1. AND NOW, FOR THE FINAL AWARD
OF THE EVENING—...
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2. THE BEST YOUNG "FILMMAKER"
OF THE YEAR—...
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3. AND THE NOMINEES ARE...
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4. THE SEA MONSTER,
DAVY BOUTON, PRODUCER.
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5. TITANIC II, SHEILA
AND BILLY JONES, PRODUCERS.
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6. THE SHIP IS SINKING.
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7. WE'VE HIT AN ICEBERG.
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8. BUT THE SHIP CAN'T SINK.
IT WILL NEVER SINK.
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9. IT'S INSINKABLE.
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10. IT'S CALLED THE TITANIC.
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11. THERE'S FISH ALL OVER
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12. BECAUSE WE'RE REALLY SINKING
A LOT NOW.
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13. WE CAN'T SINK.
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14. WE SUNK.
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15. I LOVE YOU.
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16. I LOVE YOU.
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17. AND FINALLY, FAT—HER——
BRENDON, MELISSA AND JASON,
PRODOOKEES.
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18. YOU HAD AN AFFAIR?
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19. LOOK, I... I...
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20. AND NOW SHE'S TRYING TO KILL US?
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21. HOW COULD YOU?
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22. I'M SORRY.
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23. WHO IS SHE?
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24. JUST SOME WOMAN.
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25. IS IT BECAUSE I'M FAT?
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26. NO.
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27. IN FACT, SHE'S FAT, TOO.
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28. WELL, WHERE IS SHE NOW?
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29. I DON'T KNOW.
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30. BUT WE'RE SAFE HERE,
IN THE COUNTRY.
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31. SHE'LL NEVER FIND US.
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32. FOUND YOU!
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33. SHE FOUND US!
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34. NEVER FIND US.
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35. BUT THAT'S NOT HER!
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36. AND THE AWARD GOES TO...
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37. HOW DO YOU GET THESE OPEN?
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38. OH, HERE IT IS——
FAT—HER!
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39. BRENDON, JASON AND KALEESEE,
PREDEEKEES.
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40. CONGRATULATIONS.
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41. A FEW WORDS?
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42. KEEP IT TIGHT.
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43. OKAY, WELL, THANK YOU VERY MUCH.
THANK YOU, THANK YOU.
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44. THANK YOU VERY MUCH.
THANK YOU.
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45. GOOD NIGHT!
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46. STOP IT!
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47. SIT DOWN, THANK YOU.
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48. ALL RIGHT, UH, SO I'LL KEEP IT
FOR THE FIRST DAY.
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49. FOR THE THIRD DAY.
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50. AND WE'LL KEEP DOING IT
LIKE THAT FOR...
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51. THE REST OF OUR LIVES.
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52. OKAY.
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53. WHAT IF, UM, ONE OF US
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54. AND THEN IT GETS MANGLED?
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55. WELL, THEN YOU MISS YOUR DAY.
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56. EXCUSE ME, HI.
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57. HI, I'M DIXIE SMITHLY
FROM CHANNEL 1 NEWS
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58. YOU KIDS ON YOUR AWARD.
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59. OH!
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60. I'D LOVE TO DO A PIECE
ON YOU THREE KIDS.
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61. YOU MEAN, UM, BEAT US UP?
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62. NO, NO, OF COURSE NOT!
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63. JASON, NO, SHE MEANS
SHE WANTS TO DO A STORY ON US.
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64. RIGHT?
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65. YEAH, RIGHT.
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66. I THINK IT'S FASCINATING
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67. AND I THINK IT'LL MAKE
A GREAT STORY.
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68. WE'LL DO SOME INTERVIEWS, FOLLOW
YOU AROUND WITH THE CAMERA,
YOU KNOW—...
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69. SEE WHAT IT'S LIKE TO BE YOUNG,
AWARD—WINNING FILMMAKERS.
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70. WHAT DO YOU SAY?
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71. COULD YOU REPEAT THAT?
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72. THERE YOU ARE!
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73. OH!
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74. HEY, WHOA, MOM!
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75. BRENDON, I AM SO PROUD OF YOU.
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76. CONGRATULATIONS.
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77. ARE YOU HIS MOTHER?
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78. HIS GIRLFRIEND.
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79. SHE'S KIDDING, WE BROKE UP.
