1. AND NOW, FOR THE FINAL AWARD
OF THE EVENING—...Copy !req
2. THE BEST YOUNG "FILMMAKER"
OF THE YEAR—...Copy !req
3. AND THE NOMINEES ARE...Copy !req
4. THE SEA MONSTER,
DAVY BOUTON, PRODUCER.Copy !req
5. TITANIC II, SHEILA
AND BILLY JONES, PRODUCERS.Copy !req
6. THE SHIP IS SINKING.Copy !req
7. WE'VE HIT AN ICEBERG.Copy !req
8. BUT THE SHIP CAN'T SINK.
IT WILL NEVER SINK.Copy !req
9. IT'S INSINKABLE.Copy !req
10. IT'S CALLED THE TITANIC.Copy !req
11. THERE'S FISH ALL OVER
THE PLACE NOW COMING INCopy !req
12. BECAUSE WE'RE REALLY SINKING
A LOT NOW.Copy !req
13. WE CAN'T SINK.Copy !req
14. WE SUNK.Copy !req
15. I LOVE YOU.Copy !req
16. I LOVE YOU.Copy !req
17. AND FINALLY, FAT—HER——
BRENDON, MELISSA AND JASON,
PRODOOKEES.Copy !req
18. YOU HAD AN AFFAIR?Copy !req
19. LOOK, I... I...Copy !req
20. AND NOW SHE'S TRYING TO KILL US?Copy !req
21. HOW COULD YOU?Copy !req
22. I'M SORRY.Copy !req
23. WHO IS SHE?Copy !req
24. JUST SOME WOMAN.Copy !req
25. IS IT BECAUSE I'M FAT?Copy !req
26. NO.Copy !req
27. IN FACT, SHE'S FAT, TOO.Copy !req
28. WELL, WHERE IS SHE NOW?Copy !req
29. I DON'T KNOW.Copy !req
30. BUT WE'RE SAFE HERE,
IN THE COUNTRY.Copy !req
31. SHE'LL NEVER FIND US.Copy !req
32. FOUND YOU!Copy !req
33. SHE FOUND US!Copy !req
34. YOU SAID SHE WOULD
NEVER FIND US.Copy !req
35. BUT THAT'S NOT HER!Copy !req
36. AND THE AWARD GOES TO...Copy !req
37. HOW DO YOU GET THESE OPEN?Copy !req
38. OH, HERE IT IS——
FAT—HER!Copy !req
39. BRENDON, JASON AND KALEESEE,
PREDEEKEES.Copy !req
40. CONGRATULATIONS.Copy !req
41. WOULD YOU LIKE TO SAY
A FEW WORDS?Copy !req
42. KEEP IT TIGHT.Copy !req
43. OKAY, WELL, THANK YOU VERY MUCH.
THANK YOU, THANK YOU.Copy !req
44. THANK YOU VERY MUCH.
THANK YOU.Copy !req
45. GOOD NIGHT!Copy !req
46. STOP IT!Copy !req
47. SIT DOWN, THANK YOU.Copy !req
48. ALL RIGHT, UH, SO I'LL KEEP IT
FOR THE FIRST DAY.Copy !req
49. MELISSA KEEPS IT
FOR THE SECOND DAYCopy !req
50. AND JASON WILL KEEP IT
FOR THE THIRD DAY.Copy !req
51. AND WE'LL KEEP DOING IT
LIKE THAT FOR...Copy !req
52. THE REST OF OUR LIVES.Copy !req
53. OKAY.Copy !req
54. WHAT IF, UM, ONE OF US
GETS HIT BY A CARCopy !req
55. AND THEN IT GETS MANGLED?Copy !req
56. WELL, THEN YOU MISS YOUR DAY.Copy !req
57. EXCUSE ME, HI.Copy !req
58. HI, I'M DIXIE SMITHLY
FROM CHANNEL 1 NEWSCopy !req
59. AND I WANTED TO CONGRATULATE
YOU KIDS ON YOUR AWARD.Copy !req
60. OH!Copy !req
61. I'D LOVE TO DO A PIECE
ON YOU THREE KIDS.Copy !req
62. YOU MEAN, UM, BEAT US UP?Copy !req
63. NO, NO, OF COURSE NOT!Copy !req
64. JASON, NO, SHE MEANS
SHE WANTS TO DO A STORY ON US.Copy !req
65. RIGHT?Copy !req
66. YEAH, RIGHT.Copy !req
67. I THINK IT'S FASCINATING
WHAT YOU KIDS ARE DOINGCopy !req
68. AND I THINK IT'LL MAKE
A GREAT STORY.Copy !req
69. WE'LL DO SOME INTERVIEWS, FOLLOW
YOU AROUND WITH THE CAMERA,
YOU KNOW—...Copy !req
70. SEE WHAT IT'S LIKE TO BE YOUNG,
AWARD—WINNING FILMMAKERS.Copy !req
71. WHAT DO YOU SAY?Copy !req
72. COULD YOU REPEAT THAT?Copy !req
73. THERE YOU ARE!Copy !req
74. OH!Copy !req
75. HEY, WHOA, MOM!Copy !req
76. BRENDON, I AM SO PROUD OF YOU.Copy !req
77. CONGRATULATIONS.Copy !req
78. ARE YOU HIS MOTHER?Copy !req
79. HIS GIRLFRIEND.Copy !req
80. SHE'S KIDDING, WE BROKE UP.Copy !req
81. I'M... I'M HIS MOM, PAULA SMALL.Copy !req
82. I'M DIXIE SMITHLY
FROM CHANNEL 1 NEWS.Copy !req
83. NICE TO MEET YOU.Copy !req
84. OH, HEY, I AM
SO PROUD OF YOU KIDS, TOO.Copy !req
85. CONGRATULATIONS!Copy !req
86. BRENDON, YOUR MOM'S ALL OVER ME.Copy !req
87. CONGRATULATIONS.Copy !req
88. THANK YOU, MRS. SMALL.Copy !req
89. YOU HAVE REALLY BAD BREATH.Copy !req
90. WELL, I THINK THIS IS GOING
TO BE A FUN INTERVIEW.Copy !req
91. THAT WASN'T THE INTERVIEW?Copy !req
92. YOU SEE, MR. MCGUIRK,
THE PROBLEM IS YOU SCOREDCopy !req
93. EXTREMELY LOW ON CERTAIN PARTS
OF YOUR EVALUATION.Copy !req
94. YEAH.Copy !req
95. AND THE PART
WE'RE MOST CONCERNED WITH TODAYCopy !req
96. IS THE ONE DEALING
WITH YOUR ANGER.Copy !req
97. IN FACT, I UNDERSTAND THAT YOU
RIPPED UP THAT SECTIONCopy !req
98. OF THE EVALUATION AND THREW IT
INTO THE REVIEWER'S FACE.Copy !req
99. IN ACCORDANCE WITH SCHOOL POLICY
IT WILL BE NECESSARY FOR YOUCopy !req
100. TO ATTEND
ANGER MANAGEMENT THERAPY.Copy !req
101. IF YOU REFUSE
YOU WILL BE TERMINATED.Copy !req
102. AM I CLEAR?Copy !req
103. UH—HUH.Copy !req
104. IT'S ALL UP TO YOU, MR. MCGUIRK.Copy !req
105. ARE YOU WILLING TO ATTEND
THESE ANGER MANAGEMENT SESSIONS?Copy !req
106. HMM?Copy !req
107. THAT'S A YES?Copy !req
108. UM, NO... OH, DAMN!Copy !req
109. COFFEE, ANYBODY?Copy !req
110. BECAUSE I'M...
GOT A FRESH POT BREWING.Copy !req
111. JUST A SHOW OF HANDS
IF YOU WOULD LIKE COFFEE.Copy !req
112. OKAY, FOUR CUPS OF COFFEE.Copy !req
113. CREAM?Copy !req
114. JUST A SHOW OF HANDS.Copy !req
115. NO, PUT YOUR HAND DOWN
AND THEN SHOW IT AGAIN.Copy !req
116. DAD...Copy !req
117. OKAY, OKAY, EVERYBODY READY NOW?Copy !req
118. LET'S JUST CHAT, OKAY?Copy !req
119. LET ME ASK YOU, MELISSA.Copy !req
120. YOU STARTED PERFORMING
WHEN YOU WERE... HOW OLD?Copy !req
121. HOW OLD WERE...Copy !req
122. WELL, I...Copy !req
123. - YEAH, I'M OUT OF COFFEE.
