1. OH, HERE IT GOES.Copy !req
2. ALL RIGHT!Copy !req
3. THANK YOU
VERY MUCH! MAN!Copy !req
4. THANK YOU
FOR JOINING USCopy !req
5. FOR THIS FINE
INSTALLMENTCopy !req
6. OF THE KENAN & KEL
SHOW.Copy !req
7. IF I WAS MEETING YOU
FOR THE FIRST TIME,Copy !req
8. I'D PROBABLY SAY,
"HELLO, HOW YOU
DOING?Copy !req
9. MY NAME IS KENAN!Copy !req
10. AND IF I WAS MEETING YOU
FOR THE FIRST TIME,Copy !req
11. I WOULD SAY,
"I DON'T KNOW WHO YOU ARE,Copy !req
12. BUT I'M PRETTY SURE
MY NAME IS KEL!"Copy !req
13. UH, KEL...Copy !req
14. YOU MIGHT FIND THIS
HARD TO BELIEVE,Copy !req
15. BUT, UH, I'VE RUN
OUT OF CRAZY IDEASCopy !req
16. TO GET US
IN TROUBLE.Copy !req
17. REALLY? GREAT!Copy !req
18. WHOA! WHOA! WHOA!
WAIT, MAN.Copy !req
19. IT'S NOT GREAT.Copy !req
20. IF THERE'S
NO TROUBLE,Copy !req
21. THERE'S NO SHOW.Copy !req
22. THEN LET'S GO HOME!Copy !req
23. NO. W-W-W-WAIT.Copy !req
24. I KNOW WHAT WE'LL DO.Copy !req
25. CALL THE TROUBLE
HOTLINE.Copy !req
26. HEE HEE HEE.Copy !req
27. THE TROUBLE HOTLINE?Copy !req
28. MM-HMM.Copy !req
29. SHH! IT'S RINGING.Copy !req
30. HELLO! AND THANK YOU
FOR CALLING TROUBLE PHONE.Copy !req
31. IF YOU'RE LOOKING FOR TROUBLE
INVOLVING A DONKEY,Copy !req
32. PRESS ONE NOW.Copy !req
33. TROUBLE INVOLVING
THE ELDERLY,Copy !req
34. PRESS 2.Copy !req
35. IF YOU HAVE YOUR OWN
TELEVISION SHOWCopy !req
36. AND YOU NEED TROUBLE
FOR TONIGHT'S EPISODE,Copy !req
37. PRESS 3.Copy !req
38. IF YOU'RE CALLING FROM
COUSIN SKEETER,Copy !req
39. PRESS ONE.Copy !req
40. IF YOU'RE CALLING FROM
THE KENAN & KELSHOW,Copy !req
41. PRESS 2.Copy !req
42. OH, MAN. YOU DON'T NEED ANY
TROUBLE SUGGESTIONS FROM ME.Copy !req
43. YOU GUYS WILL HAVE
PLENTY OF PROBLEMSCopy !req
44. TO DEAL WITH
IN TONIGHT'S SHOW.Copy !req
45. GOOD LUCK.Copy !req
46. HEY, MAN.Copy !req
47. THAT'S GREAT.Copy !req
48. WE DON'T HAVE
TO WORRY ABOUT
GETTING IN TROUBLE.Copy !req
49. NOW, COME ON!
HUMPER TEE!Copy !req
50. KENAN, IS THERE A "GET OUT
OF TROUBLE" HOTLINE?Copy !req
51. KENAN!Copy !req
52. HOW COME ALL OF US
HEARD THE PHONE?Copy !req
53. KENAN!Copy !req
54. AWWWWW! HERE IT GOES!Copy !req
55. KENAN!Copy !req
56. I'M UPSET, MAN.Copy !req
57. I JUST BOUGHT
THESE EARPHONES,Copy !req
58. AND I CAN'T HEAR A THING.Copy !req
59. THAT'S BECAUSE
THEY'RE NOT PLUGGED
UP TO ANYTHING, KEL.Copy !req
60. YOU GOT TO PLUG
THEM IN IF YOU WANT
TO HEAR THE MUSIC.Copy !req
61. OHH!Copy !req
62. NOT AN APPLE, MAN!
I MEANT PLUGGING
THEM IN—Copy !req
63. THAT'S BETTER!Copy !req
64. HERE. GET MOPPING.Copy !req
65. OHH. THIS IS AWFUL.Copy !req
66. JUST AWFUL.Copy !req
67. THIS IS
THE WORST DAY
OF MY ENTIRE LIFE.Copy !req
68. SOMETHING WRONG, CHRIS?Copy !req
69. NO, NO.
WHY DO YOU ASK?Copy !req
70. BECAUSE YOU SAID,
"THIS IS AWFUL, JUST AWFUL,Copy !req
71. THIS IS THE WORST DAY
OF MY ENTIRE LIFE."Copy !req
72. OH, THAT.Copy !req
73. WELL, TODAY IS
MOTHER'S BIRTHDAY.Copy !req
74. YOUR MOTHER'S BIRTHDAY?Copy !req
75. AH, MAN.
THAT'S JUST AWFUL.Copy !req
76. MAN, WHAT IS
THE WORLD COMING TO?Copy !req
77. KEL, THAT'S NOT
THE AWFUL PART.Copy !req
78. OH.Copy !req
79. MY BROTHER RICK
IS COMING TO TOWN.Copy !req
80. I DIDN'T KNOW
YOU HAD A BROTHER.Copy !req
81. YEAH. UNFORTUNATELY, I DO.Copy !req
82. HE'S WEALTHY,
SUCCESSFUL, HANDSOME,Copy !req
83. AND EVERYBODY LOVES HIM,Copy !req
84. ESPECIALLY WOMEN.Copy !req
85. AND THAT'S
AWFUL BECAUSE...Copy !req
86. IT'S AWFUL BECAUSE HE ALWAYS
GOES OUT OF HIS WAYCopy !req
