1. Relationship advice, huh?Copy !req
2. Yes! Right now,
I'm facing a major problem!Copy !req
3. I thought only you, the Love Master,
would be able to solve this issue!Copy !req
4. The ship has already sailed!Copy !req
5. I'll see your voyage through to the end!Copy !req
6. President!Copy !req
7. Here we go again.Copy !req
8. I'm at the end of my rope
for this charade!Copy !req
9. How could I ever be thought of
as the Love Master?Copy !req
10. How did I qualify for that title?Copy !req
11. If a virgin can qualify,
I'll get it sooner or later!Copy !req
12. The idea of me giving
girlfriend advice is ridiculous!Copy !req
13. Please, make this an easy one!Copy !req
14. That's Miss Kashiwagi's boyfriend.Copy !req
15. I thought things were going well with them
doing the charity work together.Copy !req
16. So, what's the problem?Copy !req
17. Right. Actually...Copy !req
18. I want to hold
Miss Kashiwagi's hand!Copy !req
19. We've been dating for a month now,
so I'd like to do something romantic.Copy !req
20. That's why I want your advice
on what I should do to hold hands with her!Copy !req
21. Why don't you ask a friend for advice?Copy !req
22. Isn't this just bragging?Copy !req
23. Did he come to brag,
pretending he wants advice?Copy !req
24. The president has a big heart,
but I'm sure even he'll get mad at—Copy !req
25. Oh, that.Copy !req
26. The face of a Buddha?Copy !req
27. He brought up something normal.Copy !req
28. Even I can advise about holding hands.
I can handle the ABCs of love.Copy !req
29. The ABCs of love!Copy !req
30. Of the many kinds of couples,Copy !req
31. the meaning between them differs
depending upon the depth of the relationship.Copy !req
32. The ABCs are one barometer
to measure that depth.Copy !req
33. A is kissing. B is petting.Copy !req
34. C indicates a relationship
that has gone all the way.Copy !req
35. This boyfriend is a beginner who decided
to begin climbing the ABC mountain.Copy !req
36. The stage he is at differs little
from fellow virgin, Shirogane.Copy !req
37. Listen. Holding hands is simple.Copy !req
38. Rent a cruiser, and as you gaze
at the sun sinking below the horizon,Copy !req
39. let your fingertips accidentally
on purpose brush up against hers.Copy !req
40. When she looks embarrassed,
smile and take her hand.Copy !req
41. That's a tall order!Copy !req
42. But that's okay.Copy !req
43. I guess that's the kind of person
the president is!Copy !req
44. I-I don't have the money to rent a cruiser.Copy !req
45. I see.Copy !req
46. Then,Copy !req
47. get a part-time job!Copy !req
48. A job?Copy !req
49. I recommend it.Copy !req
50. You work up a sweat. I swear, afterwards,
the taste of the water from the fountain...Copy !req
51. is as good as cola! I guarantee it!Copy !req
52. Why not just drink cola?Copy !req
53. The president's workaholism
might be coloring this argument.Copy !req
54. I'm not saying you need
to rent a luxury liner.Copy !req
55. Right.Copy !req
56. You can rent a small one
for 10,000 or 20,000 yen.Copy !req
57. But you need to have a license
to pilot a boat, don't you?Copy !req
58. A small boat license is good enough.Copy !req
59. It's easy to get, so I recommend it.Copy !req
60. He's got one!Copy !req
61. W-Wow! I'm impressed, President!Copy !req
62. You can get one by taking a three-day course,
and it costs less than 100,000 yen.Copy !req
63. But 100,000 yen is a lot of money to me.Copy !req
64. So get a job!Copy !req
65. Why do you try to keep pushing him
into the workforce?Copy !req
66. Certainly, you're describing a great situation,
but I've got a fundamental problem.Copy !req
67. My hands get all sweaty
when I'm nervous.Copy !req
68. I'm afraid to take Miss Kashiwagi's hand
when mine is slick with sweat.Copy !req
69. In other words...Copy !req
70. you have palmar hyperhidrosis!Copy !req
71. I don't know what that is,
but you're probably right!Copy !req
72. Don't make a diagnosis
before seeing a doctor!Copy !req
73. That would require surgery.Copy !req
74. Surgery for hyperhidrosis
runs about 100,000 yen!Copy !req
75. Get a job! Okay?Copy !req
76. Why are you obsessed
with making him work?Copy !req
77. Wouldn't it be more constructive...Copy !req
78. to have a sweaty forehead from work
