1. Who is it?
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2. It's Tom.
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3. Tom, your husband?
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4. What's he doing here?
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5. Uh, what's going on?
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6. I'm sorry, I know I'm
not supposed to be here,
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7. but Evelyn's school
contract's due tomorrow.
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8. I knew I was forgetting something.
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9. Let me, uh, find a pen.
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10. Hey. Hey.
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11. Not quite sure what Emily post
recommends in this situation,
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12. but I'm Tom.
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13. Damien. Hey.
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14. Sorry to intrude.
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15. I just—I wasn't quite sure
when she'd be coming home.
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16. No problem.
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17. Thank you so much for catching this.
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18. Yeah.
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19. Well, I'll get out of your way,
it was good to meet you,
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20. and I'll see you later,
hon.
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21. Bye.
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22. So...
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23. Seems like a nice guy.
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24. Ooh.
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25. Jules, you okay?
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26. No, my stomach.
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27. Here. Lie down.
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28. Ow!
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29. Try to—
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30. get Tom.
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31. Ow! Tom!
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32. You know what would be perfect?
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33. Hmm? French toast tower.
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34. You still go to Mickey's?
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35. What's your cholesterol?
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36. It's my one vice. I'm keeping it.
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37. As much as I would love
to clog my arteries,
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38. I have a 10:00 ct and I
still have to race home,
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39. get changed.
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40. Maybe you could keep
some clothes here.
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41. Maybe I could.
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42. He's just trying to
get into your skirts.
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43. And I don't mean metaphorically.
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44. Well, he's got the legs for it.
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45. So I will see you tonight?
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46. Yeah.
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47. Bye, House.
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48. Have a nice day.
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49. "Have a nice day."
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50. How civilized.
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51. I said I'd stay t of it.
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52. What?
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53. Nothing.
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54. Clearly something.
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55. Nope.
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56. House, on a list of your attributes,
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57. there's nothing that
even rhymes with "coy."
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58. Okay, I may have seen
something in the fridge.
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59. Like the end of your relationship.
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60. She put the milk in the
door and not on the shelf.
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61. It's not a big deal.
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62. You hate that she did that,
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63. but you didn't say anything.
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64. You're trying to get us to fight.
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65. No, I'm trying to help.
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66. If you got an issue, let her know.
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67. I should have known
that you weren't done
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68. sabotaging this.
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69. Fine. Stew in your irritation.
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70. And sure, last time
it bubbled over
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71. into resentment and rage,
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72. leading ultimately
to a painful divorce
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73. that neither of you ever
really recovered from,
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74. but I'm sure this
time it'll be great.
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75. Interesting case.
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76. 35-year-old woman with
fever and abdominal pain.
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77. E.R. ruled out all
the usual suspects.
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78. Stop before you
interest me to death.
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79. And she's in an open marriage.
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80. That's not interesting.
It's just weird.
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81. Know what's weirder?
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82. That other humans are
monogamous in the first place.
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83. No other species on the planet
mates for life
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84. and if you're gonna bring up swans,
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85. they cheat like everybody else.
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86. They just have better
pr than rabbits.
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87. Animals also eat their young
and kill their rivals.
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88. That make it weird
that most of us don't?
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89. Says the guy whose
opposable thumbs have been
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90. all over how many women
who aren't his wife?
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91. A functional open marriage
is like a Unicorn.
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92. It's a mythical creature
that doesn't exist.
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93. Someone always ends up unhappy.
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94. Our patient's unhappy becau
se she's suffering
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95. from an intestinal blockage.
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96. Boring.
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97. Then we have to find a
reason to rule it out.
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98. What about herpes colitis?
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99. She picks up the infection
from one of her partners.
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100. It takes root in her colon.
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101. Std panel was clean.
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102. Chances are, this couple was
unhappy in the first place.
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103. This is their attempt
to save something
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104. that never—
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105. go on.
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106. Herpes might not
register
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107. if she was exposed in
the last six weeks.
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108. But it would show up
on a barium enema.
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109. Wait.
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110. You're gonna do it?
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111. Gotta see if our
patient's a Unicorn
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112. or just a slutty horse.
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113. Think how much fun
Taub could be having.
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114. Barium coats the inner
lining of your colon.
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115. Lets us get a good look
at it on the X-ray.
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116. I can get somebody
else to pick up Evelyn.
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117. I feel like i'm abandoning you.
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118. I'm on painkillers.
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119. I'd rather this not
be what you think of
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120. every time you look at my butt.
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121. Okay, roll onto your side.
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122. It's fill 'er up time.
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123. So is Evelyn his new squeeze?
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124. She's our daughter.
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125. Must be interesting
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126. growing up in a production of Oh!
Calcutta!
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127. She's six.
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128. She knows as much
about our sex life
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129. as any other kid her age.
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130. You can explain that
she's the reason
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131. the two of you stayed married.
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132. You've been in the
room five minutes.
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133. You got us all figured out.
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134. Of course, you left out
the part
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135. where we love each other
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136. and we want to grow old together.
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137. But you just don't want
to be young together.
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138. Look, when you think about it,
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139. tons of couples do what we do.