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80. I'M... I'M HIS MOM, PAULA SMALL.
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81. I'M DIXIE SMITHLY
FROM CHANNEL 1 NEWS.
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82. NICE TO MEET YOU.
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83. OH, HEY, I AM
SO PROUD OF YOU KIDS, TOO.
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84. CONGRATULATIONS!
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85. BRENDON, YOUR MOM'S ALL OVER ME.
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86. CONGRATULATIONS.
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87. THANK YOU, MRS. SMALL.
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88. YOU HAVE REALLY BAD BREATH.
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89. WELL, I THINK THIS IS GOING
TO BE A FUN INTERVIEW.
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90. THAT WASN'T THE INTERVIEW?
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91. YOU SEE, MR. MCGUIRK,
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92. OF YOUR EVALUATION.
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93. YEAH.
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94. WE'RE MOST CONCERNED WITH TODAY
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95. WITH YOUR ANGER.
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96. IN FACT, I UNDERSTAND THAT YOU
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97. INTO THE REVIEWER'S FACE.
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98. ANGER MANAGEMENT THERAPY.
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99. YOU WILL BE TERMINATED.
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100. AM I CLEAR?
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101. UH—HUH.
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102. IT'S ALL UP TO YOU, MR. MCGUIRK.
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103. THESE ANGER MANAGEMENT SESSIONS?
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104. HMM?
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105. THAT'S A YES?
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106. UM, NO... OH, DAMN!
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107. COFFEE, ANYBODY?
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108. BECAUSE I'M...
GOT A FRESH POT BREWING.
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109. IF YOU WOULD LIKE COFFEE.
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110. OKAY, FOUR CUPS OF COFFEE.
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111. CREAM?
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112. JUST A SHOW OF HANDS.
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113. NO, PUT YOUR HAND DOWN
AND THEN SHOW IT AGAIN.
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114. DAD...
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115. OKAY, OKAY, EVERYBODY READY NOW?
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116. LET'S JUST CHAT, OKAY?
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117. LET ME ASK YOU, MELISSA.
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118. WHEN YOU WERE... HOW OLD?
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119. HOW OLD WERE...
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120. WELL, I...
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121. - YEAH, I'M OUT OF COFFEE.
- DO YOU STILL WANT THE CREAM?
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122. DAD, FORGET THE COFFEE.
COME IN HERE.
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123. JUST A LITTLE THING OF SUGAR?
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124. DAD, JUST COME IN HERE.
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125. I'M SORRY.
UH... AM I IN THERE?
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126. OH, SORRY ABOUT
THE COFFEE, GUYS.
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127. HOW ABOUT A HIGHBALL?
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128. MY FATHER'S
A LITTLE NERVOUS.
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129. A SPEED BALL?
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130. I UNDERSTAND.
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131. WE'LL WORK AROUND IT,
NOT A PROBLEM.
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132. DAD, PLEASE, JUST SIT.
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133. OKAY, ALL RIGHT.
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134. OKAY.
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135. YOU KNOW, I'D LIKE TO HAVE
A LAWYER PRESENT WHEN I DO THIS.
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136. YOU ALREADY SIGNED THE RELEASE.
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137. NO, I MEAN, I'D LIKE TO GET
A PRESENT FOR MY LAWYER—...
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138. A LAWYER PRESENT.
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139. OKAY.
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140. THE COVER—UP RUNS DEEP.
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141. HOW DEEP?
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142. UM, REALLY DEEP.
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143. DEEP DEEP.
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144. SO YOU'RE SAYING THAT
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145. POWERFUL MAN IN THE FREE WORLD?
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146. YOU MEAN MEL GIBSON?
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147. NO, I MEAN THE PRESIDENT
OF THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA.
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148. NO, IT DOESN'T RUN THAT DEEP.
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149. THAT WOULD BE REALLY DEEP.
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150. FOR ALL YOUR HELP ON THIS.
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151. WILL THANK YOU, TOO.
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152. I HOPE NOT ALL AT ONCE.
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153. THAT WOULD BE REALLY LOUD.
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154. THAT'S A JOKE.
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155. OH.
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156. GOING ON IN MY LIFE—...
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157. AND EVERYTHING—...
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158. MY... MY SENSE OF HUMOR IS GONE.
