1. Frank, would you like
another buttered nipple?Copy !req
2. No. The cream
is making me gassy.Copy !req
3. - Yeah, well, you have had
four of them.
- Yeah.Copy !req
4. - You know, we could order youCopy !req
5. something that's a little bit
easier on the pipes.Copy !req
6. - Yeah.
- You know,
I know what you're doing.Copy !req
7. This is your annualCopy !req
8. "take me out and see
if you can talk me intoCopy !req
9. giving you more of my money."Copy !req
10. - Oh, stop.
- Uh— Is he talking to us?Copy !req
11. - Give me money.
- We would never.Copy !req
12. - And we just want you
to have a fun night.Copy !req
13. Yeah.Copy !req
14. Oh.Copy !req
15. - Yeah, get that.
- What you working on there, bud?Copy !req
16. I brought my own can
of anchoviesCopy !req
17. because the fish in this place
is not salty enough.Copy !req
18. - Mm, that's...
- I agree.Copy !req
19. - Got no taste.
- Yeah.Copy !req
20. Yeah, no, I-I hear you.Copy !req
21. It's, uh, it's not salty enough.Copy !req
22. I want to point something out
here to you, Frank.Copy !req
23. I think we do a pretty good jobCopy !req
24. of pretending like
you're not an animal.Copy !req
25. Is that thing loaded,
by the way?Copy !req
26. Nah, it's not loaded.Copy !req
27. - And get off my back,Copy !req
28. huh?Copy !req
29. - Hey. Absolutely.
- Yup.Copy !req
30. You got it.Copy !req
31. Got no intention to beCopy !req
32. - riding on your back, pal.
- No.Copy !req
33. We like you
just the way you are.Copy !req
34. - Mm. Mm-hmm.
- And I think that, you know,Copy !req
35. maybe, just possibly, that
entitles us to a little tasteCopy !req
36. - of your fortune after you die?
- Oh.Copy !req
37. - You know what I mean? I-I...
- Oh.Copy !req
38. I want to tell you something,Copy !req
39. I am not intending on dying
anytime soon,Copy !req
40. so don't waste your breath.Copy !req
41. - You know what? Screw this.Copy !req
42. - Okay.
- I— Dee, I told you
this was a mistake.Copy !req
43. - No, I know, I know.
- I— You know what? I'm outCopy !req
44. - of here.
- Couple of vulturesCopy !req
45. picking at my carcass.Copy !req
46. - Uh-huh.
- You know, I am in the primeCopy !req
47. - of my life.
- Yeah.Copy !req
48. I mean, if you think
that you can—Copy !req
49. - You shot us!Copy !req
50. - You shot us!
- I'm shot in the face!Copy !req
51. You said there were no bullets!Copy !req
52. Okay, so it was loaded.
My mistake.Copy !req
53. Oh, don't be so dramatic.Copy !req
54. I just nicked you.Copy !req
55. It's not like anybody's
in any real danger.Copy !req
56. I'm saying don't shootCopy !req
57. the whole balloon down, right?
Like, you-you...Copy !req
58. - you pull it down—
- Frank shot us.Copy !req
59. He shot us in the face.
We barely survived.Copy !req
60. Awesome!Copy !req
61. - Wha...
- Uh, no, not awesome.Copy !req
62. Oh, sorry.
You came in all excited.Copy !req
63. I thought you were bragging.Copy !req
64. I was picking up
on an excited energy, for sure.Copy !req
65. Getting shot in the face
and surviving is pretty cool.Copy !req
66. Yeah.Copy !req
67. This is insane.Copy !req
68. Listen, we got to get his gun
away from him, okay?Copy !req
69. I-I don't even care
about the money anymore.Copy !req
70. Oh, yeah, no, no, neither do I.Copy !req
71. I don't give a shit
about the money.Copy !req
72. I mean, the man is a maniacCopy !req
73. and he's gonna wind up shooting
everyone in this bar.Copy !req
74. Oh, yeah. I do care
about the money, though.Copy !req
75. - Yeah, no, so do I. Absolutely.
- Yeah.Copy !req
76. - It's the only thing I care
about. Are you kidding me?
- Yeah. Yeah.Copy !req
77. Come on. You know
what I'm worried about?Copy !req
78. I'm worried he's gonna
kill himself with that gunCopy !req
79. before he gets
old and senile enoughCopy !req
80. to rewrite us into the will.Copy !req
81. That's it. That's it.
We need him to liveCopy !req
82. long enough
so he can become fully demented.Copy !req
83. - Mm-hmm.
