Jackass 2x6

Directed by

Preston Acuff as Self • Knate Gwaltney as Self • Erik Payne as Self • Dimitry Elyashkevich as Self • Trip Taylor as Self

1. Johnny On Stilts - 2. The Fire Hose - 3. Toilet On Wheels - 4. Stilt Boxing - 5. Escaped Mental Patient - 6. Air Boat - 7. Blindfolded Skateboarding - 8. Human Raft - 9. Slingshot Three - 10. One Legged Man - 11. Blackhead

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Subtitle languages: English • Spanish • Brazilian Portuguese

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1. HI, I'M JOHNNY KNOXVILLE.

2. WELCOME TO "JACKASS."

3. AGH!

4. MOO!

5. AWOO!

6. WHOA!

7. THAT'S BAD-ASS!

8. HI.

9. HOW YOU DOING?

10. GOOD, MY NAME'S JOHNNY.

11. MARK, NICE TO MEET YOU.

12. NICE TO MEET YOU.

13. I'M GONNA BE GETTING SPRAYED.

14. OH, YOU'RE THE ONE.

15. YEAH.

16. OK.

17. HOW MANY POUNDS OF PRESSURE

18. COMES OUT OF THERE.

19. WE'RE LOOKING AT...

20. 325 GALLONS A MINUTE.

21. THAT'S LIKE BEING PUNCHED,

22. YOU KNOW.

23. YEAH.

24. THEY'RE JUST PUNCHING YOU—

25. KEEP PUNCHING YOU.

26. YEAH, IT'S REALLY GONNA

27. ME UP.

28. READY?

29. DO IT.

30. READY!

31. I'M JOHNNY KNOXVILLE, AND I—

32. GET HIM AGAIN!

33. HIT HIM, HIT HIM, HIT HIM!

34. STOP!

35. YOU ALL RIGHT?

36. OH!

37. OH!

38. I TRIED TO SAY STOP A FEW

39. TIMES, BUT YOU GUYS WERE...

40. HE'S GOING, "NO, HE'LL TELL

41. YOU WHEN!"

42. HA HA!

43. HA HA!

44. OH!

45. OH!

46. I'M REALLY...

47. I'VE HAD ALL THE FUN

48. I COULD HAVE AFTER THIS.

49. NOW, THAT WAS FUNNY!

50. COME ON!

51. YOU BIG SISSY!

52. ALL RIGHT!

53. SKATE, SKATE!

54. THAT'S GOOD!

55. HA HA HA!

56. I DIDN'T GET THE CUP!

57. I NEED A CUP!

58. OH,

59. HA HA HA HA!

60. IT'S—I SWEAR TO GOD,

61. IT JUST...

62. IT TOOK MY PENIS AND JUST—

63. I THINK IT MIGHT BE GONE.

64. HI, I'M JOHNNY KNOXVILLE,

65. AND I'M ABOUT TO BE DRAGGED

66. BY A HORSE.

67. WHOA!

68. OH, OH!

69. OW!

70. FALLING ON YOUR STEEL

71. DEATH IN LIFE IS YOUR IDEAL

72. LIFE IS LIKE A WHEEL

73. SUNLIGHT

74. FALLING ON YOUR STEEL

75. DEATH IN LIFE IS YOUR IDEAL

76. DUDE, I JUST GOT DRUG

77. IN.

78. IN THE CORNER TO MY LEFT

79. WEARING THE PINK STRIPES,

80. MAKE THAT BLUE WITH

81. PINK TROUSERS...

82. THE ONE THAT MAKES THE GIRLS SAY

83. "OH," STEVE-O!