87. TO MAKE ME FEEL
LIKE A NERDY,Copy !req
88. LITTLE, WIMPY
MAMA'S BOY.Copy !req
89. AND DON'T FORGET WHINY!Copy !req
90. YEAH. THAT—Copy !req
91. I'M NOT WHINY!Copy !req
92. N-N-NOW, PLEASE, PLEASE!Copy !req
93. HELP ME GET THIS PLACE
CLEANED UPCopy !req
94. BEFORE RICK GETS HERE!Copy !req
95. COME ON!Copy !req
96. KENAN, WHY AREN'T
YOU MOPPING?Copy !req
97. YOU JUST GAVE ME THE—Copy !req
98. ALL RIGHT!Copy !req
99. AFTER MOPPING,
I NEED YOU TO SCRUBCopy !req
100. EVERY ITEM
IN THE STORE
WITH MY TOOTHBRUSH.Copy !req
101. BUT—Copy !req
102. GET TO WORK!Copy !req
103. KENAN.Copy !req
104. HMM?Copy !req
105. HEY!Copy !req
106. I HAVE NEVER BEEN
THIS EXHAUSTEDCopy !req
107. IN MY ENTIRE LIFE!Copy !req
108. I'M NEVER GETTING OFF
OF THIS COUCH.Copy !req
109. GET OFF THE COUCH.
I WANT TO WATCH TV.Copy !req
110. WHAT'S WRONG
WITH YOU?Copy !req
111. MAN, CHRIS' BROTHER'S
COMING TO TOWN,Copy !req
112. AND HE'S ALL
FREAKED OUT ABOUT IT,Copy !req
113. SO HE MADE ME CLEAN UP
THE WHOLE STORE.Copy !req
114. YEAH. KENAN HAD
TO SWEEP, MOP,Copy !req
115. WAX, BUFF, DUST.Copy !req
116. MAN, I GOT SO TIRED
JUST WATCHING HIM!Copy !req
117. HEY, EVERYBODY!
I MADE COOKIES!Copy !req
118. COOKIES! WHOO!Copy !req
119. BE CAREFUL!
IT'S HOT!Copy !req
120. WOULD YOU GUYS
LIKE SOME—Copy !req
121. AAH! IT'S HOT! IT'S HOT!Copy !req
122. AAH!Copy !req
123. OW!Copy !req
124. OW! HOT! HOT!Copy !req
125. AHH!Copy !req
126. DADDY, YOU KNOW
WHAT THAT LOOKS LIKE?Copy !req
127. YES, I KNOW WHAT
IT LOOKS LIKE!Copy !req
128. WAY TO RUIN
THE COOKIES!Copy !req
129. COME ON!
NO, NO, NO.
ROGER, ROGER.Copy !req
130. LET'S GET YOU
SOMEWHERE KEL
ISN'T, OK?Copy !req
131. COME ON.Copy !req
132. UHH!Copy !req
133. KENAN! KENAN, CLEAN UP
THIS MESS, WOULD YOU?Copy !req
134. OH.Copy !req
135. OH, KENAN,
THAT REMINDS ME.Copy !req
136. CHRIS CALLED.Copy !req
137. HE SAID HE WANTS YOU
TO COME IN EARLY TOMORROWCopy !req
138. SO YOU CAN CLEAN
THE WHOLE STORE AGAIN.Copy !req
139. WHAT!Copy !req
140. OH, MAN!Copy !req
141. I CAN'T DO ANOTHER
HARD DAY'S WORK
LIKE I DID TODAY.Copy !req
142. IT'S TOO HARD.Copy !req
143. I WISH CHRIS
WASN'T SO WORRIEDCopy !req
144. ABOUT WHAT
HIS BROTHER THINKS.Copy !req
145. IF ONLY HIS LIFE
WASN'T SO BORING
AND UNINTERESTING.Copy !req
146. THAT'S IT!Copy !req
147. WE GOT TO MAKE IT SEEMCopy !req
148. LIKE CHRIS LEADS
A REALLY EXCITING LIFE.Copy !req
149. GIVE ME THE PHONE.Copy !req
150. OH, I SEE WHERE YOU'RE
GOING WITH THIS.Copy !req
151. WHEN CHRIS' BROTHER
SEES CHRIS
WITH THIS PHONE,Copy !req
152. HE'S GOING TO BE
SO IMPRESSED.Copy !req
153. YES!Copy !req
154. NO, MAN!Copy !req
155. THE PHONE IS FOR ME.Copy !req
156. I'VE GOT A PLAN.Copy !req
157. 555-PLAN.Copy !req
158. THANK YOU
FOR SHOPPING
AT RIGBY'S.Copy !req
159. I'M JUST AS GOOD
AS MY BROTHER.Copy !req
160. I'M SURE YOU ARE.Copy !req
161. KENAN,
WHERE WERE YOU?Copy !req
162. THIS PLACE
IS A MESS,Copy !req
163. AND RICK'S
GOING TO BE HERE
ANY MINUTE.Copy !req
164. CALM DOWN, CHRIS.Copy !req
165. C-C-CALM?
I'M CALM!Copy !req
166. I DON'T HAVE
ANY ISSUES
WITH MY BROTHER,Copy !req
167. JUST 'CAUSE HE TREATS
ME LIKE A KIDCopy !req
168. OR WHETHER MOTHER
LOVES HIM BETTER THAN ME.Copy !req
169. ONCE AGAIN,
MAY I REITERATE—
CALM DOWN!Copy !req
170. CHECK IT OUT, MAN.Copy !req
171. WE GOT THE SOLUTION
TO ALL YOUR PROBLEMS.Copy !req
172. REALLY? YEAH.Copy !req
173. NOW, WHAT'S
THE ONE THING
YOU HAVECopy !req
174. THAT YOUR
BROTHER DOESN'T?
