1. And now, coming to the line,Copy !req
2. last year's
Rookie of the Year, Casey Alfonso!Copy !req
3. In lane two, nine-time
national champion, Tony Kumer.Copy !req
4. Tony's got his light on in lane two,
and now Casey is approaching the line.Copy !req
5. - How do you feel?
- Great.Copy !req
6. I feel like throwing up my guts.Copy !req
7. You always feel like throwing up.Copy !req
8. Come on, Dad. Let's get
this digger on the line.Copy !req
9. You sure you don't wanna
go to law school?Copy !req
10. - I hate lawyers!
- Yeah, so do I.Copy !req
11. Go get 'em, baby!Copy !req
12. Okay, looks like we're ready to go!Copy !req
13. Let's hear it, folks!Copy !req
14. And it's Casey 'Alfonso,
by less than half a car length!Copy !req
15. What a spectacular finish
for the young female.Copy !req
16. Casey Alfonso, with an amazing finish.Copy !req
17. What'd you do at the end there?Copy !req
18. Yeah, yeah.Copy !req
19. At about 250 feet,
the car got out of shape a bit,Copy !req
20. but about halfway down,
I just got into the zone or something.Copy !req
21. I pedaled it back into the groove.
It was the coolest ride of my life.Copy !req
22. How does it feel
to be nine-time national champion...Copy !req
23. I'm sorry. Can you repeat that?Copy !req
24. Casey? Casey! Casey!
Out of the way. Out of the way!Copy !req
25. Casey! Get me an ambulance.
Ron, get the ambulance! Casey?Copy !req
26. Sixty-eight year old male, non-smoker.Copy !req
27. Sixty-eight's a good run.Copy !req
28. That'll leave something in the lock box
for the rest of us. Next?Copy !req
29. That's your breakfast?Copy !req
30. Technically, it's Wilson's lunch.Copy !req
31. Twenty-month old baby,
persistent rash, fever...Copy !req
32. Too much crying.Copy !req
33. - Female college student with...
- Too much drama.Copy !req
34. You don't care about
the crying or the drama,Copy !req
35. 'cause you won't see the patient.Copy !req
36. And you'd treat Methuselah if his snot
had an interesting color.Copy !req
37. Means you've already decided which case
you wanna take next.Copy !req
38. Tell me about speed racer.Copy !req
39. Female, seizure with visual and auditory
processing deficiency.Copy !req
40. I did a consult, and...Copy !req
41. What kind of race car?Copy !req
42. Dragster.Copy !req
43. Continue.Copy !req
44. You're gonna take a case
based on the car she drives?Copy !req
45. Nothing says, "Thanks for saving my life"Copy !req
46. like a test drive in a car that
accelerates faster than a space shuttle.Copy !req
47. You can't save her life,
'cause she's not dying.Copy !req
48. Her labs show signs of dehydration,Copy !req
49. means the problem's
just likely heatstroke.Copy !req
50. Kind of hard to get
heat struck in four and a half seconds.Copy !req
51. Not when you're wearing
a three-layer fireproof suit.Copy !req
52. Excuse me, Dr. House?Copy !req
53. No. Lazy ass called in sick again.Copy !req
54. We can give him the message.Copy !req
55. May we talk in private?Copy !req
56. So, either it's heatstroke,
in which case we take the afternoon off,Copy !req
57. or it's one of the diagnoses
that you guys are gonna have for meCopy !req
58. in two minutes.Copy !req
59. You're in charge.Copy !req
60. I know.Copy !req
61. - Cop?
- He's not packing.Copy !req
62. Your dad's either a cop
or a security guard.Copy !req
63. Or she carries a weapon.Copy !req
64. You're with the CIA.Copy !req
65. One of our employees
just returned from an assignment sick.Copy !req
66. Now, we believe he may be the victim
of an assassination attempt.Copy !req
67. Sure.Copy !req
68. You wanna close the door?Copy !req
69. Door?Copy !req
70. Well, I assume you're gonna drop trou at
some point during the dance,Copy !req
71. I don't see why I should share.Copy !req
72. This isn't a joke.Copy !req
73. If you're willing to help us,
we need to leave now.Copy !req
74. If I have to walk somewhere, there
better be at least five girls involved.Copy !req
75. And they better be working
their way through college.Copy !req
76. Okay, what have you got?Copy !req
77. Hereditary brain disorder,
transient ischemiaCopy !req
78. or paraneoplastic syndrome.Copy !req
79. None of those go away with IV fluids.
It's heatstroke.Copy !req
80. Or Cushing's or calcium deficiency.Copy !req
81. Who's your friend?Copy !req
82. We use the term life partner.Copy !req
83. Get a fresh history, neurological exam
and an MRI of her head.Copy !req
84. Fifteen minutes for the lap dance,Copy !req
85. a half-hour to
scrub the guilt off my soul...Copy !req
86. See you in 45!Copy !req
87. Dr. House, we need to hurry.Copy !req
88. Yeah, we need to hurry.Copy !req
89. Little advice.Copy !req
90. I mean, obviously the Village People
played out the whole cop thing.Copy !req
91. But come on, CIA?Copy !req
92. You seriously expect
anyone to believe that?Copy !req
93. It helps when you have props.Copy !req
94. Keep your eye on my pen.Copy !req
95. Very good.Copy !req
96. Any nausea or vomiting
before the seizure?Copy !req
97. No.Copy !req
98. My dad had some, but he's always like
that before a race.Copy !req
99. Could have been food poisoning.Copy !req
100. - You two eat breakfast together?
