1. OH, HERE IT GOES.Copy !req
2. WHOO!Copy !req
3. THANK YOU.Copy !req
4. ALL RIGHT.Copy !req
5. THANK YOU.Copy !req
6. WELCOME TO THECopy !req
7. KENAN & KELSHOW.Copy !req
8. MY NAME IS KENAN.Copy !req
9. THANK YOU VERY MUCH.Copy !req
10. OH...Copy !req
11. AND THIS—Copy !req
12. HA HA! WHAT'S UP?Copy !req
13. YEAH! YEAH!Copy !req
14. RIGHT! RIGHT!Copy !req
15. YEAH!
RIGHT! RIGHT!Copy !req
16. KEL, WILL YOU
STOP PLAYINGCopy !req
17. AND COME ON
OUT HERE, MAN?Copy !req
18. MAN, YOU'RE
DOING GREAT.Copy !req
19. JUST GO AHEAD.
DO YOUR THINGCopy !req
20. BECAUSE YOU DOING
IT GOOD, BROTHER.Copy !req
21. YOU GOT IT
GOING ON LIKE...Copy !req
22. YEAH, BOY!Copy !req
23. KEL.Copy !req
24. WILL YOU PLEASE
COME FROM BEHIND
THE CURTAINS?Copy !req
25. I DON'T WANT
TO DO THIS SHOW
WITH JUST YOUR HEAD.Copy !req
26. COME ON OUT HERE.Copy !req
27. I—I—I CAN'T.Copy !req
28. WHY NOT?Copy !req
29. NOW, NOW—
I JUST CAN'T NOW.Copy !req
30. I DON'T THINK
THAT'D BE—Copy !req
31. I'M THROUGH PLAYING
WITH YOU.Copy !req
32. JUST GET ON
OUT HERE.Copy !req
33. COME ON
AND MEET THE PEOPLE.Copy !req
34. UH...Copy !req
35. KEL, YOU WANT
TO TELL MECopy !req
36. WHAT YOU'RE
DOING OUT HERE
IN YOUR DRAWERS?Copy !req
37. FREEZING!Copy !req
38. WHERE ARE
YOUR CLOTHES?Copy !req
39. WELL, SEE, I WAS
GOING TO WASH THEM
BEFORE THE SHOW,Copy !req
40. AND THEY'RE
NOT DRY YET.Copy !req
41. SO YOU JUST DECIDED
TO COME OUT HERECopy !req
42. IN FRONT
OF 10 MILLION PEOPLE
JUST HALF-NAKED, HUH?Copy !req
43. NO, LOOK.Copy !req
44. I DIDN'T COME OUT.
YOU DRAGGED ME OUT.Copy !req
45. YOU BETTER GET YOU
SOME CLOTHES ON QUICKCopy !req
46. BECAUSE YOU GOT
QUITE A SHOW HERE.Copy !req
47. WHAT'S GOING TO HAPPEN?
WHAT AM I DOING?Copy !req
48. CAN'T TELL YOU.
EXIT STAGE RIGHT,
PICKLE CHIP.Copy !req
49. UH, KENAN!
KENAN, COME BACK!Copy !req
50. I'M NOT A PICKLE CHIP!Copy !req
51. KENAN, WHY MUST YOU TORMENT
A GUY WITH NO PANTS ON?Copy !req
52. KENAN! KENAN!Copy !req
53. AWW, HERE IT GOES.Copy !req
54. KENAN, YOU'RE GOING
TO BE LATE FOR SCHOOL.Copy !req
55. I'M COMING!Copy !req
56. AH! AH! AH!Copy !req
57. KEL, ARE YOU
ALL RIGHT?Copy !req
