1. Gum's still here, Joseph.
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2. That's 37 days and counting.
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3. Hey, what's Amy doing?
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4. Maybe she's giving
everyone pictures of herself
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5. so we can take them
home and stare at them.
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6. I heard some dude tell this
other dude in the bathroom
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7. that she's having a party.
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8. Joseph, we have
to go to this party.
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9. Do you think she'll invite us?
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10. We're so in.
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11. Remember how you made her laugh
when you did your monkey voice?
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12. Yeah, but then you asked if
her mom was as hot as she is
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13. and it really freaked her out.
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14. What are you doing?
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15. I'm gonna touch her neck.
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16. Put your hand down!
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17. You weren't invited.
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18. I hate Amy.
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19. No, I love her.
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20. Look, there she is with
all her "cool" friends.
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21. Wait, how did the new
kid make the inner circle?
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22. Kathy Griffin is going all in.
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23. Why do movie stars think we
want to watch them play poker?
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24. Mom, Dad,
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25. I need some money to
get a new pair of jeans.
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26. What happened to your old pair?
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27. Did you make cut-offs again?
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28. No, but I need something cooler.
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29. I think a hundred
dollars ought to cover it.
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30. Ugh!
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31. There's no way I'm
buying you those jeans.
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32. They're asinine.
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33. Bobby, sometimes you're cooler
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34. if you don't wear what
everyone else is wearing.
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35. So that's it?
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36. I don't get a say in
what I get to wear?
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37. Not when I'm paying for it.
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38. I'd pay for it, but I
don't have any money.
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39. Well, that's too bad.
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40. Because if you did,
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41. I couldn't tell you
what to spend it on.
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42. Really?
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43. Well, sure.
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44. Someone who makes his
own money is his own man.
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45. No one can tell him
what to do or what to buy.
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46. I'm gonna get a job.
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47. Yep.
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48. Yep.
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49. Yup.
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50. Mm-hmm.
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51. So Bobby wants me to
spend a hundred dollars
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52. on some idiotic jeans that
already look 20 years old.
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53. Are kids today so lazy they
can't break in a pair of pants?
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54. Rhetorical question. Not
grounds for conversation.
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55. Moving on.
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56. Don't be such a
cheapskate, Hank Hill.
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57. You and Peggy
made him look like you.
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58. The least you could
do is buy him nice pants.
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59. Shut up, Khan.
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60. I told Bobby if he wanted them,
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61. He'd have to buy them
with his own money.
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62. He said he's going to get a job,
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63. but I'm not holding my breath.
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64. If I had a son,
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65. I'd buy him whatever he wanted.
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66. Of course, he'd probably
end up walking all over me.
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67. But we'd have fun for awhile.
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68. Sorry I'm late.
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69. Grillstravaganza's coming up
and, well, I got to daydreaming.
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70. That's okay, Dad. We
saved you a seat right here.
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71. What the heck is that?
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72. I got a job.
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73. Joseph and I are advertising
the new apartments
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74. on Frontier Street.
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75. Isn't it exciting, Hank?
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76. And look, he's a natural.
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77. Bobby, where's the kitchen?
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78. Over there.
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79. Well that's great, Bobby.
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80. You wanted a job, and
you went out and got one.
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81. That's gumption,
I tell you what.
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82. Well this gumption's
gonna buy me some jeans.
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83. Hey Dad, can you
pass me the butter?
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84. Let's eat, then after dinner
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85. you can point at things.
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86. Whoever decided where
to put the rips is a genius.
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87. Okay, Joseph,
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88. time to make some money
so we can buy those jeans.
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89. Hey, that guy's
reading your arrow.
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90. Make him turn! Close the deal!
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91. Did he turn?
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92. Excuse me, where do I go
to find a deluxe apartment?
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93. Why this way, sir.
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94. He's only 13, moron.
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95. Why would he want
to rent an apartment?
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96. I just thought...
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97. Nice outfit.
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98. You look like a lipstick.
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99. Why don't you use that
arrow to find your butt.
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100. This job has made us so
dorky, I want to kick my own ass.
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101. Oh, no,
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102. cool guys.
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103. And you look like
that and I look like this.
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104. Just put your head
down and keep walking.
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105. Yeah, righteous.
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106. Hey, what's up, dudes?
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107. Us? Dudes?
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108. Yeah, you dudes.
What's going on?
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109. Uh, not much. Just hanging.
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110. Yeah, hanging.
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111. Feel that. You got some change?
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112. Sure. Sure.
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113. Thanks, man. You're all right.
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114. If it's a party, we'll be there.
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115. Hey, can I have a dollar?
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116. Get a job.
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117. I tried, but yours
doesn't pay enough.
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118. So is Tanya coming?
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119. She's smokin'.
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120. Change? You got any change?
