1. Frank, would you like
another buttered nipple?Copy !req
2. No. The cream
is making me gassy.Copy !req
3. - Yeah, well, you have had
four of them.
- Yeah.Copy !req
4. - You know, we could order youCopy !req
5. something that's a little bit
easier on the pipes.Copy !req
6. Yeah.
- You know,
I know what you're doing.Copy !req
7. This is your annualCopy !req
8. "take me out and see
if you can talk me intoCopy !req
9. giving you more of my money."Copy !req
10. - Oh, stop.
- Uh— Is he talking to us?Copy !req
11. - Give me money.
- We would never.Copy !req
12. And we just want you
to have a fun night.Copy !req
13. Yeah.Copy !req
14. Oh.Copy !req
15. - Yeah, get that.
- What you working on there, bud?Copy !req
16. I brought my own can
of anchoviesCopy !req
17. because the fish in this place
is not salty enough.Copy !req
18. - Mm, that's...
- I agree.Copy !req
19. - Got no taste.
Yeah.Copy !req
20. Yeah, no, I-I hear you.Copy !req
21. It's, uh, it's not salty enough.Copy !req
22. I want to point something out
here to you, Frank.Copy !req
23. I think we do a pretty good jobCopy !req
24. of pretending like
you're not an animal.Copy !req
25. Is that thing loaded,
by the way?Copy !req
26. Nah, it's not loaded.Copy !req
27. - And get off my back,Copy !req
28. huh?Copy !req
29. - Hey. Absolutely.
- Yup.Copy !req
30. You got it.Copy !req
31. Got no intention to beCopy !req
32. - riding on your back, pal.
- No.Copy !req
33. We like you
just the way you are.Copy !req
34. - Mm. Mm-hmm.
- And I think that, you know,Copy !req
35. maybe, just possibly, that
entitles us to a little tasteCopy !req
36. - of your fortune after you die?
- Oh.Copy !req
37. - You know what I mean? I-I...
- Oh.Copy !req
38. I want to tell you something,Copy !req
39. I am not intending on dying
anytime soon,Copy !req
40. so don't waste your breath.Copy !req
41. - You know what? Screw this.Copy !req
42. - Okay.
- I... Dee, I told you
this was a mistake.Copy !req
43. - No, I know, I know.
- I— You know what? I'm outCopy !req
44. - of here.
- Couple of vulturesCopy !req
45. picking at my carcass.Copy !req
46. - Uh-huh.
- You know, I am in the primeCopy !req
47. - of my life.
- Yeah.Copy !req
48. I mean, if you think
that you can...Copy !req
49. You shot us!Copy !req
50. You shot us!
I got shot in the face!Copy !req
51. You said there were no bullets!Copy !req
52. Okay, so it was loaded.
My mistake.Copy !req
53. Oh, don't be so dramatic.Copy !req
54. I just nicked you.Copy !req
55. It's not like anybody's
in any real danger.Copy !req
56. I'm saying, don't shoot
the whole balloon down, right?Copy !req
57. - Like, you-you pull it down...
- Frank shot us.Copy !req
58. He shot us in the face.
We barely survived.Copy !req
59. Awesome.Copy !req
60. - Wha...
- Uh, no, not awesome.Copy !req
61. Oh, sorry.
You came in all excited.Copy !req
62. I thought you were bragging.Copy !req
63. I was picking up
on an excited energy, for sure.Copy !req
64. Getting shot in the face
and surviving is pretty cool.Copy !req
65. Yeah.Copy !req
66. This is insane.Copy !req
67. Listen, we got to get his gun
away from him, okay?Copy !req
68. I-I don't even care
about the money anymore.Copy !req
69. Oh, yeah, no, no, neither do I.Copy !req
70. I don't give a shit
about the money.Copy !req
71. I mean, the man is a maniac,Copy !req
72. and he's gonna wind up shooting
everyone in this bar.Copy !req
73. Oh, yeah. I do care
about the money, though.Copy !req
74. - Yeah, no, so do I. Absolutely.
- Yeah.Copy !req
75. - It's the only thing I care
about. Are you kidding me?
- Yeah. Yeah.Copy !req
76. Come on. You know
what I'm worried about?Copy !req
77. I'm worried he's gonna
kill himself with that gunCopy !req
78. before he gets
old and senile enoughCopy !req
79. to rewrite us into the will.Copy !req
80. That's it. That's it.
We need him to liveCopy !req
81. long enough
so he can become fully demented.Copy !req
82. - Mm-hmm.