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159. UM, ONE MORE THING
BEFORE YOU GO.
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160. I WASN'T LEAVING.
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161. OH.
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162. YEAH.
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163. THAT'S AWKWARD.
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164. IT IS WEIRD.
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165. OKAY, UM, HERE.
I WANT YOU TO HAVE THIS.
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166. HA!
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167. NOW, THAT'S FUNNY.
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168. IT'S NOT A JOKE.
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169. I'LL CHERISH IT.
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170. TO THROW IT OUT.
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171. IT REMINDS ME OF MY FATHER.
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172. OH, DOES HE LOOK LIKE A ZEBRA?
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173. UH, NO.
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174. OH.
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175. SOMEONE'S COMING.
WERE YOU FOLLOWED?
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176. YES, WERE YOU?
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177. YES.
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178. UM... OOPS.
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179. TO HIS WIFE...
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180. OH.
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181. WITH REGARD TO HIS INFIDELITY.
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182. IS THAT ACCURATE?
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183. SURE, THAT'S... YEAH!
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184. WELL, WHAT IS THE SIGNIFICANCE
OF THE ZEBRA?
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185. HUH.
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186. FOR YOUR CHARACTER?
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187. DARK SECRETS?
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188. WOW... HUH!
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189. BOY, YOU SAID IT.
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190. BUT ACTUALLY, NO, NO.
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191. IS THAT IT, UH...
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192. IT LOOKS LIKE A HORSE.
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193. OKAY.
HORSE.
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194. YEAH, AND, UM, IF YOU PUT
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195. ON A HORSE'S GUMS
THEY LOOK LIKE THEY'RE TALKING
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196. AND THAT'S WHY THERE'S
PEANUT BUTTER ON ITS FACE.
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197. YEAH.
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198. IS REALLY GOOD, TOO.
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199. SO, JASON I UNDERSTAND
YOU REALLY ENJOY THE SANDBOX.
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200. AREN'T WE SUPPOSED
TO TALK ABOUT THE MOVIE?
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201. WELL, I'M FOCUSING
ON THE SANDBOX RIGHT NOW.
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202. I WANT TO SEE WHERE YOU...
WHERE YOU GET YOUR IDEAS—...
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203. WHERE YOUR WHOLE GENESIS IS.
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204. WHAT?
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205. THE BEGINNING.
YOUR BEGINNING.
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206. RIGHT.
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207. I LIKE, UM, MY SANDBOX BECAUSE
I LIKE SITTING IN SAND AND...
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208. THAT I'M SITTING IN THE DESERT.
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209. REALLY!
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210. THE DESERT.
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211. LET'S MOVE ON.
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212. OKAY.
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213. SO, I HAVE TO TALK TO YOU
ABOUT THE MOVIE FAT—HER.
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214. YOU'RE PLAYING A LOT
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215. IN THIS MOVIE.
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216. YEAH, I PLAYED 11 CHARACTERS——
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217. INCLUDING ONE WHO'S, UM,
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218. ANOTHER WHO'S
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219. AND ONE WHO CAN'T CONCEIVE,
BUT WHO'S PREGNANT.
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220. MY, MY, MY.
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221. FOR SOMEONE SO YOUNG.
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222. YES, WELL, STUFFING A PILLOW
UNDER MY SHIRT HELPED.
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223. YEAH.
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224. IN THE SANDBOX AND POOP.
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225. AND THE GUY TOOK MY SPOT.
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226. I MEAN, I CLEARLY WAS
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227. AND I WAS PRETTY UPSET.
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228. SO I TOOK A DEEP BREATH,
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229. "HOW AM I GOING TO HANDLE THIS?"
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230. KICK HIS ASS.
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231. WAIT, JON——HOLD ON TO YOUR
THOUGHTS UNO MOMENTO, PLEASE.
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232. I'M JUST SAYING YOU KICK HIS ASS
OR YOU HIT HIS CAR.
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233. LET'S FIND OUT
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234. TO YOUR COMMENT.
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235. CONTINUE, LARRY.
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236. WELL, I TOOK A COUPLE MORE
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237. OVER A PARKING SPACE.
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238. AND I FOUND ANOTHER SPOT——
A BETTER ONE.
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239. A BETTER PARKING SPOT.
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240. TO THE VICTOR GO THE SPOILS.