58. UH, I THINK SO.Copy !req
59. KEL, IF YOU
DON'T KNOW HOW
TO ROLLERBLADE,Copy !req
60. YOU SHOULDN'T BE
SKATING SO FASTCopy !req
61. THROUGH THE
NEIGHBORHOOD.Copy !req
62. I KNOW HOW TO ROLLERBLADE.
I JUST HAVEN'T LEARNED HOW
TO STOP YET.Copy !req
63. WHERE'S KENAN?Copy !req
64. UPSTAIRS.Copy !req
65. ALL RIGHT.
UH, UM—Copy !req
66. KEL. KEL. KEL!Copy !req
67. HUH?Copy !req
68. YOU WANT TO TAKE
THOSE ROLLERBLADES
OFF IN MY HOUSE?Copy !req
69. UH... NO, THANKS.
HA HA!Copy !req
70. HA HA! DO IT.Copy !req
71. OH, YES, MA'AM.Copy !req
72. MAMA, CAN YOU DRIVE
ME TO SCHOOL?Copy !req
73. I HAVE TO BRING IN
MY ART PROJECT.Copy !req
74. WHAT DID YOU MAKE
FOR ART CLASS?Copy !req
75. WELL, THE TEACHER
SAID WE COULD MAKE
A SCULPTURECopy !req
76. OF ANY GREAT
NATIONAL TREASURE.Copy !req
77. WHAT GREAT
NATIONAL TREASURE
DID YOU SCULPT?Copy !req
78. AAH!Copy !req
79. IT'S KEL.Copy !req
80. I CALL IT
"HEAD OF KEL."Copy !req
81. WHAT DO YOU THINK?Copy !req
82. I THINK YOU
NEED REST.Copy !req
83. OW!Copy !req
84. OH, MAN.Copy !req
85. HI, MOM. HI, KAIRA.
HEY, KEL—Copy !req
86. OW! OW! OW! OW!Copy !req
87. WHAT IN THE WORLD
IS THAT?Copy !req
88. IT'S KEL'S HEAD.Copy !req
89. AAH! MY HEAD!
OH! OH! OW! OH!Copy !req
90. KEL!Copy !req
91. BOY, IT IS NOT
YOUR ACTUAL HEAD.Copy !req
92. OH!Copy !req
93. IT'S A SCULPTURE KAIRA
MADE FOR SCHOOL.Copy !req
94. SCHOOL? WHAT ARE
Y'ALL STUDYING?Copy !req
95. NASTY
FREAK MONSTERS?Copy !req
96. THIS MODEL
HAPPENS TO LOOK
EXACTLY LIKE KEL.Copy !req
97. LIKE I SAID,
WHAT Y'ALL STUDYING?
NASTY FREAK MONSTERS?Copy !req
98. WHOO!Copy !req
99. HA HA HA! YEAH!Copy !req
100. HEY, THAT'S ABOUT ME,
WITH THE FREAK MONSTERS—Copy !req
101. YOU'RE GOING TO BE LATE
FOR SCHOOL. GET GOING.Copy !req
102. ALL RIGHT.
BYE, MAMA, KAIRA.Copy !req
103. GOOD-BYE, KEL.Copy !req
104. YEAH, YEAH, YEAH.Copy !req
105. WHAT HAPPENED
TO YOUR ROLLERBLADES?Copy !req
106. I LEFT THEM
AT THE TOP
OF THE STAIRS.Copy !req
107. THAT IS NO PLACE
TO LEAVE A PAIR
OF ROLLERBLADES.Copy !req
108. WHY NOT?Copy !req
109. HONEY!Copy !req
110. AAH!Copy !req
111. OW!Copy !req
112. S-S-SORRY,
MR. ROCKMORE.