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140. It's just that with most of them,
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141. one spouse doesn't know about it.
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142. We decided things work better
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143. when people tell
each other the truth.
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144. Tank's full.
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145. I'll page the radiology elves.
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146. I'm not saying I hate it.
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147. Just doesn't go with your eyes.
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148. You hate it.
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149. Little bit.
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150. Any more heartless critiques
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151. of my general appearance?
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152. Nope. All done.
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153. So is she as bendy as she looks?
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154. Maya and I are just friends.
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155. No, you and I are friends
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156. and you don't have coffee
with me three times a week.
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157. She's an interesting person.
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158. She grew up in Ohio.
She has three brothers.
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159. Fascinating.
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160. Last week, that Cambodian lab tech
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161. was telling us how he
survived the Killing Fields
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162. and you left to go get a donut.
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163. So we flirt. It's fun.
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164. It's dangerous.
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165. That woman would totally do you.
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166. You think?
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167. Nothing is gonna happen.
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168. All I'm saying is if you
want to be on a diet,
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169. you might want to stop hanging
out by the dessert cart.
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170. X-ray was clean.
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171. She doesn't have herpes colitis
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172. or abdominal pain.
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173. It stopped hurting
during the X-ray,
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174. which means it was just an
intestinal blockage that passed.
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175. We should discharge her.
Absolutely.
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176. There's no need to find
any underlying cause
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177. 'cause these things
never happen twice.
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178. Take her digestive
system for a test drive.
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179. Give her a radio-opaque milkshake.
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180. X-ray every 15 minutes to see
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181. if it makes any unscheduled
stops on the way through.
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182. We'll be here all night.
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183. No, Taub will be here all night.
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184. Talk to the Unicorn
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185. and then tell me you don't believe.
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186. I did an abdominal
ct on a kid today
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187. and found a six-inch bezoar
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188. made entirely of gum.
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189. I mean, who gives a three-year-old
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190. an endless supply of g—
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191. you okay?
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192. Yeah.
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193. I mean, there was hair in it
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194. and maybe a piece of paper.
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195. So... how long you been married?
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196. One of the few drawbacks
of having an open marriage.
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197. Nobody ever asks me about
current events or the weather.
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198. Yankees look good this season.
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199. Seven years.
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200. And, uh, how long have you-
you know?
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201. After three years, we realized
that traditional marriage
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202. was making us both miserable.
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203. Most people get
divorced at that point.
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204. Yeah, we didn't want
to get divorced.
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205. We still loved each other.
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206. We just realized that
expecting one person
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207. to fulfill all of your needs
forever is unrealistic.
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208. There are happy monogamous
couples out there.
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209. Sure.
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210. One or two have the perfect marriage.
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211. Everybody else has figured out
how to settle for less.
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212. I don't want to settle and end
up resenting my husband.
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213. I'd rather g the 10%
he doesn't give me
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214. somewhere else so that i c
an really appreciate him
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215. for the 90% he does.
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216. I think something's wrong.
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217. With your stomach?
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218. My heart is racing.
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219. Try and take deep breaths.
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220. I'm going to try to
slow your heart down.
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221. Is this because of the blockage?
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222. No. It's not working.
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223. Need a crash cart in here!
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224. I need a list of all your
sexual partners
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225. from the last six months.
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226. Why?
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227. Your wife had an arrhythmia.
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228. The progression of symptoms
from bowel to heart
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229. makes a parasitic
infection most likely.
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230. Since Julia hasn't been
out of the country—
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231. the only place that
I've been recently
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232. is a business trip to Nebraska.
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233. But either of you
could have picked up
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234. a bug from one of your partners.
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235. It's kind of... complicated.
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236. How many partners are
we talking about?
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237. Ballpark.
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238. None.
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239. None?
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240. We have a great sex life.
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241. I don't need anyone else.
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242. So why not just tell her that
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243. and close this whole thing up?
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244. You married?
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245. I—I was.
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246. Did you ever agree to go see
a chick flick with your wife
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247. or pretend to enjoy
classical music?
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248. Stravinsky never groped my wife
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249. in a Midtown hotel room.
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250. She needs this.
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251. I don't.
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252. But I don't want her
to feel bad about that.
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253. He's lying.
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254. Guy's got a license to drill.
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255. Why would he lie about not using it?
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256. That's not the lie.
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257. The lie is that he gives a
crap about how his wife feels.
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258. If they're both screwing around,
that's one thing.
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259. But if she has a piece on
the side and he doesn't,
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260. the only way he'd be okay with that
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261. is if he's betraying
her in some other way
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262. that, in his mind, makes them even.
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263. My Unicorn isn't a Unicorn.
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264. It's a donkey with a
plunger stuck to its face.
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265. Right.
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266. Even the guy who's not cheating
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267. is doing it for underhanded reasons.
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268. No, no, no. He's not being cynical.
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269. He's assuming the husband
is doing something
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270. to even the score,
which means he thinks
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271. there is a score,
which means,
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272. cheating swans aside,
House believes in monogamy.
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273. He's being romantic.
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274. What I believe is that men
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275. are genetically
engineered to be jealous.
