iCarly 2x3

Directed by David Kendall

Stephen Full as Lenny • Piper Mackenzie Harris as Emily Millford • Teddy Lane Jr. as Sam's Boss • Jennifer O'Dell as Kathy Millford • Cameron Palatas as Student in the Hallway

Sam owes Carly and Freddie $526, so she gets a job to earn the money, and pay them back. Carly, Sam, and Freddie make a broadcast on iCarly to all their fans to donate money to Sam. However, they find out its illegal to solicit money over the internet. Meanwhile Spencer tries to impress an attractive single mom by helping her daughter sell fudge balls, an equivalent to Girl Scout cookies, but two scouts stole Spencer's place at the market. Spencer comes up with the idea to send every iCarly fan who sent them money to send them fudge balls. Carly and Freddie then hire someone to give the money they earned to Sam in a tip. At the end, everyone enjoys what Sam got with her money except Spencer.

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Subtitle languages: English • Spanish • Brazilian Portuguese

Note: you must use specific languages with their specific pages/discord channels.

1. - Um, are you having

2. some kind of lip seizure?

3. - No, I'm trying to blend

4. coconut lip gloss

5. and pineapple lip gloss

6. to create a piña colada flavor.

7. I realize this isn't attractive.

8. - Actually, it kind of is.

9. So, does it taste

10. like piña colada?

11. - Do you wanna find out?

12. - Yes.

13. Eww.

14. - Well?

15. - You bent my teeth.

16. - Hey.

17. Hey, can I borrow 30 bucks?

18. I gotta pay a cab driver.

19. - You took a cab to school?

20. - I had to.

21. My mom loaned her car to some

22. fisherman and I missed the bus.

23. - A cab here from your house

24. doesn't cost $30.

25. - It does if you make the guy

26. stop and buy you

27. a breakfast burrito.

28. - Come on. 30 bucks.

29. He's got the meter running.

30. - Here's 20.

31. - All I have is a 10

32. and I need it—

33. You know, I'm getting a little

34. tired of Sam "borrowing" money.

35. - Why the air quotes

36. around "borrowing?"

37. - 'Cause she never

38. pays us back.

39. - True. But don't be upset.

40. At least your lips

41. smell all girly and sweet.

42. - They do not.

43. I wiped it off.

44. I just think it's kind of lame

45. for her to always

46. be hitting us up for cash.

47. - Who's always hitting you up

48. for cash?

49. - You are.

50. - Carly, am I always—

51. - Yes.

52. - Okay, maybe I borrow money

53. a lot, but don't I always

54. pay back every—

55. - No.

56. - All right. You guys figure out

57. exactly how much I owe you

58. and I'm gonna pay you back

59. every dime of it.

60. Every dime.

61. - Do you think she will?

62. - I'll believe it when I see it.

63. - Hey, here's that DXC cable

64. you wanted.

65. - Oh, yeah. Thanks.

66. - Piña colada?

67. - Hah!

68. In five, four,

69. three, two—

70. - Ready?

71. - Let's do this.

72. - There they go.

73. - Up to the ceiling.

74. And... pop!

75. - Not our best idea.

76. - No.

77. - 'Sup?

78. - Hey.

79. - You ready to rehearse

80. some "iCarly?"

81. - Yup.

82. - Is Sam here?

83. - No, she's on her way. We're

84. gonna be upstairs rehearsing.

85. - Don't harm yourselves.

86. - Coming.

87. Well, hello there.

88. And hello there.

89. I'm Spencer.

90. - Hi.

91. We live down the block

92. and I have been taking

93. Emily around to sell

94. Sunshine Girl fudge balls.

95. - I love fudge balls.

96. - Did you hear that, sweetie?

97. Why don't you ask the nice man

98. if he'd like to buy a box?

99. - Yeah, just ask me.

100. I'm easy.

101. - Oh, no. Emily.

102. - Did I... did I say something?

103. - It's not you.