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241. AND HOW DID YOU FEEL, LARRY?
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242. TELL US.
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243. WELL, I FELT REALLY, UH...
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244. AND LEARN, FOR LARRY WILL TEACH.
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245. WELL, I REALLY FELT, UM...
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246. THINK ABOUT WHAT YOU'RE SAYING,
LARRY.
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247. WELL, YOU KNOW,
I FELT REALLY, UH...
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248. - LARRY, JUST RELAX.
- LET IT FLOW.
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249. YEAH, FOR ME...
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250. - DON'T HOLD BACK, MAN.
- TELL US EVERYTHING.
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251. YEAH.
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252. WELL, I FELT, UH, FOR ME,
IT WAS A...
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253. IF WE LISTEN, LARRY...
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254. WHY DON'T YOU SHUT UP
AND LET ME TELL THEM?
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255. RIGHT.
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256. GO AHEAD, SORRY.
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257. I FELT GOOD, YOU KNOW.
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258. IT WAS NICE TO FINALLY...
FOR ME...
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259. HE FELT GOOD.
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260. GOOD IS GOOD.
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261. STOP INTERRUPTING ME!
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262. I'M GOING OUT
FOR SOME DEEP BREATHS.
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263. OKAY... JON.
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264. MAN, THAT WAS FUNNY,
WHAT HAPPENED WITH LARRY.
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265. HUH?
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266. HE'S MESSED UP.
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267. IT WAS A BIT UPSETTING.
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268. LARRY'S A MESS.
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269. JON... LET'S TALK ABOUT YOU.
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270. TELL ME ABOUT YOURSELF.
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271. UM, I'M NOT FEELING
TOO GOOD ABOUT THIS.
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272. EVERYONE'S UNCOMFORTABLE
AT FIRST, JON.
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273. YEAH, YEAH.
AND THEN WHAT HAPPENS?
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274. WHAT ARE YOUR PROBLEMS,
MY FRIEND?
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275. I MEAN, I'M NOT REALLY
AN ANGRY PERSON, YOU KNOW?
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276. I JUST... I DON'T...
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277. I HATE PEOPLE,
AND I HATE MY JOB...
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278. GOOD——ACCEPTANCE.
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279. AND I HATE MY MOTHER.
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280. I DON'T KNOW;
WORK WITH THAT.
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281. I'LL BE BACK WITH MY DECISION.
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282. ON YOUR HUSBAND?
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283. NO.
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284. OH...
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285. YOU KNOW, BY STUDYING
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286. AND LEAVE EACH OTHER.
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287. TO DINNER SOME NIGHT?
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288. THE BABY DINOSAUR AGAIN.
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289. THAT'S SAD... FOR THE BABY.
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290. YOUNG, SO IT'S NOT THAT BAD.
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291. OOPS.
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292. HERE FOR A SECOND?
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293. SURE.
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294. I MUST SAY, BRENDON
THOUGH IT'S A TAD DIFFICULT
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295. TO FOLLOW AT TIMES,
THIS FILM IS EXTREMELY CREATIVE.
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296. WON THE AWARD.
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297. AW, SHUCKS.
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298. SO, WHERE DO YOU GET
ALL OF THIS CREATIVITY?
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299. I'D HAVE TO SAY FROM MY MOM,
YOU KNOW?
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300. SHE'S, UH...
SHE'S A VERY CREATIVE PERSON.
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301. SHE TEACHES CREATIVE WRITING.
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302. SHE WRITES, YOU KNOW, HERSELF.
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303. SHE DOES. SHE'S A...
AND I'VE READ SOME OF HER WORK.
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304. AND, UH... UH... NOT VERY GOOD,
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305. BUT, YOU KNOW,
SHE'S VERY CREATIVE AND I'D SAY,
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306. LIKE, IF I GET IT FROM ANYBODY
IT'S GOT TO BE FROM HER.
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307. SO, WHAT ABOUT YOUR DAD?
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308. I BET HE'S PRETTY CREATIVE, TOO,
HUH?
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309. UH, BRENDON?
BRENDON, ARE YOU OKAY?
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310. BRENDON!
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311. I'M FINE.
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312. I WAS JUST...
I WAS JUST THINKING.
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313. OH, YOU'RE SUCH
A SMELLY LITTLE GIRL.