84. WHOO!

85. KICK HIS ASS!

86. IN THE CORNER TO MY RIGHT

87. WHERE THERE'S NO CORNER AT ALL,

88. WEARING THE RED TRUNKS

89. AND THE OLD-ASS SHOES,

90. RYAN "I'M OVER" DUNN!

91. LET'S GET READY TO TUMBLE!

92. LET'S GO, STEVE-O!

93. LET'S GO, DUNN!

94. KICK HIS ASS!

95. COME ON!

96. COME ON!

97. GIVE HIM A LITTLE PEP.

98. A LITTLE PEP!

99. JUST STAY UP, STAY UP.

100. YOU GOT HIM.

101. YOU'VE GOT HIM.

102. WATCH THAT!

103. WATCH THAT!

104. OH!

105. YEAH!

106. YEAH, DUNN!

107. WHOO!

108. YOU GONNA TAKE THAT LIKE A

109. MAN ON STILTS?

110. STEVE-O, YOU'RE GOING DOWN!

111. COME ON, COME ON.

112. YOU'RE GOING DOWN, STEVE-O!

113. OH!

114. POP HIM, DON'T LEAVE HIM!

115. THERE WE GO!

116. WIND UP, WIND UP!

117. OH, OH!

118. OH!

119. BRING IT IN HERE,

120. BRING IT IN HERE, FELLOWS.

121. COME ON.

122. I WANT THIS FIGHT CLEAN,

123. THAT MEANS DON'T BE LIKE HIS

124. EX-GIRLFRIEND, AND COME OUT

125. SWINGING.

126. GO!

127. OH!

128. OH!

129. OH!

130. OH!

131. YEAH!

132. ALL RIGHT!

133. LET'S GET HIM UP.

134. LET'S GET HIM UP.

135. NAH, THAT'S IT.

136. IT'S COOL.

137. FIGHT!

138. WHY DOES MY

139. TASTE LIKE YOUR GIRLFRIEND'S

140. CHAPSTICK?

141. WATCH THE LEFT, DUNN!

142. WHOA, HE'S ON HIS BACK—

143. MESS HIM UP!

144. HE'S ON—

145. YEAH!

146. OH!

147. OH!

148. OW!

149. OH!

150. I THINK DUNN MAY HAVE TOOK HIM

151. IN THAT ONE.

152. I THINK THAT ROUND WAS FOR

153. DUNN.

154. DUNN.

155. DUNN.

156. EACH FIGHTER HAS FALLEN ONCE

157. AND TOGETHER IN THE FIRST ROUND

158. FELL SIMULTANEOUSLY.

159. OUR CAMERAS COULDN'T EVEN DETECT

160. WHO FELL FIRST.

161. ROUND 4, KEEP IT CLEAN.

162. NO GRABBING, NO BUTTER,

163. NO BLOWING.

164. COME ON, LET'S GO.

165. YOU'RE DAD'S GOT A BIG

166. PACKAGE.

167. COME ON, STEVE-O,

168. BEAT HIM DOWN!

169. COME ON!

170. YEAH!

171. OH!

172. OH, OH, OH, OH!

173. KICK HIS ASS!

174. COME ON.

175. COME ON, STEVE-O!

176. OH!

177. OH!

178. STEVE-O.

179. STEVE-O!

180. STEVE-O!

181. STEVE-O!

182. STEVE-O!

183. YOU ALL RIGHT?

184. YOU PUNCHED ME IN THE NUT

185. ON THE WAY DOWN!

186. HA HA HA!

187. THAT WAS A TACKLE,

188. THAT WAS NOT A PUNCH.

189. WHO DO YOU THINK WON?

190. I SAY STEVE-O WON.

191. DUNN WON FOR SURE.

192. DUNN WON.

193. DUNN.

194. STEVE-O.

195. I DON'T LIKE THAT MAN.

196. HE LOST.

197. HA HA HA.

198. STEVE-O, STEVE-O, STEVE-O.

199. DUNN WON THE FIGHT.

200. HE KICKED HIS ASS.

201. STEVE-O TACKLED HIM

202. AS A LAST ACT OF A DESPERATE

203. MAN.

204. THE WINNER...

205. AND STILL BOXING—

206. BOO!

207. UM, HOW WOULD I GET TO 322?

208. I NEED TO GET TO 95.

209. YO!

210. DEBBIE, GET IN THE CAR!

211. YO, YO!

212. HE GOT OUT!

213. YO, YO, WE GOT A BOGEY!|||||||||

214. TODAY, BRANDON AND I ARE

215. GONNA BE ORDERLIES...

216. AND TRANSPORT MR. MARGERA TO

217. ANOTHER MENTAL INSTITUTION.

218. THE ONE HE'S AT IS JUST NOT

219. WORKING OUT.

220. WE SHOULD...

221. OH!

222. NO!

223. NO!

224. GET BACK THERE.

225. GET IN THERE, YOU SON OF A

226. BITCH, GET IN THERE.

227. I'M NOT GOING BACK THERE.

228. PUSH ON HIS GOODS!

229. OH, HE'S GOTTEN OUT!

230. YO!

231. WHAT THE HELL?

232. HE'S SLIPPERY.

233. IN THERE!

234. EXCUSE ME.

235. THIS IS 202, RIGHT?

236. YES, IT IS.

237. UM, HOW WOULD I GET TO 322?

238. I NEED TO GET TO 95.

239. YO!

240. GET IN THE CAR!

241. YO, YO, HE GOT OUT!

242. YO, YO, WE GOT A BOGEY!

243. WHOA, WHOA, WHOA!

244. GET HIM, GET HIM!

245. HEY!

246. GET HIM, GET HIM!

247. COME ON, COME ON!

248. EXCUSE ME.

249. HOW WOULD I GET TO 202 SOUTH?

250. THAT'S 202 NORTH,

251. AND THE OTHER SIDE IS 202 SOUTH.

252. HEY!

253. HEY, GET BACK HERE!

254. HEY, HE GOT—

255. YO!

256. YO, YO, PULL THE VAN AROUND!

257. YOU CAN'T DO THAT!

258. I THOUGHT HE WAS RUNNING FROM

259. SOMEONE.

260. I SAW HIM IN THE

261. STRAIGHTJACKET, AND I'M LIKE,

262. "HE'S ESCAPING FROM THE THING."