- I know, but, guys,Copy !req
84. I'm picking up, like,Copy !req
85. a super stressed-out vibe
from you,Copy !req
86. and it's really important
to remember, like,Copy !req
87. you know,
money isn't everything.Copy !req
88. Yeah, of course
you don't care, Charlie,Copy !req
89. because your dad didn't have
anything to pass down to you.Copy !req
90. No, that's true,
but my mom does. Yeah.Copy !req
91. On my mom's family side, I got a
huge inheritance coming my way.Copy !req
92. Wait, what?Copy !req
93. H-How did I not know this?
You're gonna be rich?Copy !req
94. Yeah. Totally. Yeah.Copy !req
95. Well, uh,
rich in history and legacyCopy !req
96. and, uh...
teeth, of course.Copy !req
97. Teeth?Copy !req
98. Yeah. It's a pretty sweet deal,
actually, you know.Copy !req
99. Everyone on my mom's side
of the family,Copy !req
100. going back to the Niña
and the-the PintaCopy !req
101. and the, uh, Santa Margherita,Copy !req
102. um, they've all been putting
their teeth into a jarCopy !req
103. - when they die.
- Mm-hmm.Copy !req
104. And, uh, when I turn 40,Copy !req
105. that sweet little pieceCopy !req
106. of history's coming my way.Copy !req
107. Just stop. Okay, Dee,Copy !req
108. we need to get that gun
away from Frank.Copy !req
109. Whoa-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh.Copy !req
110. You don't do something
like that.Copy !req
111. You know, because, like,
Frank's gun is a big pieceCopy !req
112. of who he is, right?Copy !req
113. That's his legacy.
That's his history.Copy !req
114. That's like, that's like
my jar of teeth, right?Copy !req
115. I don't want that taken away
from me when I get old.Copy !req
116. What are you talking about?Copy !req
117. Charlie, I got some
bad news for you, bud.Copy !req
118. What?Copy !req
119. You turned 40 a long time ago.Copy !req
120. Yo. Hey, Ma, how you doing?Copy !req
121. - Hi, Mom.
- Oh, hi, boys.Copy !req
122. - What brings you by?
- Yeah, uh,Copy !req
123. hey, I want to show Mac
that jar of family teeth we got.Copy !req
124. Oh.Copy !req
125. - Y-You-you do?
- Yeah.Copy !req
126. Hey, Ma, did you realize
I was over 40?Copy !req
127. You are?Copy !req
128. Yeah, turns out. Yeah, I figured
you probably forgot, too,Copy !req
129. or something, but, um, yeah,Copy !req
130. can I get that jar of teeth
now, please?Copy !req
131. Oh, okay, I-I'll go
look for them.Copy !req
132. Okay, yeah, good.
Go-go get my teeth, please.Copy !req
133. Cool. Hey, Mom,Copy !req
134. since we're here, um,Copy !req
135. do we have any kind of, like,Copy !req
136. family heirlooms or anything?Copy !req
137. No.Copy !req
138. Like, anything of valueCopy !req
139. that our family owned
at some point?Copy !req
140. No.Copy !req
141. Hm. Okay, what if it's just,
like, sentimental?Copy !req
142. Just, like,
proof that we existed?Copy !req
143. Nope.Copy !req
144. Wait, what about those letters?Copy !req
145. Weren't there
some kind of lettersCopy !req
146. that my grandfather
wrote to my dadCopy !req
147. during World War II?Copy !req
148. Yeah.Copy !req
149. Those letters exist?
Well, well, who's got them?Copy !req
150. Donald.Copy !req
151. - Donald? Donald who?
- Oh...Copy !req
152. Duck.Copy !req
153. Yeah.Copy !req
154. Donald... Donald Duck?
What's she talking about?Copy !req
155. Yeah, my mom's making a joke.
She's-she's really funny.Copy !req
156. She's got a great sense
of humor. Right, Mom?Copy !req
157. Yeah.Copy !req
158. Yeah. She's talking
about my Uncle Donald.Copy !req
159. Huh. I didn't even know
you had an uncle Donald.Copy !req
160. Yeah, yeah,
that's my dad's brother.Copy !req
161. Donald McDonald?Copy !req
162. Yeah.Copy !req
163. Ronald McDonald.Copy !req
164. Donald McDonald. Wow.Copy !req
165. Your dad really scored with
the name Luther, I guess, huh?Copy !req
166. Mom? What happened?Copy !req
167. - Oh, shit.Copy !req
168. Did she try to pull out
her own teeth?Copy !req
169. Did you just try to pull out
your own teeth?Copy !req
170. - Mm-mm.