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314. FOR MOMMY TO CLEAN UP,
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315. DIDN'T YOU, HUH?
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316. YES, YOU DID,
YOU MADE A LITTLE MESS.
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317. MOM?
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318. YOU DID...
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319. OH, DEAR LORD.
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320. IN THE FLOORBOARDS?
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321. NO, THAT'S
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322. MADE A LITTLE MESSY MESS.
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323. MOMMY'S GOING TO BLOCK HER NOSE
JUST A LITTLE WHILE.
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324. YEAH, I'LL STAND OUTSIDE
THE ROOM A LITTLE BIT.
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325. YEAH.
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326. HEY, UH... UH, MOM?
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327. YEAH?
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328. WHAT WAS THE NAME OF THAT GUY...
UH...
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329. YOU KNOW, THAT GUY
THAT USED TO LIVE UH...
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330. THAT USED TO LIVE HERE?
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331. UH... FATHER.
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332. THAT'S RIGHT.
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333. WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?
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334. UH... NOTHING, JUST QUESTIONS.
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335. DIXIE, FATHER, INTERVIEW AND...
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336. USE SENTENCES PLEASE.
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337. WELL, DIXIE'S BEEN ASKING ME
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338. LIKE HOW CREATIVE IS,
YOU KNOW, MY FATHER
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339. AND I DON'T REALLY KNOW HOW
TO ANSWER THOSE QUESTIONS.
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340. WELL, I... I WAS GOING
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341. ABOUT THE AWARD SO I'LL...
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342. I'LL JUST CALL
AND TELL HIM TO...
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343. TO GIVE YOU A CALL SOMETIME.
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344. OKAY, THAT'S GOOD.
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345. JUST... HE'LL CALL.
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346. YOU KNOW, WHENEV...
WHENEVER IS FINE.
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347. THANK YOU.
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348. DON'T MENTION IT.
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349. I WILL NOT.
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350. OKAY.
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351. OH, THERE'S MY LITTLE JOSIE.
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352. LITTLE GIRL'S ALL NICE
AND CLEAN, ISN'T SHE?
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353. OH... CLEAN.
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354. MOM, CAN YOU NEVER
TALK LIKE THAT AGAIN, PLEASE?
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355. SORRY.
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356. IT REMINDS ME OF MY FATHER.
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357. IT REMINDS ME OF MY FATHER.
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358. IT REMINDS ME OF MY FATHER.
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359. HMM, I GUESS HE'S NOT HOME.
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360. TO GO TO THE MOVIES?
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361. NO, IT KIND OF WOULDN'T BE
THE SAME WITHOUT BRENDON.
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362. I MEAN, WHO'S GOING
TO SIT IN THE MIDDLE?
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363. YEAH, WELL, I'M GOING
TO THE MOVIES.
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364. THE THING IS, BRENDON, A LOT OF
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365. AND THEY DON'T KNOW THE FIRST
THING ABOUT BEING A FATHER.
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366. ALL RIGHT, YOU DON'T...
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367. JANINE!
DO NOT STAND THERE!
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368. YOU HAVE TO RUN!
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369. SOCCER IS A GAME OF RUNNING.
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370. AS YOU SEEM TO THINK IT IS,
WE WOULDN'T NEED SHOES.
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371. OR GO BAREFOOT.
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372. McGUIRK, ARE YOU ALL
RIGHT?
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373. I'M FINE, BRENDON!
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374. HMM.
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375. THANK YOU FOR ASKING.
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376. LOOK, BRENDON, I KNOW YOU BLAME
YOUR FATHER FOR A LOT OF THINGS,
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377. AND MAYBE IT IS ALL HIS FAULT.
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378. THERE YOU HAVE IT.
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379. THANKS.
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380. DON'T MAKE THE SAME MISTAKES
I MADE OR OUR FATHERS.
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381. LIKE WHAT?
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382. ORANGE JUICE IN MY CEREAL.
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383. I WASN'T THINKING.
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384. I JUST GRABBED IT, POURED IT——
I WAS HALF ASLEEP.
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385. THEN I REALIZED I LOVE IT.
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386. I THINK IT'S A GREAT MIX.
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387. THEN I REALIZE IT'S THE
CORPORATIONS, THE ADVERTISERS
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388. FROM DOING STUFF LIKE THIS.