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276. Doesn't matter if i thi
nk there's a score.
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277. I guarantee you he does.
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278. Any of the wife's partners pan out?
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279. She's been with two
people other than Tom
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280. in the last six months.
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281. Neither of them have been
outside the tri-state area.
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282. So we're back to the husband.
You just said you believed—
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283. he's doing something
behind her back.
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284. What better cover than a
business trip to Nebraska?
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285. Like that's really a place.
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286. Let's find his travel records
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287. and get back to work.
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288. You seem pretty mellow
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289. about this couple's deal.
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290. Thought you'd be first in
line to shake a finger.
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291. They're still married. I'm not.
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292. Not that I could ever do it.
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293. I was jealous of House and
Cameron never touched him.
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294. Not counting the
emotional fondling.
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295. When my mom was dying,
my dad had an affair.
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296. He told you this?
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297. I'd seen them get out of his car.
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298. Two years after mom died,
they got married.
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299. That must have sucked.
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300. At the time, yeah.
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301. But looking back... It makes sense.
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302. My mom never knew about it
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303. and he needed someone to
make him feel less alone.
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304. He took care of my mom
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305. day in and day out for 2
1/2 years before she died.
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306. He was devoted to her.
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307. Loving someone else
didn't change that.
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308. So loving two people
at once is fine
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309. as long as one of them is dying?
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310. Whoever's taking care of me
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311. when I get sick, I hope they've got
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312. someone else to take care of them.
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313. Tom was telling the truth.
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314. He really did go to Nebraska.
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315. Plane ticket and restaurant seats.
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316. Forget Nebraska.
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317. Maybe they just bought their
parasites at the mall.
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318. You know, we should really
throw away that loofah.
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319. They're imported.
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320. Sometimes they're not sterilized.
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321. We think our patient got
amoebiasis from hers.
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322. Is she gonna be okay?
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323. We're treating now.
She should be fine.
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324. It's actually kind of bizarre.
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325. She and her husband
have an open marriage.
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326. They sleep with other people?
Well, she does.
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327. Her husband's totally fine with it.
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328. I mean, it's crazy, right?
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329. And you're bringing
this up because?
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330. I thought it was interesting.
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331. More interesting than
your other cases, I guess.
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332. I mean, you talk about
your colleagues,
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333. you rant about House.
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334. You don't usually
mention your patients.
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335. Is open marriage
something you want?
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336. No.
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337. I mean...
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338. I know you'd never...
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339. All this time and energy
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340. you spent convincing me
you weren't cheating...
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341. And there's somebody else.
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342. I'm not— some more
water sir?
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343. Okay.
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344. There's a woman at work.
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345. People say she's attracted to me,
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346. but nothing's happened.
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347. Nothing's going to happen.
I'm not having an affair.
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348. But you want to.
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349. No, honey.
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350. I'm trying to be honest.
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351. I don't want to make
the same mistakes.
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352. Be honest then.
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353. Are you attracted to her?
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354. Look... she's attractive.
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355. There's an attraction.
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356. Aren't there men who
make you feel that way?
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357. Of course there are,
but it never occurs to me
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358. to act on it because-
because I'm married...
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359. To you.
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360. And that's enough for me.
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361. Aren't I enough for you?
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362. Of course you are.
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363. Our patient's lost all
movement in her legs.
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364. There are other doctors, Chris.
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365. We're talking.
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366. I'm sorry.
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367. The woman's paralyzed.
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368. I'll get a cab.
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369. Tests show no spinal cord injury,
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370. no cerebral lesions, no hemorrhage.
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371. Finally got a stool sample.
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372. The loofah's innocent.
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373. No sign of amoebas
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374. or any other parasites.
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375. So paralysis, arrhythmia,
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376. and intermittent abdominal pain.
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377. And he nicked himself shaving.
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378. Sorry. That was Taub.
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379. But it was easier to solve.
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380. Means he used the crappy
razor in his locker,
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381. which means he slept here.
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382. Thanks to you.
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383. I brought up open
marriage with Rachel.
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384. It was a disaster.
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385. On the medical front,
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386. we've knocked out sex
and foreign travel.
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387. Could be an electrolyte imbalance.
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388. So the only time you're not
interested in my marriage
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389. is after you bw it up?
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390. You're the moron who
took marital advice
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391. from Tila Tequila.
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392. You pushed me into this.
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393. Figured it would either
blow up your marriage
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394. or make it more honest.
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395. Either way, you win.
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396. What about sex?
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397. I'm talking about the patient.
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398. Is that cool with everybody?
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399. We've ruled out sex.
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400. We ruled out sex with other people.
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401. Tom said he and Julia
have been doing it
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402. three or four times a week and she
's got boys on the side.
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403. Increased libido can be a symptom
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404. of adrenocortical carcinoma,
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405. which also explains
her other symptoms.
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406. A woman who likes sex must be sick?
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407. Just because everybody
in this room
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408. wishes that all women
were horny all the time
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409. doesn't make it so.
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410. Get an mri of her adrenal glands.
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411. Hi.
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412. Okay if I take the sports page?