- She clearly did.Copy !req
171. - I can see the pliers.
- We can see the pliers, Mom.Copy !req
172. - Ah! Ugh!
- Oh!Copy !req
173. - I'm so sorry.
- Mom.Copy !req
174. Oh, my God. Why did you do that?Copy !req
175. I didn't have the heart
to-to tell you,Copy !req
176. I gave away the jar.Copy !req
177. You gave away the jar of teeth?
To who?Copy !req
178. Your sisters.Copy !req
179. To my sisters?Copy !req
180. Those ungrateful bitches.
What the hell, Mom?Copy !req
181. They don't even live
in Philly anymore.Copy !req
182. They moved all the way
up to northern New Jersey.Copy !req
183. They're terrible to you.Copy !req
184. I'm the one who stayed. I'm
the one who takes care of you.Copy !req
185. How could you do that?Copy !req
186. - Now she's screaming.
- This is crazy.Copy !req
187. Now she's screaming.
Now she's screaming.Copy !req
188. - Well, you yelled at her.
- Now Mom's screaming.Copy !req
189. Now Mom's screaming.Copy !req
190. Ah, I can't believe
you did this!Copy !req
191. - Why are you yelling at her?
I don't know...
- She gave it away to my sisters.Copy !req
192. They're the worst people
on the planet.Copy !req
193. I didn't even remember
that you had sisters.Copy !req
194. All right. Okay, okay.Copy !req
195. Look, we're just gonna have
to go and get them.Copy !req
196. I think she's having
a stroke, dude.Copy !req
197. We're just gonna have
to get in the car right nowCopy !req
198. - and go get them. Come on, man.
- We should go to the hospital.Copy !req
199. Let's get in the car. Let's go.Copy !req
200. Mrs. Mac, we're taking your car.
Mom, just calm down.Copy !req
201. It's okay, okay? I'm not mad
at you. It's fine, okay?Copy !req
202. - I love you.
- Breathe through your,
breathe through your nose.Copy !req
203. - I love you, too.
I love you, too.
- This is fucking insane.Copy !req
204. I made a mistake.Copy !req
205. You did make a mistake.
You did make this— All right.Copy !req
206. Christ, let's get her
cleaned up. All right.Copy !req
207. I didn't mean to upset you.Copy !req
208. Frank, um,Copy !req
209. could you stop scratching
yourself with the gun, please?Copy !req
210. - I'm itchy, I'm itchy.
- I-I bet.Copy !req
211. Probably from rolling around
in the grassCopy !req
212. outside of your apartment.Copy !req
213. No, I was rolling around
in the grassCopy !req
214. because I was itchy.Copy !req
215. The itch came first.Copy !req
216. Okay, well, why don't you
hand me the gun,Copy !req
217. - and I'll scratch you
with my fingers.
- Yeah.Copy !req
218. I'm not gonna hand you my gun,Copy !req
219. but I'll let you scratch.
You want to scratch me?Copy !req
220. - Go on. Yeah.
- Okay.Copy !req
221. - All right.
- Scratch me. See.Copy !req
222. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Do it down by the neck.Copy !req
223. - Frank, I—
- The back of the neck.
The back of the neck.Copy !req
224. Okay, but I just don't want
to get shot again, is all.Copy !req
225. The gun's not loaded.Copy !req
226. Yeah, that's what you said
last time, Frank.Copy !req
227. I got to take a piss.Copy !req
228. - Pull over.
- All right.Copy !req
229. Okay.Copy !req
230. - Goddamn it.Copy !req
231. This is not working.Copy !req
232. Should we just attack him
and take it?Copy !req
233. What? No.Copy !req
234. He'd mow us down like Scarface.
We can't come at him like that.Copy !req
235. - We'll spook him.
- Yeah.Copy !req
236. You know what?
He needs to be lulledCopy !req
237. into a false sense of security.Copy !req
238. You don't tell a dog
you're taking him to a vetCopy !req
239. to put him down.Copy !req
240. Right.Copy !req
241. You give that dog
the best day of his life,Copy !req
242. and then you turn out the lights
when he least suspects it.Copy !req
243. - Okay.Copy !req
244. Okay. Oh...Copy !req
245. Ooh.Copy !req
246. Ooh, that was a long wait.Copy !req
247. Ooh!Copy !req
248. Wow.Copy !req
249. Why is your mom driving
my mom's car?Copy !req
250. I don't know. Dude, they got
some weird arrangementCopy !req
251. worked out so your mom
can focus on smoking.Copy !req
252. Speaking of, I'm getting
choked to death back here.Copy !req
253. Mrs. Mac, do you mind, like,
cracking a window or something?Copy !req
254. No.Copy !req
255. Why not? I mean, it's ridiculous
to just sit in the smoke.Copy !req
256. 'Cause it's too drafty.