than sweaty hands?Copy !req
79. That was a pretty good line!Copy !req
80. That decides it.Copy !req
81. For holding hands,
a part-time job is essential!Copy !req
82. Wrong! It isn't essential at all!Copy !req
83. As it happens, the place where I work
is looking for people for summer vacation.Copy !req
84. Shall I inquire on your behalf?Copy !req
85. President...Copy !req
86. Don't worry. I'd be with you.Copy !req
87. It's physical labor. It's tough at first.Copy !req
88. I'd be there every step of the way.Copy !req
89. Please, realize your basic mistake!Copy !req
90. President!Copy !req
91. The cost of the boat, license and surgery...
We're looking at about 200,000 yen.Copy !req
92. The job pays 1,000 yen an hour,
so 5,000 yen for a five-hour shift.Copy !req
93. If you work 40 days,
you should be able to swing it.Copy !req
94. You'll have a fun summer vacation!Copy !req
95. I suppose so.Copy !req
96. This is bad.Copy !req
97. At this rate, the president's summer vacation
will be consumed by working!Copy !req
98. After my trouble coming up
with summer vacation plans!Copy !req
99. They'll all be ruined!Copy !req
100. - I'll arrange an interview—
- Hold it!Copy !req
101. The color of her magnifying glass is pink!Copy !req
102. That's the color of truth!Copy !req
103. Enter the Love Detective!Copy !req
104. Fujiwara and Shinomiya?Copy !req
105. I'm not gonna let you
talk about love without me!Copy !req
106. Shinomiya...Copy !req
107. I'm not part of this!Copy !req
108. I'm not a fool!Copy !req
109. It seems you're together.Copy !req
110. So, what's the matter at hand?Copy !req
111. Yes, the question was
how he can hold his girlfriend's hand.Copy !req
112. I see.Copy !req
113. Huh? Can't he just normally
take her by the hand?Copy !req
114. What element is gumming up the works?Copy !req
115. Well, the problematic aspect
is a high psychological hurdle.Copy !req
116. Sweaty palms.Copy !req
117. After my love sensor went off...Copy !req
118. Is that the level
of male relationship advice?Copy !req
119. That's cute.Copy !req
120. You say it's nothing to worry about?Copy !req
121. After all, the only advice here
is "Do your best," right?Copy !req
122. "Do your best"? That's so vague.Copy !req
123. It's not vague!Copy !req
124. He's so nervous that his hands
get sweaty which is embarrassing!Copy !req
125. And yet... And yet...Copy !req
126. And yet, he screws up the courage,
takes her hand, and it works out.Copy !req
127. Right?Copy !req
128. It wouldn't be fun if you could
grab her hand without any effort!Copy !req
129. Trying to skip the hard part
is a fundamental mistake!Copy !req
130. Right?Copy !req
131. Reflect on that!Copy !req
132. I-I see.Copy !req
133. I was just lacking in pure will.Copy !req
134. Just trying hard is enough?Copy !req
135. What about the job?Copy !req
136. He doesn't need it!Copy !req
137. I don't believe it.Copy !req
138. I'll do my best!Copy !req
139. Although I've never held hands
with a boy myself.Copy !req
140. Days later...Copy !req
141. On a date with Kashiwagi,Copy !req
142. he somehow succeeded
in holding Kashiwagi's hand.Copy !req
143. At any rate, I'm glad I protected
the president's summer vacation.Copy !req
144. Results of today's match...Copy !req
145. Shirogane loses.Copy !req
146. Maybe Shinomiya could work there?Copy !req
147. No, dream on.Copy !req
148. If he really needs someone
to work there, he should ask me.Copy !req
149. Jeez, club activities suck.Copy !req
150. Wha...Copy !req
151. Club activities are important.Copy !req
152. Dedicating oneself to something
develops the body and mind.Copy !req
153. No, I know
that club activities are important.Copy !req
154. Without them, students would have free time
and go on the path of delinquency.Copy !req
155. Juvie, suspension,
the breakdown of the family.Copy !req
156. MOM
SOB SOBCopy !req
157. In the end, they get pregnant,
and we do a fundraising campaign.Copy !req
158. Club activities are also a way...Copy !req
159. to keep mentally immature children
isolated from all that.Copy !req
160. I didn't say that!Copy !req
161. I mean, yes, there's that aspect to it.Copy !req
162. Club activities!Copy !req
163. Two pyramids exist at Shuchiin Academy.Copy !req
164. One is the parentage pyramid.Copy !req