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389. WAY—— MILK—CEREAL.
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390. RIGHT.
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391. ORANGE JUICE—CEREAL IS FINE.
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392. IT ALL GOES IN THE SAME PLACE.
YOU KNOW THE OLD SAYING.
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393. YEAH, I KNOW THAT SAYING.
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394. THE POINT IS, BRENDON, GIVE YOUR
FATHER A CHANCE.
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395. RIGHT.
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396. JANINE, WOULD YOU PREFER
I GET IN MY CAR
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397. AND DOWN THE FIELD?
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398. HUH?
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399. TO GET YOU A RICKSHAW?
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400. HOW ABOUT THAT?
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401. I'LL BE DRIVING YOU UP AND DOWN
THE FIELD IN A RICKSHAW.
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402. WELCOME TO CHINA, JANINE.
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403. OH, CRAP.
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404. WORK IN PROGRESS.
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405. IT'S A COMEDY ABOUT
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406. THE DAUGHTER OF A SELF—SERVE
GAS STATION ATTENDANT, RIGHT,
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407. MISTAKEN FOR BIZARRE, UH...
MISHAPS...
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408. ENDS UP BEING MISTAKEN...
FOR A PRINCESS...
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409. OF INEPT, OVER—THE—HILL MOBSTERS
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410. AND RETIRE.
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411. WOW!
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412. ACTION!
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413. I WANT MY DADDY.
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414. CUT. BEAUTIFUL——THAT'S A WRAP.
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415. 17... 18...
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416. OH, COME ON.
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417. 21... 22.
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418. OH, G... LADY, DO YOU
BELIEVE THIS GUY?
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419. TWENTY—TWO.
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420. IT SAYS NO MORE THAN 12,
BUT THIS FISHHEAD'S GOT 22.
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421. ALL RIGHT, BREATHE.
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422. RELAX... NOW BREATHE AGAIN.
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423. OH, NOW, WHAT NOW...
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424. COME ON, PAL, IT SAYS
12 ITEMS OR LESS, 12 OR LESS.
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425. OH, GOOD, YOU CAN READ.
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426. YEAH, APPARENTLY YOU CAN'T.
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427. HEY, LOOK, PAL,
WHY DON'T YOU SHUT YOUR PIPE
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428. BEFORE MY FOOT CLOGS IT?
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429. OH, IS THAT A THREAT OR A POEM?
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430. NO, YOU KNOW WHAT?
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431. NOT WORTH IT.
FORGET IT.
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432. UM.. I'M NOT WORTH IT?
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433. NO, NO, NO, NO—...
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434. YOU KNOW WHAT?
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435. CONTROL.
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436. I'M GOING TO STAY IN CONTROL.
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437. STAY IN CONTROL, JOHN.
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438. WHAT DID YOU SAY TO ME?
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439. WHEN?
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440. TH... OH...
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441. JUST NOW.
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442. WHAT DID YOU CALL ME?
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443. YOU KNOW WHAT?
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444. I'M NOT TALKING TO YOU.
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445. OH!
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446. YOU THINK YOU'RE BETTER THAN ME,
IS THAT IT?
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447. LOOK, PAL, I USED TO BE JUST
LIKE YOU, SORT OF—...
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448. A LITTLE DIFFERENT.
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449. YOU'RE GOING THROUGH.
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450. BUT I'M TRYING TO DEAL
WITH MY IMPULSE CONTROL.
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451. BOOYAH!
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452. THAT'S WHEN HE HIT ME.
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453. TRYING TO GET A PRICE ON ME.
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454. JOHN, LET ME FIRST SAY
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455. AND YOUR LACK OF RETALIATION.
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456. YOU KNOW, DR. FIZZEL, I'VE GOT
TO BE HONEST WITH YOU RIGHT NOW.
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457. YOU KNOW, BRUTALLY HONEST.
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458. YOU SUCK AT THIS.
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459. ALL YOU DO IS MAKE PEOPLE ANGRY.
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460. TO YOUR DRONING VOICE,
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461. THAT'S MY PROBLEM.
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462. I'LL TELL YOU, I THINK IT'S YOU.
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463. I KNOW WHAT YOU'RE GOING TO SAY.