It's unhealthy.Copy !req
257. - Right.
- Unheal— What?Copy !req
258. Sorry, my mom's on
a new health kick.Copy !req
259. Hey, Mom, it's working.
You look great.Copy !req
260. Shut up.Copy !req
261. Can we, like speed up
or something?Copy !req
262. Another car just passed us.
Mom, that's, like, the 50th car.Copy !req
263. Why are you going so slow?Copy !req
264. Well, highways are scary.Copy !req
265. You're going 35.Copy !req
266. - I can see you're going 35.
- But— And everybody'sCopy !req
267. just in such a hurry.Copy !req
268. No, it's just the normal—Copy !req
269. It's the speed that people go
on the highway.Copy !req
270. Okay, maybe I should drive.
Mom, can I drive your car?Copy !req
271. - Can Mac drive?
- No.Copy !req
272. Ugh, this is my worst
nightmare, man.Copy !req
273. This is absolutely terrible.
How much further?Copy !req
274. Anyone know? Mac?Copy !req
275. How much further? Mac?Copy !req
276. Mac? Hello?Copy !req
277. My mom's finger
is up, which means "no talking".Copy !req
278. She's annoyed. It's best if weCopy !req
279. just keep it down
until the finger goes down,Copy !req
280. otherwise, she might burn us
with the cigarette lighter.Copy !req
281. This is my worst nightmareCopy !req
282. in my entire life.Copy !req
283. Okay, finger's down. Um, great.Copy !req
284. Uh, okay, Mrs. Kelly,
you're gonna want to stayCopy !req
285. on the Jersey Turnpike
until you hit 287.Copy !req
286. You want to take 287
towards Hamburg.Copy !req
287. Mm, no. That—
No, you just stay on the 206Copy !req
288. the whole way up.Copy !req
289. No, no, we're gonna,Copy !req
290. we're gonna hit Hamburg
on the way.Copy !req
291. Why are we going to Hamburg?Copy !req
292. We're gonna visit
my Uncle Donald.Copy !req
293. - Donald McDonald
of Hamburger, New Jersey?
- Hamburg.Copy !req
294. A bunch of old letters that
weren't even written to you?Copy !req
295. That's not a legacy, it's
a bunch of meaningless shit.Copy !req
296. Not as meaningless as a jar
full of teeth.Copy !req
297. - Ah! She got you.
She got you.
- Sorry, Mom, sorry, Mom.Copy !req
298. Sorry, Mom.
I didn't see the finger.Copy !req
299. No, her hand was not
in the air that time.Copy !req
300. - She burnt the shit out of me.
- You didn't even put your hand—Copy !req
301. - Oh, it's up now, it's up now.
- Yeah.Copy !req
302. Frank, we got a little
surprise for you, bud.Copy !req
303. What's that?Copy !req
304. Hamburgers.Copy !req
305. - Oh, hamburgers?Copy !req
306. Oh, that's one
of the best food there is.Copy !req
307. Yeah, yes, they really are.Copy !req
308. And, you know what, you can eat
them right here in the car.Copy !req
309. You know, once in a while,
they give me the runs.Copy !req
310. Yeah, that's why we put
that towel down for you, buddy.Copy !req
311. Mmm. Mmm!Copy !req
312. - Okay. All right.Copy !req
313. - Mmm.
- You want to take it easy?Copy !req
314. Goddamn. Just one bite
at a time,Copy !req
315. or you're gonna barf everywhere.Copy !req
316. - Mmm.
- Yeah, it's good, huh?Copy !req
317. Yeah, really hammering them
down there, huh, bud?Copy !req
318. Very good. Mmm.Copy !req
319. Oh!Copy !req
320. I almost ate my gun.Copy !req
321. I dipped it in the ketchup.Copy !req
322. Thought it was a french fry.Copy !req
323. Yeah, that is funny.Copy !req
324. Wow.Copy !req
325. Hey, you know what?Copy !req
326. I'm-I'm gonna pull over, Frank.Copy !req
327. I got to take a piss anyway.Copy !req
328. Again. Okay.Copy !req
329. - Well, Frank...