YEAH.Copy !req
175. MY PEWTER COW COLLECTION.Copy !req
176. UHH! UHH! UHH! WRONG!Copy !req
177. THE CORRECT ANSWER
IS YOUR WIFE
AND THE KIDS.Copy !req
178. WIFE AND KIDS?Copy !req
179. I DON'T HAVE
A WIFE AND KIDSCopy !req
180. HEY, YOU DO NOW.Copy !req
181. YEAH. KEL AND I
WENT OUT AND HIREDCopy !req
182. A LADY AND SOME KIDS
TO PRETEND TO BE
YOUR FAMILY.Copy !req
183. WHAT?
THAT'S RIDICULOUS.Copy !req
184. AND IT'S DISHONEST.Copy !req
185. BESIDES, I DON'T
NEED A WIFE AND KIDS
TO IMPRESS RICK.Copy !req
186. HE IS GOING TO BE
ENVIOUS ENOUGHCopy !req
187. WHEN HE SEES
THE BIRTHDAY GIFT
I GOT MOTHER.Copy !req
188. AH!Copy !req
189. WOW!Copy !req
190. YOU GOT, UH, UH...Copy !req
191. UH...Copy !req
192. WHAT'S THAT?Copy !req
193. IT'S AN EXACT REPLICA
OF AN EGYPTIAN PYRAMID.Copy !req
194. MOTHER JUST LOVES
ANYTHING TO DO WITH EGYPT.Copy !req
195. RICK WILL NEVER
BE ABLE TO TOP THIS.Copy !req
196. YO! CHRISSY!Copy !req
197. HEY, RICK.Copy !req
198. YOU LOOK GREAT.Copy !req
199. AND YOU...Copy !req
200. ARE RIGHT.
I DO LOOK GREAT.Copy !req
201. AHHHHHHHH!
HA HA HA HA!Copy !req
202. W-W-WHAT?
IT WAS FUNNY.Copy !req
203. MAN, I CAN'T BELIEVE
YOU TWO ARE BROTHERS.Copy !req
204. I MEAN, YOU GUYS DON'T
LOOK ANYTHING ALIKE.Copy !req
205. LET ME GUESS.
YOU GUYS MUST WORK HERE,Copy !req
206. 'CAUSE I KNOW CHRIS
DOESN'T HAVE ANY FRIENDS.Copy !req
207. YEP. I'M KENAN,
AND THIS IS
MY GOOD FRIEND KEL.Copy !req
208. YOU KNOW, ACTUALLY,
CHRIS IS A WONDERFUL-Copy !req
209. HOLD THAT THOUGHT,
SPARKY.Copy !req
210. RICK HERE.Copy !req
211. YEAH!Copy !req
212. OH, I'M SORRY.Copy !req
213. I'D MUCH RATHER
HAVE DINNER WITH YOU,Copy !req
214. BUT I GOT TO DO THIS
BORING FAMILY THING.Copy !req
215. YEAH.Copy !req
216. HA HA HA. HE STILL
LIVES WITH OUR MOTHER.Copy !req
217. HA HA HA. ALL RIGHT.Copy !req
218. WELL, I'LL TALK
TO YOU LATER, OPRAH.Copy !req
219. AH!Copy !req
220. MAN, YOU WERE
TALKING TO OPRAH?Copy !req
221. AS IN OPRAH WINFREY?Copy !req
222. H-H-HEY,
THAT'S ALL RIGHT.Copy !req
223. MICHAEL JORDAN GAVE HER
MY PHONE NUMBER,Copy !req
224. AND NOW SHE JUST
WON'T STOP CALLING ME.Copy !req
225. M-M-MICHAEL!Copy !req
226. MICHAEL JORDAN!
OH, MAN!Copy !req
227. I WANT TICKETS!Copy !req
228. NOT THAT WE WOULD
BE IMPRESSED BY STUFF
LIKE THAT.Copy !req
229. SURE, WE ARE, MAN.Copy !req
230. HE KNOWS OPRAH WINFREY.Copy !req
231. CHRIS,
WHY DON'T YOU SHOW
YOUR BROTHER THE GIFTCopy !req
232. THAT YOU GOT FOR YOUR
MAMA'S BIRTHDAY?Copy !req
233. OH, YEAH.Copy !req
234. WAIT, WAIT.Copy !req
235. ME FIRST.Copy !req
236. YOU KNOW HOW MOM
LOVES ANYTHING TO DO
WITH EGYPT?Copy !req
237. YEAH?Copy !req
238. WELL, GET THIS.Copy !req
239. I AM SENDING HER
ON A TWO-WEEK VACATION
TO EGYPT!Copy !req
240. SHE IS GOING TO GET
TO SEE THE ACTUAL PYRAMIDS.Copy !req
241. SO, UH, WHAT
DID YOU GET HER?Copy !req
242. I HAVE A WIFE
AND KIDS.Copy !req
243. WHAT?Copy !req
244. THAT'S RIGHT. HE HAS
A BEAUTIFUL WIFE
AND KIDS.Copy !req
245. WE PICKED 'EM
OUT OURSELVES!Copy !req
246. THEY'RE OUTSIDE.
GO GET 'EM, KEL.Copy !req
247. HEY, GUYS! IT'S SHOWTIME!Copy !req
248. DADDY! DADDY!Copy !req
249. OHH!Copy !req
250. I'M NOT YOUR DADDY.Copy !req
251. THERE YOU ARE.
ALL RIGHT.Copy !req
252. HEY, KIDS.Copy !req
253. DARLING!Copy !req
254. OH, I MISSED YOU
SO MUCH.Copy !req