I'M REALLY SORRY.Copy !req
113. KEL, YOU WANT
SOME ADVICE?Copy !req
114. HUH? WHAT?Copy !req
115. RUN.Copy !req
116. RUN, YOU...Copy !req
117. OW!Copy !req
118. OH, ROGER, QUIT
YOUR BELLYACHING.Copy !req
119. BUT MY BACK
REALLY HURTS!Copy !req
120. THE MASSEUSE
WILL BE HERE
ANY MINUTECopy !req
121. TO GIVE YOU
YOUR MASSAGE.Copy !req
122. WHAT WAS KEL
THINKING OF,Copy !req
123. LEAVING A PAIR
OF ROLLERBLADESCopy !req
124. AT THE TOP
OF A STAIRCASE?Copy !req
125. THAT BOY'S DEFICIENT!Copy !req
126. DEFICIENT!Copy !req
127. OH!Copy !req
128. KEL IS NOT
DEFICIENT.Copy !req
129. HE'S JUST
A LITTLE CONFUSED.Copy !req
130. THERE'S THE MASSEUSE.
I'LL LET HIM IN.Copy !req
131. PLEASE HURRY,
BABY. HURRY!Copy !req
132. HI.Copy !req
133. HELLO.
I'M DIRK, THE MASSEUSE.Copy !req
134. I UNDERSTAND SOMEONE
HERE IS HAVING
SOME BACK PAIN.Copy !req
135. I AM. I AM.Copy !req
136. HI. I'M
ROGER ROCKMORE.Copy !req
137. THANKS
FOR COMING BY.Copy !req
138. WHAT HAPPENED
TO YOUR BACK?Copy !req
139. SOME DEFICIENT BOY
MADE ME FALL
DOWN THE STAIRS.Copy !req
140. EXCELLENT.
LET ME GET MY TABLE.Copy !req
141. WE'LL GET RIGHT TO WORK
ON THAT BACK OF YOURS.Copy !req
142. ALL RIGHT. I'LL LEAVE
YOU TWO HERE.Copy !req
143. IF YOU NEED ME,
I'LL BE UPSTAIRS.Copy !req
144. ALL RIGHT.
I WON'T.Copy !req
145. HE SAID
"EXCELLENT," THOUGH.Copy !req
146. EXCELLENT? BAH!Copy !req
147. COME IN. OW!Copy !req
148. OK, HOP UP ON THE TABLE,
AND WE'LL GET STARTED.Copy !req
149. HOP?Copy !req
150. ALL RIGHT.Copy !req
151. OOOOH.Copy !req
152. ALL RIGHT.Copy !req
153. OOOWWW!Copy !req
154. OH! OH!Copy !req
155. WHOA! TAKE IT EASY!Copy !req
156. NOW, JUST RELAX.Copy !req
157. HEY, KENAN!Copy !req
158. OH!Copy !req
159. OOOOOH! GET YOUR HANDS
OFF OF MR. ROCKMORE!Copy !req
160. OH! OH!Copy !req
161. I'LL SAVE YOU!
I'LL SAVE YOU!Copy !req
162. NOW I GOT
TO DEAL WITH YOU.Copy !req
163. OK, COME ON.Copy !req
164. WHOA! OW! OW!Copy !req
165. HEY, KEL—KEL!Copy !req
166. KEL, WHAT ARE YOU DOING?Copy !req
167. THIS MAN WAS BEATING UP
YOUR DADDY. COME HERE.Copy !req
168. I WAS NOT.
I WAS MASSAGING HIS BACK.Copy !req
169. WELL, WHERE'S
MY DADDY NOW?Copy !req
170. OOOHHH!Copy !req
171. THERE HE GO,
RIGHT THERE.Copy !req
172. KEL!Copy !req
173. GET OUT!Copy !req
174. OUT?Copy !req
175. OUT! AWAY! GO! LEAVE!Copy !req
176. AND NEVER COME BACK
HERE AGAIN.Copy !req
177. BUT, FATHER—Copy !req
178. DON'T "BUT, FATHER" ME.Copy !req
179. THAT BOY IS NOTHING
BUT TROUBLE,Copy !req
180. A PIMPLE ON THE FACE
THAT IS MY LIFE.Copy !req
181. YOUR DADDY JUST
CALLED ME A PIMPLE.Copy !req
182. IF THE ZIT FITS!Copy !req
183. THE ZIT FITS?Copy !req
184. I WAS WITH YOU
ON THE PIMPLE, BUT—Copy !req
185. JUST LEAVE!
PLEASE? PLEASE?Copy !req
186. LEAVE—OW!Copy !req
187. AND YOU ARE NEVER
TO SET FOOT IN
THIS HOUSE AGAIN!Copy !req
188. OUT!Copy !req
189. ALL RIGHT.
LAMB FOR EVERYONE.Copy !req
190. MEAT!Copy !req
191. YES! GOOD!Copy !req
192. I LOVE LAMB.
BAAAAH!Copy !req
193. ME, TOO!Copy !req
194. OK, SUGAR, HERE'S
A NICE, BIG PIECE
OF LAMB FOR YOU, BABY.Copy !req
195. THANK YOU MUCH.Copy !req
196. SEE, ISN'T IT NICE
HAVING A LAMB DINNERCopy !req
197. WITH JUST OUR FAMILY?
WITHOUT—WHAT'S HIS NAME?Copy !req
198. HIS NAME IS KEL.Copy !req
199. KEL WHO?Copy !req
200. COME ON, POP!Copy !req
201. KEL DIDN'T MEAN
TO HURT YOUR BACK.Copy !req
202. LET HIM COME OVER.
PLEASE?Copy !req
203. NO, NO, NO, NO,
NO, NO, AND NO.Copy !req
204. SO WHAT YOU'RE
SAYING IS "NO,"