- DO YOU STILL WANT THE CREAM?Copy !req
124. DAD, FORGET THE COFFEE.
COME IN HERE.Copy !req
125. JUST A LITTLE THING OF SUGAR?Copy !req
126. DAD, JUST COME IN HERE.Copy !req
127. I'M SORRY.
UH... AM I IN THERE?Copy !req
128. OH, SORRY ABOUT
THE COFFEE, GUYS.Copy !req
129. HOW ABOUT A HIGHBALL?Copy !req
130. MY FATHER'S
A LITTLE NERVOUS.Copy !req
131. HOW ABOUT
A SPEED BALL?Copy !req
132. I UNDERSTAND.Copy !req
133. WE'LL WORK AROUND IT,
NOT A PROBLEM.Copy !req
134. DAD, PLEASE, JUST SIT.Copy !req
135. OKAY, ALL RIGHT.Copy !req
136. OKAY.Copy !req
137. YOU KNOW, I'D LIKE TO HAVE
A LAWYER PRESENT WHEN I DO THIS.Copy !req
138. YOU ALREADY SIGNED THE RELEASE.Copy !req
139. NO, I MEAN, I'D LIKE TO GET
A PRESENT FOR MY LAWYER—...Copy !req
140. A LAWYER PRESENT.Copy !req
141. OKAY.Copy !req
142. THE COVER—UP RUNS DEEP.Copy !req
143. HOW DEEP?Copy !req
144. UM, REALLY DEEP.Copy !req
145. DEEP DEEP.Copy !req
146. SO YOU'RE SAYING THAT
IF I WROTE THIS STORYCopy !req
147. I COULD BRING DOWN THE MOST
POWERFUL MAN IN THE FREE WORLD?Copy !req
148. YOU MEAN MEL GIBSON?Copy !req
149. NO, I MEAN THE PRESIDENT
OF THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA.Copy !req
150. NO, IT DOESN'T RUN THAT DEEP.Copy !req
151. THAT WOULD BE REALLY DEEP.Copy !req
152. I WANT TO THANK YOU
FOR ALL YOUR HELP ON THIS.Copy !req
153. AND THE AMERICAN PEOPLE
WILL THANK YOU, TOO.Copy !req
154. I HOPE NOT ALL AT ONCE.Copy !req
155. THAT WOULD BE REALLY LOUD.Copy !req
156. THAT'S A JOKE.Copy !req
157. OH.Copy !req
158. I GUESS WITH EVERYTHING
GOING ON IN MY LIFE—...Copy !req
159. MY MISTRESS TRYING TO KILL ME
AND EVERYTHING—...Copy !req
160. MY... MY SENSE OF HUMOR IS GONE.Copy !req
161. UM, ONE MORE THING
BEFORE YOU GO.Copy !req
162. I WASN'T LEAVING.Copy !req
163. OH.Copy !req
164. YEAH.Copy !req
165. THAT'S AWKWARD.Copy !req
166. IT IS WEIRD.Copy !req
167. OKAY, UM, HERE.
I WANT YOU TO HAVE THIS.Copy !req
168. HA!Copy !req
169. NOW, THAT'S FUNNY.Copy !req
170. IT'S NOT A JOKE.Copy !req
171. I'LL CHERISH IT.Copy !req
172. I SORT OF WANT YOU
TO THROW IT OUT.Copy !req
173. IT REMINDS ME OF MY FATHER.Copy !req
174. OH, DOES HE LOOK LIKE A ZEBRA?Copy !req
175. UH, NO.Copy !req
176. OH.Copy !req
177. SOMEONE'S COMING.
WERE YOU FOLLOWED?Copy !req
178. YES, WERE YOU?Copy !req
179. YES.Copy !req
180. UM... OOPS.Copy !req
181. I SENSE THAT YOUR CHARACTER
IS TORMENTEDCopy !req
182. BY HIS UNFAITHFULNESS
TO HIS WIFE...Copy !req
183. OH.Copy !req
184. BUT IN THIS PARTICULAR CLIP
HE SEEMS TO BECopy !req
185. A LITTLE BIT MORE ALOOF
WITH REGARD TO HIS INFIDELITY.Copy !req
186. IS THAT ACCURATE?Copy !req
187. SURE, THAT'S... YEAH!Copy !req
188. WELL, WHAT IS THE SIGNIFICANCE
OF THE ZEBRA?Copy !req
189. HUH.Copy !req
190. DOES IT REPRESENT REDEMPTION
FOR YOUR CHARACTER?Copy !req
191. ARE THE STRIPES A METAPHOR
FOR THE CELL THAT KEEPS HIMCopy !req
192. A PRISONER OF HIS OWN
DARK SECRETS?Copy !req