- What?Copy !req
330. Look where we are.Copy !req
331. We're at the bridge.Copy !req
332. Oh, I haven't been here
in forever.Copy !req
333. - Go check it out— Oh!
- Oh!
- Oh.Copy !req
334. - Ooh.
- Did-did you just slam your head
into the window?Copy !req
335. Yeah, I didn't realize
it was up.Copy !req
336. Well, were you gonna
dive out of it?Copy !req
337. Yeah, I was very excited.
I want to go.Copy !req
338. - All right.
- Go see the boys.Copy !req
339. - Have fun, buddy.
- Go see the boys.Copy !req
340. - Get after it.
- Okay.Copy !req
341. - Okay.
- I don't know how much
more of this I can take.Copy !req
342. Hey, we're almost there, Dee,
okay? He's getting tired.Copy !req
343. Let's let run him around
the bridge for a little while,Copy !req
344. - and then we have
one more stop, okay?
- Uh...Copy !req
345. Oh, he's pissing
on another hydrant.Copy !req
346. Okay. He's...Copy !req
347. literally turning into a dog.Copy !req
348. Yeah.Copy !req
349. I got to smash.Copy !req
350. You just smashed. You smashed,
like, three timesCopy !req
351. on the way up here.
We keep having to pull overCopy !req
352. - so you can smash. What—
- There is a lot of smashing.Copy !req
353. She's very regular.Copy !req
354. Oh, no, I'm out of paper towels.Copy !req
355. Oh, I wouldn't worry
about that, Mrs. Kelly.Copy !req
356. I'm sure my Uncle Donald
has toilet paper.Copy !req
357. You've been wiping
with paper towels?Copy !req
358. I hope everyoneCopy !req
359. brought their appetiteCopy !req
360. because I made quiche.Copy !req
361. Aw, that's really nice,
Uncle Donald,Copy !req
362. but we're kind of in a hurry.Copy !req
363. W-Well, that's a shame.Copy !req
364. We never get to see each other.Copy !req
365. Yeah, that is a shame,Copy !req
366. but I'm really here
about the letters.Copy !req
367. You know, the letters thatCopy !req
368. Grandpop wrote to you and Dad
during the war.Copy !req
369. Oh. Oh, yes, yes,
I-I-I have those letters.Copy !req
370. Oh, that's great.Copy !req
371. I was kind of hoping
they would pass down to me.Copy !req
372. You know, sort of like
a family heirloom.Copy !req
373. Well, that would make sense
because, well,Copy !req
374. they weren't actually
written to me.Copy !req
375. They were addressed
only, uh, to your dad.Copy !req
376. Grandpop didn't write to you?Copy !req
377. He-he liked your dad,
uh, more.Copy !req
378. Uh, you know, I was the, um,Copy !req
379. you know, "funny" one, you know.Copy !req
380. It's the reason
I never got married.Copy !req
381. Not something we talked about
back then, but...Copy !req
382. but i-it always made me feel,Copy !req
383. uh, a little, uh...Copy !req
384. different.Copy !req
385. Well, I-I'm sure
you can understandCopy !req
386. what that feels like, Ronald.Copy !req
387. No.Copy !req
388. So, the letters?Copy !req
389. - Oh, yes.
- Yeah?Copy !req
390. - Oh!
- Sure.Copy !req
391. Okay.Copy !req
392. Yeah, this is, uh,
this is great, Uncle Donald,Copy !req
393. 'cause it's really gonna tieCopy !req
394. a lot of things together
for me, you know?Copy !req
395. It's, uh— I have something
to pass down to my kids.Copy !req
396. It's-it's important
to have a legacy.Copy !req
397. Oh, yes. You know, I...Copy !req
398. I wouldn't know, though.
I, you know, I...Copy !req
399. I don't have
any children of my own.Copy !req
400. Oh, yeah.Copy !req
401. - What is
this guy's deal?
- Oh, here they are.Copy !req
402. It's, like,
everything you've ever wanted.Copy !req
403. Kind of sad, really, uh,
me keeping lettersCopy !req
404. that, uh, weren't even for me.Copy !req
405. You know. But, uh,Copy !req
406. I guess I just, uh,
wanted a connection, uh...Copy !req
407. with my dad.Copy !req
408. Yeah.Copy !req
409. That is sad.Copy !req
410. If I could just— Yeah.
Thank you.Copy !req
411. I mean, you know,
there's nothing more...Copy !req
412. more important in this world
than the connectionCopy !req
413. between a father and a son.Copy !req
414. Well, besides the connection
between a son and a mother.Copy !req
415. Right, Mom?Copy !req
416. She's smashing.Copy !req
417. - Yeah, she took off, man.