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121. Dude, tell him not
to let Tommy deejay.
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122. He's going through a
weird country music phase.
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123. Change?
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124. Thanks, bra.
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125. So, wait... you guys just
ask people for money,
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126. and they give it to you?
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127. Some do, some don't.
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128. It separates the
righteous from those
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129. who are just taking up space.
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130. Great shoes.
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131. Can I have some of
your money? Thanks.
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132. Bumming is so cool.
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133. This is my spot!
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134. Spongy's spot!
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135. Yeah, right.
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136. I don't see your name on it.
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137. Hey, Drew, do you
see "Weird Old Dude"
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138. written on the sidewalk?
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139. Nah, man.
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140. Why would we give
up this primo location?
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141. No, Spongy's spot.
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142. Been here since Ronald Reagan
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143. kicked me out of
my mental hospital.
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144. When was that? Back
in like 19-something?
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145. Oh, come on.
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146. He's not very cool, is he?
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147. Not at all, man.
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148. Nice. I'm only two bucks away
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149. from those kick-ass
aviator shades.
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150. Here.
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151. Thanks, bro-bah.
Catch you later.
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152. Catch you later!
Catch you later!
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153. Aw man, I guess we
got to go back to work.
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154. Joseph, I'm giving
us a promotion.
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155. We're begging!
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156. Could you maybe spare some...
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157. change?
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158. If you give me a dollar
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159. you can punch me
anywhere but my head.
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160. Joseph,
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161. don't be like that Spongy guy.
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162. Nobody wants to give money
to someone who's desperate.
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163. They want to give it
to someone who's cool.
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164. Look at Derek,
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165. he acts like he doesn't
even want the money.
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166. Like he's doing them
a favor by taking it.
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167. Hi, Derek.
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168. We brought you a veggie wrap.
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169. Hugs! Hugs! Hugs!
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170. Aw, man, he's
really got it going on.
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171. Wait, did I just
sound like a chick?
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172. Okay, I think I got
the hang of this.
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173. Hey, dude. Change?
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174. Change?
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175. Got some change for me?
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176. I did it!
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177. You know, if you take
the paper off this sander,
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178. it makes a nice massager.
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179. M y neck feels like Jell-O.
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180. So, I saw Bobby leaving for
work pretty early this morning.
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181. Not that I was
watching your house.
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182. Yeah, I guess he's
really enjoying his job.
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183. You know, I don't want
to count my chickens,
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184. but everything I've been
trying to teach Bobby
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185. may be finally sinking in.
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186. Why does it always
take a hardware store
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187. to get you to open up, Hank?
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188. Wash your windows?
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189. Spongy?
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190. What are you doing over here?
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191. This isn't your
neck of the woods.
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192. No money for Spongy.
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193. Too many people. Took my spot.
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194. Well, dang, that ain't right.
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195. You've been there for years.
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196. Since Ronald Reagan kicked
me out of my mental hospital.
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197. Well, it was
complicated, Spongy.
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198. Dutch was trying to
win a Cold War and...
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199. Mine. Mine, mine, miney, mine!
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200. Uh, here's another dollar.
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201. Good luck.
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202. And, uh, you don't have
to wash my windows.
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203. Wash your windows?
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204. Okay.
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205. There you go.
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206. Look at this!
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207. That guy just gave me two dimes
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208. and a third dime.
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209. We've made more today
than we would've in a week
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210. at that stupid arrow job.
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211. We almost have enough
for that sweet, sweet denim.
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212. Heads up.
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213. Suit alert.
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214. 'Sup, fellas.
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215. Spare some change?
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216. Did that guy just
give you a dollar?
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217. Uh, yeah.
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218. You, like, hang
out on the street
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219. and ask people for money?
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220. Yeah.
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221. You got any?
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222. Uh... uh, I think so.
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223. The little mama in the poncho
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224. just gave me a fiver.
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225. Who wants some
mocha? Bobby? Joseph?
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226. Sure. Sure.
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227. I don't know if you
guys have heard,
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228. but I'm having a party and...
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229. We might be able to do a pop-in.
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230. Let's just keep it loose.
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231. 'Sup, 'sup, 'sup. 'Sup.
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232. Oh, man,
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233. those are the guys
who live on the streets.
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234. I heard they got a
dollar off Principal Moss.
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235. I heard Principal Moss
tried to suspend them,
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236. but he couldn't
look them in the eye.
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237. That was cool!
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238. Let's do it again.
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239. Huh.
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240. I do like sourdough.
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241. I told you you did.
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242. Bobby, don't think I haven't
noticed your new jeans.
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243. You look very handsome.
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244. Thanks.
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245. You know, I feel handsome.
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246. Well, I hate those
pants more than life itself,
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247. but I can't tell you about
that because I didn't buy them.