104. She's just so shy.

105. She's trying to sell

106. the most fudge balls

107. in her troop so she can win

108. this really cool bike.

109. - Oh.

110. I could help her sell 'em.

111. - Oh, I couldn't ask you

112. to do that.

113. - Oh, come on, my little sister

114. Carly was a Sunshine Girl.

115. I used to help her

116. sell fudge balls all the time.

117. - And you're sure

118. you wanna help Emily?

119. - How tall is your husband?

120. - I'm single.

121. - I really wanna help Emily.

122. - So, Fredwad,

123. did you figure out

124. how much money I owe you guys?

125. - You owe Carly and me

126. exactly $526.

127. - No way it's that much.

128. - Show her.

129. Now, if you look

130. at the graph,

131. you'll see that your borrowing

132. really took off two years ago

133. during July, then—

134. Ah!

135. Oh, you squished

136. my tripod finger.

137. - That's not something

138. a cool person says.

139. - I don't care.

140. Are you gonna pay us back

141. or what?

142. - I was, but I didn't know

143. it was gonna be that much.

144. - So how much do you have?

145. - Um, let's see.

146. I've got... 14 bucks,

147. a double A battery...

148. some string, a fork,

149. and...

150. I think that's an olive.

151. - The olive's moving.

152. - I got it.

153. - Emily, come here, sweetie.

154. Spencer is going to tell you

155. how you guys can sell

156. a whole bunch of fudge balls,

157. okay?

158. - Okay, Emily, you and I

159. are gonna sit at this table

160. and whenever people walk by us—

161. - Oh, no, no, Emily. I—

162. - Oh, no, you go calm her down.

163. I got the fudge balls.

164. - Thanks.

165. - Mm-hmm.

166. - Emily. Emily.

167. - Hey there, fudge balls?

168. - No.

169. - No? Okay.

170. How about you, ma'am?

171. Sunshine Girl fudge balls?

172. - No, thanks.

173. - No. Hey, come on.

174. We got peanut butter.

175. We got caramel, marshmallow.

176. - No.

177. - No? Who's in a mood

178. for some fudge balls?

179. Girls, what's up?

180. Hey there,

181. maybe you girls didn't notice,

182. but I'm set up right over there.

183. I'm trying to help a little girl

184. win a bike.

185. - Maybe we want a bike too.

186. - Yeah, right.

187. See, here's the thing.

188. I don't think

189. there's enough customers

190. around here for all of us.

191. And since I was here first,

192. I was thinking maybe

193. you guys could move—

194. - In five, four, three, two—

195. - I'm Sam.

196. - I'm Carly.

197. - And this is "iCarly."

198. - The only web show

199. that makes you laugh

200. and prevents heart disease.

201. - So kick back with a pound

202. of bacon and enjoy the show.

203. - To start off, Sam and I

204. are gonna perform a play

205. that she wrote herself

206. for drama class.

207. - Miss Levinson gave me

208. a D minus.

209. The play is called

210. "The Prisoner Who Just Wanted

211. Some Soup and the Man

212. Who Refused to Give Him Some."

213. - And action.

214. - Just give me some soup!

215. - I ain't gonna give you

216. no soup!

217. - Just give me some soup!

218. - I ain't gonna give you

219. no soup!

220. - Just give me some soup!

221. - I ain't gonna give you

222. no soup!

223. - Scene.

224. - Thank you.

225. - Hey, look, found a dollar

226. on the floor.

227. - Now, you just need

228. to find about 500 more.

229. - Watch it, Fredward.

230. - Sam and Freddie

231. have been fighting

232. about money this week.

233. - 'Cause Sam owes Carly and me

234. over 500 bucks.

235. - So if you wanna help me out

236. with that little problem,

237. send me some cash,

238. care of Ridgeway Middle School

239. here in Seattle.

240. - They ain't gonna send you

241. no money!

242. - They'll send me some money!

243. - They ain't gonna send you

244. no money!