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413. Sure.
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414. Would you mind using a coaster?
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415. Oh.
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416. Sure.
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417. Sorry.
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418. It's okay.
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419. Also, it'd be great
if you'd replace
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420. the toilet paper when
you finish a roll.
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421. And when you load the dishwasher,
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422. you can't put a big,
flat bowl on the bottom.
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423. It traps the water so nothing
on the top gets clean.
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424. And please don't throw banana
peels in the bedroom trash.
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425. I haven't done any of those things.
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426. You're probably not even aware of—
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427. I hate bananas.
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428. Oh, my God. It was House.
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429. I'm sorry.
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430. He's been trying
to get us to fight.
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431. Why would he think that
stuff would make us fight?
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432. Because of the milk.
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433. You put it in the door.
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434. The body of the refrigerator
is the coldest part.
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435. The temperature in
the door fluctuates,
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436. which decreases shelf life.
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437. Wow.
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438. When did you get all ocd?
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439. I just want clean dishes
and unspoiled milk
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440. so we can all stay healthy.
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441. Oh, it's about health.
What about the coaster?
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442. Does that replenish
my B-12 or something?
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443. Can we just drop it?
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444. Sure.
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445. You have this list of annoyances
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446. the entire time we were married?
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447. Get better, mommy.
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448. I love you, rabbit.
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449. Julia, you have a guest.
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450. Hi.
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451. This isn't a good time.
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452. Dr. Hadley, did you say
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453. there was a video
game in the playroom?
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454. Maybe you can teach me
how to play one of them.
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455. See you in radiology.
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456. Get out of my wife's room.
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457. Your relationship with her sta
ys out of our space.
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458. I was worried about her.
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459. Tom's right. You should go.
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460. So it's fine if we have sex,
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461. but if I drop by to
see if you're okay—
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462. this is our family.
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463. Sorry.
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464. I spent two years of residency
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465. wearing shirts that
were a size too small.
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466. How hard is it to ask me not
to put them in the dryer?
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467. And I only did your laundry
because you were never home.
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468. I didn't ask you to.
Of course you didn't.
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469. You just got annoyed whenever
you didn't have clean underwear.
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470. I never said I was annoyed.
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471. That's the point.
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472. You didn't say anything.
Copy !req
473. So I'm getting a lecture
on communication
Copy !req
474. from someone who had
her lawyer inform me
Copy !req
475. our marriage was over.
Copy !req
476. Asking for an open marriage.
Copy !req
477. You got stones.
Copy !req
478. Conversation sort
of got away from me.
Copy !req
479. It was a train wreck.
Copy !req
480. I think it's good
you brought it up.
Copy !req
481. I read a study that found
men who have multiple copies
Copy !req
482. of a certain vasopressin receptor
Copy !req
483. are twice as likely
to be unfaithful.
Copy !req
484. Maybe you're just
one of those guys.
Copy !req
485. So my cheating is
biologically predetermined?
Copy !req
486. Fantastic.
Copy !req
487. Multiply times five.
Copy !req
488. We need a better
look at the medulla.
Copy !req
489. I thought you'd be relieved.
Copy !req
490. This gets you off the hook.
Copy !req
491. It's just genetics.
Copy !req
492. I'm 5'6" and have a
receding hairline.
Copy !req
493. I hate genetics.
Copy !req
494. Medulla's clean.
Copy !req
495. I don't see you wearing
lifts or hair plugs.
Copy !req
496. That's because being short and bald
Copy !req
497. doesn't hurt anybody.
Copy !req
498. The only thing hurtful
about your other
Copy !req
499. genetic predisposition is
that you keep denying it.
Copy !req
500. It's not good for you or Rachel.
Copy !req
501. There's nothing there.
It's not adrenal cancer.
Copy !req
502. And maybe you're right about me.
Copy !req
503. But I'm not gonna stop trying.
Copy !req
504. Rachel's worth it.
Copy !req
505. Look up there.
Copy !req
506. The lung.
Copy !req
507. What is that?
Copy !req
508. You served me with divorce papers
Copy !req
509. in the middle of a medical
conference in New Orleans.
Copy !req
510. I threw a bottle into
an antique mirror.
Copy !req
511. Oh, you exhibited an emotion?
Copy !req
512. I wish I'd known you were capable.
Copy !req
513. I loved you.
Copy !req
514. I thought I was gonna
be following you
Copy !req
515. to Baltimore, remember?
Copy !req
516. I called about apartments.
I set up interviews.
Copy !req
517. How could you think that we
still had a real marriage?
Copy !req
518. We hadn't had a
conversation in months.
Copy !req
519. Maybe because I was working
two jobs to support us.
Copy !req
520. No! No!
Copy !req
521. It's because when you were home,
Copy !req
522. it was like talking
to a block of ice.
Copy !req
523. You were obviously
so pissed off at me.
Copy !req
524. I was killing myself
so that you could take
Copy !req
525. that non-paying internship.
Copy !req
526. That you said that I should take.
Copy !req
527. I was trying to be supportive!
Copy !req
528. Why do I have to be the bad guy?
Copy !req
529. Expressing yourself does
not make you the bad guy.