BASICALLY?Copy !req
205. KAIRA!Copy !req
206. HUH?Copy !req
207. WHAT ARE YOU DOING?Copy !req
208. N-N-NOTHING.Copy !req
209. I SAW YOU TAKE
THAT BIG OLD
PIECE OF LAMBCopy !req
210. AND PUT IT
UNDER THE TABLE.Copy !req
211. NO, YOU DIDN'T.Copy !req
212. THEN WHERE IS THAT
BIG PIECE OF LAMBCopy !req
213. I JUST PUT ON YOUR PLATE
A MINUTE AGO?Copy !req
214. MM-HMM.Copy !req
215. NO.Copy !req
216. SHH! SHH! LISTEN!Copy !req
217. WHAT?Copy !req
218. LISTEN.Copy !req
219. WHAT'S THAT NOISE?Copy !req
220. I DON'T KNOW.Copy !req
221. ME NEITHER.Copy !req
222. I KNOW.Copy !req
223. MMM...Copy !req
224. YES?Copy !req
225. OH!Copy !req
226. GIVE ME MY LAMB!Copy !req
227. PAPA!Copy !req
228. I WANT
THE LAMB!Copy !req
229. OUT!Copy !req
230. NO. I WANT
THE LAMB.Copy !req
231. I WANT TO STAY!
I WANT TO STAY!Copy !req
232. OUT!Copy !req
233. I'M—Copy !req
234. AAH!Copy !req
235. HUH?Copy !req
236. THERE!Copy !req
237. WELL, THAT TAKES
CARE OF THAT.Copy !req
238. GEE, I WONDER
WHO THAT COULD BE?Copy !req
239. I'LL GET IT.Copy !req
240. I'LL GET IT.Copy !req
241. UH—Copy !req
242. DADDY—Copy !req
243. HUSH!Copy !req
244. KEL, IS THAT YOU?Copy !req
245. NO. UH, NO.Copy !req
246. YES, IT IS!Copy !req
247. UH—DELIVERY!Copy !req
248. DELIVERY? WHAT ARE
YOU DELIVERING?Copy !req
249. UH, STUFF.Copy !req
250. OH. OK.Copy !req
251. GET YOUR...Copy !req
252. WHAT KIND OF STUFF?Copy !req
253. UH, CHEESE?Copy !req
254. I DIDN'T ORDER
ANY CHEESE.Copy !req
255. NO, NO. THAT'S
GOVERNMENT CHEESE.Copy !req
256. YOU AIN'T GOT
TO ORDER IT.Copy !req
257. SHUT UP!Copy !req
258. UH, OH, UH—
FLOWERS?Copy !req
259. I DIDN'T ORDER
ANY FLOWERS, EITHER.Copy !req
260. YEAH, BUT YOU
MIGHT GET IN GOOD
WITH MAMA IF YOU—Copy !req
261. YOU MIGHT GET—Copy !req
262. HELLO?Copy !req
263. HEY, ROCKMORES—Copy !req
264. GO AWAY!Copy !req
265. TSK, TSK.Copy !req
266. OH, OH, OH!Copy !req
267. THERE WAS NO HOPE
FOR THAT.Copy !req
268. AWW, NOW KEL'S HEAD
IS ALL MOIST.Copy !req
269. SO... WHO WAS IT?Copy !req
270. YOU KNOW
WHO IT WAS.Copy !req
271. HEY, WHO MOISTENED
KEL'S HEAD?Copy !req
272. PAPA DROPPED HIM
IN THE FISH TANK.Copy !req
273. WELL, THAT WAS
UNCALLED-FOR.Copy !req
274. ENOUGH TALK.Copy !req
275. NOW, EVERYBODY,
JUST EAT LAMB.Copy !req
276. JUST EAT LAMB.Copy !req
277. DON'T REACH
OVER THE TABLE.Copy !req
278. DADDY, CAN I HAVE
SOME LAMB, PLEASE?Copy !req
279. YES, YES, YES.Copy !req
280. THANK YOU.Copy !req
281. THAT'S IT!Copy !req
282. WHOA! POP,
LET ME HANDLE THIS.Copy !req
283. THEN HANDLE IT.Copy !req
284. KENAN.
HEY, KENAN.Copy !req
285. KEL, YOU GOT