165. 99% of the students at Shuchiin Academy
come from wealthy families.Copy !req
166. OF A FAMOUS I.T. COMPANYCopy !req
167. Therefore, this is
the ensuing balance of power.Copy !req
168. DOCTORS, PRESIDENTS OF
MEDIUM-SIZED CORPORATIONS,Copy !req
169. It could be called
the "Social Standing Hierarchy."Copy !req
170. GOVERNMENT OFFICIALS,Copy !req
171. And the other pyramid...Copy !req
172. The Club Caste!Copy !req
173. Anyone affiliated with a sports club alone
may be popular,Copy !req
174. regardless of actual performance
during club activities.Copy !req
175. Students who belong to no club
or cultural club members...Copy !req
176. feel negatively about
this unreasonable state of affairs.Copy !req
177. Those who are serious about it
are okay in my book.Copy !req
178. But don't the majority put on "We're serious"
faces while pretending to be best buddies?Copy !req
179. That's a really cold thing.Copy !req
180. It's like, what's fun about that?Copy !req
181. They should do it
as if their lives depended on it!Copy !req
182. I swear...Copy !req
183. I wish they would all die.Copy !req
184. Shoot. Ishigami is off
on one of his anti-youth rants.Copy !req
185. I have to get him back on topic somehow.Copy !req
186. Well, let's put a pin in that.Copy !req
187. About the club budget draft...Copy !req
188. With the recent recession,Copy !req
189. 2019 STUDENT COUNCILCopy !req
190. contributions are down.Copy !req
191. We'll have to cut club budgets
wherever we can.Copy !req
192. I definitely want to hear
your opinion as treasurer.Copy !req
193. Well, let's see.Copy !req
194. Going from my experience
doing accounting for the family business,Copy !req
195. I have to say there's a lot of waste
in this proposed budget.Copy !req
196. We should probably slash
the soccer club's budget.Copy !req
197. Okay, why?Copy !req
198. A lot of the members have girlfriends.Copy !req
199. That's your reason?Copy !req
200. For the same reason, let's reduce the
basketball club and the baseball club's budgets.Copy !req
201. How about a 50,000 yen reduction
for every couple?Copy !req
202. Taxing couples?Copy !req
203. Shouldn't those who are happy
be taxed the most?Copy !req
204. It's a happiness tax.Copy !req
205. Even a tyrant wouldn't tax like that!
That's just a total personal grudge!Copy !req
206. It is a personal grudge,
but is that so bad?Copy !req
207. It is bad! It's really bad!Copy !req
208. You don't understand, President.Copy !req
209. You don't understand my feelings!Copy !req
210. Hey, you don't have a game
this Sunday, do you?Copy !req
211. It's been a while, so let's go somewhere!Copy !req
212. Sorry. We have practice that day.Copy !req
213. Lately all you do is practice!Copy !req
214. Sorry, but the tournament's coming up.Copy !req
215. I know, but...Copy !req
216. Right now,Copy !req
217. I'm putting it all on the line for soccer.Copy !req
218. Tak...Copy !req
219. You burst into tears?Copy !req
220. It's okay with me
that they have girlfriends.Copy !req
221. I'm so used to it that I don't feel
anything about it at this point.Copy !req
222. If you've got a girlfriend, go on a date!Copy !req
223. Why are you even at practice?Copy !req
224. If you've got a precious girlfriend,
what could be more important than her?Copy !req
225. When I have nothing...Copy !req
226. L-Look, you know a lot about computers.Copy !req
227. Everyone says the same thing to otaku.Copy !req
228. Maybe you should join one of those clubs.Copy !req
229. Is it possible to be in a club
and also do student council?Copy !req
230. Well, Shinomiya and Fujiwara do it,Copy !req
231. so it's not impossible.Copy !req
232. I see. What clubs are they in?Copy !req
233. I believe Fujiwara belongs
to the tabletop game club.Copy !req
234. I can imagine her enjoying that.Copy !req
235. Shinomiya is in the Japanese archery club.Copy !req
236. The Japanese archery club?Copy !req
237. That really suits her.Copy !req
238. How do you mean?Copy !req
239. With Japanese archery,Copy !req
240. if you've got breasts, the bowstring
rubs against them when you pull it back.Copy !req
241. But with Shinomiya-senpai's size,
there's no need to worry about that.Copy !req
242. She's like this.Copy !req
243. - Ishigami!