Copy !req
530. Okay, then. You were
being a selfish bitch.
Copy !req
531. VQ scan confirmed the spot
on Julia's lung was a clot.
Copy !req
532. Think there's a chance
the husband's a plushie?
Copy !req
533. If he has a secret,
Copy !req
534. I highly doubt it's more
relevant than the clot.
Copy !req
535. Clotting disorder would
explain everything.
Copy !req
536. Question is, which one?
Copy !req
537. Do you read any of your
departmental memos?
Copy !req
538. Only the ones labeled, "n-s-f-w."
Copy !req
539. Accounting notified
you two days ago
Copy !req
540. about your patient's insurance.
Copy !req
541. Sorry, that's "n-n-s-f-w."
Copy !req
542. Here. He doesn't have any.
Copy !req
543. Try not to bankrupt them.
Copy !req
544. Oh, I'm long past the
number of procedures
Copy !req
545. that'll bankrupt them.
Copy !req
546. Julia's got insurance.
Copy !req
547. I saw the policy
number on the form.
Copy !req
548. But the policy lapsed
due to non-payment.
Copy !req
549. I already made three
calls about this.
Copy !req
550. You should have been aware of that.
Copy !req
551. No, there's just a mistake.
Copy !req
552. Of course we have health insurance.
Copy !req
553. We're actually a little
behind on the premiums.
Copy !req
554. But I pulled money
Copy !req
555. out of my retirementccount to cover it.
Copy !req
556. They said that we'll be fine in—
Copy !req
557. Why the retirement account?
Copy !req
558. We'll just give you
a few minutes to—
Copy !req
559. and by "we," she means "she."
Copy !req
560. I lost all of our savings.
Copy !req
561. Sounds like a secret to me.
Copy !req
562. I started her on heparin to prevent
Copy !req
563. further clots, but we still
don't know what's going on.
Copy !req
564. Of course the husband's
secret was money.
Copy !req
565. If it's not sex, it's always money.
Copy !req
566. Unless it's sex for money.
Copy !req
567. How did he lose it anyway?
Copy !req
568. It's not medically relevant.
You're not gonna care.
Copy !req
569. Wilson's been teaching
me how to care. Try me.
Copy !req
570. He builds wind turbines
Copy !req
571. and leases them out to
local power companies.
Copy !req
572. You're right. I don't care.
Copy !req
573. Clotting disorder: Dic.
Copy !req
574. Factor five leiden,
antiphospholipid syndrome.
Copy !req
575. Vitamin k deficiency also fits.
Copy !req
576. Causes thrombophilia and is
consistent with abdominal pain.
Copy !req
577. Congratulations, House.
Sam ended it.
Copy !req
578. What happened?
Copy !req
579. Go test our patient's blood.
Copy !req
580. But it can wait five minutes.
Copy !req
581. For everything we discussed.
Copy !req
582. I'm sorry.
Copy !req
583. Well, at least you're
actually taking responsibility
Copy !req
584. for once in your life.
Copy !req
585. Sorry that she left.
It's not my fault.
Copy !req
586. I didn't even want
Copy !req
587. to get involved.
Copy !req
588. You dragged it out of me.
Copy !req
589. What about the
dishwasher and the banana
Copy !req
590. and the toi—
Copy !req
591. she left because of the banana.
Copy !req
592. I just wanted you to
stand up for yourself.
Copy !req
593. Tell her what you want.
Copy !req
594. If doing that causes
her to walk out
Copy !req
595. for the second time,
well, your relationship
Copy !req
596. wasn't gonna last anyway.
Copy !req
597. Or you could have stayed out of it.
Copy !req
598. I could have kept my mouth shut,
Copy !req
599. been annoyed sometimes,
but I'd be happy,
Copy !req
600. because I'd still be with her.
Copy !req
601. Now all I have is cold milk.
Copy !req
602. As long as you're free,
Copy !req
603. you want to grab some dinner?
Copy !req
604. Did Tom go home for the night?
Copy !req
605. For starters.
Copy !req
606. I told him to leave.
I don't want him here.
Copy !req
607. Money is a complicated subject.
Copy !req
608. Yeah, it's not the money.
Copy !req
609. I mean, the-
the money's bad, but...
Copy !req
610. When we first opened our marriage,
Copy !req
611. I got involved with a guy
who lied about being single.
Copy !req
612. Then one day, his wife calls me.
Copy !req
613. She's crying and screaming
and totally out of control.
Copy !req
614. And I felt...
Copy !req
615. superior.
Copy !req
616. I thought I don't ever have to
worry about feeling this way
Copy !req
617. because Tom and I are
honest with each other.
Copy !req
618. Well, here I am.
Copy !req
619. Hi.
Copy !req
620. Sorry I didn't make
it home last night.
Copy !req
621. I needed to run some tests.
Copy !req
622. You know what the worst part was?
Copy !req
623. When y had your affair...
Copy !req
624. Wasn't the sex.
Copy !req
625. It was the lies.
Copy !req
626. Realizing that the
narrative of my life
Copy !req
627. was totally wrong.