I know, but, guys,Copy !req
83. I'm picking up, like,Copy !req
84. a super stressed-out vibe
from you,Copy !req
85. and it's really important
to remember, like,Copy !req
86. you know,
money isn't everything.Copy !req
87. Yeah, of course
you don't care, Charlie,Copy !req
88. because your dad didn't have
anything to pass down to you.Copy !req
89. No, that's true,
but my mom does. Yeah.Copy !req
90. On my mom's family side, I got a
huge inheritance coming my way.Copy !req
91. Wait, what?Copy !req
92. H-How did I not know this?
You're gonna be rich?Copy !req
93. Yeah. Totally. Yeah.Copy !req
94. Well, uh,
rich in history and legacyCopy !req
95. and, uh...
teeth, of course.Copy !req
96. Teeth?Copy !req
97. Yeah. It's a pretty sweet deal,
actually, you know.Copy !req
98. Everyone on my mom's side
of the family,Copy !req
99. going back to the Niña
and the-the PintaCopy !req
100. and the, uh, Santa Margherita,Copy !req
101. um, they've all been putting
their teeth into a jarCopy !req
102. - when they die.
- Mm-hmm.Copy !req
103. And, uh, when I turn 40,Copy !req
104. that sweet little pieceCopy !req
105. of history's coming my way.Copy !req
106. Just stop. Okay, Dee,Copy !req
107. we need to get that gun
away from Frank.Copy !req
108. Whoa-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh.Copy !req
109. You don't do something
like that.Copy !req
110. You know, because, like,
Frank's gun is a big pieceCopy !req
111. of who he is, right?Copy !req
112. That's his legacy.
That's his history.Copy !req
113. That's like, that's like
my jar of teeth, right?Copy !req
114. I don't want that taken away
from me when I get old.Copy !req
115. What are you talking about?Copy !req
116. Charlie, I got some
bad news for you, bud.Copy !req
117. What?Copy !req
118. You turned 40 a long time ago.Copy !req
119. Yo. Hey, Ma, how you doing?Copy !req
120. - Hi, Mom.
- Oh, hi, boys.Copy !req
121. - What brings you by?
- Yeah, uh,Copy !req
122. hey, I want to show Mac
that jar of family teeth we got.Copy !req
123. Oh.Copy !req
124. - Y-You-you do?
Yeah.Copy !req
125. Hey, Ma, did you realize
I was over 40?Copy !req
126. You are?Copy !req
127. Yeah, turns out. Yeah, I figured
you probably forgot, too,Copy !req
128. or something, but, um, yeah,Copy !req
129. can I get that jar of teeth
now, please?Copy !req
130. Oh, okay, I-I'll go
look for them.Copy !req
131. Okay, yeah, good.
Go-go get my teeth, please.Copy !req
132. Cool. Hey, Mom,Copy !req
133. since we're here, um,Copy !req
134. do we have any kind of, like,Copy !req
135. family heirlooms or anything?Copy !req
136. No.Copy !req
137. Like, anything of valueCopy !req
138. that our family owned
at some point?Copy !req
139. No.Copy !req
140. Hm. Okay, what if it's just,
like, sentimental?Copy !req
141. Just, like,
proof that we existed?Copy !req
142. Nope.Copy !req
143. Wait, what about those letters?Copy !req
144. Weren't there
some kind of lettersCopy !req
145. that my grandfather
wrote to my dadCopy !req
146. during World War II?Copy !req
147. Yeah.Copy !req
148. Those letters exist?
Well, well, who's got them?Copy !req
149. Donald.Copy !req
150. - Donald? Donald who?
- Oh...Copy !req
151. Duck.Copy !req
152. Yeah.Copy !req
153. Donald... Donald Duck?
What's she talking about?Copy !req
154. Yeah, my mom's making a joke.
She's-she's really funny.Copy !req
155. She's got a great sense
of humor. Right, Mom?Copy !req
156. Yeah.Copy !req
157. Yeah. She's talking
about my Uncle Donald.Copy !req
158. Huh. I didn't even know
you had an uncle Donald.Copy !req
159. Yeah, yeah,
that's my dad's brother.Copy !req
160. Donald McDonald?Copy !req
161. Yeah.Copy !req
162. Ronald McDonald.Copy !req
163. Donald McDonald. Wow.Copy !req
164. Your dad really scored with
the name Luther, I guess, huh?Copy !req
165. Mom? What happened?Copy !req
166. Oh, shit.Copy !req
167. Did she try to pull out
her own teeth?Copy !req
168. Did you just try to pull out
your own teeth?Copy !req
169. - Mm-mm.