255. EVERY MOMENT WITHOUT YOU
IS LIKE AN ETERNITY.Copy !req
256. YEP, RICK,
THIS IS THE WIFE,Copy !req
257. THE LITTLE LADY.Copy !req
258. UH... MRS. POTTER.Copy !req
259. DON'T KISS ME.Copy !req
260. RIGHT, SORRY.Copy !req
261. DON'T THEY MAKE
A LOVELY COUPLE?Copy !req
262. AREN'T YOU
JUST ENVIOUS? MMM!Copy !req
263. YOU ARE A LUCKY MAN.Copy !req
264. YEAH. SHE'S HOT!Copy !req
265. YOU KNOW, CHRIS,Copy !req
266. I ALWAYS THOUGHT YOU WERE
A BIG, PATHETIC LOSER,Copy !req
267. BUT, WELL, NOW
THAT I SEE THIS...Copy !req
268. I'M CONVINCED.Copy !req
269. YOU'RE AN EVEN BIGGER LOSER
THAN I THOUGHT YOU WERE.Copy !req
270. DID YOU REALLY THINK
I WOULD FALL FOR THIS?Copy !req
271. UH, W-W-WHAT ARE YOU
TALKING ABOUT?Copy !req
272. HONEY, HONEY—Copy !req
273. OH, FORGET IT.
HE'S ON TO YOU.Copy !req
274. YOU KNOW...Copy !req
275. YOU'RE KINDA CUTE.Copy !req
276. THAT'S WHAT THEY TELL ME.Copy !req
277. YEAH!Copy !req
278. HE KNOWS MICHAEL JORDAN
AND OPRAH!Copy !req
279. REALLY?Copy !req
280. COULD I BUY YOU
SOME COFFEE?Copy !req
281. SURE.Copy !req
282. NICE MEETING YOU GUYS.Copy !req
283. SEE YOU AT MOM'S, CHRISSY.Copy !req
284. LOSER!Copy !req
285. RICK, I ASKED—Copy !req
286. NO!Copy !req
287. I TOLD YOU
TO COME HERE TODAYCopy !req
288. BECAUSE I'VE GOT
A FEW THINGS I WANT TO SAY.Copy !req
289. I AM SICK AND TIRED
OF YOU MAKING ME FEELCopy !req
290. LIKE MY LIFE
IS DULL AND WORTHLESS.Copy !req
291. IT'S NOT!Copy !req
292. SO, AS OF RIGHT NOW,Copy !req
293. YOU'RE GOING TO START
SHOWING ME SOME RESPECT.Copy !req
294. DO I MAKE MYSELF CLEAR?Copy !req
295. I SAID, DO I MAKE
MYSELF CLEAR?Copy !req
296. CHRIS, STOP PRACTICING
ON THAT HEAD OF LETTUCE NOW.Copy !req
297. YOUR BROTHER'S OUT FRONT.Copy !req
298. GOOD.Copy !req
299. IT'S ABOUT TIME HE AND I
HAD A LITTLE TALK.Copy !req
300. THAT'S RIGHT.Copy !req
301. SO THIS CAME OFF
OF AN ACTUAL PONY?Copy !req
302. RICK!Copy !req
303. I HAVE
SOMETHING I WANT
TO SAY TO YOU.Copy !req
304. I HAVE BEEN WAITING
A LONG TIME
TO TELL YOU THIS.Copy !req
305. WHAT?Copy !req
306. I AM SICK AND...Copy !req
307. UH...Copy !req
308. UH...Copy !req
309. FEELING MUCH
BETTER NOW THOUGH.Copy !req
310. IT WAS JUST
A SINUS THING.Copy !req
311. NOT TO WORRY.Copy !req
312. THAT'S GREAT. LISTEN,
I HAVE SOMETHING I REALLY
WANT TO TELL YOU, TOO.Copy !req
313. I HAVE GOT GREAT NEWS.Copy !req
314. YOU'RE LEAVING?Copy !req
315. I BOUGHT RIGBY'S.Copy !req
316. Y-YOU—Y-YOU
BOUGHT RIGBY'S?Copy !req
317. THAT'S RIGHT, CHRISSY.Copy !req
318. I FIGURED THAT
WITH MY GOLDEN TOUCH,Copy !req
319. I COULD TURN EVEN A DUMP
LIKE THIS INTO A WINNER.Copy !req
320. SO THIS MEANS THAT
YOU'RE GOING TO BE
MY NEW BOSS NOW?Copy !req
321. YEP.Copy !req
322. AND CHRISSY'S, TOO?Copy !req
323. THAT'S RIGHT.Copy !req
324. IMAGINE THAT, CHRISSY?Copy !req
325. YOU ARE GONNA BE
BE WORKING FOR ME.Copy !req
326. REALLY? NO KIDDING.Copy !req
327. YEP.Copy !req
328. AND THEN CHRIS
JUST FAINTED LIKE—Copy !req
329. OHH!Copy !req
330. OH. POOR, POOR CHRIS.Copy !req
331. HEY, ROCKMORES!Copy !req
332. SORRY I'M LATE
FOR DINNER!Copy !req
333. LATE! YOU WEREN'T
INVITED.Copy !req
334. WELL, THEN
I'M NOT SORRY.Copy !req
335. I'LL GET IT!Copy !req
336. AH.Copy !req
337. HI, KENAN.Copy !req
338. CHRIS, WHAT
YOU DOING HERE?Copy !req