193. WOW... HUH!Copy !req
194. BOY, YOU SAID IT.Copy !req
195. BUT ACTUALLY, NO, NO.Copy !req
196. THE THING ABOUT THE ZEBRA
IS THAT IT, UH...Copy !req
197. IT LOOKS LIKE A HORSE.Copy !req
198. OKAY.
HORSE.Copy !req
199. YEAH, AND, UM, IF YOU PUT
PEANUT BUTTERCopy !req
200. ON A HORSE'S GUMS
THEY LOOK LIKE THEY'RE TALKINGCopy !req
201. AND THAT'S WHY THERE'S
PEANUT BUTTER ON ITS FACE.Copy !req
202. YEAH.Copy !req
203. BUT WHAT YOU SAID
IS REALLY GOOD, TOO.Copy !req
204. SO, JASON I UNDERSTAND
YOU REALLY ENJOY THE SANDBOX.Copy !req
205. AREN'T WE SUPPOSED
TO TALK ABOUT THE MOVIE?Copy !req
206. WELL, I'M FOCUSING
ON THE SANDBOX RIGHT NOW.Copy !req
207. I WANT TO SEE WHERE YOU...
WHERE YOU GET YOUR IDEAS—...Copy !req
208. WHERE YOUR WHOLE GENESIS IS.Copy !req
209. WHAT?Copy !req
210. THE BEGINNING.
YOUR BEGINNING.Copy !req
211. RIGHT.Copy !req
212. I LIKE, UM, MY SANDBOX BECAUSE
I LIKE SITTING IN SAND AND...Copy !req
213. SOMETIMES I PRETEND
THAT I'M SITTING IN THE DESERT.Copy !req
214. REALLY!Copy !req
215. THE DESERT.Copy !req
216. LET'S MOVE ON.Copy !req
217. OKAY.Copy !req
218. SO, I HAVE TO TALK TO YOU
ABOUT THE MOVIE FAT—HER.Copy !req
219. YOU'RE PLAYING A LOT
OF DIFFERENT CHARACTERSCopy !req
220. IN THIS MOVIE.Copy !req
221. YEAH, I PLAYED 11 CHARACTERS——
EIGHT OF THEM WOMENCopy !req
222. INCLUDING ONE WHO'S, UM,
FIVE MONTHS PREGNANTCopy !req
223. ANOTHER WHO'S
SEVEN MONTHS PREGNANTCopy !req
224. AND ONE WHO CAN'T CONCEIVE,
BUT WHO'S PREGNANT.Copy !req
225. MY, MY, MY.Copy !req
226. THAT IS A TREMENDOUS RANGE
FOR SOMEONE SO YOUNG.Copy !req
227. YES, WELL, STUFFING A PILLOW
UNDER MY SHIRT HELPED.Copy !req
228. YEAH.Copy !req
229. SOMETIMES CATS COME
IN THE SANDBOX AND POOP.Copy !req
230. AND THE GUY TOOK MY SPOT.Copy !req
231. I MEAN, I CLEARLY WAS
GOING TO PARK THERECopy !req
232. AND I WAS PRETTY UPSET.Copy !req
233. SO I TOOK A DEEP BREATH,
CLOSED MY EYES AND THOUGHTCopy !req
234. "HOW AM I GOING TO HANDLE THIS?"Copy !req
235. KICK HIS ASS.Copy !req
236. WAIT, JON——HOLD ON TO YOUR
THOUGHTS UNO MOMENTO, PLEASE.Copy !req
237. I'M JUST SAYING YOU KICK HIS ASS
OR YOU HIT HIS CAR.Copy !req
238. LET'S FIND OUT
WHAT LARRY DIDCopy !req
239. AND WE WILL GET BACK
TO YOUR COMMENT.Copy !req
240. CONTINUE, LARRY.Copy !req
241. WELL, I TOOK A COUPLE MORE
DEEP BREATHS AND I REALIZEDCopy !req
242. IT WAS STUPID TO GET UPSET
OVER A PARKING SPACE.Copy !req
243. SO I DROVE AROUND
A LITTLE MORECopy !req
244. AND I FOUND ANOTHER SPOT——
A BETTER ONE.Copy !req
245. A BETTER PARKING SPOT.Copy !req
246. TO THE VICTOR GO THE SPOILS.Copy !req
247. AND HOW DID YOU FEEL, LARRY?Copy !req
248. TELL US.Copy !req
249. WELL, I FELT REALLY, UH...Copy !req
250. LET US ALL LISTEN TO LARRY
AND LEARN, FOR LARRY WILL TEACH.Copy !req
251. WELL, I REALLY FELT, UM...Copy !req
252. THINK ABOUT WHAT YOU'RE SAYING,
LARRY.Copy !req
253. WELL, YOU KNOW,
I FELT REALLY, UH...Copy !req
254. - LARRY, JUST RELAX.