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464. YOU'RE GOING TO SAY I'M MAD
BECAUSE I'M JUST A MAD PERSON,
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465. I'M AN ANGRY PERSON
BUT THAT'S NOT IT—— IT'S YOU.
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466. TELL ME—— COME ON, MAN.
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467. NO, NO, YOU'RE NOT GOING
TO SUCK ME IN WITH THAT.
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468. DO YOU LIKE CHICKEN WINGS?
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469. YEAH, I... I DO
LIKE CHICKEN WINGS, YEAH, WHY?
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470. THEY'RE DELICIOUS.
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471. WHY DO YOU THINK, MAN?
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472. OH, I THOUGHT YOU WERE GOING TO
GIVE ME AN ANALOGY.
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473. NO, THERE'S NO
CHICKEN WING ANALOGY.
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474. OH.
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475. YOU'RE A WEIRD ONE.
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476. SO, YOU'VE MADE OVER
400 FILMS TOGETHER.
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477. THAT'S AMAZING.
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478. THANKS.
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479. WITH NO ENDINGS.
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480. STILL IMPRESSIVE.
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481. YOU'VE EVER MADE?
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482. WAS 21 AND A HALF HOURS LONG
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483. BUT WE, UM... BUT WE LEFT
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484. SO THERE'S A PRETTY BIG CHUNK
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485. WHERE NOTHING HAPPENS.
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486. OH, OKAY.
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487. ANSWER THE PHONE!
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488. I'M SORRY, DID I INTERRUPT YOU?
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489. OKAY, MELISSA, BRING IT IN.
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490. GOOD JOB, MELISSA.
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491. THANKS, COACH.
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492. AND INTO OUR OWN GOAL.
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493. YEAH, YEAH, I KNOW, I SAW THAT.
IT'S ALL RIGHT.
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494. YOU KNOW, IT'S JUST A GAME.
THESE THINGS HAPPEN.
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495. GOOD TRY, JEREMY.
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496. NICE TRY.
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497. IT'S OKAY.
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498. WAY TO MOVE UP THE FIELD,
JANINE!
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499. VERY GOOD.
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500. NICE SHOT, JEREMY.
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501. IT ALMOST...
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502. HEY! COACH HACK!
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503. WHAT DO YOU TEACH THESE KIDS,
HOW TO LOSE?
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504. BECAUSE THAT'S ALL YOU DO.
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505. I, UH... I THINK THAT THAT GUY'S
TALKING TO YOU, COACH McGUIRK.
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506. LET HIM TALK, BRENDON,
LET HIM TALK.
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507. ALL RIGHT, VERY GOOD.
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508. KEEP IT GOING, DON'T QUIT.
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509. YEAH, I WISH YOU'D QUIT,
YOU BUM!
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510. DON'T YOU HAVE TO KNOW
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511. IN ORDER TO COACH IT?
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512. YES, AND HE DOES KNOW
A LITTLE BIT.
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513. MELISSA, STAY OUT OF THIS.
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514. OH, WHAT ARE YOU, GOING
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515. FIGHT YOUR BATTLES FOR YOU,
YOU WUSSY?
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516. I'VE BEEN WATCHIN' YOU ALL YEAR.
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517. YOU'RE A BUM, A B—E—M, BUM.
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518. AROUND YOU.
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519. OF COURSE, THEY'D HAVE
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520. TO GET AROUND YOUR FAT ASS!
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521. McGUIRK, ARE YOU ALL
RIGHT?
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522. I'M FINE, BRENDON, I'M FINE.
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523. HEY, CAN'T YOU HEAR ME,
LARD ASS?
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524. FILLED WITH FAT, TOO?
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525. CLEAN THEM OUT!
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526. HEY, AREN'T YOU GOING
TO YELL AT HIM OR... OR HIT HIM?
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527. NO, BRENDON, I'M NOT GOING TO DO
ANY OF THOSE THINGS.
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528. ACTUALLY, I FEEL SORRY
FOR THAT GUY.
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529. REALLY?
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530. YEAH, HE OBVIOUSLY HAD
SOME DEEPLY TROUBLING ISSUES.
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531. HE PROBABLY HAD A BAD CHILDHOOD,
JUST LIKE YOU GUYS.
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532. WAY TO GO, JANINE!
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533. WAY TO MOVE DOWN THE FIELD!