245. - They'll send me some money!

246. - They ain't gonna send you

247. no money!

248. - They'll send me some money!

249. - I forgive you

250. for what you did yesterday,

251. but we need to talk.

252. - Get out of here.

253. - All I was trying to do

254. is help a little girl

255. sell enough fudge balls

256. to win a bike

257. and I don't think

258. it was very sunshiny

259. of you girls to pick up my table

260. and just throw it

261. into the street like a—

262. no, wait! Wait!

263. No, not towards the car!

264. Oh, gee, ow!

265. Oh, my fudge balls!

266. This isn't over.

267. - Sam.

268. - What?

269. - Principal Franklin

270. wants you now.

271. - What does he know about?

272. - I don't know.

273. - Oh, man.

274. Tell him I moved to Switzerland.

275. I'm gonna make a break for it.

276. - Wait.

277. He knew you'd try to run.

278. He's got teachers

279. posted at every door

280. all over the building.

281. Hey.

282. - Tell Carly to meet me at

283. Franklin's office

284. in two minutes.

285. - What did you do?

286. - I don't know.

287. But he always goes easier on me

288. when Carly's around.

289. It reminds him I'm not all bad.

290. Oh, wait.

291. - What?

292. - Lend me five bucks?

293. - No!

294. - Hold on,

295. I'm not ready!

296. I'm waiting for someone.

297. Carly Shay

298. to the principal's office!

299. Principal Franklin.

300. You're looking well.

301. You join a gym?

302. - Sam—

303. - What happened?

304. - Carly, look,

305. Principal Franklin,

306. it is my best friend Carly

307. who loves me and sees

308. the value in me as a person.

309. Right, Carls?

310. Tell the nice man.

311. - Tell him what?

312. - I sent you a text.

313. - Oh.

314. Sam did nothing wrong.

315. She didn't do the thing

316. you're mad about.

317. She's not that kind of... girf.

318. - Girf?

319. - Girl.

320. - But you wrote girf.

321. - Maybe you girfs

322. have an explanation for these?

323. - What are those?

324. - Letters. Sent to you

325. here at this school.

326. Apparently, they have

327. something to do with "iCarly."

328. Each one contains cash.

329. - $10 from Sarah Cloody

330. in Chicago?

331. - Two bucks from Louis Beckerman

332. in New York.

333. Two bucks, way to dig deep,

334. Louis.

335. - This is serious.

336. - Why?

337. Now, I can pay you

338. and Freddie back.

339. - No.

340. - You can't solicit money

341. from kids over the Internet.

342. It's against the law.

343. - This could get us

344. in big trouble.

345. - I suggest you return

346. all this money immediately.

347. - Oh, man, do you know

348. how long it will take us

349. to send every one of these kids

350. their money back?

351. - More mail.

352. - We gotta send

353. all those back too?

354. - That's a lot of work

355. for two girfs.

356. - I hate this.

357. I hate this so much.

358. - I can't believe this many

359. "iCarly" fans sent money in

360. just 'cause Sam

361. asked them to.

362. - It's gonna take us days

363. to send it all back.

364. - Or weeks.

365. Hey, Sam.

366. How are you coming with those

367. return address labels?

368. - Good. Real good.

369. - You're not making labels.

370. You're looking at trampolines.

371. - I'm sorry.

372. I just want one so bad.

373. - Well, you know

374. when you can have a trampoline?

375. - When?

376. - Never!

377. - I gotta go.

378. - Oh, no.

379. - You're not gonna go

380. take a nap while we sit here

381. working the mail—

382. - I'm not going to take a nap.

383. I got a job.

384. - You got a job?

385. - Where?

386. - At Chili My Bowl.

387. - Chili?

388. - Yeah.

389. I figure if I gotta work,

390. it might as well be

391. around something I love.

392. - Isn't Chili My Bowl

393. the place where some guy

394. found a finger in his chili

395. last year?

396. - It was a thumb.

397. - Hey, Sam.