- She clearly did.Copy !req
170. - I can see the pliers.
- We can see the pliers, Mom.Copy !req
171. - Ah! Ugh!
- Oh!Copy !req
172. - I'm so sorry.
Mom.Copy !req
173. Oh, my God. Why did you do that?Copy !req
174. I didn't have the heart
to-to tell you,Copy !req
175. I gave away the jar.Copy !req
176. You gave away the jar of teeth?
To who?Copy !req
177. Your sisters.Copy !req
178. To my sisters?Copy !req
179. Those ungrateful bitches.
What the hell, Mom?Copy !req
180. They don't even live
in Philly anymore.Copy !req
181. They moved all the way
up to northern New Jersey.Copy !req
182. They're terrible to you.Copy !req
183. I'm the one who stayed. I'm
the one who takes care of you.Copy !req
184. How could you do that?Copy !req
185. - Now she's screaming.
- This is crazy.Copy !req
186. Now she's screaming.
Now she's screaming.Copy !req
187. - Well, you yelled at her.
- Now Mom's screaming.Copy !req
188. Now Mom's screaming.Copy !req
189. Ah, I can't believe
you did this.Copy !req
190. - Why are you yelling at her?
I don't know...
- She gave it away to my sisters.Copy !req
191. They're the worst people
on the planet.Copy !req
192. I didn't even remember
that you had sisters.Copy !req
193. All right. Okay, okay.Copy !req
194. Look, we're just gonna have
to go and get them.Copy !req
195. I think she's having
a stroke, dude.Copy !req
196. We're just gonna have
to get in the car right nowCopy !req
197. - and go get them. Come on, man.
- We should go to the hospital.Copy !req
198. Let's get in the car. Let's go.Copy !req
199. Mrs. Mac, we're taking your car.
Mom, just calm down.Copy !req
200. It's okay, okay? I'm not mad
at you. It's fine, okay?Copy !req
201. - I love you.
- Breathe through your,
breathe through your nose.Copy !req
202. - I love you, too.
I love you, too.
- This is fucking insane.Copy !req
203. I made a mistake.Copy !req
204. You did make a mistake.
You did make this... All right.Copy !req
205. Christ, let's get her
cleaned up. All right.Copy !req
206. I didn't mean to upset you.Copy !req
207. Frank, um,Copy !req
208. could you stop scratching
yourself with the gun, please?Copy !req
209. - I'm itchy, I'm itchy.
- I-I bet.Copy !req
210. Probably from rolling around
in the grassCopy !req
211. outside of your apartment.Copy !req
212. No, I was rolling around
in the grassCopy !req
213. because I was itchy.Copy !req
214. The itch came first.Copy !req
215. Okay, well, why don't you
hand me the gun,Copy !req
216. - and I'll scratch you
with my fingers.
- Yeah.Copy !req
217. I'm not gonna hand you my gun,Copy !req
218. but I'll let you scratch.
You want to scratch me?Copy !req
219. - Go on. Yeah.
- Okay.Copy !req
220. - All right.
- Scratch me. See.Copy !req
221. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Do it down by the neck.Copy !req
222. - Frank, I...
The back of the neck.
The back of the neck.Copy !req
223. - Okay, but I just don't want
to get shot again, is all.Copy !req
224. The gun's not loaded.Copy !req
225. Yeah, that's what you said
last time, Frank.Copy !req
226. I got to take a piss.Copy !req
227. - Pull over.
All right.Copy !req
228. Okay.Copy !req
229. - Goddamn it.Copy !req
230. This is not working.Copy !req
231. Should we just attack him
and take it?Copy !req
232. What? No.Copy !req
233. He'd mow us down like Scarface.
We can't come at him like that.Copy !req
234. - We'll spook him.
- Yeah.Copy !req
235. You know what?
He needs to be lulledCopy !req
236. into a false sense of security.Copy !req
237. You don't tell a dog
you're taking him to a vetCopy !req
238. to put him down.Copy !req
239. Right.Copy !req
240. You give
that dog
the best day of his life,Copy !req
241. and then you turn out the lights
when he least suspects it.Copy !req
242. - Okay.Copy !req
243. Okay. Oh...Copy !req
244. Ooh.Copy !req
245. Ooh, that was a long wait.Copy !req
246. - Woo.