TO GO, MAN.Copy !req
286. OH, BUT I'M
LONESOME.Copy !req
287. I KNOW.
I MISS YOU, TOO.Copy !req
288. MY POP IS FURIOUS
WITH YOU RIGHT NOW.Copy !req
289. OK, BUT WHAT
AM I GOING TO DO?Copy !req
290. WRITE HIM A NOTE.Copy !req
291. A NOTE?Copy !req
292. YEAH, YEAH.
APOLOGIZING.Copy !req
293. BUT—BUT—OK,
I'LL WRITE ONE
RIGHT NOW.Copy !req
294. NO, NO. WAIT.Copy !req
295. WAIT TILL HE'S CALMED DOWN.
COME BACK LATER.Copy !req
296. OK, BUT—WAIT!Copy !req
297. JUST DO IT.Copy !req
298. WELL?Copy !req
299. I TOLD HIM
TO GO HOME.Copy !req
300. GOOD. GOOD.Copy !req
301. YOU KNOW, I THINK
YOU NEED TO BECopy !req
302. A LITTLE BIT MORE
PATIENT WITH KEL.Copy !req
303. YEAH. HE IS
MY ONLY FRIEND.Copy !req
304. DO YOU WANT ME
TO HAVE A HEART ATTACK?Copy !req
305. I'M THE ONE THAT MAKES
THE MONEY IN THIS FAMILY.Copy !req
306. I HAVE TO STAY ALIVE.Copy !req
307. THE IMPORTANT THING IS THAT
I DON'T HAVE A HEART ATTACK
IN THIS HOUSE!Copy !req
308. YOU UNDERSTAND?
HE'S A CRAZY KID!Copy !req
309. I DON'T WANT HIM
HERE AGAIN—Copy !req
310. UHH!Copy !req
311. THERE YOU ARE.
HERE'S YOUR CHANGE.Copy !req
312. ENJOY
THE FISH STICKS.Copy !req
313. ALL RIGHT.
SEE YOU LATER.Copy !req
314. HUP! UGH!Copy !req
315. RIGBY'S.Copy !req
316. UH, NO. THERE'S NO
WINONA HERE, BROTHER.Copy !req
317. NO. THIS IS NOT
WINONA, MAN.Copy !req
318. WRONG NUMBER. ALL RIGHT.Copy !req
319. RIGBY'S.Copy !req
320. MAN, WHAT DID I
JUST TELL YOU?Copy !req
321. WRONG DIGITS. YEAH.
THERE'S NO WINONA HERE.Copy !req
322. NO, NO. NO WINONA.Copy !req
323. HELLO?Copy !req
324. YEAH, THIS IS WINONA.
MM-HMM, BUT I CAN'T TALK NOWCopy !req
325. BECAUSE I JUST FELL DOWN
A WHOLE BUNCH OF STAIRS AND
BRUISED MY REAR END, CHILD.Copy !req
326. MM-HMM. IT'S ALL BLACK
AND BLUE AND PURPLE.Copy !req
327. YEAH. OH, OK,
WELL, HURRY ON OVER,Copy !req
328. AND BRING A BIG OLD BAG OF ICE
FOR MY BRUISED BUTTOCKS.Copy !req
329. YEAH. HURRY UP BEFORE
IT SWELLS ALL UP
LIKE A BEACHBALL.Copy !req
330. OK. THANK YOU, BABY.
BYE-BYE.Copy !req
331. HEY, KENAN.Copy !req
332. HEY, CHRIS.
WHO'S THIS?Copy !req
333. THIS IS
MY COUSIN WINONA.Copy !req
334. WELL, HELLO, WINONA.Copy !req
335. IT'S NICE
TO MEET YOU.Copy !req
336. NICE TO
MEET YOU, TOO.Copy !req
337. LISTEN, WINONA
IS EXPECTING A VERY
IMPORTANT PHONE CALL.Copy !req
338. YES. HAS ANYONE
CALLED HERE FOR ME?Copy !req
339. UH... NOPE.Copy !req
340. RIGHT.Copy !req
341. WELL, CHRIS,
I CAN'T WAIT ANY LONGER.Copy !req
342. I'LL SEE YOU LATER.Copy !req
343. OK. BYE, COZ.Copy !req
344. HEY, KEL.Copy !req
345. AW, KEL,
DON'T LOOK SO UPSET.