- LET IT FLOW.Copy !req
255. YEAH, FOR ME...Copy !req
256. - DON'T HOLD BACK, MAN.
- TELL US EVERYTHING.Copy !req
257. YEAH.Copy !req
258. WELL, I FELT, UH, FOR ME,
IT WAS A...Copy !req
259. IF WE LISTEN, LARRY...Copy !req
260. WHY DON'T YOU SHUT UP
AND LET ME TELL THEM?Copy !req
261. RIGHT.Copy !req
262. GO AHEAD, SORRY.Copy !req
263. I FELT GOOD, YOU KNOW.Copy !req
264. IT WAS NICE TO FINALLY...
FOR ME...Copy !req
265. HE FELT GOOD.Copy !req
266. GOOD IS GOOD.Copy !req
267. STOP INTERRUPTING ME!Copy !req
268. I'M GOING OUT
FOR SOME DEEP BREATHS.Copy !req
269. OKAY... JON.Copy !req
270. MAN, THAT WAS FUNNY,
WHAT HAPPENED WITH LARRY.Copy !req
271. HUH?Copy !req
272. HE'S MESSED UP.Copy !req
273. IT WAS A BIT UPSETTING.Copy !req
274. LARRY'S A MESS.Copy !req
275. JON... LET'S TALK ABOUT YOU.Copy !req
276. TELL ME ABOUT YOURSELF.Copy !req
277. UM, I'M NOT FEELING
TOO GOOD ABOUT THIS.Copy !req
278. EVERYONE'S UNCOMFORTABLE
AT FIRST, JON.Copy !req
279. YEAH, YEAH.
AND THEN WHAT HAPPENS?Copy !req
280. WHAT ARE YOUR PROBLEMS,
MY FRIEND?Copy !req
281. I MEAN, I'M NOT REALLY
AN ANGRY PERSON, YOU KNOW?Copy !req
282. I JUST... I DON'T...Copy !req
283. I HATE PEOPLE,
AND I HATE MY JOB...Copy !req
284. GOOD——ACCEPTANCE.Copy !req
285. AND I HATE MY MOTHER.Copy !req
286. I DON'T KNOW;
WORK WITH THAT.Copy !req
287. I'LL BE BACK WITH MY DECISION.Copy !req
288. WOULD YOU EVER CHEAT
ON YOUR HUSBAND?Copy !req
289. NO.Copy !req
290. OH...Copy !req
291. YOU KNOW, BY STUDYING
THESE FOSSILIZED FOOTPRINTSCopy !req
292. I BELIEVE THAT DINOSAURS
WOULD OFTEN SPLIT UPCopy !req
293. AND LEAVE EACH OTHER.Copy !req
294. WOULD YOU LIKE TO GO OUT
TO DINNER SOME NIGHT?Copy !req
295. SOMETIMES ONE OF THE PARENT
DINOSAURS WOULD LEAVECopy !req
296. AND NEVER SEE
THE BABY DINOSAUR AGAIN.Copy !req
297. THAT'S SAD... FOR THE BABY.Copy !req
298. BUT SOME ANIMALS EAT THEIR
YOUNG, SO IT'S NOT THAT BAD.Copy !req
299. OOPS.Copy !req
300. CAN WE JUST STOP THE FILM
HERE FOR A SECOND?Copy !req
301. SURE.Copy !req
302. I MUST SAY, BRENDON
THOUGH IT'S A TAD DIFFICULTCopy !req
303. TO FOLLOW AT TIMES,
THIS FILM IS EXTREMELY CREATIVE.Copy !req
304. I CAN SEE WHY YOU KIDS
WON THE AWARD.Copy !req
305. AW, SHUCKS.Copy !req
306. SO, WHERE DO YOU GET
ALL OF THIS CREATIVITY?Copy !req
307. I'D HAVE TO SAY FROM MY MOM,
YOU KNOW?Copy !req
308. SHE'S, UH...
SHE'S A VERY CREATIVE PERSON.Copy !req
309. SHE TEACHES CREATIVE WRITING.Copy !req
310. SHE WRITES, YOU KNOW, HERSELF.Copy !req
311. SHE DOES. SHE'S A...
AND I'VE READ SOME OF HER WORK.Copy !req
312. AND, UH... UH... NOT VERY GOOD,Copy !req
313. BUT, YOU KNOW,
SHE'S VERY CREATIVE AND I'D SAY,Copy !req
314. LIKE, IF I GET IT FROM ANYBODY
IT'S GOT TO BE FROM HER.Copy !req
315. SO, WHAT ABOUT YOUR DAD?Copy !req
316. I BET HE'S PRETTY CREATIVE, TOO,
HUH?Copy !req
317. UH, BRENDON?
BRENDON, ARE YOU OKAY?Copy !req
318. BRENDON!Copy !req
319. I'M FINE.Copy !req
320. I WAS JUST...
I WAS JUST THINKING.Copy !req
321. OH, YOU'RE SUCH
A SMELLY LITTLE GIRL.Copy !req
322. YOU MADE A BIG MESSY MESS
FOR MOMMY TO CLEAN UP,Copy !req
323. DIDN'T YOU, HUH?Copy !req
324. YES, YOU DID,
YOU MADE A LITTLE MESS.Copy !req
325. MOM?Copy !req
326. YOU DID...Copy !req
327. OH, DEAR LORD.Copy !req
328. IS THERE ANOTHER DEAD ANIMAL
IN THE FLOORBOARDS?Copy !req
329. NO, THAT'S
YOUR LITTLE BABY SISTERCopy !req