- Wow.Copy !req
247. Why is your mom driving
my mom's car?Copy !req
248. I don't know. Dude, they got
some weird arrangementCopy !req
249. worked out so your mom
can focus on smoking.Copy !req
250. Speaking of, I'm getting
choked to death back here.Copy !req
251. Mrs. Mac, do you mind, like,
cracking a window or something?Copy !req
252. No.Copy !req
253. Why not? I mean, it's ridiculous
to just sit in the smoke.Copy !req
254. 'Cause it's too drafty.
It's unhealthy.Copy !req
255. - Right.
- Unheal— What?Copy !req
256. Sorry, my mom's on
a new health kick.Copy !req
257. Hey, Mom, it's working.
You look great.Copy !req
258. Shut up.Copy !req
259. Can we, like speed up
or something?Copy !req
260. Another car just passed us.
Mom, that's, like, the 50th car.Copy !req
261. Why are you going so slow?Copy !req
262. Well, highways are scary.Copy !req
263. You're going 35.Copy !req
264. - I can see you're going 35.
- But— And everybody'sCopy !req
265. just in such a hurry.Copy !req
266. No, it's just the normal—Copy !req
267. It's the speed that people go
on the highway.Copy !req
268. Okay, maybe I should drive.
Mom, can I drive your car?Copy !req
269. - Can Mac drive?
- No.Copy !req
270. Ugh, this is my worst
nightmare, man.Copy !req
271. This is absolutely terrible.
How much further?Copy !req
272. Anyone know? Mac?Copy !req
273. How much further? Mac?Copy !req
274. Mac? Hello?Copy !req
275. My mom's finger
is up, which means "no talking".Copy !req
276. She's annoyed. It's best if weCopy !req
277. just keep it down
until the finger goes down,Copy !req
278. otherwise, she might burn us
with the cigarette lighter.Copy !req
279. This is my worst nightmareCopy !req
280. in my entire life.Copy !req
281. Okay, finger's down. Um, great.Copy !req
282. Uh, okay, Mrs. Kelly,
you're gonna want to stayCopy !req
283. on the Jersey Turnpike
until you hit 287.Copy !req
284. You want to take 287
towards Hamburg.Copy !req
285. Mm, no. That—
No, you just stay on the 206Copy !req
286. the whole way up.Copy !req
287. No, no, we're gonna,Copy !req
288. we're gonna hit Hamburg
on the way.Copy !req
289. Why are we going to Hamburg?Copy !req
290. We're gonna visit
my Uncle Donald.Copy !req
291. - Donald McDonald
of Hamburger, New Jersey?
- Hamburg.Copy !req
292. A bunch of old letters that
weren't even written to you?Copy !req
293. That's not a legacy, it's
a bunch of meaningless shit.Copy !req
294. Not as meaningless as a jar
full of teeth.Copy !req
295. Ah! She got you.
She got you.
- Sorry, Mom, sorry, Mom.Copy !req
296. Sorry, Mom.
I didn't see the finger.Copy !req
297. No, her hand was not
in the air that time.Copy !req
298. - She burnt the shit out of me.
- You didn't even put your hand—Copy !req
299. - Oh, it's up now, it's up now.
- Yeah.Copy !req
300. Frank, we got a little
surprise for you, bud.Copy !req
301. What's that?Copy !req
302. Hamburgers.Copy !req
303. - Oh, hamburgers?Copy !req
304. Oh, that's one
of the best food there is.Copy !req
305. Yeah, yes, they really are.Copy !req
306. And, you know what, you can eat
them right here in the car.Copy !req
307. You know, once in a while,
they give me the runs.Copy !req
308. Yeah, that's why we put
that towel down for you, buddy.Copy !req
309. Mmm. Mmm!Copy !req
310. - Okay. All right.Copy !req
311. - Mmm.
- You want to take it easy?Copy !req
312. Goddamn. Just one bite
at a time,Copy !req
313. or you're gonna barf everywhere.Copy !req
314. - Mmm.
- Yeah, it's good, huh?Copy !req
315. Yeah, really hammering them
down there, huh, bud?Copy !req
316. Very good. Mmm.Copy !req
317. Oh!Copy !req
318. I almost ate my gun.Copy !req
319. I dipped it in the ketchup.Copy !req
320. Thought it was a french fry.Copy !req
321. Yeah, that is funny.Copy !req
322. Wow.Copy !req
323. Hey, you know what?Copy !req
324. I'm-I'm gonna pull over, Frank.Copy !req
325. I got to take a piss anyway.Copy !req
326. Again. Okay.Copy !req
327. Well, Frank...
What?Copy !req
328. Look where we are.Copy !req
329. We're at the bridge.Copy !req
330. Oh, I haven't been here
in forever.Copy !req
331. - Go check it out— Oh!