- Just like this.Copy !req
244. Behind you! Behind you!Copy !req
245. Ishigami!Copy !req
246. Ishigami!Copy !req
247. I hear it's possible to bind your boobs
with bandages up to D cup.Copy !req
248. I'm sure Fujiwara-senpai
is way bigger than that,Copy !req
249. so the day she tried Japanese archery,
her chest would be knocked all over the place!Copy !req
250. They'd be like this!Copy !req
251. Like this!Copy !req
252. Hit the brakes, Ishigami!Copy !req
253. Ishigami?Copy !req
254. You're lucky, Ishigami.Copy !req
255. Miss Fujiwara is kind,
so she'll forgive you.Copy !req
256. She's probably the only one
who'd forgive you.Copy !req
257. I'm sure of it.Copy !req
258. President, I'm going home
to write my will.Copy !req
259. S-Sure.Copy !req
260. But don't die.Copy !req
261. It was a life full of liking
big ones and small ones.Copy !req
262. Were you two at your clubs?Copy !req
263. Yes.Copy !req
264. President, please increase
the budget of the tabletop game club.Copy !req
265. I'll give you a cola.Copy !req
266. Don't offer me such an obvious bribe.Copy !req
267. But I've never been in a club,
so I don't know what it's like.Copy !req
268. Really?Copy !req
269. Then, you should join my club.Copy !req
270. No! If I said that,Copy !req
271. it'd be like saying I wanted to be
in the same club as the president!Copy !req
272. I'm not really that...Copy !req
273. Then why don't you try joining my club?Copy !req
274. Tabletop game club, huh?Copy !req
275. President, the budgets for the cultural clubs
haven't changed much.Copy !req
276. If you're there to observe
as a member of student council,Copy !req
277. then logically, the sports clubs have had
the major budget changes.Copy !req
278. No, my club is special!Copy !req
279. We always buy new games,
so it's like a money pit!Copy !req
280. That doesn't endear me.Copy !req
281. My club! Please join my club!Copy !req
282. No!Copy !req
283. You can't, no.Copy !req
284. Well, I don't really have time
to join a club because of my part-time job.Copy !req
285. But I like this situation.
It feels like I'm popular.Copy !req
286. I won't tell them I can't!Copy !req
287. Results of today's match...Copy !req
288. Shirogane wins.Copy !req
289. BECAUSE FOR A SHORT TIME,
HE'S ABLE TO FEEL LIKE HE HAS A HAREMCopy !req
290. I WANNA BE POPULAR.
I WANNA BE POPULAR.Copy !req
291. So, Pesu put Father's shoe
in his mouth and ran off.Copy !req
292. Father chased after him, yelling,
"I'm not bread from Shizuoka Prefecture!"Copy !req
293. I held my sides with laughter!Copy !req
294. I love how you laugh, Miss Kaguya.Copy !req
295. Wh-Where's that coming from?Copy !req
296. After all, a long time ago,
you didn't even crack a smile!Copy !req
297. When we were in middle school,
they called you "Kaguya the Ice Princess."Copy !req
298. It was like you were in your own world.Copy !req
299. I was like that back then, wasn't I?Copy !req
300. After joining the student council, you were
on bad terms with the president for a while.Copy !req
301. Shirogane, would you not look at me?Copy !req