330. MADE A LITTLE MESSY MESS.Copy !req
331. MOMMY'S GOING TO BLOCK HER NOSE
JUST A LITTLE WHILE.Copy !req
332. YEAH, I'LL STAND OUTSIDE
THE ROOM A LITTLE BIT.Copy !req
333. YEAH.Copy !req
334. HEY, UH... UH, MOM?Copy !req
335. YEAH?Copy !req
336. WHAT WAS THE NAME OF THAT GUY...
UH...Copy !req
337. YOU KNOW, THAT GUY
THAT USED TO LIVE UH...Copy !req
338. THAT USED TO LIVE HERE?Copy !req
339. UH... FATHER.Copy !req
340. THAT'S RIGHT.Copy !req
341. WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?Copy !req
342. UH... NOTHING, JUST QUESTIONS.Copy !req
343. DIXIE, FATHER, INTERVIEW AND...Copy !req
344. USE SENTENCES PLEASE.Copy !req
345. WELL, DIXIE'S BEEN ASKING ME
A LOT OF PERSONAL QUESTIONSCopy !req
346. LIKE HOW CREATIVE IS,
YOU KNOW, MY FATHERCopy !req
347. AND I DON'T REALLY KNOW HOW
TO ANSWER THOSE QUESTIONS.Copy !req
348. WELL, I... I WAS GOING
TO CALL HIM TO TELL HIMCopy !req
349. ABOUT THE AWARD SO I'LL...Copy !req
350. I'LL JUST CALL
AND TELL HIM TO...Copy !req
351. TO GIVE YOU A CALL SOMETIME.Copy !req
352. OKAY, THAT'S GOOD.Copy !req
353. JUST... HE'LL CALL.Copy !req
354. YOU KNOW, WHENEV...
WHENEVER IS FINE.Copy !req
355. THANK YOU.Copy !req
356. DON'T MENTION IT.Copy !req
357. I WILL NOT.Copy !req
358. OKAY.Copy !req
359. OH, THERE'S MY LITTLE JOSIE.Copy !req
360. LITTLE GIRL'S ALL NICE
AND CLEAN, ISN'T SHE?Copy !req
361. OH... CLEAN.Copy !req
362. MOM, CAN YOU NEVER
TALK LIKE THAT AGAIN, PLEASE?Copy !req
363. SORRY.Copy !req
364. IT REMINDS ME OF MY FATHER.Copy !req
365. IT REMINDS ME OF MY FATHER.Copy !req
366. IT REMINDS ME OF MY FATHER.Copy !req
367. HMM, I GUESS HE'S NOT HOME.Copy !req
368. DO YOU STILL WANT
TO GO TO THE MOVIES?Copy !req
369. NO, IT KIND OF WOULDN'T BE
THE SAME WITHOUT BRENDON.Copy !req
370. I MEAN, WHO'S GOING
TO SIT IN THE MIDDLE?Copy !req
371. YEAH, WELL, I'M GOING
TO THE MOVIES.Copy !req
372. THE THING IS, BRENDON, A LOT OF
GUYS BECOME FATHERSCopy !req
373. AND THEY DON'T KNOW THE FIRST
THING ABOUT BEING A FATHER.Copy !req
374. ALL RIGHT, YOU DON'T...Copy !req
375. JANINE!
DO NOT STAND THERE!Copy !req
376. YOU HAVE TO RUN!Copy !req
377. SOCCER IS A GAME OF RUNNING.Copy !req
378. IF IT WERE A GAME
OF STANDING AROUNDCopy !req
379. AS YOU SEEM TO THINK IT IS,
WE WOULDN'T NEED SHOES.Copy !req
380. WE WOULD JUST WEAR SOCKS
OR GO BAREFOOT.Copy !req
381. COACH McGUIRK, ARE YOU ALL
RIGHT?Copy !req
382. I'M FINE, BRENDON!Copy !req
383. HMM.Copy !req
384. THANK YOU FOR ASKING.Copy !req
385. LOOK, BRENDON, I KNOW YOU BLAME
YOUR FATHER FOR A LOT OF THINGS,Copy !req
386. AND MAYBE IT IS ALL HIS FAULT.Copy !req
387. THERE YOU HAVE IT.Copy !req
388. THANKS.Copy !req
389. DON'T MAKE THE SAME MISTAKES
I MADE OR OUR FATHERS.Copy !req
390. LIKE WHAT?Copy !req
391. LIKE THIS MORNING I POURED
ORANGE JUICE IN MY CEREAL.Copy !req
392. I WASN'T THINKING.Copy !req
393. I JUST GRABBED IT, POURED IT——
I WAS HALF ASLEEP.Copy !req
394. THEN I REALIZED I LOVE IT.Copy !req
395. I THINK IT'S A GREAT MIX.Copy !req
396. THEN I REALIZE IT'S THE
CORPORATIONS, THE ADVERTISERS
WHO PREVENT USCopy !req
397. FROM DOING STUFF LIKE THIS.Copy !req
398. THEY PROGRAM US TO THINK ONE
WAY—— MILK—CEREAL.Copy !req
399. RIGHT.Copy !req
400. THEN YOU REALIZE
ORANGE JUICE—CEREAL IS FINE.Copy !req
401. IT ALL GOES IN THE SAME PLACE.
YOU KNOW THE OLD SAYING.Copy !req
402. YEAH, I KNOW THAT SAYING.Copy !req