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534. BUT YOU'RE GOING THE WRONG WAY
BUT THAT'S TOTALLY OKAY.
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535. HEY! WHAT ARE YOU GOING
TO EAT BETWEEN HALVES, FAT?
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536. ON FAT BREAD, YOU FATHEAD?
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537. BRENDON, DO I LOOK FAT TO YOU?
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538. McGUIRK...
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539. OH, MISS PLUM, YOU LOOK GREAT.
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540. SORRY WE LOST, BUT WINNING
ISN'T EVERYTHING.
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541. WELL, THEY PLAYED A GOOD GAME.
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542. WELL, THE KIDS TRY.
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543. THAT'S WHAT I INSIST ON...
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544. I... I WAS TALKING ABOUT
THE OTHER TEAM.
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545. THAT WAS FUNNY.
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546. SOMETHING TODAY, McGUIRK.
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547. YOU CONTROLLED YOUR ANGER.
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548. I WAS IMPRESSED.
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549. I'VE DECIDED YOU CAN STAY ON
AS SOCCER COACH.
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550. WOW! WHOA, THANK YOU, UH...
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551. THANK YOU, MISS PLUM.
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552. THANK YOU, UH, VERY MUCH.
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553. YOU'VE SHOWN MARKED IMPROVEMENT
IN YOUR ANGER.
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554. YOU'RE EXTREMELY KIND.
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555. YOU'RE PROBABLY ONE OF
THE KINDEST PEOPLE I KNOW.
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556. KEEP UP THE GOOD WORK, McGUIRK.
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557. YEAH.
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558. I'LL BE WATCHING YOU.
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559. THAT'S ILLEGAL.
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560. YOU'RE SURE IT'S THE 6:00 NEWS?
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561. YEAH, DIXIE SAID
IT WAS THE 6:00 NEWS.
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562. BUT IT'S ALMOST 6:25.
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563. IT'LL BE ON.
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564. HEY, THIS DIP
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565. AND I'M NOT TALKING
ABOUT ME, EITHER.
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566. THANKS, ERIK.
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567. DO YOU WANT A BEER?
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568. UH... NO, ONE IS MY LIMIT.
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569. YOU DIDN'T HAVE ONE YET.
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570. OKAY, WELL, BRING IT ON.
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571. I MEAN, LET THE GOOD TIMES ROLL.
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572. DAD.
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573. WHOO, BOY!
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574. THIS IS SO EXCITING, I...
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575. IT'S ON, IT'S ON.
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576. OH, NO, IT ISN'T.
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577. YES, IT IS.
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578. AND NOW HERE'S DIXIE SMITHLY
WITH "ENTERTAINMENT INSIGHT."
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579. THANKS, CHARLIE.
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580. NEXT STEPHEN SPIELBERG,
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581. WOULD COME FROM?
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582. WELL, I HAVE.
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583. IN FACT, I HAD A CHANCE
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584. OF THIS YEAR'S
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585. YOUNG FILMMAKERS AWARD.
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586. AT AGES EIGHT,
EIGHT AND SEVEN,
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587. BRENDON, MELISSA AND JASON
ARE VERY YOUNG.
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588. BUT LET ME TELL YOU,
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589. BECAUSE WE'RE IN
FOR A CRAZY RIDE.
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590. CHARLIE?
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591. THANKS, DISKEE.
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592. AND SPEAKING OF CRAZY RIDES,
HERE'S STORMY WEATHERHEAD
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593. ON THAT DEADLY TORNADO.
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594. STORMY?
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595. THAT'S IT?
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596. ALL THOSE INTERVIEWS?
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597. ALL THAT FOOTAGE THEY SHOT?
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598. I WAS SO YOUNG THEN.
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599. LOOK ON THE BRIGHT SIDE.
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600. IT WAS VERY, VERY POSITIVE.
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601. ALL THREE BIGWIGS.
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602. HUH?
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603. THREE BIGWIGS, MY THREE BIGWIGS.
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604. BRENDON, THAT'S PROBABLY
YOUR FATHER.
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605. HE WAS GOING TO WATCH THE NEWS.
HE SAID HE'D CALL.
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606. WHAT?
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607. MY DA... I MEAN, FATHER?
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608. IT'S UP TO YOU, BRENDON.
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609. I'LL GET IT.
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610. DAD.
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611. HELLO?
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