- Oh!
- Oh.Copy !req
332. - Ooh.
- Did-did you just slam your head
into the window?Copy !req
333. Yeah, I didn't realize
it was up.Copy !req
334. Well, were you gonna
dive out of it?Copy !req
335. Yeah, I was very excited.
I want to go.Copy !req
336. - All right.
- Go see the boys.Copy !req
337. - Have fun, buddy.
- Go see the boys.Copy !req
338. - Get after it.
Okay.Copy !req
339. Okay.
- I don't know how much
more of this I can take.Copy !req
340. Hey, we're almost there, Dee,
okay? He's getting tired.Copy !req
341. Let's let run him around
the bridge for a little while,Copy !req
342. - and then we have
one more stop, okay?
- Uh...Copy !req
343. Oh, he's pissing
on another hydrant.Copy !req
344. Okay. He's...Copy !req
345. literally turning into a dog.Copy !req
346. Yeah.Copy !req
347. I got to smash.Copy !req
348. You just smashed. You smashed,
like, three timesCopy !req
349. on the way up here.
We keep having to pull overCopy !req
350. - so you can smash. What...
- There is a lot of smashing.Copy !req
351. She's very regular.Copy !req
352. Oh, no, I'm out of paper towels.Copy !req
353. Oh, I wouldn't worry
about that, Mrs. Kelly.Copy !req
354. I'm sure my Uncle Donald
has toilet paper.Copy !req
355. You've been wiping
with paper towels?Copy !req
356. I hope everyoneCopy !req
357. brought their appetiteCopy !req
358. because I made quiche.Copy !req
359. Aw, that's really nice,
Uncle Donald,Copy !req
360. but we're kind of in a hurry.Copy !req
361. W-Well, that's a shame.Copy !req
362. We never get to see each other.Copy !req
363. Yeah, that is a shame,Copy !req
364. but I'm really here
about the letters.Copy !req
365. You know, the letters thatCopy !req
366. Grandpop wrote to you and Dad
during the war.Copy !req
367. Oh. Oh, yes, yes,
I-I-I have those letters.Copy !req
368. Oh, that's great.Copy !req
369. I was kind of hoping
they would pass down to me.Copy !req
370. You know, sort of like
a family heirloom.Copy !req
371. Well, that would make sense
because, well,Copy !req
372. they weren't actually
written to me.Copy !req
373. They were addressed
only, uh, to your dad.Copy !req
374. Grandpop didn't write to you?Copy !req
375. He-he liked your dad,
uh... more.Copy !req
376. Uh, you know, I was the, um,Copy !req
377. you know, "funny" one, you know.Copy !req
378. It's the reason
I never got married.Copy !req
379. Not something we talked about
back then, but...Copy !req
380. but i-it always made me feel,Copy !req
381. uh, a little, uh...Copy !req
382. different.Copy !req
383. Well, I-I'm sure
you can understandCopy !req
384. what that feels like, Ronald.Copy !req
385. No.Copy !req
386. So, the letters?Copy !req
387. - Oh, yes.
- Yeah?Copy !req
388. Oh!
- Sure.Copy !req
389. Okay.Copy !req
390. Yeah, this is, uh,
this is great, Uncle Donald,Copy !req
391. 'cause it's really gonna tieCopy !req
392. a lot of things together
for me, you know?Copy !req
393. It's, uh— I have something
to pass down to my kids.Copy !req
394. It's-it's important
to have a legacy.Copy !req
395. Oh, yes. You know, I...Copy !req
396. I wouldn't know, though.
I, you know, I...Copy !req
397. I don't have
any children of my own.Copy !req
398. Oh, yeah.Copy !req
399. What is
this guy's deal?
Oh, here they are.Copy !req
400. It's, like,
everything you've ever wanted.Copy !req
401. Kind of sad, really, uh,
me keeping lettersCopy !req
402. that, uh, weren't even for me.Copy !req
403. You know. But, uh...Copy !req
404. I guess I just, uh,
wanted a connection, uh...Copy !req
405. with my dad.Copy !req
406. Yeah.Copy !req
407. That is sad.Copy !req
408. If I could just— Yeah.
Thank you.Copy !req
409. I mean, you know,
there's nothing more...Copy !req
410. more important in this world
than the connectionCopy !req
411. between a father and a son.Copy !req
412. Well, besides the connection
between a son and a mother.Copy !req
413. Right, Mom?Copy !req
414. She's smashing.Copy !req
415. - Yeah, she took off, man.