403. THE POINT IS, BRENDON, GIVE YOUR
FATHER A CHANCE.Copy !req
404. RIGHT.Copy !req
405. JANINE, WOULD YOU PREFER
I GET IN MY CARCopy !req
406. AND DRIVE YOU UP
AND DOWN THE FIELD?Copy !req
407. HUH?Copy !req
408. OR DO YOU WANT ME
TO GET YOU A RICKSHAW?Copy !req
409. HOW ABOUT THAT?Copy !req
410. I'LL BE DRIVING YOU UP AND DOWN
THE FIELD IN A RICKSHAW.Copy !req
411. WELCOME TO CHINA, JANINE.Copy !req
412. OH, CRAP.Copy !req
413. THIS IS OUR CURRENT
WORK IN PROGRESS.Copy !req
414. IT'S A COMEDY ABOUT
A BEAUTIFUL YOUNG GIRLCopy !req
415. THE DAUGHTER OF A SELF—SERVE
GAS STATION ATTENDANT, RIGHT,Copy !req
416. WHO THROUGH A SERIES
OF BIZARRE MISHAPS ENDS UP BEINGCopy !req
417. MISTAKEN FOR BIZARRE, UH...
MISHAPS...Copy !req
418. ENDS UP BEING MISTAKEN...
FOR A PRINCESS...Copy !req
419. AND IS KIDNAPPED BY A BUNCH
OF INEPT, OVER—THE—HILL MOBSTERSCopy !req
420. WHO ARE TRYING TO GET
ENOUGH MONEY TOGETHERCopy !req
421. SO THEY CAN BUY A STRUGGLING
MINOR LEAGUE BASEBALL TEAM
AND RETIRE.Copy !req
422. WOW!Copy !req
423. ACTION!Copy !req
424. I WANT MY DADDY.Copy !req
425. CUT. BEAUTIFUL——THAT'S A WRAP.Copy !req
426. 17... 18...Copy !req
427. OH, COME ON.Copy !req
428. 21... 22.Copy !req
429. OH, G... LADY, DO YOU
BELIEVE THIS GUY?Copy !req
430. TWENTY—TWO.Copy !req
431. IT SAYS NO MORE THAN 12,
BUT THIS FISHHEAD'S GOT 22.Copy !req
432. ALL RIGHT, BREATHE.Copy !req
433. RELAX... NOW BREATHE AGAIN.Copy !req
434. OH, NOW, WHAT NOW...Copy !req
435. COME ON, PAL, IT SAYS
12 ITEMS OR LESS, 12 OR LESS.Copy !req
436. OH, GOOD, YOU CAN READ.Copy !req
437. YEAH, APPARENTLY YOU CAN'T.Copy !req
438. HEY, LOOK, PAL,
WHY DON'T YOU SHUT YOUR PIPECopy !req
439. BEFORE MY FOOT CLOGS IT?Copy !req
440. OH, IS THAT A THREAT OR A POEM?Copy !req
441. NO, YOU KNOW WHAT?Copy !req
442. NOT WORTH IT.
FORGET IT.Copy !req
443. UM.. I'M NOT WORTH IT?Copy !req
444. NO, NO, NO, NO—...Copy !req
445. YOU KNOW WHAT?Copy !req
446. CONTROL.Copy !req
447. I'M GOING TO STAY IN CONTROL.Copy !req
448. STAY IN CONTROL, JOHN.Copy !req
449. WHAT DID YOU SAY TO ME?Copy !req
450. WHEN?Copy !req
451. TH... OH...Copy !req
452. JUST NOW.Copy !req
453. WHAT DID YOU CALL ME?Copy !req
454. YOU KNOW WHAT?Copy !req
455. I'M NOT TALKING TO YOU.Copy !req
456. OH!Copy !req
457. YOU THINK YOU'RE BETTER THAN ME,
IS THAT IT?Copy !req
458. LOOK, PAL, I USED TO BE JUST
LIKE YOU, SORT OF—...Copy !req
459. A LITTLE DIFFERENT.Copy !req
460. SO I KNOW WHAT
YOU'RE GOING THROUGH.Copy !req
461. BUT I'M TRYING TO DEAL
WITH MY IMPULSE CONTROL.Copy !req
462. BOOYAH!Copy !req
463. SO I GUESS
THAT'S WHEN HE HIT ME.Copy !req
464. WHEN I WOKE UP HE WAS RUNNING
MY HEAD OVER THE CHECKOUT THINGCopy !req
465. TRYING TO GET A PRICE ON ME.Copy !req
466. JOHN, LET ME FIRST SAY
FROM THE BOTTOM OF MY HEARTCopy !req
467. AS A CARING HUMAN BEING
I AM SORRY FOR YOUR HUMILIATIONCopy !req
468. AND PAIN BUT I PRAISE YOU
FOR YOUR DETERMINATIONCopy !req
469. AND YOUR LACK OF RETALIATION.Copy !req
470. YOU KNOW, DR. FIZZEL, I'VE GOT
TO BE HONEST WITH YOU RIGHT NOW.Copy !req
471. YOU KNOW, BRUTALLY HONEST.Copy !req
472. YOU SUCK AT THIS.Copy !req
473. ALL YOU DO IS MAKE PEOPLE ANGRY.Copy !req
474. LIKE EVERY TIME I LISTEN
TO YOUR DRONING VOICE,Copy !req
475. I GET ANGRY AND THEN YOU TELL ME
THAT'S MY PROBLEM.Copy !req
476. I'LL TELL YOU, I THINK IT'S YOU.Copy !req