302. You were looking at me first.Copy !req
303. It was as comfortable
as sitting on thorns back then.Copy !req
304. I-It was like that back then, wasn't it?Copy !req
305. I kept my distance from people
because I was afraid.Copy !req
306. Miss Fujiwara was the only one
who stayed by my side despite that.Copy !req
307. I have to treat her better.Copy !req
308. It's my dream to see you
roar with laughter someday!Copy !req
309. I wouldn't let myself
lose control like that.Copy !req
310. That's what you say,Copy !req
311. but I bet you'd laugh
if you saw my Pesu doing tricks.Copy !req
312. It's amazing!Copy !req
313. His wiener!Copy !req
314. Is something wrong, Miss Kaguya?Copy !req
315. I-I understand!
You mean your dog's trick, right?Copy !req
316. Perhaps you balance a hot dog on his nose,
and he waits for a command to eat it.Copy !req
317. I knew it!Copy !req
318. But I was just shocked
to hear the word "wiener"...Copy !req
319. Anyway, he does the normal trick
like putting one or two paws in your hand,Copy !req
320. suddenly coming out of the mouth
of a cute girl like Miss Fujiwara!Copy !req
321. but his wiener is really weird!Copy !req
322. How can I explain it?Copy !req
323. It hangs all the way to the left!Copy !req
324. M-Miss Kaguya?Copy !req
325. Sorry. I choked on my tea.Copy !req
326. Wh-What is this?Copy !req
327. Why am I laughing
when I hear the word "wiener"?Copy !req
328. Dirty jokes!Copy !req
329. After learning from past mistakes,Copy !req
330. Kaguya has begun to study the facts of life.Copy !req
331. HMM HMMCopy !req
332. However,Copy !req
333. regarding slang and metaphors, Kaguya's knowledge
is still at the level of a young grade-schooler.Copy !req
334. But Pesu is sneaky!Copy !req
335. His wiener gets big when there's food,
but otherwise, it's just a tiny stump!Copy !req
336. So, right now,Copy !req
337. Kaguya is at the stage where kids laugh
at words like "wiener" and "boobs"!Copy !req
338. BIGCopy !req
339. BIGCopy !req
340. Everyone goes through this period,
and Kaguya is smack-dab in the middle of it!Copy !req
341. BIGCopy !req
342. Kaguya?Copy !req
343. Stop it already!Copy !req
344. If she realizes I'm laughing
at a vulgar word like that,Copy !req
345. the Shinomiya family
will never live down my shame!Copy !req
346. It's my dream to see you
roar with laughter someday.Copy !req
347. Making Miss Fujiwara's dream come true
with a wiener would just be despicable!Copy !req
348. I have to reset my feelings!Copy !req
349. Are you...Copy !req
350. Wiener.Copy !req
351. Wiener.Copy !req
352. Please! Stop it!Copy !req
353. I'm begging you!Copy !req
354. M-Miss Kaguya is roaring with laughter!Copy !req
355. I'm thrilled!Copy !req
356. Fujiwara's dream came true.Copy !req
357. M-Miss Fujiwara?Copy !req
358. You will stop, won't you?Copy !req
359. Of course she wouldn't stop.Copy !req
360. NICE TO MEET YOU!Copy !req
361. Just as a parent
will continue tickling their child...Copy !req
362. Wiener! Wiener! Wiener! Wiener!Copy !req