- No.Copy !req
101. Any history of sciatica or spinal injury?Copy !req
102. No.Copy !req
103. Abnormal deep tendon reflex.Copy !req
104. Really? Let me see.Copy !req
105. - It's there.
- I didn't say it wasn't there,Copy !req
106. I said it was abnormal.Copy !req
107. We're gonna give you an MRI to be sure,Copy !req
108. but I'm guessing your symptoms were
caused by just dehydration in the heat.Copy !req
109. You're guessing?Copy !req
110. Look, I make a living
driving 300 miles an hour,Copy !req
111. which makes the ability
to stay conscious kind of important.Copy !req
112. I'm sure it's just heatstroke,Copy !req
113. but we're gonna do an MRI
to be extra careful.Copy !req
114. You said you left your cell in your office.Copy !req
115. I lied.Copy !req
116. I wasn't going to take it.Copy !req
117. Just tell you to turn it off for take-off.Copy !req
118. I know.Copy !req
119. I just wanted to see if you could tell
that I was lying.Copy !req
120. Useful information. Yeah?Copy !req
121. Where are you?Copy !req
122. I'm on a top-secret mission for the CIA.Copy !req
123. Right.Copy !req
124. There was nothing
on your race car driver's CTCopy !req
125. and the history
and physical were normal.Copy !req
126. Her deep tendon reflexes
seemed a bit weak to me.Copy !req
127. Areflexia could mean Miller Fisher.Copy !req
128. Yes, areflexia could mean Miller Fisher,Copy !req
129. but since the reflex was weak, not
absent, it doesn't mean anything.Copy !req
130. I'm releasing her.
You can go back to your poker game.Copy !req
131. Poker's illegal.Copy !req
132. The CIA would never allow illegal activity.Copy !req
133. Have you considered Miller Fisher?Copy !req
134. Why? What happened?Copy !req
135. She just had another seizure. And now
she's getting a vertical nystagmus.Copy !req
136. We think it's Miller Fisher,
an inflammatory process.Copy !req
137. In rare cases, it can cause
respiratory failure, but...Copy !req
138. Wait, wait. She could stop breathing?Copy !req
139. You said there was nothing wrong.
You said you were sure.Copy !req
140. You just had another seizure.
Clearly there's something wrong.Copy !req
141. So, why should I trust you
to figure out what it is?Copy !req
142. Where's Dr. House? I'm at this hospital...Copy !req
143. It's gonna be all right.Copy !req
144. We just need to start
the plasmapheresis.Copy !req
145. No.Copy !req
146. It's not going to be all right,Copy !req
147. because you obviously
don't have a clue what you're doing.Copy !req
148. I'm not letting you touch me.Copy !req
149. Honey!Copy !req
150. I wanna see House. Where is he?Copy !req
151. It looks a lot better on 24.Copy !req
152. I take that back.Copy !req
153. Dr. Samira Terzi.
It's a pleasure to meet you, Dr. House.Copy !req
154. We really appreciate
the consult on such short notice.Copy !req
155. There's nothing that gives me more
pleasure than helping out a colleague.Copy !req
156. This is Dr. Sidney Curtis
from the Mayo Clinic.Copy !req
157. He's also agreed to
help with the diagnosis.Copy !req
158. Dr. House.Copy !req
159. Curtis on Immunology, Sidney Curtis?Copy !req
160. You've read it?Copy !req
161. Nope, but it is keeping my piano level.Copy !req
162. So, where is the poor sick fella?Copy !req
163. What do we do?Copy !req
164. I don't know yet.Copy !req
165. She needs treatment.Copy !req
166. This is a test, right?Copy !req
167. You're reporting
back to him everything we do.Copy !req
168. Yeah. And I asked the patient
to be uncooperative.Copy !req
169. Personally, I think she overplayed it.Copy !req
170. She's being uncooperative because you
made us all look like idiots.Copy !req
171. We're only gonna look like idiotsCopy !req
172. if we can't figure out how to get her
to agree to the treatment.Copy !req
173. What would House do right now?Copy !req
174. Pop a pill, insult us and trick the patient.Copy !req
175. We can do that last part.Copy !req
176. She's never met House before, has she?Copy !req
177. Who's got a cane?Copy !req
178. House isn't here.Copy !req
179. We're not gonna act like him.Copy !req
180. What do you want?Copy !req
181. I'm gonna do what doctors
aren't supposed to do,Copy !req
182. admit I made a mistake.Copy !req
183. I shouldn't have been
so quick to dismiss your symptoms.Copy !req
184. But you need to let us
start the plasmapheresis.Copy !req
185. What do you want?Copy !req
186. Case? Honey, do you
know where you are?Copy !req
187. - She's burning up.
- Start the treatment.Copy !req
188. - I can't.
- You've got my permission.Copy !req
189. - She's obviously confused.