477. I KNOW WHAT YOU'RE GOING TO SAY.Copy !req
478. YOU'RE GOING TO SAY I'M MAD
BECAUSE I'M JUST A MAD PERSON,Copy !req
479. I'M AN ANGRY PERSON
BUT THAT'S NOT IT—— IT'S YOU.Copy !req
480. TELL ME—— COME ON, MAN.Copy !req
481. NO, NO, YOU'RE NOT GOING
TO SUCK ME IN WITH THAT.Copy !req
482. DO YOU LIKE CHICKEN WINGS?Copy !req
483. YEAH, I... I DO
LIKE CHICKEN WINGS, YEAH, WHY?Copy !req
484. THEY'RE DELICIOUS.Copy !req
485. WHY DO YOU THINK, MAN?Copy !req
486. OH, I THOUGHT YOU WERE GOING TO
GIVE ME AN ANALOGY.Copy !req
487. NO, THERE'S NO
CHICKEN WING ANALOGY.Copy !req
488. OH.Copy !req
489. YOU'RE A WEIRD ONE.Copy !req
490. SO, YOU'VE MADE OVER
400 FILMS TOGETHER.Copy !req
491. THAT'S AMAZING.Copy !req
492. THANKS.Copy !req
493. SOME ARE VERY SHORT FILMS
WITH NO ENDINGS.Copy !req
494. STILL IMPRESSIVE.Copy !req
495. WHAT IS THE LONGEST FILM
YOU'VE EVER MADE?Copy !req
496. THE LONGEST FILM
WAS 21 AND A HALF HOURS LONGCopy !req
497. BUT WE, UM... BUT WE LEFT
THE CAMERA RUNNING ACCIDENTALLYCopy !req
498. SO THERE'S A PRETTY BIG CHUNK
IN THE MIDDLECopy !req
499. WHERE NOTHING HAPPENS.Copy !req
500. OH, OKAY.Copy !req
501. ANSWER THE PHONE!Copy !req
502. I'M SORRY, DID I INTERRUPT YOU?Copy !req
503. OKAY, MELISSA, BRING IT IN.Copy !req
504. GOOD JOB, MELISSA.Copy !req
505. THANKS, COACH.Copy !req
506. SORRY THE BALL WENT OFF MY HEAD
AND INTO OUR OWN GOAL.Copy !req
507. YEAH, YEAH, I KNOW, I SAW THAT.
IT'S ALL RIGHT.Copy !req
508. YOU KNOW, IT'S JUST A GAME.
THESE THINGS HAPPEN.Copy !req
509. GOOD TRY, JEREMY.Copy !req
510. NICE TRY.Copy !req
511. IT'S OKAY.Copy !req
512. WAY TO MOVE UP THE FIELD,
JANINE!Copy !req
513. VERY GOOD.Copy !req
514. NICE SHOT, JEREMY.Copy !req
515. IT ALMOST...Copy !req
516. HEY! COACH HACK!Copy !req
517. WHAT DO YOU TEACH THESE KIDS,
HOW TO LOSE?Copy !req
518. BECAUSE THAT'S ALL YOU DO.Copy !req
519. I, UH... I THINK THAT THAT GUY'S
TALKING TO YOU, COACH McGUIRK.Copy !req
520. LET HIM TALK, BRENDON,
LET HIM TALK.Copy !req
521. ALL RIGHT, VERY GOOD.Copy !req
522. KEEP IT GOING, DON'T QUIT.Copy !req
523. YEAH, I WISH YOU'D QUIT,
YOU BUM!Copy !req
524. DON'T YOU HAVE TO KNOW
A LITTLE BIT ABOUT SOCCERCopy !req
525. IN ORDER TO COACH IT?Copy !req
526. YES, AND HE DOES KNOW
A LITTLE BIT.Copy !req
527. MELISSA, STAY OUT OF THIS.Copy !req
528. OH, WHAT ARE YOU, GOING
TO HAVE YOUR KIDSCopy !req
529. FIGHT YOUR BATTLES FOR YOU,
YOU WUSSY?Copy !req
530. I'VE BEEN WATCHIN' YOU ALL YEAR.Copy !req
531. YOU'RE A BUM, A B—E—M, BUM.Copy !req
532. I COULD COACH CIRCLES
AROUND YOU.Copy !req
533. OF COURSE, THEY'D HAVE
TO BE PRETTY BIG CIRCLESCopy !req
534. TO GET AROUND YOUR FAT ASS!Copy !req
535. COACK McGUIRK, ARE YOU ALL
RIGHT?Copy !req
536. I'M FINE, BRENDON, I'M FINE.Copy !req
537. HEY, CAN'T YOU HEAR ME,
LARD ASS?Copy !req
538. OR ARE YOUR EARDRUMS
FILLED WITH FAT, TOO?Copy !req
539. CLEAN THEM OUT!Copy !req
540. HEY, AREN'T YOU GOING
TO YELL AT HIM OR... OR HIT HIM?Copy !req
541. NO, BRENDON, I'M NOT GOING TO DO
ANY OF THOSE THINGS.Copy !req
542. ACTUALLY, I FEEL SORRY
FOR THAT GUY.Copy !req
543. REALLY?Copy !req
544. YEAH, HE OBVIOUSLY HAD
SOME DEEPLY TROUBLING ISSUES.Copy !req
545. HE PROBABLY HAD A BAD CHILDHOOD,
JUST LIKE YOU GUYS.Copy !req
546. WAY TO GO, JANINE!Copy !req
547. WAY TO MOVE DOWN THE FIELD!Copy !req
548. BUT YOU'RE GOING THE WRONG WAY