- Yeah, she had to smash.Copy !req
416. Well, I guess we could wait
for her in the car.Copy !req
417. This is so annoying.Copy !req
418. I mean, you're gonna
take time out of my day,Copy !req
419. and you have everything you've
ever dreamed of right here,Copy !req
420. but we're gonna just blow
right past it, aren't we?Copy !req
421. It's probably time to go, huh?Copy !req
422. - Well, uh, o-okay.
- Yeah.Copy !req
423. Okay, well-well, uh,
you know, hey,Copy !req
424. if you ever want to, uh,
you know, hang out,Copy !req
425. you know, we could throw
the old football around.Copy !req
426. Ah, I don't really like
playing football.Copy !req
427. It's kind of for jocks.Copy !req
428. - It's all he ever talks about...
- No, it's like...Copy !req
429. is wanting to have
a catch with his dad, so...Copy !req
430. Nah, 'cause remember
we were talking about howCopy !req
431. it was like a... for jocks?Copy !req
432. - Uh, no. That never happened.
- Oh.Copy !req
433. Uh, yeah, well, uh,
we could read.Copy !req
434. - We could read.
- Oh, but, like, he can't read.Copy !req
435. - Imagine that. Imagine that.
- He can't read, so...Copy !req
436. Yeah, but he's not talking
about me, he's talking aboutCopy !req
437. - bonding with you.
- Yeah, like...Copy !req
438. But we're gonna
blow right past this, huh?Copy !req
439. Reading is for nerds, so...Copy !req
440. - Yeah, is that what it is?
- Yeah.Copy !req
441. - Uh, cards?
- Uh, well,Copy !req
442. the thing about cards
is, like, with the...Copy !req
443. the jacks and the queens
and the kings and, like,Copy !req
444. I don't like
celebrating royalty.Copy !req
445. - You know, he-he knows that.
- Oh, my God, dude.Copy !req
446. - Oh, my God, man.
- You know that.
We've talked about that.Copy !req
447. You're driving me crazy, dude.
All right, fine, let's go.Copy !req
448. - Bye-bye.
- Okay, maybe you guys
can swap phone numbers or...Copy !req
449. - I think that would be weird.
- No? No, not gonna do it?Copy !req
450. - That would be weird. Okay.
- Fine, then this was a good
waste of our time, wasn't it?Copy !req
451. - Well, tCopy !req
452. - Yep.
- Mm.Copy !req
453. Beautiful.
Probably brings backCopy !req
454. a lot of good memories.Copy !req
455. - Right, Frank?
- Absolutely.Copy !req
456. - Yeah.
- You guys, uh, mind if I...Copy !req
457. - Oh, no. Of course. No, please.
Please. Yeah.
- Please. Yeah.Copy !req
458. Take that you, cesspool.Copy !req
459. Polluted sack of shit.Copy !req
460. You know, Dee, I kind of feel
like we did a good thing here.Copy !req
461. I do, too.
We gave him a good day.Copy !req
462. - Mm-hmm.
- For him.Copy !req
463. Not for a normal person.Copy !req
464. - Yeah. Jesus.Copy !req
465. Right.Copy !req
466. You all done, bud?Copy !req
467. - Yeah. Thanks, guys.
- Yeah.Copy !req
468. - Good. Hey, oh, absolutely.
- Yeah.Copy !req
469. - You got it.
- Hey, listen,
where to now, Frank?Copy !req
470. - We want to take you somewhere.
- Uh, no, it's okay. I get it.Copy !req
471. I-I thought it was
a cash grab at first,Copy !req
472. but I see where you're going.Copy !req
473. The hamburger, playing
with Duncan under the bridge,Copy !req
474. and now the beach.Copy !req
475. A perfect day
can't last forever.Copy !req
476. I know why we're here.Copy !req
477. Oh. You do?Copy !req
478. Gosh.Copy !req
479. Thanks for making it
so easy on us.Copy !req
480. - We expected more resistance.
- Yeah.Copy !req
481. Well, I guess hung on
a little bit too long.Copy !req
482. - A little bit.
- And afterwards,
you guys can have the money.Copy !req
483. You mean it?
- Really?Copy !req
484. Yeah. Here.Copy !req
485. Oh. Gosh.Copy !req
486. I-I got to say, this-this wentCopy !req
487. - so much more smoothly than I...