263. SO, YOU CAUGHT HIM?

264. YEAH.

265. I JUST WANTED EVERYONE TO KNOW

266. THAT, LIKE, NOT TO BE ALARMED.

267. THEY, THEY PUT HIM BACK IN THE

268. VAN, AND THEY TOOK HIM OFF.

269. I'M DANGER AARON,

270. AND THIS IS BLINDFOLDED

271. SKATEBOARDING.

272. ALL RIGHT, GO.

273. OH!

274. DUDE, YOU GOTTA BARGE IT!

275. YEAH, PUT THE SPEED ON THAT,

276. MAN!

277. WHERE'S MY BOARD?

278. TURN AROUND.

279. GET ON THE GROUND

280. AND LOOK FOR IT.

281. THE OTHER WAY.

282. GET ON YOUR KNEES, STOP.

283. GET DOWN.

284. TURN AROUND THE OTHER WAY.

285. STOP.

286. NOW CRAWL.

287. THERE YOU GO.

288. HERE.

289. JUST PUSH STRAIGHT FROM THERE.

290. DON'T GO LEFT, DON'T GO RIGHT.

291. JUST GO STRAIGHT, OK.

292. YOU READY?

293. YEAH.

294. OH!

295. ARE YOU OK?

296. OH,

297. SHOULD I TRY AN OLLIE?

298. YEAH!

299. YEAH.

300. OH!

301. OH!

302. I'M GONNA DROP IN ON HIS RAMP

303. THAT HAS 4 FEET OF VERT.

304. YOU ALL RIGHT?

305. OH, MY GOD!

306. YOU OK?

307. YOU ALL RIGHT?

308. MY HAND'S TWITCH.

309. MY HAND'S TWITCHING.

310. LOOK.

311. YOU DOING THAT ON PURPOSE?

312. NO, IT'S JUST LIKE THE NERVES

313. IN MY HAND LIKE GOT SLAMMED ON.

314. THE DOG WILL LICK IT.

315. IT'S GOTTA HURT.

316. ALL RIGHT, YOU KIDS,

317. DON'T TRY THAT AT HOME, OK?

318. WE WON'T.

319. AND DON'T TRY IT HERE EITHER.

320. LIKE I SAID—

321. WHAT DO I SAY EVERY TIME?

322. SAFETY FIRST.

323. SAFETY FIRST.

324. REMEMBER THAT.

325. AND ALWAYS WEAR PROTECTION.

326. I WANT YOU TO PUNCH ME IN THE

327. FACE ONE SECOND PRIOR TO TAKEOFF

328. SO IT SOFTENS THE BLOW.

329. IN THE MIX

330. DOWN 20 MILES THROUGH THE STICKS

331. TO THE CLOUDY TOWN OF HELLVIEW

332. POPULATION 96

333. EXCESSIVE VACANCY

334. WELL MAYBE

335. IN THE SHADOW OF AN EYE

336. ALL THE STRANGERS PASSING

337. THROUGH

338. AND WHERE THE RULES

339. ME!

340. LEFT TURN A STORE

341. BUT ON THE RIGHT

342. STAY FREE FROM SIGHT

343. 'CAUSE 96 QUITE BITTER BEINGS

344. LIKE TO STACK THE BODIES HIGH

345. THE ONLY WAY TO EVER LEAVE IS

346. OVER-FLOODED BY THE STORM

347. AND ENTANGLEMENT IN HELLVIEW

348. ALL THE TOURISTS

349. THE CAUSE

350. TO LEAVE THE BLOOD

351. OW,

352. WHERE, IN HIS GUT?

353. HE'S ALL RIGHT.

354. I'M JACKASS.

355. AND YOU'RE WATCHING

356. RAAB HIMSELF.

357. I'M RYAN DUNN,

358. AND THIS IS THE SLINGSHOT

359. REDEMPTION.