339. CHRIS, DON'T YOU
KNOW IT'S RUDECopy !req
340. TO SHOW UP
TO DINNER UNINVITED?Copy !req
341. I'M AFRAID I'VE GOT
SOME BAD NEWS.Copy !req
342. I QUIT RIGBY'S.Copy !req
343. NO. WHAT?Copy !req
344. WHY WOULD YOU
QUIT RIGBY'S?Copy !req
345. I REFUSE TO WORK
FOR MY BROTHER.Copy !req
346. HE MAY HAVE
RIGBY'S,Copy !req
347. BUT AT LEAST
I'VE STILL GOT
MY DIGNITY.Copy !req
348. CHRIS—OH.Copy !req
349. FOOD! UHH!Copy !req
350. OOH!Copy !req
351. MMM! MMM! MMM!Copy !req
352. CHRIS?Copy !req
353. MMM.Copy !req
354. DIDN'T YOUR MOTHER
MAKE YOU DINNER?Copy !req
355. OH, DIDN'T I MENTION?Copy !req
356. I'M NOT LIVING
WITH MOTHER ANYMORE.Copy !req
357. THAT'S RIGHT.Copy !req
358. I'M NOT SETTING FOOT
IN THAT HOUSECopy !req
359. AS LONG AS RICK IS THERE.Copy !req
360. SO WHERE ARE YOU
GOING TO STAY?Copy !req
361. OH, I DON'T KNOW.Copy !req
362. I GUESS I'LL JUST
WANDER THE STREETS
FOR A WHILE.Copy !req
363. MAYBE SLEEP IN A PILE
OF TRASH SOMEWHERE.Copy !req
364. BUT DON'T WORRY ABOUT ME.Copy !req
365. I'LL BE OK. AHEM.Copy !req
366. AH.Copy !req
367. I'M A BIG BOY NOW.Copy !req
368. OK, HERE I GO.Copy !req
369. I'M GOING...Copy !req
370. NOW.Copy !req
371. OK, CHRIS. BYE!Copy !req
372. PEACE!Copy !req
373. CHRIS! WAIT, WAIT.Copy !req
374. WHY DON'T YOU
STAY HERE WITH US?Copy !req
375. DIDN'T YOU HEAR HIM?Copy !req
376. HE SAID HE WANTED
TO GO TO SLEEP IN
A PILE OF GARBAGE.Copy !req
377. CHRIS, IT'S OK.Copy !req
378. YOU CAN STAY HERE
WITH US... TEMPORARILY.Copy !req
379. GEE, I DON'T KNOW.Copy !req
380. I MEAN, I DON'T WANT
TO IMPOSE.Copy !req
381. WE INSIST.Copy !req
382. OK.Copy !req
383. I'LL GO GET MY STUFF.Copy !req
384. OH. THEN IT'S SOLVED.Copy !req
385. LET'S GO EAT.
CAN YOU FIX HIM A PLATE?Copy !req
386. WELL, ARE YOU GUYS
JUST GONNA STAND THERECopy !req
387. OR ARE YOU GONNA
HELP ME WITH MY BAGS?Copy !req
388. OH! NO, MR. PORCUPINE.Copy !req
389. I THOUGHT
YOU WERE MY FRIEND.Copy !req
390. UHH! UHH! UHH! UHH!Copy !req
391. MOTHER! MOTHER!Copy !req
392. HELP! MOTHER, HELP!Copy !req
393. HELP! HELP! HELP!Copy !req
394. HELP! MOTHER!Copy !req
395. HELP!Copy !req
396. CHRIS!Copy !req
397. IS EVERYTHING OK?Copy !req
398. OH.Copy !req
399. I-I-I'M FINE.Copy !req
400. I MUST'VE BEEN
HAVING A NIGHTMARE.Copy !req
401. OH, I'M SORRY
IF I WOKE YOU.Copy !req
402. THAT'S OK.Copy !req
403. OH!Copy !req
404. WHAT IS IT NOW?Copy !req
405. IT'S JUST THAT
I CAN'T GET TO SLEEPCopy !req
406. AFTER I HAVE
A NIGHTMARE.Copy !req
407. IS THERE
ANYTHING WE CAN
DO TO HELP?Copy !req
408. NO.Copy !req
409. OK.Copy !req
410. ACTUALLY...Copy !req
411. MOTHER USUALLY
MAKES ME HOT COCOA.Copy !req
412. THAT HELPS ME
FALL BACK ASLEEP.Copy !req
413. I GUESS I CAN
MAKE YOU SOME COCOA.Copy !req
414. IT ALSO HELPS
WHEN MOTHER ROCKS ME
TO SLEEP.Copy !req
415. CHRIS...Copy !req
416. I AM NOT GOING
TO ROCK YOU TO SLEEP.Copy !req
417. OH, THAT'S OK.Copy !req
418. I GUESS I'LL JUST
BE UP ALL NIGHT,Copy !req
419. TOSSING AND TURNING,Copy !req
420. REALLY LOUDLY.Copy !req
421. OK.Copy !req
422. YOU KNOW, I SLEEP
MUCH BETTER WHEN
MOTHER SINGS TO ME.Copy !req
423. THANK YOU
FOR SHOPPINGCopy !req
424. AT THE NEW AND
IMPROVED RIGBY'S.Copy !req
425. NICE UNIFORM. HA HA HA.Copy !req
426. HO HO. HEY.Copy !req
427. I HAVEN'T HEARD
THAT 20 TIMES TODAY,Copy !req