BUT THAT'S TOTALLY OKAY.Copy !req
549. HEY! WHAT ARE YOU GOING
TO EAT BETWEEN HALVES, FAT?Copy !req
550. HOW ABOUT A FAT SANDWICH
ON FAT BREAD, YOU FATHEAD?Copy !req
551. BRENDON, DO I LOOK FAT TO YOU?Copy !req
552. McGUIRK...Copy !req
553. OH, MISS PLUM, YOU LOOK GREAT.Copy !req
554. SORRY WE LOST, BUT WINNING
ISN'T EVERYTHING.Copy !req
555. WELL, THEY PLAYED A GOOD GAME.Copy !req
556. WELL, THE KIDS TRY.Copy !req
557. THAT'S WHAT I INSIST ON...Copy !req
558. I... I WAS TALKING ABOUT
THE OTHER TEAM.Copy !req
559. THAT WAS FUNNY.Copy !req
560. BUT YOU SHOWED ME
SOMETHING TODAY, McGUIRK.Copy !req
561. YOU CONTROLLED YOUR ANGER.Copy !req
562. I WAS IMPRESSED.Copy !req
563. I'VE DECIDED YOU CAN STAY ON
AS SOCCER COACH.Copy !req
564. WOW! WHOA, THANK YOU, UH...Copy !req
565. THANK YOU, MISS PLUM.Copy !req
566. THANK YOU, UH, VERY MUCH.Copy !req
567. YOU'VE SHOWN MARKED IMPROVEMENT
IN YOUR ANGER.Copy !req
568. YOU'RE EXTREMELY KIND.Copy !req
569. YOU'RE PROBABLY ONE OF
THE KINDEST PEOPLE I KNOW.Copy !req
570. KEEP UP THE GOOD WORK, McGUIRK.Copy !req
571. YEAH.Copy !req
572. I'LL BE WATCHING YOU.Copy !req
573. THAT'S ILLEGAL.Copy !req
574. YOU'RE SURE IT'S THE 6:00 NEWS?Copy !req
575. YEAH, DIXIE SAID
IT WAS THE 6:00 NEWS.Copy !req
576. BUT IT'S ALMOST 6:25.Copy !req
577. IT'LL BE ON.Copy !req
578. HEY, THIS DIP
IS UNBELIEVABLECopy !req
579. AND I'M NOT TALKING
ABOUT ME, EITHER.Copy !req
580. THANKS, ERIK.Copy !req
581. DO YOU WANT A BEER?Copy !req
582. UH... NO, ONE IS MY LIMIT.Copy !req
583. YOU DIDN'T HAVE ONE YET.Copy !req
584. OKAY, WELL, BRING IT ON.Copy !req
585. I MEAN, LET THE GOOD TIMES ROLL.Copy !req
586. DAD.Copy !req
587. WHOO, BOY!Copy !req
588. THIS IS SO EXCITING, I...Copy !req
589. IT'S ON, IT'S ON.Copy !req
590. OH, NO, IT ISN'T.Copy !req
591. YES, IT IS.Copy !req
592. AND NOW HERE'S DIXIE SMITHLY
WITH "ENTERTAINMENT INSIGHT."Copy !req
593. THANKS, CHARLIE.Copy !req
594. HAVE YOU EVER WONDERED WHERE THE
NEXT STEPHEN SPIELBERG,Copy !req
595. JODIE FOSTER OR ED WOOD
WOULD COME FROM?Copy !req
596. WELL, I HAVE.Copy !req
597. IN FACT, I HAD A CHANCE
TO SIT DOWN AND CHATCopy !req
598. WITH THREE FUTURE
HOLLYWOOD BIGWIGSCopy !req
599. WHO WERE THE RECENT RECIPIENTS
OF THIS YEAR'SCopy !req
600. YOUNG FILMMAKERS AWARD.Copy !req
601. AT AGES EIGHT,
EIGHT AND SEVEN,Copy !req
602. BRENDON, MELISSA AND JASON
ARE VERY YOUNG.Copy !req
603. BUT LET ME TELL YOU,
IF THESE KIDSCopy !req
604. ARE THE FUTURE OF MOVIES
THEN HOLD ON TO YOUR POPCORNCopy !req
605. BECAUSE WE'RE IN
FOR A CRAZY RIDE.Copy !req
606. CHARLIE?Copy !req
607. THANKS, DISKEE.Copy !req
608. AND SPEAKING OF CRAZY RIDES,
HERE'S STORMY WEATHERHEADCopy !req
609. WITH THE LATEST
ON THAT DEADLY TORNADO.Copy !req
610. STORMY?Copy !req
611. THAT'S IT?Copy !req
612. ALL THOSE INTERVIEWS?Copy !req
613. ALL THAT FOOTAGE THEY SHOT?Copy !req
614. I WAS SO YOUNG THEN.Copy !req
615. LOOK ON THE BRIGHT SIDE.Copy !req
616. IT WAS VERY, VERY POSITIVE.Copy !req
617. SHE CALLED YOU
ALL THREE BIGWIGS.Copy !req
618. HUH?Copy !req
619. THREE BIGWIGS, MY THREE BIGWIGS.Copy !req
620. BRENDON, THAT'S PROBABLY
YOUR FATHER.Copy !req
621. HE WAS GOING TO WATCH THE NEWS.
HE SAID HE'D CALL.Copy !req
622. WHAT?Copy !req
623. MY DA... I MEAN, FATHER?Copy !req
624. IT'S UP TO YOU, BRENDON.Copy !req
625. I'LL GET IT.Copy !req
626. DAD.Copy !req
627. HELLO?Copy !req