Copy !req
628. You weren't stuck in surgery.
Copy !req
629. You weren't out of town.
Copy !req
630. I don't want to go
through that again.
Copy !req
631. I told you nothing's—
Copy !req
632. Thursday nights.
Copy !req
633. You have to be home by midnight.
Copy !req
634. You don't bring her here.
Copy !req
635. You don't talk to h
er about me
Copy !req
636. and I don't want to meet
her ever in any context.
Copy !req
637. Are you giving me permission
to sleep with other women?
Copy !req
638. It's what you want, isn't it?
Copy !req
639. I want you.
Copy !req
640. You want more than me.
Copy !req
641. You want that thrill.
Copy !req
642. But I love you.
Copy !req
643. And I really believe
that you love me...
Copy !req
644. And we have a good life together.
Copy !req
645. And at this point,
Copy !req
646. either I walk away
or I try to accept
Copy !req
647. who you really are.
Copy !req
648. Tomorrow's Thursday.
Copy !req
649. Yes, it is.
Copy !req
650. All our tests came back negative.
Copy !req
651. It's not a clotting disorder.
Copy !req
652. Which means we need to
come up with a better idea.
Copy !req
653. So what causes problems in
the stomach, heart, nerves?
Copy !req
654. Oh, my God.
Copy !req
655. You know what it is?
Copy !req
656. Taub's wife gave the green
light for an open marriage.
Copy !req
657. He's wearing cologne,
Copy !req
658. but not the stink of shame.
Copy !req
659. You got a date.
Copy !req
660. I am going out with Maya tonight
Copy !req
661. with Rachel's blessing.
Copy !req
662. Mazel Tov?
Copy !req
663. Maybe the problem isn't her blood.
Copy !req
664. Maybe it's the vessels
carrying the blood.
Copy !req
665. No sign of schistocytes
or hemolysis.
Copy !req
666. So you're actually going
to sleep with another woman
Copy !req
667. then go home to your wife?
Copy !req
668. Thank God someone's
Copy !req
669. keeping us focused on
what's really important.
Copy !req
670. Taub was gonna do
all of that anyway.
Copy !req
671. Pulmonary arterial hypertension.
Copy !req
672. Imaging showed normal diameter
in her pulmonary artery.
Copy !req
673. Here's a thought—
Copy !req
674. Taub's wife is now
totally on the market.
Copy !req
675. Mind hitting me with her digits?
Copy !req
676. She would love that,
but duty calls.
Copy !req
677. What's the matter?
Copy !req
678. My stomach.
Copy !req
679. Same pain as before?
Copy !req
680. Yeah, but worse.
Copy !req
681. Get the portable
ultrasound in here.
Copy !req
682. We need to get a look at her belly.
Copy !req
683. Help me!
Copy !req
684. Pain, pain went away,
Copy !req
685. came back another day.
Copy !req
686. Question is, what brought it back?
Copy !req
687. Physical exam was unrevealing.
Ultrasound was clean.
Copy !req
688. So afterwards, are you gonna shower
Copy !req
689. at your girlfriend's or at home?
Copy !req
690. Patient. Abdominal pain.
Copy !req
691. Yeah, he's right.
Copy !req
692. Let's get this wrapped
up before 6:00.
Copy !req
693. Taub turns back into a
faithful Pumpkin at midnight.
Copy !req
694. Patient was out with her
boy toy before she came in.
Copy !req
695. Maybe the pain was triggered
by sexual excitement.
Copy !req
696. Because lying alone
in a hospital bed
Copy !req
697. contemplating bankruptcy— hot.
Copy !req
698. My point was that
arousal is a function
Copy !req
699. of the parasympathetic
nervous system.
Copy !req
700. If that's where the problem is,
Copy !req
701. the pain could be triggered by crying,
which seems—
Copy !req
702. pns. Also controls digestion,
Copy !req
703. which she's been doing without
screaming her head off
Copy !req
704. since she's been here.
Copy !req
705. What if what matters isn't
when the pain started,
Copy !req
706. but when it stopped?
It was during an X-ray.
Copy !req
707. You think that cured her?
Copy !req
708. No, but House prepped her for
the X-ray with a barium enema.
Copy !req
709. Well, that wouldn't
treat anything except—
Copy !req
710. go.
Copy !req
711. You're in pain because
part of your intestine
Copy !req
712. folded in on itself.
Copy !req
713. It's called an intussusception.
Copy !req
714. It's cutting off blood flow.
Copy !req
715. We need to fix it before your
bowel gets necrotic and dies.
Copy !req
716. Once you do that,
will I get better?
Copy !req
717. When this happens in adults,
Copy !req
718. it's usually a sign
of abdominal cancer.
Copy !req
719. We'll fix the overlap,
Copy !req
720. and then search your
intestine for tumors.
Copy !req
721. Foam?
Copy !req
722. I have a bad feeling about this.
Copy !req
723. A friend can't spontaneously buy
Copy !req
724. an overpriced itali
an espresso machine
Copy !req
725. for another friend?