- Yeah, she had to smash.Copy !req
418. Well, I guess we could wait
for her in the car.Copy !req
419. This is so annoying.Copy !req
420. I mean, you're gonna
take time out of my day,Copy !req
421. and you have everything you've
ever dreamed of right here,Copy !req
422. but we're gonna just blow
right past it, aren't we?Copy !req
423. It's probably time to go, huh?Copy !req
424. - Well, uh, o-okay.
- Yeah.Copy !req
425. Okay, well-well, uh,
you know, hey,Copy !req
426. if you ever want to, uh,
you know, hang out,Copy !req
427. you know, we could throw
the old football around.Copy !req
428. Ah, I don't really like
playing football.Copy !req
429. It's kind of for jocks.Copy !req
430. - It's all he ever talks about
- No, it's like—Copy !req
431. is wanting to have
a catch with his dad, so—Copy !req
432. Nah, 'cause remember
we were talking about howCopy !req
433. it was like a... for jocks?Copy !req
434. - Uh, no. That never happened.
- Oh.Copy !req
435. Uh, yeah, well, uh,
we could read.Copy !req
436. - We could read.
- Oh, but, like, he can't read.Copy !req
437. - Imagine that. Imagine that.
- He can't read, so...Copy !req
438. Yeah, but he's not talking
about me, he's talking aboutCopy !req
439. - bonding with you.
- Yeah, like...Copy !req
440. But we're gonna
blow right past this, huh?Copy !req
441. Reading is for nerds, so...Copy !req
442. - Yeah, is that what it is?
- Yeah.Copy !req
443. - Uh, cards?
- Uh, well,Copy !req
444. the thing about cards
is, like, with the...Copy !req
445. the jacks and the queens
and the kings and, like,Copy !req
446. I don't like
celebrating royalty.Copy !req
447. - You know, he-he knows that.
- Oh, my God, dude.Copy !req
448. - Oh, my God, man.
- You know that.
We've talked about that.Copy !req
449. You're driving me crazy, dude.
All right, fine, let's go.Copy !req
450. - Bye-bye.
- Okay, maybe you guys
can swap phone numbers or...Copy !req
451. - I think that would be weird.
- No? No, not gonna do it?Copy !req
452. - That would be weird. Okay.
- Fine, then this was a good
waste of our time, wasn't it?Copy !req
453. - Well, there it is.
- The ocean.Copy !req
454. - Yep.
- Mm.Copy !req
455. Beautiful.
Probably brings backCopy !req
456. a lot of good memories.Copy !req
457. - Right, Frank?
- Absolutely.Copy !req
458. - Yeah.
- You guys, uh, mind if I...Copy !req
459. - Oh, no. Of course. No, please.
Please. Yeah.
- Please. Yeah.Copy !req
460. Take that you, cesspool.Copy !req
461. Polluted sack of shit.Copy !req
462. You know, Dee, I kind of feel
like we did a good thing here.Copy !req
463. I do, too.
We gave him a good day.Copy !req
464. - Mm-hmm.
- For him.Copy !req
465. Not for a normal person.Copy !req
466. - Yeah. Jesus.Copy !req
467. Right.Copy !req
468. You all done, bud?Copy !req
469. - Yeah. Thanks, guys.
- Yeah.Copy !req
470. - Good. Hey, oh, absolutely.
- Yeah.Copy !req
471. - You got it.
- Hey, listen,
where to now, Frank?Copy !req
472. - We want to take you somewhere.
- Uh, no, it's okay. I get it.Copy !req
473. I-I thought it was
a cash grab at first,Copy !req
474. but I see where you're going.Copy !req
475. The hamburger, playing
with Duncan under the bridge,Copy !req
476. and now the beach.Copy !req
477. A perfect day
can't last forever.Copy !req
478. I know why we're here.Copy !req
479. Oh. You do?Copy !req
480. Gosh.Copy !req
481. Thanks for making it
so easy on us.Copy !req
482. - We expected more resistance.
- Yeah.Copy !req
483. Well, I guess hung on
a little bit too long.Copy !req
484. - A little bit.
- And afterwards,
you guys can have the money.Copy !req
485. - You mean it?