360. OH!

361. THAT REALLY HURT THOUGH.

362. HA HA HA.

363. GO AHEAD.

364. WHOA!

365. DOUBLE UP, DOUBLE UP.

366. OOH!

367. HA HA HA HA!

368. I GOTTA BE HORRIBLE AT

369. EVERYTHING.

370. OR ELSE IT JUST WOULDN'T BE ME.

371. YEAH.|||||||||||||||||||||||||||

372. RYAN DUNN IS GETTING

373. TAR AND FEATHERED RIGHT NOW.

374. YO, RYAN.

375. YEAH?

376. OH!

377. HO HO!

378. OH, HE GOT FEATHERED!

379. HE GOT TARRED AND FEATHERED.

380. RYAN, LOOK AT ME.

381. RYAN?

382. I GOT TARRED AND FEATHERED.

383. I THOUGHT THIS ONLY WENT ON IN

384. BUGS BUNNY CARTOONS.

385. WE GOT A BUNCH OF RUBBER

386. BANDS AROUND A HOBBY-HORSE,

387. AND PONTIUS IS GONNA GET ON IT.

388. IT'S LIKE TENSION

389. AND TENT-STYLE STRENGTH.

390. HE'S GONNA GET SO

391. ANNIHILATED ON THIS HORSE.

392. I THINK IT'S GOOD.

393. I THINK HE'S GONNA—

394. I THINK—MY OPTIMISM IS

395. REALLY, REALLY HIGH.

396. OPTIMISM IS HIGH!

397. ALL RIGHT, READY?

398. YEAH, YEAH,

399. I'M READY!

400. TWO, 3!

401. WE GOTTA WEIGHT IT DOWN.

402. IT'S TOO...

403. IT'S TOO MUCH FAT.

404. GOTTA WEIGHT DOWN THE FRONT

405. THOUGH 'CAUSE, I SWEAR,

406. IT LIKE...

407. I WAS LEANING FORWARD,

408. AND IT WENT LIKE THAT.

409. I WANT TO SEE THIS SO BAD.

410. IF YOUR WEIGHT'S NOT ON,

411. IT WOBBLES.

412. YEAH, THAT'S WHY YOU GOTTA LEAN

413. FORWARD LIKE A MOTHER-.

414. YEAH, YEAH.

415. ALL RIGHT, DON'T GO.

416. HOLD ON, LET ME ADJUST THE

417. WEINER.

418. WHOO-WHO!

419. LEAN FORWARD, DUDE.

420. ONE!

421. WAIT, WAIT!

422. ONE, TWO, 3!

423. WE GOTTA TRY IT AGAIN.

424. NOW YOU SLIDE THIS THING

425. THROUGH HERE?

426. OH, MAN, THIS IS—THIS IS...

427. THIS IS AMAZING.

428. OH, YEAH, DUDE.

429. I MIGHT BE FLYING OFF THE END OF

430. THAT PART OF THE THING.

431. THIS ONE'S FOR LITTLE BIG

432. HORN.

433. IT, GO.

434. ONE, TWO, 3!

435. OH!

436. THAT WAS THE WORST EVER.

437. IT'S ALL RIGHT, MAN.

438. BUT WE'RE JUST LETTING GO.

439. WHAT WE GOTTA DO IS INSTEAD OF

440. LETTING GO, WE GOTTA RUN INTO IT

441. AND LET HIM GO.

442. YOU KNOW, SO HE EASES IN.

443. I'M RYAN DUNN,

444. AND I'M SURROUNDED BY MORONS.

445. SO, WAIT, WAIT.

446. LEAN FORWARD OR LEAN BACK?

447. LEAN FORWARD!

448. BACK!

449. I SAY BACK!

450. FORWARD!

451. THIS THING'S.

452. HE'S GONNA DO IT IN THERE SO

453. EASY.

454. FORWARD, 'CAUSE WHEN