Copy !req
726. What did you do?
Copy !req
727. Nothing. That's the beauty.
Copy !req
728. I genuinely tried to help Wilson.
Copy !req
729. I told him to stand up for himself,
Copy !req
730. which you know is
legitimate advice.
Copy !req
731. And his relationship blew up.
Copy !req
732. Is he okay?
Copy !req
733. Ah, he'll be fine.
Copy !req
734. Point is, I realized something.
Copy !req
735. I do nice things,
nice things happen to me.
Copy !req
736. Karma works.
Copy !req
737. So you're paying it forward?
Copy !req
738. If this should somehow
lead to Lucas dying
Copy !req
739. or oral sex,
Copy !req
740. so be it.
Copy !req
741. Namaste.
Copy !req
742. Think I should wear a tie tonight?
Copy !req
743. This isn't weird at all.
Copy !req
744. I mean, where's
Rachel eating tonight?
Copy !req
745. Home.
Copy !req
746. What if she's going out too?
Copy !req
747. She is allowed to, right?
Copy !req
748. Of course. It's only fair.
Copy !req
749. But I don't think she will.
Copy !req
750. Your wife only eats dinner at home?
Copy !req
751. If she did go out,
Copy !req
752. that would be tough,
Copy !req
753. but I think i can handle it.
Copy !req
754. Don't do it unless you're sure.
Copy !req
755. I know I'd rather be
jealous than a liar.
Copy !req
756. Got something here.
Copy !req
757. Kelly clamp and scalpel.
Copy !req
758. Biopsy showed
non-specific inflammation,
Copy !req
759. which suggests ibd,
Copy !req
760. only it doesn't explain
the cardiac problems.
Copy !req
761. Or her declining kidney function.
Copy !req
762. We ran panels during surgery.
Copy !req
763. Actually, ibd does make sense,
Copy !req
764. 'cause it could trigger
ankylosing spondylitis,
Copy !req
765. which would explain the
heart and the kidneys.
Copy !req
766. Start her on sulfasalazine
and tnf-inhibitors.
Copy !req
767. Oh, and Taub,
Copy !req
768. I'm not gonna see you before
you head off for gomorrah.
Copy !req
769. Just remember,
if you get disoriented...
Copy !req
770. Breathe through your nose
and look for the horizon.
Copy !req
771. I can't.
Copy !req
772. I really thought I could do this.
Copy !req
773. Logically, it makes perfect sense.
Copy !req
774. But...
Copy !req
775. all afternoon,
Copy !req
776. all I kept thinking about
was the two of you,
Copy !req
777. together,
Copy !req
778. and you touching her.
Copy !req
779. Nothing's happened.
Copy !req
780. It's okay.
Copy !req
781. I'm sorry.
Copy !req
782. 'Cause I really wanted it—
Copy !req
783. no.
Copy !req
784. I've been an idiot,
Copy !req
785. and I don't need anything else.
Copy !req
786. I just need you.
Copy !req
787. You mean that?
Copy !req
788. I do.
Copy !req
789. I love you, Rachel.
Copy !req
790. I love you too.
Copy !req
791. Let's go home.
Copy !req
792. Is that okay?
Copy !req
793. There are other doctors.
Copy !req
794. The treatment's not working.
Copy !req
795. Her left kidney failed last night.
Copy !req
796. The other one's right behind it.
Copy !req
797. It's not ankylosing spondylitis.
Copy !req
798. Kidney biopsy showed she
had iga nephropathy,
Copy !req
799. which could be caused by
Copy !req
800. or associated with any
of these conditions.
Copy !req
801. We've gone from too
few ideas to too many,
Copy !req
802. and our patient's
running out of time.
Copy !req
803. Why the lack of afterglow?
Copy !req
804. Physio girl not as
freaky as you'd hoped?
Copy !req
805. I went home with my wife.
Copy !req
806. After all that,
Copy !req
807. you chickened out.
Copy !req
808. I can't hurt Rachel like that.
Copy !req
809. Sickle cell anemia would
have shown on blood tests.
Copy !req
810. No flattened intestinal villi
rules out celiac.
Copy !req
811. Seriously?
Copy !req
812. Our patient's dying,
Copy !req
813. and we can't move past my sex life?
Copy !req
814. Seriously,
you'd think it'd kill her
Copy !req
815. if we spend 15 seconds mocking you?
Copy !req
816. Time's up.
Copy !req
817. Normal liver enzymes
Copy !req
818. rules out hep b and cirrhosis.
Copy !req
819. Alport and anti-gbm antibody
Copy !req
820. are both untreatable,
Copy !req
821. so if she has them
we can't help her.
Copy !req
822. And it can't be
henoch-schonlein purpura.
Copy !req
823. No inciting respiratory infection
Copy !req
824. and no rash.
Copy !req
825. I don't care what it's not.
Copy !req
826. I want to know what it could be.
Copy !req
827. Well, everything left on the list.
Copy !req
828. The list was not created equal.
Copy !req
829. Neither was man, by the way.
Copy !req
830. Hemochromatosis is a possibility.
Copy !req
831. Excess iron builds up,
Copy !req
832. causes problems throughout the body.
