that he couldn't protect us anymore.
Copy !req
361. My mom said he was actin'
pretty nutty after that,
Copy !req
362. like, Mr. Gribble nutty.
Copy !req
363. Yikes.
Copy !req
364. But hey, he's always been
a reasonable man.
Copy !req
365. I'm sure he'll come to his senses.
Copy !req
366. Hank, you have a call!
Copy !req
367. What? No.
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368. What the hell, Peggy?
I told you not to answer the phone.
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369. We are not going to live
the rest of our lives
Copy !req
370. afraid of every call that comes in.
Copy !req
371. Besides, you are going to
want to talk to this person.
Copy !req
372. - Hello?
- Hank Hill?
Copy !req
373. This is Sly Stallone.
Copy !req
374. I'm callin' all my biggest fans
such as yourself
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375. to tell you that I'm doing
a sequel to Over the Top.
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376. Really? Well, uh,
that's interesting, Mr. Stallone.
Copy !req
377. See? I told you!
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378. If you don't mind me asking,
how did you get my number?
Copy !req
379. From your profile
on the Over the Top...
Copy !req
380. fan club website.
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381. You used to be very active
on the message boards.
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382. And what was my username
on those message boards?
Copy !req
383. - Hank Hill.
- Could have been a lucky guess.
Copy !req
384. Anyway, Hank,
I'm offering an exciting opportunity
Copy !req
385. to a select few super fans
to be a producer
Copy !req
386. on Over the Top 2: Arm-ageddon.
Copy !req
387. And if you contribute $10,000,
Copy !req
388. you'll get a co-executive producer credit.
Copy !req
389. He's asking for money.
That's a red flag.
Copy !req
390. But you gotta act fast.
There's only one co-EP credit left.
Copy !req
391. They don't just give those out
in Hollywood, you know.
Copy !req
392. And now, he's doin'
the time pressure thing.
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393. He's goin' right by the book.
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394. Well, Hank,
what is your gut telling you?
Copy !req
395. Mr. Stallone, I'm in.
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396. This country needs
a blue-collar arm-wrestling hero
Copy !req
397. now more than ever.
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398. Oh, uh, wow, Mr. Hill,
you really are a true fan.
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399. Say, will you be drivin'
that box van from the original?
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400. Uh, yeah, I can't wait to drive
that thing again,
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401. thanks to your contribution.
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402. And you know how much
I'd like to contribute?
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403. Jack squat.
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404. You drove an 18-wheeler
in that movie,
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405. not some rolling toaster.
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406. I must have forgot that.
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407. Well, I don't see how.
Your character's big rig was iconic.
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408. You got me.
I'm not the real Sylvester Stallone.
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409. No, you're not.
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410. You know, the real Sylvester Stallone
should kick your ass
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411. for misusing his good name,
and I'd join him if I could.
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412. Please don't kick my ass, sir.
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413. Look, whoever you are,
you should be ashamed of yourself.
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414. Why don't you do somethin'
productive with your life?
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415. Take my son.
He seemed like a lost cause,
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416. but he ended up finding somethin'
he's damn good at.
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417. Now I'm gonna do the modern version
of kicking your ass.
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418. I'm blocking your number
and reporting it as spam.
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419. Goodbye.
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420. - Hoyeah!
- Yes!
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421. I knew my dad's instincts
would kick back in.
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422. Thank you, Connie.
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423. Your mom did a good job
playing her part, too.
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424. She told me she spent three hours
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425. gettin' into her favorite character.
Herself.
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426. Now, let's use AI to call my dad
as Jackie Chan.
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427. Your password manager is all set.
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428. And to access this,
I need to use a stupid authenticator app?
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429. Don't worry, you'll get used to it.
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430. Just think of this like a lockbox
for your online valuables.
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431. The cyber-safety guy
said that every family
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432. should have a code word
for suspicious calls.
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433. What do we think of "kumquats"?
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434. I'm not sayin' that word.
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435. Fine.
I made a whole list of options.
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436. How about "kiwi"?
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437. - Does it have to be fruit?
- What about "serendipity"?
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438. That's a cool word
and a decent movie.
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439. Wrong on both accounts.
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440. Just stop me when you hear
something you like.
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441. Here we go.
"Quaint."
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442. - "February."Hat."
- "Monkey!"
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443. Uh-uh, wait your turn, son.
"Needle."
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444. "Noodle."
"Spectacles..."
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445. This is somethin'
I wouldn't mind letting AI handle.
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446. "Paddle."
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447. "Carnitas."Chupacabra."
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448. "Toblerone."
"Beefsteak."Herbivore."
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449. "Acquaintanceship."
"Didgeridoo."
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450. "Smock."
"Flibbertigibbet."
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451. "Cooperation."
"Bundt."
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452. "Ukulele."
"Chimichanga."
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453. "Waddle."
"Hallelujah."Polyp."
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454. "Iridescent."
"Jaunty."
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455. "Lounge wear."
"Horticulture."
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456. "Goggles."
"Knockwurst."
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457. "Hubba Bubba."
"Popcorn."
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458. "Cabbage."
"Zoink."
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459. "Wabi Sabi."
"Dracula."
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460. "Luminescence."
"Scam."
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461. You know how much
I'd like to contribute? Jack squat.
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