- Doesn't matter anymore.Copy !req
190. Miller Fisher doesn't
cause delirium and fever.Copy !req
191. I don't know what this is.Copy !req
192. I'm afraid there are gonna be some
limitations on his medical history.Copy !req
193. Just let me know what you need and I
should be able to provide it.Copy !req
194. FYI, my malpractice insurance
doesn't cover alien autopsies.Copy !req
195. That's fine.Copy !req
196. X-files are the next wing over.Copy !req
197. Where was the patient
when he first fell ill?Copy !req
198. Sorry, that's classified.Copy !req
199. But assume there aren't too many places
in the world John hasn't been.Copy !req
200. And, yes, John's a cover name.Copy !req
201. And what makes you
think it was an attempt on his life?Copy !req
202. Sorry, can't tell you that, either.Copy !req
203. - Well, what can you tell us?
- Yeah.Copy !req
204. Did Oswald really have sex
with Marilyn Monroe?Copy !req
205. Good Lord.Copy !req
206. Very professional.Copy !req
207. Five days ago
he was 185 pounds. Perfect health.Copy !req
208. Cool.Copy !req
209. Fever and delirium rule out...Copy !req
210. He's not gonna hire you just because
you called him the most,Copy !req
211. especially since it's obvious
he doesn't want to be called.Copy !req
212. Symptoms rule out Miller Fisher.
MS fits better.Copy !req
213. Progression's too fast.
More likely meningitis.Copy !req
214. Areflexia doesn't fit as well with...Copy !req
215. Does with amyloidosis.Copy !req
216. That's even slower than MS. It's lupus.Copy !req
217. I'm with the little man on this one.Copy !req
218. It's attacking the body
and the brain, classic autoimmune.Copy !req
219. Flirt all you want, but I should warn
you, shiksas are for practice.Copy !req
220. Lupus this aggressive
wouldn't spare her kidneys.Copy !req
221. It's primarily neurological.
Let's start her on...Copy !req
222. Then why no plaques on her MRI?Copy !req
223. MRI was inconclusive. Start her on...Copy !req
224. So, now you're sure that it's MS.Copy !req
225. Just like you were sure
it was Miller Fisher.Copy !req
226. An hour after you were sure
it was heatstroke.Copy !req
227. The symptoms fit.
Start her on interferon.Copy !req
228. We're not gonna
score any points with HouseCopy !req
229. if we solve this
just by running your errands.Copy !req
230. - I get that you wanna be right.
- You don't?Copy !req
231. I'm just trying to save the patient,
not score points with my boss.Copy !req
232. Would it hurt the patient
if you let us run some tests?Copy !req
233. You've got three hours.Copy !req
234. We've run six complete tox screens,Copy !req
235. tested for every heavy metal, poison and
biological agent we can think of.Copy !req
236. It says here he ate a lot of chestnuts.Copy !req
237. Hold on a second.Copy !req
238. If the squirrel liberation army
is involved, I'm out of here.Copy !req
239. Those little rodents are...Copy !req
240. Horse chestnuts are poisonous.
If someone switched them...Copy !req
241. Horse chestnuts may look like chestnuts,Copy !req
242. but they taste like
a horse's lower than chestnuts,Copy !req
243. which makes the theory that he
accidentally ate a couple of hundredCopy !req
244. slightly less persuasive.Copy !req
245. Seeing as how he was prowling
the back alleys of Tehran...Copy !req
246. It wasn't Tehran, it was...Copy !req
247. You almost got me.Copy !req
248. Unless we know the local
environmental factors,Copy !req
249. the poisonous flora...Copy !req
250. You know I can't tell you that.Copy !req
251. Well, then why are we here? You might
as well just Google "poison."Copy !req
252. All they would tell me is he spent
the last eleven months in Bolivia.Copy !req
253. Who you gonna kill
in Bolivia? My old housekeeper?Copy !req
254. We don't kill people.Copy !req
255. I'm sorry, who are you
gonna marginalize?Copy !req
256. If it is my housekeeper,
she has it coming.Copy !req
257. Cleaning the windows
means cleaning both sides.Copy !req
258. Am I right or am I right?Copy !req
259. What does it matter what he was doing?Copy !req
260. - The guy's dying.