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248. You know, Dad, you were right.
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249. This working thing is great.
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250. I thought I was happy
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251. back when I was just
spending your money,
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252. but spending my own
money is even better.
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253. I'll be taking that.
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254. Thank you. No, Bobby.
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255. You shouldn't spend your
hard-earned money on us.
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256. But I made it and I can
spend it on whatever I want.
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257. Right, Dad?
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258. Your father is very proud.
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259. What up, Judy?
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260. Hey, Tom, looking good.
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261. Hi, Mrs. Green.
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262. Rockin' hair net.
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263. How about you score me
an extra scoop of potatoes?
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264. Thanks, Mrs. G.
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265. Hi, Bobby. Nice shirt.
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266. That's my favorite
fake baseball team.
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267. Thanks.
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268. So, I don't know
if you like movies,
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269. or going to the
mall, but if you do,
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270. I was thinking we
could go out sometime.
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271. Yeah, that sounds cool.
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272. Great. See ya later.
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273. Man, life is so sweet.
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274. Spare some change?
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275. I love my job, I
got great clothes.
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276. Hey, buddy, got a dollar?
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277. And my interest
level among the ladies
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278. is on the riz-ize.
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279. Thanks a lot, man.
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280. Have a nice greed.
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281. But what I like best
is being my own man.
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282. Why do you do it, Derek?
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283. I don't know, it's just cool.
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284. I mean, take that guy.
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285. He has money, I'm
over here wanting it.
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286. It's just economics, dude.
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287. Yeah.
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288. Awesome.
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289. If I do this every
day 'til I die,
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290. I'm going to be so rich!
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291. Yeah, then we can buy a
jet and fly to other countries
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292. and ask them for their
money... like Euros.
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293. And China money.
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294. Uh, good work, Spongy.
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295. Hank, we can't drive like this.
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296. Now go in and get
something to clean the window.
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297. I can't clean it if he's
standing right there.
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298. It would hurt his feelings.
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299. Well, we can't just sit here.
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300. There's a store on Main Street
where we can get some Windex.
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301. Stick your head out the window
and tell me where we're going.
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302. I can see why
Ladybird likes this.
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303. Hey, bra, spare some change?
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304. Bobby?
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305. Ah...!
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306. What in the heck do
you think you're doing?
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307. I'm working.
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308. This is my job.
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309. You're a bum.
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310. Is this how you paid for
our dinner? How could you?
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311. How could you disrespect steak?
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312. I'm not one of those "bum" bums.
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313. I'm a cool bum.
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314. You're not going to
be any kind of bum.
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315. Now get in the car.
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316. Why are you so upset?
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317. You told me to
earn my own money,
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318. and I am... tons of it.
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319. You're not earning anything.
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320. You're sitting on your butt
while people hand it to you.
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321. Dude, either give him
some change or move on.
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322. Are you the reason my
son is out here begging?
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323. Yeah, and you're welcome, guy.
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324. Car. Now.
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325. So this bum guy,
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326. he wasn't in a wheelchair?
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327. Nope.
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328. And he wasn't
yelling about Jesus?
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329. No.
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330. He was a normal,
able-bodied kid.
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331. I don't understand.
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332. Are you sure he was a bum?
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333. Yes, and he's got
Bobby being a bum, too.
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334. "Homeless," Hank.
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335. They prefer to be
called "homeless."
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336. Bobby is not homeless.
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337. He has a home... my home.
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338. Well, I don't mind that
Joseph is "homeless."
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339. He begs for money.
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340. I get to spend it.
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341. It's win-win, really.
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342. No! It's wrong.
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343. Guys like Spongy beg
because they have to,
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344. but these punks
are doing it for fun.
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345. How much spare change do
you think there is in Arlen anyway?
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346. I agree with Hank.
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347. If you're gonna beg for money,
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348. you have to be crazy,
drunk, or disabled.
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349. Or one of those guys
who paints himself silver
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350. and moves like a robot.
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351. All right, Bobby.
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352. We're not leaving
until you unbum
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353. every cent you took
from these people.
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354. I don't understand.
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355. If people want to give me
money, what's the big deal?
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356. The big deal is if you're
relying on handouts,
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357. you're not in control
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358. of your life.
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359. You're letting other people
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360. decide how you live.
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361. Does this boy
look familiar to you?
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362. You may have given
him some change.
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363. Did you give me some change?
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364. Here's your change.
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365. Take back your change.
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366. Hank Hill.
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367. Well, that customer
is full of bunk.
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368. Sales tax is absolutely
constitutional.
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369. All right, put him on.
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370. Bobby, I've gotta take this.
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371. You just keep giving
that money back.
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372. Fine.
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373. I think you gave me some money.
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374. Did you give me a dollar?