428. SO WHY DON'T YOU
TAKE YOUR LITTLE BAG
OF GROCERIES,Copy !req
429. AND GET OUT OF HERE!Copy !req
430. WHOO! YEAH!Copy !req
431. HEY, KENAN.Copy !req
432. OH! OHH.Copy !req
433. HEY, NICE UNIFORM.Copy !req
434. IT'S NOT NICE.Copy !req
435. I HATE WEARING THIS
UGLY OLD THING.Copy !req
436. I FEEL LIKE
A CIRCUS FREAK.Copy !req
437. I'M ONLY WEARING IT
'CAUSE RICK'S MAKING ME.Copy !req
438. WISH RICK WOULD
MAKE ME WEAR ONE.Copy !req
439. HEY, RICK, I NEED
TO TALK TO YOU.Copy !req
440. SAY NO MORE, CHAMP.Copy !req
441. I DON'T MIND
IF YOU WANT TO WEAR
THE UNIFORM OUTSIDE WORK.Copy !req
442. JUST MAKE SURE
YOU KEEP IT CLEAN.Copy !req
443. THAT'S NOT WHAT
I WAS GOING TO SAY.Copy !req
444. OH, NEVER MIND!Copy !req
445. WHO LOVES
ORANGE SODA?Copy !req
446. A LOT OF PEOPLE
LOVE ORANGE SODA.Copy !req
447. EXCUSE ME!Copy !req
448. I'M IN THE MIDDLE
OF A THING HERE!Copy !req
449. HUH!Copy !req
450. OK, NOW WHERE WAS I?Copy !req
451. OH, YEAH, THAT'S IT.Copy !req
452. KEL LOVES
ORANGE SODA!Copy !req
453. IS IT TRUE?Copy !req
454. MM-HMM!Copy !req
455. I DO, I DO, I DO.Copy !req
456. OOH! OH, YEAH.
COME ON.Copy !req
457. COME TO PAPA.
THERE YOU GO.Copy !req
458. HEY, HEY, HEY!
YOU'RE GOING TO HAVE
TO PAY FOR THAT.Copy !req
459. WHAT?Copy !req
460. PAY FOR ORANGE SODA?Copy !req
461. CHRIS NEVER MADE ME
PAY FOR ORANGE SODA.Copy !req
462. HE NEVER MADE ME
PAY FOR ANYTHING.Copy !req
463. OH, YEAH. WELL, SEE...Copy !req
464. CHRIS DOESN'T
WORK HERE ANYMORE.Copy !req
465. OHH!Copy !req
466. YOU JUST LOST
A CUSTOMER, BUB!Copy !req
467. I'M NEVER TAKING
ANYMORE FREE STUFF
FROM THIS STORE AGAIN.Copy !req
468. HUH! TAKE IT BACK!Copy !req
469. TAKE IT BACK!Copy !req
470. TAKE IT BACK!Copy !req
471. TAKE IT...Copy !req
472. BACK!Copy !req
473. WHAT'S HIS STORY?Copy !req
474. NEVER MIND ABOUT HIM.Copy !req
475. I NEED TO TALK TO YOU
ABOUT CHRIS.Copy !req
476. YEAH? WHAT ABOUT HIM?Copy !req
477. DON'T YOU THINK YOU SHOULD
TRY TO TALK TO HIM?Copy !req
478. WHY WOULD I WANT
TO DO THAT?Copy !req
479. BECAUSE YOU GUYS
ARE FAMILY, YOU KNOW.Copy !req
480. BROTHERS! I MEAN,
DON'T YOU THINK
YOU SHOULD TRYCopy !req
481. TO PATCH THINGS UP
AND GET HIM TO COME
BACK TO WORK?Copy !req
482. RIGBY'S IS HIS LIFE.Copy !req
483. PLEASE! HE'S JUST
BEING A BIG BABY.Copy !req
484. TRUST ME. HE'LL COME
CRAWLING BACK.Copy !req
485. ALL RIGHT, LOOK.Copy !req
486. I'M ONLY GOING TO TAKE
ONE MORE FREE THING.Copy !req
487. BUT I TELL YOU THIS!Copy !req
488. THIS IS THE LAST TIME!Copy !req
489. WHOA! IT'S
FREEZING IN HERE.Copy !req
490. ROGER, TURN DOWN THE
AIR CONDITIONING,
PLEASE.Copy !req
491. OK.Copy !req
492. NO, NO.
DON'T TOUCH IT.Copy !req
493. I'VE GOT IT SET JUST
THE WAY I LIKE IT.Copy !req
494. WELL, AS LONG
AS YOU'RE COMFORTABLE.Copy !req
495. OH. WHAT DID
YOU GET ME?Copy !req
496. WE BROUGHT YOU
A NEWSPAPER!Copy !req
497. AND WE CIRCLED THE
JOBS YOU MIGHT WANT
TO APPLY FOR.Copy !req
498. MM-HMM. AND SOME
APARTMENTS YOU MIGHT
WANT TO MOVE INTO.Copy !req
499. OH, YEAH,
THAT'S GREAT.Copy !req
500. SO, WHAT DO YOU
GOT TO EAT?Copy !req
501. POTATO CHIPS!Copy !req
502. WITH RIDGES?Copy !req
503. OH, I GUESS THEY'LL DO.Copy !req
504. HELLO, KENAN!Copy !req
505. GOT THE VIDEO!Copy !req
506. OH, YEAH.Copy !req
507. OH, GREAT. WHAT MOVIE
ARE WE GONNA WATCH?Copy !req