- Not anymore.Copy !req
261. I know what's poisoning him, and who.Copy !req
262. John.Copy !req
263. It's just pancreatitis.Copy !req
264. He's not an alcoholic.Copy !req
265. And unless his pancreas
is in his fingers...Copy !req
266. Spies can't get fungal infections?Copy !req
267. And the burns on his skin?Copy !req
268. Spies can't get sunburns?Copy !req
269. Bolivia doesn't have sun?Copy !req
270. So, either we go with his theory
of the non-drinking drunk,Copy !req
271. or he was poisoned by some groupCopy !req
272. with the resources
to make it completely untraceable,Copy !req
273. some customized isotope.Copy !req
274. Let's treat for radiation poisoning.Copy !req
275. The iodine's to protect your thyroid.
Antibiotics are to handle infections.Copy !req
276. Should start working
in a couple of hours.Copy !req
277. We should celebrate with a beer or eight.Copy !req
278. I don't drink.Copy !req
279. Oh, me thinks he doth protest too much.Copy !req
280. He's deathly ill.
Why would he lie about drinking?Copy !req
281. Guilt over killing a man would make
anyone hit the sauce.Copy !req
282. We don't kill people.Copy !req
283. Right.Copy !req
284. You just lie to your friends and family,Copy !req
285. establish false identities, trick people
into betraying their country.Copy !req
286. He'd never
cover up his drinking. He's too honest.Copy !req
287. Hey! Something
I've always wanted to know.Copy !req
288. That poison lipstick
that Ginger used to kiss Gilligan,Copy !req
289. why didn't that kill her?Copy !req
290. Okay, drum roll!Copy !req
291. LP is negative for meningitis.Copy !req
292. Sorry, Cole.Copy !req
293. Fat pad biopsy is... Wait for it...Copy !req
294. Negative for amyloidosis
and Thirteen goes down!Copy !req
295. Could we hurry this up? My son has...Copy !req
296. Can I have a kid, too?
I'm working too hard.Copy !req
297. I could hook you up.Copy !req
298. If I had two minutes
and some anti-nausea meds,Copy !req
299. I'd take you up on that.Copy !req
300. And for the gold...Copy !req
301. Protein's 65, glucose, 70.Copy !req
302. It's MS, start her on interferon.Copy !req
303. Now, turn to the last page.Copy !req
304. Sad rate's 95, ANA's weakly positive.Copy !req
305. Positive, it's lupus.Copy !req
306. Weakly, not lupus. It's MS.Copy !req
307. We obviously don't know what it is.
Treat for both.Copy !req
308. No. I gave in on the tests.Copy !req
309. We're not treating her
for two completely separate diseasesCopy !req
310. because you think
lupus will win you a prize.Copy !req
311. - Still think it's lupus?
- Yeah.Copy !req
312. Me, too.Copy !req
313. In case of emergency,
go to the emergency room.Copy !req
314. Could be lupus.Copy !req
315. That's what we figured.Copy !req
316. Then why are you here?Copy !req
317. You're an immunologist.
We wanted to confirm...Copy !req
318. Who are you looking for me to help you
sell down the river? House or Cuddy?Copy !req
319. Foreman.Copy !req
320. - Sorry.
- He's pushing MS.Copy !req
321. Thinks that because he's in charge,Copy !req
322. he has to prove
he's the smartest guy in the room.Copy !req
323. All I've heard about you, you put
the patient above everything else.Copy !req
324. That's why everyone
finds you so annoying.Copy !req
325. - All House cares about is results.
- I know.Copy !req
326. I'm talking about
how to deal with Foreman.Copy !req
327. So am I.Copy !req
328. Fever's down to 101.5.Copy !req
329. Treatment's working.
Why are we out here?Copy !req
330. Trying to figure out
which treatment's working.Copy !req
331. It's kind of tacky doing it
in front of the patient.Copy !req
332. You put her on steroids, too?Copy !req
333. We had no choice.Copy !req
334. The sad rate pointed to lupus.Copy !req
335. And the ANA ruled it out!Copy !req
336. Doctors!Copy !req
337. Legs hurt?Copy !req
338. I can't feel them at all. I don't think
I can move them.Copy !req
339. Vitals stabilizing.Copy !req
340. Tummy ache's gone as well.Copy !req
341. So, the treatment's working.Copy !req
342. You wanna ditch Dr. Killjoy
and hop on the company jet?Copy !req
343. Little trip down Mexico way,Copy !req
344. and I'm not talking about
the country or the plane.Copy !req
345. Do you think acting like an idiot and
talking about sex works on girls?Copy !req
346. Well, if it didn't, the human race
would have died out long ago.Copy !req
347. You're pretty cheery for someoneCopy !req
348. who was just proved wrong
about his pancreatitis theory.Copy !req
349. I'm appropriately cheery
for someone who's been proved right.Copy !req
350. John hasn't vomited in six hours.Copy !req
351. What's to vomit? I'm eating his lunch.Copy !req
352. Withholding nutrients
is the treatment for pancreatitis.Copy !req
353. That, and the antibiotics you put him on.Copy !req
354. I did unhook your iodine, though.Copy !req
355. Didn't seem to fit with the whole "I'm
just jerking you guys around" Gestalt.Copy !req
356. You're unbelievable.Copy !req
357. Let's ask John if he'd rather be sick
honestly or cured dishonestly.Copy !req
358. John? John?Copy !req
359. Any chance he's just
overwhelmed with gratitude?Copy !req
360. Paralysis.Copy !req
361. It's a new symptom?Copy !req
362. Big white space on the board
where it would fit.Copy !req
363. Nice, multicolored markers.Copy !req
364. I'm not writing it because we can't know
if it's a real symptom.Copy !req
365. When these two went rogue and pumped
her full of steroids, we lost...Copy !req
366. Steroids don't cause paralysis.Copy !req
367. She was also on interferon.Copy !req
368. Giving her both probably
fried her immune system.Copy !req
369. Who knows what infection
you could cause...Copy !req
370. We consulted
an immunologist, she said we have...Copy !req
371. She? You talking about Dr. Cameron?Copy !req
372. - She thought lupus was...