455. HE LETS GO—

456. NO, HERE'S WHAT'S GONNA

457. WHEN YOU—

458. IT'S GONNA BE LIKE THIS,

459. AND I'M GONNA BE LEANING BACK.

460. AND RIGHT WHEN YOU LET GO,

461. IT'S GONNA—IT'S GONNA FALL

462. RIGHT BACK.

463. YEAH, YEAH, LEAN FORWARD.

464. NO, NO, NO!

465. IF I LEAN FORWARD, IT'S NOT

466. GONNA WORK.

467. YOU'VE GOT TO LEAN BACK A

468. LITTLE BIT.

469. HANG THE ON.

470. YEAH, THERE YOU GO.

471. WRAP YOUR ARMS AROUND ITS

472. NECK.

473. HOLD ON.

474. THERE YOU GO.

475. THERE YOU GO, PONTIUS,

476. THIS IS IT!

477. TWO, ONE, 3!

478. YEAH!

479. DID THAT WORK, CHRIS?

480. YEAH, YEAH!

481. IT WAS GREAT!

482. SCRAPED MY NUB.

483. YOU GUYS PLAYING TENNIS?

484. I HAVEN'T PLAYED FOR A WHILE.

485. HURT MY LEG.

486. HURT MY LEG.

487. OH!

488. OH!

489. DAMN!

490. OH.

491. YOU KNOW, I JUST NEED THE ONE.

492. YOU KNOW, I DON'T NEED

493. TWO OF THEM.

494. SO, MAYBE YOU'D JUST CHARGE ME

495. HALF PRICE.

496. YOU OUGHT TO DO—

497. COME ON, COME ON!

498. YOU'VE GOT TO GO!

499. RIGHT NOW, MY FRIEND IS GONNA

500. GET RID OF A BLACKHEAD THAT'S

501. BEEN PESTERING HIM.

502. OH!

503. OH, MY GOD!

504. OH, MY GOD IN HEAVEN.

505. GOOD GOD!

506. WHAT KIND OF PASTA IS THAT?

507. OH, MY GOD!

508. IT'S GOT A TAIL!

509. OH!

510. I THINK WE GOT IT!

511. OH!

512. UGH!

513. OH, NO, NO, NO, NO, NO, NO!

514. RIGHT HERE IS THE BEGINNING

515. OF THE BLACKHEAD.

516. YOU CAN SEE.

517. SEE HOW THE BLACK DOT STARTS

518. YELLOW.

519. AND AS IT GETS DEEPER

520. OUT FROM WHERE—

521. IT TAKES ON A CREAMY

522. WHITENESS.

523. HOW MUCH DOES BAM-BAM WEIGH?

524. HE'S...

525. HE'S CLOSE TO 500 RIGHT NOW.

526. MY NAME IS JOHNNY KNOXVILLE,

527. AND THIS IS BEAR WRESTLING.

528. IS THAT TIGHT?

529. OH, YEAH!

530. ARE YOU KIDDING?

531. IS THAT GOOD!

532. I'M SORRY, I'M SORRY!

533. LET ME LOOSEN IT.

534. YEAH, MY NUTS!

535. SORRY.

536. I GOT A LITTLE EXCITED.

537. DO YOU KNOW WHERE

538. ROUTE ONE IS?

539. YEAH.

540. I'M TRYING TO GET TO THE

541. TERRANCE BALL CENTER IT'S

542. CALLED.

543. WHOA, WHOA, WHOA, WHOA!

544. MAN, HE'S—

545. HEY!

546. WHOA, WHOA!

547. GET HIM, GET HIM!

548. WHAT'S THE MATTER WITH YOU?

549. YOU READY?

550. YEAH!

551. ON 3.

552. ONE...

553. TWO, 3.

554. OH!

555. HA HA!

556. IS IT COMING OUT?

557. THEY GOT IT.

558. STEVE-O JUST POOPED ON

559. STILTS.