398. - I'm in a bad mood.

399. - You too.

400. Hi.

401. - Hey.

402. You sell a bunch of fudge balls?

403. - No.

404. - How come

405. he's selling fudge balls?

406. - He's trying to help

407. this little Sunshine Girl

408. win a new bike.

409. Hot mom.

410. - Ah.

411. - Why are you such a mess?

412. - 'Cause since those mean girls

413. pushed me out of my spot,

414. I tried moving

415. my fudge ball operation

416. down by the shipyard.

417. - And?

418. - The dockworkers wanted

419. no part of me or my fudge balls.

420. They threw clams at me.

421. - Aw.

422. - Yeah.

423. - You know, you don't have

424. to win that bike

425. just to get that Sunshine

426. Girl's mom to go out with you.

427. - I know but I wanna sell

428. more than those rotten girls

429. at the market.

430. Hey, are you hungry?

431. - Yeah, you bring home dinner?

432. - Ah-huh.

433. - What's in here?

434. - Clams.

435. - Hey, lady.

436. - Yes, can I help you?

437. - I said I wanted hot sauce

438. and there wasn't no hot sauce

439. on my tray.

440. - Sorry.

441. Here's some hot sauce.

442. - You should have put it

443. on my tray in the first place.

444. - You know where I wanna put it

445. right now?

446. - You watch your mouth.

447. - No, you watch your mouth

448. before I put my fist in it!

449. - Hey, hey, hey, hey!

450. You say you're sorry

451. to the customer.

452. - But he—

453. - Apologize.

454. - I'm so very sorry.

455. - You—

456. - Calm, calm, calm, calm.

457. You wanna keep this job?

458. - No, but I need to.

459. - Then behave.

460. Now, come here.

461. Here.

462. Now, go clean the men's room.

463. - What?

464. - Go clean—

465. - No, no, no, no, no.

466. Don't say it again.

467. I, uh—I mean, can't you get

468. a guy employee to do it?

469. - Now.

470. - Oh.

471. - Hey, what goes on?

472. - What's up?

473. - Hey.

474. What are you doing here so late?

475. - Oh, I just thought

476. I'd stop by

477. on my way home from work.

478. Oh, and Freddie,

479. your mom is looking for you.

480. Something about a sick relative.

481. - What? I gotta go.

482. - Which one of his relatives

483. is sick?

484. - None.

485. I made that up so he'd leave.

486. - Why?

487. - 'Cause I don't want Freddie

488. to see me... cry.

489. I don't like working.

490. I don't know how people do it.

491. It's horrible.

492. They don't let you sleep,

493. or watch TV, or go online.

494. And... they expect you

495. to be nice to all the customers.

496. And I'm not even allowed

497. to eat the chili.

498. Do you know what it's like

499. to be me, surrounded

500. by giant pots of chili

501. and not allowed to eat it?

502. - I can't stand to see you

503. like this.

504. You have to quit.

505. - No, I can't.

506. I promised myself

507. I wouldn't quit

508. till I pay back every penny

509. I owe you and Freddie.

510. I had to clean... urinals.

511. Boys are so gross!

512. - You'll be okay.

513. - My mom says

514. none of my relatives—

515. Carly!

516. Carly, come down here.

517. Carly! Carly!

518. - Spencer,

519. it's 6:00 in the morning.

520. - I know,

521. but I've got big news.

522. - I can't take you seriously

523. when you're wearing

524. duck pyjama pants.

525. Duck boxers?

526. - Tell me why you're sending

527. all this money

528. back to your fans.

529. - 'Cause, Principal Franklin

530. says it's not legal

531. to solicit money from kids

532. over the Internet.

533. - Principal Franklin didn't go

534. to law school like your big bro.

535. - You went for three days.

536. - But I kept this book.

537. And it says,

538. "It is illegal to solicit money

539. over the Internet from persons

540. under the age of 18."

541. - We know that.