- She tell you to start treating?Copy !req
373. Yes! They've ignored you,
they screwed upCopy !req
374. and it's fun watching you spank them.Copy !req
375. But, can we get back to the medicine?Copy !req
376. The last thing any of you
give a damn about is the medicine.Copy !req
377. Look.Copy !req
378. I'm not saying
you're bad doctors or bad people.Copy !req
379. But House is.Copy !req
380. He created a nasty little cutthroat world,Copy !req
381. planted you in it,
and is watching you play.Copy !req
382. And none of it works
for anyone except him.Copy !req
383. And whoever wins.Copy !req
384. Given its quick progression,
we gotta assume botulism.Copy !req
385. I'll go to her place.
Check out her fridge and pantry.Copy !req
386. It's not botulism. It's polio.Copy !req
387. Brilliant. We should search her home
for FDR's remains or a time machine.Copy !req
388. She could have contracted it from anyone
who's been to Africa, or...Copy !req
389. She's been vaccinated.Copy !req
390. Vaccines wear off.Copy !req
391. There hasn't been
a single American case in over 20 years.Copy !req
392. I've seen this disease.
I know what it looks like.Copy !req
393. That's why you're finding it,
because you're looking for it.Copy !req
394. Polio?Copy !req
395. - It's crazy.
- House wouldn't think so.Copy !req
396. So, go find House
and tell him your theory.Copy !req
397. Take a personal day.
Seriously. Get out of here.Copy !req
398. You don't have the power to fire me.Copy !req
399. But I do have the power
to kick your ass off my case.Copy !req
400. I'm starting the botulism treatment.Copy !req
401. The rest of you, look for confirmation.Copy !req
402. He should be brought up on charges.Copy !req
403. Okay, relax.Copy !req
404. I'll take your book
out from under my piano.Copy !req
405. He's dying of radiation sickness.
He's obviously in pain.Copy !req
406. All of which could have been avoided
if you hadn't interfered...Copy !req
407. What was that for?Copy !req
408. Radiation sickness
kills specific cells at specific times.Copy !req
409. His hair should be coming out in clumps
before he's writhing in pain.Copy !req
410. Since it's not, I know who's
trying to kill him.Copy !req
411. God.Copy !req
412. It's blood cancer, Waldenstrom's.Copy !req
413. Radiation can cause infections,
which set off neuropathy...Copy !req
414. If you had any real evidence of foul play,Copy !req
415. you'd be torturing BoliviansCopy !req
416. instead of putting me into a state
of anticipatory sexual arousal.Copy !req
417. Can we treat for both?Copy !req
418. Bad idea. Unless you're
the one who's trying to poison him.Copy !req
419. I'll arrange for
plasmapheresis and chemo.Copy !req
420. Are you gonna trust him
after what he did?Copy !req
421. I don't have to trust him
to agree with him.Copy !req
422. You make a good point.Copy !req
423. I've been wrong every time and she still
won't listen to you.Copy !req
424. So, either she really likes me
or she really hates you.Copy !req
425. And I got a ride in the jet.Copy !req
426. Oh, hi. What are you doing here?Copy !req
427. Just came to say hi.Copy !req
428. Hi again.Copy !req
429. Where's Mrs. Bearman?Copy !req
430. Sent her home.Copy !req
431. I was scheduling her for an MRA.Copy !req
432. If we gave MRAs
to every patient with a headache...Copy !req
433. This wasn't just a headache,
it was the worst in her life.Copy !req
434. And lucky for you, I'm a neurologist.Copy !req
435. She went to a wine and cheese tasting.
Both triggers for migraines.Copy !req
436. She's never had a migraine before.Copy !req
437. And I never had a blueberry bagel,Copy !req
438. but for the first time I had one.Copy !req
439. Bagels don't kill people.Copy !req
440. This is a classic ticking bomb aneurism.Copy !req
441. Wow. This taught me a lesson.Copy !req
442. I guess when I mess
with other people's patients,Copy !req
443. I risk looking like an officious bitch.Copy !req
444. We're gonna have to
track down Mrs. Bearman.Copy !req
445. Wait. Never mind.Copy !req
446. It's funny.Copy !req
447. It's not funny, it's totally immature.Copy !req
448. It is funny.Copy !req
449. You just can't appreciate it,
because you're the victim.Copy !req
450. Yeah. I deserve shame
and ridicule for offering a consult.Copy !req
451. Unheard of for a doctor.Copy !req
452. You didn't offer a medical consult.Copy !req
453. You offered a
dealing-with-Foreman consult.Copy !req
454. For the good of the patient.
It's what House would have done.Copy !req
455. Maybe House will hear about it
and tear up with pride.Copy !req
456. You think I'm trying to impress him.Copy !req
457. I think that for someone
who's not involved in his team,Copy !req
458. you're remarkably involved in his team.Copy !req
459. Let it go.Copy !req
460. Let him go.Copy !req
461. And that's mature.Copy !req
462. One-twenty over 80. Let 'er rip.Copy !req
463. Now we got the medical stuff
out of the way,Copy !req
464. why don't we meet back at your placeCopy !req
465. for some enhanced
interrogation techniques?Copy !req
466. My safe word is, "Help,
please, please, stop."Copy !req
467. It's two pleases. Anything
less than that, you keep going.Copy !req
468. You actually cure this guy,
I'll show you my private water board.Copy !req
469. We need to consult
an oncologist about the chemo.Copy !req
470. Oh, I'm sorry. I thought you
were still euphemizing.Copy !req
471. My valet knows a little oncology.Copy !req
472. I was wondering when you'd grow bored
of avoiding my calls.Copy !req
473. Oh, I could never grow
bored of ignoring you.Copy !req
474. What's the latest protocol
on Waldenstrom's?Copy !req
475. Where are you?Copy !req
476. CIA headquarters.Copy !req
477. How much fludarabine do you need...Copy !req
478. Either you're sprawled naked on your
floor with an empty bottle of VicodinCopy !req
479. or collapsed naked
in front of your computerCopy !req
480. with an empty bottle of Viagra.Copy !req
481. Please tell me which,
because Chase has another pool going.Copy !req
482. They flew me in to help
deal with a sick employee.Copy !req
483. - How much...