- Really?Copy !req
486. Yeah. Here.Copy !req
487. Oh. Gosh.Copy !req
488. I-I got to say, this-this wentCopy !req
489. - so much more smoothly than I...
- Yeah, it really did.Copy !req
490. Uh, just do it when I'm looking
out at the ocean.Copy !req
491. Huh?Copy !req
492. Ah, don't be coy.
I had a good run.Copy !req
493. - What are you—
- And it's really goodCopy !req
494. you didn't do it
in front of Charlie.Copy !req
495. That was a class move.Copy !req
496. Just put me down quick.Copy !req
497. Put you down? Wha...Copy !req
498. Oh, you know what?
I think I'm gonna run,Copy !req
499. and then you do
what you have to do.Copy !req
500. But if you shoot me in the leg,
come over and finish me off,Copy !req
501. because I don't want
to lay there and suffer.Copy !req
502. - Actually, here,
I'm gonna take...
- What?Copy !req
503. What the hell are you doing?Copy !req
504. I'm gonna go natural,
because I've seenCopy !req
505. too many guys die
and take a shit in their pants.Copy !req
506. I don't want that.
And bury my poop.Copy !req
507. Or just kick some sand over it.Copy !req
508. 'Cause— And then you can do
what you want to do.Copy !req
509. You can float me out into
the ocean and let sharks eat me.Copy !req
510. Or you can leave me
on the ground,Copy !req
511. gruesome for the kids to see.Copy !req
512. Oh, ugh. Oh, my God.Copy !req
513. We are not gonna
kill you, Frank.Copy !req
514. - Huh?
- What, did you thinkCopy !req
515. we were just gonna shoot you
right here on the beach?Copy !req
516. I mean,
there-there's people around.Copy !req
517. I'm actually surprised
they didn't runCopy !req
518. - when you started
shooting the ocean.
- I-I'm not.Copy !req
519. It's the Jersey Shore.
But good God, man.Copy !req
520. Well, if you're not gonna
snuff me out,Copy !req
521. what the hell are you doing?Copy !req
522. We were giving you
one last day with your gun.Copy !req
523. Yeah, it's time
to let it go, Frank.Copy !req
524. You were stealing my gun?Copy !req
525. - Well—
- Screw that.Copy !req
526. No, it's too dangerous, Frank.Copy !req
527. You're out of control
with that thing.Copy !req
528. By the way,
you're out of the will again.Copy !req
529. - What?
- Why? Just because of the gun?
- Yeah.Copy !req
530. Exactly. Because I don't
trust you two guys.Copy !req
531. I mean, if you're in the will,
who knows?Copy !req
532. You may wind up
shooting me in the back.Copy !req
533. - Aah!
- You just told us
to shoot you in the back!Copy !req
534. That's different.
It's not the same thing.Copy !req
535. Take me back to Philly.Copy !req
536. You get an Uber.Copy !req
537. - Yeah.
- Get in the car.Copy !req
538. - Goddamn it.
- Go on. Let's go.
- Dee,Copy !req
539. - why'd you let him snatch
that thing back?
- I-I...Copy !req
540. All right, let's go.Copy !req
541. - Just barge right in, Mom.
- O-Okay.Copy !req
542. Don't-don't be shy, okay?Copy !req
543. Bunny?Copy !req
544. Candy?Copy !req
545. - Are you home?
- Which one is the can?Copy !req
546. There's probably, like,
a million bathrooms.Copy !req
547. Just go find a bathroom,
Mrs. Mac.Copy !req
548. - I don't remember those
being your sisters' names.Copy !req
549. No, it's not their names.
They had their names changed.Copy !req
550. Oh. How do they afford
to live like this?Copy !req
551. T-They're doing
some, like, stupid,Copy !req
552. like, social media thing.Copy !req
553. I-I don't know, I guess
they're making a killing on it.Copy !req
554. Hey! Candy, Bunny!Copy !req
555. - Candy...
- Oh, my God.Copy !req
556. Mom, what are you doing here?Copy !req
557. Well, we just wanted
to drive up—Copy !req
558. Why'd you bring Dirt Grub?Copy !req
559. Oh, yeah, hi.
Nice to see you, too.Copy !req
560. Shut up, fag!Copy !req
561. Why'd you bring your fag friend?Copy !req
562. Yeah, why is Mac here?Copy !req
563. - This is so distasteful.Copy !req
564. Uh, dude, uh...Copy !req
565. You know what? I'm not
gonna argue with you guys.Copy !req
566. - Oh, you're not?
- Okay? No, I'm just hereCopy !req
567. - for the teeth.