508. WEARE GONNA WATCH
THE GRAVEYARD MASSACRE.Copy !req
509. OH, NO. THAT'S
A SCARY MOVIE.Copy !req
510. WE CAN'T WATCH THAT.Copy !req
511. WHY NOT?Copy !req
512. BECAUSE I SCARE
TOO EASILY.Copy !req
513. EVER SINCE
THIS ONE HALLOWEEN,Copy !req
514. MOTHER TOOK
RICK AND ME
TO A HAUNTED HOUSECopy !req
515. AND TOLD US IT WAS
OUR NEW HOME.Copy !req
516. SHE LEFT US THERE
FOR TWO WHOLE DAYS.Copy !req
517. NO! MAN, THAT MUST
HAVE LEFT SOME DEEP-ROOTED,
EMOTIONAL SCARSCopy !req
518. THAT YOU'RE GOING
TO HAVE TO STRUGGLE WITH
FOR THE REST OF YOUR LIFE.Copy !req
519. SURE DID.Copy !req
520. EVER SINCE THEN,Copy !req
521. RICK AND I BOTH
CAN'T HANDLE
ANYTHING SCARY.Copy !req
522. HUH.Copy !req
523. CAN'T HANDLE
ANYTHING SCARY, HUH?Copy !req
524. INTERESTING.Copy !req
525. SON, WHAT IS IT?Copy !req
526. LOOK, I WANTED TO HAVE
A MEETING ABOUT CHRIS.Copy !req
527. WE GOT TO DO SOMETHING.Copy !req
528. UH-HUH.Copy !req
529. KENAN, I WAS
THINKING
THE SAME THING!Copy !req
530. I JUST FEEL
SO BAD FOR HIM
THOUGH.Copy !req
531. MAN, I DON'T KNOW HOW
YOU GUYS DEAL WITH IT.Copy !req
532. I MEAN, I COULD NOT
DEAL WITH SOMEBODYCopy !req
533. JUST AT MY HOUSE
ALL THE TIME,Copy !req
534. JUST EATING ALL MY FOOD.Copy !req
535. I MEAN, IT'S JUST
SO ANNOYING.Copy !req
536. ANYWAY...Copy !req
537. I THINK I FIGURED OUT A WAY
TO GET CHRIS OUT OF HERE.Copy !req
538. OK. WELL,
LET'S HEAR THE PLAN.Copy !req
539. WHAT ARE YOU ALL DOING HERE
IN THE MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT?Copy !req
540. UM...Copy !req
541. UM... MOM?Copy !req
542. WHAT ARE WE...
ALL DOING IN HERE?Copy !req
543. WAS THAT
THE QUESTION,
CHRIS, BECAUSE I—Copy !req
544. OH... YES,Copy !req
545. BUT, YOU KNOW,
I DON'T REALLY CARE.Copy !req
546. ROGER, DO YOU MIND?Copy !req
547. I'LL BE RIGHT THERE.Copy !req
548. AND, CHERYL, IF YOU
COULD MAKE SURE THE
COCOA ISN'T TOO HOT.Copy !req
549. THE LAST TIME
IT BURNED MY TONGUE.Copy !req
550. PEACE!Copy !req
551. PEACE TO YOU.Copy !req
552. OK. SO TELL ME MORE
ABOUT THIS PLAN TO
GET RID OF CHRIS,Copy !req
553. 'CAUSE
HE'S GOT TO GO.Copy !req
554. ALL RIGHT. NOW IT TURNS OUT
THAT CHRIS' BROTHERCopy !req
555. IS TERRIFIED
OF HAUNTED HOUSES.Copy !req
556. SO?Copy !req
557. SO... WE'LL MAKE RIGBY'S
SEEM LIKE IT'S HAUNTEDCopy !req
558. SO THAT HE'LL WANT NOTHING
TO DO WITH THE PLACE.Copy !req
559. MM-HMM.Copy !req
560. AND THEN
HE'LL LEAVE TOWNCopy !req
561. BECAUSE HE WON'T
HAVE ANY REASON
TO STAY.Copy !req
562. AND THEN CHRIS
WILL LEAVE OUR HOUSE.Copy !req
563. YEAH! NOW ARE WE ALL IN?Copy !req
564. OH, BABY, WE IN!Copy !req
565. ROCKMORES!Copy !req
566. THE KIMBALLS! HA! WHOO!Copy !req
567. HEY, RICK, YOU WANT ME
TO TURN THE LIGHTS OFF
WHEN I LEAVE?Copy !req
568. NO, LEAVE THEM ON.Copy !req
569. I'VE GOT SOME WORK
TO FINISH UP
BEFORE I LEAVE.Copy !req
570. W-W-WAIT.Copy !req
571. YOU MEAN, YOU'RE GOING
TO STAY HERE AT RIGBY'SCopy !req
572. ALL BY YOURSELF
AFTER HOURS?Copy !req
573. BRAVE MAN.Copy !req
574. BRAVE MAN.Copy !req
575. WHY?Copy !req
576. WHAT'S THE BIG DEAL?Copy !req
577. DON'T YOU KNOW?Copy !req
578. RIGBY'S IS HAUNTED!Copy !req
579. HAUNTED?Copy !req
580. YEAH.Copy !req
581. WE'RE TALKING
GHOSTS...Copy !req
582. ZOMBIES...Copy !req
583. AND BUNNY RABBITS!Copy !req
584. WELL, SOME PEOPLE