- Hallucinations?Copy !req
484. Damn, I shouldn't have
bet on the Viagra.Copy !req
485. Okay. Call the Langley switchboard,
ask for extension...Copy !req
486. - Thirty-five, seventy-eight.
- Three, five, seven, eight.Copy !req
487. He asked an awful lot
of questions for a valet.Copy !req
488. You know, I happen to have a position
available on my penis.Copy !req
489. Wait a second, I think
I screwed up that joke.Copy !req
490. You offering me a job?Copy !req
491. I'd settle for that.Copy !req
492. As tempting as a position
on your staff is, I like it here.Copy !req
493. Pays better, and we've only had
one assassination attempt.Copy !req
494. And I'm sure you're a great boss.Copy !req
495. That's why your fellows
left en masse a couple of months ago.Copy !req
496. I have satellite images.Copy !req
497. Inspector Gadget?Copy !req
498. My God, you're actually at the CIA.Copy !req
499. You've gotta get down here.Copy !req
500. They've got a satellite
aimed directly into Cuddy's vagina.Copy !req
501. I told them the chances
of invasion are slim to none, but...Copy !req
502. Waldenstrom's.Copy !req
503. Recommended dose is 25 milligrams
per meter squared.Copy !req
504. They do a background check on you?Copy !req
505. Twenty-five milligrams.Copy !req
506. They did a background check on you,Copy !req
507. they did a background check
on your friends.Copy !req
508. Relax. I'm sure they already knowCopy !req
509. that you brought heroin back from
Afghanistan.Copy !req
510. That's not true.Copy !req
511. I've never been to Afghanistan.Copy !req
512. House?Copy !req
513. She's getting worse.Copy !req
514. Her fever's risen slightly.Copy !req
515. But it's definitely... What? Botulism?Copy !req
516. Right? Because if you're wrong again,Copy !req
517. and you're treating her for something
that she doesn't even have...Copy !req
518. The anti-toxin
hasn't had time to work yet.Copy !req
519. I know it's hard, but try to be patient.Copy !req
520. Excuse me.Copy !req
521. I know you're pissed I interrupted,Copy !req
522. but you're gonna be
even more pissed in a second.Copy !req
523. You tested her without telling me?Copy !req
524. Yeah. I know, I'm really,
really sorry, but...Copy !req
525. On the other hand, it's positive.Copy !req
526. She has polio.Copy !req
527. Now what, boss?Copy !req
528. Where's House?Copy !req
529. He's blown off four hours of clinic.Copy !req
530. He's consulting for the CIA.Copy !req
531. Seriously, call Langley,Copy !req
532. and ask for extension three, five...
It's three, five, three, six?Copy !req
533. It's definitely two threes.Copy !req
534. I wrote it down. I have it somewhere.Copy !req
535. He's gonna make up
twice his skipped hours in the clinic.Copy !req
536. Okay-duke.Copy !req
537. And for protecting him,
you're gonna make up twice that.Copy !req
538. Why are you punishing me
worse than him?Copy !req
539. Because House never learns. You might.Copy !req
540. How are you feeling?Copy !req
541. Like crap.Copy !req
542. Yeah. Cancer can be that way.Copy !req
543. My hair is falling out.Copy !req
544. Is that the chemo?Copy !req
545. No, that's too quick.Copy !req
546. So, what does it mean?Copy !req
547. It means you don't have cancer.Copy !req
548. Someone actually did try to kill you.Copy !req
549. You're stubborn. You're arrogant!Copy !req
550. There's no need to yell.Copy !req
551. You may have cost that man his life.Copy !req
552. He's getting the radiation treatment.Copy !req
553. Twenty-four hours too late.Copy !req
554. I didn't yell at you
when I thought you were wrong.Copy !req
555. - I wasn't wrong.