Copy !req
833. Weil's syndrome also affects
multiple organ systems,
Copy !req
834. and it wouldn't have been
treated
Copy !req
835. by the antibiotic the E.
R. gave her.
Copy !req
836. Sarcoidosis makes sense too.
Copy !req
837. Good.
Copy !req
838. Treat for those three.
Copy !req
839. I think you should call Tom.
Copy !req
840. Am I gonna die?
Copy !req
841. I don't know.
Copy !req
842. If he walked in here right now,
Copy !req
843. I'd look in his face and all
I would think is "liar."
Copy !req
844. Don't you think
that's kind of unfair?
Copy !req
845. You say honesty's all-important,
Copy !req
846. but you conveniently igno
re the truth
Copy !req
847. that some truths hurt people.
Copy !req
848. Tom lied to protect you.
Copy !req
849. He was covering his ass.
Copy !req
850. I'm not talking about the money.
Copy !req
851. Tom hasn't slept with anyone else
Copy !req
852. in over a year.
Copy !req
853. He told you that?
Copy !req
854. So my entire marriage is a sham?
Copy !req
855. No.
Copy !req
856. Your husband, who only wants you,
Copy !req
857. lied so that you could be happy.
Copy !req
858. That seems pretty real to me.
Copy !req
859. Yeah?
Copy !req
860. Hey.
Copy !req
861. Hey.
Copy !req
862. Listen, I'm sorry.
Copy !req
863. Me too. I shouldn't have said—
Copy !req
864. no, you were right.
Copy !req
865. I was selfish back then.
Copy !req
866. I'm trying to change.
Copy !req
867. And I don't know if
it's House or what,
Copy !req
868. but... you're different too.
Copy !req
869. I'm trying.
Copy !req
870. I always thought that I
was keeping the peace,
Copy !req
871. but I was just resenting you
Copy !req
872. and giving you a reason to leave.
Copy !req
873. I wish we had this
fight ten years ago.
Copy !req
874. Is it okay if we don't
give House the credit?
Copy !req
875. Oh, I recommend it.
Copy !req
876. "O" for three.
Copy !req
877. Her kidney function
is still declining.
Copy !req
878. We're gonna need to start dialysis.
Copy !req
879. Glad the husband's back.
Copy !req
880. After missing so
many little deaths,
Copy !req
881. he should be here for the big one.
Copy !req
882. Top six, anyone?
Copy !req
883. Polyarteritis nodosa?
Copy !req
884. We'd have seen some
improvement on prednisone.
Copy !req
885. Guy's wife's dying,
Copy !req
886. and he stops to buy flowers.
Copy !req
887. They're from his garden.
Copy !req
888. Mercury poisoning fits.
Copy !req
889. Those are lilacs.
Copy !req
890. My mom used to grow lilacs.
Copy !req
891. My dad made her get rid of them,
Copy !req
892. 'cause there were too many bees.
Copy !req
893. We ruled out hsp
Copy !req
894. 'cause there was no inciting
respiratory infection.
Copy !req
895. But in rare cases, it can also
be triggered by a bee sting.
Copy !req
896. We also ruled it out
because there's no rash.
Copy !req
897. Maybe we just didn't see it.
Copy !req
898. Have you been stung
by a bee recently?
Copy !req
899. Uh, about a month ago.
Copy !req
900. What's going on?
Copy !req
901. I think your wife has
henoch-schonlein purpura.
Copy !req
902. Systemic vasculitis
can cause
Copy !req
903. lesions and inflammations
throughout the body.
Copy !req
904. It's pretty awful,
Copy !req
905. which explains why it was
named after a German.
Copy !req
906. Actually two germans.
Copy !req
907. Lesions can pop up in the heart,
Copy !req
908. sometimes in the kidneys,
but always on the skin.
Copy !req
909. Means you'd have a rash somewhere.
Copy !req
910. I don't.
Copy !req
911. Not that you know of.
Copy !req
912. Okay, I'm gonna have
to check your holes.
Copy !req
913. I'll start with the mouth.
If there's nothing there,
Copy !req
914. then things might
have to get kinky.
Copy !req
915. Say aah.
Copy !req
916. Aah.
Copy !req
917. I was kinda hoping for kinky.
Copy !req
918. Is that good or bad?
Copy !req
919. We'll treat her
Copy !req
920. with high-dose ivig
and cyclophosphamide.
Copy !req
921. You should be fine.
Copy !req
922. I'm gonna be okay.
Copy !req
923. I love you.
Copy !req
924. That is adorable.
Copy !req
925. Other than you still wanting
to have sex with other dudes,
Copy !req
926. and him bankrupting your family,
Copy !req
927. I think you kids are
pretty much home free.
Copy !req
928. Mm-hmm?
Copy !req
929. And...
Copy !req
930. You two made up?
Copy !req
931. No.
Copy !req
932. You can thank me later.
Copy !req
933. I'm all-in.
Copy !req
934. All right.
Copy !req
935. Fold.
Copy !req
936. you need a hand?
Copy !req
937. thanks.
Copy !req
938. sorry about canceling
the other night.
Copy !req
939. Me too.
Copy !req
940. you wanna go somewhere?
Copy !req