IT'S NOT THAT BAD.Copy !req
346. YES, IT IS.Copy !req
347. WHAT'S THE MATTER?Copy !req
348. KEL'S ALL UPSET
BECAUSE MY DADDY SAIDCopy !req
349. THAT HE'S NO LONGER
ALLOWED IN OUR HOUSE.Copy !req
350. YEAH. HE SAID I WAS
NOTHING BUT TROUBLECopy !req
351. AND THAT I WAS NEVER ALLOWED
INTO HIS HOUSE AGAIN.Copy !req
352. CAN YOU BELIEVE THAT?Copy !req
353. YES.Copy !req
354. HAVE YOU TRIED
APOLOGIZING TO HIM?Copy !req
355. HOW? HE WON'T EVEN
LET ME IN HIS HOUSE.Copy !req
356. THAT'S IT!Copy !req
357. WHAT?Copy !req
358. SORRY.Copy !req
359. TONIGHT, MY MAMA AND
DADDY ARE HAVING DINNER
AT THE PORK SHACK.Copy !req
360. SO?Copy !req
361. SO WE'LL GO THERE,Copy !req
362. WHERE HE CAN'T
KICK YOU OUT.Copy !req
363. THAT WAY, YOU CAN
APOLOGIZE TO HIM.Copy !req
364. NO. I'M FRIGHTENED.Copy !req
365. WHY?Copy !req
366. BECAUSE YOUR DADDY'S
BIG, MEAN,
AND BALDHEADED.Copy !req
367. YOU EVER WANT
TO COME HANG OUT
AT MY HOUSE AGAIN?Copy !req
368. I'VE GOT TO.Copy !req
369. WELL, THEN,
LET'S GO SEE MY DADDY.Copy !req
370. AW, HE'LL HARM ME.Copy !req
371. HA HA HA!
MY DADDY'S NOT
GOING TO HARM YOU.Copy !req
372. HEY, CHRIS, LET ME BORROW
THE FIRST-AID KIT.Copy !req
373. AND WE ALSO HAVE
THE PORK CHOP,Copy !req
374. THE PORK RIBS,
THE DOUBLE BACON COMBO.Copy !req
375. OR YOU MAY WISH TO TRY
TONIGHT'S SPECIAL,Copy !req
376. WHICH THE CHEF CALLS
"HAM, HAM, HAM."Copy !req
377. OOH, IT ALL SOUNDS
PORKALICIOUS.Copy !req
378. I KNOW WHAT I'M HAVING.Copy !req
379. I'LL HAVE THE
"HAM, HAM, HAM" SPECIAL.Copy !req
380. AND I'LL HAVE
THE SAUSAGE
WRAPPED IN BACON.Copy !req
381. PIG IN A PORK.
VERY GOOD.Copy !req
382. I'LL BE RIGHT BACK
TO START YOU OFFCopy !req
383. WITH TWO BOWLS
OF HOT PORK CHOWDER.Copy !req
384. WHOA!Copy !req
385. WE'RE GOING TO
PIG OUT TONIGHT,
AREN'T WE?Copy !req
386. I LOVE IT, LOVE IT.Copy !req
387. HEY, MOM.
HEY, DAD.Copy !req
388. KENAN, WHAT ARE
YOU DOING HERE?Copy !req
389. WELL, I WAS ON MY WAY
HOME FROM WORK,Copy !req
390. AND I THOUGHT I'D STOP BY
AND SAY HEY.Copy !req
391. GOOD. SIT DOWN.Copy !req
392. YOU WANT TO HAVE
SOME PORK MEAT?Copy !req
393. NO, THANKS.Copy !req
394. ACTUALLY, POP, I WAS
WONDERING IF YOU WAS
IN THE MOOD TO TALK.Copy !req
395. WELL, SURE, SON.
WHAT DO YOU WANT
TO TALK ABOUT?Copy !req
396. ACTUALLY, I DON'T NEED
TO SPEAK TO YOU MYSELF,
BUT, UH—PSST!Copy !req
397. NO! NO!
GET THAT DEMON
OUT OF HERE!Copy !req
398. BUT, POP—Copy !req
399. I TOLD YOU,
THAT HOOLIGAN IS NOT
ALLOWED IN MY HOUSE!Copy !req
400. YOU HAVE NO RIGHT
TO THROW KEL OUT
OF THIS RESTAURANT.Copy !req
401. EVERYONE IS WELCOME
AT THE PORK SHACK.Copy !req
402. WELCOME AT
THE PORK SHACK.Copy !req
403. JUST LISTEN
TO WHAT THE BOY
HAS TO SAY.Copy !req
404. HEY, MR. ROCKMORE.
HOW YOU DOING?Copy !req
405. HOW AM I DOING?
I'LL TELL YOU
HOW I'M DOING.Copy !req
406. BECAUSE OF YOU,
I'VE GOT A TWISTED SPINE,Copy !req
407. A FRACTURED ARM,
AND A CONTUSION
ON MY FOREHEAD.Copy !req
408. WELL, I HAVE
A BROKEN HEART.Copy !req
409. A BROKEN HEART.Copy !req
410. AW, COME ON, POP.
KEL IS SORRY.
BE HIS FRIEND AGAIN.Copy !req
411. I WAS NEVER HIS FRIEND.Copy !req
412. ROGER!Copy !req
413. COME ON, MR. ROCKMORE.
LOOK, I PROMISE I'LL BE
MORE CAREFUL.Copy !req
414. NO MORE ACCIDENTS. PLEASE?
NO MORE ACCIDENTS.Copy !req
415. WHAT DO YOU SAY?Copy !req
416. ROGER...Copy !req
417. WELL, I SUPPOSE,
IF KEL PROMISES
HE'LL BE MORE CAREFUL...Copy !req
418. HERE WE ARE—
TWO BOWLS OF HOT PORK CHOWDER.Copy !req
419. I'M GOING TO
START RIGHT NOW.