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375. Hey, Bobby.
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376. We're gonna go buy
Lance Armstrong bracelets.
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377. You wanna come?
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378. I can't.
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379. My dad is making me give back
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380. all the money I
bummed off people.
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381. Oh, you should
totally give it to us.
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382. Then we're doing
each other a solid.
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383. We get the money and
you don't have to stand here
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384. looking like a tool.
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385. No, I'm supposed to give it back
to the people who gave it to me.
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386. Come on, Bob.
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387. Us street guys
gotta stick together.
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388. You're cool, right?
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389. Yeah.
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390. Man, if anybody finds
out we're not bums,
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391. we're so not gonna
be cool anymore.
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392. Yeah, we got to protect our rep.
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393. Hey, bra, spare a pencil?
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394. Sure. Here's two.
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395. Hey, Bobby.
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396. So, have you seen the
new Will Ferrell movie yet?
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397. No. It looks pretty
funny though.
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398. He's got those
shoes that can talk.
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399. Yeah, I really want to see it.
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400. Yeah, me, too.
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401. So...
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402. So.
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403. Oh.
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404. You wanna go see
it this weekend?
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405. Sounds great.
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406. Dang it. What am I gonna do?
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407. How am I supposed to
take Sandy to the movies
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408. when I don't have any money?
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409. I wish I could help you out,
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410. but my Dad found my
money and bought stuff.
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411. Does Sandy like cigarettes?
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412. Hey, dude, how
about some change?
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413. How about you go drop dead?
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414. Will do, bud.
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415. Hey, Bob, what's up?
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416. Hey, guys, I need your help.
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417. I asked this really cute girl to
the movies and she said yes,
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418. but I don't have any money,
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419. So can I have some of that
change I gave you the other day?
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420. Sorry, dude, we spent it.
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421. Yeah, we got Barks
that cool dog hoodie.
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422. Oh, sorry.
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423. Good luck with your chick.
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424. That's it?
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425. You don't have anything for me?
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426. What about that all that money?
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427. I thought we were
all sticking together.
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428. Please.
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429. Come on, I'm desperate.
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430. Dude, he's freaking out.
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431. Seriously, you're
screwing up our action.
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432. Let's hit the Coinstar
and grab some Thai.
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433. Come on, guys.
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434. What about the time
we chilled together?
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435. You called me dude.
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436. I need money!
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437. Have you seen Bobby?
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438. Ladybird's not
going to wash herself.
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439. Finally, something your
precious dog can't do.
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440. Hey, Kahn!
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441. Is Bobby doing
homework with Connie?
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442. What you think, he over
here begging for answers?
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443. Ah, but seriously, Hank, I see
him on street corner downtown.
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444. Dang it.
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445. You may not have
perspective on this,
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446. being hillbilly redneck, but it
bring shame on your family.
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447. That sign better not say
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448. you're some kind of veteran.
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449. Can't talk, Dad.
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450. I'm on the clock.
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451. You're working?
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452. Well, yeah.
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453. I mean, like you said,
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454. I can't just count on people
giving me money when I need it,
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455. and I really need it
for my date tonight.
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456. I don't know what
a vasectomy is,
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457. but if you want to reverse it,
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458. here's a coupon.
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459. Uh, you know, it's
kinda hot out here.
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460. I'm gonna get you a soda.
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461. You just keep working.
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462. Nice sign, dude.
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463. Hey, I'm trying to work here.
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464. "Work." Go punch
your time card, worker.
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465. Hey dude, spare some change?
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466. Hey, Derek.
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467. Here's your mocha.
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468. Thanks.
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469. Don't give them money!
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470. Get your vasectomies reversed!
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471. Why shouldn't they have to work
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472. like the rest of us?
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473. I'm busting my tail,
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474. and they're just
sitting on theirs
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475. with their hands out.
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476. They're not homeless.
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477. They're not street people.
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478. They're not even bums.
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479. They're just posers.
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480. Lazy posers.
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481. I know for a fact he has
basic and premium cable.
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482. And he takes tennis lessons.
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483. Cut the crap, dude.
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484. I wouldn't do that.
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485. If I were you, I would
get out of here right now.
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486. Or, or what?
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487. You'll tell my mom?
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488. No, I'll kick your ass
up one side of the street
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489. and down the other.
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490. This place is weak.
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491. So, don't you have a
date you need to get to?
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492. I think I'm gonna put
in a couple more hours
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493. for snack money.
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494. A small popcorn and no drink
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495. is no way to start
a relationship.
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496. Hey, there, Spongy.
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497. Good to see you got
your old spot back.
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498. Congratulations,
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499. You're back on top. Kinda.
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500. You paid for a song.
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501. So how long do we
have to stand here?
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502. 'Sup, 'sup, 'sup. - 'Sup.
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