542. - "Unless you provide

543. a product or service in return."

544. - But we didn't provide

545. a product or service.

546. - But you're going to.

547. - Spencer.

548. - "iCarly" is gonna provide

549. a product to every fan

550. that sent you guys money.

551. - What products?

552. - Fudge balls!

553. - Fudge balls?

554. - Ah-huh. Balls of fudge.

555. - And we can keep

556. all the money?

557. - Yup. It's totally legal.

558. So Spencer called Socko,

559. got a bunch of guys to come over

560. and they're sending out

561. fudge balls right now

562. to every "iCarly" fan

563. that sent us money.

564. Say, "Yay."

565. - But wait,

566. the fudge balls aren't free.

567. - No, but when you subtract

568. the cost of the fudge balls

569. from the money our fans sent us,

570. we still make $541 in profit.

571. And Spencer wins the bike

572. for the little Sunshine Girl.

573. - But wait.

574. What do we do with the money?

575. - Well, we get to keep $541

576. and Sam owes us $526,

577. so we give Sam the $526

578. and then she can pay us back

579. and quit her stupid job.

580. - But wait.

581. - Stop saying, "But wait."

582. - Sam is not gonna take

583. the money from us.

584. - Why wouldn't she?

585. - It's a pride thing.

586. It's why she won't quit her job.

587. If we just give her the money,

588. she won't feel like

589. she really paid us back.

590. - Yeah.

591. Okay, how about this?

592. - Yeah.

593. - We find some adult

594. that Sam doesn't know.

595. - Okay.

596. - And we give him the 526 bucks

597. and then he gives

598. the money to Sam

599. as a tip at the restaurant.

600. - That's brilliant.

601. - Isn't it?

602. - But wait.

603. - What?

604. - That leaves

605. an extra 15 bucks.

606. - Yeah, five for me, five for

607. Sam, and five for you. Go nuts.

608. Oh, look at—

609. can you see this?

610. Oh, look at these fries.

611. I have the money.

612. I have money.

613. I have money.

614. I have the money.

615. I have the money.

616. Oh, oh, look. Oh, look.

617. Oh, look at this.

618. Oh, oh, oh, oh, hey, look.

619. I got money!

620. Money, money, money, money!

621. Woo-hoo. Woo!

622. Yeah. Yeah!

623. - Hi.

624. I just wanted you girls to know

625. that I won the bike.

626. And because I am a grownup,

627. I forgive you

628. for behaving so rudely to me.

629. Take care.

630. On the other hand,

631. check out how cool this bike is!

632. Oh, I won the fancy new bike

633. and you didn't.

634. How you jerks like me now?

635. Woo!

636. Oh, I'm out of control!

637. Oh, geez, I'm sorry. Oh!

638. - What goes on, peoples?

639. - Hey, where have you been?

640. - Oh, I had little bid-ness

641. to take care of.

642. - Bid-ness?

643. - Yup. I kind of came into

644. a little money.

645. - Like enough to pay us back

646. the $526 you owe us?

647. - Like exactly that much.

648. - Awesome.

649. - Great.

650. - So, where is it?

651. - I spent it.

652. - What?

653. - Sam, you did not.

654. - Yeah, I did.

655. - You were supposed

656. to pay us back.

657. - Oh, you guys

658. don't need that money.

659. - I can't believe this.

660. - You're insane.

661. - I may be insane

662. but I bought something

663. that's gonna be a lot of fun

664. for all three of us.

665. - What'd you buy?

666. - Oh, great!

667. - Oh, yeah.

668. - Yeah!

669. - Surprise.

670. - We're bouncing.

671. - Yeah!

672. - Where is the couch?

673. - Hey, Carly, Sam, and Freddie.

674. My name is Matt.

675. I'm gonna juggle diapers.

676. Here we go.

677. I love you guys' show so much.

678. Keep on keeping on.

679. Thanks for watching.

680. Say goodbye.

681. Say goodbye.

682. Mmm!