ARE SCARED
OF BUNNY RABBITS.Copy !req
585. COME ON, GUYS.Copy !req
586. I MEAN, YOU KNOW,
HAUNTED...Copy !req
587. GET OUT!Copy !req
588. I'M CONVINCED.
LET'S GO!Copy !req
589. OH!Copy !req
590. GET OUT OF THE WAY,
YOU IDIOT!Copy !req
591. NO! OH, NO.
THE DOOR'S CLOSED.Copy !req
592. GET OUT!Copy !req
593. WE'RE TRYING!Copy !req
594. THE BACK DOOR!Copy !req
595. AAH! AAH!Copy !req
596. THE BACK DOOR!Copy !req
597. AAH!Copy !req
598. AAH!Copy !req
599. OH! THERE'S—
THERE'S SOME—Copy !req
600. THERE'S—AAH!Copy !req
601. I GOT THE FRONT DOOR OPEN!Copy !req
602. AAH!Copy !req
603. HA HA HA! HA HA HA!Copy !req
604. HO! HEY-HO!Copy !req
605. HEY! HEY!Copy !req
606. WHAT'S GOING ON?
WHY DID YOU CALL ME—Copy !req
607. ZOMBIES!Copy !req
608. UH-UH-UH, CHRIS,
CALM DOWN, MAN.Copy !req
609. IT'S JUST
MY MOM AND DAD.Copy !req
610. OH, OF COURSE.Copy !req
611. WHAT'S GOING ON HERE?Copy !req
612. WE SCARED YOUR BROTHER
OUT OF RIGBY'S.Copy !req
613. YEAH! WE MADE HIM THINK
RIGBY'S WAS HAUNTED.Copy !req
614. WHAT? YOU DID THAT
FOR ME?Copy !req
615. WELL, ACTUALLY,
THEY DID ITCopy !req
616. SO YOU'D GET OUT
THEIR HOUSE.Copy !req
617. KEL!Copy !req
618. SEE, MAN, YOU SHOULD
HAVE BEEN HERE.Copy !req
619. FIRST, WE RIGGED
THE DOORS SO THAT
THEY WOULD CLOSE.Copy !req
620. HEH-HEH.Copy !req
621. THEN WE GOT THE
LIGHTS TO GO OUT.Copy !req
622. THEN MY PARENTS
CAME IN LOOKING
ALL SCARY.Copy !req
623. HEY, OH, KENAN,
BUT DON'T FORGET,Copy !req
624. WHEN YOU DID THE VOICE,
THAT WAS REAL COOL.Copy !req
625. YOU WERE LIKE, "GET OUT."
MAN, THAT WAS COOL, MAN.Copy !req
626. I DIDN'T DO THAT.Copy !req
627. YOU DIDN'T?Copy !req
628. WELL, I DIDN'T DO IT.Copy !req
629. DON'T LOOK AT ME.IT WASN'T ME.Copy !req
630. WELL, IF Y'ALL
DIDN'T DO IT,Copy !req
631. AND I DIDN'T DO IT,Copy !req
632. THEN WHO—Copy !req
633. GET OUT!Copy !req
634. AAH!Copy !req
635. DON'T LEAVE ME!Copy !req
636. WHOO! THANK YOU!Copy !req
637. OH, WOW!Copy !req
638. LOOK AT THE LOVE!Copy !req
639. WHOO! APPRECIATE THAT,
APPRECIATE THAT.Copy !req
640. DID EVERYBODY
ENJOY THE SHOW, HUH?Copy !req
641. ALL RIGHT!Copy !req
642. WELL, IT LOOKS
LIKE EVERYTHING
TURNED OUT OK.Copy !req
643. I MEAN,
RICK LEFT TOWN,Copy !req
644. AND CHRIS IS BACK
AT RIGBY'SCopy !req
645. AND OUT OF
OUR HOUSE.Copy !req
646. MM-HMM.Copy !req
647. ALTHOUGH, WE NEVER
DID FIGURE OUTCopy !req
648. WHERE THAT
EERIE VOICE
WAS COMING FROM.Copy !req
649. HMM-HMM. THAT WAS ME.Copy !req
650. YEAH, RIGHT.
I DON'T BELIEVE YOU.Copy !req
651. NO. I REALLY DID.Copy !req
652. OK, LOOK,
I'LL PROVE IT TO YOU.Copy !req
653. GET OUT!Copy !req
654. HUH? HUH?Copy !req
655. PRETTY COOL, HUH?Copy !req
656. YEAH.
THAT'S NOT BAD,
BUT, YOU KNOW,Copy !req
657. LIKE MOST THINGS,
THAT GIVES ME
AN IDEA.Copy !req
658. SO, KEL...Copy !req
659. WHY DON'T YOU
GRAB SOMETHING GOOD,Copy !req
660. SOMETHING BAD,Copy !req
661. AND SOMETHING UGLY,Copy !req
662. AND MEET ME
AT THE CORRAL.Copy !req
663. COME ON, PARTNER!Copy !req
664. KENAN!Copy !req
665. WHERE'S THE CORRAL?Copy !req
666. KENAN!Copy !req
667. AWWWWWWW! HERE IT GOES!Copy !req
668. CAPTIONING MADE POSSIBLE BY
NICKELODEON
AND U.S. DEPARTMENT OF EDUCATIONCopy !req
669. CAPTIONING BY THE NATIONAL
CAPTIONING INSTITUTE
—www.ncicap.org—Copy !req
670. WHY-Y-Y-Y-Y-Y-Y!Copy !req