LET ME HELP.Copy !req
420. WHOO, THIS IS HOT!Copy !req
421. AAH!Copy !req
422. HOT CHOWDER!
HOT CHOWDER!Copy !req
423. LET ME WIPE IT OFF!Copy !req
424. NO! NO! AAH!Copy !req
425. CANCEL
THE "HAM, HAM, HAM."Copy !req
426. AND THEN, THE BIG OLD
INSANE MONSTER BROKE OUT
OF HIS CHAINSCopy !req
427. AND CHASED MR. MONKEY
DOWN INTO THE BASEMENT.Copy !req
428. IT WAS DARK, DAMP,
AND MOIST.Copy !req
429. LISTEN!Copy !req
430. THEN ALL OF A SUDDEN,
WHEN MR. MONKEY'S BACK
WAS TURNED—Copy !req
431. AAH! AAH!Copy !req
432. HEY, KENAN,
WHAT YOU DOING?Copy !req
433. HAVING A HEART ATTACK,
THAT'S WHAT I'M DOING.Copy !req
434. YOU ABOUT MADE ME
WET MY P.J.'s.Copy !req
435. WHY DID YOU SNEAK
THROUGH MY WINDOW?Copy !req
436. SO I WOULDN'T RUN
INTO YOUR DADDY.Copy !req
437. YOU THINK HE'S
STILL MAD AT ME?Copy !req
438. OH, NO, KEL.Copy !req
439. SURE, HE WAS MAD
AT YOU WHEN YOU
SNAPPED HIS BACKCopy !req
440. AND PUSHED HIM
INTO TRAFFIC
AND BROKE HIS ARMCopy !req
441. AND THEN HIT HIM
IN THE HEAD
WITH A ROCK,Copy !req
442. BUT I'M SURE
IT JUST SMOOTHED
THINGS OVERCopy !req
443. WHEN YOU POURED
HOT PORK CHOWDER
IN HIS LAPCopy !req
444. AND SHOVED HIM
OUT THE WINDOW.Copy !req
445. WELL, I KNOW HOW
TO MAKE IT UP TO HIM.Copy !req
446. I BROUGHT HIM
HIS FAVORITE CANDY,Copy !req
447. A FLOWER, AND A
HANDWRITTEN APOLOGY,Copy !req
448. BUT YOU HAVE
TO GIVE IT TO HIM.Copy !req
449. UH-UH.Copy !req
450. IT DOESN'T
MEAN ANYTHING
COMING FROM ME.Copy !req
451. YOU'RE GOING
TO HAVE TO GIVE HIM
THE STUFF YOURSELF.Copy !req
452. BUT, KENAN,
I'M SCARED.Copy !req
453. WHY?Copy !req
454. BECAUSE HE CALLED ME A ZIT.
WHAT IF HE POPS ME?Copy !req
455. HE'S NOT GOING
TO POP YOU.
THAT'S ILLEGAL.Copy !req
456. KENAN...Copy !req
457. ALL RIGHT.
IF YOU'RE SO AFRAID
TO FACE MY FATHER,Copy !req
458. JUST LEAVE IT
SOMEWHERE WHERE
HE CAN FIND IT.Copy !req
459. OK. WHERE?Copy !req
460. YOU CAN LEAVE IT IN
MY PARENTS' BEDROOM.Copy !req
461. WHERE ARE
YOUR PARENTS NOW?Copy !req
462. DOWNSTAIRS WATCHING TV.
COME ON. LET'S GO.Copy !req
463. WOW. I'VE NEVER SEEN
YOUR PARENTS' ROOM BEFORE.Copy !req
464. YOU BETTER HURRY UP
BECAUSE IF MY DADDY
CATCHES YOU IN HERE,Copy !req
465. THIS IS GOING TO BE
THE LAST ROOM
YOU'LL SEE.Copy !req
466. I'M JUST GOING
TO PUT IT ON THE PILLOW.