- Yeah, it really did.Copy !req
488. Uh, just do it when I'm looking
out at the ocean.Copy !req
489. Huh?Copy !req
490. Ah, don't be coy.
I had a good run.Copy !req
491. - What are you...
- And it's really goodCopy !req
492. you didn't do it
in front of Charlie.Copy !req
493. That was a class move.Copy !req
494. Just put me down quick.Copy !req
495. Put you down? Wha...Copy !req
496. Oh, you know what?
I think I'm gonna run,Copy !req
497. and then you do
what you have to do.Copy !req
498. But if you shoot me in the leg,
come over and finish me off,Copy !req
499. because I don't want
to lay there and suffer.Copy !req
500. - Actually, here,
I'm gonna take...
- What?Copy !req
501. What the hell are you doing?Copy !req
502. I'm gonna go natural,
because I've seenCopy !req
503. too many guys die
and take a shit in their pants.Copy !req
504. I don't want that.
And bury my poop.Copy !req
505. Or just kick some sand over it.Copy !req
506. 'Cause— And then you can do
what you want to do.Copy !req
507. You can float me out into
the ocean and let sharks eat me.Copy !req
508. Or you can leave me
on the ground,Copy !req
509. gruesome for the kids to see.Copy !req
510. Oh, ugh. Oh, my God.Copy !req
511. We are not gonna
kill you, Frank.Copy !req
512. - Huh?
- What, did you thinkCopy !req
513. we were just gonna shoot you
right here on the beach?Copy !req
514. I mean,
there-there's people around.Copy !req
515. I'm actually surprised
they didn't runCopy !req
516. - when you started
shooting the ocean.
- I-I'm not.Copy !req
517. It's the Jersey Shore.
But good God, man.Copy !req
518. Well, if you're not gonna
snuff me out,Copy !req
519. what the hell are you doing?Copy !req
520. We were giving you
one last day with your gun.Copy !req
521. Yeah, it's time
to let it go, Frank.Copy !req
522. You were stealing my gun?Copy !req
523. Well...
- Screw that.Copy !req
524. No, it's too dangerous, Frank.Copy !req
525. You're out of control
with that thing.Copy !req
526. By the way,
you're out of the will again.Copy !req
527. - What?
- Why? Just because of the gun?
- Yeah.Copy !req
528. Exactly. Because I don't
trust you two guys.Copy !req
529. I mean, if you're in the will,
who knows?Copy !req
530. You may wind up
shooting me in the back.Copy !req
531. - Ah!
- You just told us
to shoot you in the back!Copy !req
532. That's different.
It's not the same thing.Copy !req
533. Take me back to Philly.Copy !req
534. You get an Uber.Copy !req
535. Yeah.
- Get in the car.Copy !req
536. - Goddamn it.
- Go on. Let's go.
- Dee,Copy !req
537. - why'd you let him snatch
that thing back?
- I-I...Copy !req
538. All right, let's go.Copy !req
539. - Just barge right in, Mom.
- O-Okay.Copy !req
540. Don't-don't be shy, okay?Copy !req
541. Bunny?Copy !req
542. Candy?Copy !req
543. - Are you home?
- Which one is the can?Copy !req
544. There's probably, like,
a million bathrooms.Copy !req
545. Just go find a bathroom,
Mrs. Mac.Copy !req
546. - I don't remember those
being your sisters' names.Copy !req
547. No, it's not their names.
They had their names changed.Copy !req
548. Oh. How do they afford
to live like this?Copy !req
549. T-They're doing
some, like, stupid,Copy !req
550. like, social media thing.Copy !req
551. I-I don't know, I guess
they're making a killing on it.Copy !req
552. Hey! Candy, Bunny!Copy !req
553. - Candy...
- Oh, my God.Copy !req
554. Mom, what are you doing here?Copy !req
555. Well, we just wanted
to drive up...Copy !req
556. Why'd you bring Dirt Grub?Copy !req
557. Oh, yeah, hi.
Nice to see you, too.Copy !req
558. Shut up, fag!Copy !req
559. Why'd you bring your fag friend?Copy !req
560. Yeah, why is Mac here?Copy !req
561. - This is so distasteful.Copy !req
562. Uh, dude, uh...Copy !req
563. You know what? I'm not
gonna argue with you guys.Copy !req
564. - Oh, you're not?
- Okay? No, I'm just hereCopy !req
565. - for the teeth.