- This isn't productive.Copy !req
556. There is no "productive," it's too late!Copy !req
557. Because of your inexperience,
your poor judgmentCopy !req
558. and your failure to recognize
a reckless fool.Copy !req
559. Cordyceps sinensis.Copy !req
560. It's an herbal treatment
derived from a parasitic fungus.Copy !req
561. Comes from caterpillars.Copy !req
562. Along with dimercaprol chelation,Copy !req
563. it's been shown to mitigate
bone marrow damageCopy !req
564. from radiation poisoningCopy !req
565. in monkeys.Copy !req
566. Sorry. I was stubborn and arrogant.Copy !req
567. Self-recriminations won't help her.Copy !req
568. Nothing's gonna help her, she's got polio.Copy !req
569. There's no cure,
but there are treatments.Copy !req
570. No, she's dying.Copy !req
571. Yeah, every death's a tragedy.Copy !req
572. Funny how you weren't so depressedCopy !req
573. when she was just dying because
me and Amber screwed up.Copy !req
574. And I'm also self-centered,
thanks for clarifying.Copy !req
575. Don't forget self-pitying.Copy !req
576. Vitamin C. Extremely high doses.Copy !req
577. It was experimental treatment protocol
in the '50s...Copy !req
578. And they haven't finished yet?Copy !req
579. They lost funding.Copy !req
580. That's because there's no logical reason
vitamin C would cure polio.Copy !req
581. Well, someone thought there was.Copy !req
582. Someone thought black people
made excellent farm implements.Copy !req
583. I'm not talking about hurting anyone.Copy !req
584. I just want to force-feed her
some orange juice.Copy !req
585. You wanna throw in
some bacon and eggs as well?Copy !req
586. If there's anything you learned today,Copy !req
587. it's gotta be that you can be wrong.Copy !req
588. John, can you hear me?Copy !req
589. We're gonna start you
on an experimental treatment.Copy !req
590. Tea?Copy !req
591. It's a Chinese herb
which has been effective.Copy !req
592. I'm dying, aren't I?Copy !req
593. Probably.Copy !req
594. We're gonna attempt
an experimental protocol.Copy !req
595. - A new drug?