- No, you can't have them.Copy !req
568. Yeah, you can't
have them, Charlie.Copy !req
569. - You can't have them.
- Mom gave them to us.Copy !req
570. Well, what do you even care
about the teeth?Copy !req
571. I-I thought you always said
they were weird and gross.Copy !req
572. - They are weird and gross.
- Yeah, super gross,Copy !req
573. but people like that stuff,
so we need them.Copy !req
574. - We need them.
- Need them for what?Copy !req
575. ASMR, dickweed.Copy !req
576. Yeah. ASMR.Copy !req
577. What is that? What even is that?Copy !req
578. We stick our hands in the jar.Copy !req
579. People pay to watch us
stick our hand in the jar.Copy !req
580. - They pay for that shit.
- Yeah.Copy !req
581. They like the noise
of the teeth,Copy !req
582. and they give us a lot
of money on OnlyFans.Copy !req
583. - Like, a lot of money.
- What?Copy !req
584. - More than you could
ever imagine.
- Yeah.Copy !req
585. All you're doing is sticking
your hands in teethCopy !req
586. and people pay you enough
to live like this?Copy !req
587. - We obviously take
our tops off. Like...
- Obviously.Copy !req
588. - Oh, girls.
- Oh, my God.Copy !req
589. - Shut up, slut.
- You're literally a slut.Copy !req
590. All right, you know what? Give
me the teeth. Give me the teeth.Copy !req
591. No. Finders keepers, bitch.Copy !req
592. - Finders keepers.
- You did not find them!Copy !req
593. - Mom gave them to you!
- Yeah, she did.Copy !req
594. - Okay, we're her favorite.
- I clogged the toilet.Copy !req
595. - What the hell? Gross.
- Who is this old lady
clogging our toilet?Copy !req
596. That's my mommy.Copy !req
597. - Gross, Mac!
- Gross, Mac!Copy !req
598. Why did you clog our toilet?Copy !req
599. Why'd you clog our toilet,
old lady?Copy !req
600. There was no TP.Copy !req
601. If there was no TP,
what did you wipe with?Copy !req
602. The letters.Copy !req
603. You wiped your butt
with the lettersCopy !req
604. that Grandpop sent Dad and then
flushed them down the toilet?Copy !req
605. Yeah.Copy !req
606. - Oh, my God.Copy !req
607. This is so weird, guys.
You got to go.Copy !req
608. - All right, you know what?
- No. No.Copy !req
609. Hey, hey. Put that down.Copy !req
610. This is gonna be
the new Kelly family heirloom,Copy !req
611. and I'm gonna put
all my teeth in itCopy !req
612. and all of Mom's teeth in it
and none of yours.Copy !req
613. Okay.Copy !req
614. Oh, uh, yep.Copy !req
615. - Yep. Yep.
- You got to stopCopy !req
616. doing that. You're not gonna
have any teeth left.Copy !req
617. You sure you don't want
to pop a couple in?Copy !req
618. You know, you can be
a part of my legacy, dude.Copy !req
619. I-I feel like you should be.Copy !req
620. - No, I-I'm good.
- Yeah?Copy !req
621. - Yeah, I'm good.
- All right, I'll tell you what.Copy !req
622. When one-one falls out,
go ahead and toss it in.Copy !req
623. - It's cool.
- It won't.Copy !req
624. Yeah. There. Take that, lock.Copy !req
625. Oh, what the hell, man?Copy !req
626. And the door wasn't even locked.Copy !req
627. You're paying
for that door, Frank.Copy !req
628. All right, all right.Copy !req
629. Well, this is great.
This is just great.Copy !req
630. You know, like, now
what are we supposed to all putCopy !req
631. - our teeth in?
- Our faces?Copy !req
632. - What are you talking about?
- I'm talking about our legacy.Copy !req
633. You know?
I can't hold onto it, man.Copy !req
634. Legacy? You want to talk legacy?
You know what our legacy is?Copy !req
635. Spending our lives
in this goddamn barCopy !req
636. with a lunatic man
who acts like a dogCopy !req
637. and handles
his gun like a maniac!Copy !req
638. Oh, fine.Copy !req
639. I see where this
pity party's headed.Copy !req
640. If you're gonna be
crybabies about it,Copy !req
641. all right, take my gun.Copy !req
642. - Ow! Ow!
- Shit!Copy !req
643. Shit.Copy !req
644. Well, there you have it, Frank.Copy !req
645. You've officially shot
everyone in the bar.Copy !req