- No, you can't have them.Copy !req
566. Yeah, you can't
have them, Charlie.Copy !req
567. - You can't have them.
- Mom gave them to us.Copy !req
568. Well, what do you even care
about the teeth?Copy !req
569. I-I thought you always said
they were weird and gross.Copy !req
570. - They are weird and gross.
- Yeah, super gross,Copy !req
571. but people like that stuff,
so we need them.Copy !req
572. - We need them.
- Need them for what?Copy !req
573. ASMR, dickweed.Copy !req
574. Yeah. ASMR.Copy !req
575. What is that? What even is that?Copy !req
576. We stick our hands in the jar.Copy !req
577. People pay to watch us
stick our hand in the jar.Copy !req
578. - They pay for that shit.
- Yeah.Copy !req
579. They like the noise
of the teeth,Copy !req
580. and they give us a lot
of money on OnlyFans.Copy !req
581. - Like, a lot of money.
- What?Copy !req
582. - More than you could
ever imagine.
- Yeah.Copy !req
583. All your doing is sticking
your hands in teethCopy !req
584. and people pay you enough
to live like this?Copy !req
585. - We obviously take
our tops off. Like...
- Obviously.Copy !req
586. - Oh, girls.
Oh, my God.Copy !req
587. - Shut up, slut.
- You're literally a slut.Copy !req
588. All right, you know what? Give
me the teeth. Give me the teeth.Copy !req
589. No. Finders keepers, bitch.Copy !req
590. - Finders keepers.
- You did not find them!Copy !req
591. - Mom gave them to you.
- Yeah, she did.Copy !req
592. - Okay, we're her favorite.
- I clogged the toilet.Copy !req
593. - What the hell? Gross.
- Who is this old lady
clogging our toilet?Copy !req
594. That's my mommy.Copy !req
595. Gross, Mac!Copy !req
596. Why did you clog our toilet?Copy !req
597. Why'd you clog our toilet,
old lady?Copy !req
598. There was no TP.Copy !req
599. If there was no TP,
what did you wipe with?Copy !req
600. The letters.Copy !req
601. You wiped your butt
with the lettersCopy !req
602. that Grandpop sent Dad and then
flushed them down the toilet?Copy !req
603. Yeah.Copy !req
604. Oh, my God.Copy !req
605. This is so weird, guys.
You got to go.Copy !req
606. - All right, you know what?
- No. No.Copy !req
607. Hey, hey. Put that down.Copy !req
608. This is gonna be
the new Kelly family heirloom,Copy !req
609. and I'm gonna put
all my teeth in itCopy !req
610. and all of Mom's teeth in it
and none of yours.Copy !req
611. Okay.Copy !req
612. Oh, uh, yep.Copy !req
613. - Yep. Yep.
- You got to stopCopy !req
614. doing that. You're not gonna
have any teeth left.Copy !req
615. You sure you don't want
to pop a couple in?Copy !req
616. You know, you can be
a part of my legacy, dude.Copy !req
617. I-I feel like you should be.Copy !req
618. - No, I-I'm good.
- Yeah?Copy !req
619. - Yeah, I'm good.
- All right, I'll tell you what.Copy !req
620. When one-one falls out,
go ahead and toss it in.Copy !req
621. - It's cool.
- It won't.Copy !req
622. Yeah. There. Take that, lock.Copy !req
623. Oh, what the hell, man?Copy !req
624. And the door wasn't even locked.Copy !req
625. You're paying
for that door, Frank.Copy !req
626. All right, all right.Copy !req
627. Well, this is great.
This is just great.Copy !req
628. You know, like, now
what are we supposed to all putCopy !req
629. - our teeth in?
- Our faces?Copy !req
630. - What are you talking about?
- I'm talking about our legacy.Copy !req
631. You know?
I can't hold onto it, man.Copy !req
632. Legacy? You want to talk legacy?
You know what our legacy is?Copy !req
633. Spending our lives
in this goddamn barCopy !req
634. with a lunatic man
who acts like a dogCopy !req
635. and handles
his gun like a maniac!Copy !req
636. Oh, fine.Copy !req
637. I see where this
pity party's headed.Copy !req
638. If you're gonna be
crybabies about it,Copy !req
639. all right, take my gun.Copy !req
640. - Ow! Ow!
- Shit!Copy !req
641. Shit.Copy !req
642. Well, there you have it, Frank.Copy !req
643. You've officially shot
everyone in the bar.Copy !req