- An old one. Vitamin C.Copy !req
596. Ultra-high doses have been shownCopy !req
597. to destroy the polio virus
and heal nerve damage.Copy !req
598. She could regain use of her legs?Copy !req
599. It's unlikely.Copy !req
600. But we're gonna try.Copy !req
601. Don't give up.Copy !req
602. Nausea's not as bad.Copy !req
603. Radiation sickness has a latency period.Copy !req
604. You'll get better before you get worse.Copy !req
605. Wanna know what
I really did down there?Copy !req
606. Only if it's interesting.Copy !req
607. The women there,Copy !req
608. during Carnival, they...Copy !req
609. They do this dance.Copy !req
610. They call it the devil dance.Copy !req
611. Not interesting.Copy !req
612. I spent the whole 40 days with thisCopy !req
613. attache to the Minister of Defense.Copy !req
614. The most buttoned-down woman
you'd ever meet,Copy !req
615. except when she did this dance.Copy !req
616. She agreed to tell me stuff.Copy !req
617. Okay, you got half a good story there.Copy !req
618. Karma.Copy !req
619. Best way to rid yourself
of that guilt is to confess your sins.Copy !req
620. This pain, it's right. It's comforting.Copy !req
621. It makes me think that somehow
it all makes sense.Copy !req
622. What do you mean 40 days?Copy !req
623. When they found outCopy !req
624. what she'd told me...Copy !req
625. Carnival in Bolivia's only eight days.Copy !req
626. You have any idea
what a chestnut looks like?Copy !req
627. You idiot!Copy !req
628. Who are you calling an idiot?Copy !req
629. Whoever knew that John was stationed
in Brazil, not Bolivia.Copy !req
630. Brazil?Copy !req
631. Well, then, I guess
I'm talking to you, idiot.Copy !req
632. It's the same region.
It's the same parasites, same diseases.Copy !req
633. But not the same language.Copy !req
634. In Bolivia, chestnuts are chestnuts.Copy !req
635. Brazil, on the other hand,
has cast an has-do-péraCopy !req
636. literally, chestnuts from Péra,Copy !req
637. because it would be stupid for people
from Brazil to call them Brazil nuts.Copy !req
638. So, he ate Brazil nuts. Big deal.Copy !req
639. No, he ate a lot of Brazil nuts,
which is a big deal,Copy !req
640. because they contain selenium,Copy !req
641. which in high doses causes fatigue,
vomiting, skin irritation,Copy !req
642. discharge from the fingernail beds
and hair loss.Copy !req
643. Any of that sounding familiar?Copy !req
644. Can you treat it?Copy !req
645. We already started.Copy !req
646. Treatment's chelation, the same as
for radiation sickness.Copy !req
647. The only difference is
it works a lot better on nut poisoning.Copy !req
648. So, what's the problem?Copy !req
649. You're an idiot.Copy !req
650. Why is she shivering?Copy !req
651. Low serum calcium is a side effect
of the treatment.Copy !req
652. I can give her a calcium supplement.Copy !req
653. My arm hurts.Copy !req
654. The infusion rate has to remain high
for the treatment to work.Copy !req
655. Is it working?Copy !req
656. You feel that?Copy !req
657. Yeah, it hurts.Copy !req
658. It's working! This is fantastic.Copy !req
659. There's a lot you could learn
at my fellowship.Copy !req
660. If you knew the procedures
I could teach you...Copy !req
661. Of course, we'd need a nurse to prep.Copy !req
662. I know how to kill a man with my thumb.Copy !req
663. Actually, I was just trying to make
another euphemism for sex.Copy !req
664. So was I.Copy !req
665. Oh, God. How can you
flirt with this idiot?Copy !req
666. He lied to us again and again.
He broke laws, ethical codes...Copy !req
667. I was right.Copy !req
668. That doesn't mean everything.Copy !req
669. It means a lot.Copy !req
670. Dr. Curtis, Dr. House.
I appreciate your help.Copy !req
671. - Hey... Hey-Copy !req
672. When you were dying,Copy !req
673. you tried to infect me,Copy !req
674. because you knew I'd fight for youCopy !req
675. if I thought I was dying, too.Copy !req
676. Are you bringing this up now so I'll
forgive you for messing with my patient?Copy !req
677. I'm happy I changed jobs.Copy !req
678. But I know I'll never have that sort ofCopy !req
679. excitement.Copy !req
680. You miss people trying to kill you?Copy !req
681. No.Copy !req
682. I miss people doing whatever it takes
to get the job done.Copy !req
683. I guess that's why
I'm having trouble giving it up.Copy !req
684. I shouldn't have helped them
mess with your patient.Copy !req
685. They had to screw with me.
I've gotten everything wrong.Copy !req
686. I don't believe it.Copy !req
687. You're not gonna get everything right.Copy !req
688. But you're never gonna
get everything wrong.Copy !req
689. Morning!Copy !req
690. Where have you been the last two days?Copy !req
691. - Overslept.
- We saved speed racer.Copy !req
692. She had polio.
We cured it with vitamin C.Copy !req
693. Yeah. I cured depression
with tonic water once.Copy !req
694. Actually, I think
there was some gin in it, too.Copy !req
695. A hundred and fifty grams over six hours.Copy !req
696. It worked.Copy !req
697. No, it didn't.Copy !req
698. I told you, you can't cure polio.Copy !req
699. It means either
she's not cured or she never had it.Copy !req
700. Since she's walking out of here,
I tested her blood from admittance.Copy !req
701. No polio.Copy !req
702. Means Brennan
screwed up the lab tests.Copy !req
703. Or you screwed up your lab tests.Copy !req
704. You must have. She got better.Copy !req
705. So, it's relapsing
and remitting. Maybe porphyria.Copy !req
706. Well, that's a stretch.Copy !req
707. If she had porphyria,
you'd have seen purple urine.Copy !req
708. You think it's more likely he cured polio?Copy !req
709. Well, they believe it.Copy !req
710. Her symptoms fit perfectly.Copy !req
711. Any alternative is
unbelievably convoluted.Copy !req
712. Some doctor would have to poison her
with thallium so it looks like polio,Copy !req
713. then fake a lab test,
then give her vitamin CCopy !req
714. and stop the poison
so she magically gets better.Copy !req
715. Actually, it is kind of doable, right?Copy !req
716. So, what do you think?Copy !req
717. Shall we test her for thallium before
you contact Stockholm?Copy !req
718. You poisoned her?Copy !req
719. The really shocking thingCopy !req
720. is that Foreman was right
about the heatstroke.Copy !req
721. Vitamin C cures polio. I've seen it.Copy !req
722. Yeah. In some bush clinic.Copy !req
723. You needed polio
in a place with a proper lab.Copy !req
724. The only problem is that places
with proper labs don't have polio.Copy !req
725. There is no money in finding cures for
diseases that only kill poor people.Copy !req
726. This will make them do research.Copy !req
727. What do you care if I faked a lab test,Copy !req
728. if it saves a few thousand lives?Copy !req
729. I did what I had to do.Copy !req
730. Isn't that what you hired us for?Copy !req
731. Which is why I'm not gonna fire you.Copy !req
732. You're gonna quit.Copy !req
733. Go on, get out of here.Copy !req
734. So, you're just gonna let him go?Copy !req
735. Absolutely.Copy !req
736. And I'm gonna let him get as far away
as possible before you call the cops.Copy !req
737. Guy's a nut job.Copy !req
738. Who the hell did I leave in charge?Copy !req
739. Foreman.Copy !req
740. There was a reason for that.
Next time, listen to him.Copy !req
741. Where have you been?
And don't say the CIA.Copy !req
742. Okay-Copy !req
743. By the way, one of my employees...Copy !req
744. Either you're gonna have to
get someone from the CIACopy !req
745. to call and confirm your story,Copy !req
746. or you're doing eight clinic hours
and Wilson is doing 16.Copy !req
747. I was in the Hamptons.Copy !req
748. I was helping some rich hedge fund jerk
treat his son's sniffles.Copy !req
749. Fascinating as that sounds.Copy !req
750. For your honesty,
I will forgive your hours.Copy !req
751. Thank you.Copy !req
752. No!Copy !req
753. The only thing less likely
than you helping the CIACopy !req
754. is you helping some rich guy
in Long Island.Copy !req
755. You're doing your hours and Wilson's.Copy !req
756. I know how to kill a man with my thumb.Copy !req
757. Who doesn't?Copy !req
758. Hi.Copy !req
759. Hi.Copy !req
760. I'm gonna take you up on your offer.Copy !req
761. Yeah?Copy !req
762. Well, I live a couple of miles from here.Copy !req
763. That's not the offer I meant.Copy !req
764. I gave notice today.Copy !req
765. You said you were happy
at the company.Copy !req
766. I lied.Copy !req
767. Doubt you'll hold it against me.Copy !req
768. I'll see you at 9:00 on Monday.Copy !req