Joe Pera Talks With You 1x4

Directed by Marty Schousboe

In which Joe Pera attempts to show viewers how to properly dance by yourself at a co-worker's wedding.

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Subtitle languages: English • Spanish • Brazilian Portuguese

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1. Dance communicates something primitive and essential...

2. love...

3. lust...

4. joy...

5. guy bounce.

6. On a wedding dance floor, all of these collide.

7. The atmosphere surrounding the dancers

8. is romantically charged by the ceremony earlier

9. and sexually charged by the Top 40 dance hits.

10. Also, most people are related.

11. It's an environment where anything can happen,

12. and I kind of like to join in.

13. But being dateless at my co-worker's wedding,

14. I'm not sure how to do it in a way

15. that isn't off-putting, threatening, or offensive.

16. Oh, e-excuse me?

17. I-I'm Joe Pera.

18. I just got to tell you, your entrance was amazing.

19. Oh! Thank you.

20. Oh, everybody was great.

21. I know, but that was something special.

22. Help me in welcoming our maid of honor, Angie Kubec,

23. escorted by our best man, Brad Cam!

24. DJ: Keep your hands going.

25. You're a true showman, Brad,

26. like Tom Bergeron.

27. I thought the "I do's were gonna get me choked up.

28. Hey, tell me one thing.

29. Where do we get this tie?

30. Oh. Men's shop in Oden.

31. - Whoo! - But you can have mine.

32. Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no.

33. I'm a lead singer.

34. Hey, listen, I'm grabbing a brewski at the bar,

35. but I want to see you on my dance floor.

36. Give me five.

37. Wow.

38. I find it a little disrespectful —

39. you know, men's earrings.

40. Agree to disagree, John.

41. I know some very decent guys with studs.

42. Uncle John, I'm so glad you came.

43. How you holding up?

44. Oh, your Great Aunt Lynn,

45. she — she would have loved the ceremony.

46. We miss her a lot. Thank you for coming, Joe!

47. I know it was last minute, but I'm glad you're here.

48. Me, too.

49. Whoever did the catering was very good.

50. T-They should be working for Emeril Lagasse.

51. Bill, this is Joe from school.

52. Oh, right, you're the guy that grilled

53. all the sausages in the classroom?

54. - Yes. - Right on.

55. Um, Bill, Janet,

56. I don't know you all that well,

57. but I do know that your marriage

58. is going to be a long and happy one.

59. Your first dance told me so. Oh, thank you.

60. We just kind of went for it and had fun.

61. - Thanks. - Me and John could tell.

62. We may not see eye-to-eye on men's earrings,

63. but we both agreed that in every step,

64. there was rhythm, trust,

65. physical and mental intimacy.

66. You guys are the real deal.

67. And I'm not just saying that

68. because you are one of the few teachers

69. who isn't unhappy to see me.

70. Thanks a lot, Joe.

71. Uh, we're gonna continue making the rounds,

72. but Sarah's over there if you want to say hello.

73. See you later.

74. - Good to see you. - Congrats again.

75. - Thank you. - Yeah, thanks, Joe.

76. I'm sorry I kept asking you

77. why you didn't want to dance.

78. I didn't know.

79. It's okay.

80. All right, John. I'm going.

81. - Hey, Sarah. - Hi.

82. You see anything good out there?

83. Uh, well, those twins.

84. Uh, I saw one of them step on the other one. Oh.

85. And then, um,

86. that guy over there is something else.

87. Oh, that's Brad Cam. He's killing it tonight.

88. Everybody, Conga line!

89. Are you gonna?

90. Uh, no, no. I'm not crazy about crowds.

91. Me, either.

92. You know, um, last week,

93. when we were chaperoning the dance,

94. I was watching all the 7th and 8th graders

95. jumping up and down.

96. I think it's called moshing.

97. Yes.

98. Well, I was realizing how easy it would be

99. for them to take over the school

100. 'cause there's 68 of us staff,

101. 473 kids,

102. with 59 of them large, right? Uh-huh.

103. You know, thank goodness

104. they could only hold it down for three days

105. before the Coast Guard came.

106. Uh, but regardless,

107. it'd still be a huge psychological victory

108. for children everywhere.

109. Do you like the new job, otherwise?

110. Yeah.

111. Oh, here's this.

112. Come on. You're getting in.

113. Let's go!

114. Joe. Shoulders.

115. Ohhhh!

116. Whoo, yeah! Yeah!

117. Get in there!

118. - Whoo! - All right!

119. Whoo!

120. That was amazing.

121. You're so flexible.

122. I've been thinking about something.

123. What's that?

124. Do you think that U.S. AI or Chinese AI

125. will be the first to learn how to dance?

126. Neither.

127. Someday, they'll both be able to move to a beat,

128. b-but they'll never be able to do a move like this.

129. What else won't they know how to do?

130. You sure?

131. Positive.

132. They can't feel it in their loins like we do.

133. Right, because they don't have genitals.

134. Yes.

135. Your turn.

136. - For a move? - Uh-huh.

137. Okay.

138. What's it called?

139. Walking on hot coals.

140. Your turn.

141. Uh, uh, grab the handle bar.

142. Okay.

143. The moves are —

144. Okay.

145. Sorry if this is inappropriate.

146. No, that's okay.

147. - Okay, I'm tired. - Okay. How about this one?

148. What's that?

149. This is the wavy tree.

150. - I like it. - Uh-huh.

151. We're not really known for our dancing abilities

152. in Northern Michigan.

153. I guess that we just don't generate heat

154. from the hips the way, say, um, Miami people do.

155. In a place as cold as here,

156. dancing is more about how solid you can be.

157. And, Sarah — she's solid like a tree stump,

158. like a wooden, little flat-top tree stump.

159. Sorry, John.

160. They don't have rum-raisin today.

161. That's okay.

162. Gus, I'm home.

163. Imagine a world without guys like Brad Cam.

164. A man like Brad Cam can untangle a dance floor,

165. sort out the threads,

166. and give them the confidence to do a dance move

167. they saw on TV 10 years ago.

168. And, um, dance is great.

169. I wish — I wish —

170. I wish I had a copy of "Black Swan" on DVD.

171. I'd watch that whole movie right now.