363. when the child demands them to stop,Copy !req
364. nothing could make
the overjoyed Fujiwara stop!Copy !req
365. This is fun!Copy !req
366. President?Copy !req
367. Hi.Copy !req
368. President.Copy !req
369. Listen, Miss Fujiwara!
Don't you dare do that in front of a boy!Copy !req
370. She's not going to stop!Copy !req
371. It'll be okay. I'm a young lady.Copy !req
372. I could never say that word
in front of a boy.Copy !req
373. At least not out of my mouth.Copy !req
374. No! There's some hidden meaning
to her words!Copy !req
375. Say, President!Copy !req
376. What do you call that little dog
that looks like a sausage again?Copy !req
377. Dachshund?Copy !req
378. Wiener dog?Copy !req
379. She intends to make
the president say "wiener"!Copy !req
380. If the president says that word,Copy !req
381. I won't be able to keep myself
from laughing!Copy !req
382. I can't let the president say "wiener"!Copy !req
383. But isn't there
another weird expression for it?Copy !req
384. I gotta stop this!Copy !req
385. Think!Copy !req
386. Use all of your brain cells, Kaguya Shinomiya!Copy !req
387. Oh, isn't it "wien"—Copy !req
388. Hot dog!Copy !req
389. I heard that's what they sometimes
call it in the U.S.Copy !req
390. What's that Viennese breaded,
pan-fried cutlet called?Copy !req
391. - Wien—
- Schnitzel.Copy !req
392. It's similar to our tonkatsu.Copy !req
393. What's the common name for a hot dog?Copy !req
394. - Wie—
- Frankfurter!Copy !req
395. The term comes from Frankfurt, Germany,
where sausages like hot dogs originated.Copy !req
396. Um, what else? What else?
I can't think of anything!Copy !req
397. What? What is this about?Copy !req
398. I held the fort!Copy !req
399. Now the president won't say the word "wiener"!Copy !req
400. I'm out of danger!Copy !req
401. Darn it! President, I wanted "wiener"
to come out of your mouth!Copy !req
402. Every time you were about to give me "wiener,"
Miss Kaguya would get in the way!Copy !req
403. P-Perverts!Copy !req
404. I would never do anything like that here!
What in the world are you thinking?Copy !req
405. Are you nymphos?Copy !req
406. Are you nymphomaniacs?Copy !req
407. I...Copy !req
408. I'm not like her!Copy !req
409. Why...Copy !req
410. is this happening?Copy !req
411. Wiener.Copy !req
412. Enough! Stop it already!Copy !req
413. That's too funny!Copy !req
414. I've had enough wieners!Copy !req
415. Miss Fujiwara,
when are you going to be satisfied?Copy !req
416. Stop torturing me with wieners!Copy !req
417. Miss Kaguya, your response
just makes me feel so good.Copy !req
418. S-Something unspeakable
is happening behind this door!Copy !req
419. Why don't we switch?
You take the wiener part!Copy !req
420. No way! You won't see that
come out of my mouth!Copy !req
421. Oh, like you never have before!Copy !req
422. One or two more wieners won't hurt!Copy !req
423. Forget it!Copy !req
424. Wiener!Copy !req
425. Wiener! Wiener!Copy !req
426. Results of today's match...Copy !req
427. Fujiwara wins.Copy !req
428. Wiener!Copy !req
429. Um, do you have one?Copy !req