THEN WE CAN LEAVE.Copy !req
467. JUST DO IT!Copy !req
468. SHH.
SHH.Copy !req
469. HEY, WHICH ONE IS
YOUR DADDY'S PILLOW?Copy !req
470. COME ON, ROGER.
LET'S GET TO BED.Copy !req
471. I'M COMING.
I'M COMING.Copy !req
472. MY DADDY'S
COMING!Copy !req
473. WHOO, I AM SO TIRED.Copy !req
474. ME, TOO.Copy !req
475. WHAT A DAY.Copy !req
476. TELL ME ABOUT IT.Copy !req
477. IF I EVER SEE
THAT KEL AGAIN,Copy !req
478. I'M GOING TO BEAT
HIS BEHIND LIKE—Copy !req
479. ALL RIGHT, ROGER.
GO BRUSH YOUR TEETH.Copy !req
480. YES, DEAR.Copy !req
481. THANK YOU.Copy !req
482. WHOO. WELL, I'M GOING
TO GET UNDRESSED.Copy !req
483. OK.Copy !req
484. ROGER?Copy !req
485. YES, DEAR?Copy !req
486. I'M GOING DOWNSTAIRS
TO GET SOME JUICE.Copy !req
487. OKEY-DOKEY.Copy !req
488. AW, MAN, LET'S
GET OUT OF HERE.Copy !req
489. NO. NOT UNTIL
YOU LEAVE THAT STUFF
ON MY DADDY'S PILLOW.Copy !req
490. AAH!Copy !req
491. OOPS!Copy !req
492. OH, OH, OH.Copy !req
493. WHY DID KEL HAVE TO THROW
THAT ROCK AT MY HEAD?Copy !req
494. HONEY? I THOUGHT YOU WENT
TO GET SOME JUICE.Copy !req
495. I'M GLAD YOU'RE BACK.Copy !req
496. IT'S BEEN
A BAD WEEK, CHERYL.Copy !req
497. ALL I WANT TO DO
IS JUST GET SOME SLEEP.Copy !req
498. GOOD NIGHT, BABY.Copy !req
499. CHERYL?Copy !req
500. CHERYL?Copy !req
501. CHERYL?Copy !req
502. YES?Copy !req
503. WHAT THE—Copy !req
504. KEL!Copy !req
505. OH, MY!
WHAT'S GOING ON?Copy !req
506. HEY, MAMA.
HEY, DADDY.Copy !req
507. GOOD NIGHT.Copy !req
508. KEL! KEL!Copy !req
509. I BROUGHT YOU A FLOWER!
A FLOWER! A FLOWER!Copy !req
510. AAH! AAH! AAH!Copy !req
511. AAH!Copy !req
512. CHERYL,
I'LL SEE YOU LATER.Copy !req
513. WHERE ARE YOU GOING?Copy !req
514. AFTER KEL!Copy !req
515. NO! NO!Copy !req
516. AAH!Copy !req
517. OOH...Copy !req
518. I WAS EXCITED.Copy !req
519. THANK YOU
VERY MUCH, Y'ALL.Copy !req
520. WE JUST WANT
TO KNOW ONE THING.Copy !req
521. DID YOU ENJOY THE SHOW?Copy !req
522. WELL, THANK YOU
VERY MUCH.Copy !req
523. ALL RIGHT!Copy !req
524. CHILL IT. WHOO!Copy !req
525. WAIT A MINUTE.Copy !req
526. HOW WE GOING TO DO
THE SHOW NEXT WEEKCopy !req
527. WITH YOUR DADDY KICKING ME
OUT OF THE HOUSE AND ALL?Copy !req
528. I DIDN'T TELL YOU?Copy !req
529. WHEN MY POP JUMPED
OUT THE WINDOW
AFTER YOU,Copy !req
530. HE HIT HIS HEAD
AGAINST A TREE
SO HARDCopy !req
531. THAT HE FORGOT
THIS WHOLE EPISODE.Copy !req
532. WHOO!Copy !req
533. BOY, THAT'S CONVENIENT!
HA HA HA!Copy !req
534. AIN'T IT, THOUGH?Copy !req
535. NOW, COME ON, KEL.Copy !req
536. WHERE WE GOING?Copy !req
537. TO THE CEMETERY.Copy !req
538. WHY WE GOING
TO THE CEMETERY?Copy !req
539. YOU'LL SEE.
GRAB TWO SHOVELS
AND SOME COCONUTSCopy !req
540. AND FOLLOW ME,
SNOW PEA.Copy !req
541. YO! COME ON!Copy !req
542. UH, KENAN,
WHY YOU CALLING ME A SNOW PEA?Copy !req
543. I'M NOT A CHINESE VEGETABLE!Copy !req
544. KENAN! WHY WE GOING
TO THE CEMETERY?Copy !req
545. THAT'S NOT COOL.
THAT'S NOT NORMAL!Copy !req
546. KENAN!Copy !req
547. KENAN!Copy !req
548. AWW!Copy !req
549. AWW, HERE IT GOES!Copy !req
550. WHY?Copy !req
551. KENAN & KEL WAS RECORDED
IN FRONT OF A LIVE AUDIENCECopy !req
552. AT NICKELODEON STUDIOS
IN ORLANDOCopy !req
553. AT UNIVERSAL STUDIOS,
FLORIDA.Copy !req